20-Somethings - Anger read as jealousy?




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MCheyenne6
04-17-2008, 04:10 PM
I feel weird. There is a girl about 4 years younger than me that I work with. She is about 5'9'' and she is about 115 lbs. She has breast implants that are huge and she is continuously saying how fat she is and that she wants lipo.

She is continously trying out new diets and new ways to starve and not eat anything fun. Now I told her I'm on weight watchers and she wants to do it too.

I'm annoyed not because I want to be 115lbs, but because she not only does not appreciate her size, but she keeps trying to ge thinner and thinner. People like me and maybe some of you have had to struggle and miss perfect wants to weigh zero. When I talk to my boyfriend about my agitation (sp?) he says I'm jealous.

I swear I'm not jealous!!!!! grrrr


MonteCristo
04-17-2008, 04:30 PM
I had a similar problem with a guy in my office. I swear, he was looked like a toothpick, but he was always talking about how fat he was, how his pants didn't fit anymore, and that he was starting a new diet (every week). Sometimes I wanted to twist him up like a pretzel and throw him straight out the window! A almost everyone else in our office is a bit weight challenged, and I think we were all getting a little tired of him. Fortunatly for me (thought I do feel a bit sorry for him) he is no longer with us.

SCraver
04-17-2008, 04:40 PM
I hope this doesn't come out wrong - (I do not think you are jealous, btw) but sounds to me like she has an eating disorder. I am 5'9" and if I got down to 115, I would be anorexic and emaciated. (I know, everyone is different.) But this really sounds like unhealhty thinking/behavior. This girl is probably so wrapped up in herself and her weight, that she doesn't even think about how it may sound to you = or if she does have an eating disorder - she may think of herself as overweight as you?

Try not to be angry! At least you are trying to lose weight to be healthy, not to be a tooth pick!! ;)
:hug:


yoyonomoreinvegas
04-17-2008, 04:48 PM
I know it's really irritating to have to deal with people like that but maybe when she looks in the mirror she sees herself as the same size as you? I made it clear down to 120 lbs once and still saw nothing but these enormous thighs when I looked in the mirror - and I talked all the time about needing to lose weight. Once a lady called me "skinny minnie" and I thought she was making fun of me. Granted, there are a lot of people out there who will fish for compliments but, since this girl has already had one plastic surgery, she may be teetering on body dysmorphic disorder. OK, that probably doesn't really make you feel any better - but keep her in mind when you reach your goal and let the memory of her not appreciating what she had make you enjoy your success all the more :)

MCheyenne6
04-17-2008, 04:56 PM
I know it's really irritating to have to deal with people like that but maybe when she looks in the mirror she sees herself as the same size as you?

I think maybe that is it. It also makes me feel strange because she seems to like me and I tolerate her even in her naiveness (real word???) but I feel weird because maybe she thinks I'm a whale since she thinks she herself is fat.

She just might have a disorder, you guys are right. I have known my boyfriend for years, but we have only been dating for 3. In high school he was obsessed with the skinny, what I call "throw-up girls". I'm dropping my pounds for myself, but I just dont have the desire to be extremely thin.

Taylor86
04-17-2008, 04:59 PM
That girl is in need of what I call a Breadstick Intervention!!!

FriendlysRage
04-17-2008, 05:26 PM
HAHAHAHAHAHA. I want one, too.

Robin41
04-17-2008, 05:36 PM
I wouldn't worry about whether she thinks you look like a whale or not. Anybody that obsessed with their own looks, whether it's a disorder or just being self-centered, isn't giving anybody else's looks two cents worth of their attention.

CandyKisses0204
04-17-2008, 05:57 PM
dont worry about her. All women have insecurities and even though she may be thin she is insecure about something on her body. and umm a little sidenote about your bf mine would have gotten an earfull if he told me i was jealous cause some girl was skinny. but just ignore her be the bigger person

cephalopod gal
04-17-2008, 06:32 PM
That girl is in need of what I call a Breadstick Intervention!!!

OMG what does that mean?

That sounds like an amazing phrase that I want to incorporate into everyday conversation (even if it doesn't make sense in the context I use it).

CookieMonster416
04-18-2008, 12:21 PM
At the same time; however, you don't know what this person has gone through. I mean I am always trying to be super healthy and working out and talking about how hard it is to stay on track. People who don't know me are like wow why is this girl that doesn't really have any weight to lose so obsessed. What they don't know is that I have lost a lot of weight and struggle everyday to maintain. If I didn't worry then I would balloon right back up to where I was.

QueenBee3
04-18-2008, 12:46 PM
You know you're not jealous, so that's all that matters. Girls like that will have self-image issues whether they are 130 lbs or 80 lbs. Some people can't accept the fact that a bigger girl might just genuinely dislike a certain characteristic about a skinny person, without being jealous. Grrrr don't worry about it.

MCheyenne6
04-18-2008, 01:46 PM
a bigger girl might just genuinely dislike a certain characteristic about a skinny person, without being jealous. Grrrr don't worry about it.

You took the words out of my mouth!!