100 lb. Club - I need help: Im not doing so well




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MugCanDoIt
08-31-2009, 10:51 AM
I really dont know what has happened to me. I have binged for the last 3 weekends in a row and cant seem to get a handle on it. I havent lost any more weight and am scared to death this might be the end of my weight loss journey if I dont get a handle on it quick. Ive had to make myself go walking for exercise, literally. I just cant seem to stop the binging. I want to lose 80 more lbs and I am so depressed and scared. :?:


Kae
08-31-2009, 10:58 AM
You are doing so amazing... don't give up now! Sometimes it feels like everytime I take a step forward my body takes two steps back... like I am fighting with myself because part of my mind wants to stay safe behind the cushion of my fat.

You have made amazing progress and it's great that you are still walking. Are you meal planning on the weekends at all? What is your weekend schedule like?

hpnodat
08-31-2009, 11:00 AM
Have you been keeping track of everything you eat, even on days you don't eat on plan? That's what gets me everytime, is when I stop writing down what I eat. When I stop being accountable. Another thing I do is keep a journal and write how I'm feeling and things that are going on.
You've already lost 91 lbs! That's fantastic. Be proud of what you have accomplished so far try not to focus on how much more you want to lose. It can be overwhelming. You can do it! You siggy even says so!


annie175
08-31-2009, 11:01 AM
Just as your name says....you can do it....come on, get a grip on it. Don't let all your hard work go by the wayside. Reach out, ask for help for the higher up.

Thighs Be Gone
08-31-2009, 11:16 AM
Mug CAN do it, you are DOING it. You WILL continue doing it. This is what you want. This is what you have worked for.

Set yourself for success. Get the crap out of the house. If it's something you have EVER binged, get rid of it now. Put it down the disposal if you must.

Find some things you CAN binge. Some of mine are baby carrots, Shiratake noodles, Arctic Zero ice cream, egg whites and tons of vegetables and non-fat cooking spray, coffee with sweetner, etc.

Are you eating enough healthy fats and plenty of protein???? Are you drinking your water????

Last, lets replace the weekend habits. What is it about the weekend that allows you to binge? Do you stay home--than get out! Make yourself window shop, walk, go volunteer somewhere. Whatever.

You CAN do this. You ARE doing this.

Rosinante
08-31-2009, 11:17 AM
Oh Mug, I do know how you feel, I'm in the same kind of situation, like I've lost control, like I can't remember how to do it.

I followed suggestions on here about trying to keep 'clean' for 3 days. That was hard but doable. Today I'm on day 2 of a second set of 3, and it's still not easy. I've just stood for 5 minutes with a loaf of home made bread in my hand, debating whether to eat some or not. So far, not is winning.

Have a :hug:

dragonwoman64
08-31-2009, 11:52 AM
:hug: hang in there! I know how it feels to stall out and have set backs, it's hard! Take a deep breath (this is for me too, ha!), and just start back on plan in the moment you're in. Those past weekends are past, think about how you can deal with the one coming up.

Remember, and I've had to tell myself this lots of times, hitting glitches is part of the process.

Don't be scared, you have lots of support here and people who can totally relate to what you're going through. I know you can do it, you've already lost a phenomenal amount of weight, give yourself credit for that and think about what it took for you to do it. You obviously have a lot of will power and mental wherewithal inside of you.

better health3
08-31-2009, 12:03 PM
First, I've been there so I know how you feel. Who is in control here? Try not to bring foods into the house, buy what is only on your pre-planned menu, and do not carry cash with you going to and from work. Put that extra money towards a new outfit or vacation or whatever reward you can.

You can do this. Focus on completing your exercise and eating quality foods in the right amounts for your stats. Journal what is really bothering you.

In the end only you determine if you succeed or fail. Look at the success stories. They can do it, so can you. Forget about your past binges. Who cares? Focus on success for this minute. Please don't beat yourself up: it only makes it worse. Why waste another minute of your life. Take back control. Bingeing only leads to misery and unhappiness. The good news is that you reached out. Keep going. How bad do you want it?

The successful people think long-term and not instant gratification. Sacrifice today for what you really want tomorrow. Use your fear for that kick butt workout. Let your mind show your body who is boss. Good luck.

I think your old habits are coming back to test you if you have truly changed. I've done this before only to regain the weight back. Please don't let it happen to you. You deserve to enjoy the most out of your life.

It is not worth it in any way, shape or form. You have done wonderful things for your health. Keep going.

Onederchic
08-31-2009, 12:05 PM
You've gotten some great advice here. I just wanted to post that you have done so wonderful, you can do this. Never give upon yourself :hug::hug:

findingfawn
08-31-2009, 12:10 PM
Goodness girl, look how far you have come! You have proven to yourself that you CAN do this, you know what it takes, and you have the ability to control yourself.

Take a step back, look and see what it is that triggers the binges and change what leads up to them. You are amazing and you can't let this defeat you!!!

Lori Bell
08-31-2009, 12:38 PM
Mug CAN do it, you are DOING it. You WILL continue doing it. This is what you want. This is what you have worked for.

Set yourself for success. Get the crap out of the house. If it's something you have EVER binged, get rid of it now. Put it down the disposal if you must.

Find some things you CAN binge. Some of mine are baby carrots, Shiratake noodles, Arctic Zero ice cream, egg whites and tons of vegetables and non-fat cooking spray, coffee with sweetner, etc.

Are you eating enough healthy fats and plenty of protein???? Are you drinking your water????

Last, lets replace the weekend habits. What is it about the weekend that allows you to binge? Do you stay home--than get out! Make yourself window shop, walk, go volunteer somewhere. Whatever.

You CAN do this. You ARE doing this.

Yes, yes, yes and YES! I totally agree with everything here! Come on Mug, don't settle. PLEASE don't settle for 2nd best.

I had a rough patch in January. After a Christmas Day free for all I had a terrible time getting back 100% on track. All the sugar, and carby stuff made the sugar beast rear it's ugly head and I had several weekends were I lost control. I prayed about it, long and hard. It took some doing, and some good old fashion hard work, but I made it over the hump and so can you! I want you to see Onederland SO badly. Don't give up. Force yourself to succeed. Just like you force yourself to do laundry and pay bills. You have come too far to quit now. In a month you can easily gain back 20 pounds if you don't get a handle. Is a weekend binge worth the MAJOR depression you will feel when you have to dig out, (or go buy) new fat pants?

salsa chip
08-31-2009, 12:51 PM
I'm saying the following as much to myself as to you: we deserve so much better than how we think of ourselves right now.

Lori's right. We MUST NOT settle. There is a PERFECTION out there for each and every one of us, and it's almost abusive to settle for anything other than that.

You've come so far to stop now (and the only one who actually MAKES you stop is YOU). Don't think about the 80lbs you still have to go. Think of the 26lbs to get to ONEDERLAND. You've done 26lbs. You've done it THREE AND A HALF TIMES, in fact. You can do it one more time...and rejoice in a 1 at the beginning of your weight :carrot::sunny: I wish I were as close to it as you are!

time2lose
08-31-2009, 01:00 PM
Mug,
I don't have any advice to add because you have already been given wonderful advice. Just want to give you a :hug: and tell you to hang in there!

susiemartin
08-31-2009, 01:40 PM
I'm sending a little prayer your way. :angel:

I don't have any advice , but I do know just what you're going through :hug:
I've hit a rough patch too and I'm hoping the September Weight Loss Challenge will help me to refocus.

Binging is a big flashing yellow light for me.
I find that when I start binging and can't stop, it's usually because somewhere in my life I'm being deprived of something.

With me it's often free time or affection. Maybe you' work the same way too?

Serephina
08-31-2009, 02:05 PM
Sit down and write yourself a promise that you are not going to eat anything except your planned meals for the rest of today. Tape in on the frige. If you dont have any meals planned, then you probably should get that done too. You know you can hold out for the rest of the day. Don't worry about tomorrow yet, just make good choices for the rest of today. You can do this, girl!

rockinrobin
08-31-2009, 02:30 PM
Okay love, what kind of talk is this? You can't seem to stop binging? No my dear - stop telling yourself this. YOU CAN stop it. It's that you won't. By saying that you CAN'T, it's like giving yourself permission TO. You absolutely CAN stop this. This is something that you HAVE the power over. DON'T EVER FORGET THAT. Because it's important. Stop giving "the food" all that power. It's got no feelings, no brain, no nothing. "It" can't control you - YOU control "it".

Okay. Look at you. Just look how phenomenal you are and how far you've come. Did you ever think you'd be able to accomplish all that you've done already? Well there's no reason in the world why you can't continue on and do it again. Because you've got the power to do this. You've got the key. It's in your hands. CHOOSE it. DECIDE to do this. Enough is enough. Your life is on the line here. Is the quality of your life, never mind, the length of your life worth some over in two minutes, make you feel like crap and miserable - food???? No, no, no. Of course it isn't. Require more from yourself. Hold yourself up to a higher (& deserved) standard. Stop settling for second best when first is WELL within your reach.

And yes, set yourself up for success. Plan the heck out of your days (weekends INCLUDED). Make a vow, a pact, a contract, a commitment, a SOMETHING to stick to it no matter what. No matter what.

Get rid of the garbage. It's garbage and detrimental to your health. It's not intended for your consumption. End of sentence - PERIOD.

Stock up on healthy, good for you foods - ones that taste good AND are GOOD FOR YOU. Stop settling for foods that just taste good. That's not enough.

Scrounge around and seek out some new recipes. Make this exciting. An adventure. Challenge yourself. Discover your incredible capabilities. Make a game of it. Perhaps try the reward system. STay on plan for 3 days and then go buy a new book, a new scarf, a new bottle of nail polish. A bubble bath. Something. Do whatever it takes.

Keep yourself busy. Clean out a closet. Do a puzzle. Read, write, journal, sew, knit, scrub the floors, the toilets.

Whatever it is. Stop giving into temptation. Remember what it is you want the MOST. A happy, slim, trim, fit, energetic, productive, self confident HEALTHY you. With a cute wardrobe. ;)

Get yourself back on plan. I know for sure that you CAN do it. I know it. I know it. I know it!:hug::hug::hug:

MugCanDoIt
08-31-2009, 02:43 PM
Thanks everyone....

Onederchic
08-31-2009, 02:46 PM
:hug::hug:

CLCSC145
08-31-2009, 03:26 PM
I've been there Mug, and trust me, you don't want to go there. The food will not comfort you for more than a few minutes. It doesn't love you. It doesn't care if you've had a bad day. It doesn't want the best for you. You are binging because you are trying to find something in the food that isn't there to be found. Don't undo all you've accomplished because you can't see through the fog right now. That's just fear, exhaustion from the long battle, and uncertainty trying to get you to return to your comfort zone. If you need to do anything, hunker down, practice maintaining and not binging, and wait for the fog to clear. I know you've got it in you. If you didn't, you wouldn't have made it this far. Hang on, this feeling will pass if you don't let it seize control.

kiramira
08-31-2009, 03:38 PM
Hi there!

I totally feel for you cause I've SO been there -- you know, rocking week then completely out of control on the weekend, feeling sad and discouraged and full of self-doubt.

All I can say is this (and I think I've used this analogy before, so bear with me):
If you are trying to climb a flight of stairs and get ALMOST to the top and slip and fall down a couple, what do you do? Will you pick yourself up, dust yourself off and carry on? OR will you throw yourself down the rest of the stairs all the way to the bottom?

I think you are gonna pick yourself up and carry on. I really do. And I think you'll do this by doing just ONE thing today -- committing to your eating plan of choice 100%. Just for today. And tomorrow, you'll do the same thing. And before you know it, the todays and tomorrows will add up, and become your past. And THIS will form your new reality...

Probably doesn't make much sense (apparently I'm too philosophical for some tastes!!!!:lol:) but your reality is formed by the NOW. And if you CHOOSE right NOW to be 100% on your eating plan and recommit every day, you'll make it.

Forgive yourself the slip-up -- we've all been there, and self-loathing is SO unproductive. Move forward. Commit to your eating plan. Let the exercise come back into your life as it will (sometimes first things first works really really well). And connect who you ARE TODAY with the body you have NOW, not the body you USED to have or the body you WANT to have. Thank your body for doing all that it does for you. And just do your best.

We luvs ya!

:hug:

Kira

cfmama
08-31-2009, 05:15 PM
Just stop.

and breathe.

and breathe.

and breathe.

And tell yourself that you are STRONGER than that urge to binge. The urge to eat whatever. That you have lost ALMOST 100 FRICKING POUNDS and that you KNOW if you let go you will gain it back. You HAVE to fight this fight because no one else can do it for you!

Mug... I love ya girl. Don't do this to yourself. You are worthy of loving YOURSELF. You are.

*big hugs*

MissKoo
09-01-2009, 03:13 AM
Today was the first in a very long time that I didn't binge and I'm so happy. RockinRobin said something that stood out to me - get rid of the garbage that triggers/fuels your binge! And stocking up on good foods.

As everyone rightly said, you are doing great! Hang in there. I posted on another thread that I took the "Vow of Kindness" today! Kindness towards myself, that is (I'm plenty nice to everyone else!). If I have a food slip-up, which happens, I refuse to beat myself up about it!

I like cfmama's advice - stop, breathe, breathe, breathe.

So much great advice and kind words here. Just wanted to add my two cents and send a hug

kasmin
09-03-2009, 06:53 AM
Binging is a big flashing yellow light for me.
I find that when I start binging and can't stop, it's usually because somewhere in my life I'm being deprived of something.

With me it's often free time or affection. Maybe you' work the same way too?

I think everyone has given great advice, but I know for me personally binging isn't really about food. What susie said really struck home for me. Do you think something has something changed/happened that makes you feel more emotional or vulnerable? If so, probably just recognizing that fact will give you power over it.

Anyhow don't give up the fight! You're already winning it;)

LaurieDawn
09-03-2009, 09:25 AM
Some really great advice here, so I just want to add a personal note. I remember when you first came on here. I was doing really well with my weight loss, but you were struggling to the point where you had chosen a user name (can't remember what it was now) that reflected your discouragement. You changed your username, but I still remember you struggling with the weekend binge, though you were conquering it. Then, I left and gained all of my weight back, and now I'm back trying to fix that again. I was so thrilled when I saw how much success you have had in the interim. It is just amazing, and I'm so excited that you have beat back this monster. You are a source of inspiration for me, and if it's okay with you, I'd like to continue to be impressed by watching how successfully you've dealt with this challenge!

ubergirl
09-03-2009, 10:02 AM
I don't have anything to add, but I want you to know that I also believe that you can do and you're worth it. Look how far you've come!!! You are an inspiration to those of us who are not as far along in this journey.

Couch
09-03-2009, 10:14 AM
Originally Posted by susiemartin
Binging is a big flashing yellow light for me

Yup, me too! If I had binged three weekends in a row, it would almost certainly have some emotional issue at the core. I would be scared of the next number, or be depriving myself too much during the week, or there would be something crazy going on in my life that I just couldn't deal with, so I was numbing it with food.

Give yourself some space, stare down your emotions, and allow yourself to feel them, instead of trying to hide them under piles of food. You've got to work out what is going on in your brain. Then reinstitute all the behaviours and habits that got you this far and helped you beat the binge monster. It'll be so much easier this time, because you've done it before!