100 lb. Club - I don't understand where my oomph went




Rosinante
08-26-2009, 03:37 AM
I did so well until July. Not outrageously so, I was following a programme that worked and wasn't too taxing. I lost weight well and even lost weight while on holiday.

And then it all hit a brick wall. OK, I had that relationship blip (he still doesn't talk to me voluntarily, so I guess we close that part of my life now) but that shouldn't make such a difference. Since I got back from Spain I lost 6lbs, regained 8, lost 4, regained 6, lost 4, regained 4. I know it's no-one else's fault/responsibility but mine but day by day when I ask myself the question: Would you rather eat this X or would you rather be thinner when you go to Paris in October? I'd rather eat the X.

It sounds so wet and wimpy to say that I've lost my oomph, and I know no-one can retrieve it for me - I'll just try to make Today the day I catch it again, cos it sure as heck wasn't yesterday. :(


RMatS
08-26-2009, 03:55 AM
I'm so sorry to hear this from you. :( I know you can do it, and have been doing it for a while now. DO NOT GIVE UP. You'll gain it all back and all the work will be for nothing and you'll be so unhappy. If you're having issues, maybe focus on maintaining for now until you get your mojo back?

salsa chip
08-26-2009, 04:16 AM
What works for me (on the whole I don't know whether it's a good or bad thing, but in these situations it turns out to be a plus) is divorcing the emotional from the intellectual. So intellectually I know I have to eat 1500 a day, and the emotions that are all blah get pushed aside a bit because no matter how blah I feel, I still need to eat 1500 a day.

I guess we could call the emotional side "motivation" and the intellectual "commitment". It's the commitment that needs to be there all the time; the motivation will come and go.

Good luck with today :)


CJZee
08-26-2009, 05:45 AM
You used to be such an exuberant poster on the boards. I love-love-love to read your thoughts. Maybe by helping us again, it will help you more?

Just for today, pick one thing you will (or won't) do to stay glued to your plan. Just one. You can do this. We are counting on you to be our muse.

TraceyElaine
08-26-2009, 06:47 AM
:hug::hug:You can do this my girl! You don't want to be loosing that 100lbs for a third time in a few years do ya? You look amazing and inspire other people (like moi). You can find your oomph again. Look hard don't stop. We are all here for you.

GirlyGirlSebas
08-26-2009, 07:25 AM
I understand. I've been going through the same thing myself since May. As of this week, I'm back on-plan and have found my mojo agan. What I'm finding that works well for me is to plan my food. I start off the day knowing exactly what I'm allowed to eat. It helps.

rockinrobin
08-26-2009, 08:15 AM
All right little missy. Time to get thy arse re-ooomphed again. For me, I find I need 3 solid, "stick to it like glue no matter what" days to get me back in that groove. 3 days. One day at a time. One hour at a time. Stick to that plan of yours like glue. LIKE GLUE. No matter what. Keep yourself busy, promise yourself things, get out of the house, read, journal, clean - whatever. Just stick to that plan. Give yourself the gift of those 3 days. And I'm pretty sure at the end of those days, you will be feeling marvelous with yourself, you will be relieved. You will be firmly back on the wagon and well on your way.

These things are going to happen from time to time. I know when I'm not firmly on plan, I'm all anxious and out of sorts. I then get myself firmly back on plan and it's like the fog has lifted. I feel all delighted with myself and wonder why I ever veered off in the first place. Never mind the wonderful rewards that come with being on plan, but just BEING on plan, in and of itself is a great feeling - and comforting.

The oomph is there, so get out their and seize it. Grab a hold of it. You can do it. Why wouldn't you?

WhitePicketFences
08-26-2009, 08:34 AM
You'd rather eat X ... but you won't eat X. You just won't. Right?

Remember that it doesn't matter what you'd rather today, or what you'd rather next Monday afternoon. Because you are the plodder, and you will keep plodding.

VickieLou
08-26-2009, 08:41 AM
Rosinante Sorry to hear you"ve losted your oompha. :hug: Just think of all the walking you will want to do in Paris. The less you weigh the more walking you will be able to do. You won't get as tired and get to see more. Did you want to ask your friend to come with you to Paris? Would that smooth things over?

time2lose
08-26-2009, 08:45 AM
Such good post above, great ideas.

You have got to get your oomph back! You have done so well. I was struck by this part of your post

when I ask myself the question: Would you rather eat this X or would you rather be thinner when you go to Paris in October? I'd rather eat the X.

Maybe you are thinking too short-term? Picture yourself in 10 years, at our age we have to prepare to be healthy as we age. Instead of asking yourself the question above, ask yourself "Would you rather eat this X or would you rather still be able to travel in 10 years?"

I ask myself "Would you rather eat this X or would you rather be able to walk?" I picture myself as either an active 64 year old or as someone using a motorized chair to get around. I want to be one of those little old ladies that pass me in the walking lane!

GirlyGirlSebas
08-26-2009, 08:52 AM
I want to be one of those little old ladies that pass me in the walking lane!
Yes! Me, too. I want to enjoy my life when I retire.

Rosinante
08-26-2009, 09:11 AM
They are really great ideas and I do thank you for your support.

It's just getting out of the cage of the here and now, that I'm struggling with: of course I want to be lighter in Paris; of course I want a fit old age, ****, I'll be glad to make it to old age;my head and my heart really know what the right answer should be but I have such a carbandsugar monster on my back.

Off for a walk now to try and shake it off.

ps, kind thought but I don't want to invite the friend to France, part of this trip is to prove to myself (and no-one else) that I can manage on my own, it's a kind of right of passage affair.

JulieJ08
08-26-2009, 09:19 AM
For me, I find I need 3 solid, "stick to it like glue no matter what" days to get me back in that groove. 3 days. One day at a time. ... No matter what. ... And I'm pretty sure at the end of those days, you will be feeling marvelous with yourself, you will be relieved. You will be firmly back on the wagon and well on your way.

This is pretty much how it works for me. It helps to think of it as only a few days of "willpower" because sometimes it's thinking about resisting things forever that makes us give up. But after the three days, there's not so much resisting and willpower involved. It gets easier again.

time2lose
08-26-2009, 09:24 AM
Rosinante originally posted I have such a carbandsugar monster on my back

Oh, can I identify! Me too. The only thing that works for me is abstinence. One piece of candy, one cookie, one small slice of cake is never enough. It will just make me crave more. I am only free of the cravings if I stay completely away from them. I can deal with a small amount of carbs but there is some line that when I cross the cravings start.

I think you have to go the Robin way. Make some foods off limits. Stick with that for a few days and I think you will see this get easier!

chickiegirl
08-26-2009, 09:39 AM
Oh, Rosinante, I hear you! July was my brick wall too. Up and down, up and down.

No easy answers girl. I know you know this is something you have to re-commit to and only you can do it.

But I also know you've had huge successes and huge moments of empowerment and this is totally something you can do and can re-commit to.

Good luck pushing past this! You can absolutely do this!! :)

paris81
08-26-2009, 09:51 AM
You may rather eat X now (which I totally relate to!) but once you're in Paris, you'll be kicking yourself for all the Xs you ate, wishing you hadn't.

You can do it!

Rosinante
08-26-2009, 09:59 AM
Thanks, guys.

Look, it's even corrupted my spelling, I'm a fantastic speller, at school in Scotland they hit you until you got it right, not recommending it but it concentrated the mind:


RITE of passage!

DCHound
08-26-2009, 11:22 AM
I guess we close that part of my life now) but that shouldn't make such a difference

Uh, hello?!?! Why shouldn't it? That's pretty major, of course it makes a difference. If you think you might be depressed, maybe talk to a counselor. I think there may be a bigger issue here than weight jumping around. You are very important, you have to love yourself, take care of yourself, make time for yourself. Talk to someone if you need to. Hugs!

Rosinante
08-26-2009, 11:59 AM
Well this afternoon I've:

* rung the Silent/Missing One and had a civil conversation and arranged to do lunch next week
* created a photo album of the church, photographed the one copy of the history of it we possess and sent the whole package to a couple who visited on Sunday
* walked into town to post it, about an hour round trip
* engaged with a homeless guy selling the Big Issue, the first person who had spoken to him in over 3 hours, bought the Big Issue, of course!
* went to the supermarket, where every shelf seemed to sell something involving chocolate
* bought some fruit bars - the kind that are sort of fruit leather kind
* bought a giant chicken to roast that was half price
* bought a half price bag of salad leaves and a half price tub of prawn cocktail, because I know that cooking time is a danger time for me for snacking, so eating that now
* listened to a friend who's having problems

It's too late to go out shopping again, so I'm safe, food-wise for today. Got some fresh pineapple for after the chicken.
Day #1 Check.

SnowboundChick
08-26-2009, 02:05 PM
Glad you are getting back to it! It is hard sometimes to shack that carbandsugar monkey of our backs. I was dealing with that last week and had 3 candy bars, I haven't had a candy bar in months. It tasted good but the way it made me feel was not good! Pineapple after dinner sounds nice, I'll have to go check if they have some fresh ones at the store tonight! Hang in there love!

VickieLou
08-26-2009, 04:01 PM
Sounds like you are having a better day today. Keep Up the Good Work! :hug:

WildThings
08-26-2009, 09:58 PM
I believe my oomph has been on vacation with your oomph. It's back this week, but was on vacation for most of the month of August. I really don't know what happens sometimes, but I was starting to get very worried because that slippery slope is so hard to get back up. For me, so much of it is a matter of cutting out the sugar. If I can get rid of all the sugar, the rest usually falls into place. Part of my problem was in July, I slowly started adding fruit back into my diet. Before I knew it, I was eating little else, and still wanting more sweet stuff. It got out of control from there, so my fruit had to go away again. I miss it, but I can get all my nutrients and calories from the meat, veggies, and legumes without wanting to promise my first born just to have a little sugar.

Creeech
08-27-2009, 12:37 AM
You stole the words right out of my mouth! My oomph has flown out the window and I don't know how I'm going to get that excitement to lose weight back :( We all just need to help each other to make the right decisions everyday.

cfmama
08-27-2009, 01:01 AM
I am so glad to hear that you took that day and made it productive and healthy for you. We NEED you to be your usual vibrant self!!!! I'm looking forward to hearing how days two and three go.

Mega hugs

Rosinante
08-27-2009, 03:05 AM
Well, Day #1 wasn't so bad. Had to give some of the fruit leather to the dogs, I wanted to/did eat too much of that - but at least it wasn't chocolate.
Now on to Day #2. Had a healthy breakfast (oats and raisins); now to fill the day with non-edible activities.

rockinrobin
08-27-2009, 06:33 AM
You stole the words right out of my mouth! My oomph has flown out the window and I don't know how I'm going to get that excitement to lose weight back :( We all just need to help each other to make the right decisions everyday.

That oomph IS going to go from time to time. That's why we always say you can't rely on motivation - or even oomph. That's when you've got to, got to, got to rely on that COMMITMENT. That's what's going to FORCE you to make the right decisions, whether you want to or not. Luckily the more you make the right decisions, the quicker the oomph returns. Very cyclical.

Rosinante, day one done! Atta girl. Day 2 is looking good. Tighten it up. STICK TO THAT PLAN LIKE GLUE. Give yourself that gift. I know you won't regret it. STICK TO THAT PLAN LIKE GLUE. Allow that ooomph to work it's way back into your life.

And for now - rely on that commitment. That's what it's there for. Oh, you can rely on us too. That's what we're here for. :hug:

Couch
08-27-2009, 09:14 AM
Don't forget to add in some non-edible treats. Have a bubble bath, drink expensive tea, buy a book you've been meaning to buy.

And know that the longer you resist the carbandsugar monster, the easier it gets.

dgramie
08-27-2009, 11:38 AM
I so need to be part of this thread!! My gusto is gone also...Trying to get it back today.I have gained back 10lbs and no exercise is a big part of my problem.I need to focus on me...
Breakkfast was good..lunch is planned and so is dinner...just making sure I dont snack after dinner( something that has just started). I want this weight back off plus 40 more.

paris81
08-27-2009, 12:02 PM
That oomph IS going to go from time to time. That's why we always say you can't rely on motivation - or even oomph. That's when you've got to, got to, got to rely on that COMMITMENT. That's what's going to FORCE you to make the right decisions, whether you want to or not. Luckily the more you make the right decisions, the quicker the oomph returns. Very cyclical.


This is perfect, Robin, I never thought of it that way. Even though you might not be excited about it, as long as you're commited, you can still go through the motions to stay on plan. It might not be thrilling, but it will work. I will def have to keep this in mind!

Rosinante
08-27-2009, 05:20 PM
I'm a great believer in carrying on doing it, even when we don't feel like it, hence 'Plodder' but the past few days the urge to eat has been even stronger, obliterating not just the desire but the commitment, taking over every mental and emotional sensation.

However, Day #2 has been OK. Chicken and 3 veg. for lunch, beans and franks on toast for dinner. Maybe not the most nutritious of days but look, no chocolate.

Early night.

Thanks for all the help and support. Hope everyone else who's been oomphless is having a better time too.

cfmama
08-27-2009, 05:26 PM
Just sending you hugs and some no-cal virtual chocolate.

traci in training
08-27-2009, 06:26 PM
I totally understand the loss of motivation as I've been down that road myself to the tune of 35 pounds. And I completely agree with Robin that you have to fall back on your habits. Three days perfectly on plan creates a natural high for me, too, and the longer I go, the better I feel. That oomph is not at the bottom of the Snicker's bag - I know - I've looked there!

rockinrobin
08-27-2009, 06:29 PM
That oomph is not at the bottom of the Snicker's bag - I know - I've looked there!
:rofl:

Rosinante
08-28-2009, 04:33 AM
Virtual chocolate - roflmao!

Got to say, as I begin Day #3, that I have just a hint, a twinkle of excitement about the challenge of trying to get a 'good' day in. That's an improvement, anyway!

Today is my day off. It's also payday, so I'm going food shopping, then window-shopping at the mall. First stop - a cup of coffee while I draw up a list of things to buy. August's mistake was not having planned enough: I still want to try and do a frugal September - worth it for my Paris trip, worth it just to remind myself I can do it, worth it to try and re-coup some of the vetbill money I've had to spend in the last couple of months - but I will manage a lot better if I plan it from Day 1, rather than feel I've got no option come week 4.

Pouring rain here - but it's indoor shopping!

dgramie
08-28-2009, 07:39 AM
yesterday was a perfect day for me...I had promised hubby a pot of great nothern beans and cornbread.I had a salad while he ate them.I noticed he felt guilty that i had cooked and wasnt eating it.
He even told me to get my shoes on and we would go for a walk..so yesterday was a perfect day and I already feel great this morning.
As for chocolate....I allow myself a hersey stick when I have been on plan for the full day and have the calories left.

Rosinante
08-28-2009, 09:41 AM
Did a big shop. Loads of fruit and veg, a couple of store cupboard tins, a listings magazine and a Marie Claire (just for the oo la la), even a tiny jar of caviare because it was half price. Didn't really add up as I went but it only came to 56, about 60% of what I was expecting, and, with a bit of skill and cooking, it should last well into September.

I bought 'French women don't get fat' (1.10 incl postage on ebay). I know some people rubbish it but I thought it might amuse me. I've just skimmed it and noted a soup recipe but the flavour seems to be - eat less, move more. Yup, not radical but I like the tone of the book, so might take it on for a while just to keep me up and running.

I wore my France jackeet (that red one) and my new, navy, UK14 trousers, and I looked hot and walked hot.

All round the supermarket - not a single chocolate even whispered to me. I've gone chocolate-deaf. woot!