The past few weeks I have lied to myself on a continual basis. First, I told myself that I was trying to lose weight. I didn't exercise, I barely ate healthy and I never tracked my calorie intake.
Then, I told myself that I was "happy the way I am" because that would mean I didn't need to change. I told myself that maybe this was the best I could be even though, at the back of my mind, I remember being 193 at this time last year which is a full 18 or so pounds from where I am now.
I lied to myself when I said I was ready to change, that I was going to work harder. The truth is I hoped merely by posting I could start to change my habits, but I took no action.
So, here I am, confessing to you my friends, and wondering when I'll ever change my horrible habits. How can I stop lying to myself and battle my worst enemy, myself?
Dig deep, forgive yourself, LOVE yourself, and realize that YOU are worth all the time, sacrifice and effort that will be needed to do this.
Take it one day at a time - you really, really CAN DO THIS!
I have totally been in your shoes (see my goal story) and - even worse - I am far shorter than you are (and probably older too).
You have to WANT to do this - deep down - you have to be ready. It will require a change in your behavior. It will require some sacrifices. But - I can speak from experience - it is SOOOOO worth it!
You are NOT happy where you are (or you wouldn't have posted). You CAN start NOW - not tomorrow - not next week, not in January - NOW - this very minute.
You deserve it! I will keep you in my prayers this week!
Thinner, I can only repeat what others have suggested to me: if you can't do it all at once, do one thing at a time. Decide which bit to start with, this week, walk 20 minutes every day, then next week add in getting rid of junk food, after than stop binges, then calorie counts. etc.
Just like the mini-goals are easier to achieve than thinking about the big picture of how much we need to lose, concentrating on one thing at a time may help. I am starting with a food diary, and being brutally honest in it!
fatmad
You can do this. It doesn't have to be awful or terrible or feel like you are suffering. Yes, there will be days that you'll feel hungry, but once you clear a lot of those refined sugars out of your system and you eat lots and lots of protein, most days you probably won't have to feel all that hungry. Start tracking your calories and getting even some exercise -- just walking to start if that is what you can do for now -- and the weight WILL come off, and you will feel wonderful that you are doing such a good thing for yourself.
Hey hon, You already have the desire to change, or you wouldn't be posting here. That's in your favor! The truth is, you're not happy the way you are...
So now you need the willingness to take a step. You don't have to change everything at once, as the previous posters already said.
Choose one thing to get you started. It might be: Keeping a food journal for a week--not to change anything, but just to see what you're eating. Or give up using sugar in your tea or coffee, if you overdo that. Or go for a 20 minute walk each day. It all depends on what you see as one thing you could change.
Let us know what it is, and check back in! You're not alone...
My lie to myself is 'you've done it before, you can do it again'. And while that is true ... it's not nearly as easy as it sounds.
BUT ... you never forget the things you've learned each time you try. Even if all you did last Thursday was read here ... something went into your head and some of it will stick. Even if you once planned a day's menu the night before ... you know you did, it's in your head and some of it stuck.
How about an analogy? Each time be even think about getting slimmer and healthier it's like a brick with which we're building a platform. You then stand firmly on that platform to do it.
That sounds a bit silly and sometimes I break the bricks but ... ya know?
As everyone else keeps saying, take small steps and change one thing at a time. Losing weight and committing to a healthier lifestyle is one of the hardest things I have ever done. You have to make the committment for yourself, no one else can do it for you. You have to believe you are worth it. I know from experience it's easier to hide behind the extra weight than it is to accept responsibility for ourselves. Tell yourself you are worth the effort! Hang in there! You can do it!
Thank you for all of your responses and private messages. I do need to take smaller steps! Usually I try to go gung ho and start everything in the first day, eating less, exercising like crazy, journaling and counting calories, quitting soda and candy. I just overwhelm myself and then fail.
I think, the only thing I'm going to focus on this week is to walk daily. Right now it seems to be the best place to start. I'm going to go check out our town's new side walks (yes, we just got our first ones) and see where they lead me!
I think you have a good start by recognizing the lies.
It seems like a subtle thing, and maybe it makes no difference to most people, but I would rather just say I'm choosing not to doing something until I actually do it, rather than always "planning" on it, for months and years on end. If I'm choosing not to do it, I have the power to change that. If I make excuses and pretend something else is stopping me, I've taken away that power. P
Plus, it's sooo easy to put something off when you're fooling yourself by thinking you plan to do it tomorrow (even though you know you won't). There's always another tomorrow. On the other hand, it's a lot harder to keep admitting, over and over, that you're choosing not to do something important. After a while, you get sick of your wasteful self and do it.
we all do it. it takes a lot to actually do this and to change the way you're living and eating. but you know, you've admitted that you've lied about it and that's a start. i guess it's like AA< you have to admit you do it before you can stop the behaviour
One day at a time thinner! You will get there if you do it one day & a time. Don't get too discouraged if you fall off the wagon, get right back on and keep going the next day. We all fall off & over eat sometimes, it's OK
The "I love myself just as I am" line resonated with me. Whenever I say that to myself, I know deep down that it is not TRUE acceptance of myself, it is merely resistance to change/work/effort.
It's important to love yourself. But if you're not happy with where you're at weight-wise, it's almost impossible to REALLY love yourself, as much as you may want to. That's my thoughts, anyway. It's what is true for me.
I fall into the same traps. I "try" to lose weight, then wonder why everything I'm doing "isn't working". Duh. It's because I'm not doing ENOUGH. I think we both know that. But accepting you have a problem is the first step. lol. We'll get there.