100 lb. Club - Complacent?

You know how anorexics look in the mirror and see themselves as fat, even when they are sickly thin? I have the opposite, I look in the mirror and I see a woman who is about 130-140 lbs - but I'm NOT!!! There are times (especially looking at pictures!) where I see the real me, but often when I look in the mirror I don't. I am 187 pounds and caught myself telling myself I had lost enough weight and look just fine. AAArgh - I don't really think that! I see people on Biggest Loser who are my size and they aren't very thin. It's like I am sabotaging myself in some new weird whacked out way! Why does this have to so darn hard? Our own minds mess with us - I feel like some drug addict!!!

I have that problem too. I def see myself in the mirror as smaller than I am, which is good for my self confidence....until I see pictures. Oh well.

What your are seeing and feeling is pride in a job well done! You see yourself as smaller because you are! Keep up the good work!

I have the same problem. I weigh the same as I did when I was 9 months prego. However, I see the thin chick from high school!
I think you are doing great! You lost a lot of weight you should be proud!

Yeah it's always the full body pictures that make me go - OH MY GAAAD, THATS ME?!:yikes:

I see myself as I used to look at 150 :) As long as you believe the number on the scale it's all ok!

When I actually saw myself at my starting weight in a picture, it changed my life and made me start this journey.

When i was 305lbs there is no way i felt that big at all. I knew i was overweight, but i didn't see a 300lb person in the mirror. maybe i was in denial. Now i think i see myself as my actual weight. I think you may see yourself as a skinny girl because you've lost so much weight and you are so much smaller than you use to be. congrats on the good work :)

When I was at my highest weight, I was delusional and thought I didn't look all that bad...until I saw myself in pictures or on video. Now that I've lost over 50lbs, I look in the mirror and see myself the exact same way I did when I was at my highest weight. In pictures however, I can tell I look much better. It's weird the mind games we play, huh?

I know exactly how you feel.

On a semi-related note - this 'phenomenon' has been dubbed "Megarexia", and most prevalent among (a very small percentage of) body builders.

Our minds are wonderful things. Maybe it is way of protecting ourselves? I am exactly the same way. Even at my highest (299) I did not see it. Though deep down I knew (if that makes sense) because I would avoid pictures like the plague. You would think I would have figured it when I had to buy size 26 clothing.

I have kinda the same thing. I weigh 240 and dont feel like I look that big. But when I was in highschool and my early 20's I weighed between 170-190 and I felt huge. But I feel the same exact way I did then. So I dont know if I have always felt 250 (even when I was 170) or if I just dont see myself any different whether I weigh 170 or 250. But it is crazy. That is 70 pounds. So how do I not see something different when I look in the mirror.

I am afraid that when I get back down to my goal I am still going to be the fat girl on the inside. So I am trying to deal with the mental issues as I deal with the weight issues. Cause then I will be able to see myself at the weight I am.....

I definitely had this problem. Total denial helped me gain something like 80 lbs from 2000-2002. My pants size went up but my mental image of myself didn't. I won't let that happen again.

I don't get it why I don't see myself as a big woman. I can see the proof on the scale, but when I see myself in the mirror, I am fine. It is when I have a picture taken with another person or even myself is when I freak out about my appearance. Maybe it is because we are comfortable with our size? We feel safe?

Oh yes.. isn't it weird how the mind works. We learned about this in a communications class I took. It is all about how the mind fights to maintain a mental image; it is how you identify yourself... As you grow up you create a mental picture of yourself (talents, looks, personality) and so in cases like where you gain weight, your mind actually fights to maintain that mental image and you continue to see yourself as thinner. It is sometimes why you see people in super tight clothing... they just don't see the weight gain.

You can note this theory in others also, for example: you meet a very attractive person who turns out to be rude, mean, etc. After a while your mind adjusts so that the once attractive person looks down right ugly. It compensates to create a balance.

People losing weight can face this issue not only within themselves, but also, with others around them as the weight comes off. Say your younger sister has always identified herself (mentally) as the outgoing, pretty, skinny sibling... as you start to lose weight and feel better about yourself she can feel threatened. Her mind is forced to reevalutate her mental image/identity. This could lead to unconscious sabotage as her mind fights to maintain balance...

Does that make sense? Maybe I am saying it wrong... oh well.

I was in total denial of how big I really was. I always tried to do what I thought were 'thin' poses in pictures, like I could really hide 100 pounds by turning slightly to the side :rofl:

Now, I have the opposite problem. I just got a picture of myself today from my mom, and I thought "Do I really look like that?" I looked thin.
I asked DH, and his answer was "Well, it's a picture of you, that's what you look like" LOL!

WHEW! I was really worried that it wasn't a common thing!

I'm tall and I always saw myself as average height. 100 lbs ago I saw myself as disgustingly overweight. Today, I can't imagine where I have the fat to lose! I see it in my abdomen, but not 100 lbs!

Kae -- Interesting stuff! I'll have to think that over

Skinnyinsideout -- Congratulations on your 71 lb loss!

Makes me think that we'll all just virtually disappear whenever we get to our goal weights.

I know what you mean.
I hate full length mirrors but know I need one.:o
My face get full last & when you have only small mirrors & avoid the one on your dresser, you don't see it.
But-do you hate shopping as much as I do-talk about depressing! :(

I saw an interview once with Oprah Winfrey and she said at her highest weight she told herself she didn't look over 180 and actually believed it.

I think we can convince ourselves of what we really want to believe sometimes. I had this complacency thing too and told myself that I looked much thinner and "carried my weight well."

I saw a picture of myself back in June and nearly fainted. I really thought I looked GOOD that day. When I saw the picture, I wanted to cry. Who was that pale, bloated person? When I put on my old jeans now they fall to the floor and it's a reminder to me how far I have come and how big I had really gotten.

I absolutely had/have this too! I always thought " sure I'm 300+ lbs, but clearly i must carry it differently" hahahah hilarious!!! Even now, on the biggest loser a DUDE will weigh as much as i do now and be crying and upset at how fat and huge he is YOIKES! The mind is a wonderful shield, to be sure. Basically, I'd check the mirror full body just to be sure the outfit looked ok, but i'd only LOOK at myself from the neck up - be sure hair and make up was nice, etc. but that's about it!!

I have that same issue.. I look in the mirror and think, well I am not that big... but then, my daughter takes a pic of me, and I feel such horrid shame. It has gotten so bad! I think, for me, it is more of a denial thing. I don't really want to believe that I have let this happen to myself.

Fiberlover - Very funny!

When I look at pictures I hate it! I don't think I look like I have lost an ounce. The other day I ran into a friend I hadn't seen in a long time. She said wow your really getting skinny! (lol 204 and skinny HA!) She said what are you doing. I told her and thought does it show...how much did I weight the last time she seen me. Then laughted to myself about being a skinny 204 lbs 5'4 woman!

I definitely have it. When I'm alone in the mirror I think I look just fine. Like others have said when you see a picture of yourself next to other thin people, that's when it hits you.