Weight Loss Support - Should I eat the cake?




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owensmommy4
10-23-2009, 10:56 PM
On Sunday my sister is having a b-day party for my nephew who just turned 1 year old. I am just getting back on the WL after a stall and I am worried that If I eat the cake it will throw me back into eating junk and binges. It seems that once I get off track I really have a hard time getting back on. I do have the extra 35 WW points for the week that I have not ate, so it's not a matter of having the extra to do it with, I'll still be within my points range. I just don't want to get off track again. So I'm not convinced that the cake is worth it.


cheerios
10-23-2009, 10:58 PM
eat the cake but just have a small slice =) don't wanna drive yourself crazy cause you didn't have some and have fun at the party

misskimothy
10-23-2009, 11:07 PM
Sounds like you don't want to eat it. Which is perfectly awesome. But remember that this won't be the only time you'll have to refuse food because life happens. And this is what the 35 extra points are for. So maybe this is the time to show yourself that you CAN work within the WW plan and deal with those life experiences that are gonna come around almost every month. And remember that you are on WW which plans for this. Others may say that "being thin tastes better than the cake" and blah blah blah. But only YOU will know how you want to live your life and only YOU will have to deal with the cake the day after the party. So decide on how you want to live and just LIVE. If this includes cake on special occasions and you can account for it, you can do it within the plan. If you want to give up the cake and special occasion foods, that's perfectly OK too. Just, live the way you want to live. Be consistent. The numbers will take care of themselves.


Tai
10-23-2009, 11:31 PM
Even though you have the points for it, it sounds like it might be a trigger for you. At this point it might be a bit safer to skip it.

Have fun at your nephews birthday party. It's always so cute to watch a one year old eat their birthday cake!

kaybelle9
10-23-2009, 11:58 PM
perhaps skip the cake and spend the points on something else at the party that's not such a trigger... ice cream maybe? Although I do agree with misskimothy that the whole point of WW is to learn how to control your eating in real life situations.

caitybates
10-24-2009, 12:06 AM
right now im on a diet that has room for indulgences in moderation and ive never been more successful at losing weight. i know it's personal for everyone but i used to be dead convinced that only 'perfect' days counted but when i didnt learn to have more feasible goals i found it made weightloss about 100 million times more difficult. skinny people eat cake. for me life without cake would be sad, so now i have a small slice. then again its really important to do what works for you. im just letting you know i really really thought for the longest time the only way i could lose weight was by being perfect for months and months and months until i got to my goal weight. that didnt work for years and years and now im on the most lax diet ive ever been on and the weight is coming off fast but its coming off at a rate of about 2 pounds per week and its like NO effort on my part.

VernDern
10-24-2009, 12:20 AM
I think the key here is MODERATION except if you think even a tiny tiny peice will lead you to a binge.

If you dont think you can handle it dont eat it. Just block it out of your head. I always let loose a little for special occassions but even though it is a special occasion you and only you know your limits.

Enjoy the birthday!

garnetrising
10-24-2009, 01:00 AM
Everything in moderation. I say, yes, have a small piece of cake. And that's the key - small. Especially since your typical piece of cake is not a single serving but multiple. XD

Jinksie
10-24-2009, 01:25 AM
im wondering also... my brithday is coming up and the inlaws always get a cake.. but they know i wont eat it... hmmm

Heather
10-24-2009, 01:46 AM
If I have one piece of cake I will then want to eat 100. It's a trigger for me. Unless I ate the last piece of cake... but then I might want more sweet foods anyway.
If you're like me, don't eat the cake.

rockinrobin
10-24-2009, 01:56 AM
I really don't believe in "anything in moderation". Many people just can't "do moderation". Just any any alcoholic or crack addict. Or me - a sugar "addict". One small shot (or even a sip) can send someone right off the wagon. There are some things that are better left untouched. It is waaay easier to not start at all, then to start and have to stop. I wouldn't think it's worth the risk. There's just too much at stake.

It sounds to me like you've already made up your mind, which is a good thing. I think you're just looking for confirmation that this is an acceptable thing. And it is. It really, really is! I think it would be a wise move on your part.

ESPECIALLY given you are just starting back on the WL scene again. There's a time and a place for everything and right now, your job, your mission is to get rid of the weight. I believe it's not worth taking the chance that it can trigger days and days of "bad" eating. The first couple of weeks ARE difficult and it is essentially a detox period as you try to wean yourself from your former "bad" habits and eating patterns.

For me, it's always best to decide my stategy BEFORE I get to the event/party. This way there is no thinking about it when I get there. I've made my plan, made my decision and then I don't have to contemplate should I?/shouldn't I?.

I'll also just add, that I have never, ever not even one single tiny time, ever regretted NOT eating something. There's no shortage of mediocre (or excellent) cake in this world. It will always be there. At a later date. That self-control feeling in and of itself, never mind the weight loss, but just that wonderful self-control/discipline feeling is MARVELOUS.

Every time I said no to one of "those foods", I was saying yes to a healthier, slimmer, happier ME. And that feels wonderful. No deprivation what so ever. The deprivation is eating that stuff and remaining fat.

mateosmama2005
10-24-2009, 03:24 AM
U sound just like me...I would avoid It, when I'm doing really good, and say "okay just this time" I always want more.and more! Just avoid it if you can!

owensmommy4
10-24-2009, 08:07 AM
Thanks everyone! I know for me that once I have been without sweets for about a week that I no longer crave them and I know that from past experience that I can usually eat a small piece of cake, but then later I will be wanting more or something else and then that leads to the sugar binges. I do OK if I stick with sugar free items, like the SF pudding or jello. My family knows that I'm on WW so it wont be a suprise if I dont eat the cake, but I also know that most of my family are overwieght and think that I dont need to loose weight. I think I will take a SF pudding with me and eat that, that way I am still eating something that is like a treat and will ward off the evil cake! Maybe I am just thinking about this too much!

KDuffer
10-24-2009, 08:47 AM
I realize that right now you are focused on losing weight and best course may be to not eat any cake since there is a high likelihood that it may lead to a binge later on.

However, you should also consider that it will not be necessarily practical (or fun) to avoid having cake (or any particular foods) for the rest of your life. At least for me, having this list of can eat and cannot eat foods, although it may help me lose weight, ultimately cause me to fail when it came to maintenance since I never learned to deal with my eating problems (I only avoided as best as I could). So, at some point I would feel like I am "no longer on a diet" and start eating the "cannot eat" foods, which will take me down my old paths.

In some ways, it's better to start learning how to deal with our particular eating patterns and eating certain things in moderation (within reason). So, from that perspective, I would say, have a small piece of cake within your points and deal with it--maybe brush your teeth as soon as you come home so you won't feel like eating any more or go to bed earlier. For me, learning how to eat like a normal person came with practice. It was hard in the beginning but got easier over time.

rockinrobin
10-24-2009, 09:23 AM
However, you should also consider that it will not be necessarily practical (or fun) to avoid having cake (or any particular foods) for the rest of your life. At least for me, having this list of can eat and cannot eat foods, although it may help me lose weight, ultimately cause me to fail when it came to maintenance since I never learned to deal with my eating problems (I only avoided as best as I could). So, at some point I would feel like I am "no longer on a diet" and start eating the "cannot eat" foods, which will take me down my old paths.

In some ways, it's better to start learning how to deal with our particular eating patterns and eating certain things in moderation (within reason). So, from that perspective, I would say, have a small piece of cake within your points and deal with it--maybe brush your teeth as soon as you come home so you won't feel like eating any more or go to bed earlier. For me, learning how to eat like a normal person came with practice. It was hard in the beginning but got easier over time.

Fun? No fun passing up on some mediocre birthday cake? Ooooh, I disagree. The year I was losing weight (& still) nothing was more fun then passing up on those foods. Nothing felt as good as being in control - finally. I loved that I was manipulating that scale (my body). Fun? Seeing that scale drop, seeing my size plummet, having added energy and stamina and confidence - now THAT was fun.

Some people can't deal with moderation. That's not a crime. Certain foods send me into a feeding frenzy. Like I said earlier, just ask any alcoholic. Should an alcoholic just have a few sips of that vodka, so that he can have some "fun"? One really has to define their own fun, don't they? Why does having fun have to be dependent on eating some cake? I think one has to learn how to have FUN while adhering to a healthy lifestyle. And now that I'm wearing size 4's and smaller, having my eating firmly in check, gained back my self-respect and self-confidence, I'm first having FUN. No, eating that stuff never provided me with fun or happiness or security or peace or calmness. Things that I've GAINED from NOT eating certain foods. Who wouldv'e thunk it.

As for eating like a normal person? No thank you. The majority of people are overweight and obese. Nope. I don't need to be "normal".

I eat carefully, mindfully and maturely. Passing up on certain things is okay. Really it is. And what are you passing up on? SUGAR, FAT? Certainly no nutrients. For many people brushing their teeth is not going to stop the cravings that can last for days on end.

As far as maintenance, I've been maintaining a 165 lb loss now for almost 2 1/2 years now, using these strategies. It's not difficult. It's enjoyable. Fun, in fact!

We all have to find out what works for us - and what doesn't.

Havisham
10-24-2009, 09:44 AM
I realize that right now you are focused on losing weight and best course may be to not eat any cake since there is a high likelihood that it may lead to a binge later on.

However, you should also consider that it will not be necessarily practical (or fun) to avoid having cake (or any particular foods) for the rest of your life. At least for me, having this list of can eat and cannot eat foods, although it may help me lose weight, ultimately cause me to fail when it came to maintenance since I never learned to deal with my eating problems (I only avoided as best as I could). So, at some point I would feel like I am "no longer on a diet" and start eating the "cannot eat" foods, which will take me down my old paths.

In some ways, it's better to start learning how to deal with our particular eating patterns and eating certain things in moderation (within reason). So, from that perspective, I would say, have a small piece of cake within your points and deal with it--maybe brush your teeth as soon as you come home so you won't feel like eating any more or go to bed earlier. For me, learning how to eat like a normal person came with practice. It was hard in the beginning but got easier over time.

I'd agree 100% with this - life isn't about never being able to have the stuff you love. We FC's just need to learn moderation, and balance. If you're doing the balance thing - which you obviously are - then a little taste of something yummy is not an issue. The control comes with just having a little.

You can do this!

Lori Bell
10-24-2009, 10:00 AM
Totally agree with Robin on the moderation thing. I'll tell you, I have 3, count them THREE addictions. Food, (my first true love), alcohol, and cigarettes. I gave up all 3 and there is no way in heck I can have a beer and a cigarette and stop...If I had one beer and a cigarette to "have fun" because I'm "human", I'd be back to drinking a 6 pack of Budweiser every night and smoking a pack/day by the very NEXT day. The same goes with sugary/carby food. I have passed on lots of Birthday cakes in the last 19 months, and I'm at goal and feel great. I don't feel any less human by not eating it...However, I have decided to try the moderation thing as well (on several occasions). I once again tried having a small piece of dessert at a funeral just a week and 1/2 ago, and it sent me into one of the worst binges I can remember, I certainly did not feel human before/during/or after the event. I felt like an addict. I'm still working on losing the weight I gained from an hour of madness that happened 10 days ago. I totally can't do sugar. I know it, I fight it, and I lose every time I try to challenge it.

rockinrobin
10-24-2009, 10:12 AM
I'd agree 100% with this - life isn't about never being able to have the stuff you love. We FC's just need to learn moderation, and balance. If you're doing the balance thing - which you obviously are - then a little taste of something yummy is not an issue. The control comes with just having a little.

You can do this!

But what if you've discovered OTHER things that are yummy? That don't send you into a tailspin? What's wrong with that? What if you've discovered that your former "yummy" foods make you crazed and super morbidly obese and risk your life? What if you're idea of "yummy" has changed? What if you your idea of what you love the most has changed? What's wrong with that? What if you've discovered foods that you LOVE and that LOVE you back? Some people will always have issues with certain foods. So be it.

The OP specifically expressed concerns about her eating that cake and it sending her into overeating for the days that followed. If this is her strategy, why is she not entitled to that? Why would we convince her of anything different? :dunno:

TXMary2
10-24-2009, 10:17 AM
I am counting calories so if it was me I would eat 1 serving of cake and count it. I would eat it slowly in small bites and savor it. I have been doing that with most of my food because one of my problems over the years is inhaling my food and not really tasting it. It helps. Eating slower gives your stomach time to tell your brain you have had enough to eat. Enjoy a small slice of cake and keep moving forward. However, if you think/know it would trigger you and make you want to eat everything in sight then don't do it. For me, I just know if I "deny" myself some enjoyable foods that NOT eating them sets me up for a binge because I feel deprived.

Heather
10-24-2009, 10:19 AM
It seems to me that 2 viable options are being presented:

1) eat the cake if you want it, moderation is okay
2) don't eat the cake, especially if it will trigger cravings for other sweet foods and make you go off plan for a while.

I think both of these are reasonable choices, and now the OP gets to decide which one she wants. I'm not sure more discussion on the matter is really going to help.