It really is.
Warning: long rambling musings ahead! 
Last week, if you recall, I was hovering on the line between staying calm and stressing out because for the first time in eight weeks the scale was going up instead of down. Leaving aside the little fact that at eight weeks in I'm still a rookie compared to some experts here...today my scale (my PT and I have come to a kind of unspoken agreement: he won't tell me off so much if I weigh myself, and I'll wean myself off the emotional attachment to the number) told me I'm back to my all-time low of 223 and that I'm no longer lying with my ticker and stats here.
(I detest lying, but evidently the shame at the number going up outranks that. Will be working on that....)
I've learnt here that weight loss isn't linear. I've learnt that you can't tie "What I did on Monday" to "How much I weigh on Tuesday morning." Whilst I guess we know much more about how our bodies work now than we did in the past, to me it still seems like a black box: I'm told what to put in, and everything somehow gets better.
As a control freak (allegedly
) I can see this being a potential problem. I'm the patient who, at the opticians, wants to know
exactly how long her eyeball is and why that makes her short-sighted. I asked my doctor why he had prescribed
this particular anti-d instead of the host of other SSRIs out there. Yes, I also googled what SSRIs were.
So present me with a situation where I can't identify, analyse and understand (at least to some extent) every aspect of the process, and the rest of me watches in vague amusement as the control freak within me has a mild meltdown.
But you know what? The fact that there is
more to me than just that control freak is rather liberating. The rest of me is happy that the logic of good food + exercise == health + weight loss has prevailed. I don't need all the details, I guess. My body can do its thing so long as I treat it well. It's not a baby that needs me looking over its shoulder.
Hurray for the human body! Now to have lunch and crack on with this paper I'm supposed to be writing. Thanks for reading all the way down here
The human body is a marvellous thing
I did not want to change my ticker or my sig, but finally resigned to it when after 7 days I was still in the freakin 220's. Today, I'm back at 219.6. Again. Hopefully for the last time. *sigh* 
Someone else made sense of my post! Thank you! 
OMG! 
That is SO me, but I have never really put it into words. You said it perfectly. The constant needing to know everything about what I am doing and asking of why this, why that, why Why WHY! .. the googling of information on everything under the sun. Analyzing things until I can analyze no more... I could go on, but I just wanted to let you know that I know exactly how you feel! I am learning to let go of that, too.. and just be happy I am along for the ride. 
