Weight Loss Support - They totally missed the point...

View Full Version : They totally missed the point...

02-14-2009, 12:07 PM
OK, I've been lurking here for awhile now (since I joined in 2005 and this is my first post) I guess you already knew that.

Anyway, I've been overweight my whole life but feel like I am finally getting my eating under control and making a lifestyle change instead of "dieting". I have worked at my current job for 9 years, and one of my co-workers I have known for 25 years, so she has seen my struggles for all this time, so I am still surprised that she just doesn't get it.

I had a HUGE non-scale victory last weekend. I count calories and I had such a craving for brownies. I went into the kitchen and all I had was a 9x13 mix, so I made that. While they baked, I made some really yummy homemade frosting. As soon as they came out of the oven, I cut a 2" wedge all the way across the edge and put it on the plate. Then I put a big glob of the frosting on it. I ate most of it, and after I was done, I thought "You know, that really wasn't all that great, so I went into the kitchen and threw the rest of the brownies away, as well as the frosting. Then I did up the trash bag and put it out for the trash man. I was so thrilled with myself, this was just a huge victory for me to be able to get rid of them and not eat the entire pan through that night and the next day, because I had the next day off and I would have eaten them.

So the next time Im at work, I'm sharing my huge victory with them, and guess what they said?!?! You threw away PERFECTLY good food, and didn't bring it in for us? They were actually mad that I didn't bring it in to them! I told them that I didn't even think of that, I just wanted it out of my house, and also that I had the next day off and I didn't want to eat them. One of them said "well, you could have put them out in your car" and I said "Would you tell an alcoholic to just keep their alcohol out in the car and then it wouodn't be a temptation to them?"

So I just wanted to share this story with people who understand this type of thing and not judge me for what I did...

Thanks for reading...Tammy

I just wanted to add that I counted the brownie calories in my day's total and still kept at my 2000 a day goal, which was what I planned all along.

02-14-2009, 12:14 PM
No, they don't get it. They don't understand that just because X food is available, you don't have to prepare it, you don't have to eat it, and you don't have to save it.

Food banks can sometimes use unopened boxes of mix and such--and that's another good thing to do with those items.


02-14-2009, 12:16 PM
I understand, perfectly , I threw away most of a freshly baked peach pie ., I knew it had to be out of my house. It has taken me years to get over the "don't be wasteful " syndrome. Better it be in my garbage can than on my hips.

02-14-2009, 12:16 PM
Good for you Fungramma! That is a HUGE accomplishment and I'm so glad you're proud of yourself!! You did something wonderful for yourself and from how I see it, I think it's the best thing you could have done then. You took care of yourself, and that is what this is all about :)

It's unfortunate that your colleagues weren't able to see it from that angle when you told them. I'm sure that was disappointing and not the reaction you were looking for. I think sometimes people don't realize how much of an addiction food is for some people. But I loved your alcoholic analogy, I think it hits the spot perfectly.

Hang in there and keep your chin up! It's individual victories like that, that overtime, build towards what you're striving for :D


02-14-2009, 12:19 PM
*hugs* I am sorry :( In general people are just dumb lol.

that is why I love these forums and to talk to people who actually get it lol though I am quite a lurker myself lol :)

Good job you should be proud of yourself!!

02-14-2009, 12:23 PM
Tammy - ignore them. They don't have a clue what a huge victory that was!
We do!
Decisions like that will add up to excellent results!

02-14-2009, 12:24 PM
Wow, you guys are awesome!! Thanks so much for all the encouragement. it's so nice to talk to people that understand!

02-14-2009, 12:27 PM
Yeah, people don't get it. That was a great victory! Congrats!

Yesterday one of my coworkers offered to buy me a soda. I declined, he pressed, I declined, he pressed. He was just being nice. I finally explained that I'd recently lost a lot of weight and I was keeping it off by planning what I eat and sticking to the plan. He finally stopped offering.

Those who haven't been there don't understand. You can always talk about your accomplishments here!! :hug: Stay delurked, okay?

02-14-2009, 12:27 PM
Jeez, sounds like they couldn't even try to understand someone's else's difficulty over their own wants for treats. You did great! It's harder, for me anyway, to stop after I've already started, than to never start in the first place.

02-14-2009, 12:47 PM
Good for you!

I, personally, am a bit of a masochist and *enjoy* making baked goods for other people and reveling in the fact that I don't eat any of it. It makes me feel like I'm beating my demons. But I'm weird like that...

(I do, however, lick the spoon and beaters!)

Keep up the good work!

02-14-2009, 12:59 PM
I think you did great! Other people will never understand-like my friend who runs a pizza restaurant and doesn't understand how I can come in an just eat salad while everyone else eats the pizza. But, you did what you needed to do-make what you want to take care of the craving, eat only what you want, record what you ate, and dispose of the rest-that's incredible! Keep coming back and keep up the good work!

02-14-2009, 10:48 PM
It's harder, for me anyway, to start after I've already started, than to never start in the first place.

I'm that way, too. I read somewhere, could have been here, or could have been on one of the many diet boards I visit, that it's easier to say no once in the grocery store than 1000 times after you get it home. 100 calorie packs just do not work for me, if I know the box is there I have to either eat them until they're gone, or i drive myself crazy thinking about them and wanting them, so it's just so much easier to not even bring it in the house. Funny thing is, if I don't have anything like that in the house, I never even think about wanting it.

02-14-2009, 10:54 PM
in my opinion, it isn't possible to "waste" junk food. yes there are other people who could eat it, but it's not something nutritional that anyone honestly should be eating.

throwing away a box of cookies is different than throwing away a bag of vegetables, in my opinion.

02-14-2009, 11:07 PM
:lol: It is too funny to me that your coworkers feel like you are under some kind of obligation to bring them the food you don't want to eat yourself. I think it is hilarious that they were actually mad about this. Honestly, who thinks this way??

I don't mean to come off unsympathetic. Kudos to you for 1) recognizing that the brownies weren't good enough to be worth the calories and 2) actually throwing them out once you realized this. I'd have struggled with both those things. And I'm sorry your co-workers were so focused on themselves that they couldn't recognize this for the achievement that it is.

02-15-2009, 01:57 AM
Good for you. I think being able to get rid of the rest of the brownies is a huge victory and unless people have been thru the same thing they will never get it. So you enjoy your success:carrot:.

02-15-2009, 02:49 AM
I totally will judge you...I judge you a winner! You saw your problem and solved it. Fantastic! You stopped the behavior in its tracks. WOW!

How often do we talk ourselves into really hurting ourselves...we are not garbage cans who have to take in whatever is out there.

You did great!

02-15-2009, 03:04 AM
I got a bag full of home made cookies from a friend this past Christmas. I ate a few, and then a few more, and then I realized that as long as they were there I was going to eat them. So I threw them away. And it felt good! So I know exactly how you feel. Congratulations on your victory!!

02-15-2009, 09:00 AM
Yup they just don't get it... but don't hold it against them! You have to remember that homemade brownies are a HUGE treat for many people.

It is just a natural reaction for people to say "WHAT you didn't bring it in here?" LOL! I would have said the same 3 months ago!

But I can TOTALLY relate about throwing food away because this past New Years Eve I went to a family gathering and they had a huge amount of fried chicken after the party and I had a SIL who absolutely would not take NO for an answer and made everyone go home with fried chicken (and pie).

I went home and threw it in the fridge. The next day I opened the fridge and my mouth watered at the thought of some cold fried chicken! LOL!

And I opened the foil and was looking at the 5 pieces of chicken and thought to myself "YOU DON'T NEED TO EAT THAT!"

So quickly I balled up the chicken and when outside and threw it in the trash cans outside. I knew if I had thrown it in a kitchen can (it was clean) I might have been tempted to fish it out (it was wrapped up in tin foil)

Did I waste that chicken? Yes I did, but I knew if I didn't get it out of my sight I would have eaten every piece and I knew I had to throw it away in a way that it could not be retrieved!

And the 2 pieces of pecan pie I got sent home with?

Well I ate them but I stayed withing my 1800 calorie intake and it was MMMM!

02-15-2009, 10:29 AM
I was visiting a friend who insisted I take home some fried chicken, she wouldn't take no for an answer. On the way home I saw a homeless man with a sign"need food" , I gave him the chicken, he was happy and my friend didn't know the differance and I saved myself unpteen calories.

02-15-2009, 10:32 AM
I can totally relate to this...I have been having a tough time with my coworkers as well. We work in a very small office, and I am very close with two of my coworkers. One of them is also trying to lose some weight so she is usually a great support, but the other one doesn't have much of a weight problem to struggle with, so she doesn't get it. Sometimes when I say I am having a really tough time (usually because someone else brought cookies or pastries into the office conference room), she just says "Well you've worked out this week, so you should go have some!" And I'm like, "AAAAAAAARRRGGHH!" Just because I work out doesn't mean I should undo everything I'm working toward! She just doesn't get it...I know she's just trying to be nice, but sometimes she acts as a little devil on my shoulder. When I binge at work, I don't blame her, but it does make it a WHOLE lot harder to stick to plan when A) people keep bringing junk food into the office, and B) most of your coworkers actively encourage you to eat it.

Blah! I am trying to combat this issue by bringing my own healthy treats every day, so if I am confronted with cupcakes or cookies at the office, I can fight it by having one of my own more healthy indulgences. One of my good standbys is to keep a 3-square section of a Hershey Special Dark bar in a ziplock baggie in my desk drawer, "for emergencies". :) A 3-square pieces of Special Dark is only 1 WW pt!

Plus, another thing that makes the office a minefield is.....we're all women, and we all seem to end up TOM at the same time!!! So then we're all ravenous for chocolate and cookies and it doesn't take much for us to all cram into one of our vehicles and head to Tim Horton's for big cookies. Frustrating.

02-15-2009, 10:34 AM
If they want brownies so bad they can make a box themselves.

Thighs Be Gone
02-15-2009, 10:41 AM
fungramma, I am impressed that putting something in the trash will deter you. LOL--I won't go into details but I have to RUIN things to not eat them...a tied trash bag does nothing for me...LOL...

I cannot believe I just admitted that.

Great job getting them out of the house!

02-15-2009, 10:56 AM
That's really greeat- you should be so proud of yourself! wasteful or not, you did the right thing by throwing them out if you were going to be tempted. Way to go! I'm proud of you!! :hug:

02-15-2009, 11:28 AM
I suggest bringing the remnants of your half-eaten sandwich in after lunch and leaving it in the breakroom for all to share (with the bite marks cut off, of course). Or the last few mini-cookies in the 100-cal pack that you weren't hungry for anymore. After all, you shouldn't waste PERFECTLY good food.

02-15-2009, 01:22 PM
fungramma, I am impressed that putting something in the trash will deter you. LOL--I won't go into details but I have to RUIN things to not eat them...a tied trash bag does nothing for me...LOL...

I cannot believe I just admitted that.

Great job getting them out of the house!

That's actually why I put the trash bag out for the trash man, because the bag was clean cause I had already taken the trash out that day. So I didn't trust myself to just put them in the trash, Ihad to really get rid of them. I bought some of those new chocolate mini wheats, and they were such a trigger for me, I couldn't stop eating them so I filled the rest of the bag that was left with water and put them into the trash, that way I couldnt get to them again, so I know what you mean about having to ruin things, not just throwing them away.

There, now we've both admitted it...lol...

Quote from tkm256: "I suggest bringing the remnants of your half-eaten sandwich in after lunch and leaving it in the breakroom for all to share (with the bite marks cut off, of course). Or the last few mini-cookies in the 100-cal pack that you weren't hungry for anymore. After all, you shouldn't waste PERFECTLY good food."

Oh, my word, I almost fell out of my chair laughing at that idea. I just may try it with my apple core from tomorrow's lunch....lol..