Weight Loss Support - Keep it in or let it out? Shortcomings

02-17-2009, 03:16 PM
Do you guys keep your little weight loss secrets in or do you let them out. I used to keep them in a lot more but with this forum and blogging and whatever, I have found that really telling it like it is about a recent binge or a big mess up on program gets me back on track faster.

What about you? Do you keep it in or let it out.;)

02-17-2009, 03:49 PM
sometimes it depends on what it is. i often blog things cos it really does help

02-17-2009, 03:58 PM
I think its a good thing to tell people about whats going on with you because chances are tons of other people in this forum have done the exact same thing you feel bad or good about! Everything is motivation for you to keep moving forward and this is an awesome place to express yourself and get encouragement.

02-17-2009, 04:24 PM
I'd think you'd be proud of yourself that you'd want to share and help others, what's the point of not? To be competitive and have a better body then others? I think growth is about giving, otherwise one would remain stuck in selfishness... in the long run you'll grow more in other ways if you share and are a role models for others. Our society is a mess, anyone that learns this stuff - I feel - is obligated to share with others who are stuck. Also if you are successful in one area of life, you'll be successful in other areas too. You've proven you can do this - but the law of recopricity is such that you must share, thus other things will come back to you. Just how it works, kinda like karma.

02-17-2009, 05:09 PM
No, never. I work with all overweight women (literally, all of them) and I keep my mouth shut as they discuss weight loss (it is a constant topic). They tend to eat tiny portions of things and then binge on late night pizza, etc (we are dispatchers and sit 12 hour overnight shifts). They often make comments about how skinny I am and how lucky I am to not have a weight problem. This has gone on for years.

I used to be overweight, of course. I wouldn't be here if I didn't. I used to have rolls, I used to eat Wendys 3-5x a day, I used to think ramen noodles were a balanced lunch, I used to weigh 40-50lbs+ more than now.

If they actually ask me "why do you eat that" or "what exercise do you do", of course, I will answer. But I never "volunteer" anything. Even when they ask me questions, they often don't like my answer. They aren't ready for the lifestyle change. One lady was, and she lost 100lbs on her own. Until they are ready, I'm sure I probably just remind them of what they want to be, even though they are unaware that I was once like them.

02-17-2009, 06:08 PM
I let it out to people who will understand. 99% of those people are in this forum. ;D

02-17-2009, 06:11 PM
Keep it in or let it out...depends on the time and the place. I've lost weight before, and then found the pain of regaining worse when it was accompanied by the embarrassment of having told everyone about my losses.

Now, I have a very few folks that I occasionally discuss my weight behavior with. (Mostly my husband...and my therapist, but also a very trusted friend who has a similar problem.)

I find that 3FC is incredibly helpful. Acknowledging where I am going wrong (or right) helps, and here I can do it with some anonymity...and know I will get some support (even if that comes in the form of a "get your *** in gear)

02-17-2009, 06:21 PM
I tell people from time to time. I don't make a big deal about it, (I think I am afraid of regaining) but do want them to know that I am eating carefully, and that I don't want to be pushed to "just try my apple tarts" etc.
One co-worker has just returned after a 6 month leave, I find she is very judgemental and nasty with it, so I will not discuss it with her around.

02-17-2009, 08:51 PM
Thank you so much everyone for your encouraging comments and replies. I really appreciate it.

Horsey- Your comment really touched me. Thanks a lot

02-17-2009, 10:08 PM
I've definitely struggled with deciding when to hold it in and when to let it out. On the one hand, it's good to talk about what I'm doing because it's such a big part of my life right now. Getting healthy is my first priority, and it feels strange to deliberately censor myself. But at the same time, there are also good reasons for keeping my mouth shut. I certainly don't want to make anyone uncomfortable or sound like I'm bragging or giving unsolicited advice. And I've also come to realize that when you talk about your weight loss, it's how some people choose to define you. In a lot of people's minds I'm the chick that lost a lot of weight, and I've found that it's all they want to talk to me about anymore. So for now, I'm holding it in unless someone specifically asks me something. Maybe that will change when I reach goal and simply have to let it out... who knows?

02-18-2009, 12:48 AM
I talk about it here, to my hubby, my closest friends... but some people in my life are still struggling very hard with their weight and I do my best not to rub my success's in their face. I also try not to give advice or even talk about what is going on with me because I know that it bothers them :(

Thighs Be Gone
02-18-2009, 12:54 AM
I discuss it rarely. I have two friends that I discuss it with periodically but they are very much into the lifestyle like me. I have one obese friend that asks me several questions and I always answer her thoroughly and we are always alone when she asks. I have even offered to sit down with her and go through my journal and show her everything. She hasn't taken me up on it though--she just isn't ready yet. The last thing I want to do is shove anything in anyone's face. I had a "friend-emy" that used to do this to me when she was thin and I hated her for it--unfortunately she is at her highest weight ever now. She now makes comments about whats on my plate when I sit to eat and tells me, "you don't need to lose anymore weight!" Yeah, like I believe her!

02-18-2009, 12:13 PM
I haven't discussed it with any of my friends. Most of my friends now know me only after I lost the first chunk of weight so they don't know that I've lost any! I talk to my bf a lot about it, which I should probably ease up on because I think it's making him crazy :dizzy:

02-18-2009, 02:04 PM
I love to blog or talk about it on forums like this one. But not so much with the people in my life. My husband doesn't really get it. If I mess up I really don't want to talk about it to people :( I try to talk to my mom and sister sometimes but it is tough. They are always trying to diet but not really lol and I feel like one I am giving them motivation and sharing ideas and tips but on the other it might make them feel sad about themselves if I have success or am doing good ya know?

02-18-2009, 02:39 PM
I don't go around volunteering the information but will discuss if people ask- I love when someone hasn't seen me in a while and says "have you lost weight?"

I have friends who ask me things over and over and I tell them each time- but I know they aren't ready to change- so I just say as little as possible. For instance one of my friends is definitely 150 lbs overweight and she's seen me losing weight and when she asked me what I eat and I showed her my sparkpeople menu's she shot down almost everything! "Oh I don't drink water, I don't like brown rice, I don't eat a lot of veggies" and so on. I was like well eating meatloaf and mashed potatoes and chinese food and all that other stuff you eat isn't going to help you lose weight!

People who want to know cuz they are looking for what works for them, and supportive people I readily share with- but people who just shut me down or don't seem to care I don't mention things to or say very little.