30-Somethings - Feeling Disheartened

View Full Version : Feeling Disheartened

01-21-2009, 11:48 AM
I'm not 'new' here, I signed up years ago but I never really participated. I'm back with the commitment to be more involved this time. Maybe it will help.

This morning was my weigh in day and I lost one measly pound. Ordinarily, I'd be happy with that for a week. However, I've been on a big push. My motivation is up and I had a goal to get the '2' off the scale by the end of January. This morning's weigh in I was 204.6. And I'm frustrated. Obviously, I will miss yet another goal. I can't even achieve a reasonable goal. 6 pounds in a month is not that big of a goal and I can't even hit that.

I am creeping along so incredibly slow! I started working on my weight back in September and I've only lost 16 pounds. That's it. I worked out for 232 HARD minutes this week and it only helped me lose one stupid pound. I have PCOS (Polycystic Ovarian Syndrome) AND ADD (which means I lose interest easily and I'm impulsive). I also have plantar fasciitis in my feet I can't get rid of unless I lose weight so I really paid for those work outs in pain all week. All that effort amounted to only one pound. How in the world will I ever get there?

01-21-2009, 11:55 AM
I have PCOS as well. It matters if you have high testosterone (meaning you'll have extra body hair) or you are like me and have insulin resistance meaning you carry most of your weight in your abdomen, may have hyperpigmentation around nect, axilla etc..

I have never been successful on a diet. On Monday, I decided to start Atkins. With the very little carbs (20g) you eat, I'm hoping it won't spike the insulin and my ovaries will SHUT THE F*** UP! :tantrum: and let me lose some weight!

I'm being motivated by a cruise that I'm going on in May and am super worried this wont work, just like the rest. I've also joined Curves. I can't make it around the circuit twice yet, but I'm sure I'll get there...hopefully.

You having PCOS (either kind) and losing one pound is a great victory, even though it doesn't feel like it. And it's sure a lot better than gaining a pound, right? Hang in there girl!

01-21-2009, 12:41 PM
I have the insulin resistant type of PCOS but it is a mild case- I was able to get pg though we still had to do IF treatments because of male factor issues. It's the sugar thing for me.

I tried Atkins a few years ago but on the 4th day I passed out because of super low blood sugar and quickly decided I'd better not do that diet. Your experience may be completely different.

I think the ADD is actually a bigger nemisis to me right now than the PCOS. It's that impulsive eating. I don't eat a lot of naughty but just enough to screw up my progress. It doesn't take much of a cheat to really hinder me.

I AM going to pick up and keep going. I'm headed over to my sister's to use her high-end elliptical trainer this morning. Gotta keep going even if it feels pointless sometimes. I think my body is just really comfortable at the present weight and is resisting going down the next 10 pounds but I'll get that 10 pounds off eventually. Maybe even by next year!

01-21-2009, 03:18 PM
bindersbee, GOOD FOR YOU! :yay: Come here for encouragement....everyone here is GREAT! You can always find something to take with you when you visit here. Just try to train yourself with every bite to ask, "Is it really worth it to eat this?" And buy NO JUNK FOOD! You're less likely to be tempted if you don't possess any temptations. Going out to eat is a really biggie for me. I ALWAYS overdo it when we go out....plus it's expensive. There's absolutely NOTHING good that comes from going out to eat except I get to be lazy...and even that's not REALLY a good thing, although it feels good at the time! :lol: Soooooo, we're doing a LOT of eating at home! If I have supper started in the evening before hubby gets home, I've found that we're a lot less likely to go out to eat! I'm just trying to make it a habit to have supper started when he gets here....

I guess I've rambled...sorry. Bindersbee, you're a lot closer to "onederland" than I am....hang in there...you're soooo close.....even if it takes you two months to lose those dreaded 4 lbs to get that 2 off the scales, won't it feel AWESOME when you do??? We're slave to whatever masters us.....it's food....you have power over it! (Somebody remind me of that when I'm feelin' weak or disheartened!!! PLEASE!!)

01-21-2009, 11:01 PM
Bindersbee, welcome back. I'm not very familiar with PCOS, so I don't know it's affect on weight loss. I will give you the best advise I can for general weight loss. Make sure you eat for one. So many people try to eat a carrot and call that fuel for the day. Try to eat every 3 hours or so. Keep stoking the fire. Drink plenty of water. It will help feed your metabolism. If you're not counting calories, or you're not a good judge of portion size, invest in an account on fitday, it's free. Get a scale and measure. I know a lot of times If I don't measure and count, I tend to overeat. I'll nickle and dime myself. 6 pounds though is still 6 pounds. Be happy with it. Sure it's not what you hoped for, but it's steps in the right direction. Keep us posted. I can only speak for myself, but I'd love to know how you're doing. :)


01-21-2009, 11:45 PM
I know what you mean, I've been having similar problems. It will get better eventually. Maybe reevaluate your diet plan?

01-22-2009, 06:45 PM
Hey bindersbee,
i wasn't going to spend alot of time posting today (Gosh knows i can stay on here an hour reading and writing post before i realize what's hit me)
but i can't ignore a cry for help!!!!

First of all, DON'T BE DISCOURAGED with 16lbs. that's still progress in the right direction. I bet 16 lbs is enough that you notice a difference in how your clothes fit? So you didn't loose 6lbs this month, you did your best and you kicked that one measly pounds butt!!

A good thing to do now is reevaluate your routine. you're doing alot of cardio and still only dropped a lb in a week (which is normal btw, but you know that)
Maybe add some weight training? adding muscle improves metabolism. Maybe cut back on cardio, 10mins here, 10mins there and add in some light weight reps.

Have you heard about the PCOS diet? a friend of mine was on that and last i heard it was working for her. this might be the one she used: http://www.amazon.com/PCOS-Diet-Book-Nutritional-Polycystic/dp/0007131844

keep going! you have to get below 200!
I understand, though, my weight loss isn't going quite so fast here and it is discouraging, but at least i'm sticking with it and it's not going up i guess.

01-26-2009, 12:45 AM
Well, I must admit that the two days AFTER I started this whining post I got on the scale and more than another pound had disappeared. I lost 2.5 in 1.5 weeks so I guess I just needed to be more patient. I got 203.0 on the scale this morning.

I'll still fall just shy of my goal but that doesn't really matter. I know artificial time constraints are one of the major reasons people quit. Major reasons I'VE quit in the past. A goal is simply a motivational tool- it's not the whole story nor should it be. I know this but my programming tells me unless it's a big number or major effort it isn't enough.

Having to mentally reprogram myself is one of the hardest parts of this whole thing, you know? Learning to accept a 'good enough' effort instead of expecting perfection I'm incapable of achieving then giving up once it becomes obvious I can't do it. Maybe we set ourselves up for that on purpose- so we'll be able to go back to the comfort and familiarity of food.

Whatever the case, I'm sure I'll have more ups and downs along the way like everyone else. Thanks to all of you for helping me in a challenging moment.

01-26-2009, 12:49 AM
Perfection has killed many weight loss efforts. Kicking perfectionism to the curb was one of the big changes with my most recent effort (maintaining 50 lbs lost since 8/08).

I know it can be frustrating to work so hard and not see the change on the scale you hoped for. But remember, this is for the rest of your life. So, no rush really. I agree that you should get rid of the timelines. Find success in behavior changes, not digits on a scale.

01-26-2009, 01:11 AM
Another suggestion - don't always rely on the scale to judge your progress. Grab a tape measure and measure yourself - waist, hips, arms, thighs. You may not see a huge weight loss on the scales, but you may see inches coming off your measurements.

02-02-2009, 02:27 AM
I just wanted to add that I had a little victory this week. I had to go to a conference so I put on my logo button down shirt that I only wear to trade shows for the conference. I haven't worn that shirt since the summer and it is a size 2x. When I put it on I was shocked! It was BAGGY on me! The almost-too-tight arm bands were gaping. The almost clingy fabric totally fell away from me. I was stoked!

So, later I went to the mall and bought a couple clearance shirts in a regular size XL from the regular department- NOT the fat chicks section! I even got on a pair of size 16 pants- from the REGULAR dept. They totally don't fit yet but I got them on and zipped- even if I was stretching the stretch in those jeans. The point is, in another 5-10 lbs. I will be back in the regular section at clothes stores instead of the Women's section. That's huge for me. I HAVE to get there!

02-02-2009, 01:04 PM
bindersbee, CONGRATS on the progress!! :cheer2: I can totally relate on the ADD issue. :lol: Do you take meds? I was, but have recently stopped, mostly because I didn't like the doc I was going to. But I will say that I dropped like 7 pounds on 2-3 wks. - something like that, when I first started them! :D It was a nice honeymoon period. It is hard to stay focused, interested and motivated to do something that just isn't interesting! Do you follow any specific plan right now? i just joined WW and I find that it keeps me interested to figure out how many points I can have or have left.

02-03-2009, 04:39 AM

I am not medicated. I considered Stratera but our insurance is so crappy now (high deductable health plan) that we just can't afford to have me on it. I function okay but would probably do better if medicated. I've resisted the meds because I'm afraid I'd 'lose my spark'. Maybe that isn't a 'real' concern?

I am considering meds again though. I don't know. I'm in a bit of a Mid-Mom Crisis right now and trying to figure out which way is up. A Mid-Mom Crisis is a little term I coined which basically means the point at which your kids are all in school (baby is now in Kindy) and it's time to re-evaluate your life and figure out new goals. I've always been a goal-oriented achiever type but these years as a SAHM have sort of dulled that. I'm finally at a time when I can start thinking about me again and I'm not at all sure what to do with myself- lots of options but also a lot of fear about really putting myself out there after nearly a decade of being mostly at home.

02-04-2009, 02:40 AM
Rian...I think your tape measure is a great idea. I tend to obsess on the scale, even tho my clothes fit differently. I should start measuring once a week too!!

02-04-2009, 09:04 AM
Bindersbee, that is TOTALLY AWESOME (at the risk of sounding very 80's-ish)...out of plus sizes!!!! Wow, I soooooo cannot wait to get there!!

When I had my hysterectomy in summer 07, I went clothes shopping two weeks later (I lost about 10 lbs in the process) and when I went to the plus size side of the store, the lady that worked there asked me if I was sure I was on the right side of the store.....talk about stoked!!! (Of course, I WAS on the right side, but that she had to ask....WOW!) I've got about 10 more lbs to go before I'm back at that weight.....I can't wait!! I have some 16's that I'm dying to get into....I tried them on Sunday and I'm close....but not there yet. AWESOME feeling, I know! Congratulations!! Enjoy it!!

02-04-2009, 09:37 AM

I have been where you are. I still have problems with ovarian cysts on my remaining ovary. When I was 29, the doctors removed everything but my right ovary. I know that it seams to bit young, never mind drastic but for me it was more a decision to save my own life. I know that it is frustrating to go through what you are experiencing.

As far as loosing weight, I have been fighting this battle for years. I am finding a lot of encouragement here. You could try to follow a reduced carb diet at a more gradual reduction. My doctor has me on a diet that she recommend because of my cystic problems.

When I first started a reduced carb diet, she had my reduce my carb intake to 150 a day for two weeks. Then she reduced it down to 100 carbs for two weeks and we progressed to a level that suited me. Then she designed a program that was 35-55-75 at a two week rotation.

This would allow my body to loose weight gradually and still be able to have the occasional treat (no-sugar) ice cream and no-sugar add piece of pie from time to time. She felt that 20 carbs a day is way to low. If you are used to having a ton of sugar and other nastiest in diet. Then you need to break away from it slowly.

She definitely had me taking a good multivitamin and insisted that I kept in check with her, so she could reevaluate my dietary progress as needed. I am really happy that you such a good day. You deserve a big hug..

02-04-2009, 10:08 AM
Ladybird, congrats on crossing the realm into onederland!! :)

02-04-2009, 11:32 AM
Oh Ladybird! You've entered the elusive Onderland. Congrats on that. I'm itching to get there too.

I tried a very low carb diet once (Atkins) and my sugars got so low that I passed out on day 4. I'm not a huge meat eater so it was really hard for me to go that low.

Presently I follow (in theory) a balanced plan of 40/30/30 % carbs, fats, protein. When I follow it well, I lose well.

I think it's awesome that you've found a doctor willing to really fire some neurons on your behalf. It sounds like he/she is really interested in helping you solve your problem and it's great that you have a dedicated professional in your corner.

02-04-2009, 07:45 PM
Okay, if not to sound like a square peg in a round hole, but does Onederland mean? I have heard it used in many places here on the site. Bindersbee you will loose the weight, you just have to find the right diet combination for you. It sounds like you are heading in the right direction.

My biggest hurdle is my own laziness at times. I always seem to put off doing my exercises, but I know it takes both proper diet and exercise to really loose weight. Michelle is always telling me that my diet won't work, unless I get my butt on the treadmill! Gotta love the doc, she awesome!

She told me there is nothing wrong with your legs, so get moving. I am going to therapy for my shoulder and it slow moving process but it will get there eventually. I really don't have any excuse not to hit the treadmill, since we have them where I work. Again just me procrastinating...

02-05-2009, 09:25 PM
'Onederland' just means that your weight has a '1' as the first number instead of something higher. I am so sick of seeing a '2' as my first number. I've been over 200 lbs. since my twins were born (except for a few brief weeks before I got pg with the last baby) and the twins are almost 9 now! Yikes!

I did see a weight in the 201's this morning so if I really work hard and eat well, I might see Onderland by next week!

I agree that it's our own shortcomings that often hold us back. When I do what I know how to do, it works well. It's the darn doing that's hard.