Weight Loss Support - I'm discouraged




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thesusanone
07-07-2008, 05:24 AM
I've been dieting since February when I got really sick and lost my appetite. The docs never did tell me what the problem was, but I have kept up with healthy eating because I feel better that way. My appetite slowly returned and is pretty normal now. Yet I wasn't tempted to over-eat because I was feeling very much in control on my healthy eating plan.

But this 4th of July holiday really messed me up. I stayed over at my parents' house and was tempted to eat rich food. Now I am trying to get back on my diet plan but I am totally disorganized and don't have healthy food prepared. Tomorrow (today, actually), I'm going to prep some healthy foods and keep them handy. But it still feels bad to have been off-plan for 3 days. I feel bloated and moody. I'm really discouraged. I thought I was through with binge eating and unhealthy foods. I really thought that something was different this time and I wouldn't be tempted. But how quickly I fell once I stumbled!

Thanks for listening! If you have any kind words of wisdom, please feel free to share them.


srmb60
07-07-2008, 06:11 AM
You've made amazing progress and three days cannot remove that from you. Old habits die hard. Almost all of us have periods of time when we do ... well, not as good ... it doesn't matter in the long run.

Just do well for more time than you ... don't.

JayEll
07-07-2008, 07:05 AM
You're learning! Next time you're going to stay at your parents' house, you'll know to plan ahead and take some of your healthy foods with you, if needed.

Old habits come back really fast, and that's worth finding out... So chalk it up as a learning experience and get back on track. :yes:

Changing habits with food takes time and effort, and for awhile you may have to simply avoid certain foods completely. But remember it's not forever, it's just for now!

Jay


Farseashore
07-07-2008, 08:03 AM
The important part is that you are back on plan. Forgive yourself and move on!

I made some fairly poor choices over the weekend too, but I was back on plan after getting home last night. My weight is up a bit today, but I know it will be gone again soon. I also know I will learn from this and improve next time, but still not be "perfect". I accept that.

I think even a lot of maintainers still struggle with temptation from time to time. The trick seems to be to get right back to your plan.

Pandora123a
07-07-2008, 08:21 AM
Susan, I sometimes think about eating as "what would a 'normal' i.e thin person do. I notice that my thin friends sometimes overeat, they indulge for a meal or a vacation. The difference seems to be that they don't flog themselves afterwards, or see this as permanent, only as a vacation and one that needs to end afterwards.

I sometimes wish that magically my overeating will disappear. I am coming to believe that the goal is not never to overeat or indulge, it is to manage that eating so that afterwards I revert to plan. Perhaps even more important is that I don't follow up the wrong eating by punishing myself by escalating my eating and really reverting to bad patterns.

It was a holiday weekend with your parents. You ate wrong. Now its over and you are reminded how much better you feel when you eat differently.

You can do this!

PinkyPie
07-07-2008, 08:30 AM
3 days out of a possible 150 is not bad at all! Pick yourself up, dust yourself off and move forward! We all have slip-ups and off days. That's what life is about!
You can do this girl!!!

Heather
07-07-2008, 09:10 AM
Unfortunately, I don't know many (any) people for whom these "bad" habits disappear. We can control them and create strategies to deal with cravings, but I have been saddened, too, to see how quickly my bad habits can return.

So, you are not alone!!

Try to learn from the experience to make things better in the future, and find new strategies. And do try to get right back on plan! (I sometimes find it takes a few days to get completely back on plan!)

ladybugnessa
07-07-2008, 09:13 AM
2 years into this weight loss thing and yesterday had I not just said NO it would have been an all out binge fest... as it was i ate way more than planned anyway.

hugs to you, it never ever gets easier...

bargoo
07-07-2008, 09:45 AM
The best thing about dieting is we can start over at any time. Just get back on plan and don't beat yourself up over this slip. You have made a great start with the 31 pounds lost .

Rain Dancer
07-07-2008, 10:02 AM
I really can't add any more words of wisdom to the already wonderful advice you have already received. I just want to give you my support and encouragement. Don't give up, don't beat yourself up. You are doing so wonderfully well. Hang tough, girl! You can do this! :hug:

McKenziesmomma
07-07-2008, 10:07 AM
I'm sorry you had a slip up:( I know the holidays and get-to-gethers can be rough! I try very hard to plan ahead for these times...or have an imput to what the menu is going to be (grilled chicken if possible or lean burgers etc)

You have lost over 30 lbs :cheer::cheer: that is what you should be focusing on! That is sooooo awesome! Be proud of yourself! I have actually heard that you need a good splurge every now and then to shock your body and keep you from hitting a major plateau. Even if you gain 5 lbs or so from the splurge....look at it this way....you would still be down like 26 lbs! THAT IS AMAZING!!!!! Those 5 lbs would go away as soon as you get back on track.

I don't know what you gained or even if you did...I was just using that as an example! You are a very strong and amazing person! Keep up the good work!


http://tickers.TickerFactory.com/ezt/t/wN3X5sB/weight.png
(http://www.TickerFactory.com/weight-loss/wN3X5sB/)

Spoz
07-07-2008, 10:24 AM
I've learnt that every slip up or binge is A GIFT. Although they can be very disheartening, look at them as an opportunity to understand yourself and your slip ups. This is the most positive thing you can do and you'll also learn from it!

I think among all of us we get so far in our diets and think we're invincible and that we only need willpower to begin with. But thats exactly what a slip up is - something that creeps in. You just need to me more careful next time and be prepared. You can absolutely get back on track and start losing weight again. Three days in the long run is nothing :hug:

luckymommy
07-07-2008, 10:28 AM
Knowledge is power. You have some more info about yourself, so don't feel defeated...feel empowered. Hang in there and jump back on that wagon! You can do it because you already have done it....you just gotta do it some more! Big hugs to you....we all feel defeated by what we view as our failures....but if we feel empowered with the knowledge of what happened, why it happend and what we can do about it....well, that's the ultimate power. Weight loss, as you probably already know, is not about motivation. It's about commitment and consistency. You have had many more good days than bad...many! Just be commited to your goal and forgive yourself because the ability to resist temptation can only last so long. Also, sometimes, when I slip up and get back on and work extra hard for a week or so, I find that my body is tricked into losing more weight than normal because it doesn't expect this and anything new (even some binges) can lead to a jolt to the system! Just don't beat yourself up because that will accomplish nothing good. Hugs to you!

Tomato
07-07-2008, 10:28 AM
Don't be discouraged, slip-ups happen. Also, don't waste any time with regrets or flogging yourself for what happened ... just move on. Just start eating healthy again.

KLK
07-07-2008, 10:33 AM
Question: Did you BINGE or did you just overeat a bit? I think there is a difference, especially at a party or on a holiday. Binging is like... taking the whole plate of brownies into the bathroom and eating them one after another with the door locked. Or having an entire box of cereal. Overeating at a party is having a hot dog, some potato salad, a few drinks, some pasta salad. Then another hot dog and then dessert. There is a difference, I think, in the obsessiveness of the eating.

But over-eating/binging might always be a struggle for you. Even YEARS after I thought I had myself way under control, I still binged occasionally. Doing this often WILL disrupt your weightloss attempts and I understand why you feel discouraged, BUT three days won't make or break you. My advice is to get back on the horse IMMEDIATELY, drink lots of water to alleviate the bloating and -- whatever you do -- do NOT weigh yourself.

:hug: Good luck! You'll be fine -- just don't think ab this weekend anymore.

JulieJ08
07-07-2008, 11:26 AM
Three days is nothing if it stays at three days! And I just don't think that 3 days off plan in July, after starting in February (or thereabouts), is "quickly" stumbling. You're doing just fine.

I'm sure even in your best case scenario, you lose the weight and maintain for life, you don't see yourself being *that* perfect. So really, this is just a perfect learning exercise for (1) how to get back on track and (2) to look back and learn how you could have prevented or lessened it.

Without that lesson, "messing up" and getting back on track is a big scary unknown. Which makes many people *more* likely to fall. But when you really do know, from experience, that you can be a little imperfect sometimes, and recover just fine, it's not so scary, and that fear doesn't have to sabotage you.

thesusanone
07-07-2008, 02:07 PM
I'm floored by the wisdom and kind support of all you guys!!! Thanks so much! It has really helped me to read through your messages this morning. I'm preparing some healthy food as I type this. When I get back from the doctors today, and I'm hungry, I'll have healthy choices at my fingertips. This is a learning experience. Back to the new healthy lifestyle!!!

p.s. I am bringing a plastic storage bowl filled with black beans, brown rice, veggies and a little fat free italian dressing. I'll even remember to bring a fork and napkin, plus a water bottle. I have learned from past experiences not to leave home without bringing healthy food. I hate getting ravenous, setting myself up for a binge later in the day.

Heather
07-07-2008, 02:22 PM
I almost never leave the house without a small serving of almonds, or some kind of snack! It really helps me! Good luck!

ddc
07-07-2008, 02:40 PM
Sounds like you're back on track.

I felt really bloated and "hung-over" this morning--problem is, I didn't have any alcohol-LOL. Just lots of salty food. I told myself before I got out of bed that I wasn't going to weigh-but I did it anyway :(

Then I thought "I'll do a water fast today"-LOL. That didn't work either.
I am going to drink alot of water and eat clean today though.

Best wishes to you :)

and remember:
Failure is not falling down, Failure is staying down.

Silverstar33
07-07-2008, 03:42 PM
Question: Did you BINGE or did you just overeat a bit? I think there is a difference, especially at a party or on a holiday.


I've been wondering about this myself. I know that there are many people who struggle with true binges, but at times it seems people are using the terms overeat and binge interchangeably (I'm certainly not implying this is one of them, but this is one the first times I've seen the distinction come up).

I remember reading a post where someone mentioned they binged on three pieces of pizza at dinner with the family. I guess that it could be a binge, but it just isn't a word that I use lightly and I hate to see anyone beating themself up, especially if they really didn't go overboard.

KLK
07-07-2008, 04:09 PM
I think it's an important distinction to make... imo, anyone could overeat; it doesn't mean you're lacking in control over yourself with regard to food. People with relatively few food issues do occasionally overeat, esp. at parties when they maybe aren't paying attention to what and how much they're eating and drinking. But binging is a serious problem brought on by emotional and/or chemical addictions to food, you eat compulsively even when you tell yourself you need to stop. And of course, not ever overweight person has a binging problem (and not every thin person doesn't).

Speaking for myself... overeating and binging *feel* different. Overeating happens when I'm still a tad hungry and think I can have another slice of pizza but wind up feeling WAY full. Binging is when I'm DRAWN to the box of cereal... drawn to it even when I realize I drank all the milk, drawn when I feel so gross and full I wanna throw up, drawn to then eat something ELSE when the cereal is finished...

But I dont know, of course, what happened in this case -- I just thought it was important to distinguish.


I've been wondering about this myself. I know that there are many people who struggle with true binges, but at times it seems people are using the terms overeat and binge interchangeably (I'm certainly not implying this is one of them, but this is one the first times I've seen the distinction come up).

I remember reading a post where someone mentioned they binged on three pieces of pizza at dinner with the family. I guess that it could be a binge, but it just isn't a word that I use lightly and I hate to see anyone beating themself up, especially if they really didn't go overboard.

Rain Dancer
07-07-2008, 04:59 PM
I think it's an important distinction to make... imo, anyone could overeat; it doesn't mean you're lacking in control over yourself with regard to food. People with relatively few food issues do occasionally overeat, esp. at parties when they maybe aren't paying attention to what and how much they're eating and drinking. But binging is a serious problem brought on by emotional and/or chemical addictions to food, you eat compulsively even when you tell yourself you need to stop. And of course, not ever overweight person has a binging problem (and not every thin person doesn't).

Speaking for myself... overeating and binging *feel* different. Overeating happens when I'm still a tad hungry and think I can have another slice of pizza but wind up feeling WAY full. Binging is when I'm DRAWN to the box of cereal... drawn to it even when I realize I drank all the milk, drawn when I feel so gross and full I wanna throw up, drawn to then eat something ELSE when the cereal is finished...

But I dont know, of course, what happened in this case -- I just thought it was important to distinguish.

I agree. A binge, for me is a total, out of control feeding frenzy that doesn't stop until I am helpless, sick, hardly able to move and usually crying, while frantically tearing my kitchen apart, looking for more.

My binges are an attempt to mask pain. And they are temporary anesthesia, at best. The numb out doesn't last long. And when it is gone, I am left feeling sick, gross, ashamed and in more pain than when I started.

Bonita Applebaum
07-07-2008, 05:11 PM
Yeah, don't beat yourself up! I consumed BBQ chicken, a hot link, potato salad and two chimichangas:o:?: over 4th of July weekend. It sucks but I'll be in spinning tonight working my a** off!

Silverstar33
07-07-2008, 05:17 PM
Bonita, on a side note, how do you like spinning? I've thought about trying it, but I've been a little nervous because of stories I've heard about crazy intensity.

chick_in_the_hat
07-08-2008, 12:37 AM
silverstar33 - spinning ROCKS! Get there like 15 minutes before class so the instructor can help you set up your bike and give pointers. The first few times will prolly feel crazy intense but it gets easier. The good thing about spin is that no one else knows how much restistance you put on. You can make the ride as easy or hard as you want it to be. The other selling point of spin for me is that I don't have to be coordinated like in a step class. :cb: