Weight Loss Support - Hmmmm?

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02-05-2008, 07:09 PM
:?: I'm just wondering, is this obsession really worth it... worrying about my weight is making me tired.. its my 3rd day of consistent work out and i can barley move... i thought working out was supposed to give you endorphins and make you happy, but i feel more depressed today then i did a week ago when i was downing cookies..... why am i doing this to myself... why cant i just be happy being fat!! does it get any better? will i ever feel like its worth it... I'm getting real emotional about this, and i need support...

02-05-2008, 07:16 PM
Hey CapriPants.

Is it possible you're taking too many steps, too fast? On the exercising especially? If you are starting at a level that it way too high for your current fitness level, you're going to be overly sore and burn yourself out. Working out doesn't mean you have to work yourself to exhaustion!

Of course, there are people who are happy overweight, but it doesn't sound like you are one of those people. Give your plan a week or two...my guess is that things will settle down for you soon and you'll feel a lot better.

Hang in there!

02-05-2008, 07:17 PM
I feel ya. I work out and I just want to go home, sit on the couch and eat afterwards. Maybe you're working out a little too hard? I found that the hardest thing for me was getting into the routine of going to the gym. I didn't mind it so much once it became the same as walking the dog, go because it has to be done. Do the dishes because they have to be done. Do the laundry because it has to be done. Eat bcause it has to be done (not that eating was ever an issue for me). Pee because it has to be done. GO TO THE GYM BECAUSE IT HAS TO BE DONE. That's how I look at it. I would rather be proactive. You look like you're pretty young (as am I). I think getting healthy now will make the rest of our lives better. I would not want to be older and have an even harder time losing weight.

02-05-2008, 07:24 PM
Yeah but when you look at trainers working people out, they dont go soft on them.. so why should i take it slow? im just so confused about whats right and wrong in this journey

02-05-2008, 07:43 PM
Yeah but when you look at trainers working people out, they dont go soft on them.. so why should i take it slow? im just so confused about whats right and wrong in this journey

Perhaps, but those people are with a trainer. Someone who is aware of how that person is exercising, how often & how much. If you're just starting out, I doubt a trainer would burn you out. Those people have probably worked up to the level that they're on now.

Maybe you should try to get some time in with a trainer so they can tell you what's appropriate for your fitness level.

It's dangerous to push yourself too far, too fast. You could really injure a joint.

02-05-2008, 08:05 PM
True, but like Mandalinn mentioned, they may not be at a comparable fitness level to you. Maybe those folks getting their butts kicked by personal trainers have been at it a while longer than you have? Either way, it's no use comparing your ability to someone else's: you are where you are, and that's ok! :D

For sure, though, jumping in too quickly is a sure way to burn-out early or worse, suffer an injury. Maybe you'd be better served by taking things one step at a time. Focus on exercise first, then diet (or vice-versa)... or do both, but in more moderate steps? Just suggestions.

02-05-2008, 08:19 PM
thats true.. im just blah i guess... i felt so good yesterday after the work out and today i feel blah... i guess we all have days like this... i just cant wait till it passes... Thanks you all

02-05-2008, 08:23 PM
thats true.. im just blah i guess... i felt so good yesterday after the work out and today i feel blah... i guess we all have days like this... i just cant wait till it passes... Thanks you all


02-05-2008, 08:36 PM
People watch Biggest Loser, where the film editors make a point of showing people grimacing and sweating at their breaking point, and it looks like that's what working out is supposed to be like. It's not true. It's given a spin for the purposes of drama.

Yes, you have to sweat, but you should never be unable to catch your breath when exercising. If you are terribly sore, you are doing too much and too fast. Go every day, but vary what you do from day to day. Don't do weight machines two days in a row unless you do upper body one day and lower body the next. Use the exercise bike one day, the treadmill the next.

From your photo you look like a younger person. Why not just stay fat? Why not just be happy eating cookies? Well...

It's not about feeling better, it's about getting better. I can tell you from experience that it doesn't get easier to lose weight later on. NOW is the best time to lower your weight, become fit, and learn how to eat properly, so that you can maintain your weight at a lower level.

Don't try to fix everything in one week... you didn't gain the weight overnight, and it won't go away overnight, either. Darn it. ;)


02-05-2008, 09:19 PM
What everyone else said. There are days when I come home from the gym and feel like it's all just too much. I'm disgusting and sweaty and my legs hurt and I'm hungry and ... why the **** am I doing this to myself anyway.

But you know ... when you start to see those first results, it will make it all worth while. It really will. The first time I saw my cheekbones I cried - and then I called a friend and left her a crazy voicemail message saying "I Have cheekbones!!!!"


Hang in there and remember, as others have said, you didn't gain the weight in a week. It won't come off in a week either.

02-05-2008, 10:06 PM
Oh, yeah - you can be happy being fat. I was - for YEARS. Perfectly happy. Every excuse in the book happy. But, Jay is right on - one day you will wake up and the knees will start to hurt, then you will find yourself leaning on things to support you because you find it difficult to stand without support for any length of time. Then you will drop something and seriously consider HOW you will pick it up and be able to right yourself without finding a wall/chair for support. You will go hiking with your kids and realize that you can't keep up. You will...
You will finally realize that you can no longer be happy being fat. You will be compromising your quality of life, which will make you very sad.

Take this advice from an "ol' lady" or not - but, my recommendation is - slow down the exercise so that you ENJOY it! Learn to change your lifestyle now - move more - eat less. Take it slow, and celebrate small changes that you can sustain forever. Do NOT fool yourself by thinking that it won't catch up with you. It will.

02-05-2008, 11:59 PM
wow thank you all for your support... it really does mean a lot to me...

you know what i don't think is fair, when you go to AA you get someone you can call and they can talk you out of that drink, but when your addicted to food, you don't get a sponsor... i could have really used one today... before i downed the package of cookies... o well, tomorrow starts a new day....

02-06-2008, 12:51 AM
If you want a sponsor, you can get one (or hundreds). Overeaters Anonymous is a 12-step program for compulsive overeaters, patterned after AA. But in OA, just like AA, you're not assigned a sponsor. If you feel you need one, you have to ask someone to be your sponsor. This site is a lot like having hundreds of sponsors.

TOPS, is also a great support group for people wanting support with weight loss. It's a non-profit group, meeting weekly for weigh-ins, fellowship, and support. It is relatively inexpensive. $24 per year which included a monthly magazine, and a monthly meeting fee that varies from group to group (in our group it's $3 a month, the national average is under $5). Most groups run fun little diet and exercise challenges periodically, and give small prize.

Everyone will tell you to lose weight while you're young, because it only gets harder, and harder, and harder as you get older. When I was young, I grew very tired of hearing it, and while I tried to lose weight over and over again, I never sustained the commitment long enough because I didn't realize how very much "worth it" the effort would be. It wasn't that I didn't believe the advice of the "been-there-done-that" crowd, I just felt there was all the time in the world to do it. Now I'm nearly 42, with health issues, and the weight loss really is 10 times more difficult. I guess I just thought I had a lot more time, until sudenly there was more time behind me than in front of me (I definitely won't live to 84 if I don't get this weight off).

That being said, if you're miserable, you have to find a way not to be miserable any more. No one puts up with miserable forever. That is a lesson I wish I had learned young. I was always wanting to get the weight off as fast as I could, so I always seemed to try drastic (and miserable) ways to do it. Instead, think in terms of small, doable, enjoyable steps. Do things you enjoy or at least don't mind that help you reach your goal. It may seem like the slower way, but it really isn't, because you'll be less likely to give up.

If you tend to forget your "goal" put it where you will see it every day. I printed small posters up and put them in nearly every room (not the bathroom, because I thought guests would be creeped out by a "you can do it," sign in the bathroom. The one on the fridge says "Make every choice count".

This stuff is very hard work. It may be the most difficul thing you ever do, because in many cases it feels like an uphill battle, and it may be one that you fight your entire life. Still, only you can say whether it is worth it, so sit down and make a "pros and cons" list. Write down why you want to give up, and why you want to reach your goal. You'll have your answer.