Mini-Goals - Resisted Breakfast from Evil Boyfriend!
09-03-2009, 12:39 PM
He did it again. My boyfriend is the reason I gained a bunch of weight back after I had lost it: he keeps feeding me! And I really like food, and he would be eating at the same time, and it would be so yummy, so I would always eat it.
When I started this new diet 10 days ago, I told him "I'm REALLY on a diet this time, you can't feed me anymore!" And he agreed, but also admitted that it would be difficult for him. And he would still do it -- offer me some of what he's eating here and there. And I do think it's really subconscious for him. He just likes to take care of me :)
But this morning he really did it. He got up early and while I was still in the bathroom, he went out to get McDonald's breakfast. I don't normally like fast food much, nor do I like McDonald's food in particular, but I do like their breakfast food. And he didn't just get himself breakfast. He got some specifically for me. :(
So, on our way to work, I'm sitting there with the McDonald's bag in my lap, knowing there's an egg mcmuffin in there for me, and trying to justify in my head, "I know it's about 300 calories. I can substitute..." etc. And he finally asked me, "are you going to eat it?" I hesitated, then said simply it's not on my diet. He apologized, but at that point I hadn't made up my mind, because I had already been looking forward to that *yummy* sandwich, so I was really torn. He offered to eat it for me, and I began thinking: I could eat it, and adjust the rest of my calories for the day, or I could be good and not eat it, and I would be proud, but boy would I be missing out...
So anyway, I ended up hesitating for the next 10 minutes until he had finished his own sandwich and asked for mine. So I handed it over (considered taking a bite first, but didn't), and that was that.
I did it! I resisted his evil food offerings! :carrot: And it won't be the last time, let me tell you. That boy is going to be the hardest part of this diet, I'm sure of it. Just gotta take it one meal at a time with him.
09-03-2009, 12:40 PM
That is awesome!! You should be sooo proud. Congrats :cheer3::hug:
09-03-2009, 12:46 PM
Thanks. It was a BIG deal. I really wanted to eat it. I'm going to have to hide his keys so he can't go out early for breakfast anymore... lol.
09-03-2009, 12:48 PM
Hopefully he will begin to understand and support you in your journey and not offer up anymore temptations :hug:
09-03-2009, 12:50 PM
I think you have to put your foot down . Tell him you really appreciate the thought but you just can't eat what he is offering you. Give him some suggestions of what you can eat , you can still eat together, just not the same foods.
09-03-2009, 02:46 PM
My husband is also a feeder and he does it to take care of me and make me happy. I explained to him that taking care of me means helping me stay on my diet and that I will be happier when I have lost weight and am healthier. I was recently diagnosed type 2 diabetic. I took him to my diabetes class with me. I have shown him all kinds of info about what I should and shouldn't eat and things like that. He now takes care of me and makes me happy by doing things like going and getting me sugar free cheesecake from Golden Corral (yummy!!) and looking for healthier ways to make some of our favs and helping me track my numbers. Try having a serious talk with your boyfriend about how he can help you and how achieving your goals will make you happy. See if he will let you teach him which foods are healthy. There is nothing wrong with him getting up early and getting you breakfast, there are many women who would kill for a mate that did that, he just needs to learn what kind of breakfast to get you.
09-04-2009, 12:44 PM
Wow FitGirlyGirl you husband is really something! Not many around like him.
I have a friend that every times she tries to diet, her husband brings home cookies, ice-cream and all kinds of junk foods--her favorites. It has been a real struggle for her to lose her weight. It is like he purposefully tries to get her off her diet. Very sad to see.
09-04-2009, 12:54 PM
Good for you. That must have been very hard.
Is your boyfriend by chance overweight? It sounds like he might not have the best eating habits, which I'm sure makes being healthy extra challenging for you. Good job!
09-04-2009, 07:33 PM
Good for you!
I know how hard that can be! Some people just don't understand what you are going through, and how you are struggling. It's usually totally unintentional on their part. Often the people who really love you don't actually see you as being overweight, so they just don't understand, and it's easy for them to forget that you are on a diet, especially if you are just starting out.
Take it from me, my roommate used to be this skinny little thing, a model even, but she had a huge appetite and loved to eat out for pretty much every single meal. So of course I would always eat out WITH her. (she was also one of my best friends, so we did everything together, even eat). Unfortunately, my metabolism isn't as fast as hers, so I gained 50 lbs while living with her! It was especially hard to see that I was gaining the weight, because my eating buddy never gained an ounce.
I'm sure once your guy gets used to the idea that you are serious about this diet, he'll stop bringing you fast food.
09-07-2009, 05:40 PM
Yes, my boyfriend and I are both overweight, it happened at the same time. As soon as we started dating he wanted to take me out everywhere and we both gained weight.
He keeps saying he is going to start his diet (he lost weight on a protein diet and did well until we gained weight together lol), but he hasn't started it yet.
And he just likes to feed me no matter what. And not even fast food. We don't eat fast food very often, but whatever he's eating, whether lasagna or chili or anything, he just can't help but offer me some. He usually apologizes right away, because he does want to support me on my diet. It's just a hard habit for him to break.
The hard part is, that I find it hard to refuse when he offers, cuz I usually will like what he's eating. So really it's just up to me to stay on my diet.
09-10-2009, 12:50 PM
We have come to a solution!
My boyfriend finally decided he needs to get back in shape, so we are now in a competition to see who will lose the most pounds by the new year! We have both picked out what we will win, and I think our prizes are quite motivating :D
It still doesn't mean there won't be temptation from him though. Because we're competing, he's going to try to sabotage my diet (though not too badly I hope!). And we are on different diets, so his food is not necessarily good for my diet.
We love getting Japanese and yesterday he offered to take me out for some, I almost refused, but then knew if he got some I'd want some, so I told him he could get me a 6 piece sushi. We ended up not going, cuz it's not good for his diet either lol. I'm not worried though... I'm much more competitive in nature than he is, and if I smell a sabotage attempt, I'll be sure to retaliate even more (though I want him to lose weight as well)
Today I scored a victory: I got up early to get to the gym before work, a habit we've been trying to get into for over a month. I woke him up, but he was just too tired to get out of bed. So I went without him, yay for me! My plan is to stay between 1300-1500 calories a day, and exercise twice a day.. gym in the morning, and an evening walk. So far so good :)
09-11-2009, 12:27 PM
That is awesome that you have turned something that was a challenge to your health plans and could have easily turned into a challenge to your relationship into a bonus for both of you health wise and a way for you guys to have something to share and bond with. Congrats and good luck.