Hey guys,
This is me just blowing off some steam. The topic is a little personal, but I think most of you can understand the situation so I figured I would share. You guys are like a big family to me, and I know I can lean on people here when things get tough. I very much appreciate that.
So a little history before I begin. 4 years ago, the first time I got a Pap test, it came back as ASCUS I, meaning my cells were abnormal. I got another pap like 6 months later- came back the same way. I eventually had a colposcopy and a biopsy of my cervix (very painful procedure for me). However, the biopsy came back negative for abnormalities, and the following Pap I got after that came back completely normal. My doctor had no answers for me, other than maybe I had somehow gotten two back to back false-postive paps. The problem hasn't resurfaced again... until now.
When I moved to NY after getting married, I obviously had to find a new gyn, and I did. They had a policy of "if you don't hear from us within 10 days, you're fine." Well, it's been well over a month since my pap with them, and they just called Thursday night to tell me I needed a colposcopy. No information on what my pap actually said, just that I need to schedule one. I was upset. Maybe I snapped at the woman a little bit. But I was trying to explain to her that a colposcopy seemed a little hasty given my last experience with paps. She snapped back at me, "Well, the doctor says you need one, so you have to get one." and I said thank you and hung up. Maybe it's just me, but I don't appreciate being told that I have no choice in what tests I have to take for my own health. It is my body after all, and I know my history better than anyone else.
So I called the office yesterday. I taled to a very nice woman. I wanted to know what my test actually said. She said it came back with ASCUS II, one step up from the first incident. I told her my story about the pap and the colposcopy and the whole matter. She bluntly came out and told me- "Well, the only way you can have this reading is if you have HPV. So you must have it." I came back with "Well, I appreciate the answer you gave, but I have to tell you, that is impossible." She was like- "and why is that impossible?" And I answered, "because my husband is the only partner I have ever had, and I am the only partner my husband has ever had, and we have always used condoms." What I got for a response was "Hmm. Well, that is a little bit of a puzzler isn't it?" So I said, "Yes it is. Since it seems so unlikely that I actually have HPV, I think there's a better chance that the Pap is wrong, and rather than go through a colposcopy again, I think it makes more sense for me to get another pap and an HPV test FIRST." Her reply? "I am sorry, I can't do that. You are scheduled for a colposcopy (which she scheduled me for WITHOUT even asking if the date and time were okay) and I can't change it. I'll put a little note in it though, saying that you don't want the test. but, if the doctor still says you need one, then she'll do one." I asked her if she could have the doctor call me between now and the appointment (which is a week from now) and her answer was "No, sorry. She doesn't have any free time at all between now and then. You'll just have to talk to her when you come in for your colposcopy." I said thank you and hung up.
Here's my problem...
Since when did I lose the right to decide what can be done to my body? Since when does a doctor that I have only seen once know more about me than I do? And, why on earth do I keep getting these crazy pap readings??? Honestly... could I have somehow caught HPV by shaking someone's hand? I am so confused and so angry. I feel like this new office feels as though they control me. I also feel scared that somehow I contracted HPV (the leading cause of cervical cancer) even though I have been as safe as humanly possible, and I wonder what else I could have ever done to protect myself since I was already taking all the steps they tell you to take. Any advice? Did I do something wrong here? Anybody have any experience with this? I feel so... betrayed and feel as though my rights are being violated.
If your doctor and this doctor's staff is not giving you the answers you're looking for, can you find another one?
They should never schedule you for something that you do not agree to first. And for a doctor not to make time to properly explain why it is they think this degree of work is necessary... I'm sure they're a busy person, but you're a patient, and a customer.
It's your body. Get a second opinion. Or, call in, cancel the appointment that they made without your consent & schedule a sit down with the doctor. They should be willing to talk with you about options, not just "This is the way we do it, because I said so."
There is an HPV vaccine. You can speak to your doctor about this as well.
There are many wonderful doctors out there. But, they're all human, so it's important to find one that you're comfortable with.
Seems to me that your doctor, and his/her nurses and office staff, are not only rude and inconsiderate, but are seriously overstepping personal and professional boundaries. I've never heard of any doctor scheduling an appointment without consulting the patient, or refusing to allow the patient to refuse the procedure. In fact, I've never heard of a doctor that refused to meet with a patient before such a big procedure to discuss concerns.
If it was me, I'd tell them to cancel the appointment and find a new doctor, and start all over.
I can relate, though...I had an abnormal pap smear in 2004, but my colposcopy was canceled without my knowledge. I got a new job and didn't get insurance for months, but as soon as possible had another pap and the results were once again abnormal. So they did the colposcopy and found what they determined were pre-cancerous cells, and scheduled me for the LEEP procedure, where they literally burn the abnormal cells off of the cervix with an electrified wand, the DAY before I left my job to move. It wasn't pretty because the deadening stuff kept wearing off, and it took forever.
But now I've got a doctor who's helpful and great, and I haven't had any problems since!
Your Dr. should take the time to explain your test results, your options, and what the procedure will be. Drs. are human and make errors, too and I feel that it is important for people to stay informed about their own health.
With that being said, I would do some reading on HPV. It is my understanding that it is VERY common, condoms do not protect against it, and often the only way to tell if you have it is through pap smears (unless you have a strain that causes warts). Which means that men can carry the virus without ever knowing it (unless, like I said, there are warts).
I know someone who had an abnormal pap smear and they told her to come in for the LEEP procedure. They thought it was a mild case - but when she got there for her appt. it had already spread and was upgraded to an agressive strain. It is VERY IMPORTANT to not let this go.
I would never go back. Either the doctor's staff is dismissive and uncaring, or the doctor is, or both.
If you can't just find a new one, I'd call back and demand to leave a message for the doctor (see if he/she has voicemail). You can explain there and see what happens. Firmly but politely tell the front office staff that you don't wish to discuss the care you'll be getting with them, and you want to leave a message directly for the doctor.
They also can't do a medical procedure without your consent...it'd be illegal. So make sure you use the terminology "I don't consent to this test" with the staff, which will mean they CANNOT do the test until they DO get your consent.
I'd try to switch if possible, though, because that's ludicrous!
Any doctor that won't (or 'doesn't have time') to talk to you is not worth your time, money and most importantly health!! RUN, don't walk to a new doctor!!!
SCraver- I have done a lot of reading on HPV, and you would be surprised how much the sources differ on information. Some say any skin to skin contact (like shaking hands with an infected person) can be enough, and some say having unprotected sex with someone who has had multiple partners is practically the only way to catch it. I know that there are over 130 strains of the disease, only some of which cause warts... and the ones that actually cause the warts aren't the same ones that cause displasia and cancer. I still can't figure out how I coul dhave caught it. when I say sexual partner, I mean like, ANYTHING. My husband has KISSED one girl other than me, and my husband is the only guy I have ever kissed or done anything else with. One of us would have had to pick it up by some obscure means, which seems just so odd to me. If you can honestly catch it by shaking hands with someone, they should have public service announcements saying that- rather than calling it an STD. When I think STD, I think some sort of sexual contact is necessary to contract it.
I will definitely get a new doctor when this whole thing is over. However, I feel the need to continue with this doctor now, so that I can explaint he situation and maybe give the doctor a new experience. Since no matter what I seem to be a bit of a freak of nature when it comes to this stuff, maybe I can serve as a learning experience for this doctor. I will say right now though... when I go in for that appointment, I am going to sit up on that table and tell the doctor point blank: there will be no colposcopy today, I want you to listen to what I have to say, I want you to understand what I am saying, and I want you to work with me to come up with a better plan on how to handle this.
There was a woman I worked with who said that some people are born with it... I thought that she was nuts. But these are all questions your Dr. should be answered for you. I am glad to hear that you are going to talk to the Dr. b/f deciding on the procedure.
However, I feel the need to continue with this doctor now, so that I can explaint he situation and maybe give the doctor a new experience. Since no matter what I seem to be a bit of a freak of nature when it comes to this stuff, maybe I can serve as a learning experience for this doctor. I will say right now though... when I go in for that appointment, I am going to sit up on that table and tell the doctor point blank: there will be no colposcopy today, I want you to listen to what I have to say, I want you to understand what I am saying, and I want you to work with me to come up with a better plan on how to handle this.
Wow you're a much bigger person that I am! I'd RUN as fast as I could from that doc. This has me SO angry. Just who the **** do they think they are? They CAN NOT make you take a test that you do not consent to. Period. It's against the law. How DARE they treat you and speak to you the way that they did? They make an appointment for a test you say you don't want and don't even confer w/you? I've never heard of such a thing! The doc CAN'T call you back? What kind of B.S. is that? There isn't a chance I'd venture back into that office; I'd scout out new docs (references from friends and co-workers and such) and move on.
But since you seem set on going back to him, make sure you keep your legs crossed when you tell him - loudly - NO!!! to the test.
"Persistent HPV infections are now recognized as the major cause of cervical cancer."(emphasis added) from cancer.gov
Not ALL cervical cancers are caused by HPV. I am not a doc, but I don't believe they can tell from a mere pap test what caused the abnormal cells. I think your doc's office is just 'playing the odds' on that bit.
Personally, I would cancel my appointment and find another doc. If speed were of the essence and I couldn't quickly get another doc, I would go to a clinic (there are anonymous STD clinics all over the place) for another test and to arrange quick treatment.
Good luck to you. My daughter went through the abnormal pap and cauterization a year ago. Hard on the nerves.
SCraver- I have done a lot of reading on HPV, and you would be surprised how much the sources differ on information. Some say any skin to skin contact (like shaking hands with an infected person) can be enough, and some say having unprotected sex with someone who has had multiple partners is practically the only way to catch it. I know that there are over 130 strains of the disease, only some of which cause warts... and the ones that actually cause the warts aren't the same ones that cause displasia and cancer. I still can't figure out how I coul dhave caught it. when I say sexual partner, I mean like, ANYTHING. My husband has KISSED one girl other than me, and my husband is the only guy I have ever kissed or done anything else with. One of us would have had to pick it up by some obscure means, which seems just so odd to me. If you can honestly catch it by shaking hands with someone, they should have public service announcements saying that- rather than calling it an STD. When I think STD, I think some sort of sexual contact is necessary to contract it.
I will definitely get a new doctor when this whole thing is over. However, I feel the need to continue with this doctor now, so that I can explaint he situation and maybe give the doctor a new experience. Since no matter what I seem to be a bit of a freak of nature when it comes to this stuff, maybe I can serve as a learning experience for this doctor. I will say right now though... when I go in for that appointment, I am going to sit up on that table and tell the doctor point blank: there will be no colposcopy today, I want you to listen to what I have to say, I want you to understand what I am saying, and I want you to work with me to come up with a better plan on how to handle this.
Some STDs aren't only transmitted through sexual intercourse. So, the fact is that it is possible even if unlikely that you may have HPV.
I wish you all the best This sounds like a very frustrating thing to be going through with a doctor.
I agree...FIND A NEW DOCTOR! They have no right to schedule ANYTHING without your consent. It's YOUR body, and your rights are being pushed aside. Don't take it from them.
Ask your friends or coworkers about THEIR ob-gyns and get a few recommendations. A lot of ladies will schedule a "meeting" with a potential ob-gyn before actually being checked out, just to make sure that doctor is up to their standards. It's a very personal field, so you want to feel as comfortable as possible with the person that's poking around your insides!
But I would definitely NOT go back to that office, and I would get a second opinion. But be sure to tell the new doctor (whomever you're comfortable with) about your total medical history with your last ob-gyn.
HPV is VERY common among women...if I remember correctly, I think I read that about 75% of women are diagnosed with it at some point (I've had it, and I've had the procedure done to remove it).
So keep your head up! Things will get better...as soon as you find a doctor that you are comfortable with!
I agree with the others - FIND ANOTHER DOCTOR. Wow, how uncaring...not to mention rude.
I love, love, love my gyn. I even put up with long waiting around in his waiting room/examination room, even though I get so pissed when I'm in the moment. Then he comes in and really listens and takes his time, asks me about my family, etc. He's just a really caring person. (And up until him I never went to a man!) It can take a good month or two to get on his calendar for my annual appt. However if I had an emergency or serious concern, I know they'd fit me in. I've been seeing him for about 7 years.
During that time I had one funky pap test showing abnormality. My doc suggested that we keep a close eye on it because abnormal pap tests can be...well, quite normal!
I was retested every 6 months for 2 years. During that time all pap tests came back normal and then I went back to my annual appt schedule. So I do understand the fear that comes up with an abnormal reading but I don't understand the lack of compassion within your doctors office!!!
Ask around - neighbors, co-workers, etc. - who do they go to? And do they love their doc? You may find a real gem.
They were completely inappropriate with you. It deserves a letter to the office and the GYN chaiperson of whichever institution the practice is affiliated. My blood is boiling for you.
And, you should get the results in person, in your hand before you switch doctors. (which I strongly suggest)
It could be your doctor doesn't know what going on... but the doctor and his/her staff are completely in the wrong!!
I see you have alot of replies to your post, and I haven't had time to read them, but I feel compelled to just add my two cents.
First of all, you do not know that you have HPV. The nurse made a very irresponsible remark by saying that "you must" have it, when in fact that has not been confirmed by your doctor. The nurses behavior has been very unprofessional and the doctor may or may not know about how his nurses are handling his patients. You should write a letter to the physician that you saw and follow up by filing a complaint with the American Med. Association, or whomever. I'm not sure who you file a complaint with, but this should be posted in the office somewhere. The nurse basically gave you a diagnosis on the phone, which is not legal. She may have opened up the doctor to a lawsuit, which he should know about. If you don't keep quiet, you may be saving alot of women the misery of dealing with these nurses. He needs to get rid of them. At the very least they should know that their behavior will have consequences.
I would definitely go to another doctor, with a better staff. A second opinion is always valuable. Definitely do not neglect your health because of this bad experience. Look until you find someone who is in tune with you, and who you are comfortable with. If you like your doctor and staff, you are more likely to go in and take care of things.
I'm sorry you are going through this, but be strong and do whatever you have to take care of you. ((HUGS)) Please keep us posted!
OT- Angry and Confused (a bit personal)
This sounds like a very frustrating thing to be going through with a doctor.
