Weight Loss Support - Need to change my mind

View Full Version : Need to change my mind

Secret Swan
06-17-2009, 03:16 AM
Okay, so I am having a rough day. Yesterday I weighed 161, which meant I'd lost 20 lbs in what tomorrow will be six weeks. I was a little frustrated that it wasn't more, but I am aware that that is, well, stupid. That's a respectable pace, right? Also, our fitness contest at work ended Sunday, so I took a day off yesterday, because I'd promised myself one for a month. Then today I woke up feeling enormous and ugly and I weighed myself and I had gained a pound, and I know, I really know, that it is a normal fluctuation. I ate under my planned calories yesterday, so I have nothing to feel bad about. 28 under is still under. But lately I have been eating a couple hundred under, mostly unintentionally but also because I know I am disciplined enough to eat half what I plan to. I could do it and still work out, I would just feel more tired. And I don't want to think like that but isn't it better than struggling to stay under and feeling deprived? I have gone over twice in almost six weeks, both times toward the beginning when I was still figuring out what to order from restaurants. And only about 100 calories over. Lately I am having trouble eating enough, and that is bad, right? Do you all make yourselves eat some minimum amount? And doesn't that just train you to want to eat all the time? On the other hand, if I am eating like I am and am still this fat, what will I do when I totally plateau later? I know people here say to eat more at the beginning, but I don't think I can handle it. In the meantime here I am freaking out about a pound I KNOW is ephemeral, I just worked out but I feel like maybe it wasn't enough, I should go to bed but I should also eat more, and it is too late at night to want that, plus I just can't keep eating two dinners and snacks! It's gross and wrong feeling. I don't know that I have a specific question, except that I don't want to feel like this and I can't seem to talk myself down and I could use some advice on how to stay positive and sane about all this.

06-17-2009, 03:25 AM
maybe you should hide your scale up in a closet somewhere and only check it once a week. that way, you're definitely going to lose weight, and you won't notice a small fluctuation like a pound day-to-day. also, keep reminding yourself that you've lost a lot so far, and you're dedicated, and you've worked your butt off, so keep going =) one pound is nothing compared to the 20 you've lost.
also, instead of focusing on weight, you can try measuring yourself. that way you can see the inches your dropping for sure instead of worrying about the fluctuating numbers on the scale =]

06-17-2009, 03:44 AM
First of all, take a deep breath and then give yourself a huge pat on the back for losing all that weight in such a short period of time! That is awesome!

I think it takes some time for your head to catch up to your body particularly when the weight has come off so quickly.

In terms of "how" to eat . . . I really find that every person is so different that it is important for you to eat enough for you. I try not to get too caught up in numbers myself, and my focus is more on eating enough real food (fruit, veggies, lean protein, nuts etc) and asking myself during the day if I am actually hungry. And if I am hungry then I will eat. Your body does know what it needs, and often when I have felt as you seem to now it has been because I have been more focussed on "getting it right" or following a formula for weight loss rather than focussing on how I am feeling. Some days I eat less and others a lot more so I find that it all evens out. So if I have a low day I dont sweat it as eventually a day when I am ravenous will be around the corner.

I do think that the most important this is that you are feeling energetic and not deprived - I was not sure from your post if that was how you were feeling? Cutting back more than my body needs has backfired on me in the past so I am conscious of making sure I eat regularly and enjoy what I eat.

I would also spend some time celebrating your losses to date. I always think that helps as it helps us see how far we have come.

Do you have any clothes from 20lbs ago that are too big? Keep an item of clothing and try it on in the moments when you feel that perhaps you have made no progress.

06-17-2009, 08:08 AM
Hey! :wave:

You don't say what your daily calorie target is, but in any case, you should try to be consistent in your average calories. That doesn't mean you try to hit 1500 (or whatever it is) right on the nose every single day--but it does mean if you're using a tracking tool, you can look back for the past week and see that your average for the week is close to the target. There will always be fluctuations up or down, but if you give yourself limited leeway, it feels better and works out fine.

That said, yes, you should try to eat what you're supposed to. 100 cals either way may be OK as long as the average is still coming out on target. See what I mean? But you should avoid getting into a place where you want to eat less and less and exercise more and more with the idea of losing faster and faster. That's eating-disorder thinking, IMO.

Weigh once a week, so you stop driving yourself nuts with numbers. 1 pound means nothing... it means water retention, it means a need for fiber, who knows?

Plan what you will eat a day at a time, so that you make sure you are eating enough for breakfast, lunch, and snacks! :yes: Otherwise you could keep ending up late in the evening and many calories short of your target.

Also, check out the Chicks in Control forum here on 3FC. You might find some tips there. :)

Good luck!

06-17-2009, 12:30 PM
Hey Caro,
First of all :hug:. Sounds like you were in an icky place late in the evening and that is never a good way to end your day. I hope you got some zzz's and the morning light is showing a bit better picture.

1st: 20 lbs in 6 weeks is above average and AWESOME!!!! I know how much you want it to go faster but you are really doing well.

I wanted to ask you if you thought you might respond well to a professional's advice and be more comfortable that you are doing the right things if they 'prescribe' it? If so, I would encourage you to seek out a registered dietician to get some solid, science based advice to move forward in your next 20 lbs. loss. It sounds to me like you are second guessing yourself and I think you are on the right track but not confident of it. I personally don't feel most MD's have the first clue about nutrition so I wouldn't do a physician but I think if I was feeling the way you are, I'd strongly consider a couple of visits to an RD. Another consideration would be a personal coach for healthy lifestyle but that would probably be a bigger commitment. An RD would probably be able to see you 2-3 times and then maybe check back in a few months.


Secret Swan
06-17-2009, 01:14 PM
Yeah, I am feeling much better today. I overslept and so did not take time to weigh myself, and that feels okay. Also I joined a gym on Saturday and will have a free session with a trainer, and I think once I set a more official feeling exercise program for myself I will feel less anxious about that. As to eating, I don't think a nutritionist is for me right now, but I do realize that what I need to develop is a taste for moderation, so I am making that more of a priority. Thanks for the helpful words, y'all.

06-17-2009, 08:46 PM
You will feel soooooooo much better once you start exercising! I am by no means consistent at working out but when I do I always wonder why I ever stopped . . . :)