Body Image and Issues after Weight Loss - Confession about post-weight loss image

I have a confession: I often think people looked better (face wise at least) in their "Before" pictures.

Sometimes I actually think that women look prettier and YOUNGER with the fuller face than after they lose the weight.

Am I crazy? Or are there others?

No way..I like my own face MUCH better thinner..I was afraid of aging but just the opposite happened--I look ten years younger..I think most every post here does

I agree with you, amkenkent! Totally agree.

I have a confession: I often think people looked better (face wise at least) in their "Before" pictures.

Sometimes I actually think that women look prettier and YOUNGER with the fuller face than after they lose the weight.

Am I crazy? Or are there others?

youre not crazy I think what it is. is that when a person loses lots of weight they look drawn and sunk in but after they maintain the weight loss for while their faces tend to level out does that make sence?

I think some do and some don't. Mostly I think, so?

its like a 300 lb person drops 150 lbs in a year you figure all the internal organs and everything have to rearrainge themselves to fit in a smaller person. so why not the face instead of hanging on plump fat cheeks its hanging from skinny cheek bones. it just takes time to level out thats all.

I definitely see the lines on my face much better with it slimmer. My nail tech told me a few months ago "You need to stop losing weight, it is making your face look so old!" She then told me how great the rest of me looked, so I had to take the good with the bad. :rofl:

in younger people it tends to make them look older , i think

and vise versa for older people

but for the most part i do agree most of the posters ive seen here where prettier facially in the before pictures

hopefully as someone said it levels out

i never said anything cause i figured id sound nuts ... lol

its like a 300 lb person drops 150 lbs in a year you figure all the internal organs and everything have to rearrainge themselves to fit in a smaller person. so why not the face instead of hanging on plump fat cheeks its hanging from skinny cheek bones. it just takes time to level out thats all.

does it eventually? in everyone/most people?

Ummm...for the most part I think the person looks younger in their after pictures so maybe I'm the odd ball here :lol: (I'm looking in the mirror now and see no droopy jowls after losing 140lbs in 17 months either...*scratches head*)

In some cases, the before pictures *are* significantly younger.

But, I agree that facial fat *can* make people look younger. But IMO, that's not the same thing as prettier! I do think it takes a while for skin to retract as much as it can (eat your healthy fats, everyone!) and that the extra skin can add wrinkles. But I still think a thinner face (and body) with a little extra skin looks better than an overweight, younger-looking face (and body).

Well....I might look 10 years older, but I FEEL 20 years younger. SO, I'll take my old haggard looking face and celebrate with my normal blood pressure, perfect cholesterol levels, and average glucose levels. :cheer:


Am I crazy? Or are there others?

Nah, you're not crazy, but hopefully you are not looking for an excuse to give up.

Ummm...for the most part I think the person looks younger in their after pictures so maybe I'm the odd ball here :lol: (I'm looking in the mirror now and see no droopy jowls after losing 140lbs in 17 months either...*scratches head*)

Wow RD, congratulations!! :D Amazing and awesome :)

I've written about it elsewhere but I personally hate the way my face looks. I do think I look a lot older but its just blah...

Having said that, I wouldn't gain the weight back as I'm happy with my weight and my abilities at this weight.

I've written about it elsewhere but I personally hate the way my face looks. I do think I look a lot older but its just blah...

Having said that, I wouldn't gain the weight back as I'm happy with my weight and my abilities at this weight.

yep I think how you feel and your health is most important. I for one am already Butt ugly and fat so if I NO when I get skinny I will just put up with the Butt ugliness but I'll feel much better :D heck I even tried taking my mug shot to post here and I couldn't stomach the look of my own picture ;)

Well....I might look 10 years older, but I FEEL 20 years younger. SO, I'll take my old haggard looking face and celebrate with my normal blood pressure, perfect cholesterol levels, and average glucose levels. :cheer:

What she said :)

I have a confession: I often think people looked better (face wise at least) in their "Before" pictures.

Sometimes I actually think that women look prettier and YOUNGER with the fuller face than after they lose the weight.

Am I crazy? Or are there others?

I gotta tell you, I'm a little offended and a lot surprised. This is a weight loss SUPPORT site. Not a slam those who have made it to goal site. Being a weight LOSS site, the objective of most of us here to have that before pic and here's the kicker - get to have an AFTER picture as well. I'm real sorry that some of those after pics weren't as pretty as the before's.

But quite frankly, I think I looked none too pretty when I was super morbidly obese. My face didn't have too many lines, but boy oh boy was it misshapen and distorted, just like the rest of my body. Yuck. I love how I turned out. My before picture pains me, my after picture(s) (I'm a camera hog now) thrill me. Thrill me!

I've definitely got some new lines on my face. Amazing how that extra fat plumps up and fills in wrinkles. Not only that, I've got fairly deep parenthesis lines on the sides of my mouth, one much more prominent then the other. Those lines are basically sagging skin, I'm thinking. They wouldn't have been there had I never been super morbidly obese. Oh well. I guess I'm fortunate that my neck escaped any "damage", otherwise my pics really might frighten some folks.

But with all my new lines, I often get mistaken for being sisters with my daughters instead of their Mom by folks that didn't know my prior. And those that did know me prior, they tell me constantly that I can pass for one of my daughters.

Luckily, I didn't get into this healthy lifestyle for vanity reasons, I got into it for - good health. And I accomplished that! Like LoriBell, all my numbers are above perfect. And I feel like a trillion bucks. I've got an extensive wardrobe, size 4's and under. Boundless energy. I'm living life to the fullest, am incredibly active, sociable, confident and have never been happier.

IMO, every single after picture, each and every one, every and each, the person ALWAYS looks waaay younger and yes - prettier. And healthier. And more fit. And HAPPIER. But maybe I'm the crazy one. :dizzy:

I know what you're saying. Having the skin be stretched tightly can kind of seem to clear out any facial lines. But in general, I prefer myself thinner. I don't like the extra chin, I don't like the blurring of my true chin line. I have heavy lidded eyes and when I'm overweight, I always look like I'm about to cry or fall asleep or both.

I think the idea that it may take time to settle out after a recent weight loss is interesting. Sounds intriguing.

I also think that this phenom is why exercise is urged rather than diet alone.

sometimes the face will look more wrinkly.......

I also think that this phenom is why exercise is urged rather than diet alone.

Well you can't really exercise your face... Although when I was super morbidly obese I worked my jaw quite a bit. ;)

As a reminder, too, to anyone considering whether this might be a reason NOT to lose weight...if you don't like the way your face looks when you've gotten to goal, you can always gain it back!

My personal experience was that I went to "gaunt" right after losing, then everything evened out fairly nicely. I think your body does have a bit of shock but I've never seen anyone maintaining a big loss for a while still have that gaunt look without being at a very low/unhealthy weight.

The Biggest Loser contestants are examples of this. Ali, for example, looks WAY less pulled/gaunt now than she did at the finale. She hasn't gained - her body has just adjusted from the physical shock of the weight loss.

In some cases, the before pictures *are* significantly younger.

I think this is a fantastic point! My 'before' picture, such as it is (I've been heavy almost all my life, except for the year I was 23) is 11 years old. So, yeah, I WAS younger! :lol:

My face definitely looks worse now, but even with that I'm still so happy to be 130. Morbid obesity wasn't exactly an attractive look for me either!

My face definitely looks worse now, but even with that I'm still so happy to be 130. Morbid obesity wasn't exactly an attractive look for me either!

WOW! you have done great!!! congrats...I thought that if I looked worse when I lose the weight I would look into one of those lifestyle lifts just a thought. everyone here that has lost the weight and maintained it are true hero's no matter what.jmo :hug:

Well you can't really exercise your face... Although when I was super morbidly obese I worked my jaw quite a bit. ;)


LOL!

Re the exercising face thing...I think that with some weight training, one tenses one's facial muscles enough to where that may affect things. Maybe not, but I've thought that a while.

I hated my old big round face and double (triple!) chin. Love my new cheekbones, I feel like a model.

Exhibit A - Big round face

http://gloriana.myphotoalbum.com/view_photo.php?set_albumName=album02&id=before2

Exibit B - new slimmer face

(please excuse red devil flash eyes)
http://gloriana.myphotoalbum.com/view_photo.php?set_albumName=album09&id=christmas07

http://gloriana.myphotoalbum.com/view_photo.php?set_albumName=album09&id=at_game_night

http://gloriana.myphotoalbum.com/view_photo.php?set_albumName=album09&id=coopers

http://gloriana.myphotoalbum.com/view_photo.php?set_albumName=album09&id=flowers_diego

Of course, now that my face is smaller I think my nose looks bigger! ha :)

Another thing to note, I have practically ZERO before pictures, I hated pictures. I have ooooooodles of after pictures. Love pictures now! Happy!

I have a confession: I often think people looked better (face wise at least) in their "Before" pictures.

Sometimes I actually think that women look prettier and YOUNGER with the fuller face than after they lose the weight.

Am I crazy? Or are there others?


Well they say a picture speaks 1000 words, I think Glory's pics do a lot of talking. And from what I'm hearing, well it's the exact opposite of what you've mentioned. But that's just my opinion. Who knows, maybe I really am crazy :dunno:.

Glory, you were beautiful before, but now you're simply radiant.

Re the exercising face thing...I think that with some weight training, one tenses one's facial muscles enough to where that may affect things.

Ummm, that just may be a stretch, no? Regardless, you can't change excess skin into muscle. Two different issues.

I guess my round face was kind of a baby face, definitely looked younger I guess. Not sure if fat baby face is better than mature woman face with killer cheekbones!

Oh - let's play guess my age! Even with my slim face, no one ever gets my age right (unless people are being kind, which is possible!)

ok I guess you are 36????:D

I was surprised by this thread also. I was looking at the before/after pictures on here and was just thinking that everyone looks so much better after weight loss, which gives me more motivation! I think the people who have lost weight look a lot younger too. I think everyone saying their face looks bad now is crazy, maybe you guys just haven't adjusted to it yet? I'm not a maintainer but I'm sure it just takes a while to get use to! =] Like glory said, I think it's just the disappearing baby face that makes people feel like they look older?

Anyways, I think Glory looks about 27-30 now? Congrats btw, you look great! :)

You're good - I just turned 40! :)

Well I would have never started this thread BUT I cant let OP get bashed alone I guess Ill put on my flame resistent suit and join in. Just last night DH and I were talking about how many people look older once theyve lost weight and he said most look better/prettier face wise in their before pics. We were also wondering why so many people dont stop when they get to a healthy weight and instead go from one extreme to another and end up looking gaunt and sickly. Im sorry if that offends or doesnt sit well with people but I also dont understand why we cant discuss things without being bashed. Its not one person who sees that and Im sure its not just the OP and DH and I that do either others just dont want to get flamed like OP has been. And I think PP did answer our gaunt question and things settling after a while makes sense too so for me Im glad this thread was started bc it addresses a concern we had. No one is disputing that being healthy is best regardless if you look a little older or not as pretty in some ways. But truth is some people do look younger and more attractive with a normal or heavy face than they do with a too thin face. I think everyone who has posted here is beautiful.
Im not talking about anyone in particular Ive seen pics here, people in real life and people on TV and a mixture of all of them Ive thought a. they look older thinner esp younger people as mentioned, b sometimes their face is prettier on their way down or in before pics, and c. that a lot of people end up looking way to gant
Im ugly regardless LOL and the only pics I have of me at a not morbidly obese weight I was 19 and I know I wont look like that and will be dissapointed. I dont know I agree with OP and I dont mean it to be offending its just the fact of how I see things and I bet if more people were honest and less pc theyd say so too. It doesnt take away from the hard work people have done. It doesnt take away from their beauty NOW it doesnt take away from their health its just a fact that some peoples face looks better when its not so thin.

Love my new cheekbones, I feel like a model.



And you look like one!!! Gorgeous!

No one is bashing anyone. Well that's not entirely true. That's basically how the thread started...

Just imagine if someone who's made it to goal, started a thread about how ugly people look in their before pictures and how much older they look. I really don't think that would go over too well. It's one thing if you've made it to goal and state it about yourself. But to put down a whole group of people, call them older looking and not as pretty, IMO - it's just not right. But that is just my opinion. Which I think I'm entitled too. And I don't think I've offended anyone by stating it. At least I hope I haven't. If I have, then I do apologize.

Again, this is a SUPPORT site. We're supposed to support one another. Help one another. And I don't think this was very supportive of folks who've made it to goal - putting down their looks. Again, if it were worded differently, if the op had concerns for herself - perhaps.

I actually have a photo album of my progress posted here:
http://www.3fatchicks.com/forum/1391882-post37.html

The pictures of me in the 350s are painful. I think my favorite picture is of me at 275. My most recent picture of last month makes me look a bit younger because I'm wearing a puppy dog hat. You can definitely see all the lines in my face.

I'm not sure if it'll work but I've started using Strivectin-SD on my face to see if it'll help some. Probably not and I should know better but it was at Costco and if nothing else, my face will be well moisturized.

Love your hair and your puppy dog hat! I think you look awesome :)

Nelie, I've never seen your progress pics before; you are really lovely. I think you look just great and have nothing to worry about.

Please let us know how the Strivectin-SD works; I've seen ads for it in magazines and have been curious.

Whoa Nellie! you look fantastic!!!

i always worry about this in my head but it's usually the pics and stories on this site that let me forget all about it. everyone seems so much happier when they reach goal and i think everyone looks beautiful! also i am big believer in confidence making you attractive. when im thinner i am more confident and i just flat out feel prettier.

No one is bashing anyone. Well that's not entirely true. That's basically how the thread started...

Just imagine if someone who's made it to goal, started a thread about how ugly people look in their before pictures and how much older they look. I really don't think that would go over too well. It's one thing if you've made it to goal and state it about yourself. But to put down a whole group of people, call them older looking and not as pretty, IMO - it's just not right. But that is just my opinion. Which I think I'm entitled too. And I don't think I've offended anyone by stating it. At least I hope I haven't. If I have, then I do apologize.

Again, this is a SUPPORT site. We're supposed to support one another. Help one another. And I don't think this was very supportive of folks who've made it to goal - putting down their looks. Again, if it were worded differently, if the op had concerns for herself - perhaps.

Actually I wasnt going to point fingers but it was your post that I felt was most out of line and rude aka bashing.

If she had said lookingfomeagain looks worse now then she did fat that would be rude and bashing but just in general I dont think being honest about how you feel is rude or bashing anyone. If she is losing weight than this may be a concern she wants to address. Maybe she couldve worded it better but were all guilty of that sometimes. I think your being very oversensitive and taking it as a personal attack for no reason.

...Just last night DH and I were talking about how many people look older once theyve lost weight and he said most look better/prettier face wise in their before pics. We were also wondering why so many people dont stop when they get to a healthy weight and instead go from one extreme to another and end up looking gaunt and sickly...

I can only speak for myself, but I have decided to work on these last 10 pounds even though at my original goal of 158 I was technically in a "normal" BMI because I wanted to be in the middle of normal instead the high end of normal. So if I should go on vacation, or break my leg or something, I have a little wiggle room before I'm right back into being overweight. I don't think the last 10 pounds has really effected my face, but my butt is sure smaller ;) I personally don't really care that people think I look older because like I stated before I feel much younger, and I think that radiates into just about every aspect of my life. I feel younger in the 140's than I did in the 150's, and YEARS younger than I did at 333 pounds...YEARS.

Most every one I have ever known to lose weight, their face is the FIRST place I notice it. They have this skinny beautiful face and still have a huge arse, or giant belly. So what are they to do? Keep the unhealthy bellies in lieu of a wrinkle-less face or get fit? That hip-waist ratio is the danger zone in obesity, not the facial wrinkle factor. Sadly, vanity is a reason that many lose weight and sadly that's why many stay overweight as well. You don't know how many posts I've read from morbidly obese woman asking if they will have loose skin after weight loss...**** YES you will have loose skin. That's life. ;)

Whoa Nelie is right! Major transformation. You look FABULOUS!

WOW Glory and Nelie, you are BOTH beautiful! I don't think I've ever seen your pics before. HOT!

I think we also need to be careful not to use the "fears" of looking older, gaunt or whatever as an excuse to not become fit. There I said it.

If someone has more lines or more wrinkles or whatever, it isn't something that cannot be fixed ONE afternoon in a surgeon's office if it bothers them enough. Obesity on the other hand....

I am very young looking an I hope that weight loss will not hinder that, as my husband is 18 years younger than me. I want to look GOOD...LOL... :D;)

My fiance is nearly 10 years younger than me!!!

A very topical post over on MSNBC!

http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/33385839/ns/health-skin_and_beauty?gt1=43001

Although weight is mentioned as a factor of looking older, the bigger whammies appear to be sun damage and cigarette smoking. I've never smoked and or spent much time in the sun. The slide slow is impressive! I'm sitting inside and it's night, but I have an urge for more sun screen!

We were also wondering why so many people dont stop when they get to a healthy weight and instead go from one extreme to another and end up looking gaunt and sickly.

I can comment on this...it really is just that your body needs some time to adjust. I landed at a weight that was actually 5 lbs above "normal" for my height, but I did look a bit gaunt for a while. But mine evened out, without gaining back any weight...it's not that I went to a "too thin" weight so much as my face needed some time to adjust. But I do think most people who lose a significant amount of weight DO go through an adjustment period, face-wise.

Consider Ali Vincent from the Biggest Loser, first photo at the finale:
http://battlingforhealth.com/wp-content/uploads/2008/04/ali-vincent-130377_20672.jpg

And even 5 months later, without any weight gain, her face looks to me more full (I'd include the image in the post but it's a little big):

http://storage.people.com/jpgs/20080929/20080929-750-168.jpg

Just last night DH and I were talking about how many people look older once theyve lost weight and he said most look better/prettier face wise in their before pics. We were also wondering why so many people dont stop when they get to a healthy weight and instead go from one extreme to another and end up looking gaunt and sickly.

I can answer for myself - I'm a classic pear. I had a big butt big hips big thighs when I was heavy and I still am shaped exactly the same, just smaller. I would still like to lose a little more in the downstairs area, but I've found that my top half gets too thin. I have been down as low as 126 but my boyfriend said I was "too ribby."

Well I would have never started this thread BUT I cant let OP get bashed alone I guess Ill put on my flame resistent suit and join in. Just last night DH and I were talking about how many people look older once theyve lost weight and he said most look better/prettier face wise in their before pics. We were also wondering why so many people dont stop when they get to a healthy weight and instead go from one extreme to another and end up looking gaunt and sickly. Im sorry if that offends or doesnt sit well with people but I also dont understand why we cant discuss things without being bashed.

Well, I think the problem with a thread like this is that while the OP may have all the best intentions in the world and ask an innocent question, people tend to find personal meaning in what is said (I think that's called subjective validation), and sometimes do get offended. It can be hard to avoid when you think people might be talking about you -- even if they are not.

So, if I'm morbidly obese now and someone talks about how people who are morbidly obese often look worse in the face, I might get offended.

And if I've lost lots of weight and someone mentions that people who lose a lot of weight often look worse in the face, then I might get offended.

I think you have to figure that anytime you mention a negative outcome associated with a particular group -- whether it's looks or health or whatever -- someone is likely to get offended, whether you mean to offend or not.

I think if I let myself get offended every time I read a something negative in a post about someone who seems like me, then I would never have any rest for worrying and arguing about it.

Maybe we should keep that in mind when we post -- someone might be offended by this -- and when we respond -- perhaps no one meant to offend me, really.

its like that old saying about not being able to please all the people all the time.. if we go thru each thread on this forum im sure we could find reasons to be offended if we looked hard enough. no matter what topic of discussion comes up, we are a varied group of people with only one outstanding thing in common and that is that we are now or have been overweight.. we are very different individuals that will take things different ways.. i too have seen a couple threads that i thought were kinda rude, so i chose not to respond in them... me putting in my two cents about em being rude most likely wouldnt change one persons mind, and my time is much too valuable to spend wasting it. there are sooo many threads i do enjoy reading and i go straight to them and dont waste my time on the ones i dont enjoy.. we all have personal feelings about our weight loss... as well as our own personal fears.. my PERSONAL fear is that i will look older.. it wont stop me from losing the weight.. but it is something that worrys ME.. and as far as i knew, this forum is a place to discuss our fears about weight loss, as well as the joys, the helpful hints, etc... i just dont believe in bashing anyone for their opinion.. no one here is better than anyone else and we All have a right to our opinions and the freedom to express them....

just my 2 cents.... bash away lol:hug:

I am very young looking an I hope that weight loss will not hinder that, as my husband is 18 years younger than me. I want to look GOOD...LOL... :D;)

I'm fairly certain that getting down to a normal weight will not only make you look and FEEL more fit, sexy, energetic and younger, but it will also give you the very best chance of actually LIVING and extending your life so that you will be around to share that life with your husband a LOT longer then had you remained morbidly obese. :)

we All have a right to our opinions and the freedom to express them....


Absolutely. BUT there is a time and a place for everything. The administrators and moderators make sure that everyone makes nice nice. You can't say whatever you want HERE (or many places for that matter). There are rules to abide by. This is not our own personal living room. This being a SUPPORT site (not a mudslinging site), we do our best to not put down one anothers looks. It is one thing if the OP had gotten down to goal and then expressed dissatisfaction with HER OWN outcome. Not others.

I think I'm going to end it here. I don't know that we're getting anywhere constructive with this thread anymore and just worry more feelings are getting hurt.