Weight Loss Support - Cant get it together

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04-21-2009, 08:08 PM
I am 60 pounds overweight...I started with WW about 5 weeks ago and now I have already quit and gained all the weight back that I lost.

I am so unhappy. I dont like to go out...none of my clothes fit me...and I just feel uncomfortable in my own skin.

For some reason, my eating has been worse then ever for the past 2 weeks. When I get home from work, i eat everything that doesnt move.

I dont know where to start to get back on track...any advice?

04-21-2009, 10:00 PM
Well, first I wonder why you think you "quit". Is it because you don't plan ahead? Or because there are too many extra eating opportunities around? Does the WW plan just not work for you? Are you an emotional eater and eating because of stress? Are you not committed? Or is it something else?

I know we all struggle and for me it's about commitment. When I'm committed I make it through, but when I am committed, things are much easier.

Some people get back on track by jumping back in and changing lots of things at once. I tend to take back my control a little at a time -- and take baby steps.

So, what do you think are your issues? And what's your preference -- all at once or baby steps??

04-21-2009, 10:35 PM
Hi! First off...you can do this! You are here posting so clearly you've got something going in the right direction. Just the little bit you said I'm guessing the eating may be emotional? You've got to figure out what works for you...and commit to it! Commitment is huge! You will se that as a recuring topic around here. Is WW just not your thing? Maybe calorie counting would work. Everyone is different. I did WW online for a while because a friend nicely twisted my arm, but I just didn't enjoy it. I prefer to count calories analyze things a bit, plan ahead, make it fun....I love hanging out here for friendship, support, encouragement....

I'd suggest starting by figuring out what you want to do, plan your day ahead of time. Know when you will eat and what you will eat, when you will exercise....

There are several fun ways to keep yourself accountable in the Chicks up for a Challenge area.

I'm sort of rambling by now, but you hopefully get the idea.

Feel free to ask questions, look for ideas....

PS...what area of Philly? I'm south near the PA/DE border. :)

04-21-2009, 10:45 PM
I'm glad you posted and that you are looking at ways to approach this again.

Look at the last few weeks as a learning experience. I agree with the other ladies, can you pin down what worked? What didn't? What changes would have been helpful along the way?

Weight loss is the sum of hundreds of decisions. How can you personally maximize the chances that you will make the decisions that you plan/want to make? I find that I have more success when I plan out my food and exercise in advance. I have also developed a mantra lately that is helpful---when I am considering making a choice that is not on my plan, I say "This is the kind of choice where the rubber meets the road." For me, that means the choice does count, has consequences and can move me closer or further from my goals. Our bodies reflect the sum of our daily choices. It is the small decisions that drive our success.

Never doubt that you have the power to make your choices for health.

04-21-2009, 11:10 PM
I am so unhappy. I dont like to go out...none of my clothes fit me...and I just feel uncomfortable in my own skin.

For me steady, consistent weight loss could not occur until I reached the point where the desire to be thin, fit and healthy OUTWEIGHED the desire for the food. That was a very great place to finally be. Because then I was WILLING, more then WILLING to do what was necessary to lose the weight permanently. I was WILLING to stick to my plan. Because I wanted to be thin MORE THEN I wanted the food.

For some reason, my eating has been worse then ever for the past 2 weeks. When I get home from work, i eat everything that doesnt move.

I dont know where to start to get back on track...any advice?

For starters, I'd get everything out of the house that doesn't move. No, really, get rid of the junk!!!! You can't eat it if it's not there. And by all means have a PLAN in place. Set yourself up for success. Have good healthy foods to come home to, so that when you feel the need to eat it will be something healthy.

I'd also eat a light healthy snack BEFORE I got home, so as not to be ravenous when you arrive.

But probably the very, very first place to start would be with the DECISION to lose the weight. DECIDE to lose the weight. And then make that COMMITMENT that Heather spoke about. :hug:

04-22-2009, 12:39 AM

It helped me to make a list of all the reasons that I wanted to be thin. I still have that list on my bedstand. I read it every morning before I get dressed. I also have the list in my vehicle and I read it every night before I get out the vehicle after work. It reminds me of all the reasons I want to be thin more than I want the food (like Rockin Robin states). It helps me to stay committed, focused, and on plan during weak moments.

I have also learned to repeatedly give myself credit along the way for making good food choices, exercising, and for falling down and standing back up if I temporarily go off plan. By continually giving myself credit my confidence builds. This helps me conquer plateaus when weight loss does not occur. It's different this time...it will not matter a few years from now how long it took, I need to remind myself why it's important to lose weight slowly. My long term success depends on it!

Best wishes...the best things in life are never easy, they are worth working for, accept the challenge!

04-22-2009, 12:40 AM
I like what rockinrobin said about the desire to be thin outweighing the desire for food. That really is the point you have to reach not to give in to all the temptation out there. With that said, I helped myself a great deal when I cut way back on processed foods. I pretty much eat whole foods now, with a balance of protein, complex carbs, and good fats, and they are so much more fulfilling. I no longer suffer from bad cravings. I also gave up soft drinks completely and drink only water and hot green tea. It wasn't easy the first few days, but now, it's just what I do. It's for life.

04-22-2009, 12:42 AM
It sounds like you are "panic eating" -- we've all done it -- the "OMG I'm HUGE! What am I going to DO? I better eat a donut, cause that'll distract me for now..." The best thing to do about the situation is to JUST. DO. SOMETHING. I didn't wait for the ideal time or for me to feel at my best -- I just took the big step of doing something about it because I was sick of feeling the way that I did, and nothing else was going to make a difference. SO, close your eyes (mentally) and make the decision that you are going to find a structured plan that will work for you, and then just do it! You don't need to be "prepared psychologically" first in order to do this. You just. plain. old. do. it. You can work on the other stuff while you are getting your diet and exercise in order.
I've so been there, and this is what has helped for me.

04-22-2009, 04:21 AM
Hey girl! *aaneri*

Please let us know what it was that caused you to temporarily go off the rails :(

we're here to help!

~ tea

04-22-2009, 05:40 AM
Hello *aaneri*
You should do some lose weight plan, and you abide your plan, I think you will gain a good result.

04-22-2009, 08:09 AM
My gut reaction to your post was that WW was not fitting into your lifestyle if you quit after only 5 weeks. Did you do "too much, too soon"? Maybe the plan you were following was too extreme for your body, and you rebelled.

Try counting calories -- it works like WW, but it's free! And make small changes, baby steps, to tweak your diet. You won't be as likely to rebel when the changes are very small and manageable.

04-22-2009, 09:45 AM
Hello all,

I want to thank you all so much for your posts. I am reading your posts and they are bringing me to tears because I love all the support.

I hear what you are all saying and I agree...I need to MAKE A COMMITMENT...and then figure out how I am going to do this.

I think what I need to have is a plan of how I am going to lose weight...I always think that writing down what I eat is SUCH A PAIN...and writing reminders to myself about why I want to lose weight is corney...but...obviously I need to find something that works for me.

I have to assume that I am over weight watchers. I have joined WW about 10 times in the last year and quit. The only thing I like about WW is that it forces me to get on the scale once a week.

I did read Beck's Book (cognitive behavioral therapy) and I still have the materials. The cards are sitting next to me in my desk right now.

I either want to start counting calories or eating 6 small meals a day. However, I have found it difficult to find information on eating 6 smalls meals a day. Anyone have any advice for this?

All I DO KNOW is that I cant go on like this for much longer. I dont even like showering anymore because I cant stand to have to look at myself. I am 27 years old and I cant believe I have let myself get like this.

My plan for today is to read my cards and then write down what I am going to eat.

Thank you all for your kind words!!

04-22-2009, 09:56 AM
I don't do anything specific, I just count calories. If it isn't in my calorie budget, I don't eat it. I don't just eat what I want, though. I eat about 5 small meals a day, sometimes 6. So I eat like this, breakfast, snack, lunch, snack, dinner, somtimes a snack. I usually don't eat a snack after dinner because I don't like having food on my stomach or feeling full after 8pm, that's just me. Most of my calories come at lunch because I usually workout around 3 or 4pm, so I need that energy to power through my workouts.

It looks like the thing you liked most about WW, you can do yourself. You can still weigh yourself every week, just go to a gym with a scale or if you can handle it, buy scale and do it that way. You can do this, make a commitment!

04-22-2009, 10:01 AM
How do I determine how many calories I need per day?

Also, my cravings at night after dinner are really strong and I always want something sweet. Any advice?

04-22-2009, 10:25 AM
It sounds like WW is not a good fit for you.

I think sometimes and I've experienced this a little bit myself, people who are dieting get tired and want a break. However, the break lasts, you know "I'll start back on Monday"...I've been saying that to myself a lot lately and that makes NO sense to me, yet I found myself doing it. I realized I was tired of trying to do this and was in this dieter frame of mind, which doesn't work for me personally. I need to focus on changing my lifestyle and I have made significant changes that are now apart of my lifestyle. Even still, it can be overwhelming to have to learn how to take care of myself! lol

For me personally, I've identified where my issues are and working through them is a real challenge for me. However, it is my challenge and I'm not one of those people who like WW or ediets, jennycraig, or whatever. I don't fit into that. I'm very stubborn and want my life to be MY way lol.

Maybe you're one of those people who could make small changes and see how it goes. Maybe another program would work for you...it really is what you want as you know yourself.

You can do it, we all can. :D

04-22-2009, 10:32 AM
aaneri, I went to myfitnesspal.com to see what they recommended my daily caloric intake should be. Generally, I stay around 1400-1600 per day. On the days I work out, I eat more calories-closer to 1600 or even 1700, when I don't I'm on the low end of 1400. For a night snack, since you like sweets, eat like 10 or 15 green grapes. Those are really sweet. You just have to change things slowly, see how that works for you, tweak your diet and exercise as you go along. it will come, be patient and committed. Thats all you really need right now, commitment.

04-22-2009, 10:54 AM
Hi Aaneri! It's great you posted and take heart that this is a journey :-) I have a friend who loves weight watchers but it's not for me. I too get emotional, and that wrecks my diets. By counting calories with an online tool (I use fitday.com) I have been able to make my commitment stick even those days I feel fat! I've only lost my first (almost... ".8" to go) 10 lbs but it is following the little goal bar just like it's supposed to. So the laws of weight loss do work! Just like physics. Grin. As devsmama says - a tool like that lets you record you lifestyle (to determine how many calories you naturally burn), the weight you are, the weight you want to be, and then the date to get there. Then it shows you the daily "calorie deficit" and finally the calories you should be aiming for. For me it was 1280. So even when I have a really down day I can look at the numbers of what I ate and know I'm okay. I can also play with them when I overeat - see that okay, I washed the car today, so yes, I can have that extra minimeal! One day I went to a party and thought OMG I pigged out. But I went back to the tool and put in everything accurately and discovered I'd only overeaten by about 300 calories after all. And if you go by the rule of 3500 = 1 lb then I realized heck, the most I did was sabotage myself by like 1/10th of a lb. And I wouldn't have gained it, just not lost it. That put everything in perspective.

You're only 27, and at 42 while I wasn't having any symptoms of it, I probably am moving into perimenopause. My "big discovery" was being turned onto natural progesterone cream at our local natural health food store (the employees are very well-trained). I did some research and discovered I have probably been high in estrogen all my life. That it wasn't balanced with the progesterone. I never could take even the lowest dosage birth control without it making me suicidal after a month and I never ever resolved my acne problem. I really thought I was bipolar. Mix in diet pills and not eating healthy and drinking too much - I never got it right. However at the beginning of the year after another two weeks of **** right before my period of crying and feeling like the world was ending I got turned onto the cream (you use it for two weeks out of the month). Immediately I was better. My acne cleared up and while I still have some mood swings, nothing out of control. And my cravings - they were suddenly for the first time in my life manageable. So a month ago I finally started on a realistic diet and it's working!

I agree with the other women here - 1) it's about coming to a place that it is more painful to eat than not and 2) finding the unique combination of tools and plan that will work for YOU, but I have to also add you might consider getting your hormones checked out. I have come to believe that I probably had a slight imbalance and that slight "off" was what made me crazy and let my cravings control my behaviors. If it's a man telling me it's all about willpower I'll kick him hard in the shins. We are complicated mechanisms made up of chemicals.

I'll also add in my last two cents - I think eating "healthy" is key to it, too - to make it a lifestyle change and show yourself that you are loving yourself - not depriving yourself. Get excited about filling yourself up with nutrition. I hope you keep posting and keep going! Don't negate the weight loss you've made, either. I see you still have kept off 7 lbs Just pick up 7 lbs of groceries! See - that's a lot of weight you AREN'T carrying around from when you started. HUGS!

04-22-2009, 11:01 AM
I think eating "healthy" is key to it, too - to make it a lifestyle change and show yourself that you are loving yourself - not depriving yourself. Get excited about filling yourself up with nutrition.

That's it. In a nut shell. Don't DREAD this lifestyle. Embrace it. Get excited about it. Because it's EXCITING. It's marvelous to treat yourself and your body with the very best life has to offer. Eating healthy and carefully and mindfully is NOT deprivation. It is just the opposite. Eating too much and the wrong foods - THAT"S deprivation. Eat poorly = feel poorly. Eat healthy = FEEL healthy = BE healthy. Exciting! Exciting! Exciting!

04-22-2009, 11:01 AM
I agree, Jacquie, I think I need to find "my own way" to do this.

How do you all journal your food? Do you do it online or do you have a notebook?

04-22-2009, 11:06 AM
Hey there, I just started trying to get healthier in mid January. I am doing weight watchers but that doesn't work for everyone. Some things that have helped though is when I started this I cleaned out my cabinets, freezer and refrigerator. I sent all the junk and a lot of the processed foods to my parents and got it out of my house. If it's not there I can't eat it.

I look for stuff in the grocery store to eat as a snack that are lower in calories higher in fiber, low in fat, etc. Fruit is good, if you're like me though sometimes when you want something sweet fruit just doesn't quite fill the bill, find some muffin mixes that are lower in calories and fat and then use apple sauce instead of oil if it's called for and lower it even more.

I've also found that planning ahead (mainly in my head) what I will have for meals over the next couple of days helps a lot!!! So, at lunch I already know approximately how many points I am having for dinner and can adjust things if I need to or have more at lunch if I"m really hungry.

Basically, figure out what you can live with and just do it.

Good luck!!

04-22-2009, 11:08 AM
Hey Bobble,

I know that my "chemistry" has something to do with the struggles I am having. I have been dealing with anxiety and depression for about 7 years. I have also been on the same medication for about 7 years and I am wondering if that is losing its effect. I am going to see a new therapist on April 30th and I am hoping she will have some insight.

I have been to my PCP about my weight problem and she is so arrogant. She gives me the "diet and exercise" speech. However, I am also worried there is something more to it then this. I am wondering if maybe I should go back to her.

I think another problem is that I crave sugar because I eat so much of it. I have been considering one of those cleansing drinks...can anyone reccomend one of these?


04-22-2009, 11:35 AM
The only cleansing drink I recommend is water or water with some lemon. I think once you start eating healthy, those cravings will go away. I know they did for me. I had an insatiable sweet tooth, I mean it was absolutely awful. I could eat 4 candy bars in one sitting and then get some of those caramel creme things to wash down the candy bars. That was the biggest hurdle for me. Now I eat fruit and this morning for the first time, my applesauce snack was too sweet! It is healthy harvest, no sugar added...lol..

I log onto fatsecret.com and journal there, but I write my goals in a notebook that I carry with me daily, I have all kinds of things in there, like prayers, notes to myself, my goals (those are personal and for my eyes only).

04-22-2009, 12:06 PM
Thanks everyone...so far so good for the day...trying to drink lots of water...wondering if that will help with the cravings.

I have a long night coming up tonight...i leave work at 2:15 and then sit in class from 3:15 to 9:15 and I always want to eat the vending machine while im sitting in class...usually end up getting pretzels and eating all the salt at the bottom of the bag...will not do that tonight!

04-22-2009, 12:18 PM
I agree, Jacquie, I think I need to find "my own way" to do this.

How do you all journal your food? Do you do it online or do you have a notebook?

Personally, I haven't found a solution that fits me. I'm not willing to shell out money for some sort of software that will do it, but then again a simple notebook doesn't seem to work either. I don't fit into the Spark People...I'm vegan/raw food and when I did try that I found it didn't work for me personally for various reasons. I immediately got frustrated with it because I couldn't input my data properly or in a way that would benefit me.

Maybe I should buy a journal, something girly that I can get at Staples, and just document that way. I need to, I've been trying. I really do need to journal my food for health reasons. I have food intolerances, I want to know how I felt when I ate something and I do think having it down will help me not only track what I'm eating, but also let me see how food affects me.

I just don't like overly complicated things. I'm fussy! lol

04-22-2009, 12:44 PM
I have a long night coming up tonight...i leave work at 2:15 and then sit in class from 3:15 to 9:15 and I always want to eat the vending machine while im sitting in class...usually end up getting pretzels and eating all the salt at the bottom of the bag...will not do that tonight!

Bring a snack with you. A bottle of water. Baby carrots, grape tomatoes. An apple. Even a yogurt is transportable. Be prepared. That is the key. Have a plan in place. Look at where you go "wrong" and find ways to "fix" it.

04-22-2009, 12:47 PM
aanen, I am one that had tried all the diets and paid good money for it, only to gain it back. This time I decided I wasn't going to pay somebody to tell me what to eat. I count calories which works well for me. I like the flexibility and it is something you can use to maintain. It helped me to take it in 10 pound increments. It was too overwhelming to think I needed to lose 80 pounds. I lost 10., then moved one to the next 10. This worked for me.
I also eat 6 times a day, not 6 meals, 6 times. About every 3 hours I eat. Breakfst, snack. lunch, snack. dinner, snack. My snacks are usually 100 calories or less, such as non fat yogurt, Laughing Cow Lite cheese wedge, apple or orange, sugar free jello or sugar free pudding there are many options.

04-22-2009, 12:55 PM
you have to find what works for you WW may have to much freedom, calorie counting may not take the weight off quick enough, but never QUIT. You deserve better. Plan Ahead is what works for me. It keeps me from snacking and it has actually saved me money. There is no guess work and I never let my fruits and veggies go bad because I know what I need to eat everyday. I weigh and measure my foods which is a real eye opener because you have no idea how much a serving really is just by guessing. Just take small steps at first and before you know it you will find what works for you . Good Luck