I am so ashamed of myself but I have to write this down because I think when I stop hiding from the facts it maybe might help?
I had a lap-band 4 months ago. For the first month I have lost around 15 pounds and than just stopped in a minute. I dont know what happened but it was some kind of click or fear in my head and I have stopped.
Now i regained most of the weight back and on the 25th I have to visit my suregion for check-up. I am sure he will kill me :-) but that is not my key problem. My problem is that I didnt do anything and all that time and money was spent for nothing!
And the second thing is - if surgery did not help me, what the **** could?
I must say that I can eat freaking everything in any amount I like. I dont see any fu..king effect.
Did anyone had such a problem? Did I stretch my stomach?
Ok, I do admit I am kind of nervous because I ended the bad relationship and removed melanoma and that was such a stress for me. The man was and still is emotional bully but I am still in love with him deep in my heart (i know).
With the holidays and all of that I dont see what should I eat and how. I know everything in theory but in practice no I dont. I feel like ****. My mother got retired early a few days ago and now she is making pressure to me to have children (like Virgin Mary I guess) and all around me people having some kind of problems and would like me to participate in them and listen...End nobody would like to listen to me? I think I sholu dump them all.
Back to the topic - did you ever heard of anyone eating as a pig WITH A LAP BAND? Did I stretch my stomach? Is that dangerous?
01-01-2010, 05:20 PM
How to get back on track?
Writing this I think I sholud call my doctor and ask for early appointment and filling. I have only 2ML in the band, I wolud like to have more!
01-01-2010, 07:35 PM
:hug: hang in there !!!
It is very normal to be able to eat anything in any amounts if your restriction is off. Do you know what size band you have? this is very very important to know because if you have a 10 cc band and you only have 2 cc's in it.. then there is your answer. Even if you have a 4 cc band, just because you have 2 cc's doesn't mean you have enough restriction. Don't forget it can take many visits (fills) before you hit your sweet spot. And never compare yourself to anyone else because we all react different with the band.
Did your doctor give you any guidelines as what to eat? proteins first, veggies second and last carbs? You might want to call your nutritionist and talk to her/him too. With the band you should only lose 1-2 lbs a week so remember its a slow healthy process.
What most folks don't realize is the band is only a tool, just like gastric bypass and other weight loss surgery. All these tools will help you only so far..the rest has to come from eating healthy and exercise. If your going to eat crap.... well, your not going to lose weight, we still have to be careful what we put in our bodies.
I'm so glad your going back to your doctor, please don't be so hard on yourself, the band is a great tool, you just have to learn how to work it and be patient.
Let us know what your doc says.. we're rootin for yah.
01-01-2010, 08:34 PM
Leeine, thank you so much...I did cried my eyes tonight and not really sure about what anymore - I think everything!
The band is 11 ml big but now I have only 2 ml and my doctor is filling it up to 6 ml only. Its a new procedure in my country so I think he just would like to take it slow. I do understand him because his is afraid of complications but I think this is far to slow!
After I have wrote here I have realized that I am mentally and emotionally abused by a man and I always thought about myself as a person that is not a "victim type". Now I see I am. Its hard to admit that but after this post I have realized I have to change a lots of things not just my eating.
I did eat a lot of crap and I did compare myself to others. And you know, all the ladies that I have spoke to in the doctors office were shocked by me and telling me that day could not eat anything solid for months or even some of them drinking water at the beginning. And I felt bad about myself thinking that maybe the band fell down or something. Only one girl was honest and told me that at the beginning she did not feel anything really. And all other were full of crap, and I believed them.
So that is additional reason that I would like to thank you for your post. Its nice and kind and tx so much I was really needing it.
I am not sure about my doctor anymore, maybe I should wait the 25th, maybe I will get a grip until than. But in fact I would like a filling as soon as possible so maybe I should call him.
Here, doctors are not so friendly as in USA so I am kind of afraid a little bit because he will probably yell at me for gaining weight and I dont really like that negative approach. I would much more appreciate the positive one...I am not sure what I will do...have to think about it a little...
And I think I will go to my mothers home for lunch tomorrow /i have promised to come/ for the last time. She will have to accept that I will not come if she is going to feed me and sabotage me in that way!
01-02-2010, 12:49 AM
Hiya Nomena. I don't have a lap band so i have no idea about your questions there. However, with your emotional and family issues... I definitely hear you there. I have a similar situation and really, I have to just take it a step at a time. One conversation at a time, etc, with the people who bring me down. I try not to let them affect me anymore, but it does. Not as much as it used to - I have tried to busy myself with other things like reading and watching tv shows more often.
I went on Celexa (an anti-depressant/anti-anxiety med) and it did help... but it makes me sleep too much. I am hoping to switch to another med this week, because it really did help with my emotional issues from dealing with difficult family and such. I bring it up because it might be worth looking into. However, keep in mind that SSRIs like Celexa can and do cause weight gain or stalling usually. There are other types of meds that don't.
Good luck and hang in there, you're dealing with a lot right now. Just treat yourself like you would treat a friend. Take it easy!
01-02-2010, 09:27 AM
Nomena when I awoke from surgery I wanted a cheese burger, no lie... When I was 6 weeks out of surgery I could eat an entire hero sandwich, thats HUGE !!! I told my doctor and he said so? you have no restriction. I was shocked because like you, I was comparing myself to others and thats when I started to do damage with myself emotionally.
I'm sorry to hear about your relationship with that guy... but I'm happy you realize something must be done. Taking care of yourself mentally and physically MUST come first.. please remember that. You are worth it.
I'm sorry your mom sabotages your eating.. my mom does the same thing. When you go to her house, walk in with a bottle of water and maybe some gum... If you feel the urge to eat or if you feel pressured, chew the gum or drink the water. I'm telling you its the only thing that saves me from my Mom lol. The minute anyone walks in her house she has a fork up to their face. The more you resist at her house the stronger you'll become... trust me on this one LOL Its OK to say NO !!!! it really is.
So what I'm hearing, your plan is to:
Continue getting fills
Don't compare yourself w/anyone else
Exercise (I threw that one in there for yah lol)
Deal with this person who is making you feel less of a person
Take control over "Mom" and her sabotaging by saying NO thank you.
Wheeeeew thats a lot my dear... Just remember, take it one step and one day at a time... and slow IS good !!!
I hope you'll continue to post here and meet the other weight loss surgery chickies... they are wonderful and so supportive.
01-02-2010, 10:49 AM
Nomena, bring a side dish to Mom's house- a nicely loaded salad with lots of veggies, or a 0-point soup- then you can take a little tiny serving of her meal without derailing yourself, and hopefully she'll just see the side dish as a nice gesture to her as a hostess. win-win? I hope? LOL. The water bottle and gum are great advice as well, so you aren't wooed in by the cooking smells.
01-02-2010, 04:55 PM
Hej Girls, tx a lot for the encouragement! I feel better tonight and last night I was so depressed and just crying! And after this post and coming honest to myself and your words I am feeling better, thank you so much!
First of all Leenie I like you chicken :-) and the smiles at the bottom of your posts. Are they slapping each other? It reminded me of my brother and me as we were kids but we loved each other with the bottom of our hearts...thank you...
You did resumed the chores correctly and you did it in such a manner that I, as an organized person, could identify to them :-)) Girl, you got them right!
First, I do live alone in my own flat and that is good news! I broke up with the guy a few months ago but he emotionally abuses me from time to time. I realized that last night and I am a people pleasure (or I was) so I will have to change my attitude to him! He does not deserve my kindness...
01-02-2010, 05:04 PM
Also, Naked (what a nick, LOL) that is a great idea - to bring some food with me. I think that can do. Also, water and the gums too.
My Mum is a "feeder" and she also attacks anyone who comes in that house with the fork. I had one friend that visited last time with me and she was delighted with my Mom because she was feeding her the whole day with something! I know that is nice for one afternoon but what do you think how did I got this big? :-)))
I went to my parents house today and eat a lot but I did tell my parents that is the last time and that in future I will not be able to eat like that because doctor will fill me in and I could die :-) if they will feed me. Ok I lied but that is the only way to stop my mom. I think that will work.
And there was one interesting moment- I said - now, he will fill me in, and now I have to loose weight. And my mom said - but you already have lost the weight and dont have to any more. And I am around 220 pounds!!! In that moment I have realized that she is afraid that I will get thin and the whole my life she could pick on my that I am fat. But, to make a long story short - I know that is not my problem and she will have to deal with it. I have decided that I wont to take care of me and my life and have kids until I can ! I am 35,5 years and not married. And my goal is to be married, thin and a mother of a child (2 would be great) on my 40-th birthday. And with every post that I put here I am surer of it! :)
Leenie, I will go to the swimming pool tomorrow so you did throw in good :-)
What are your goals for the New Year? Whats up with you...don’t let me talking! LOL
01-02-2010, 05:39 PM
And one more thing - I have to be honest about my weight. I went to operation with 240 pounds, I lost and gain back, and now I am at 227 pounds.
At the check up after 3 months (4 post op) I will have 5 pounds MORE and I should have at least 15-20 pounds less. I think you can get the picture what is wrong here :-)
I had to write this down because my brain is fooling me and sometimes I count more or less pounds that I have and I am note sure how much I really loose and gained back and so on. So I have to put it here - it releases my spirit.
The problem is also that I count in KG not pounds, so all this transfer is harder to me. I think I will start putting KG and you can just multiply by 2.1 :-)
I have noticed that I prefer old fashion scale with the pointer to digital one. I think I will change with my mother for the scale. I am more visual type and digital number does not ring a bell and the pointer does! I like seeing it going down and not up :-))
01-03-2010, 09:59 AM
I'm really glad you had a talk with your Mom.. good for you. People that visit my mom think its funny when she shovels food in their face (except my husband, he gets offended lol) but I find it horrible. Then I have to remember that my Mom grew up with out food, starving actually, so offering food to others gives her the greatest pleasure and satisfaction. So I have to step back and just remember that when I see her I need to control my own actions and not worry about others. She's a good Mom and I love her dearly.
Anyway.... I'm glad you have a plan for the new year and you've included exercise.
My goals for this year is more exercise... I am a slug. I work a full time job, come home, cook, clean, help my daughter do home work, showers, etc... so I need to learn how to put some exercise into my day. I am going to try for lunch time...weather permitting. Also I would like to lose a good 60 lbs so wrapping my head around some healthy eating is going to be a challenge. One day at a time.. :)
You can talk KG... we understand ;)
I gotta scoot... DD needs breakfast.
Oh.... I may not post every day due to work but I'll check in when I can.
I'm so excited for you !!!
01-03-2010, 11:23 AM
wow!!! how did i miss all this excitement???? nomena - Leenie's the BEST, isn't she??
i'd just like to add a couple more thoughts - first of all, you KNOW that, no matter what you do, your doc isn't going to be happy with your weight loss, but he'll be THRILLED if you tell him what's been happening in your life, and that you've developed a plan to get through this.
the older i get - and the more post-ops i talk with and the longer i live with my bypass - the more i realize that it's the emotional issues that get in our way. They're complicated, and hard, and deeply ingrained in our lives. Unless we start dealing with them differently [without food!] and in healthier ways, we won't be able to change our relationship with food.
sooooo, go see your doc, HOLD YOUR HEAD HIGH, and hand him a list with the challenges you've faced, and what you've done or planning to do with them.
and at the top of the list will be your mom [and the gum/water/side dish solution] and then that old boyfriend [and decide what you're going to try with him]
there's something about old boyfriends - one of mine recently raised his ugly head after nearly 30 years!!!!!! and i STILL don't want to have anything to do with him!!!
glad you're here with us!!!!
01-03-2010, 04:17 PM
YEEEEE, LEENIE is the best!! Thank you Leeniee...
I do agree about our mums - they are great mums! And I let that go and we agree on it so I think will manage somehow. I will not go there hungry :-) and I will go AFTER lunch time so I will have to teach them that I did not come to eat but to see them! :-)
I did decide to incorporate at least one hour a day walking or other activity. I did swim today and I felt energized after it. Also, I do walk to work, almost half an hour in one direction so that is the way I incorporated that in my schedule. Maybe you should do something similar? Or park your car on the half of the way and than walk! Its a good start, I also started like that!!! And look me now!
The physical activity was not a problem to me ever and I think that is the only reason why I am still healthy. I concerned some of the local hills also and I like walking. I grew up at suburbs so I think that is the reason why I don’t drag of walking and activity as most people from the capital city do!
@jiffy, my doc will not be happy :) because I will ruin his statistic about the study he is making :-) but I dont care anymore. He would not have understand my problems because he is another kind of man and he would tell that I am look excuse but I will take a grip until 25th so I hope I will be at least 2 pounds less than the last time. You know - just to show even the smallest effort! In a meantime I operated melanoma so I will play on that card :)
I have decided to go South Beach from tomorrow so I think that will have great effect in short time (not healthy I know) just to jump start.
Also I am still comparing myself and as Lee said I have to stop that because it emotionally ruins me!
Lee, I see that you are moderator, but I did not find how much did you loose in a meantime? If you would like do please keep up with my post :)))) I would be delighted of course!
For the first time I have decided that I will loose ONLY 10 percent of my weight in this year and If I manage that - I would be so happy. I always had "bigger" goals and did not loose even 10 percent. So...my goal is 93 kg from 103 that I have now.
01-03-2010, 07:01 PM
I agree with Jiffy.. hold that head high :D
South beach is great and healthy.. good choice.
I lost 65 lbs but then put back on 30 lbs. I have to learn to forgive myself, and I know what I need to do, I just need to do it. My band is terrific... I just need to train my brain now and get back on track :D
Good luck tomorrow !!!
01-04-2010, 02:16 PM
I do understand you, I also need to forgive myself. I will start from the day after tomorrow, its a holiday and I will have time to shop for the healthy food and try to keep up :)
Lee, how much filing do you have now?
I think that if you did loose it once you can do it again..
01-05-2010, 04:41 PM
Yes, I've done it before 1,000 times and can do it again.. need to hit the do-over button LOL
I have a 4 cc band with 2.75 in it. But I have acid reflux and can not get another fill.. if I do it will make the reflux worse and I'm not going there lol.
Like you said... I can do it !!! ;)
Gotta scoot.. time to go home :D
01-05-2010, 08:39 PM
Hi! I'm new to this website but I've had my band for 2 years. Everyone here is so great and I love reading their advice. As a bandster who has been through the ups and downs of getting good restriction, I just wanted to tell you that it sounds like you don't have enough restriction in your band. That's normal and not your fault.
It can take a while to find your band's "sweet spot"-- it's different for everyone. You are supposed to go in about every month for a small fill until you hit your "sweet spot" fill. Each small fill causes the stomach to swell and gives restriction. As the swelling goes down the restriction loosens. So, you go in for the next fill and wait for the restriction to go away, until it doesn't go away anymore.
I have tested the limits of my band. At one point my band was too full and I couldn't even swallow my own saliva. Fill, fill, unfill, fill... I finally found my sweet spot. So I can also tell you that you can eat around your band when you've reached your sweet spot. To eat a whole sandwich I need to start small with a few chips and water, then it takes me about an hour to eat it all. Then I'm really full, probably stretched my stomach. So, from my personal experiences, it sounds to me like you don't have enough of a fill and your Dr shouldn't have a problem with that-- he is supposed to help you get to your right fill.
You're doing good. Hang in there!
01-06-2010, 03:06 AM
Chatty, I think you are right. Tx God for this forum because in my Country Lap band is a new thing and they dont konw anything really. I have only 2 ml in band of 11 ml, so its empty really. Doc asked me to come one month after surgery and filled me in with 2 ml and thats it. Now I will come 4 months after surgery. Is not that stupid? Sholud not we come every month and fill it ASAP because that is the point not to have an empty lap?
So I become reallly frustrated until I found your comments here and thank you so much. Now I have realized that I have an empty band and that all that are women talkling here is bull****. You cant be restricted with 2ml in 11 ml band. One of tham told me that she did loose 100 pounds in 6 month with an empty band - and I did beleved her. What an idiot I am :)
01-06-2010, 03:22 AM
I have decided to relax a little bit and to try to focus myself until 25th. Than I will ask for a new fill and than try to be as disciplend as I can.
Today I will start South Beach and try to leave carbs out of my plan so will see. I will do my nails at the salon as a motivator. I wanted that for a long time because I have short nails and I realized I cant put myself down all the time and expect good results. So I will try to change my thinking in general to be more positive...
So if you wolud like to join, just jump in :)
01-06-2010, 09:25 AM
GOOD FOR YOU, Nomena!!!!!
01-06-2010, 10:23 AM
Good luck with South Beach Nomena :hug:
01-06-2010, 12:13 PM
Fills are so important for the band to work right. If you go to this page and click on "See Getting Adjustments Testimonial." it will pop up a video about lap band adjustments and how important they are.
There is a lot of good information on the manufacturer's website.
I'm doing the 5 Day pouch test. I just did 2 days of liguids and now I'm on to mushies today. Good luck with the South Beach diet. Hang in there until you get your fill. :hug:
01-07-2010, 01:56 PM
Thank you all! Thx kat for the link and info. I hope I will try 5 day test soon, after he fills me in again :))) Cant wait to fill that thing!
I red my horoscope for this year and it said - you will loose weight and everyone wolud be admired to your look. And no horoscope ever said that. I was delighted :-)
01-07-2010, 07:05 PM
Hi I am Lisa. I was reading about your issues and just wanted to say you have a lot of people rooting for you! I hopefully will get my wls in the spring! I was just curious, what country are you from in Europe? I have been to Italy and Ireland. I loved both!
01-08-2010, 09:01 AM
I hope I will try 5 day test soon, after he fills me in again :)))
Please make sure you follow your doctors orders as what to eat after each fill. I am sure he will let you know, and if he doesn't make sure you ask him. He might want you to do liquids for a day or two or even just a few hours...the main thing is to follow his orders.
After each fill you'll be learning what you can eat and what you can not (tollerate), its really a learning process the first year. Once you go to solid foods after each fill... remember... eat slow, very slow, take small teeny tiny bites and chew chew chew. I can not stress enough how important these steps are.
The 5 day pouch test you can do later on down the road.
How are you doing with South Beach?
01-09-2010, 11:09 AM
HI Lee, tx, you are right. I did start something like South Beach and I feel great. I did mess up today and I will have guests tomorrow but after that - starting again because I feel great and I am not bloated as usuall. I am more optimistic than on the day when I started this topic. Thank you so much!
01-10-2010, 12:16 AM
Your welcome :hug: I am so glad you are feeling better. We are never alone in our struggles.. remember that.
02-05-2010, 11:36 AM
Hi everyone, just to give an update and I need a comment please:
I did have Lap band on 15.09.2010. Month later 15.10. 2009. I did loose around 13 pounds (7 kg). They gave me the first fill - 2ml and the band is big to 11 ml.
Doctor asked me to come 3 months later for check up. Is that not too late?
I gained around half of that i loose in a first month - 7 ponuds (3 kg) and he refused to fill me because he said he will reword me after I loose some weight. I have insisted but he refused saying that I will make my upper stomach bigger if he fills me and that the band will have to be removed than.
I am not sure am I right or not because in Euorpe its quite a new thing so I wolud like a comment from your personal experiance.
- that he should fill me up every month and that 3 months gap is waist of time
- that the band has no purpose as it is empty
- they can take it out because there is no firkin point anyway
- if I could loose it by myself I would do it anyway
- i don’t think i would stretch the upper stomach if he filled me because it wolud have better effect and that I wolud pay more attention
He asked me to come in 6 weeks and I will be lucky if I don’t get some more pounds. I can eat whatever I like, in any quantity almost. (a little bit less, but a little!)
Whot wolud you do if you were me?
I am thinking about finding the another doctore to fill me up every month without telling the first one. It wolud be expensive for me, but isnt this pointless?
02-06-2010, 08:45 AM
- that he should fill me up every month and that 3 months gap is waist of time
- that the band has no purpose as it is empty
- they can take it out because there is no firkin point anyway
- if I could loose it by myself I would do it anyway
- i donít think i would stretch the upper stomach if he filled me because it wolud have better effect and that I wolud pay more attention
I agree with you 100% he should fill you every couple of weeks, 2-3...
A 3 month wait is insane.
Is there any way you could see another doctor... this guy sounds like he doesn't know what he is doing.
02-06-2010, 11:20 AM
Thank you Leeine, you are my angel. I felt so frustrated I cant describe it!!! I asked my self as I am crazy or what??
I have e-maild to one private clinic, they do gastric balloons so I hope they will take me for the fills. I explained the situation and I am hoping for the positive answer!
The doctor is the first one that started that in my town so he is so "proud" of himself that he is making mistakes and feeling as a God. I cant believe that he does not surf the net...and see how its done elsewhere!
Thank you for giving me my mind back :hug: I hope i will find someone else to fill it because - its not so hard. Any good nurse with the big needle can do it, but everyone is afraid I guess...wish me luck!
And I think that after that I will not go back to the crazy doctor or I should and tell him that he is imbecile!
02-11-2010, 04:15 AM
OK, after a few days of hard frustration I got over it :-))) I am starting to take care of what I eat from today and trying to forgot about the crazy doctor. I will have to visit him in 6 weeks and in a meantime try to loose weight. Not because of him, but me. I did not do all that not to have any effect.
In a mentime I am trying to find a clinic that do Lap bands in my town and I have found only ONE. One rejected me becuase thay do only baloons but this one does lap band, so I am hoping for the YES from their side.
Leenie, thank you so much for the support, I really needed that :-)
After some histeric epizode I realised that there is allways a solutin and that I can finde one no metter of that doctor. This is my body and my life and I have to do what is best of me and no metter if he is going to be pist off (and he will be).
02-11-2010, 04:16 AM
I bought a chicken :) and I will eat a lots of proteins today with lettuce! Njami! :)
02-11-2010, 12:41 PM
I am so happy to hear you say this. And I'm happy you are looking to find another place that can help you. YOUR AWESOME !!!
My body, my life ~ I LOVE IT !!!!
Let us know how you make out with the new place and/or the old one and of course keep posting about yourself, we love hearing from you.