Calorie Counters - Went off track.. binged.. depressed

Well, today was our Halloween party at work. I hope all of you control yourself better than I did.
I have had my mind made up all week that I would most likely call in to avoid it... but I woke up this morning and thought if I run from my problems they will never be solved.. I need to face all the food and prove to myself that I can do it.
Well, that didn't happen.
One of my coworkers and close friends knows my past with dieting. I have been dieting since I was around 13 years old. So today I was telling her that I was not eating the food and I brought my own snacks and lunch. And she said, "Honey, you have been doing this for a long time. I think it's about time you give up." Well, I went into the bathroom and cried... it hurt me so much... I felt like SUCH a failure. Emotions kicked in which is my biggest binge trigger and I ate and ate and ate. I was so sick by my one-hour lunch break that I had to go into our break room and nap on the couch. I slept the entire hour, felt better, so what did I do? I came up and ate and ate and ate. I sit here at my desk with my fourth cup of soda, second piece of pumpkin pie, candy wrappers hidden in my garbage and a stomach as hard as a rock from all of the fudge, candy, pie, buffalo dip, mac and cheese, chips, etc....
I just feel like such a failure....

LISTEN the first thing you have to do is forgive yourself for this little hiccup. It will be far worse if you let this bump in the road derail you completely.

It's done, over, you can't change it. So what? Don't give up and cut yourself a little slack. YOU ARE HUMAN!!! Just move past this and keep up the good work. YOU CAN AND WILL DO THIS AND SO CAN I!!!!

GOOD LUCK!!!

I'm so sorry that happened :( I hope you realize that you're not a failure. It's so hard to do this. I just started, and I'm sure I'll have a moment like that too.

But I can't tell you how angry I am at your co-worker. :mad: I can't believe she spoke to you like that!

The only advice I can offer is the little diddy I play through my head when I have trouble...Dory from Findind Nemo..."Just keep swimming, just keep swimming!" Just keep on going :) *huggs*

I'm so sorry your co-worker said that to you! That was nasty whether intended or not. You are not what other people say to you or think about you. The best thing you can do is to remember always to be good to yourself and that means to stay on your eating plan. Forgive yourself please? You are a worthwhile person.:hug:

Sweetie, your co-worker just sounds ignorant. And bless her (very) little heart - she may be the *blip* in your food journey that is already pushing you toward treating yourself better. Poor thing, you know she will be DUMBfounded when (not if) you reach your goal. :carrot:

This is indeed a hiccough, a brief tumble into the dust of old habits. It is past. Times like this, we get to be reminded that excessive eatings doesn't bring us the good feelings we're after. Now, please don't amplify all this and go beating yourself up. Love what everyone else has offered here - in agreement with Starzmom who said: "The best thing you can do is to remember always to be good to yourself and that means to stay on your eating plan."

How about a real holiday celebration. What nice thing can you do for yourself (non-food related) this weekend to celebrate this beautiful season?

NBaxter... first of all.... :hug: I won't be as nice as some of the other posters about your co-worker. She was a total B-I-T-C-.... you know the last letter!

Now sweetie... pick yourself up, dust yourself off, and go buy or rent or borrow THE BECK DIET SOLUTION, and learn how to turn off those nasty sabotaging thoughts that lead you to "give up".... you will learn ways to combat such insensitive statements, how to truly say "No thanks!" to the foods that make you hate yourself, and you will learn HOW to diet (you pick any diet you choose! BECK just helps you find your motivation & YOUR mojo to get it done!)

OH! - and please feel free to join us in the General Diet Plans & Questions section.

I cannot praise this book enough, and I am feeling so much better about my diet now. I am learning techniques that truly help me stay on track.

So ... Chin up honey! - cause EVERYDAY'S A NEW DAY! And you CAN do this! :sunny:

Hugs! Don't think of this as the end. think of NOW as getting back on track again. You can do it!

I'm so sorry that you feel like a failure-because you are not. I have to say that, although she may be your friend, what your coworker said to just made me so mad! That is not supportive at all!

Just pick up your boot straps and keep on going! We all flub up. The important thing and the coolest characteristic is the ability to get up after you fall. (((HUGS)))

oh sweetie...I know exactly how you feel...but this person that is your friend instead of weigh you down should have supported your decicion and as a friend joined you in your mission...It very hard to feel as if your doing it all on your own and that no one sees your effort and especially if they are not supporting you...what is done is done is done so you had a binge attack well why dont we grab our sneakers and headout for a walk or maybe go to the gym I have noticed on your ticker that your doing such a wonderful job and one day will not destroy that tower so rebuild it show this friend of your that she and most importantly yourself that you can do it...and nexttime wish them all a happy halloween and take your lunch at the park where you well be in wonderful harmony...:hug::hug::hug::hug:

The nice thing about being a calorie counter is that you really can't fail. So....my suggestion? Do your best to honestly count your calories for today. Try to remember all that you ate, and honestly count it. It is what it is; counting it or not counting it doesn't change what you ate. So if it were me, I would just count it. Observe the number, and observe whether or not it fits into your plan. The number will be higher than you had planned for today, but it's just that--a number. You can observe it and then move on and plan to do better tomorrow.

Eating more than you had planned does not make you a failure. It simply means that you are a calorie counter who ate more than her planned allotment of calories for today. It doesn't say anything about you as a person, whether or not you are good or bad, failure or success.

Record it. Observe it. Determine whether or not today fits into your plans. Plan strategies to deal with next time; for instance, eat your planned snacks and meals, but allow for a piece of pumpkin pie. And then move on, because tomorrow is another opportunity to be on plan and to move towards success!

I am so sorry you are sad :-( I know in the begining when I made it to week 1 of calorie counting I was sooo happy and my husband looked at me and said "I am surprised it lasted a week... I highly doubt it will last another. This fad of yours will be like every other diet you have tried" well tomorrow is the end of week 5! I have lost nearly 13lbs (not offically yet until tomorrow morning haha) and I have proved him wrong! When people put me down I turn it around and want to make THEM EAT their words!

You are not a failure... a failure would have been like "Oh well forget it TOTALLY" and not have even posted this or felt bad for doing it!

I agree with everyone else that says learn form your mistake and move all. Well all make mistakes and slip up every once and a while but the "winners" or "losers" I guess in the terms of weight haha are the ones that slip up, do well the next day and maybe go on a long walk to make up for that slip up!


Good luck and keep up the hard work!!!

Thank you all so much for your support! This coworker of mine is actually the friend who had to leave weight watchers when we joined together because she became pregnant. Now, don't get me wrong, I love her dearly... but looking back, I think she's jealous. She has taken complete advantage of being pregnant and not being judged for what she is eating. She has gained so much weight, too much to be honest, the past 7 months and she is going to have a real difficult time after her daughter is born.
That being said, I do believe she knows that and is trying to sabotage me. Well it isn't going to work and today I am back on my plan!
Again, thank you for your continued support... xoxoxoxo

wow, what a totally heartless thing to say. I would have NEVER said that. I would have said--how about having some small portions--that way you don't feel deprived.

I would never tell anyone 'just give up'.

I agree, don't let this episode derail you. I understand what it is like to gorge on 10,000 calories at a time in the throes of an emotional binge. The thing is...that is over--you can't undo it--I mean you can UNDO the weight damage, but not the act itself. so hang in there.

Let that motivate you. People don't seem to think you can because you have been fighting it so long. So show them you can.

Big hugs to you. Don't try to "make up" for your mistake...just get back on plan and keep going.

It kind of seems like you are blaming your coworker for your binge. She didn't force feed you did she? Seems like that first bite was totally your own decision. She might have said, (DID SAY) something that was uncalled for, but if you were not looking for an excuse to binge, her comment would have meant nothing to you...maybe even gave you a good laugh. We have probably all binged at one time or another but the real healing comes from owning up to it and knowing why it really happened....because you wanted to eat. Period. I only say this because I was formerly the queen of denial and excuses. I blamed more than one person for my obesity and my binges, but when I finally realized that it was ALL MY OWN doings, and that I ate myself to morbid obesity all by myself, was I able to heal myself. You were hurt, you didn't want to feel the hurt, so you tried to stuff the feelings down. Unfortunately it just doesn't help. It's a vicious cycle.

Hang in there. Put this behind you.

Lori Bell,
I am not at all blaming her for my binge! I 100% know it was my doing and my choice. But I will say, I was not looking for an excuse to binge! I brought my own meals and snacks and walked in there 100% motivated and proud that I would turn it all down. Like I said, I was going to call in, but I knew I had to face it and overpower it. Unfortunately, because of my own weakness, I did not do that! But I will say, if she would not have said that & I didn't get so emotional that I lost control, I most likely would not have binged. I can't say I wouldn't have because I don't know, I wasn't given that opportunity. I am an emotional eater and it was a trigger. I lost control, which was my fault, but my reasons for losing control were not. I know I need to work on that and not let others get to me... it is a battle I have faced for the past 10 years.

Thank you for your response. :)

Your coworker is a butthead!

One day of eating like that has not done permanent damage. Brush yourself off and go on! Also, in the future, give yourself permission to enjoy a day like that. You ate all those yummy treats and hated every second of it, right? Next time, enjoy every bite. Taste all the flavors! It's not worth it if you're not going to enjoy it. (((HUG)))

I binged as well. DH got told saturday that he'll have no job to go to on monday. and neither will all his co-workers. we have no idea what we're going to do. I've yet to find a job. I guess I'm just picking myself up and dusting myself off. I'll have to get used to being hungry.

Thanks for the support ladies!

RN, I am so sorry about the job situation! One of my friends who is expecting in January just found out that her husband will be unemployed in 2 weeks. It's such a terrible time!
Will your DH be able to collect unemployment so you can squeeze by for a little while?
I know it is tough... My DH was unemployed for 6 months and we had to take out retirement and move in with my parents to survive.
There is so much federal aid out there, I have confidence everything will be ok!

Hang in there. Weight loss is not a race. You had a slip-up and now get back on track and prove to yourself (and your coworkers) that you can and will do this. Everyone makes mistakes but what separates the winners from the losers is the ability to pick oneself up and try again. I have been there before and I actually had to avoid social situations and dining out for the first part of my weight loss journey because I lacked the willpower at the time to resist at the party or I would eat nothing there and then come home and binge.
Keep going and post here daily to keep yourself accountable.

I came on just now because I am feeling frustrated with my kids, the cold, my diet, and just in general everything. I think what started that was a tiny little 1 lb gain. I do understand that we don't lose everyday and this is no big deal, but all the same my emotions were up. Your post helped me. Thank you for being honest about very common, but yet so personal, moments.

Wow. Your coworker sounds to me like she is jealous of your integrity and/or ignorant. I know she's your close friend, but it might be time to distance yourself from her a little. If I were in your shoes, I would tell her frankly and calmly that my well being depends on my success, and that I need her support, not her snide remarks.

My favorite coworker comment was: "I see you eating so healthy, so why are you still fat? Are you pigging out when you get home?"

My response? "It took years to build this fat up, it will take years to get it off again." Then I ran off and cried on my break, lol.

People are thoughtless and ignorant, and you can't let them trip you up or hold you back, honey. You are doing something wonderful and healthy for yourself. Try to take her comments to a positive place. Get ANGRY and more resolved because of them. You will SHOW her. Just wait.