Weight Loss Support - So fustrating,Why?? ARRRGGHHH!!!

View Full Version : So fustrating,Why?? ARRRGGHHH!!!

03-11-2009, 05:35 PM
Everyone in my house is losing weight together which is great motivation but its also quite competative and iam getting really fustrated!
We all eat healthy i cook super healthy meals every evening but iam the only one in the house excersising,been going gym four times a week and running,Iam also the only one who doesnt cheat,they drink alcohol and often cheat with sausage rolls or crisps,i dont touch anything unhealthy and they are losing weight when i dont and its so FUSTRATING!!!!!
It makes me disheartened and want to give up.We have all lost over 1 and half stone and iam happy with what ive achived but also so annoying when they lose larger amounts with out trying and i bust a gut and lose 1lbs!! Does anyone know why???
They are both men who weigh 15 stone iam a female weighing just over 11 stone is it because i got less to lose?so its harder? or maybe because i already lost 6 stone a few years ago and have put 2 stone back on losing it seems harder now,yo-yo dieting ruin metabolisum?? HELP!!!

03-11-2009, 05:47 PM
It's because they are male and because they have more weight to lose. You should be happy about any weight lost. Over time it will be the larger amount that you want.

03-11-2009, 07:05 PM
You've got to try to remember that competition and frustration are both choices. I know it doesn't feel like a choice, it just feels like a spontaneous emotion, but you can talk yourself out of both.

It's rarely productive to compare your loss to anyone else's, because even a woman the same age, height and weight, with a very similar life, behavior and environmental history as you, might stil lose at a different rate than you. Comparing yourself to anybody is a comparison of apples and oranges. Under the best of circumstances it's a bad idea, and trying to compare yourself to men with larger amounts of weight to lose, is doomed to disappoint.

03-11-2009, 07:15 PM
Is this some sort of contest or are you doing this for YOU! :)

Just stick with it and keep going that's the secret you HAVE to just keep going! If you are eating right and exercising it will show in the end!

03-11-2009, 07:19 PM
I know,thanks i know its stupid to compare as i know heavier men can eat more just disheartning when your busting gut in gym every other day and they are sooo lazy and lose weight quicker!!

03-11-2009, 07:34 PM
It's only disheartening if you looking at only the pounds (the smallest part of the weight/health picture). You're not even comparing percentage of body weight lost (which still would be an unfair comparison - percentage of the total needed to lose, would be a better, but still flawed comparison).

As for the gender issue, men also die younger (at virtually all ages) than women, and especially from obesity related illness. When they gain weight it's almost always primarily belly and organ fat (the most unhealthy place and way to carry fat). They're more prone (at least compared to premenopausal women) to obesity related or obesity worsened illness (heart disease, hypertension, diabetes....), and pound for pound, fat may be healthier on a woman than a man (at least, if it's carried on the hips in greater proportion than the waist). Women's premenopausal hormones protect them, to a large degree from heart disease, so a fat young woman is safer from heart attack than a fat young man (old men and old women have simiar risks).

Mildly overweight men, on average, do have fewer social disadvantages than mildly overweight women. However, extremely overweight men may actually have more social disadvantages than extrememly overweight women (there are far more men interested in dating very fat women, than women interested in dating very fat men - maybe it's because women are less prone to "fetishes" (or to admit them) than men.

Fair is always in the eye of the beholder, because you can pick and choose what you compare in order to prove unfairness. It doesn't have to seem frustrating or unfair unless you let it.

03-11-2009, 07:35 PM
I actually compete with my husband--that is, I try to keep up with the pace he sets in weight loss. I have to work much harder than he does: I need to be more perfectly on plan, count calories, limit myself, and exercise much more. Doing all that, I can juuuuuuuust barely keep up with him.

But I actually find it fun. Yeah, it's not "fair" that I have to work hard and he doesn't, but c'est la weight loss. Since I'm the one who's taught him everything he knows about good nutrition and exercise, I take credit for HIS loss, too ;) Meaning, to date I've lost about 140 pounds, not just the mere 70 I've worked for! :D