100 lb. Club - In a bad place in my head
04-28-2008, 08:40 PM
I'm beyond discouraged.
I know it's harder to lose weight when you're older (I'm 56), but between menopause, sinus surgery (which kept me laid up for awhile), a knee injury (which kept me limping for *quite* awhile), and a horrendously stressful job that keeps me tethered to a desk/phone/computer, my weight is way up there, and I'm so physically unfit it's pathetic.
I just want to give up. I don't want to care about my weight anymore. I'm so burned out on doing things I don't want to do (like exercise when I'm exhausted and everything hurts) , and doing without things I *do* want (like the "bad" foods that taste so good,). Plus I'm surrounded by people who either don't have weight problems (damn them! :mad:), or people who lose any weight they gain easily. (Note to self: never get another job at a university!
One thing I've been doing faithfully over the past month or so is yoga. I'm in no danger of looking like the people in the pictures, but it does loosen up my joints, makes movement easier, and relaxes my ever-racing mind. With yoga, I feel as though I'm working *with* my body instead of *against* it. (Does that make any sense?)
I guess I need to adjust my attitude so that I see eating properly and other exercise as something I'm doing *for* my body, instead of something I'm doing *to* it, or doing *without*. I'm having a hard time with it right now, and being so darned self-critical ain't helping!
Getting some of this out of my head makes me feel less desperate. Thanks for listening!
04-28-2008, 08:50 PM
3fc lets me rant more often than not and you're on the right track with the yoga - do what you can. You wont be able to start a full blown exercise/lifestyle change off the bat.. but you can make consistent small changes... and gain strength to slowly add more in as you go.
:hug: dont give up. you're worth more than that!
04-28-2008, 08:51 PM
A lot of life ends up being how we look at things. For me, it meant thinking about adding in foods like fruits, veggies, whole grains, instead of taking away foods, like sweets and lots of pasta with cheese. Truly, the more I add in healthier foods, the less I desire the less nutritious. Not that I can never have them, because I most certainly can! But, that, I don't crave them now nearly as much.
For you it might mean forgetting that you have weight to lose, and instead focusing on feeling healthier, with some weight loss as a side benefit.
I think it's fabulous that you're practicing yoga (something I'm just slowly learning about). As I practice, I'm reminded that this body isn't an object like a piece of art that I hang on a wall and polish every few months, but a strong, moving, organic machine. It's not really anything that I own, either, because it's me. What I am doing to my body, I am doing to myself. There is no separation.
Sorry for the rambling.
Really & truly, you can do this! Keep at it.
04-28-2008, 09:05 PM
Thanks so much for the instant reinforcement! It has helped me tremendously.
Yup, things will be as difficult as I choose to make them. I'm tired of difficult. I think I'll do...restorative!
Hello Cynn, You should go to your local library and check out the book "confessions of a carb queen" It addresses alot of the issues your talking about.
04-29-2008, 12:55 PM
I've been there. It sucks when you feel like you are being deprived of all the good things in life and that you HAVE to do exercise. I found I tend to give up a lot easier with that mindset. This time around I am focusing on my health and changing my eating habits and I love exercise. I have found things I enjoy doing and you can bet that if I didn't do exercise in the morning or on my lunch break I will do some before bed.
Hang in there.
04-29-2008, 01:50 PM
cynnymynn - I totalling understand what you are saying where you are coming from. For years I was exactly where you are. It's wonderful that you are doing yoga - it's so good for you.
I have physical problems too - it's a chronic tendon problem in my foot/ankle and a back problem that is a result of the foot problem. So I really understand your frustration. I do daily stretches and some stregthening - but, do no formal exercise routine. I am still losing weight. It's slow - but, it's coming off. You can only do what you can do.
I think it's hard to face "trying again". But, you don't have to look at the whole picture. Maybe you can add a couple things a week...drinking extra water, eating more fruits and vegetables, etc.
Please know that we are here to cheer you on or hold your hand in your journey.
PS - since you like yoga - maybe try daily meditation. WOW - it is the key to any success I've had with food of late. Just a thought.
04-29-2008, 02:43 PM
I think you're in need of some "reframing".
I had some physical problems too, resulting in a knee surgery last September. The knee still gives me pain, sometimes, and it was certainly painful then. I let myself get into a depression cycle..."Ugh, this HURTS, it SUCKS, I HATE that I have to exercise to maintain my weight". One day, though, it occurred to me that I was looking at it all wrong. I wasn't cursed that I had to exercise...I was blessed that I COULD. The knee hurt some, but it was on the mend, and I was fortunate that the surgery went well and that I was able to use my knee.
Once I reframed, every workout became exciting, especially as I started getting stronger. I embraced physical therapy, was excited about my stairclimber sessions, and generally happy to be strong and getting stronger.
So what can you reframe in your life to help you recognize the positive, wonderful things about this lifestyle change? Find a statement that reflects that reframing, repeat it to yourself when your motivation flags, and repeat. Before long, it sinks in! My favorite reframe statements are:
-Eating healthy foods makes my body feel so great, and I'm so fortunate to have access to all of these tasty things.
-It's so wonderful to be able to manage my anxiety/depression through exercise, and I always feel so great when I'm done!
-I'm so grateful for the time I get each day to cook - it's a great way to finish off a workday and relax.
04-29-2008, 03:53 PM
Here's the thing about losing weight when you're older though... the more you lose when your'e older, the more beneficial it will be to you!
It might be harder to lose weight when you get older, but it's harder to do EVERYTHING the older you get. So those older bones, older joints, older heart, etc... older EVERYTHING is gonna have a MUCH harder time working if you don't work on the weight first!!!! So tough it out NOW to work on the weight so that the WEIGHT doesnt' make life even tougher for you the older you get!!!
You can do this! It is possible!