100 lb. Club - When is enough, enough?

View Full Version : When is enough, enough?

07-13-2008, 10:46 AM
It has been a while since I last posted. I have lost about 120 lbs since Nov. 2006. I have gone from a 24 to a 10 or 12. I still have not hit my goal to be at 160lbs yet. I am around 172 or so, depending on the day. For the past couple of months my weight has sat still. I work out very hard and consistently. I have gone out of town a couple of times, but have still ate within my range of calories. My mom has said to me that maybe this is all my body will let me do. I don't want to beleive that though. So I am just looking for advice from others, who may have gotten to this point or already here just like me. Also, I heard my first negative comment the other day about my weight loss. A lady I use to work with ran into me at the grocery store and was very friendly to me. Then of course she called another coworker and went on to tell her how bad I look. My face was too skinny and so on. I am not even in the healthy weight range on the BMI scale yet. So I know that is not true. I hope someone has some words of encouragement because I desperatley need them now. By the way I am 5'9" in case you are wondering.:?:

07-13-2008, 10:53 AM
You are so cute and pretty! (Your arms look great too, I notice that because the hanging, leftover skin I fear I'll have makes me check out other people's composition).

Maybe view this as your maintenance weight and let your body "adjust" and see what happens? Either way, GREAT job! :bravo: :cp:

At my lowest weight, people said the same things about me (5'9"ish, almost 5'10", 145 and size 9/10). I now will be happy to be as low as 175 probably!

07-13-2008, 10:56 AM
Don't listen to the lady at the store...listen to the lady in the mirror!

Here...this for you! :dust:

Try changing up your workout routine. Try changing your diet. Sometimes your body gets into a "rut" then you become discouraged. Try something else to measure successes. Try doing measurements of several areas and see if you are losing any inches. I know that I have only lost 4-6 lbs, in a month of being successful:mad: but I have lost 34.5 inches:D

So whatever you do don't get discouraged (easier said than done I know) try something different maybe even something new and I am sure it will happen. You have come too far and have done such a great job...keep it up!!

07-13-2008, 11:00 AM
You're at a plateau! I won't advise you, because you've had such a success with weight loss, there's probably nothing I know that you don't! I'll only say: GOOD FOR YOU!!!! You're at a plateau, and you STILL go and work out and eat healthy??!! My girl, if there's a reason to be proud of yourself, that's it!! The lady who was snarky about your weight was out of line. I'm 5'9", too, so I know where the BMI index has the different levels for us. She could have meant that you were pretty while you were still heavy, or she could have just been a jealous whacko! In your picture you are lovely, and you look healthy and in proportion, so don't mind that awful woman. So there!

Maven of Mayhem
07-13-2008, 11:01 AM
I'm just starting my journey so I can't speak from experience yet, but I will relate what my doctor told me. She is very supportive of my weight loss. However, she says that I actually do have a bigger frame (you know that excuse we all like to use? It's really true in my case! LOL) and that I may never see myself in the "healthy" range because that might not be healthy for me. Only time will tell, she said. If I have to eat three meals of lettuce and spend three hours in the gym every day to be a certain weight, then that's not the weight I'm meant to be. I'll eat sensibly and exercise sensibly and I'll take what my body will give me.

That's the theory anyway. I'm so fresh and new and all ;)

About the negative comment... Until I made the decision to lose weight I was threatened by other people's weight loss. I would make those comments to other people about how so-and-so looks too skinny and should maybe eat some bread now and then. It's terrible, but true. I was insecure and that's how i dealt with it. If I could negate someone else's success then that made me feel better about not doing anything about my own weight, know what I mean?

Even if the woman who said those things isn't overweight herself, she may have poor self-imagine and still be cutting you down like that. I think you look FA-BU-LOUS, girl! Way to go! :)

07-13-2008, 11:09 AM
What is you eat is just as important as how many calories. You can eat ice cream and cookies all day and stay withing your calories and it isn't healthy food your body needs. How about posting a day's menu. That may hold clues as to why you aren't losing. Also, how many calories are you eating and how much exercising are you doing. If you aren't eating enough, you also will stop losing. Hope we can get you going again!

07-13-2008, 11:28 AM
You're inspiring! My suggestion is that you maybe get a professional to do a BMI measurement, a real one with calipers etc. The ones on websites are approximations based on weights and heights, individuals vary. That may tell you if your mom is right, or whether you indeed are on a plateau.

In the meantime, remember this close to your goal the loss will be VERY slow.

07-13-2008, 12:06 PM
I think you look fabulous!! Congrats on the weight loss. That is such an inspiration!!

I have told a couple ppl my weight goal is 140, and then I hear, "oh, that's way to skinny" ( it's only 140 ) but I haven't been 140, since prob 1990. So, I don't know.

But I think you look really great, as you are now.

07-13-2008, 12:10 PM
You look wonderful! And healthy!

I'm 4 inches shorter than you, and we have roughly the same starting and current weights (I'm a few pounds up on the number in my sidebar)... and I think I look great (being 4 inches shorter). I'm not necessarily looking to lose more, even though I can see that I am still carrying a lot of fat (and skin).

How do YOU feel about how you look and feel and what you can do? I don't know that you need to pay attention to what anyone says. If you want to lose more, then you may need to find a way to shake things up. But there's also nothing wrong with stopping where you are and trying maintenance (you can always change your mind, too...)


07-13-2008, 12:40 PM
You're inspiring! My suggestion is that you maybe get a professional to do a BMI measurement, a real one with calipers etc.

Hey, Pandora! ;)

I think you mean a body fat percentage analysis or body composition testing. BMI is an inaccurate "measure" of fitness that doesn't account for muscle mass, bone mass/density and so on.

Alliesmom, thats something to consider too...the BMI is BUNK! As others have said, how you feel, how you look, what your level of fitness is and so on is what matters.

07-13-2008, 12:52 PM
You look like a beautiful woman. Don't let anyone tell you anything different. People will say things without thinking about the fact that others have feelings. They'll let stuff fly out of their mouths for some odd reason. I've had comments in the past (when I was skinny) about how I look worse and I KNOW for a fact that wasn't true. I looked MUCH better and I FELT better, so who cares if some people only like chubby cheeks? That's good while we have those chubby cheeks, but once we lose weight (as you have, so amazingly well), we can get our feelings of self worth and accomplishments on our own...without the need for approval or validation from others...especially those who don't love us.

As far as weight loss...I agree. I don't know what you eat in a typical day and the details of your exercise habits. That would help a lot in order for us to give you advice on tweaking your diet to see some more changes. Just hang in there and keep going. YOU CAN DO IT!!!

07-13-2008, 12:55 PM
First of all - and most importantly - your co-worker is jealous. You are gorgeous. That doesn't mean "good-looking for a formerly fat person" that doesn't mean fairly pretty and I'm trying to boost your ego. You're just gorgeous. You have lost 120 pounds. I think people get used to giving labels to the people in their lives, and this woman was comfortable with you being overweight because you weren't threatening. You're not pretty, you're not cute - you're a knockout, and there is no way anyone could see anything different, but it's shocking for someone who was as heavy as you were to be so beautiful underneath it.

I had a friend when I lost 30 pounds one summer (and still had 30 to go) tell me that I would be a disgusting stick if I lost any more weight, and I wouldn't have any breasts. Jealous people just say stupid things to make themselves feel better. She hadn't seen you in a while, didn't realize how much weight you had lost, and probably felt insecure of herself and had to tear you down.

You say you work out a lot. Maybe that's what's really going on - you have a lot of muscle mass. Was there a goal size you were hoping to get to that you didn't, or was it always about the scale weight?

auntie g
07-13-2008, 01:03 PM
Please don't listen to nasty people like that ex co-worker! You look great! The one time I ever got down to my goal weight, I was hearing stuff like that from "well meaning" people, and I was stupid enough to believe them. I thought maybe I should put back on a couple pounds, but then I didn't stop at a couple, and proceeded to gain back 94 lbs! Groan......

What I've learned since that time is that some people say that stuff because their jealous, and some people are just not used to seeing you in a different way. So just hang in there, you're doing great!

07-13-2008, 01:39 PM
I have to say - I think you look great!
You could consider maintaining for a while, and see if that is where your body wants to stay. Some maintainers actually continued losing after they upped their calories to maintenance. Might be the same for you.

07-13-2008, 01:50 PM
You look amazing. Congratulations on your success. Funny how we don't focus on our success but rather on what we feel still needs work. I know it is human nature. Don't give that woman the power. She doesn't deserve it.

Once again you look awesome.

07-13-2008, 02:46 PM
Alliesmom, First, I want to tell you that you are beautiful in your photo. You look like you are at a healthy weight - I don't think your face looks too thin and your arm and upper body look very fit. It does sound like your former coworker was jealous of your success.

You are the only one who knows when enough is enough. Or maybe, like me, it's difficult to know. It's frustrating to work so hard to lose weight, lose so much weight, but find your body doesn't want to go below a certain level and you're not at the goal you had set for yourself. That's where I'm at right now too. Why not maintain for a while now? Mentally, it is a relief to not have to focus on weight loss all of the time. You can maintain for a while then if you decide you want to continue to lose weight, you can start those efforts again. You know that you may have to shake things up some to continue to lose weight. It sounds like what you are doing now isn't going to do it. That's where I'm at now. I'm not sure that I want to drop my calories much lower or that I want to eat fewer carbs or that I want to add/change my exercise. So until I'm ready to change any of that, I'm maintaining for a while.

You've had such success with weight loss, and even if you are not at your goal weight, you've made such fantastic strides. Don't lose sight of that. :hug:

07-13-2008, 02:56 PM
You look great!!! Your former coworker? Sounds like sour grapes to me.

As for the last 12 pounds, how do you feel? How do your clothes fit? You're able to do things you couldn't do at one point? I think if you feel you MUST get there, keep a food journal for a week, then meet with a trainer, go over your journal & tell the person what you've been doing for exercise & then see if the trainer has any tips/tricks for you.

07-13-2008, 04:06 PM
I remember now why I use to post a lot. All of your words are very much encouraging to me. To answer some of the questions that were brought up, I thought I would just add them here.

I am very close to my number weight loss goal as well as my size goal. I would like to wear a size 10 without the "muffin top" that we have come to call the bulging belly over the waist of my pants. I am where I want to be on the upper half of my body. I wear mediums and some larges depending on the cut of the top. I am disappointed in my chest. I have gone from a 44D to a 34A. I just bought that bra this weekend and I am sad to say it fit. I don't mind the 34 but the A is tough. My stomach is what I am most unhappy with. Very saggy and wrinkly with a lot of stretch marks some from kids but realistically most from being obese. I am considering surgery for next summer. I am giving my bidy one more year to see what is naturally going to happen. I may have a tummy tuck and maybe a boob job.

As for my workout routine and eating habits. I consider myself a gym rat. I look at it like a second job. Soon it will be my second job because I am becoming a fitness instructor at the gym I go to. I have made it through the first round of audtions and will do the final round soon. I will be certified in October. I jog three miles twice a week, 45 minutes on the elliptical three times a week, I take cycle for 45 minutes three times a week, I weight train twice a week. I have a stationary bike at home that I get on for an hour in the evenings four days a week. Some days I have worked out for 3 or more hours, not always a straight three hours. I work out hard and usually only take off one day a week. I am more fit than I could have ever imagined. I actually have muscles. I keep my calorie intake around 1600-1800 calories. I eat a lot of protein. I stay away from white flour and rice almost always. I eat a lot of fruits and veggies. I do not eat sugar if I can help it. I cook using olive oil. Below is my typical day of fodd choices...

BF carbmaster yogurt with 1/2 c cottage cheese and 1/2 cup cut up grapes
Snack fiber one bar
Lunch salad with fat free catalina dressing very little cheese lots of veggies,
5 oz chicken, apple, animal crackers (12)
snack banana, rice cake with 1 tbsp peanut butter
dinner lots of veggies, lean meat, 1 cup of some kind of fruit

I have several cups of coffee a day with very little creamer and splenda, i have 1 maybe 2 diet drinks a day and green tea with splenda

twice a week I splurge and get a McDOnalds ice cream cone YUM!!!!

07-13-2008, 08:21 PM
Hi Alliesmom, Frankly you look fantastic- but I can understand wanting to get to goal particularly since you work so hard. Maybe you are working out too hard and your body needs a break??? I tend to go at things with intensity as well and I find that sometimes I need to back it off a bit. For me it doesn't help to up my calories but to cut back on activity and let my body recover and stop protecting my metabolism. It might be worth a shot if you really want to see if you can move the scale for a few more pounds. The only other thing that you may want to consider is do you have enough fat in your diet?

math puppy
07-13-2008, 08:26 PM
i just looked at your pic, and you are so adorable! you look great, you face is perfectly proportioned. that lady was just so jelouse that you could do somthing so great for yourself. rock on!

07-14-2008, 10:56 AM
Alliesmom, I think enough is enough when...

1. You're eating and living healthy, while being at a healthy weight
2. You're happy with weight and your look

Also, maybe you haven't gotten to the exact weight you first imagined because you're a self-proclaimed "gym rat". You said you have muscles, so perhaps you're muscle mass is making up the extra few pounds.(?) I'm not sure, but I agree with all the other ladies that you look amazing. Hopefully, you feel amazing too and that's all that really matters.