Weight Loss Support - I seriously feel like dying




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lily780
07-03-2008, 01:41 PM
New to the boards. Long story short, I have struggled with weight my entire life. I managed to pick myself up out of a deep depression and lost 57 pounds...I had only 15 pounds until my goal weight. Last month something in me wasn't right and on and off the entire month I binged. Not every day, but on and off and in between I ate healthy and exercised occasionally. I looked on the scale today and I gained 20 POUNDS!! How is this even possible when I wasn't even binge eating every day??? Not to mention, it took 6 months to LOSE 57 pounds, and less than ONE month to gain 20 pounds??? I even waited one day to see if it was water weigh but it still reads that I gained 20 pounds. I feel sooo horrible and I am doing everything in my power to lose 20 pounds this month at least. I don't care what anyone says, if I could GAIN that much in less than a month I can lose it in less than a month. Janet Jackson lost 20 pounds a month, so could I. I am so sick of this. I had come SO FAR and I gained 20 pounds in around 3 weeks total?? I am so upset.


SoulBliss
07-03-2008, 01:48 PM
Please focus on the positive...You successfully lost weight and kept some of it off! Just get right back on plan. :hug:

JayEll
07-03-2008, 02:03 PM
Hey! :wel3fc:

It's probably not all fat--some of it is water weight, some of it may even be lean body mass.

The reason you can gain faster than you lose is because there's no upper limit on how many calories a person can eat. It really is possible to eat, say, 2,000 calories MORE than your maintenance number in a day. But, you can't go down to zero calories and expect that to work. Not for long... :no:

You haven't mentioned what your weight loss plan is. Are you doing Weight Watchers, South Beach, calorie counting...? If you give us some specifics, we might be able to make suggestions. But I do want to caution you about thinking you can lose 20 pounds in a month and keep it off. 1-2 pounds a week, on average, is considered a healthy rate of loss.

Hang in there! You haven't gained it all back yet! You can reverse this!

Jay


marbleflys
07-03-2008, 02:07 PM
Boy I know that feeling....I was on Zoloft a few years ago for depression and I was gaining every week....talk about feeling depressed after I stepped on the scale to have gained 8 lbs. in a week!

but you can't undo what happened, so you've taken the first step, you've put the breaks on and will move forward...pat yourself on the back, you will take it off again and be even wiser when close to your goal....(you can kick me in the butt on the way, because I am slacking big-time too)

Alpinkatze
07-03-2008, 02:17 PM
A hug is coming your way from another emotional eater! :hug:
I agree with the others, do focus on the positive. You did lose a lot, and so what if you fell of the waggon for a moment. Just get back on and keep going! You'll lose some more, and even if you gain some of that back again, after that you'll lose more. Don't put so much pressure on yourself. Take it step by step. What counts in the end is the balance sheet, not the steps that lead you there. Ups and downs are normal. Don't beat yourself up about them. And anyway, weight lost too fast is bound to reappear eventually. So take your time, that's perfectly ok!

xxxtine
07-03-2008, 02:20 PM
That's tough. But, it's true. You can't go into the past and erase what happened.Now you can take hold of the future and prove to yourself that you're the one in control.

Here we go again
07-03-2008, 02:54 PM
I agree with what everyone said so far. At least you still have lost weight. You have stopped the weight gain now. So good job!

Also, you said that something in you wasn't right and that's why you binged. Have you thought of a plan to distract you or fill your time when you feel like just eating?

I believe that everything we go through has a purpose and nothing is wasted. So even in this situation, you learn how to distract yourself so you don't emotional binge eat, couldn't it be worth it? You are making descisions today that will effect your health for the rest of your life.

Give yourself some dap because you are worth it! Take it one day at a time. Six months or a year will totally fly by in no time at all.

lily780
07-03-2008, 04:45 PM
Hey! :wel3fc:

It's probably not all fat--some of it is water weight, some of it may even be lean body mass.

The reason you can gain faster than you lose is because there's no upper limit on how many calories a person can eat. It really is possible to eat, say, 2,000 calories MORE than your maintenance number in a day. But, you can't go down to zero calories and expect that to work. Not for long... :no:

You haven't mentioned what your weight loss plan is. Are you doing Weight Watchers, South Beach, calorie counting...? If you give us some specifics, we might be able to make suggestions. But I do want to caution you about thinking you can lose 20 pounds in a month and keep it off. 1-2 pounds a week, on average, is considered a healthy rate of loss.

Hang in there! You haven't gained it all back yet! You can reverse this!

Jay

I am calorie counting. Eating the recommended amount of calories for me and working out. I wonder how long water weight can bloat you because I waited one day and I was still that weight, but today I have been going to the bathroom a lot and feel a tiny bit less bloated. I just cannot wait 1-2 pounds a week at this point. I started my healthy diet in november, struggling everyday and working my butt off. My whole goal was to be able to have fun this summer and wear a bathing suit because EVERY summer I spend inside on a diet or binge eating. So I am only going to lose the extra amount I gained fast, then lose the last 15 slowly. I cannot keep waiting. If I wait 1 pound a week I wont even be done til NEXT november! That is ridiculous given I was working out TWICE a day not including weight training every other day. I don't plan on starving do don't worry, but I do plan on exercising like crazy.

Pandora123a
07-03-2008, 04:49 PM
Lily, you can throw away the rest of your loss or pick yourself up and move forward. You remain 37 pounds lighter than you were six months ago, that's huge. (I'm hoping to get to where you are.)

What's concerning me is that you got yourself out of a deep depression to do this, and then last month suddenly started binging off and on. Don't let this trigger another depression.

Have you thought at all about getting some therapy to help you with the depression. Someone once told me that when we stop binging we find out just how much sadness/anger we are washing down with our milk and cookies. It might help to figure out what your eating means, and how you might cope with those things differently.

Hang on...this is doable.

lily780
07-03-2008, 04:53 PM
Lily, you can throw away the rest of your loss or pick yourself up and move forward. You remain 37 pounds lighter than you were six months ago, that's huge. (I'm hoping to get to where you are.)

What's concerning me is that you got yourself out of a deep depression to do this, and then last month suddenly started binging off and on. Don't let this trigger another depression.

Have you thought at all about getting some therapy to help you with the depression. Someone once told me that when we stop binging we find out just how much sadness/anger we are washing down with our milk and cookies. It might help to figure out what your eating means, and how you might cope with those things differently.

Hang on...this is doable.

Thanks for the concern, I actually do strugle with depression. The thing is, I am supposed to be put on zoloft this month to help me with my binge eating. But now I hear it causes weight gain so I am freaking out even more. Sure it doesn't happen to everyone who is put on it, but at this point I could barely get out of bed with my depression over my weight gain...if I gain on this pill I will be done. :( But thanks everyone for the support.

Pandora123a
07-03-2008, 05:26 PM
Lily,

No weight gain from zoloft could be worse than 20 pounds a month! If your depression lifts you will be able to handle your food better, and also to add more exercise...which is a natural anti-depressive drug!

Hang on, we are here when you need us.

skinnybeach
07-03-2008, 09:55 PM
PANDORA is absolutely right. Either you keep working on it 1 lb a week, or you quit and gain it all back. The choice is yours.

ImpalaHoarder
07-03-2008, 10:18 PM
I agree. There is absolutely no reason you can't keep going. And there is absolutely no reason, even though you may look forward to what you'll gain with better eating and exercise, not to go out, go swimming and show yourself off in a bathing suit right now. Grab the moment, have a great time! If people act like jerks about it, that's their faults. Don't let your disappointment at not losing as much as you wanted stop you from enjoying your summer, and please, do your best to lose maintainably. It is well, well worth it in the long run.

Exercising like you do, I think you could manage 3 pounds a week, but trying for more is honestly both dangerous and unrealistic. You're simply not going to be able to do it, because it's impossible, so don't beat yourself up about it. Keep in mind that the more slowly you lose, the better your skin will look, and the better the chance that you will be gaining lean muscle, not just losing fat, or even muscle, and lean muscle is, after all, what looks good in a swimsuit. Just do what you can, and remember- even when it seems like you're not going anywhere, you are getting to your goal weight, one day at a time. Just keep going. You will get there.

Hart
07-03-2008, 10:55 PM
From experience, if it is water weight just drink a lot of water for 2 days and keep your sodium levels a few hundred below recommended intake level. Perhaps add some coffee or extra caffine to help it along.

Also, throw out the "tomorrow is a new day" mentality, today is the day, right now! If I eat something bad or off plan, then I try to just move on and make the next thing I eat much more mindful and healthy. If you don't go to the gym one day- go for longer the next or add something else. You can rectify any mistake, you have forgive yourself. Don't expect perfection- we are all flawed and make mistakes. Unreasonable expectations lead to feeling like a failure. You only really fail when you choose not to continue- NOT when you make mistakes!

FOCUS on the positive. Not what you DID wrong but what you CAN DO right!

You CAN do it! :)

NoVaVTFan
07-03-2008, 11:26 PM
You say Janet Jackson lost 20 pounds in a month, so why can't you - well, you don't know what she was doing to lose those 20 pounds - she could have been starving herself therefore damaging herself internally which isn't going to be good for you in the long run because you will most likely put those 20 pounds back on plus some if you lose so quickly. Also, everyone's body is different - just because one person can lose 20 pounds in a month doesn't mean you can do it in a healthy way. Even if you did lose 20 pounds in a month then you will probably gain it back because it sounds like you have an issue with dieting then binging then dieting then binging, and that's not a good cycle.

I agree with others that you need to get help with this cycle and your depression. I understand your fear of gaining weight from medication, but you can control that by eating right and exercising, plus most people only gain about 5 pounds on antidepressants and that might be worth it to get your self in control. I have been on and off antidepressants for 6 years and I'm on them right now for anxiety. I have not had any weight gain from it, but it certainly has helped me with my emotions and anxiety which helps stay on plan.

Also, so what if it takes until next November to get to your goal? I've been on 3FC for a year now, and I've been losing weight in a healthy way for 15 months, and I have seen over and over and over on here how losing weight fast usually just leads to gaining it back plus more. I used to get frustrated too because it was taking so long to get to my goal, but then I just tried to relax and realize that I will get there eventually. Just think - 1 pound a week for a year, is 52 pounds a year - that's a lot in a year, so don't be so upset if you only lose 1 pound a week. I used to think a year is a long time, but lately I find the years going by faster and faster, so don't be in such a hurry. Most people who are in a hurry to lose weight gain it back and that's not what you want in the end. Take your time, but don't wait to have fun - you don't have to be skinny or thin to have fun. You can have fun while losing weight, don't wait to be skinny to have fun. Go ahead and wear your bathing suit at whatever weight you are and just have fun.

By the way, can you give us more of your stats (I didn't see them above) - your age, height, weight, daily calorie intake? That might help others give you more suggestions like if your goal weight seems low you might now have as much to lose as you think.

Lori Bell
07-03-2008, 11:32 PM
Thanks for the concern, I actually do strugle with depression. The thing is, I am supposed to be put on zoloft this month to help me with my binge eating. But now I hear it causes weight gain so I am freaking out even more. Sure it doesn't happen to everyone who is put on it, but at this point I could barely get out of bed with my depression over my weight gain...if I gain on this pill I will be done. :( But thanks everyone for the support.

Hey Honey...hang in there. First I want to share a little secret with you. Zoloft does not have any calories in it. Zoloft does not make you gain weight. My sister has taken Zoloft for over a year and met her goal and maintains her weight loss during this time. Some people may gain weight initially while taking depression meds, but the effect comes from overeating. When some people get to the point they consider meds, they usually have already begun to self medicate, (with their drug of choice, be it food, alcohol, drugs etc.).

My point is, many people associate depression drugs with weight gain, but usually the gaining starts before the medication was even started and contines until the drug actually reaches it's peak effectiveness in your body. It can take 2 months before the meds are fully effective, and as you know, a person can gain a lot of weight in a month. So don't worry about that...There are also other depression drugs to consider with your doctor. Wellbutrin is an effective antidepressant and seems to help some people quit smoking and lose weight....just a thought to discuss with your doctor.

I know where you are coming from, I can gain weight faster than anyone I know. I have gained 12 pounds in one week before. It sucks. Just remember there is time to overcome this. Don't do anything drastic.

Rayne33
07-03-2008, 11:51 PM
Hang in there! I have been struggling with Bulemia for several years now. My doctor put the fear of God in me about all of the health issues I was suffering from as a result of this disease so I have quit the self induced vomitting - However - I still have the binges and emotional eating. I, too, just recently gained more weight back due to binging. So I understand the emotional roller coaster you are going through after losing so much weight and gaining some back - but try to stay positive. Like everyone else has posted- you cannot change the past - it is what it is - you have to push through and move forward. Every day is a new day!

Two years ago, a fellow 3FC member sent me a magnet in a christmas card - it said, "sometimes courage is not always a loud rawr - some times courage is the soft voice at the end of the day that says "I will try again tomorrow". I keep this on my refrigerator as a reminder of all of the great support I have on this board; as a reminder that I am not alone in my weight struggles; and as a reminder not to beat myself up when I fall of the wagon. I just try to focus on the future and get myself back on track.

Good Luck! Stay Positive, Sweetie! :hug:

lily780
07-04-2008, 12:16 AM
You say Janet Jackson lost 20 pounds in a month, so why can't you - well, you don't know what she was doing to lose those 20 pounds - she could have been starving herself therefore damaging herself internally which isn't going to be good for you in the long run because you will most likely put those 20 pounds back on plus some if you lose so quickly. Also, everyone's body is different - just because one person can lose 20 pounds in a month doesn't mean you can do it in a healthy way. Even if you did lose 20 pounds in a month then you will probably gain it back because it sounds like you have an issue with dieting then binging then dieting then binging, and that's not a good cycle.

I agree with others that you need to get help with this cycle and your depression. I understand your fear of gaining weight from medication, but you can control that by eating right and exercising, plus most people only gain about 5 pounds on antidepressants and that might be worth it to get your self in control. I have been on and off antidepressants for 6 years and I'm on them right now for anxiety. I have not had any weight gain from it, but it certainly has helped me with my emotions and anxiety which helps stay on plan.

Also, so what if it takes until next November to get to your goal? I've been on 3FC for a year now, and I've been losing weight in a healthy way for 15 months, and I have seen over and over and over on here how losing weight fast usually just leads to gaining it back plus more. I used to get frustrated too because it was taking so long to get to my goal, but then I just tried to relax and realize that I will get there eventually. Just think - 1 pound a week for a year, is 52 pounds a year - that's a lot in a year, so don't be so upset if you only lose 1 pound a week. I used to think a year is a long time, but lately I find the years going by faster and faster, so don't be in such a hurry. Most people who are in a hurry to lose weight gain it back and that's not what you want in the end. Take your time, but don't wait to have fun - you don't have to be skinny or thin to have fun. You can have fun while losing weight, don't wait to be skinny to have fun. Go ahead and wear your bathing suit at whatever weight you are and just have fun.

By the way, can you give us more of your stats (I didn't see them above) - your age, height, weight, daily calorie intake? That might help others give you more suggestions like if your goal weight seems low you might now have as much to lose as you think.

Thank you everyone for the positive help. I needed it. I do think a lot was water weight because the main place I see any significant gain is my stomach. I am 21 years old, I am around 5'4 and my goal is 115-120 pounds. I got to 130 pounds...binged and looked at the scale and it read 150 pounds. I cried a lot. But I did have A LOT of sodium....a lotttt. Anyhow, I am making the decision to be on zoloft for this reason alone. I can't keep going through the ups and downs of my weight and have this control my life. I need help and hopefully I will get it. Thank yall a bunch.

missygith
07-04-2008, 12:49 AM
Lily, do you have the money or time Ms. Jackson has? The amount she spends on a personal trainer alone prob. parallels my salary. Then there is the time issue. I've read how celebrities will spend 4-6 hours in the gym every day! I cant afford the time or the money for this kind of junk weight loss. (All that and they still get airbrushed for the final printing of what ever mag they are gracing us with this week.) Bah to Janet! One thing you must remember too... Janets weight fluctuates! Chubby Janet from the 80's, rock hard Janet from the 90's, chubby Janet from the early 00's... see a pattern?
NoVaVTfan, I love how you broke down the whole 1 pound a week thing. 52 pounds in a year rocks! Thanks for the prespective!
Lily, if you could do it once, you know it can be done! You know you can lose the weight. 20lbs sucks but its not 100! We are all on your side here, keep moving foward!:hat:

Alpinkatze
07-04-2008, 03:25 AM
I totally second what NovaVTFan said! Don't lose weight fast - ever! Not even those 20 pounds. They'll only come back and bring some more with them. It's no use, only stress for you and your body. Do work on the psychological aspect instead - it really sounds like you're an emotional eater, and in that case, in the long run that will be the only thing that will help. You have to get real there. I'm telling you this from my own experience. It took me years to understand this, though.
Oh, and about summer: You lost a lot of weight. 37 pounds is GREAT! Do get out there and wear a bathing suit. Be proud of the loss you had so far, and have fun in the sun! After all, you're not there to decorate anyone's miserable world. And I'm sure you're beautiful the way you are, with or without the pounds.

AJ113
07-05-2008, 07:16 AM
........If I wait 1 pound a week I wont even be done til NEXT november! ........Or you can carry on as you have been doing and gain 20 pounds each month until next November. Which would you prefer, a gain of 340 pounds or a loss of 70 pounds? There is no such thing as successful fast weight loss (not in my experience anyway). Losing weight is all about a change of lifestyle, breaking old habits and developing new ones, which can only be done over extended time periods.

Although your scales may be showing a 20 pound gain, I doubt that it is all body fat. That would mean an intake of 70000 (seventy thousand) calories over and above your daily calorie burn in the space of 30 days. I doubt that's even possible.

You say that you have been working out, have you considered that some of your weight gain may be due to increased muscle mass? What is your size like? Do you measure yourself? If so, have your measurements increased pro-rata to a 20-pound weight gain? Do you actually look like you have gained 20 pounds?

You came off the rails, it's no biggie, we've all done that, now dust yourself off and get straight back on them again.

JayEll
07-05-2008, 08:00 AM
AJ113, it is not likely to be muscle gain--women can't gain 20 pounds of muscle, or even 10, in one month. In fact, I doubt that men can. So, although some small amount could be muscle... not much.

It is possible, though, to gain 20 pounds of non-muscle in one month. Eating 2300 calories over maintenance level every day, on average, would do it--and unfortunately it's not that hard to eat that much more. Not when we consider that one meal at McDonalds could add up to 1200 calories or more. :eek: I once ate a "healthy" roast beef sandwich at a shop that turned out to contain about that many calories--and I learned from that experience! :yikes:

However, I still think that lily780 was indeed seeing water weight as well as fat.

lily780, good luck with your struggle! :cheer2: :cheer3:

Jay