Feel better about my weight, but I'm still self conscious!
Okay, I've lost almost 25lbs, and I KNOW I look better weight-wise. I get compliments frequently on it. However, I still feel self conscious, but the feelings have shifted from obsessing over my fat tummy and jiggly thighs to pimples and a million other things that displease me when I look in the mirror.
I used to look in the mirror and think "Ew, gross, I look fat." Now, after losing weight, I do feel better about my weight, but I don't feel better when I look in the mirror. Now it's just "Ew, gross, look at that break out, look at that whisker on my chin, look at my flat hair..." And the list goes on. I always noticed the other stuff, but it didn't really offend me as much. I thought, as long as I was skinnier, I would feel beautiful. Now I am skinnier, but I don't feel anymore beautiful, a list of other imperfections are just taking the place of my weight.
Clearly, I just have an issue with self esteem, I realize this. I could probably trade my body in for a supermodel and still be able to find things that are wrong with it. I just don't know how to get over it. For once, I just want to leave my house feeling beautiful and confident just because I am me and not because of how I look or what other people think. I just don't know how to get there.
What I've found helps (for me) is to STOP all negative talk. Every morning, after I'm ready for work, I say to myself - well you're looking good - or some derivative of that.
You can still look at yourself and see things that you think need improvement, but you have to stop putting yourself down. No one can love you if you don't love yourself, so you have to start appreciating your body
Ditto to what stella said. Kind of ties in with what I just posted in the motto thread, fake it till you make it. keep telling yourself you're beautiful and eventually you'll start to believe it.
I can totally relate. I always thought, "If I lose weight, I'll feel so confident and good about myself and I'll look so much better!" but it's almost like we become so much more self aware during this process and end up just adding and adding to the list of things we "need" to change. It has to be all the additional time in the mirror!
I think this is where you have to start really focusing on the inside. Building that confidence from inside out. I think most women need to seperate self esteem from physical appearance...it's unfortunate that they seem to go hand in hand with each other. It's something I struggle with so much.
I agree with Stella...saying positive things (even if you feel kind of crappy) really makes a big difference. If you keep saying positive things to yourself, maybe eventually you'll start believing them. I think you look really good, by the way.
I've started losing weight, (i measure in inches and so far i've lost 20 3/4) inches total over my body, and I go through the same thing. I went and got my hair and nails done and this made a huge difference! Just feeling better and pampering myself was wonderful!
I know the feeling. Self esteem issues is self esteem issues. We have to love ourselves or something will always be "wrong". Weight is just a physical manifestation of an emotional issue for some. Atleast, that's what I feel is my case.
See, I was always chastised as a child if I said something like "I think I look nice today" so for me, its getting over the "its not wrong if you think you look good." Its a big problem, but I'm working through it.
There's a line between being conceited and being aware, you just have to find that line.
See, I was always chastised as a child if I said something like "I think I look nice today" so for me, its getting over the "its not wrong if you think you look good." Its a big problem, but I'm working through it.
There's a line between being conceited and being aware, you just have to find that line.
The difference between being conceited and being aware that you look good is when you feel you are better than someone else. No one should be chastized for thinking they look nice.
Feel better about my weight, but I'm still self conscious!
