100 lb. Club - how do i break the food addiction ..




haleysmommy5402
11-27-2009, 06:59 PM
i feel like i need to go on that show intervention .. i seriously am like addicted to food .. im so disgusted w/ the way i look yet i just cant stop eating .. this probably sounds awful but maybe talking about it will make it more real to me and hopefully help me change .. its just disgusting .. i was up all night thinking about how disgusted i am w/ myself i even woke up at 4am and weighed myself to try and clear my head .. i was down 2 lbs from the last time i weighed so thats a plus .. i think most of the problem is that i dont have my car right now so im not able to go to the gym and i have nothing better to do then be stuck in the house, eat and watch tv .. then to make matters worse tonight a friend and i went to the Hallmark store (my friend had a stillborn birth today wanted to get her a card) well on my way in this guy in the parking lot was screaming FAT GIRL .. FAT GIRL HEEEYYYY FAT GIRL .. granted there were a ton of people in the parking lot so he might not have been necessarily talking to me, but OMG i wanted to just die :( and seeing that im surrounded by people who were my weight loss support and all opted to have weight loss surgery now im left struggling on my own its just so hard :( my 2 closest friends and my mom all had WL surgery and look amazing and here i am still struggling to do what comes easy to them now .. sorry not looking for pity just wanted to vent!!


cathydoe
11-27-2009, 07:10 PM
That is a loaded question. Cuz the response is very deep and at home for me. And I wish I could say...well just like Nike....just do it! If it was that easy, HA!

This site is a great place to read and learn, make new friends and to write what you know. One day at a time. My friends that have had WLS, who believe they are addicted to food, are still struggling with food issues...now they just weigh less. This is one of the reasons why I opted out of the WLS. I still felt I had some in me to conquer the food demons. I am not saying I won't ever have the surgery. For today I know I need to do what I am doing. Peace be with you.

Cathy :)

RMatS
11-27-2009, 07:23 PM
I really can't understand some people! What completely amazes me is that the a-hole who was yelling at someone in the parking lot (who was a complete stranger who had never done anything to him in his life) will actually find a woman who will allow him to reproduce with her.

Don't do anything for him, Girl. Do it for you. I don't know any easy way to beat a food addiction except it seems to get easier as you go along. You have to want to be healthy more than you want that cookie or french fry right now. Just stop and ask yourself if the food is going to change anything or make you happy.

You can do this!


ubergirl
11-27-2009, 07:28 PM
Haley,

Everything you are saying is something that I totally understand. It's an awful feeling when you feel like you are out of control.

I lived for way too many years thinking that I had no power to control myself around food.

I am a binger extraordinaire-- even being the type of person who occasionally binged on stuff that was sort of gross just because nothing else was around.

I ALMOST did WLS. I was scheduled to do it, and I had a date set, but the day before the surgery I got a call that my insurance was requesting some additional documentation of my diet history and so the surgery was postponed.

I decided not to do it, and over the course of the following year, I gained another 20 pounds and reached my all time high....

But, I somehow knew all along that WLS wouldn't be right for me. I had food issues that were inside my head, not my stomach.

So, what happened? I think what changes you is different for every person. For me, I finally saw that there was something I wanted EVEN MORE than food that was within reach for me if only I got the weight off.... I always thought I wanted things-- a cute body, a fit body, nice clothes... but apparently I never wanted them enough.

Now, I know the truth. I had the power to stop all along, but deep down, I really wasn't willing to do what it took-- which was to finally say that as much as I wanted those foods, I was willing to give them up, pretty much forever.

The first two to three weeks were white-knuckle hard-- but since then, not so much. Now, the good feelings about my new lifestyle far outweigh my feelings of sacrifice.

I am entirely confident that I'll reach goal and maintain it. I already made the mental shift. I am not that person any more.

If you are willing to jump in feet first and decide that you are not going to keep eating the stuff that makes you fat-- even if you miss it, and even if you feel like it's calling your name-- then you CAN succeed.

Promise me. If I can, anyone can-- and we are all here to support you.

gardenerjoy
11-27-2009, 07:28 PM
I'm a librarian, so here's a book recommendation :-)

The End of Overeating by David Kessler

It helped me direct some of that anger at the food industry instead of myself (but it didn't put the whole responsibility on someone other than myself, which would also be self-defeating). When I learned all that the food industry has done, quite cynically and deliberately, to foster addiction to high fat, high salt, and high sugar foods, I became determined to show them who was in control of what I put in my body.

ubergirl
11-27-2009, 07:29 PM
I'm a librarian, so here's a book recommendation :-)

The End of Overeating by David Kessler

It helped me direct some of that anger at the food industry instead of myself (but it didn't put the whole responsibility on someone other than myself, which would also be self-defeating). When I learned all that the food industry has done, quite cynically and deliberately, to foster addiction to high fat, high salt, and high sugar foods, I became determined to show them who was in control of what I put in my body.

This book helped me too. A LOT. I highly recommend it.

MissKoo
11-27-2009, 07:32 PM
I totally get what you are saying. I have been under the weather with bronchitis for weeks. Can't work out because I am so short of breath and nothing to do but eat. I've gained back 7 pounds that I had lost before and I feel like a trainwreck! I don't know what else to say but hang in there! I am leaving next Friday to go home for about ten days to see family and I am just dreading it because they heard about my weight loss and I'm afraid they're going to ask "what the heck happened?" Oh, jeez.

Regarding "Hey, fat girl . . ." Unless you're name is acutally "Fat Girl" then they couldn't have been addressing you!

ANewCreation
11-28-2009, 12:00 AM
Honey, you have lost ten pounds and that is AMAZING!

Now as far as addictions go, I can truly relate to what you are saying. I used to feel driven and consumed by my desire for certain foods. I absolutely had no control, I tried, I really did, with no success.

This may be just my personal experience but maybe it will give you some hope. Eating healthy has really turned my life around. I used to eat dessert every night. Couldn't do without it. Had to have it. Now, my sugar cravings have all but disappeared. I credit eating more protein and all but eliminating simple carbohydrates. I had to start eating this way because my doctor told me I was pre-diabetic. As a matter of fact, her words to me were: 'Since you seem to be headed down this path you might as well start eating as if you were a diabetic.' Sounds harsh but she had been telling me for years I needed to lose weight, etc. I paid her no heed until she said those words.

I'm not saying your experience will be like mine or that you even need to eliminate simple carbs. I do believe everyone is different to some degree and what works for one person doesn't for another. I just wanted you to know that I was once one of those people who could not shake the hold food had on me. I encourage you to move forward and continue to find something that does work for you. It's trial and error sometimes but so worth doing. And it does take awhile for it to kick in, but it will kick in eventually!

If I can do this, anyone can! You can get back up every time you fall down. You can. We're here for you.

Arctic Mama
11-28-2009, 01:32 AM
I am not sure my advice would help you - when I am struggling with my diet and exercise, and generally not managing my health properly, I sit down and pray about it. I don't have the strength to do this on my own, I know this, so I acknowledge that while I will fail on my own, I can do anything through my Lord. And quite frankly, since my desire to lose weight is strongly tied to being a more attentive and active wife and mother, I keep finding myself very invigorated after I give over my weakness in this area.

Food addiction, like any addiction, is a struggle to address. But support - be it from a website, a friend, or your faith, is one of the biggest steps to managing your issues.

I really do feel for you, and hope you find some answers. Sometimes just taking the 'fake it 'til you make it' approach for a week can get the ball rolling.

It does get easier with time, but deciding you want it and committing to that course of action are really important to succeeding, right up there with a support network!

bonnnie
11-28-2009, 03:52 AM
Being/feeling bored definitely brings out my food addiction. No doubt.

The answer for me, is to put my mind towards something creative- making art. Even if i am simply making a card for a friend at home.

Also, i have myself on a timer- i eat very small meals made with whole foods every 2-3 hours.... and i drink green tea w/ honey in between. So.... there is still always something in my mouth at all times.

Ready2EnjoyLife
11-28-2009, 04:11 AM
I feel the same way that you feel. I have often wanted to confide in someone that im addicted to food but no one that i know would understand. Im sorry that you are stuggling with this but just know that we both are struggling with the same thing. We will get past this. God bless

megwini
11-28-2009, 05:35 AM
I am not a binge eater and have only had one binge in my life, about 3 months before I started losing weight (and that was part of my wake-up call). I remember going through the entire basement pantry and grabbing whatever I could get my hands on while simultaneously crying because I felt like I couldn't stop, like I didn't have control. I felt helpless and doomed to be fat my entire life.
But that's just the thing... I only had ONE binge. I know many of you have had MANY binges that really haunt you. Just that one binge caused me extreme emotional trauma that's left a big impact on me, so honestly, I respect ANY of you who have a binging problem and are working hard to lose weight. It feels AWFUL to feel out of control, just AWFUL. You feel so helpless. But you know what, I have a very favorite quote, that I try to live my life by....

"The test of a first-rate intelligence is the ability to hold two opposed ideas in the mind at the same time, and still retain the ability to function. One should, for example, be able to see that things are hopeless and yet be determined to make them otherwise."
~F. Scott Fitzgerald

It's that last sentence that really gets to me and is what can really keep me going even when things seem impossible. I guess I can't offer much advice, as I am not in your shoes, but I can still do my best to support you on your weight loss journey! Good luck! Just keep trying and you WILL get there in the long run!

rockinrobin
11-28-2009, 06:11 AM
i seriously am like addicted to food .. im so disgusted w/ the way i look yet i just cant stop eating

The first step IMO, is recognizing, acknowledging and owning up to the fact that you CAN stop eating. By saying that you can't, it's giving yourself permission TO. You must, must, must realize that of course you CAN stop eating in this manner. It is within your power, your control. You DO hold the key. No one. No one is forcing that food down your mouth. It IS your choice.

For many years I too didn't believe that I had the control over it. And that was nonsense and a poor excuse. I had the control the whole time. The whole time. I had the power to make it stop. I finally realized this, finally realized that I didn't have to be fat if I didn't want to be. Period. I was the one putting all that food in my mouth, I was the one that COULD STOP putting that food in my mouth.

How do you break the cycle? You DECIDE to. You decide that you're just not going to live that way anymore. Require more from yourself. Raise your standards. DECIDE to lose the weight once and for all and permanently. Decide to do it. Commit to do it and then it shall happen. Because you've decided to and committed to. It's at that point that you MAKE it happen. You do whatever it takes, whatever is necessary.

And then you set yourself up for success. Make a plan and stick to it no matter what. No matter what. You must work through that initial discomfort of learning new habits and behaviors. Make a plan. Make a plan. Make a plan. Eating healthy and losing weight wont' happen on it's on. You've got to make it happen. You've got to set the wheels in motions. You've got to map out your food schedule in advance. No more leaving your food up in the air. Journaling is also an extremely effective tool. You bite it you write it. Every bite, lick, taste, crumb, morsel. Rid the house of the junk. Completely. ADD in healthy, low cal, nutritious foods. PAck up your foods, take them with you. Always, always, always know where your next meal/snack is coming from. Make this a top priority. Make it your job, your mission. Make yourself some definite food rules/laws/boundaries to stick to.

For me, being the food addict that I was/am, that meant definite NO's. They were a definite must for me. I completely banned many food items - the ones I loved the most and overate the most. I was done being fat and was no longer willing to take a chance that they would derail me. I had a hard time stopping with many foods - my solution - dont' start. Like any addict, you give me one taste and I want more and more and more. You leave that door ajar and I swung it open, every time. Miraculously so, upon giving up my favorite foods, my desire for them decreased. The longer I went without them, the less I wanted them. It may seem extreme to some, but I needed something extreme to happen. I too was moments away from WLS. My life was on the line and the life of my children's mother. IT WAS THE BEST THING I'VE EVER DONE! I should have done it years and years earlier.

Losing weight is a doable thing, make no mistake about it. For everyone and anyone - yourself included. I am CERTAIN of it. There is no doubt in my mind in fact. DECIDE to do this. DECIDE. :hug:

dragonwoman64
11-28-2009, 09:00 AM
I can completely relate to your feelings.

you've gotten lots of good advice here. there have been many threads about food addiction you might want to search out and read, you're not alone with that issue at all. people do overcome it/manage it, so you know it can be done. there are emotional parts to it, biological parts, and just plain bad habits that get hard to break.

I agree about the environment 100 percent. don't have the temptation around you. and if you have your meals for the day planned and ready, you can go on automatic. it's work in the beginning. being at home might help you, you can solidify your habits in a place you have more control over.

I didn't join a gym until I got to 260. I walked in my neighborhood and I did exercises at home. Sidebends, crunches, leg lifts, marching in place. Lots of people here do videos/DVDs (you can check them out at the library if you don't want to buy them).

the last thing I would say is please don't beat yourself up. you are strikingly pretty. I don't know you, but I'm sure you have a long list of things about you that are special and unique, that people around you love you for. you are not just your body. that said, your body does need to be taken care of, treated with kindness and love, because you depend on it to exist, ha. making and keeping it healthy will help you mentally and physically to have a better quality of life and to contribute more fully to the lives and world around you.

never give up. you are worth the work.

Violet73
11-28-2009, 10:35 PM
I too have this problem sometimes (sigh).....hopefully with a new start here and determination, I can change those ways .....cant wait until I am able to give advice here and be a success story :)

Trazey34
11-29-2009, 01:33 PM
I'm just glad you're addressing this NOW... for myself, I didn't get a handle on things until i was 40 years old. For me, the 1st step was literally the first step. I finally looked myself in the mirror and said enough with the excuses, put on a pair of ratty old sneakers and went for a walk. Now, it was 1/2 a block and I thought I was gonna die, but it was a start. It was a start of a lot of conversations with myself, of honestly coming clean and admitting to myself that I did NOT want to die. Sure, i want nicer smaller clothes, to look cute blah blah blah but that's not enough to motivate me or i would have done it when i was 25. No, DYING is motivating LOL and one little walk turned into having fruit salad instead of ice cream, which lead to a tuna salad on greens for lunch instead of a double cheeseburger and so on and so on.

I was never one to binge on food, just constantly graze and enjoy. Like Robin said, I had to stop saying "I CANT HELP IT" which basically gave me permission for years to stuff my face, to YES I CAN HELP IT!!! we're awesome and smarter than FOOD so yes we can help it :)

haleysmommy5402
11-30-2009, 09:04 PM
Thank you ladies for all of your advice .. I've taken everything everyone of you has said to me all in .. I have decided to make a change it will be hard but the end result will be worth it .. tonight was the final straw .. i took my kids to get Christmas pictures and i purposely asked if i could get a picture done w/ them .. and sure enough i HATED the person i seen .. but that big ole 5x7 will go right on my fridge and will be my constant reminder EVERY TIME i go to that fridge that i need to make the choice to eat healthy rather then unhealthy .. my mom went w/ me and on the way there i said next year it'll be my picture being passed around and everyone saying WOW look how much weight Julia has lost since last Christmas (this year it was my mom .. shes lost 50 lbs w/ the help of the lap band) Thanks again ladies .. you all are amazing :)

CLCSC145
11-30-2009, 09:21 PM
Aw, Julia, your posts broke my heart because I've felt what you're feeling. I'm a binge eater and the lack of control that eating compulsively makes you feel is nearly unbearable, but the pull toward food amazingly still is stronger. But trust me, you can break the cycle. Just take baby steps - identify your trigger foods and cut them out, then maybe focus on your food first, and layer on exercise once the food doesn't feel so overwhelming. Also, think about what emotions or situations set you off to eat when you aren't hungry and start coming up with other ways to address those times that don't involve food. As a parent, you wouldn't let your kids do something that would harm them, so don't forget that sometimes we need to do a little self-parenting (it's that inner whinny toddler we all have that says, "but I want it!"). Tell yourself no when necessary and mean it. You do it enough and the rules you set for yourself become easier to follow when you realize you're not going to let yourself get away with self-destructive behavior anymore.

You can be the success story everyone is talking about next year, and better yet, think of how good you'll feel to know you were responsible for that feeling! You can do this...

LesliesMom
12-01-2009, 10:51 AM
Julia -

Good for you for getting those pictures done with your kids, and you are right, you will look fabulous in your picture next year. Sometimes we need to see a visual to get moving.

Good Luck -

Angie

ladyrider72472
12-01-2009, 11:56 AM
I would recommend the book that the others recommend..... but if you want to know the short version of it--- what Rockn'Robin said is it. (Minus the food industry part).

I am almost finished with the book..... and it is a great read. A bit scientific at times, but overall a great read. I am a binger too.... it is helping me!