my best friend has like this guy for awhile now and they are also close friends...anyways she came over crying, didnt know it at the time but they "sealed the deal" if u no what i mean. lol he just recently told her out of all the girls he slept with that she was the only one that didn't mean anything to him...i was shocked didnt know what to say... she is hurt by it and wants to know if she should be friends with him...n i dont know what to tell her cuz they been friends for like 9 yrs...im not really friends with him..but i dont know what to tell her... any sugg
Friends for 9 years yet she doesn't mean anything to him? I hope for being friends for so long that she DID mean something to him.
Anyways, I think she has to revaluate the relationship. Some friends can still be friends after sex. Depends on the friendship and how they will be able to act around each other after the fact. But, if he "doesn't care about her"... than maybe she shouldn't be friends with the guy.
If he told her that he was the only girl he didn't care about, it's unfortunately probably true. Sometimes guys don't share their feelings, but they very rarely lie and say the opposite of them. Guys are pretty simple. I think that she definitely should reevaluate the relationship; even if it didn't mean anything to him, if he was her friend he would make an effort to be nice about it. Or at least just go AWOL and have her figure it out.
He's not worth it, anyway. She doesn't want to be with someone who doesn't want to be with her. If she really still wants to be friends with him - despite the disrespect he has shown her - she should call him out on it and see what he says. It will be hard to do that, but if there is any merit to the relationship she'll find out then.
She did tell him it was mean and hurtful. And told her it is what it is... I think thats rude. What girl would want to hear that if its a friend or not
I would tell her he is not a friend and may be she needs to cut her ties to him. It was rude and mean of him to tell her that. Then, when your friend tells him how she feels and he says it is what it is, well again more meanness and rudeness. He could've said it better. They have known each other for 9 years and yet he doesn't know anything about your friend or he would've tried to spare her feelings. Does she defend him when she talks to you about him? If she does, then she obviously really really likes him and probably won't want to hear the truth about what you think. hard situation to be in
Last edited by kisskiss; 01-07-2010 at 10:14 PM.
Reason: spelling error lol
wow that's cold.
Is there anything that went on between the two that made him say that? I mean 9 years is a very long time to be friends and for him to say that just seems odd.
from my experience guys can lie, and if they feel their feelings were hurt in a situation then they may try and hurt the girls as well. IDK. It just seems like there is more to the story.
If I was in her shoes I would sever all ties with him IMMEDIATELY. That was very heartless of him to say let alone do. Any true friend would care enough to not "take advantage" of her like that in the first place. That kind of friend that he is, is not worth having
I would have to say, I have no idea what would cause him to say that, whether it's the truth or some more complicated thing, but it basically boils down to, he's a dumbass and she should move on. Easier said than done but...
If she's dumb enough to defend him, she's dumb enough to stay with him or whatever. She wants to be walked on by him I'd say let her but be completely honest with her that she's an idiot. It might get through her head it might not. All you can do is listen to the story and try and be there but chances are you might get sick of hearing about it because she won't do anything about it and continues to put up with it. It's all about self respect and if you don't have self respect then you stick around with these kinds of people.
If it were me I'd appreciate the honesty, rather than getting stringed along. However, you can tell this guy's a real jerk by telling her he doesn't care about her AFTER he slept without her and not before. 9 years or not, I'd drop him as fast as I could--that's not a real friend, PERIOD.
Ouch! If he was worth being her friend he would at least have let her down easy after sleeping with her!
Sometimes, a guy will say something mean and harsh, because they want the message to get through!
Your friend is refusing to listen to what he is bluntly telling her, and it will only hurt her in the future.
Hey, if he changes his mind and wants to be friends (and treat her with some respect), he can pick up the phone and apologize. Otherwise, I would move on, as hard as that may be.
ot boy advice
