Weight Loss Support - Ugh, I'm NOT happy with myself!




View Full Version : Ugh, I'm NOT happy with myself!


lunameower
10-25-2009, 12:03 AM
Okay, so, I feel almost like I'm a psych patient who was feeling good when they were on their meds, but then went off because they felt good and can't understand why they don't feel good anymore.
I was doing really well, I'd lost fifteen pounds, I was in a good routine, I was feeling great. I'd spend a decent amount of time on here because I liked seeing other people's stories and because since I don't really have anyone to talk to at home I felt like I had people that I could bond with, but then things started to go south. I stopped coming on here as much because I was doing great so I thought that I didn't support, but I was still going to Weight Watchers, but then my boyfriend, Shaun, lost his job and I had to stop going to WW for financial reasons.
That was a little over a month ago, he's still looking for job and depression hit me pretty hard, so, of course, I went for the junk food, I went nuts, and when I didn't see the scale moving up too quickly, I thought, "hey, I'm not gaining that much, so..." yeah, it wasn't pretty. I also stayed away from here because I felt like a failure, even though I knew that the majority of people on here go through the same thing all of the time, but I felt so ashamed, I was, and well, still am, at my lowest weight since high school, I felt great, I mean, my headaches were gone, I didn't feel bloated, things were moving along in the bathroom (no pun intended).
Anyway, yesterday I just felt so disgusted with my behavior, that scale was really glaring at me, I just can't keep doing this, in the past few weeks I have had horrible headaches, my stomach feels like a marching band is practicing for homecoming, it has to stop.
Yeah, I'm under a lot of stress, with Shaun losing his job we are in a rough place, but our parents are helping out, he has an interview this week, cross the old fingers, but eating this way has made things even worse, I just can't keep doing this.
Okay, well, thanks for listening, or reading, whatever, thanks.


better health3
10-25-2009, 12:06 AM
Sending hugs. Most of us have been there at one time or another. Exercise helps the depression. Good luck.

lunameower
10-25-2009, 12:10 AM
Thank you, and yeah, you're right exercise does help with that, frankly of all the stuff that is good for me, DOES make me feel better, but I just go back to the old ways, gotta keep on trucking.


Havisham
10-25-2009, 12:12 AM
Hang in there, as better health says we've all been there. I think self disgust probably brought a lot of us here. I know I get a lot of support from coming here....and I'm happy to return the favour if I can!

A friend of mine always says, 'this too shall pass'....and it always does. :)

LotusMama
10-25-2009, 12:13 AM
Luna--I have been there before. You had a rhythm going and it was working well. You can get that back. Get back on the wagon and promise yourself you will allow yourself to have one good day and then build on it from there.

I am pulling for you!

Cheers,

J

lunameower
10-25-2009, 12:17 AM
Yeah, that's good advice, I will allow myself one good day and build on that, I usually do the opposite, you know, the old, I'll start doing better tomorrow, we all know how that works.