I've never had anorexia but from I understand that when one who has anorexia looks in the mirror they see that they are fat but in reality they are not. I think I have whatever is the opposite of anorexia. I tend to look in the mirror and at least when I have clothes on think that I'm thinner than I am. Then, when I look at a photo of myself wearing the same outfit I think "Huh, I looked better in my mirror than I do in real life". I just saw a photo of myself in one of my favorite dress up shirts and in the photo my stomach is HUMONGOUS and boobs so small. I'm completely discouraged! How did I get to this point and why is my mind so twisted. How do I change my thinking to be more truthful? Seriously, a distortion of accurate thinking and I don't understand why this is.
I am actually the exact same way. I think part of my issue is that I want to feel good about how I look, and that gets tough for me sometimes, so I present myself in the mirror at the angles that flatter me most. And actually, I don't think that it's good for me to think that I'm fat all of the time, so as long as I keep working my program to improve ('cuz I've never been in such denial that I didn't know I needed to improve!), I'll take whatever good feelings I can find. I don't think I've ever known anyone who took weight off in a healthy way with horrible thoughts about themselves floating in their heads.
So, if you want my vote, I say let the denial (if that's really what it is instead of just unflattering pictures, etc.) work for you! In my experience, the better I feel about myself, the more sure I am that I can conquer the weight control demons, and that may be true for you as well.
I am another person who just does not photograph well- no matter what my weight! In the mirror, I can see the sparkle in my eyes, the confidence in my stance, - the things that I feel make me look good! "Presence" often doesn't photograph well, either. It might be that the "real" you is what you see in the mirror and in person, with all of those special intangibles that make you glow!
It's because we grow into our weight. Little by little, we have ourselves fooled that we really aren't that big. I really hate my before pictures - I feel some disgust about them, and I certainly didn't feel that way at the time. I felt I was dressed neatly, my hair was always done and I didn't look unkempt. I don't know who I was trying to kid - I was fat. I use those pics as motivation now, and they work!
Don't forget that you are always looking out from yourself and at other people. Pictures show you the view that others see. It's kind of like listening to your voice on a recording and how different it sounds.
I also think that pictures are a bit peculiar in that they capture just an instant in time, whereas in real life, we are moving around and animated. I find that I look at pictures of other people and think it looks like them, but I think that I look different in pictures than in the mirror. It is weird.
Heh, I don't know about you, but when I look in a mirror, I immediately move so I look my best. Stomach in, shoulders back, non goofy expression on my face, good posture, face angled so I have cheekbone goodness, yank down my shirt so it lies smoothly against me. When someone else is pointing a camera at us, we don't have that immediate feedback to maneuver into "optimal good looking mode."
Actually the worst is when you think you don't look too badly looking in the mirror. Then you get your picture taken with someone much smaller standing next to you and see how big you really look.....it's like a reality slap in the face!
I know exactly what you mean. Until I was about 280 or so, I never saw myself as big as I was. When I would tell my family this, My Dad would just shake his head. I think it was partly because I only looked in full length mirrors briefly and when I looked in the mirror above the sink I would lean in and look thinner. Plus I manage very well considering my weight so I was further able to deny it.
That is surely the truth! I look great when I'm ALONE but standing next to somebody of a normal size tells the story. I'm always shocked when I see pictures.
What doesn't help is that I still have a waistline. No matter how big I get my waist is always at least 17 inches smaller than my hips. Which tells you just how big my hips are ...
I'm the same way! I don't ever "feel" like I'm as fat as I really am... Its weird. My last birthday was a good example. I got all "dolled up", and thought by looking at myself in the mirror that I looked awesome... Later I saw pictures of that night, and I was like "EEEEK! Who is that?!".
I think it is a distortion of ourselves as well. I have the same "opposite of anorexia" syndrome as well.
Have you ever had your voice recorded and when you listen to it you go "WTH that doesn't sound like me!" It's because we don't hear ourselves the same way as other people hear us.
I've always though I carried my weight well too until I see a picture or had to pull out the bigger pair of pants so they'd fit. Body image is very distored no matter who you are.
I was watching that new show "How too look good naked" and they take the person into a room with serveral other people dressed in tight gym wear and have the person pick out their body double. 90% of the time the person ALWAYS picks out someone bigger than what they really are.
I also saw a show once where a woman was having body image issues and what they did was laid her down and drew an outline of her body and then held it up for her to see. She was shocked because she thought it looked thinner than what she thought she was.
I don't think it matters what weight you are you will always think you aren't thin enough or that there is something "wrong" with your body. That just reflects so poorly on todays society. We are so bombarded with images of what is the "right" way to look, even plus-sized, that we can never see the beauty in ourselves anymore.
I'm usually okay with my body, but I am never happy with the scale, LOL I wish the scale could reflect how much I feel I weigh rather than what I acctually weigh, LOL.
We usually stand close to a mirror and very little appears surrounding us, while in photos there is usually at least some other objects or people by which our relative size difference becomes more obvious. If you've ever stood in front of a double wide store mirror with someone beside you or even racks and items in the background, you would appear large to yourself as you do in the photo because of the contrast with objects. I had the shock of having that happen a few months ago and it was one of the prompts that motivated me to eat better. By the way, this is the same type of effect that makes the moon look huge on the horizon and smaller over head.
One of the things that convinced me to lose weight was standing naked in front of a full-length mirror. Without the clothes, there it all was. Front, sidewise, no way to make it look any better with a pose.
I think in some ways I'm the same -- I always think I look huge in pictures, but don't look that bad in the mirror. Honestly, though, I really don't think it's a problem. It's a perspective that lets me leave the house in the morning. I do one last check in the mirror, think, "Ok, I look good," and then am out the door. (Every so often, that one last check leaves me going, "What are you thinking? You can't wear that!" and then I change my outfit.) But I would much prefer leaving the house in the morning thinking that I look presentable and even good, than thinking, "Ok, you look horribly fat and disgusting. Have a good day!"
One of the things that convinced me to lose weight was standing naked in front of a full-length mirror. Without the clothes, there it all was. Front, sidewise, no way to make it look any better with a pose.
I used to joke the best diet was to eat all your meals naked, in front of a mirror
In the Mirror
