My mom has been over weight for as long as I can remember, and she's tried every fad diet that has ever came up... So by now she is plane and tired of trying anything else... She sees my success with just watching my calories, and I told her to do the same, but that only lasted about 3 days, and she was complaining that she couldn't eat anything etc... Even with me explaining that more 'junk' you eat, those have higher calories, but if you eat 'good' foods then you'll find that you can actually eat a lot more... But she just rolls her eyes and is convinced that LAPBAN is the only answer.
She is going to schedule her LAPBAN surgery after the first of the year, but I feel like she isn't up for the challenge.
I try to explain how I feel about this to her, but its like talking to a wall.
She still thinks that with the LAPBAN it will answer all her prayers and she wont really have to do any work.. But isn't it based off of calories??
I understand that it helps you feel full, and for some people this can be the only alternative, but I think my mom is just being lazy by not even giving the slightest chance with just watching her calories..
I am also worried about any complications during or after she gets the LAPBAN. She's a beer drinker, and even though the doctors told her that she cant have beer again, she just rolls her eyes at them and has a 'I can do what I want' type attitude...
Anyone who has had LAPBAN surgery, or knows anything about it, please help me understand this a little better, and maybe how to get my mom to understand things a little better...?
I feel like she is just thinking that this is going to solve all of her problems without having to do any work, isn't that wrong? Even with LAPBAN, don't you still have to exercise and watch what you eat??
12-18-2008, 06:18 PM
Any weight loss surgery is NOT the end all and be all. It's a tool. It's NOT the easy way out of being fat and unhealthy...it's VERY hard work. Your mother is at a place where we all were when we heard that surgery could help. The next stage is realizing that it's not a magic pill or magic surgery. Then she will have to decide to do give it her all, try anything to be healthy again...including watching what she eats and exercising then the surgery will be a success. There are some that had surgery and just returned to eating and sitting around who never lose a lbs.
I was obsessed with having gastirc bypass, thinking it would be the only way I could eat what I wanted and still lose weight. I found through years of research and now 11 months post op...that surgery makes your stomach smaller, it makes it harder to absorb my food...it DID NOT change my brain or the reasons I overate or was overweight in the first place. I suggest to anyone wanting WLS, get into counseling and figure out the why you're over weight first! By the time I got my insurance to pay for surgery, I was sooo ready to do all I could do to make my experience a good one.
Good luck to you and your mother, support each other the best you can. :hug:
12-19-2008, 11:06 AM
sounds like you have your hands full, mudskipper. angela's right - this is only a tool. and that beer thing - well, a few sips of something with bubbles and the pain starts, and it's not like anything you've ever experienced.
if you think she's really interested in exploring it, send her here to do some research!
from the sounds of things, it looks like she's been approved for surgery? am i getting the right impression here? if so, she's going to be in for a rude awakening unless she does some real soul-searching first.
12-19-2008, 01:16 PM
Hands full is right, but your mom sounds like she's gonna do it no matter what.
Lapband is not a cure, I'm living proof. Its so much easier to eat junk food with the band then healthy clean food because junk slides down and breaks down so much easier. Having the band means dieting, counting calories, eating healthy and exercising. The only thing it does do is help you feel fuller faster. But !!! it doesn't stop you from eating at 12:00, 1:00, 2:00 etc, etc. You can eat all day long on it to satisfy the head hunger.
There are so many people who have great success with it and then there are not. Your so right sweetie, if your head is not into it, it won't work.
As far as the beer goes... carbonation can hurt (it does me) but for some bandsters it does not.
Maybe you can talk to her surgeon, or go with her to talk to the surgeon about her thinking its okay to drink beer, etc.
Good luck !!
12-19-2008, 09:56 PM
Hi, one of my customers had the lapban procedure around 6 weeks ago. He had planned to be back at the restaurant the next day - he was out for 3 days for he was not prepared for the way his body reacted after surgery. He started out with breakfast being 4 oz of V8, and 1-scrambled egg, decaf coffee. (I only know his breakfast routine)...anyway, after 2 weeks he joined the YMCA and worked out in the wellness center ... soon, he was having his breakfast with rye toast and by 6 weeks had lost 48 lbs and could walk up a flight of stairs without getting out of breath. This week - he found he gained 4 lbs back so he cut out the toast. It's as with anything else - you'll get out what you put in...I wish her the best...
And yes, she has already been approved for the surgery and I have been with her to 2 LAPBAN seminars. She is scheduled for her first 'real' conciliation on January 7th.
I keep explaining how I feel about this, and how she should really just try watching what she eats more, and see what happens, but still she is determined...
It also didn't help when we just recently had a family Christmas party and another family member who had had the lapban was eating a huge plate full of food and drinking endless pina colodas.... (whats the deal?? I thought you can't even eat that much??)
either way, I appreciate all your responces...
12-26-2008, 08:15 AM
family member who had had the lapban was eating a huge plate full of food and drinking endless pina colodas.... (whats the deal?? I thought you can't even eat that much??)
Yes, you can eat alot of food, especially junk. If you have little restriction (fills) its like you don't even have the band, so if that person was shoveling it in, then mostlikely they don't have the proper restriction (like me). Drinks, Ice cream, stuff like that go down regardless of your restriction.
Good luck hon !!!
12-31-2008, 12:36 PM
I have been banded for a little over 6 months now. I just got my 3rd fill Monday, but before that I could eat a small plate of food with no bad reaction. I also have NEVER drank with my meals, or drank any carbonated beverages. My band date was May 26th and it has been since then that I have drank anything except water, tea, or coffee. (and i have really cut down on the coffee) I am down 67 pounds since surgery and am glad I was banded. I do fear for those not committed to the eating plan, as if you don't follow the rules of the band you can and probably will have complications. I pray that your mom is ready for the responsibility of following the guidelines. She will have great results if she does. Being banded is not easy, you have to concentrate on eating. It is hard to go out with friends and family to eat. If something doesn't go down right, you may end up in the bathroom throwing up. You have to take your time, eat very small bites, and chew, chew, chew. You have to eat protien first, then veggies. I do still eat a desert but it is generally a 100 calorie sugar free ice cream sandwich. I love them but have limited them to 1 per day. You also need to NOT snack. I make myself think about WHY I am eating, is it out of boredom or am I really hungry. This is a life saving procedure if you use it correctly. I know you think your mom should try to just loose the weight, but think about how long she has been overweight and how many times she has tried to lose the weight. I tried lots of times and was successful. I lost 100 pounds 3 times in my life just to gain it all back over time. It gets to where you just feel like giving up. I really want this to work long term. I also know I now have the tool to help with that. I will get the last 40 some pounds off and they will stay off because my tool will be there for me. This procedure is not for everyone, it's no easy fix. Good luck and God Bless!