Weight Loss Support - Emotinal Abuse form My Mom/Weight Issues




PinkVS
05-29-2009, 07:10 PM
I love my mom I am 27 I live with her.....I used to be very very tiny until after I had my second child........


After my second child the name calling started probbly 2 weeks after giving birth I was called fat or told look at that mom how would it be to have her body....

She was never like this before so I dont know if its tough love for getting pregnant a second time or jelously although I highly dought a mother would feel that way


When ever she is nagging or mad at me btw most of the time I am belittleed or treated like a child by her in front of others

I on a daily basis if I breck the eggshell I am walking on I get called hefa,fatty,puddgy,rosie o donnall,roseanne barr,old,not pretty like I once was.YOU WILL NEVER BE SKINNY AGAIN.LOL you still wear maternity clothes. You are a embaressment,nobody wants you,you are mental,I despise you.MOOOOOOOOOOOSSSSSSSSSSEEEEEEEEEE.I get called every fat name or mean abusive comment you can think of and its if I disagree with her or have my opinion about something.....


I clean for her I help her out she is very ocd so I embaresses myself to ask people questions on her behalf,I would do anything to make her be nice to me....

I am 5'0 and 140-150 lbs so a little chubby I know but it hurts,and I knotice its way worse the name calling if I am working out or exercising,she really tries to hurt me with words

I am just so hurt it makes my heart hurt I have been dignaosed with Panic attaks,I get them very bad,and adrenal fatigue,high cortisol levels,My doctor said stress is to blame,I even have acne and I never had it in the past and yes I get teased for that

I am told how she dosent care if I am stressed that I have nothing to be stressed over and what she says is just words and how if I didnt piss her off so much I wouldnt get called names.....


I have litterly cried to her tears so emotinal I was throwing up from the pain,I told her how she might aswell stab me in my heart beacuse that was the pain she was causing me and she said if she had a nife and could get away with it she would love to

I am told how lucky I am to live in her home and if I am under her roof and can be treated however.

She dosent do this in front of my kids thank goodness but my kids she me depreesed and crying half the time.....

I have no social life I have not had a time to myself in 3 years...I was going to get money for a car from a close friend and she told me that was wrong to take money so I have no car aswell


whats ironic about this is my mom is very obese and I get called all this crap...

I love her and I want her to be a mom and support help and encourage me

I have no clue if menopause is to blame or pmdd :devil: As she was not like this in my teens thankgoodness

I have not had any apoligies for any of this she says thers nothing to apoligise for and its my karma. I love her so much it hurts....I wish I could have a big hug from someone and told how wonderful I am


Please no bashing my mom we all have problems I just want to know why someone would be this mean to there daughter...Its like she takes everything out thats bad in her life on me

She is a great grandma and wife she does wear the pants in there marriage though lol,but me she is very mean to..

And I would also like to know how I can manage weight loss with the stress I deal with.

Thank You please no judging...


midwife
05-29-2009, 07:12 PM
Can you move out? That behavior sounds very abusive. You deserve to be in a place where you feel safe and supported so that you can be the best mother and person you can be.

mandalinn82
05-29-2009, 07:17 PM
Can you move out? That behavior sounds very abusive. You deserve to be in a place where you feel safe and supported so that you can be the best mother and person you can be

Quoted for truth.

With no judgment on any party, it seems like you and your mom are not currently able to live together in a healthy way. So if it's possible to move out and get some distance, it might be a good idea. That sort of repeated badgering really is emotional abuse, and I'm sorry you are getting so much of it.


bargoo
05-29-2009, 07:29 PM
Do you have to stay there ? Do you have other relatives that you could live with ? Grandparents, aunts and uncles ? Is your father in the picture ?Has your mom always been way ? Could there be a medical reason for her attitude ?.

PinkVS
05-29-2009, 07:38 PM
Do you have to stay there ? Do you have other relatives that you could live with ? Grandparents, aunts and uncles ? Is your father in the picture ?Has your mom always been way ? Could there be a medical reason for her attitude ?.

Right now I do kinda need to stay here,No other family around,and I am so not the type to barge in on friends.My dad lives here aswell he puts up with her at times also,hes a quite guy that dosent really say much about anything.She became this way after my second was born and I was having problems in my marriage....I have thought it might be menopause or pmdd? The name calling is a new kinda thing in the past 2 years.

She keeps her mouth shut around my kids thank goodness she is a great grandma and wonderful to the outside world, people we know would probbly laugh in my face if I told them she is this way to me as she acts so sweet..but if its just me and her I get the words thrown at me like darts.

rockinrobin
05-29-2009, 07:38 PM
Oh sweetie, how can you possibly go on living there and taking that abuse? And it IS abuse and it's WRONG. That is a terrible, terrible environment to live in. Are you working? Do you have any money saved? Is the father of your children helping support them? Can you think of any way to move, even temporarily? FAther, grandparent, cousin, sibling, aunt, good friend?

rockinrobin
05-29-2009, 07:39 PM
We posted at the same time.

Is there any way that you can sit down and talk to her? Let her know how this is affecting you. Is there any way that she can seek out some professional help?

PinkVS
05-29-2009, 07:50 PM
Are you working? Do you have any money saved? Is the father of your children helping support them? Can you think of any way to move, even temporarily? FAther, grandparent, cousin, sibling, aunt, good friend?


Working no no car,I do have some money saved.No family around area.There father does help and supports them,he knows shes great with the kids,so hes not worried there.There really not much he can do for me as we are divorced...

Really I wish I could just brush it off but I think its the fact that its my mom thats calling me these names,that hurts...

.I say PMDD as it corralates with her menstural cycles her moodiness and the minute she gets aunt flo she is super happy (nuts I know)plus she is in the monopuse age and she has complaned of hot flashes and hows its been going on in the past 2 years....I have told her to go to the dr but she thinks shes just fine says its my problem or calls me fat for saying its pms lol

I have no clue how pmdd or menopause is?

I know if I was hurt or in trounble somehow she would be there in a flash.In my teens she was the best mom,I dont know what happend to her....She might think that if she calls me fat names I will be skinny and not end up like her I have no clue at this point

bargoo
05-29-2009, 07:50 PM
I think that your Mom should have a medical evaluation. If she hasn't always been this way, she may have a medical or mental problem, She just sounds so over the top,.I believe you need to find other living arrangements. Does children's father give you child support?

PinkVS
05-29-2009, 07:58 PM
I have talked to her she brushes it off tells me if I dont like it to leave.Really its hard on me.I know she looks down on me and the mistakes I have made in my life,could be tough love.

For all I know she could cry at night and ask god to forgive her for how she is to me,as I know she loves me but the name calling needs to stop


BTW Robin I am 5 foot nothing aswell ;) I am sure you know how 10 extra lbs can look like 20 extra so the extra weight I have plus the words just really is making me feel ugly

amynbebes
05-29-2009, 07:58 PM
I'm so sorry for the situation that you're in. It's toxic. I would be doing anything I could to find another place to live. You, heck anyone, don't deserve to be treated like that. I've been a single mom and I understand it's hard. However in order for you to be the best mom that you can be to your kids you need to be in a better emotional state and I'm afraid from what you've told us that it's not going to happen living with your mother.

Newshinyme
05-29-2009, 08:13 PM
Oh hun! :hug:
First of all, please know that NONE of this is your fault. You are beautiful and valuable, no matter what your size.
I agree with bargoo, it seems like your mom should be evaluated by a medical professional. You say she was not like that before, so it definitely raises a red flag that all of a sudden something happened that caused her to start acting differently. Maybe your dad will help you convince her that she needs to see a doctor.
Also, NOBODY should have to live with that kind of abuse. You say she does not harm the children, but I could almost guarantee you that they know something is not right and living in that kind of situation will affect them eventually.
Have you considered going to a shelter? I don't know where you live, but there must be a place where you can go to get help. Please consider it.

PinkVS
05-29-2009, 08:13 PM
I have been on a housing list for quite some time just waiting.

I have no clue how a mental illness could just start out of the blue?

I really think its hormonal related.I hope thats not how I act in 15 years,I know I would be going to the dr asap

Findmyself
05-29-2009, 08:17 PM
I am so sorry this is happening with you!!

I don't know if it is Menopause. It may have a small effect, but shouldn't cause such a dramatic change.

As to why this is happening - I know sometimes parents want children to leave the house when they are grown up. Maybe your mom is starting to see you as a burden that takes advantage of the 'parent house'.

Please don't get me wrong. I am not saying that you are a burden. But as you say that her behaviour is linked to you having second child, and you are still living with your parents, maybe it can be?

Maybe she feels that they took care of you on their own, and now, you need them to take care of your own kids. Provide your own roof over their heads etc.

I once was joking with my mom that when I have kids one day, I need to move close to her so that she can babysit. She told me flat out that she already raised her kids, and that I need to do the same. I was pretty shocked, but it is so true, though.

Maybe your mom doesn't know how to tell you that it is time to stand on your own feet, and therefore she takes it out on your weight.

Good luck, I really really know where you are coming from, but your mom sounds like a good person (except for the past 2 years) and I am just trying to understand her point of view.

rockinrobin
05-29-2009, 08:18 PM
I know you love your Mom, but that doesn't change the fact that she is in serious need of help. Is there someone that you can speak to on her behalf who may be able to get this across to her. A dear friend, sibling, relative, pastor?

And yes, us 5 footers, we're so lucky, aren't we? Any added extra weight really, really shows. But I do know that when I was 140 or 150 or even 250, I was not deserving of ANY name calling. And neither are you. This is above and beyond what any one should have to put up with.

Mom needs help. The ramifications of this kind of abuse is very scary and dangerous. SOMETHING MUST CHANGE HERE. :hug:

PinkVS
05-29-2009, 08:23 PM
You say she does not harm the children, but I could almost guarantee you that they know something is not right and living in that kind of situation will affect them eventually.
Have you considered going to a shelter? I don't know where you live, but there must be a place where you can go to get help. Please consider it.


Oh she is honestly a wonderful grandma the kids love her they ask to hang out with her they think she is funny and fun she dotes on them and just loves them ....

I know if she was ever mean to me in front of them I would be living somewhere else,I would not let my kids see anyone treat me like that,and I know she would never let them see her act like that.

She has never treated me mean in front of them,she always acts so positive around them.....The kids see me cry and I just tell them its ok for mom to cry and how sometimes kids and adults need to cry beause there sad I always let them know that they never did anything wrong to make me feel sad,and how much I love them......

rockinrobin
05-29-2009, 08:32 PM
I'm kind of thinking, that even if you were to lose weight, that there would then be something else your mom would decide to pick on you for.

And yes, it's okay to see Mom cry sometimes, but not ALL the time. Children need a happy, productive Mom. This will affect your children.

This abuse really has to be halted.

PinkVS
05-29-2009, 08:42 PM
Do I write her a letter and just tell her how she is hurting me and how I am worried about her and to go see my gyno?Do I have my Dad do it.Do I tell our pastor?I mean I dont know what to do..I mean it could be her thyroid or hormones affecting her health.


I think part of the reason I cry beside feeling picked is is that I know I am fat and having her say it so much just hurts it makes it more real..

I think if I was more active on this board it might help,or did a journal,or something..I mean really why should I be crying over being called fat I should get my butt in my room and do one of my 50 workout dvd's and show her I am a strong woman.

aneleh
05-29-2009, 08:43 PM
ok, how would you feel if your child was being treated the way your mom treats you? If someone was calling THEM names and making them feel depressed like you feel? What would you tell them to do? Put up with it, or stand up for themselves?

And sorry but pmdd or menopause is still NO excuse to make someone feel like crap like that. NO excuse. I know, I have horrible mood swings some months but I keep my mouth shut when I know hurtful things I may regret may come out.

If you're not strong enough/independent enough to stand up to your mother then do yourself a favor and stop letting her comments get to you. Next time she calls you a name, etc, YOU decide whether you want to listen to it or ignore it. You are worth it!!!

Peep Smith
05-29-2009, 08:57 PM
Dearest Pinkie, all this advice is dead-on. I'm most concerned that you are putting up this treatment and wondering what it's doing to your own sense of self-worth. First of all, remember that you are a valuable, creative, vital human being, no matter what anyone says. You are worthwhile. Never believe that food is worth more than yourself...treasure yourself and don't take refuge in eating.
Your mom sounds like she is going through something hellacious and you must pity her. There is something in her background that is making this behavior come to the front...was she abused by her parents, either verbally or physically? Yes, it could be medical, and trust me, mental conditions can strike at any age, any time. It's so important that you get her to visit a doctor.
Unfortunately, while you're under her roof she can pretty much say and do what she wants. So you've a few choices...either put up with this, or have a heart-to-heart talk with her and lay it all out there, or move out.
I'm so sorry about this. You have my total compassion.

PinkVS
05-29-2009, 09:05 PM
As hard as this is going to be I think I am going to talk to the Pastor and have him visit with her about it.Its going to be hard but I am going to have a talk with him I think it might really help if its him that talks with her.It would be great if her suggested counsiling or something he might be able to really help where as she can brush others off I dont think she would the pastor.


Thank You everyone and I will keep you updated and I will keep posting on the forums

Newshinyme
05-29-2009, 09:35 PM
I think having the pastor help you is the best route. Good luck to you, I really hope she listens to him and gets the help she needs.

rockinrobin
05-29-2009, 09:37 PM
I think having the pastor help you is the best route. Good luck to you, I really hope she listens to him and gets the help she needs.

I'm in agreement. Don't delay in talking to him though. Get this very difficult, yet very necessary, conversation going ASAP. Believe me, it's not only you that is suffering needlessly, Mom is too. And it doesn't have to be that way. :hug:

kiramira
05-29-2009, 09:41 PM
OK, given that having your pastor talk to her has happened, you need to prepare yourself to move out of this situation, and get on your own two feet.
Is your ex paying child support? The kids have the right to financial support from both parents...
Are you working? You need to find a job or get back into school to secure a future for you and your kids and you need to start saving up for an eventual move.
Are you in contact with local resources that help people in your situation?
How far along are you on an apartment list or housing list for people in your situation? Do you need to bug them some more to get things going?
These are the practicalities that you will have to deal with, your mom's issues aside. Because you can't live there forever. This doesn't mean that your mom can't be a great grandma. It just means that you, at the age of 27 with 2 kids, need to figure out how to become self sufficient, so you WON'T be reliant on an abusive person in the future. And trust me, kids are smarter than you think, and they probably already sense the tension between you two..
:hugs:
Kira

PinkVS
05-30-2009, 01:43 AM
OK, given that having your pastor talk to her has happened


I have NOT talked with the Pastor yet I will be doing that Sunday...

Is your ex paying child support? The kids have the right to financial support from both parents...

I have already stated that he is paying support and sees them on a regular basis.I have already stated that I am NOT working I do have some money,and they have there collage money and I refuse to touch that


How far along are you on an apartment list or housing list for people in your situation? Do you need to bug them some more to get things going?

I bug them daily,and its about 5 months

It just means that you, at the age of 27 with 2 kids, need to figure out how to become self sufficient

Yeah I think I know that;) but you try giving up everything to get married school,job,have 2 kids a older one with aspegers making a diet as perfect as posibble due to allergy problems for my child,speech therapy.Then having a divorce beacuse the stress was alot on my EX.You think I dont know that I feel like a failure to my loved children everyday.


so you WON'T be reliant on an abusive person in the future. And trust me, kids are smarter than you think, and they probably already sense the tension between you two..

Yes my mom might be abusive to me at times and say some really mean stuff but shes my mom and I love her.I feel like she needs some hormonal work to balance her out as she was never like this 3 years ago and she is getting in her 50's Menopause...

I know kids are smart ;)I used to own a daycare when I was first married but gave it all up when my child was diagnosed with aspergers.I dont work so I can take care of my older child full-time Whats working is natural remedys and the goverment wont pay for that so the money I have saved goes there, I do sell on ebay but I dont really know if that would be called a job .I have stayed as long as I have in my parents house as my child is very close to grandma and if you knew anything about aspergers they dont like speration,my mom is great and really helps with this.On another note they have a very big house and it makes it easier on my DC then being in a small cramped apartment


I am sure you didnt mean any harm and are trying to help but your post came off as judgemental.I am not perfect as no one is All I wanted was some advice on how to deal with the stress of my mom and weight loss at the same time. I have came to the conclusion that I will be talking with pastor as they have counsiling there that might help her.

gretchen1986
05-30-2009, 01:48 AM
I'm in strong agreeance with alot of other people here. For whatever reason, you and your mum are not compatible right now. The best thing to do would be to move out.
Your mum is bring cruel, but there must be a reason for it. You do not, under any circumstances, deserve to be treated like that. Is there any way your mum would consider some counselling, from a friend, relative, or professional?

http://www.3fatchicks.net/img/purpvinebar/sliderbug/lb/193.16/132/186.56/.png (http://www.3fatchicks.com/)

PinkVS
05-30-2009, 01:57 AM
I'm in strong agreeance with alot of other people here. For whatever reason, you and your mum are not compatible right now. The best thing to do would be to move out.
Your mum is bring cruel, but there must be a reason for it. You do not, under any circumstances, deserve to be treated like that. Is there any way your mum would consider some counselling, from a friend, relative, or professional?

Yep Sunday I am going to talk to the Pastor I know she will listen to him and there is counciling there,I am sure she will be ashamed and humiliated that I tell him but hes a good man and I know that he will be kind and help her out.

I can come up with a few resons why although I dont need to be name called

1.Being divorced and living at home with kids = stress for her

2.PMS,Menopause

3.Mad about how my life turned out and thinks she is doing tough love although I think the first 2 might be the problem.

4.The fact she was never able to have more kids after me it did start after I had my second there could be some resentment

5.She thinks calling me fat will make me skinny so I dont end up like her but really it just makes me want to eat more lol

Just a few thoughts that have went through my head on why she acts the way she acts:?:

Betony
05-30-2009, 10:03 AM
Pink, with all due respect, you're making excuses for someone abusing you. I understand that you love your mom, but you need to love you too. I hope your pastor is able to help you...both of you.

Good luck.

Tracy
05-30-2009, 10:18 AM
There is something else that is bothering her I think. For her to be so mean. But to not even apoligize.Why has she got it in for you? Is she jealous?Does she not want you living with her,and doesn't want to tell you?Maybe she feels
disappointed in how her, or your life turned out.And that is how she is dealing w/it?
I wish you the best w/this situation.:hug:

PinkVS
05-30-2009, 11:02 AM
I am so so so so so so happy :carrot:Well last night I had a hard time sleeping and I called my EX ,told him whats going on,he talked to his brother this early am and said the kids and I can move into his brothers my ex BIL basement apt on Monday,its in a nice area and the rents not to much,and they will be closer to dad...I will be talking to the Pastor today my ex will be taking me over there.I am sooooooooooo excited and feel a little weight lifted off of me.I am so happy that I will still kinda be around family and the kids wont feel so overwhelmed as they will be at there uncles house kinda.I am going to get my clothes ready wooo hoooo so happy........:dizzy:

rockinrobin
05-30-2009, 11:19 AM
Oh Pink. This is wonderful news. I hope this living arrangement works out for you for the time being. I also hope Mom gets the help she so desperately needs.

bargoo
05-30-2009, 12:34 PM
Pink that is great news ! I hope everything works out well for you.

Tracy
05-30-2009, 01:39 PM
I am happy to hear that.:goodluck:

losermom
05-30-2009, 02:09 PM
Pink, I'm so happy that you have found another living arrangement! You need to be away from your mom at this point to focus on yourself and your precious kids. Your mom needs some help. Menopause may be a factor, but it could be something else as well. I hope that she is able to get a full physical soon to get to the bottom of her behaviors.

healthfreak
05-30-2009, 03:26 PM
I think perhaps your mother is using you as her scapegoat for all of her personal problems. This is not too uncommon for close blood relatives to mistreat one another.

As with your weight loss, I think you can first start by setting up a realistic goal like I want to lose 5 pounds by the end of next month.

ADD Girl
05-30-2009, 04:29 PM
Hi! I am so greatfull to you that you have started this topic. I just came from my mums and dads house and I just hate her because she is a bad person. I thought to put a topic here but I felt bad about it as I cant say that in loud - you know like she is still my mother. BUT I DO HATE MY MOTHER. SHE CALLS ME NAMES, abused me, and makes me HATE MYSELF every time I talk to her in any way!!!

Thank you for the topic. I will post something intelegent after I cool down and think on something good to post. Now I just feel bad.

Beautiful Ace
05-30-2009, 04:34 PM
That really sucks. I went through the same kind of thing, though I was much younger. I tried to do everything I could to make it stop. In the end, moving out was my only option. It was hard, but totally worth it in the end.

ADD Girl
05-30-2009, 04:44 PM
I live in my flat for 5 years. It never stops. I hope she will die soon :-)

ADD Girl
05-30-2009, 04:53 PM
I'm kind of thinking, that even if you were to lose weight, that there would then be something else your mom would decide to pick on you for.

This is so thrue! When I have started to loose some serious weight my mother have started saying to me "you just have a stupid face. its really stupid face" - and trust me - I have a babyface that everyone likes!!!

ADD Girl
05-30-2009, 04:54 PM
I am sorry for ruined your topic. I just came from their house, forgive me please

Beautiful Ace
05-30-2009, 05:03 PM
I live in my flat for 5 years. It never stops. I hope she will die soon :-)

Aww, I know that sometimes it's hard to live with people like that, but I doubt it will bring you much joy when she dies... After everything I went through with my parents I still love them. They don't always know what they're doing wrong.

kiramira
05-30-2009, 05:03 PM
Ms Pink:
I'm so sorry that I upset you. It wasn't my intent. My intent was to sort of divide the emotional abuse issue from the "how am I going to get away from it" issue, which involves housing, earning a living, and being self-sufficient. Which would mean that you would have control over what happens to you, instead of living in an abusive environment because you have no economical choices. That's all...
So sorry to have come off as judgemental. It wasn't my intent. :(

Thank GOD you have a new place to go...

Kira

ADD Girl
05-30-2009, 05:20 PM
Ace, I admire you for that...I dont love and do not respect tham as people...as anyone else has did that to me what they did - i wolud never TALK to that person again...and I am still talking to my parents...I think I do deserve a medal for that...

Beautiful Ace
05-30-2009, 05:23 PM
Ace, I admire you for that...I dont love and do not respect tham as people...as anyone else has did that to me what they did - i wolud never TALK to that person again...and I am still talking to my parents...I think I do deserve a medal for that...

-gives you a medal-
Sorry you have to go through that.

Mahina Lani
05-30-2009, 05:46 PM
I've been there.
I moved out because I realized that I couldn't be around that and about 6 years ago I broke contact with my "mother" because moving out made her behaviour worse.

I'm glad that you've managed to find alternate living arrangements and I really hope that things get sorted between you both - you do NOT deserve to be treated that way by ANYONE.

Please, above all, please remember that you are a person of value and worth.

ADD Girl
05-30-2009, 06:11 PM
I knew you will comment on that. Forget it :-)))

I am sorry that you did not comment "you have a stupid face" part, but I guess you are not ready to face your own fears yet. Never minde, I do understand :-)

zenor77
05-30-2009, 06:40 PM
...Its like she takes everything out thats bad in her life on me


I think you've hit the nail on the head. It seems to me, she it taking out her own insecurities on you.

Move out as soon as you can. It'll not only help your stress level and self esteem, but it may just help your relationship with your mother.

EDIT: I didn't read all the posts before posting. I'm glad you have found other living arrangements! I wish you luck with your relationship with your mother.

Findmyself
05-30-2009, 09:22 PM
I live in my flat for 5 years. It never stops. I hope she will die soon :-)


ADD girl, you really have some serious mental issues.

ADD Girl
05-31-2009, 01:16 AM
Thank you for being fair!

ADD Girl
05-31-2009, 01:18 AM
[QUOTE=zenor77;2763050]I think you've hit the nail on the head. It seems to me, she it taking out her own insecurities on you.QUOTE]

I have never tought about it in this way and I do agree now when I red it. They allways have blaimed my brother and me to be a burden in their life because they got us really young. I guess this is really the core of the their problem.

Newshinyme
05-31-2009, 03:54 AM
Pink: So happy to hear that you will be moving out on Monday, you sound so relieved. Now you know you are not all alone and maybe it will give you the courage to keep moving forward. You can do this!

PinkVS
05-31-2009, 09:27 PM
Thank You everyone I decided to move my clothing and stuff there yesterday it seemed to take all day I couldnt stand being there,I needed out fast before I had a nervous breakdown.I am happy to be out the furniture there is another story,my ex bil is single so the basment that he rents is a little bachlor looking but I am still greatful I am so happy how everything worked out on short time.The kiddos do miss my parents I have been there some this weekend and she just ignored me =( but I think in the long run it will be better and I will feel better,they are having a great time with there dad and uncle though.

I did talk to the pastor he gave me a hug and said he would be talking with her so we will see what happens there.I hope everything gets better


I am so sorry for the rest of you who went through this its a hard thing to deal with ,and I cant imagine hearing stuff like that so young :hug:


Thank You again for all the kind replys :)

Jinksie
06-05-2009, 03:19 PM
You've seemed to have done the right thing by yourself and your children to have moved. If it is severe menopause, it could go on for another 8-10 years more - do you really think you could have put up with that? And just because she doesnt do it front of the children now, doesnt mean she wouldnt, or as they got older, they wouldnt know she was doing it. - Which could breed your own children to talk to you like an emotional punching bag.

Just do what you can to stay in touch with your mother, and avoid alienating her :)