General chatter - Significant Others- alike or opposites?




jimaterry
11-04-2008, 10:31 PM
I watched the old movie 'Barefoot in the park ' today (which i love), and it got me thinking about the 'opposites attract' theory.

My husband is shy, quiet, and very laid back. It takes a lot to get him riled, and even when he is riled, you can hardly tell lol. I on the other hand am very outgoing, dont have a shy bone in my body, and when im riled, you definately know it lol.

We have a lot in common as well though. We both like mmorpgs, the same movies, the same hobbies, we are both affectionate, have the same sense of humor, etc.

Are you and your SO's alike? opposites? or a little of both like us?


rubbytummy
11-04-2008, 10:47 PM
wow, you could practically have been describing me and my boyfriend there! our personalities are totally different, but we share interests (okay, i'll admit it, mostly nerdy interests -- mmorpgs and dates at the computer science museum!). i like to think our personalities complement each other -- especially when i'm eing melodramatic and he can calm me down no matter what.

FreeSpirit
11-04-2008, 11:12 PM
My husband is also pretty laid back while I'm the more outgoing one. We both get along with pretty much anybody, and we're both really caring and affectionate. I have a shorter fuse than he does, though. haha.


luvja
11-04-2008, 11:14 PM
I don't have a S/O atm. But in the past, my guys are always shy, laid back, and quiet.
Where as I am a loud mouth, rowdy, and not shy at all. Haha. :lol:
Opposites DO attract to some level.

Shopaholic1204
11-05-2008, 12:18 AM
My dh & I are a little of both. LoL!!

lizziep
11-05-2008, 01:51 AM
i think we're like you guys- we have certain things in common - our sarcasm, most likes & dislikes, etc- we both are shy and not shy (shy around new people, outgoing w/ family & most friends) - but we can't seem to agree on anything to DO together. that's been our biggest problem. he loves mmorpgs for instance and really wants me to play too but I hate them. i love playing games, just not on my computer. sad to say its one of our biggest fights. lol.

Its Courtney
11-05-2008, 02:31 AM
I've always been a believer in opposites attract..that it makes us well-rounded (no pun intended! :) ), and opens our minds to try new things.

My ex-fiance and I were POLAR opposites though...he was a quiet, shy, submissive guy that grew up on an island climbing trees and I've always been outgoing and goofy and strong-minded and grew up in a big city, he loves the beach, I love snowy mountains, he listened to jazz, I'm more of a rocker, I prefer comedies, he preferred sci-fi....and to an extent, yeah I think it works...but it got to the point where we really couldn't relate with each other and knew the future wouldn't get any easier...

I'm with a new guy now that I absolutely adore and can't imagine having it any other way! We're incredibly alike, have mirror-image personalities and tastes, and we have so many qualities in common that most people could never find in another s.o! It's so exciting! :)


Ok, I'm done. :)

JoyfulVegGirl
11-05-2008, 06:44 AM
I think you need a bit of both. Enough opposition to keep it exciting and interesting, and enough in common to be able to relate. I've always tended to fall for guys who may look like my extreme opposite on the outside, but on the inside be more like me when it comes to the important things.

Honestly, I don't think I'd like it very much if my DB was like me. Too much of a good thing :D

ronni62
11-05-2008, 09:21 AM
My DH and I are total opposites! It didn't take me long to figure out that I was Coke and he was Pepsi and there is almost nothing we agree on! Sometimes it drives me crazy, but we've managed to stay married 18 years, so we must have more in common than we think at times:lol:

FrouFrou
11-05-2008, 09:37 AM
I have to say for me opposites do attract! I wouldn't want to be with a version of me or live with someone who has every interest/like etc as me.

Zen Pharmacy
11-05-2008, 10:02 AM
We like the same movies, books, and music. And that's it.

I'm a go, go, go person. I hate sitting around the house. I love the outside and camping and hiking and fishing and waterskiing and sailing. I'm loud. Really loud. And I talk a lot. And sing a lot. And play music a lot. I have people over all the time or I'm going out with people all the time.

He stays at home. He plays WoW. He never met an outside he liked. He's very antisocial. I mean, he has friends, but he's content with hanging out once a month or so.

Most people don't believe I'm married, because they have never seen my husband after a million years of marriage.

He likes cats. I brought my dog into the relationship. ;>

raw23
11-05-2008, 10:53 AM
We're a lot a like. We have similar personalities, think very much the same, like a lot of the same things. We do have differences and seem to compliment eachother. Like, I'm more caring and have to remind him to be nice sometimes. But when emotion is clouding my judgement he evens me out. We do have differences, but we're more a like.

FB
11-05-2008, 11:52 AM
I'm a complete whirlwind maniac and my husband is very laid back. He says his sport in life is an extreme sport - me.

When either of us are introduced to our acquaintances people find it hard to believe we're a couple. We act entirely different, dress so different and communicate so different.

It works. Love that boy.

nelie
11-05-2008, 12:01 PM
In some ways we are total opposites and in other ways we are very similar. People that don't know us would probably say that we are way too similar. People that do know us would probably say we are opposites.

shantroy
11-05-2008, 02:02 PM
We're different but similar. I'm a little more outgoing, particularly when I meet new people in that situtation he's a bit more reserved. He's a bit more adventurous than I am (he moved to the cayman islands on a whim several years ago, loves to sky drive, mountain bike and so on). I love to shop, malls give him panic attacks, literally! I'm more emotional, he's logical to a fault. (He once gave me a potted plant, b/c it would last longer than cut flowers. He couldn't understand why it wasn't as romantic) But when it comes down to it, we both have the same/similar values and beliefs. Which to me is the most important thing.

mayness
11-05-2008, 02:39 PM
We're mostly similar... we're one of those couples who tell each other jokes without saying anything, because we find all the same things funny and we think so much alike. We're both ridiculously practical -- no one would ever call us romantic! We have common taste in most music, movies, books, and video games.

I tend to like to plan things wayyy ahead of time, while my husband is more relaxed and always reminds me "everything will work out."

I let my emotions take control of my brain more often than he does, although I'd say we're both pretty good at making ourselves think clearly.

Neither of us particularly like being around people, but my husband just *gets* people, says human behavior is all scientific and logical, and he's one of those people who can make anyone like him... while I am confused to no end by most people and usually fail to see the logic.

lizziep
11-06-2008, 01:48 AM
zen- ha! i know what you mean about people not even believing you're married. i was friends w/ several people from work for over a year before any of them even saw him. in 9 years of being together i have only gotten him to go out w/ some friends once. and he's never going to do it again. gah! and forget having people over to the house- never gonna happen.

Schumeany
11-06-2008, 03:52 AM
My husband and I have very similar senses of humor, politics, interests, life views, etc. but our emotional make-up is extremely different. I am generally level-headed, self-confident and optomistic about life -- I guess sort of the steady one. He is extremely up and down with his emotions -- not outwardly so much...not a screamer or anything, but internally. He also has issues with low self-esteem...which still always seems so weird to me, even after 14 years of marriage and 18 years together, because he is this broad-shouldered, 6'2", really handsome guy...but incredibly sensitive so he needs a lot of strokes. He is also, however, the one who remembers anniversaries and birthdays and makes a HUGE deal out of holidays...and I NEVER doubt he loves me and thinks I'm beautiful -- even when I weighed 40 more pounds -- because he tells me all the time, and he is a serious snuggler and hugger. Basically it works out well. I am good at keeping him on an even keel and talking him down when he gets wound up about work, etc., and he gives me all the love I need to go out and conquer the world. I think I'll keep him! :)

raw23
11-07-2008, 02:34 PM
We're mostly similar... we're one of those couples who tell each other jokes without saying anything, because we find all the same things funny and we think so much alike. We're both ridiculously practical -- no one would ever call us romantic! We have common taste in most music, movies, books, and video games.

I tend to like to plan things wayyy ahead of time, while my husband is more relaxed and always reminds me "everything will work out."

I let my emotions take control of my brain more often than he does, although I'd say we're both pretty good at making ourselves think clearly.

Neither of us particularly like being around people, but my husband just *gets* people, says human behavior is all scientific and logical, and he's one of those people who can make anyone like him... while I am confused to no end by most people and usually fail to see the logic.

You're my couple double!! :lol: Everything you said about yourself desribes me, and everything about your guy describes my guy!! And the relationship!
Too weird!
:o

KLK
11-07-2008, 02:55 PM
That's a good question. I think my husband and I are a mixture of similarities and differences. Meaning, we have much different tastes and hobby and interests, but our approach to life, senses of humor, etc. are exactly the same. So, I think we the same KIND of person, even though we like different things.

TJFitnessDiva
11-07-2008, 03:54 PM
My husband and I are pretty different...he's the shy guy who plays RPGs and I'm one of those outgoing crazy people lol Things stay pretty interesting! We do have a few common interests ;)

We've been together for about 15 years...so we must be a good combination!