Hi there, I am desperatly seeking advice on weight loss/change of lifestyle.
Last time I posted here was 2 years ago when I tried to lose weight before I moved for the summer. I didn't lose the weight before the summer. I did lose it over the course of the summer. I was healthy, happy and confident.
But then I moved to London and became quite unhappy and food was there to comfort me. I ate loads for 6 months and because i didnt like the water over there i was only drinking diet cokes. When I returned home I gained all my weight back and didnt want to go out just sat in the house all summer and ate.
In September 2008 I moved back to London in the hope of losing the weight, 9 months later I'm even bigger than before. This city is amazing and has so much potential but I'm too embarassed to do anything. I avoid looking in the mirror, I don't go clubbing anymore because even though I really want to I know I would look horrific and be even more embarassed.
I try to exercise, I would say I play football on the court once a week ( soccer ) . I try to eat healthy but I skip breakfast because I'm always running late. Then when I'm at work before 10 I'll have a small bag of crisps and a bottle of water or diet coke, then for lunch i'll have some chicken and fries with mayonaise and a bit of salad, then after lunch i'll have another small bag of crips and a twix. Then on the bus home I'll buy another snack and then later have dinner and a snack after dinner. I gave up smoking in November and it has definetly made me eat more to fill the craving. Every day I wake up trying to better but I can't control it, it just takes over.
Now I'm 2 months away from starting university( I'm 21) doing a course I've worked hard for to get in to. I'm looking forward to all the parties and everything but I'm scared I won't have changed by then and will hide in my room with a bag of crisps.
I really want to lose weight, so extremely bad but its like a drug I need to fill these cravings I can't stop and I'm extremely embarassed of myself not to mention a joke to some of my friends.
Does anyone have any advice on how i can turn this around and stop my addiction?
08-08-2009, 04:32 PM
First, welcome back! :hug:
Second, you sound overwhelmed. Take a deep breath, and prioritize. By that, I mean take it one step at a time. I set out to lose (some) weight by mid-September for my trip. I thought about all these radical things I could do - exercise 2X a day, eat much less, just salads blah blah blah. It only took me one day before I realized that the plan was just not going to work. So I decided to take it one day at a time and more importantly, one STEP at a time. I exercise at least once a day, where 1 hour of exercise is just dancing to music. The other hour is "traditional" exercise - a walk, tennis or a jog. I take one day off a week with exercise. Regarding diet, I eat veggies and fruits and try to control the types of carbs I eat. The bread we eat is 12-grain or whole grain as well as any other bread-types, such as tortillas. I eat white rice, because 1 cup of it isn't too many calories (to me). I'm also controlling portion sizes. I started out with exercise and then in a couple of weeks started altering my diet once I knew I had the exercise down. Then last week, I started downsizing on my portions and not just eating because I was used to the amount. My point is, all of this was gradual. If I had done all of this at once and in the beginning, I would've no doubt given it up by now.
I would suggest you make a list of small changes you can make. Maybe buy healthy cereal bars to carry with you so you can snack on the bus or when you get to work. For lunch, maybe you can pack your own lunches or a part of them. Get the sandwich, but pack sliced carrots and cucumbers to replace the fries. Cut-up veggie snacks are easy to prepare and can be done the night before (place them in water in the frig). As you progress, think about alternative foods for the sandwich or of healthier options. To me, it sounds like your diet needs an overhaul, so attack that first. Then move on to incorporating exercise. Start out with short walks, and build up to a solid hour or walking.
You can definitely make these changes, you did it once and you can do it again! You need friends, supportive people who have gone through what you are going through now and this forum is the BEST place to find those friends! :)
08-08-2009, 05:09 PM
I am exactly the same kind of eater - I eat for comfort, I eat because I feel alone despite having many wonderful people in my life.
For me, food is a substitute for love because deep down I feel I am not worthy of being loved. And food makes me feel safe, and yes, nurtured. It never really lets you down.
I found out the hard way that this type of eating has nothing to do with making healthy choices over unhealthy ones ... it has to do with accepting that you are fine the way you are and worth being healthy and happy and thin. It's realizing food isn't a substitute for love, or comfort, or safety, or whatever your need is.
Then as you start to realize that food will never solve the problem, you will find you are more objective in your food choices. It will be easier to put down the chips, the chocolate, etc, because although you might want to taste it you no longer NEED it.
I know this sounds cliche, but it is so unfortunately true.
In the meantime, even if you are in a rush you can always make small changes that will help --- instead of the having the chicken sandwich, fries, and a bit of salad - have the chicken sandwich and a large salad, nix the fries. Instead of having crisps (this was the hardest food for me to give up), have airpopped popcorn or rice crisps or some other lower calorie alternative. Baby steps help, and make a huge difference eventually.
08-09-2009, 06:36 PM
But what do you do about the voice in your head that goes like; You must eat this, i i find shops and vending machines in the stranges places without effort. Its like I need to eat all the time.
08-09-2009, 06:41 PM
I have always felt like eating all the time. For me, it is best to break my food up over 6-7 small meals each day. If I am not eating something every 2 hours or so, I feel deprived. Yes, it is a mental thing (not meaning crazy...you get what I mean, I am sure). I don't eat full meals, just small amounts...enough to quieten that voice that tells me to eat eat eat. Eating so frequently is not for everyone and not everyone will agree but it is what works for me and it keeps me from binging and I am losing so I am happy with it.
08-09-2009, 06:42 PM
But you know deep down that you DON'T need to eat all the time. You KNOW that. We all face temptations like this is our daily lives. It is just that some of us have decided that we will fuel our bodies differently now than we did in the past. And when some of us hear that "EAT ME" voice, we REPLY with "NO, I don't NEED to eat this, so I CHOOSE not to."
It gets easier with time. You DO have the power of choice in this matter, and you will have to figure out how to deal with these temptations because, other than moving to a locked room, they'll be out there no matter where you live...
The FIRST place you might want to start is to research and choose a structured plan that will fit in with your lifestyle. This will be the key and will help you deal with the "EAT ME" voice in your head. This is what Ms Onder has done -- for HER, planned frequent meals is the key. For others, 3 meals a day is the key. It just comes down to STRUCTURE and finding something that will work for YOU.
08-09-2009, 07:47 PM
In addition to all the other great advice you've gotten and will continue to get, based on what you're eating it's possible that you are a carbohydrate addict. You may want to research Atkins or another low-carb diet and try that. Even if you don't want to be on it forever, doing the first two weeks of Atkins STRICTLY (no cheating!) will detox your system from carbs and you will see what it's like to not eat them. For me, it has made 1,000% difference in how I feel, physically and emotionally, to not eat carbs.
08-09-2009, 08:32 PM
Sounds like you're a snacker without a snacking plan :)
Snacking is actually a good way to keep your metabolism fired up all day (as long as you start eating something for breakfast ;) ) . Crisps with a side of a Twix is not a good snack even if you were in the best shape of your life!
Don't quit snacking. Just set aside an hour when you can browse a grocery store and really look at all the healthy snack options that are out there. A market has hundreds of posibilities! I bet you'll find a couple of dozen that you REALLY LIKE and that are easy to pack and take w/you.
08-09-2009, 10:46 PM
This mainly expressed your stated fear of starting to exerisize.
I was told something several years ago that really got me moving. Well you are going to uni, and know that all people are pretty much alike and that you're opinions may echo the exact thoughts of maybe 10,000 people.
In other words what you are thinking now is also being thought by 10,000 minds around you. These are also people who thinks that London has great potential but are afraid to go out there and do it.
Never fear making yourself into a leader. Don't fear being called a fat woman walking on a street because what is the dread in being seen as a roll modle for all those people out there who wish they had the guts to take to the streets?
I chickened out and rescued a little dog from the pound and started to walk the streets mid day while all the "scared" people watched out of their windows. If the scared person inside the house sees you, you encourage him or her to get out and exersise. Hey I could be doing that too! He thinks.