Hi all!
I'm seriously considering a TT w/some lipo because I decided I can't stand being self conscious daily with my floppy belly. I'm seeing the surgeon this comig week. I'm about 70 pounds down from my highest weight. I reached this weight almost 5 years ago. My weight in that time has gone lower, but it has never gone higher than I am. I think this is the weight I want to be (or maybe about 8 lbs. less ultimately). I look OK in clothes, depending on what I wear, but there's always that "muffin top" or "donut" that makes me constantly adjust my clothes and I feel like people are staring at it (even though they probably aren't). And that icky pooch down at the bottom of my belly that just looks like a deflated balloon. Yuck
I realize this is a big surgery and it's very $$$ and scary! I have about half the amount cash and I can finance the rest and pay it off pretty quickly if I sacrifice other things.
So I have the money part settled enough to deal with.
My next issue is telling/not telling what I'm doing. I probably have to tell my mother even though I'm an adult-but she'd be very upset if I didn't tell her. I just don't want to be judged or for her to tell anybody else.
Then there's the bigger issue-work. This is stressing me out so much! I know I haven't even scheduled a surgery yet and I might be jumping the gun with obsessing, but I know myself and this is how I get when I know in my heart I've made up my mind about something.
Would you tell people if you were me?
Also, anybody who has done this, do the results show immediately? Or does it take a while to settle down (the swelling), so it looks like you lost weight over that time? TIA!
I don't think I would try so hard to keep it a secret. Maybe it's because I live in Southern California where plastic surgery is very common, but I don't see where you have any reason to be ashamed. You lost a great deal of weight and kept it off and now you are just wanting to fix a little skin. Why do you think people will judge you? That doesn't mean you have to scream it from the rooftops - there is a difference between a secret and discretion. I would tell the people that matter to me because it is major surgery.
You are right in a way. I shouldn't be ashamed. But I'm a pretty private person and I work closely with people who sometimes talk when others aren't around. In other words-gossip! I'm not sure I want people examining me/looking me up and down afterwards. I just want to go on with my life without having to discuss it or justify myself, even though it's MY body and MY money. Know what I mean? I wish I didn't have to feel this way, but I just DO!
I can understand not wanting to be the focus of gossip. I guess then I would only tell people I trust to not talk about me and let them know I'd like to stay out of the gossip spotlight. Honestly, even if it did get out that you'd had it done, I can't imagine that after a few days anyone will even think about it. They'll move on to the next gossip subject! Good luck!
Even though reconstructive surgery is nothing to be embarrassed about, it's totally understandable that you wouldn't want to be the topic of discussion at work. You wouldn't be able to hide that you have surgery, but I'd suggest you say unspecified "female surgery" and leave it at that. Guys go "ick" and won't want to pursue the topic and if any woman are rude enough to keep on bothering you, just say it's personal and you don't want to discuss it.
As for results, it takes a good six months to a year for the swelling to completely go away but you'll be able to see results right away because the skin will be gone.
Try not to be scared about the surgery! My doctor pointed out that it's just getting rid of skin, not cutting into bone, muscle or organs. So though it seems like a big surgery, it really isn't. I don't know if my experience is typical but I had a lower body lift (7 1/2 hours of surgery), only needed five days of pain pills, and was back in the gym within three weeks. And needless to say, I'm beyond thrilled with the results, even six years later!!
Thanks Meg,
I just feel kinda funny about the whole thing. Even with my mother. She gave me a hard time while I was losing weight-I think she thought I was doing unhealthy things when it was quite the opposite! So I'm afraid she's going to think I have some kind of body dysmorphic disorder or something. I'm not happy with myself and don't want to go on like this if it's something I can change!
I had breast reduction by the same surgeon I have a consultation with about 9 years ago and the experience wasn't too bad. I had another surgery to remove a huge lipoma by him 2 years ago, so clearly I'm comfortable w/the PS.
The surgery scares me and everything, but the worst thing I'm feeling is guilt and fear of needing to fib etc. Guilt about the money and feeling like I'm being vain. I'm afraid my mother will think I'm doing this because I don't like myself, but the opposite is true-it's because I LOVE myself!!!!
Then do it for yourself and hold your head up and be proud! It's only ignorant people who think skin removal is somehow "vain". All we want is to have as close to "normal" looking bodies as possible. None of us are using plastic surgery to enhance what nature gave us; instead, we're undoing the damage caused by years of obesity. We're simply trying to be normal, nothing more.
And please don't feel guilty! Getting rid of the skin is going to let you move on from your past, instead of being a constant reminder of who you were -- but aren't any longer. It's truly the best gift you could give yourself.
Be sure to come back and tell us about your consultation. This is so exciting!
I had a TT and Breast Lift/Implants last December. My immediate family knew, plus a few close friends however beyond that I didn't think it was anyone business. However the longer I've had it the more comfortable I am telling people. Now when I discuss my weight loss I generally tell people. At first it was me becoming comfortable with, i felt people would think I was cheating when all reality everyone I've told understands and thinks I'm rewarding myself.
Plus you have to tell at least one person, this is major surgery and someone will need to take care of you for probable the first couple weeks, you need people there for the emotional support, it's a big change it is hard to adjust.
Some of the results are immediate for instance you could immediately tell I had boobs. However, I still have swelling issues and it's been this long. They took 11 pounds of skin off my stomach and couldn't lipo any fat because there wasn't any there. Partly why mine took forever to heal (seriously I only started doing crunches last week and still have trouble sitting up from lying on my back).
Lastly best piece of advise buy maternity pants to wear after the surgery, it will allow you to look like you are wearing normal clothing, hid the compression garments (espically the dress pants with the full panel from motherhood), and if you have drains (I had drains for 6 weeks) then it will hold them in place.
Last edited by RememberHowToSmile; 10-22-2009 at 12:59 AM.
I don't think it's anyone's business at all. Tell your supervisor you are having surgery to correct a defect that you don't want to be public about, and tell your mom your doctor has given you medical reasons to have the excess skin removed. (Surely you can think of some---rashes, pressure on your abdomen when you wear the correct size of pants but the excess skin is crushing you, back pain, etc.) I had breast reduction and a TT (which btw involves more than just skin removal---maybe yours won't but I'd had three pregnancies and the muscles in a TT are restored to their original unseparated position, which is what most people need recovery time for), and I didn't tell anyone but my husband and I didn't need much help after the first day at home. I prepared by exercising and doing a lot of ab work and it paid off; also followed directions regarding rest and restrictions the first several days, and I was up and seeming normal in a week. It's all part of taking care of yourself in a way you didn't do before your weight loss. It's private but it's also commendable that you care about you enough to finish what you started.
I prepared by exercising and doing a lot of ab work and it paid off
Not to derail this thread but I'm interested in what kind of exercises you did in preparation for the surgery. I've got 6 weeks to go before mine and want to use the time to help my recovery/results as much as possible.
consult w/PS for TT and how keep it secret?
And that icky pooch down at the bottom of my belly that just looks like a deflated balloon. Yuck
