30-Somethings - Looking for a little encouragement... new to the site!




skinnychicagogirl
03-09-2009, 12:07 AM
Hello everyone,

I'm actually 29 but I hope it's OK I 'crashed' the 30-something forum. I'll be 30 in 6 months, close enough, right? I actually chose this forum as I thought you may be more likely to understand me...

I am having an incredibly hard time right now... and hoping this site will help me find that inner fire that used to propel me through it.

In a nutshell... I have done weight watchers on and off for 7 years. When I actually follow it (and don't cheat by "forgetting" to write stuff, or "underestimating" points "accidentally on purpose") I lose weight and it works for me. I worry that I know how to cheat the system, and therefore myself, too well that I want to try something new. HOWEVER... if I cheat the system, as I said, I am only cheating myself, right? So it's not just a matter of another sytem, I'd learn to "cheat" that too.

I am not incredibly over weight, just about 10-20 lbs above where I'd like to be. My goal says 145 but honestly, if I got to 150 I'd be thrilled. I did it in my 20's and I know I can do it again.

My life is hectic, and to all you moms out there, I know my life won't even sound nearly as demanding as yours so maybe your incredible words of wisdom will help? I have an incredibly demanding job that has literally been sucking the energy out of me. It is high pressure all the time - and with the economy I need to just be thankful to have a job... it's fire drills all day long and politics that have spiraled out of control. I'm also in school for my masters part-time - which work is paying for. So - I can not leave even if I wanted to, which in this economy I would be insane to consider. Problem is, when I feel trapped I feel helpless and I fear that is trickling into my dieting issues. School is also killing me - I have class until 9pm 2 nights a week and spend most of Saturday or Sunday doing homework. The other nights I"m not in class I'm usually at work until at least 8 - so "me time" is at a minimum and it is really wearing on me. I don't want to quit school, my masters is a dream and goal of mine and I know if I didn't finish it, I would wake up in 10 years KICKING myself for it.

I just got back in the swing of exercising more consistently this past week but fell apart this weekend. I was just so... TIRED. I worked out 5 days during the week so I don't feel too bad to be honest.

My eating is the issue. I recently heard someone say "if you want to get fit, it happens in the gym, if you want to get thin it happens in the kitchen" SO TRUE. Problem is with school and late nights, it's tough to make the best choices. even when I do plan ahead, I have a horrible stress-eating issue and come home after a stressful 13-15 hour day (gym, work, school 630am - 930pm - if no gym, at least 830-930) and even though I ate before class at 5pm and usually a snack around 730 pm I just eat, eat eat when I get home... to wash away the stress. On weekends I find myself pacing the kitchen, eating anything I can to avoid doing homework. It bothers me terribly... i have so much that I do well in life, why in the world can't i control my eating? I am otherwise a normal 29-year old career woman - who is highly respected at work - but I eat and eat and eat... and then I feel guilty so I eat some more.

i keep saying "tomorrow I'll follow points" and I do fine until 230 or 3 when fatigue and stress set in and kabam! Even if I do pack healthy snacks i just chow. And when I say eat eat eat - I don't mean fries, cakes, etc. I eat healthier food, just a ton of it... I have been known to polish off 3 yogurts and 3 granola bars in a sitting. Yeah, not so healthy when you eat 3 at a time.

I tried giving up diet soda thinking the artificial sweeteners were to blame, but I just can't seem to kick that habit.

I gave up coffee for a while but honestly, i sometimes need it just to get through the days I'm so tired.

so, I know motivation has to come from within but am hopeful that someone will have advice, a story to share, or just say something that will inspire me to "step away from the kitchen" and put down the 2nd granola bar before it becomes the 3rd.

Thanks in advance -


LBH
03-09-2009, 11:02 AM
Hi Skinny! :welcome2: You sound a lot like me on WW. I know how to cheat the system and get mad at myself when I do. Those little BLT's get me in trouble all the time. You'll find lots of support here!

daydreamer
03-09-2009, 11:14 AM
I'm not sure I have much advice. You sound like a lot of other people though. You are definitely NOT alone in your stress eating. Food controls so many of us. You seem to have the motivation to do this. Now you need to COMMIT to it. Those are two very different things, and unfortunately, you are the only one that can find that commitment. I think you can do it, though. You've committed to getting your masters, and to your career..... so you CAN do it!


Iheartsushi418
03-09-2009, 02:04 PM
For your energy, try taking a b complex vitamin...I swear it is a little engine in capsule form.

For the eating, just make your kitchen a no fail zone. Don't buy unhealthy snacks, keep lots of fresh fruit around etc.

For your workout and the stress you are under, you could try a couple of things. Take a walk on your lunch break to clear your head. Make your workout "me" time. There is nothing better for your mental or physical well being than working out. It is just a matter of how you look at it. Sure you might like to go get a mani/pedi, or massage or something but the truth is, if you change the way you look at working out, you would prefer the gym to the spa. Maybe it is because I am a mom and working out is about the only time I get "alone", but trust me, flipping that switch in your mind is the key to it. With school, I found it's best to multi-task in a way. I would read my material and notes into my mp3 player and then listen to it while I was working out or commuting to work. If I had a paper to write, I would dictate my ideas into the mp3 player. It made writing the paper that much faster.
If you want a veg day where you just camp out in front of the tv after work, then that is fine too. Do some activity during commercials. I also watch movies on my computer while I am on the treadmill. Most importantly, just be realistic about your time. Like with a food journal, if you have time journal, you will see where you could have made better choices with your time.

Bella70
03-10-2009, 07:58 PM
I just joined myself and I understand where your coming from! I work odd hours 1130-8pm at night I work at a call center and I eat when i get home im usually starved by then. I bring some stuff with me but I need to get back on the weight watchers points again I did that and I did lose the weight but I stopped and I stopped going to the gym I used to go 5 days a week I practically lived there I would stay there for about 4 hours now with this job im lucky to get in there before 1130 in the morning and im not a morning person really so to go to the gym that early is hard. If you do your homework in the kitchen do it in your bedroom instead keep away from the kitchen! lol. Make sure you eat something like a piece of fruit and fill up on water even keep some fruit in your room so you dont have to step in the kitchen and say mmm what else can I have and they we start hunting lol. Hopefully that will help. I draw faries alot and if im in the kitchen doing this I feel that I want some kinda snack even tho im not really hungry its just something to put in my mouth. Kitchens can be EVIL! lol. Hope this will help you a little. :)

skinnychicagogirl
03-10-2009, 10:31 PM
thanks everyone! you are so nice!!! I know I need to just DIG DOWN and find it within me... it's there... Oh, I know it is. I did great on points and working out today, day 1 done. i keep telling myself it's only hard for a week. then it becomes habit. i need one week... one success... one week where I see the number go down, feel skinnier, feel GOOD... and that is the motivation I need to keep going... one week... 7 days... it's finals this week but I can do it!

Mollz
03-10-2009, 11:12 PM
At the end of the day, that's all you can do is *find* the motivation within yourself. I'm turning 30 in September, and my party is a Rocky Horror/1950s and 1960s Sci-Fi party. I plan on going as Janet... now you see why I need to lose the weight! For those of you not familiar with the Rocky Horror Picture Show, Janet runs around in her bra and a half-slip for most of the movie.

Skinnychicagogirl: even if you find your weight goes up (sometimes it will!), don't be too discouraged. Track your own weight every week when you weigh in. Make a graph up with your starting weight at the top and goal at the bottom (in maybe 1/4 pound increments) and plot it every week. When you gain, look at the graph, plot your weight and look at how much you've LOST, rather than what you might have gained. Remind yourself that the gain is a blip on the radar.

I get motivated looking at my progress every week- I see the downward trend and I think "****, I have done all this work already; I might as well finish it".

But I find the best thing for me to start losing was to change my attitude: I have left the words "don't", "can't", "not", "no", "try", "perfect" and "hope" out of my weight-loss vocabulary. Try just means to fail (Do, or do not, there is no try- Yoda had it right all along). Being perfect is an ever-moving and ever-shifting target. Hope is the absolutely LAST thing you can cling to when you have nothing else left in the world. I use words like "expect" and "will": I expect to (I will) lose weight tomorrow and until I finish my weight-loss. Positive thinking is the best "super-power" we have.

Cheers.
Mollz :boxing:

skinnychicagogirl
03-10-2009, 11:18 PM
thanks! you are right... I like the idea of removing those words. I know 'i will try' means 'i won't' - that lesson, I have learned.

my 30th is also in september... not sure what the party will be, but it'll be BIG. What a great present if I could lose 20 lbs by then. Totally doable, it's 28 weeks away! One lb a week plus a few ups... totally doable. I'm making a new goal for myself, come to think of it! 20 by my 30th b-day! The best gift i could give to myself is entering my 30's at a good weight. 148. Doable. And 10 by Memorial Day - about half way... start the summer right.

Thanks - your post encouraged me to set a firm goal. I WILL lose 20 lbs in time for my 30th b-day party, and I WILL lose 10 by Memorial Day. I have a family wedding memorial day, this is also great motivation!!

bindersbee
03-11-2009, 12:17 AM
Iheartsushi has some awesome multi-tasking ideas. Since you are VERY busy, I think the idea of having to 'go to the gym' might be too much. I like the idea of walking on your lunch hour or you could buy some good videos (like Turbo Jam) to do at home. That will cut out the drive to and from the gym and also the excuses that the extra time creates.

I was doing so well with working out UNTIL I joined the gym. When I did home workouts, I just got up and did them. It was easier to find time. Now it's like I have to make additional time to go someplace to exercise and between the time and the kids, it isn't happening. I was better off just working out at home. Now my mojo is all messed up.

Perhaps you can take the pressure off about having to do intense exercise right now. Walking or home workouts are a decent start and when your school schedule clears you could add the gym and consider it a reward.

Also, I love doing punching, kicking, dancing type moves to good butt kicking music. That might be a great way to relieve some of the stress from work that you are currently eating to solve- and you don't need to go anywhere to do it. If the stress/craving comes on, put 'Fighter' in the MP3 player and start kicking some butt instead.

lefky13
03-11-2009, 12:29 AM
Something thats really helped me lose weight recently has been joining a women's football team. If that sounds too extreme for you, I understand - but there's something about the team environment that makes me want to try.

Is it bad that I am more concerned with letting down my team mates rather than myself?

chubby girl 79
03-16-2009, 12:00 PM
skinnychicagogirl: I can totally relate. Even though I have a LOT more weight to lose than you, I can play the system with the best of them.

I'm new to the site and almost 30 as well.....the day of doom occurs in August.

I have /tried/ every diet that I have ever heard of but have decided that if I want to make this work and stick with it, it has to be something that I don't cheat on. I just have to make allowances for when I do actually cheat.

I have just decided that since I put myself on a financial budget and I have no choice but to stick to that, I incorporated a calorie budget as well. I started tracking everything and I mean EVERYTHING I put into my system, up to and including every single can of diet coke I crack open at work.

When I'm really hungry and I know that I /shouldn't be eating/ I try and curb the craving for a snack w/water. If that doesn't work I have a bag of healthy snacks that I keep in my desk for my mid morning/afternoon case of the munchies. I especially like the 100 calorie packs of popcorn, you don't realize how much you can eat for so few calories as long as it isn't laden with the buttery crap!

Mollz: I think it's great that you are excited for your 30 b-day party and have a healthy and attainable goal!

lefky13: I wish we had similar teams like that here in Indiana...unless it's associated with IUP and full of a bunch of college freshman the programs usually don't run! And as far as being more concerned w/letting others down rather than ourselves I think that's just part of being a girl :)