LA Weight Loss - The Beck Diet Solution – January 2008 – Group for Support, Discussion, Diet Coach




BillBlueEyes
01-01-2008, 01:43 AM
Welcome to The Beck DIET solution discussion group, support group, diet coach group concerning the book by Dr. Judith S. Beck:
The Beck DIET solution: train your brain to think like a thin person.

The Beck Diet Solution is a psychological program, not a food plan. It provides a step-by-step program to learn specific techniques to stay on our diet, lose weight, and maintain our weight loss for life. The program is based on Dr. Beck's clinical research in Cognitive Behavior Therapy (CBT).

There are no eating plans, calorie counts, recipes or exercises; according to Beck, any healthy diet will work if we learn to think differently about eating and food. Beck's book is like an extended therapy session with a diet coach.

This is a place to discuss our daily efforts and, for some of us, serves as an on-line diet coach.

If you’ve arrived from a search engine, you’ve landed at the site of 3 fat chicks, a remarkable place for those interested in a healthy life style, including mindful eating, exercise, and weight loss. More about the site, including how to register so that you can post can be found here (http://www.3fatchicks.com).

The book, The Beck Diet Solution, is available on Amazon through the 3FC store by clicking here. (http://astore.amazon.com/3fatchionadie/detail/0848731735/104-4216363-1799918)

Previous Beck threads on 3fatchicks.com:

The Beck Diet Solution – December 2007 – Group for Support, Discussion, Diet Coach (http://www.3fatchicks.com/forum/showthread.php?t=128075)
November 2007 The Beck Diet Solution (http://www.3fatchicks.com/forum/showthread.php?t=126374)
October 2007 The Beck Diet Solution (http://www.3fatchicks.com/forum/showthread.php?t=124433)
September 2007 The Beck Diet Solution (http://www.3fatchicks.com/forum/showthread.php?t=121790)
The Beck Diet Solution August 2007 (http://www.3fatchicks.com/forum/showthread.php?t=119430)
The Beck Diet Solution July 2007 (http://www.3fatchicks.com/forum/showthread.php?t=116556)
The Beck Diet Solution - support group? [ May/June 2007] (http://www.3fatchicks.com/forum/showthread.php?t=112274)


BillBlueEyes
01-01-2008, 09:06 AM
Met CoastalSue’s challenge; CREDIT moi. For my New Year Eve party I was facing an evening being offered VERY good finger food arranged to encourage nibbling as well as a cheerful, assertive hostess working the crowd with a different platter of luscious something every half hour or so. I had visions of continuous grazing with only a vague notion of trying to limit it. Then this happened: BillBlueEyes Here is the challenge. Tonight -I will not eat one thing which I do not put on my plate or napkin first to catch my breath before eating and let me know if you do the same.On my way out the door. This will be difficult, as this party specializes in grab-n-go platters. Howsomever, Challenge accepted. I'll report back.My attitude was changed on the spot. At the party, I happily drank a cranberry sparking water for the first hour busily chatting while observing the food and devising my plate. Then I filled a single 6” plate of the most choice offerings, sat down and thoroughly enjoyed every treat. I was satisfied. I ignored the food for the rest of the evening feeling that I had had a most delightful mini-meal instead of feeling like I had suffered to refrain from eating all night. To me, it feels like a miraculous difference – just the kind of difference I’m trying to find. (Just have to figure out how to keep CoastalSue in a jar to push me before each party situation.) I hate to sound like a proselytizer, but that is Beck’s strategies working.

Sue (CoastalSue) – You done egged me on to do good. Thank you.

MaryBlu – Like the others, I’m excited about beginning at the beginning.

SuchAtwin – Was just happily pondering on your thought, ” I am trying to be my new best friend”.

Ann (Newlifestyle) – You suggested to CoastalSue that she plan for her New Year’s Eve party. She responded to you, then turned around and challenged me. And that changed my party experience, making you my "gran diet coach" for the evening, as it were. So, thanks for getting me on track. Oh, and because of you I went and found an empty chair to sit down and eat mindfully for a few minutes amidst the general engorging surrounding me. I just followed the suggestions of my gran diet coach, “that is my excuse and I am sticking to it.”

Cammie (CammieCam) – ”Bonne Année” back to you.

Heidi (hbuchwald) – Waving as she shushes past.

Tam (tammay) – Thank you for your remarkable demonstration of recognizing out of plan eating, asking questions to alter your mind set, and then taking a positive step to get back on plan. What a fine example of what we’re trying to learn here. Kudos to you.

Readers – May you loose your resolve on your resolutions. 

__________________
XXXXXXX 7 XXXXXXX 14 XXXXXXX 21 XXXXXXX 28 XXXXXXX 35 XXXXXXX 42
Completed Beck Program-day 42. You’ve Met your goal. Congratulations!

coastalsue
01-01-2008, 01:07 PM
Happy New Years Everyone

Well, I went to the party with the best of intentions for using a napkin or plate and not eat one thing directly from the serving plate.eeekkkk there were no napkins nor plates any where but tons of yummy finger food-I was busted in our challenge. I did do a great job drinking water during the evening with the glass of bubbly for New Year. thanks to you Ann for planting that idea in my brain.

Credit to you Bill!! glad you enjoy the food while (Sob, Sob) beating me in the challenge.

More later-We have over night company and breakfast to make-I got a kick out of the challenge but was shocked I could not particpate-who knows maybe next party I'll even bring a small napkin for me to use and focus on eating less finger foods-ummm Have to think about that one.

sue


maryblu
01-01-2008, 05:08 PM
Here's to it, and the collective wisdom of us all. Our collective approach is working its magic already!

Happy New Year, all..the dear ones who have been posting regularly and all who may reading along.

Collectively, we decided that we would review The Beck Diet Solution together, taking two program-days each week. I agreed to lead the first week, and know that someone will offer to lead next week. Regardless of where we are in the book, or the plan, it is probably obvious to us all by now that there is so much to be gained by our discussions.

Since we have a whole week to do the first two days, I have been giving some thought to the introduction pages. I reread them twice because there is so much wisdom there...wisdom and hope. The first time I read Beck, I was struck with the the hope, the certainty that the weight loss (and sustaining it) is not only doable, but there is a certain pathway to acheiving it.

"You'll get to the point where you react differently when you see food you know you shouldn't eat." Beck, pg. 24.

"My attitude was changed on the spot. At the party, I happily drank a cranberry sparking water for the first hour busily chatting while observing the food and devising my plate. Then I filled a single 6” plate of the most choice offerings, sat down and thoroughly enjoyed every treat. I was satisfied. I ignored the food for the rest of the evening feeling that I had had a most delightful mini-meal instead of feeling like I had suffered to refrain from eating all night. To me, it feels like a miraculous difference – just the kind of difference I’m trying to find. (Just have to figure out how to keep CoastalSue in a jar to push me before each party situation.) I hate to sound like a proselytizer, but that is Beck’s strategies working." BillBlueEyes, Jan. 1, 2008. Wow.

Another "aha" moment the first time through occurred when I realized I had spent a good deal of my adult life being a little resentful of people who are thin and can apparently eat whatever they want. That is a really shameful thing to have to admit; imagine how startling it was to realize it.

And then.......to have to realize that they really probably can't eat whatever they want. I love the way Beck phrases the truth of it: "Most thin people, especially women, stay thin by being incredibly careful about what they eat. The might tell you that they don't work at it, but mostly, they do."

I have admitted to you in the past that I am rebellious. That means for one thing I have a terrible time with compliance. The only thing I can say I have been 100% compliant with is taking all of my antibiotic meds so I didn't get strep back.

Last time, I read Beck, got it, agreed with it, but then...the sabotaging thoughts and behaviors. Yanno, its not like this is so tough...the steps are all reasonable and doable...and REQUIRIED.. so, I am already smiling about what I will be writing on my Advantage Response Cards. I hope we will all feel comfortable sharing some of the "deeper" ones...the ones that require more thought and analysis. If so, great; if not, I hope what is shared is helpful.

I had a mentor in my past life who said, "there is only one way to search for a job, and that's frantically." It seems that conquering my wt. problem once and for all rates a similar effort. I really do want to think differently about food. I don't want to be so attracted by its signal. I want to get to the point where I react differently to food I know I shouldn't eat. I want it to be automatic. I do know that will require effort, but what a reward!

Happy posting all; I am so looking forward to our discussions.

SuchAtwin
01-01-2008, 11:34 PM
Wow, Maryblu, thank-you for the very thoughtful in-depth review! I too would like my thoughts to be automatic. To achieve we have to believe! It is great to start 2008 with a positive affirmation."You'll get to the point where you react differently when you see food you know you shouldn't eat." Beck, pg. 24.
Sue: with or without a napkin or plate, it sounds like you behaved like a winner to me.
Bill: love your pithyness:"May you loose your resolve on your resolutions. "

SuchAtwin
01-01-2008, 11:36 PM
or is it pithiness

hbuchwald
01-02-2008, 12:15 AM
Hi there friends,
I am now officially back from my ski trip. We had a FABULOUS trip-full of family fun, activity and me handling food really well overall given the circumstances. Today I was in the car for a bit over 8 hrs getting home and succumbed to the calling of the white cheddar popcorn and a reese's pbutter cup. It is behind me now... onward and forward.

I am so happy to be back home and that it is a new year and that we are rereading the book.

Maryblu-what a great beginning to our discussions. Thank you for taking the time to read, reread and share with us. My reasons for losing weight list is long. The one umbrella that all of my reasons can fall under is "I want to live as long as I can to fully develop myself and watch my daughter grow up." I have really been working on myself this last year and know that the philosophy behind BDS works for me since I have made changes in other areas of my life. I too want to get to that point where the thinking is automatic.

Billblueeyes: SO impressive that you took that challenge from Coastalsue and really made it work for yourself at that party.

Sue-these things happen... all of these situations teach us something and help us for similar situations in the future. Your interaction with Bill demonstrates the power of this list and the importance in sharing with each other... credit tu! :)

Off to slug some water down and hit the hay early. What is it about sitting on my arse all day in a car that makes me TIRED???? :)

Til tomorrow, Heidi

BillBlueEyes
01-02-2008, 06:31 AM
Was good to have a quiet day, just working on a refrigerator full of leftovers. Got the Christmas tree down and to the curb. Spent some quiet time reading Winter World that describes the inventive ways that animals survive the cold and scarcity of food.

MaryBlu - Thanks for getting us started and for going back over the introductory material. I take encouragement from Beck's little snipe, "... but mostly, they do." It reminds me that rational eating will get less difficult, but it will always require my attention. Rereading also reminds me that I am quite able to "...fool yourself about how much you eat." If I eat straight from a container while standing, it doesn't count. Just WOW at the power of denial.

Sue (CoastalSue) - Oh Well. I remain grateful for the challenge and share your expectations that you'll figure out a way next time. [ Visualizing Sue arriving at a party with her own napkin, plate, silverware, and chair - just in case]

SuchAtwin - I appreciate being drawn back to Beck's affirmation: "You'll get to the point where you react differently when you see food you know you shouldn't eat."

Cammie (CammieCam) - Don't forget to come home someday, LOL.

Heidi (hbuchwald) - Welcome back. LOL, after 5 hours driving, I long to go to bed I'm so tired. Doesn't make any sense to me either.

Readers - Beck reminds us that "thin people" don't feel helpless and hopeless when they gain weight; they simply watch what they eat for the next few days.

__________________
XXXXXXX 7 XXXXXXX 14 XXXXXXX 21 XXXXXXX 28 XXXXXXX 35 XXXXXXX 42
Completed Beck Program-day 42. You’ve Met your goal. Congratulations!

capernan
01-02-2008, 09:13 AM
I'm not sure if I am posting this in the right place, but I just got the Beck Diet Solution book and am looking for a coach. I'm feeling pretty pumped about this plan as I really believe that CBT works. Here's a bit about me, so you can decide if you want to be my coach:

I am 41 yrs old, happily married and am the very lucky Mom to a 6 year old girl. I currently weight 215 lbs and my long term goal is to weigh 150 lbs (that would move my BMI from obese through overweight to healthy weight). I work full time at a women's shelter. I live in small town Nova Scotia, Canada.

Looking forward to working this program and getting to know you all. Thanks,
Nancy
who just realized that I need to update my signiture.

Newlifestyle
01-02-2008, 06:34 PM
Hello everyone.

Welcome Nancy, I do hope you enjoy this group as much as I do.

Maryblu, thank you for starting us off, I am going to respond, when I read your post, I wanted to go back and re-re-read the first part.

Bill, way to go at the party....yeah you.

Heidi, I too feel worn out when I drive in a car. I get so tired.

Sue, let us all do great in 2008. This is going to be our year.

Cammie, how are you doing? I hope you have an awesome time.

SuchATwin, I hope you had an awesome day.

Hello to everyone and I do hope you all had a great day. I feel like I am still so busy.

Have a great day everyone.
Ann

coastalsue
01-02-2008, 06:36 PM
Welcome to 2008,

The last 3 vistors have pulled out of our drive way with absolutely no plans for more gatherings in the near future. Now Northern Cal is expected to be hard hit with a series of 3 storms-projecting power outages. One time we went 5 days without power-that was long!! I want things to quiet down but not that quiet. If I don't post for some days that will be why.

Maryblue-Thanks for the thoughts-Even on my advantage card I only focus on how I want my body and energy level to be -but never thought about include a goal of changing my attitude to eating. Then the quote about frantically job hunting effort- I find it very hard to continously maintain the level of focus needed to change old eating habits. Pondering on a reason for my listof reasons to lose weight which deals with changing/freeing my self from the attitude that I must have these periodic unhealthy overindulgence. I have successfully dealt with some very difficulty things in my life, but why do I have a childlike hope that changing food habits should be "easier"? I "must" take these periodic overeating breaks while losing weight. Underneath food still have a role of reward-the battle of logical mind adult versus emotional kid. I really want to be a logical adult who can have alot fun without volumns food.

Capernan-Big Welcome!! this is the best spot because there is a group of coaches-like the old saying no one of us is smarter than all of together! I certainly respect you line of work and how stressful it can become. Beck has a well writen book-every thing makes sense but it is that day to day practice which we can use help with-this is the spot.

Welcome back home Heidi- It always great when family trip turn out so well. It is hard not eat in the car during long trip especially with young children who need snacks so often.

BillBlueEyes-glad you like a challenge-me too. I love cards, games and good natured competition-Even more important is that when making a game out of what is a struggle, it changes attitude. Even now I'll remember to use a napkin/plate in future gathering-with a smile. Got to make the long check list of to-dos fun.

SuchATwin-thanks for the support-Hope things are going well for you and your famiy.

Howdy Ann-hope you get unbusy soon.

During these storms may there be- power to the people!

sue

maryblu
01-02-2008, 09:24 PM
Greetings, all, and welcome to day 2 of our discussions about the Beck Diet Solution.

Welcome, Nancy (capernan). I am not sure how many of us here actually have a Beck diet coach in person, and it remains to be seen how effective our collective coaching will be, but you will find support here, a "reality check" if needed, a "challenge" or two, and a lot of humor. It does feel great to me that all of us are focused and fired up. (I suspect BillBE was getting a little tired carrying us all! :))

If we are following Beck from Day I, our assignments are to do our Advantage Cards (day 1) and to choose a diet plan and a backup plan (day 2). We are encouraged not to start "dieting" until day 15, but rather to get ready. The old me would have just started in dieting, but this time, I am enjoying not dieting. I am being very mindful of what I eat, and have made really great choices. Imagine that.

I do think that Beck intends us to get very specific and deep about recording our Advantage Cards with a lot of thought. Those of us who are overweight think about it everyday. We wish to be thin. We wait to be thin--"I am NOT buying ANY clothes until I lose 20#s (pick a #)." Then we brush that aside. It is a negative thought, or a passive thought; it bugs us, but it doesn't cause us to act. Imagine the power of a well-thought -out -specifc list of positive outcomes from getting and staying at a healthy weight.

"My reasons for losing weight list is long. The one umbrella that all of my reasons can fall under is "I want to live as long as I can to fully develop myself and watch my daughter grow up." I have really been working on myself this last year and know that the philosophy behind BDS works for me since I have made changes in other areas of my life. I too want to get to that point where the thinking is automatic"
Heidi (hbuckwald)

It has struck me many times that if we learn this discipline and embrace it, we will be much more effective in other aspects of our lives as well. I don't know how many years of calendars I have for Franklin Covey; I KNOW they work; I just don't use them. Most of us are pretty sure Beck will work, right? We have seen BillBE eyes using the program, working it, and it working for him....right? hmmmmmm......hmmmmmmmm

hbuchwald
01-03-2008, 12:16 AM
Hello friends,
Capernan: I did have a diet coach identified and willing to work with me. We talked on the phone since we live about an hour away from each other. This is so much better for me since everyone here understands the deal and I can post/read whenever I want to or need to. I continue to look at different people in my life and think, "could this person be a good coach for me?"... yes, time will ultimately tell but for now, this group and one on another site are doing it for me.

Coastalsue: I really hope that your power doesn't go out! We lose our power here in my part of WA state periodically too. I have been lucky that it has never been more than 3 days (knock on wood) for us. It is really hard to live like that!

Billblueeyes: That book sounds interesting! I go back to work tomorrow...I never look forward to it but it is always good when I am there. I am a teacher, which is a job I really enjoy, but just love being home with my daughter too.

Maryblu: Great work on keeping us focused on the days in the book. And kudos for really following that "don't diet until day 15" part. That is difficult! Since I am rereading, I am still eating according to my "plan" but taking in all that has not been absorbed (from the book not from extra food..hahahaa). Portion control and TRULY paying attention to hunger and being "comfortable" are my focii. I am gearing up to buy that "Mindless Eating" book. Funny how I referred to it as "Mindful" when it is "mindless"... was I being very "mindful" when I wrote that? :)

Off to read and then hit the hay.

Til tomorrow, Heidi

BillBlueEyes
01-03-2008, 05:05 AM
:welcome: Nancy (Capernan) :welcome:

This is certainly the right place for someone who is attacking The Beck Diet Solution! As you can see, we're just starting to discuss the book from the beginning, so it's a perfect time to join.

Some of us informally use this forum as a group diet coach. We've never tried to describe exactly what that means that we're expected to give and to receive here. But, as you can tell by reading the Beck threads to date, it generally means supportive listening, giving feedback on what we've heard, and making suggestions that move each other toward the Beck strategies.

Please step boldly into the fray and by your postings help us to figure out how to be a productive group diet coach.

__________________
XXXXXXX 7 XXXXXXX 14 XXXXXXX 21 XXXXXXX 28 XXXXXXX 35 XXXXXXX 42
Completed Beck Program-day 42. You’ve Met your goal. Congratulations!

BillBlueEyes
01-03-2008, 06:51 AM
It's the time to motivate myself to walk in bitter cold with ice everywhere, or to learn to love the treadmill in the gym. I use the local Bally's, which I really like, so I was a bit miffed when the Feb 08 Consumer Reports just rated gyms in the USA and Bally's came in dead last. Perhaps nationally, I wouldn't know, but not the specific Bally's location that I use. Oh Well.

My Advantages Card has 20 entries that I've refined over three months. The first is:Healthy life style empowers personal and spiritual growth - "I am being responsible."Remaining responsible for myself allows me to be available to confront other issues and opportunities in my life. Each unsolved problem that I carry dulls my ability to be responsible in all areas of my life. Knowing that I was living an unhealthy lifestyle was costing me more than just the health issues.


Sue (CoastalSue) - Like your notion of changing a struggle into a smile. Crossing my fingers for your electricity.

MaryBlu - Kudos for getting us going here. You capture well the millstone of carrying weight: Those of us who are overweight think about it everyday. ... it bugs us, but it doesn't cause us to act. For me not acting on weight seeps over to not acting on other aspects of my life.

tofulover – Come back and start at the beginning with us.

Ann (Newlifestyle) - Glad that you're keeping this Beck thread on your list even while you're so busy.

Cammie (CammieCam) - Have you returned?

Heidi (hbuchwald) - Do you have a definition of what a Diet Coach does?

Nancy (capernan) - Notice that you wrote:"I'm feeling pretty pumped about this plan as I really believe that CBT works." Were you already a believer in CBT before reading Beck? Do you use it in your counseling?

SuchAtwin - Just pondering your thought: "To achieve we have to believe!"

Readers - "They [thin people] feel no compulsion to empty their plates." Beck, pg 35.

__________________
XXXXXXX 7 XXXXXXX 14 XXXXXXX 21 XXXXXXX 28 XXXXXXX 35 XXXXXXX 42
Completed Beck Program-day 42. You’ve Met your goal. Congratulations!

coastalsue
01-03-2008, 01:13 PM
Dear Beck Buddies,

Some powerful musings on the role of overeating and the role of personal responsiblity in all area of a healthy life-both spiritual and physically. For me the most difficulty part of Beck is that while doing the to-do list I did not change my core attitudes toward food-I have given food emotional powers to comfort, dull and reward. This power results in my yo-yo maintence of the food plan.

I wish to release the power of food versus my old approach which is to be periodically dieting/eating healthy with a sense of rigid control? While I have made some excellent healthy changes, I have a level of tension doing the numerous Beck steps which often increases with time that I finally deal with it by have by a food binge with company. Any help on releasing this food attitude/tension? Ann I am pondering you ideas of adding some planned treats to my menu. How do folks make sure treats don't become triggers-my big fear?

After reading Maryblu posting, I just starting thinking about the power of my attitude to food, and then you BillBlueEyes post your number one reason on your advantage card-about personal and spiritual growth. I know food is my favorite coping method for dealing with unmet or hidden needs. I guess I have the sabatoging thought when tense enough that-"But eating this right now will make me happy and poor me I deserve this bit of happiness and I will eat better tomarrow" Any ideas on this crazy thought?

Anyway thanks for letting me babble on-I have gotten back to weighing, preplanning, and recording and staying with a healthy amount of cals. but I do so worry about the next binge.

sue

avvocata
01-03-2008, 05:27 PM
I'm just beginning the diet phase of Beck, and haven't been able to find a "diet coach" who really understands cbt. The members here look amazing - there's a whole lot of introspection and thoughtfulness. Here's hoping you all can shoulder yet one more beginner!

BillBlueEyes
01-03-2008, 06:58 PM
:welcome: to the Beck discussion thread, avvocata, and :welcome: to 3FC

We're all relatively beginners here - since the book has only been out since May 2007 - and we're looking for different perspectives. Please join right in the current discussion, even though you've already passed this point.

P.S. Neat avatar.

__________________
XXXXXXX 7 XXXXXXX 14 XXXXXXX 21 XXXXXXX 28 XXXXXXX 35 XXXXXXX 42
Completed Beck Program-day 42. You’ve Met your goal. Congratulations!

Newlifestyle
01-03-2008, 08:28 PM
Hello everyone,
I hope each of you had success in your day, no let me reword that, I hope each of you realize you do have success in your day.
Welcome avvocata.
One main thing I am more aware of is that we need to be aware of the sabotaging thoughts, it is so easy for negative thoughts to sneak into our minds, but all the positives we don't focus on, or at least I don't. Note to self, work on this....
Sue, I have found that I plan foods into my day. For example if I want to have two cookies, I will count the points/calories for them and since that is all that is in my bag that is all I get. When I measure out a portion I do much better than if I say, I will take out say one handful and leave the bag on the counter. I have friends who eliminated treats all together for 21 days and then they re-introduced them, once a week. For me, I pack a bag each day, it has my fruits, vegetables, treats, in it. If I want something else I exchange what is in my bag. It works really easy now, at the beginning it was diffiuclt.
I know when Beck is evaluating your diet plan, it does ask if I can live with this plan for the long term. I know for me that is key for me as if I restrict myself completely I feel deprived and then think, once I reach my goal weight I can eat a, b and c and then I think I would just gain it back.
My advantage cards are: I will be healthier,
I'll be able to keep us with my DS,
I will feel better physically,
and I'll be more comfortable eating infront of others.

I don't like that this book makes me think. This is uncomfortable for me. I think I prefer to go through the motion..... My response is just do it anyway....

Have a wonderful night everyone.

be good to yourselves.

Ann

Newlifestyle
01-03-2008, 08:32 PM
Sue, You wrote this

Some powerful musings on the role of overeating and the role of personal responsiblity in all area of a healthy life-both spiritual and physically. For me the most difficulty part of Beck is that while doing the to-do list I did not change my core attitudes toward food-I have given food emotional powers to comfort, dull and reward. This power results in my yo-yo maintence of the food plan.
This reminds me that people often let their money control them rather than controlling their money.....wow this is a big one for me, why am I letting food control me? I should be controlling my food. Somehow I learned to give control away. I am not sure if this makes sense. It is an Aha moment for me.
Thanks Sue,

maryblu
01-03-2008, 09:14 PM
Wow! This is really getting exciting. I am just fired up to get on the thread and read all the insight you all have been so willing to share. Being this open is hard. Credit ALL!

We are growing in #s and that is great, too...more collective wisdom, experiences, problem solving.

BillBlueEyes...wow. such incredible eloquence......and so powerful.
"Remaining responsible for myself allows me to be available to confront other issues and opportunities in my life. Each unsolved problem that I carry dulls my ability to be responsible in all areas of my life. Knowing that I was living an unhealthy lifestyle was costing me more than just the health issues."


That is exactly what I was trying to say yesterday! You voiced it perfectly. And great credit to you for an Advantage Response so well thought out..I think Beck would be delighted!

CoastalSue, and all who have posted about the power food has to hold us, hold our attention, it is puzzling, isn't it? But so, well......powerful

I would like to put this out there for all and see what you think. The thing I like best about CBT and particularly Beck's step by step, detailed, methodical approach is simply that. I love a mechanical, routine, step-by-step action plan. Beck does lay it out for us and does assure us that it becomes routine.

Everytime we follow the plan, practice in advance our helpful responses, exercise our "resistance muscle", it becomes more routine and more the way we behave. We don't have to worry about our behavior tomorrow; what counts is our behavior each time we have to respond to whatever food stimulus we are confronting. We just have to have our plan ready, our responses and strategies in place. Just this moment is what counts.

Pretty soon we begin to think of ourselves as "in control". It is kinda the old wisdom, behave "as if". If you are sad and want to cheer up, behave as if you are happy.

I am happy we haven't moved onto day 2 yet and the diet discussion. There is alot of meat here to discuss first....ahhh.....sic.....cheap shot, I know.

Need to read my Advantage cards!

hbuchwald
01-04-2008, 02:32 AM
Hello friends,
This is such a wonderful group-I really appreciate reading other's thoughts and experiences and being able to share my own.

BillBlueEyes: I think that I was tired when I wrote my bit about my diet coach last night-that diet coach/friend started to have some personal crises and just couldn't make time for our weekly phone call. I began looking for another coach and found this group! I have not defined exactly what a coach does but love this group and another one that I am a part of because 1. they are groups of people who understand the Beck philosophy and can therefore help me problem solve and I can learn from issues that they deal with in ways that I may want to use since we have BDS in common 2. it is here 24/7 -I was having a hard time thinking that one person could be as available for this as I was interpreting in the book that they needed to be... I also have a hard time asking someone to sacrifice a lot for me (in this case, time to listen to my progress and issues).

Coastalsue: My sabotaging thoughts tend to run in the "I deserve this" category frequently as well. I also REALLY want to overcome that feeling of going on "autopilot" that I get myself into when I lose weight. I am REALLY trusting BDS to help me change my thoughts about food-you have articulated what I am feeling so well about this-this is for the long haul. Beck would probably say that we could counteract that type of thinking with "I deserve to take really great care of my body" or "I deserve to be happy but eating this xyz will only make me happy temporarily and I will surely regret eating it later"...

maryblu: I believe that you are right about us behaving our way into changing. My problem in the past has been that I do that but then get tired of the "behaving" (exercise, being hungry, etc...) and slowly slack off and gradually get used to the new levels (or lack of) of effort to stay healthy. I really think that, in this case, the power for me with this program is addressing my sabotaging thoughts. It has been very difficult for me to identify what I am thinking when eating something I don't really want to eat.

You are all so inspiring. I also love your ARC Billblueeyes....

Goodnight friends....kudos to me-I have now lost 10% of my starting weight!

BillBlueEyes
01-04-2008, 06:50 AM
Another item on my Advantage Response Card:Weight distorts all other medical advice (e.g “But you should lose weight first.”)Whatever issue I brought to a doctor (other than a wart, LOL) losing weight seemed to influence the discussion. Was never really sure that my issue was fully probed since weight was a plausible cause that relieved the tension of uncertainty.


Sue (CoastalSue) - With this thought, "I have given food emotional powers to comfort, dull and reward.", you're reminding me that a goal is to reduce a donut to just being a donut. If I can demystify food, then i can create space in my head to see what I am about to do, then can think, and then can employ a Beck strategy.

MaryBlu - Good thought for me: "It is kinda the old wisdom, behave "as if". " The trick for me to convert that thought into doing the Beck strategies is to remember to ask myself if I have an alternative to the harmful behavior that I'm about to do. I am better at this when I spot situations in advance, like mentally preparing myself before going to a restaurant. I have to give up the belief that I shouldn't have to do any work to make this happen.

Ann (Newlifestyle) - You raise the notion that by working on giving ourselves credit we will increase our ability to spot the negative Sabotaging Thoughts. What a good incentive to confront the Sabotaging Thoughts about giving myself credit. CREDIT moi for being able to hear that. Your Advantage, "I will feel better physically" reminds me that I hadn't expected to feel better ALL THE TIME after losing weight, but I do.

Heidi (hbuchwald) - Kudos to you for losing 10% of your body weight. I tend to also have this problem: "It has been very difficult for me to identify what I am thinking when eating something I don't really want to eat." For me, it's a new notion to even question what I was thinking. Lots of room for my growth here.

Readers - "Just as the decision to eat can reduce tension, the decision not to eat can reduce tension." Beck, pg 31.

__________________
XXXXXXX 7 XXXXXXX 14 XXXXXXX 21 XXXXXXX 28 XXXXXXX 35 XXXXXXX 42
Completed Beck Program-day 42. You’ve Met your goal. Congratulations!

CammieCam
01-04-2008, 09:58 PM
Hello everyone and Happy New Year!

Wow, you guys are moving right along here! So much to catch up on.

I returned last night. It was an amazing trip, I had a wonderful time! Paris was COLD, but beautiful. I'm still trying to figure out how those Parisian women stay so slim when they barely cook and eat out all the time!

I did indulge in the food, perhaps a bit much, but it was worth it I think. I didn't have a bad meal while I was there.

The sights were breathtaking as well, I was just so excited to be there! So many monuments and museums and churches; the Eiffel Tower, the Lourve Notre Dame, just amazing. I took over 500 pictures in 6 days!

Anyhoo, I am going to my WW meeting tomorrow morning, checking out the damage and starting new for the new year. I'm tired and trying to rest my body from the jet lag, so I'll do my best to catch up on all the posts this weekend and see what you guys have been up to. :)

maryblu
01-04-2008, 11:34 PM
Dear All,

Worried about CoastSue.......the storm news sounds dreadful. We are all holding a good thought, and we will be soooooo happy when you check in with us to say all is over and OK.

Welcome home, CammieCam. What is the name of that book? The French Paradox?? Is that it? The fact that the French eat fatty foods, drink wine, and are much thinner than Americans? I didn't read it, but the summaries concluded that smaller portions, slow eating, much walking pretty much did the trick. Yes?

BillBE..again thanks for being able to say exactly, so clearly, the pure kernel of the issue: "The trick for me to convert that thought into doing the Beck strategies is to remember to ask myself if I have an alternative to the harmful behavior that I'm about to do. I am better at this when I spot situations in advance, like mentally preparing myself before going to a restaurant. I have to give up the belief that I shouldn't have to do any work to make this
happen."

That is sooo why I love the routine......just do it......just plan ahead.......have your response cards......do it so automatically...

If we are a healthcare practioner, there is a routine, there is a standard practice, there is something we do, as a matter of course, automatically. That is what happens with Beck......we do it, with prompts, practice, do... until it is automatic......BillBE would say it is getting more automatic, I do think!

I have had a few interesting days, getting hungry again.....it feels good...it has been awhile! ...more on that later......that lesson is later.......lol


Our Advantage Response Cards....

"I want my clothes to hang on me again". That is more thought out than it sounds, because it comes with the memory of how that felt..without the clothes getting caught up on a lump or a bump......I can feel it.


"Another item on my Advantage Response Card:
Weight distorts all other medical advice (e.g “But you should lose weight first.”)

Whatever issue I brought to a doctor (other than a wart, LOL) losing weight seemed to influence the discussion. Was never really sure that my issue was fully probed since weight was a plausible cause that relieved the tension of uncertainty."
BillBlueEyes


Kudos, BillBE, for another well thought out Advantage Response. It is also so true!

How about this one?

Being a normal weight takes that issue/reason/factor out of every life equation...being over weight is no longer a factor in relationships, job performance and rewards, electability..lol......sic......whatever, pick a catergory..or add to it! It no longer is the overwhelming elephant in the room.

Enjoy thinking about a LONG list of advantages to losing the weight for good, all my Beck friends.

Some of us just starting out are thinking about our primary diet plan and a back up plan....and are looking forward to next week and the next two lessons.......or we are forging on where ever we are in the BDS

moxiesd
01-05-2008, 12:06 AM
Hello Group

I am new to this thread. Your Beck plan seems to offer some hope, where the last diet book that I read offered dismal failure. Unfortunately holding it in the back of my mind gave me permission to throw the diet out and unfortunately over the holiday months (Oct _ Dec) I managed to regain a lot of weight....with out any effort at all. LOL

I too resented thin people who don't seem to have any trouble keeping their weight in normal perspective. While "thin" people may make decisions regarding their eating habits, I still don't think they have the same problems that fat people have. I find that stress is my brains signal to eat. Thin people seem to be unable to eat when stressed or emotional. I finally realized that the first thing I need to address when my brain is yelling at me to eat (inappropritely) is to ask myself what am I stressing about???? Amazingly I am able to put my finger on it.....usually I ask myself how eating will solve this stess problem........usually that takes care of the "eat signal".

Please forgive my ramblings...I don't have the book, but based on what I have read here, I will probably get it fairly soon.....I ordered from Amazon once before and it took me over a month to get the book.:(

I have had another brain adjustment in the diet department, and I am wondering if it is a fly by or if it will last. Right now I have noticed that as a result of the last cycle of regaining which naturally included a lot of binging, I now feel better feeling "in control" when I am dieting. Where as previously I just felt deprived. Now I don't feel deprived, I feel more like I am in control because of the "diet program" I am following. Somehow, it just feels better to be "on program". (does Beck have a comment on this?)

Anyway, I am glad I found this group, and find your inputs fascinating.

BillBlueEyes
01-05-2008, 07:32 AM
:welcome: to the Beck thread, moxiesd, :welcome:

What a great job of condensing The Beck Diet Solution into one sentence: Amazingly I am able to put my finger on it.....usually I ask myself how eating will solve this stess problem........usually that takes care of the "eat signal".

Do get the book; our snippets here convey the concepts but the power is achieved by working the to-do lists and writing our responses to the exercises of each Program-day. Some people use only the book, some only the workbook, some swear by using both. My Amazon experience has always been less than a week delivery - two days since I've started using their two day service. You might have hit a glitch, it's worth trying again.

P.S. Like you name; is moxie a commonly understood word in your part of the world?

__________________
XXXXXXX 7 XXXXXXX 14 XXXXXXX 21 XXXXXXX 28 XXXXXXX 35 XXXXXXX 42
Completed Beck Program-day 42. You’ve Met your goal. Congratulations!

BillBlueEyes
01-05-2008, 08:38 AM
Another item on my Advantages Response Card:Buy clothes that fit. Be proud of clothes and select ones I like. OK, I have that guy-thing indifference to clothes, except that I DO notice when I LIKE the clothes I'm wearing. When I have a negative image of my body, I buy stuff on sale that doesn't fit, that I'd never wear, that doesn't feel good to me. And, biggest thing, I lose the connection that I can change that.


MaryBlu - You capture, in one choice word, the feeling that I was chasing above with: "I want my clothes to hang on me again." Ouch!

And you again capture another big feeling with the "overwhelming elephant in the room". I think you're really on to chasing down the way that weight seeps into all aspects of our life.


Sue (CoastalSue) - Hope you're OK Sue. Ominous news reports from California: "600,000 in the dark ... as much as 10 feet of snow for the Sierra Nevada."

Cammie (CammieCam) - Welcome home!!! Can't wait to hear your stories from Paris.

moxiesd - You wrote: "I now feel better feeling "in control" when I am dieting. Where as previously I just felt deprived. ... (does Beck have a comment on this?)" The first chapters and the first Program-days speak a lot about avoiding being deprived. One quote is: Once I accept the fact that I have to follow a healthy eating plan for life, dieting will be easier. To my ears, your phrase "feel better" is stronger, more encouraging than Beck's phrase "easier."


Readers - "Eating is not automatic. You can learn how to take control." Beck, pg 32.

__________________
XXXXXXX 7 XXXXXXX 14 XXXXXXX 21 XXXXXXX 28 XXXXXXX 35 XXXXXXX 42
Completed Beck Program-day 42. You’ve met your goal. Congratulations!

maryblu
01-05-2008, 12:58 PM
Dear All,

To say that patience is not my strong suit would be a laughable understatement. No matter how much I watch CNN or monitor things online, I have to accept the fact that we won't get news of CoastalSue until she checks in. Thoughts are with you, friend Sue. Maybe a little Beck wisdom is transposing itself into other areas of my life, hmmmm? We can only hope; I know some of my family would appreciate a little more patience in the house!

I am amazed, but shouldn't be surprised, that the Beck wisdom is just really adapting and learning from past experience (mistakes AND successes). This is so well stated..and btw......welcome...moxieds...wow! You are so READY for Beck..."Right now I have noticed that as a result of the last cycle of regaining which naturally included a lot of binging, I now feel better feeling "in control" when I am dieting. Where as previously I just felt deprived. Now I don't feel deprived, I feel more like I am in control because of the "diet program" I am following. Somehow, it just feels better to be "on program". (does Beck have a comment on this?)" moxiesd

For me, the "control" comes from the step-by-step, routine, very scripted methodology of Beck..it really lays it out for you, step by step, and then even has you plan for the unexpected, the possible trouble you may encounter.

As I am watching the storms on CNN, I am thinking of how effectively Walmart tracks what people need to buy for hurricanes...and they stock it...have it ready for purchase. Effective retail success and for a profit to be sure, but FEMA should take note, and we can all take note, and have a plan in place! We, too, will profit.

I know one thing for certain. To use Beck effectively, you need to read, and reread the book...I have no experience with the workbook, so maybe that would suffice, but you need to read and reread....that is why this online study group is something to which I have committed..well, and then there is the affection I feel for all here......:hug:

The Beck Diet Solution

"In order to lose weight this time, you'll learn crucial Cognitive Therapy techniques that you'll use for the rest of your life. They include planning what you'll eat, choosing healthy foods, resisting cravings, soothing yourself without turning to food ..you'll also learn essential skills to counter sabotaging thoughts....the good news is that once you learn these skills, dieting becomes much easier..".Beck, pg. 41

Credit to moxiesd..you are a quick study!!

coastalsue
01-05-2008, 01:10 PM
Hi everyone,

thanks for the conerns-The storm not as bad as thought- we have been out of power since Thurs wasn't expected back on until Sunday Morning-but we got some on today-But things are flickering so I am signing off until I can trust that there will be no brown or black outs.
sue

maryblu
01-05-2008, 03:07 PM
Yay! Yay, Sue. So glad you chould check in.

Now if I knew where everyone else posting here lives, I could worry about them for the rest of the day!

hbuchwald
01-05-2008, 03:16 PM
Whew! So glad to hear from coastalsue! Our thoughts are with you Sue-having no power for multiple days is NOT fun. Yes, our country can learn from the basic concept of supply and demand and be prepared and proactive. Moment of silence on that.

That clothing hanging thing is so true! There is nothing like the feeling of a contant binding waistband or the feeling of the waist of your shirt touching where it didn't touch before. It really does affect a person's mood/demeanor/outlook. The same goes when clothing really fits and is RIGHT for the body. Yes, we should be dressing our bodies with things that make us feel our best no matter our weight.

I love the discussions going day by day with no pressure to have a one to one ratio of Beck days to days of the week. I am rereading so already feel like I have my plans established but I would still love to discuss and am open to changing or refining based on my new learnings/insights.

Welcome Moxieds! I am one of the people who have both the book and the workbook. I like having both but the basic difference is that the book goes into more depth. The workbook has places to write, lists and is softcover, larger in length/width but thinner so is easier for me to take in a bag. I like to look at both. I agree that to really get the ideas, reading Judith's writing is the way to go. One of the steps/strategies is to find a diet coach. This group is my collective "diet coach" and I think that that is true for some others as well. Our conversations are a great supplement to that-discussing what we have read and sharing experiences with the common philosphy and desire in mind.

Today, I am going to do my new "Dancing with the Stars Cardio" dvd. Tease me all you want about it friends but my body will be moving! :)

Have a wonderful day!

til tomorrow, Heidi

eusebius
01-05-2008, 11:59 PM
Hi everyone!

I would really like to join in on the discussions here. I've been on 3FC before (waving hi at Ann from the WW board!!) but I have just discovered the Beck Diet Solution and I'm very excited about it. I've been listening to the audiobook version and have ordered the book from Amazon. Today is Day 6 for me (5 pounds gone already!!) and so now I am seeking a "diet coach". This group looks like the coach for me, and of course I would be very happy to help coach all of you as well, in whatever way I can.

So first of all I would like to share my Advantages Response card with you:

Looking and feeling better
Better health
Decrease depression
Better performance in running and yoga
Role modeling for my daughter
More energy
Longer life
Better self-esteem
More confidence
Helping my family to eat healthy
Better sex(!)
More options for physically active hobbies
More fun shopping
Looking better in more kinds of clothes
A sense of accomplishment
Better first impressions on people
Looking great in a bathing suit!!
New concerto gown

This last begs some explanation - I am a pianist and will be premiering a new piano concerto in March. I'd really like to look smokin' in a new evening gown having lost 15# or so by then!

looking forward to meeting all of you,
Erika

BillBlueEyes
01-06-2008, 05:19 AM
:welcome: to the Beck discussion group Erika (eusebius) :welcome:

There's always room for one more here.

P.S. Does your moniker refer to Pope Saint Eusebius? If so, you're the first pope on this thread.

__________________
XXXXXXX 7 XXXXXXX 14 XXXXXXX 21 XXXXXXX 28 XXXXXXX 35 XXXXXXX 42
Completed Beck Program-day 42. You’ve met your goal. Congratulations!

BillBlueEyes
01-06-2008, 06:45 AM
Had fresh blueberries with my granola yesterday (on sale for $0.99 for a 4.4 oz. container). My apologies for contributing to global warming by flying these from Chile, but they sure helped me ignore that it was below freezing outside.

Another item from my Advantages Response Card:Avoid the prejudices directed to a FAT personThe prejudices exist or I project that they exist. In either case it affects my interaction with the world. When I first wrote this on my Card, I was embarrassed at the thought that I could also hold prejudice about fat people. So, I've been drawn to confront that and to work to put it aside when I encounter other fat people.


Sue (CoastalSue) - Glad you're OK.

MaryBlu - Your comment hit me: "To use Beck effectively, you need to read, and reread the book." Methinks I'm getting more from the introductory chapters on the second reading.

Heidi (hbuchwald) - TEASE, TEASE - Heidi does "Dancing with the Stars Cardio" [ /font=middle school]

Erika (eusebius) - I'm moved that your Advantages include "Role modeling for my daughter." Added that to my Card for my two adult children.

Readers - "It takes time for new ideas to sink in and to become proficient at changing your ideas and behavior." Beck, pg 47.

__________________
XXXXXXX 7 XXXXXXX 14 XXXXXXX 21 XXXXXXX 28 XXXXXXX 35 XXXXXXX 42
Completed Beck Program-day 42. You’ve met your goal. Congratulations!

Newlifestyle
01-06-2008, 08:40 AM
Good morning everyone.

Sue, I am glad you are okay. From what we have seen on the news it is really bad in California.

Welcome Erika....It is nice to see you. Which diet plan are you choosing with BDS?

Maryblu, as I an going through the workbook, some of my responses on the DDS questionnaire have changed. Yeah,,,,I think some of what I read originally I am practicing.

Heidi, Enjoy your Dancing. I love to dance like no one is watching, in my house of course, my DS dances around the living room with me. We have so much fun and it is exercise I hadn't counted on. I too like the workbook. I find it easier to take everywhere with me. I am not worried about it. The hardcover book I am worried about damaging. The workbook is like a scratch pad for me, as I am reading I highlight, and write things in it.

Bill, you wrote Readers - "It takes time for new ideas to sink in and to become proficient at changing your ideas and behavior." Beck, pg 47.
, as I read this, I realized that I want things to happen now, today, this moment. I need to understand that it does take time and that is okay. I think I need to be more patient with this whole thing.
I do hope the weather gets warmer in your area.

Hello to Cammie, SuchATwin, Moxieds, Avvocata and anyone else I missed.

Well, I am off for a run have a great day everyone.

Take Care
Ann

coastalsue
01-06-2008, 02:48 PM
Good Morning to all

Welcome to Erika-loved your grahics-what a great skill and talent to doing a piano concerto- whose work will you be doing? thanks for posting your advantages card.Had lot which works for me too.

It is nice to have power again-While the media had dire forecast for our coastal area, we were very lucky over the many other parts of the state. Along with no power even the local radio( the only one we can get on our portable) was out. Newspaper were not getting delivered up here from the Bay Area. The rumors were going wild about no power for up to a week-Maybe if the 2nd storm had the strong winds as projected that would have been true. Really worried about some of our children and possible trees falling on their place. Right now all is well for our family while others have suffered much.

I am ready to be a Becker again. I went to the store on Friday-power already out with many days of outage being predicted- to get some raw veggies for the duration. Store had a generator-but it would not keep the ice cream cold enought so there was free-take all you want ice cream. Ok Bill you uderstand the draw for Free Food. The kids were running around the store with plastic spoons eating the ice cream out of cartons. Yep I took one Ben and Jerry's -Only later did I count the Calories-600 for one cup of ice cream. YIPES

Hey Cammiecam-Bonjour-glad you had a grand time in Paris!

There is so many posting which have given much to ponder, relate to and learn from.

Bill ,so relate to the idea that Weight that distorts all other medical advise A Pet peeves is the medical profession dealing any symptom as a result of my obesity. I was teaching in my 50's. I Knew I was exhausted unlike normal teaching-not just because I was a fat teacher-The Doctor just keep dismissing it due to my weight. After a month of me pushing it, the tests were done and surprise, surprise I had mono. Recovery was much harder because I keep working so long and was so exhuasted.

Folks I am working on my new advantage list. I want to include the goal of losing weight because I have learn new attitudes toward food. Learning that the primary power of food in life is for a healthy body and not for emotional support.

Thanks to everyone for the posting -I need this daily check in to help stay on track, love sharing the successes and ideas on how to learn how to do this stuff.
sue

maryblu
01-06-2008, 07:40 PM
I really do believe it! She is a genius.

I was thinking about what our discussion for day two would be.....choosing 2 diet plans....mostly was going to encourage anyone who wanted to share his or her plans to please do so....and was also going to suggest that some of us might find it unneccesary and even sorta redundant, given that probably 75% + of the posts on 3FCs discuss said same.

Then the genius of her requiring us to pick two plans before we even start really hit me.

I am not sure I am going to be able to say it clearly, but I know one of you will!!! It's such a message, that if we get off track, we already have a backup plan....it is just one more piece of insurance that we can't fail....if we get off track, if the first diet fails; there is no reason, no excuse to quit, because we have another right there and ready to go. Please, someone say this better!

I really like her suggestion to rank in priority order our Advantage Responses.
I think my # 1 reason is:

Being thin makes me feel so much younger.

I am talking about the psychological "high" of feeling younger. Obviously, being overweight ages your appearance as much as smoking or aging your skin in the sun, but I am talking about that young, light-hearted feeling.
It feels so good! Getting younger feels good!

Rock on!

eusebius
01-06-2008, 11:15 PM
Good evening everyone,

I feel proud of what I accomplished today. In the morning I had a big fight with my little daughter about clothes. Afterwards I felt very sad and on the brink of tears for a couple of hours. I suffer from depression and it is generally under control with antidepressants and yoga, but sometimes it rears its ugly head and I end up eating to stuff it down. Not this time! I went to church and felt much better afterwards, then ate healthy for the rest of the day. The advantages response card, etc., certainly didn't hurt!

Day 7 is here for me and I moved some food around a bit, but mostly my environment isn't a big problem for me ... we don't have candy dishes or chips lying around, and I don't work in a traditional office setting. So that's a blessing. What I would like to change about my environment is the convenience store being too darn close to the house! LOL

Bill - Thanks for the welcome!! LOL, no, I'm not Pope Eusebius ... the name refers to one of the characters the composer Schumann created in his writings. (You can see Clara Schumann there in my avatar ...) My PhD diss was about Schumann so I got into the habit of using that as a screen name.
BTW I'm totally floored by your success in weight loss!! Fabulous! You are the same height as my DH ... I would love to see him have similar success. Also I love your thoughtful posts!

Ann - Great to see you here as well! I am still doing WW Flex and may go back to posting on that board as well. My backup plan is counting calories, perhaps with the help of eDiets, as that was successful for me in the past.

Hi Sue - Thanks for your kind words! The concerto was written by a friend of mine who lives here in Hamilton ON. I am thrilled to have the opportunity. The thing is hard though and I am stressing out a bit about learning it in time.
Glad to hear that you made it through the storm OK and you are back on track with raw veggies!! I sure love Ben & Jerry's though. I visited their factory on my honeymoon many years ago :)

Maryblu - Is that you in your avatar? You're gorgeous :) It is true that JB's idea of picking TWO diet plans is very clever indeed!

Well everyone, I've got a super early morning tomorrow so time to relax with some tea and get ready for sleep. Talk to you soon
cheers
Erika

hbuchwald
01-06-2008, 11:47 PM
Hi there peeps (pardon the pun since we are on the 3 fat CHICKS site and all...),
CoastalSue: so glad that the storm hasn't severely affected you or your family. I am glad that you are hanging in there! I cannot imagine my response to "free ice cream" and with people running around eating it right then and there in a frenzy.

MaryBlu: You said it very well-Beck IS genious!! I think that about so many of the responses to sabotaging thoughts that she asks us to be ready for ahead of time.

I am doing this the second time around and my food plans have changed. I am sort of doing WW but not using their site or counting points. So what AM I doing that is WW? I have done WW so much that I know about how much to eat and when I first found my sp site I began recording what I was eating (based on WW) and seeing the nutrient value and calories, etc... I realized that the points was a game for me. I found myself saying, "how much of xyz can I have today?"... it felt like this type of thinking didn't help me in my quest to "eat like a thin person". I want to address hunger, eating to comfortable, etc.. and not eat as much as I can for my points. I am NOT knocking WW at all-just realizing that it isn't for me right now in it's full program state. I have been eating within a certain number of calories and aiming for ranges of healthy amounts of the different food groups and nutrients. My second plan would be WW flex plan until I find something else that sounds healthy/balanced and right for me.

Bill-leave it to you to tease me huh? :) Loved the middle school font... you are a piece of work my friend! :) Avoiding fat people prejudice is a good one (advantage). I do know what you mean. It is good for all of us to think about our own prejudices toward fat people-thanks for bringing that up.

One more thought I had today was that I feel like I am beginning to feel the benefits of losing weight. I still have a long way to go but I find that I am looking people in the eye more, wanting to connect more with people instead of be rushed/focused/whatever excuse I had for it. I struggle with depression-it is mainly managed well with meds and therapy but it has continued to be a thin blanket over me... I feel like I am having periods of time where it is lifting! When Bill talked about fat people prejudice, I thought of how I am "connecting more with people" and feel that people are connecting more with me too. I am still fat, but presenting myself a little differently, open to more interaction, more confident or something. I am still sorting it out but somethign is happening that is good! There is fat people prejudice, I believe that this is true.

Newlifestyle: I definitely fight that wanting things to come quickly and have immediate results. I am trying REALLY hard to credit even the small things that I do that go toward me reaching my goals. It will be something that I work on for a long time-it is STRONG!

Question for those that are maintaining: Do you feel like the advantages to having lost weight is helping you do what needs to be done to maintain? Sometimes I think that past efforts at weight loss have not "stuck" because after losing, there wasn't a visible "return" on the efforts. Does this make sense? I think that having those reasons for losing weight solidified into my mind are really great since MOST are about good health, living a full life, etc...

BillBlueEyes
01-07-2008, 07:01 AM
Felt soooo good to be above 40 degrees F yesterday. The water wasn't frozen on the local pond; both Common Mergansers and Hooded Mergansers were out.

Another item from my Advantages Response Card:Improved Flexibility - Comfortably get in and out of cars. Exit boat during hurricane evacuation.I was slow to admit that my maneuverability was decreased by my weight. "Hurricane evacuation" refers to Katrina; watching a large woman on the news requiring much assistance to get out of a rescue boat was one of the triggers to starting my healthy lifestyle journey.

Food plan is portion control. DW makes a thoughtful, nutritionally balanced dinner every night; my contribution is to eat portions that are her size and to avoid taking seconds. I make my breakfast (granola) and bring my lunch to work (leftovers, beans, veggies). My backup plan is to reduce the generous rules I allow for restaurants (extra 25 to 50%) and special occasions (extra 50 to 100%). I rarely use the wide range, but having a big safety net keeps me from passing that breaking point where I give up responsibility and eat everything in sight. My backup plan is to reduce my portion sizes and to restrict my extras when eating out.


Sue (CoastalSue) - Congratulations for taking only one FREE Ben and Jerry's. Hope I never have to face that one. Just sitting here I am picturing how many pints I could carry and wondering whether I'd be willing to knock over the little kids to get the last pint of Swiss Almond Vanilla - a trigger flavor for me.


MaryBlu - I think you're onto something about the backup food plan. The more we can reduce the notion that we're in a unique situation for which no previous rules apply, the more we can stay in touch with all our sane emotions and intelligence for making wise choices.


Ann (Newlifestyle) - LOL, you remind me of the prayer: "Lord, grant me patience. NOW."


Heidi (hbuchwald) - LOL at "peeps" - trying to identify. I DO identify with the notion of beating the rules of the game rather than working for a healthy lifestyle. I personally couldn't have an eating plan that included a "zero points soup." My response to that would be soooo irrational that it would eclipse my current response to FREE food.

I'm maintaining and I DO feel that the advantages already realized help keep me on track. Which is good, because that takes the place of the endorphin thrill of watching the scale numbers dropping. For example, I note and enjoy each time I climb 3 flights of stairs without being winded. I frequently note the small maneuverings that increased flexibility allows me.


Erika (eusebius) - Congratulations on your recovery from the stress of working with your daughter without using food. That was a classic Beck strategy. Glad to hear you're not the Pope, LOL; I feel more comfortable already.


Readers - "If you struggle with weight loss, you have a different mindset about food and eating than people who don't struggle with their weight." Beck, pg 43.

__________________
XXXXXXX 7 XXXXXXX 14 XXXXXXX 21 XXXXXXX 28 XXXXXXX 35 XXXXXXX 42
Completed Beck Program-day 42. You’ve met your goal. Congratulations!

SuchAtwin
01-07-2008, 10:25 AM
Hello all. Very nice to meet you Ericka. I love your avitar!
I do not have anything to contribute at the moment. Just know that I am so enjoying the posts. Sue, I am so glad you are safe. Heidi, where did you find your video? It sounds like one I would like.

SuchAtwin
01-07-2008, 10:29 AM
Oops. I meant to say hello and welcome to Moxie. Your success is an inspiration to me.

Newlifestyle
01-07-2008, 09:36 PM
Hello everyone

I do hope you all had a successful day, in whatever way you measure success for you.

I too like how Beck tells us to pick two diet plans so that if the first one isn't working for us, we can move to the second diet plan instead of giving up because we are struggling with the first plan. Also Beck's suggestion that we modify the diet in advance rather than on the spot makes sense to me. I do believe this is why people who plan their "cheats" (for lack of a better word) don't go crazy when the have them as they are controlled and planned rather than making a decision on the spot. I know it depends on my mood when I am making decisions. If my food is all planned out for the day, I do much better than if I am winging it.
I am excited committing to a diet plan, and even having a back up.

Have a great night everyone.
Take Care
Ann

maryblu
01-07-2008, 10:05 PM
I can't believe it, dear Beckies, but it has been a week since we began our Beck study group. I look forward to the discussions led by whoever steps up and starts us on day 3. I confess, I have been reading ahead...:D You know I am the rebellious one.

I really have to say, it has been enjoyable "leading" the discussion. It is kinda the old adage, if you want to really learn something, teach it. There were so many lines in Beck that I read and just had to share!

Thanks to all ...everyone for the great thoughts and discussion.

M

hbuchwald
01-08-2008, 01:11 AM
Hi there fellow "Beckies" (great nickname for us Maryblu),
I am really inspired by the response about maintaining Bill-thanks for sharing. While I did share with all of you that it is hard when people begin to comment on my weight, it is also hard when they STOP (if I get to my goal weight and look the same all the time...not smaller from the time before they saw me)... It makes so much sense to really keep pounding those reasons and appreciating even the small things that we experience from losing weight.

Thank you Maryblu for leading the first 2 days of Beck-you did a thorough and thoughtful job of it.

SuchaTwin-I assume that you are talking about the Dancing with the Stars Cardio video?? I got it from amazon.com. I also saw it in an exercise video catalog that I get periodically in the mail. It is fun!

Off to bed-have a great day tomorrow everyone-Heidi

coastalsue
01-08-2008, 02:15 AM
Hi everyone,

Thanks MaryBlue for getting us started again with the book. I will do the section 5 and 6 after next week as my lent book should be returned by the end of this week.

My diet plan-I do like working with staying about 1600 cal a day based upon my weight and limited exercising. WW point is the back up, but really find it ackward to have to calculate the points-If I ate more chain restaurant foods or premade dishes it would be easier as WW is so good about giving the points for those types of foods.

I have read that some of us have to cope with depression-add me to those numbers. I was using an anti-depressive drug, but about 6 months ago found I got so nervous in general and particular when I driving I got off of them. I am fine right now , but I respect that depression can be cyclical. I have been using meditation to understand how passing most of our thoughts are. Plus swimming is a really loved exercise-so calming for me. And honestly still use at time some comfort foods-i,e, ice cream during the the strong storms and power outage.

I find my two very serious trigger areas are emotional- A habit of self medicating my feelings and social-being around others who are eating. I need help in idenifying those those thoughts which last a millesecond prior to eating. I know I have them they just do not register in my brain long enough to argue with the sabatoging thoughts.

So agree with you Heidi about feeling more self confident when dealing with people. I am still over 300 but I know that I have lost over 60 lbs. I feel more poised than an year ago and folk do seem friendlier to me. Some of it has to be me less angry with me-In the past I would be a more upset when size 12 gaining weight than at a size 20 who was losing. The role of attitude versus what the scales absolutly say!

Erika- Yesterday went to a great classical music performance-violinist, cellist and pianist Roy Bogas-What a Concert. would Love to hear you play Great job about not eating when feeling so frustrated and down about the fight with your daughter. One of area I need to gain more skills in.

Bill, glad you are fighting your prejudice about the fatties of the world. One of the greatest gifts we can give others and our own self is acceptance and compassion. Inspite of people's appearance and personality one never know the battles they are fighting inside.

Ann, I am working on planning my treats-Too often I am either "Perfect" modest amount of only nutritious foods to "overindulgent"-large amount of only nonnutritious foods. Working on getting a balance.

a big wave to all of us Beckers!

BillBlueEyes
01-08-2008, 07:40 AM
The days seem longer already - nice.

Another item on my Advantages Response Card is:Create a single wardrobe. Reduce the clutter of mounds of clothes I can't wear.When I'm living in the state of suspended personal responsibility - knowing that I'm at the wrong weight - I keep all my outgrown clothes in my closet, in stacks, in another room, wherever. I create clutter that further reduces my responsibility for my life. I have only a few items that currently fit yet have no space to add a new purchase. When I lost the 80 pounds, I felt free to donate all the mounds and to create space in my closet that allowed me to choose clothes that fit and that I liked.

I once asked a thin friend how he managed to stay the same size over the years. He replied that he had a whole wardrobe of well fitted clothes and whenever they began to feel snug, he cut back. I was struck that my behavior was to just buy a few temporary items at the next size up.



Sue (CoastalSue) - Thanks for taking on Program-days 5 and 6 next week. We're now looking for someone to step up for Program-days 3 and 4 this week. Who can do that?

Your comment "...large amount of only non-nutritious foods" reminds me that my excess weight came from packaged cookies and the like - not from too many apples. If your store were giving away free apples rather than Ben & Jerry's ice cream, I think I'd happily take the amount that would fit in my fridge that we could consume in a week. I wouldn't even think of knocking over small kids to get more.


MaryBlu - Thanks for getting us started on 2008 with Program-Days 1 and 2, and for the reminder, "It is kinda the old adage, if you want to really learn something, teach it."


SuchAtwin - Waving back.


Ann (Newlifestyle) - "If my food is all planned out for the day, I do much better than if I am winging it." That is true for me also, and it also grates me. For some reason I feel degraded that I have to plan as differs from the mythical thin people who eat intentionally with no effort. This reminds me that I also believe in mythical wise people who act without self doubt. Like really, LOL.


Cammie (CammieCam) - Come tell us just one nice thing about your Paris trip before you forget them all.


Heidi (hbuchwald) - Your observation, "... it is also hard when they STOP [commenting on the weight loss]" reminds me that I give over feeling my own self worth to the comments of others. So you hit it, another good reason to keep reading my Advantages Response Card is to own my own self worth independent of comments by others.


Erika (eusebius) - The second item on your Advantages Response Card is "Better health." That's also my second item - wonder where it fits in everybodys' prioritized list.


Readers - "The way you think - seeing hunger as an emergency, overestimating the discomfort and duration of cravings, underestimating how thin people restrict their eating - makes it more difficult for you to stick with a diet." Beck, pg 43. 

__________________
XXXXXXX 7 XXXXXXX 14 XXXXXXX 21 XXXXXXX 28 XXXXXXX 35 XXXXXXX 42
Completed Beck Program-day 42. You’ve met your goal. Congratulations!

Newlifestyle
01-08-2008, 08:38 AM
Good morning all.

Maryblu, thank you so very much for starting us out.

Sue, I too found that I am more accepting of myself at this weight, than when I was 130 pounds. I was so critical. At 230, I was confident and my weight did not bother me. It was when I read the file at the doctors office and it said, morbidly obese....I was shocked, I had no idea. I knew I was fat but had no idea there was a problem with it.....I guess because I didn't have any medical problems yet,,,,,I do say yet, because it was just over time and I would have developed problems.

Erika, great job not emotionally eating after being stressed. Yeah you.

Heidi, what other sort of videos do you have,,,,,just teasing. It was your response that made me ask this. I too think the Dancing With The Stars would be a fun workout.

SuchATwin, I do hope your day is going well and you come and visit here.

Cammie, how are you doing? Where are you

Bill, I like planning my meals. When people ask what I am having for lunch, I look in my bag and act surprised, like I had nothing to do with packing it. It is kind of fun. I think that I have kept off my weight this time because I got rid of the clothes that were too big for me. I have clothes that fit me and ones that are smaller. I too heard from thin friends that gaining weight is not an option for them as they can't afford to buy new clothes. Good strategy for me.


Have a great day everyone and enjoy.
Ann

Newlifestyle
01-08-2008, 08:48 AM
Oh I have such fond memories of Day 3......Sit Down to Eat

I like how Beck reminds us to notice and savor every bite. I never realized that I would love the taste of food. Previously I would just shovel food into my mouth without ever really tasting it. It was mindless eating at it's best.

Eating my food while sitting down is easy as I use my response card 1.....Just Do It Anyway.

When Beck wrote standing up to eat is not an option, I believed this to be true. At least for me it is true.

I could previously convince myself it was okay to stand up and eat as it would only be one time but I realize one time turned into two, and so on. It is a destructive behavior for me. This is one skill I need if I want to continue to lose weight and keep out what I have lost.

Have a wonderful day enjoying all meals, snacks, bites, tastes, licks, while sitting.

Ann

avvocata
01-08-2008, 08:58 AM
I'm amazed both by how hard this is (sitting down for every bite) and how ably it points up the number of times a day I take "just a bite" of something I don't count! No wonder those many stone crept on... Being food obsessed isn't the same as being aware, I'm learning. Powerful strategy, this.

nighthawk
01-08-2008, 05:04 PM
Hi Everyone,
I'd love to join your group, I've had the book and workbook for quite some time but I got stuck on week 16 in Nov and just drifted away from the whole thing. I have recommitted to it and am starting right back at day 1.
I have managed to hang in there with the diet plan, but I know from experience diet alone won't get me through for the long term.
Cheers!
Lori

coastalsue
01-08-2008, 07:49 PM
Howdy,

Welcome nighthawk- it great you'll be joining us. I am with you that I took an extented holiday break from daily Beck chapters and checklists while hanging on to a loose generous food plan. Time to get back to losing weight again.

MaryBlu has lead(very nicely also) the discussion of section 1 and 2 as we are doing just 2 sections a week.

I also have notice that while I "love" food, I can forget to taste it. Had a yummy lunch plan after a long tiresome meeting-During lunch, I was getting worked up about some of the politics and I forgot to really enjoy and taste my food.-I actually thought what a waste of great flavors to discuss this while eating and stop thinking about the meeting.

I want to add to the my sitting down card a concept of enjoying the food while seating.

I am working on including more planned treats for my week-Went to our local markets and no one is carrying ice cream becauses of power shortages and the stores lost so much money. I guess we'll have to wait until the series of storms come and go before they restock again. One is not carrying any dairy at all-thanks heaven the other carries cottage cheese and milk. Otherwise it is an 2 hour round trip.

A bit stressed at home as we are doing a massive clean up and purging of old mementos, furniture, projects, unused but useful stuff, kind of like this but not really, maybe tomarrow I find a place for it stuff, stuff, stuff, - the beginning was painful, but we finally see a difference-We should be done in 3 more days or so. Then room to do more projects and space to find the supplies. It is odd but as I work at eating less, I seem to need less in other areas in my life. This all started with cleaning out the drawers when we had no electrictry and now has excalated to full gargage(never has room for a car) make over-the power of getting bored.

best wishes to all
sue

SuchAtwin
01-09-2008, 01:21 AM
Sue, you are picking up the theme I mentioned when I first joined this group. Letting go. For those just joining, I am a twin and such a twin that I find I "need" so many things for my own security. This is changing but it is a struggle. I have not read past chapter 15 in J. Beck's book yet because I found myself rebelling to her suggestions. I am becoming more patient with myself and just re-reading and listening here to others who have been succesful at this discipline.
Heidi, thanks for more info on the video. I will look for it on Amazon. I am all about hokey fun for exercise. I saw Richard Simmons on The Today Show this morning and fondly remembered using one of his videos in the past.
About depresssion. I too have had major bouts and thank God for medication to see me through. It is not a cure but gives one a toe hold in the rock face of the mountain--for some. Thankfully, I have developed a pretty healthy sense of humor so that I can allow myself to forgive myself and others more easily than I could in the past. I read once that depression is anger turned inward and I so believe that this is true. It is holding onto behavior. Let's all resolve to let stuff go. If only we (I mean I), didn't have just a hang-up with wasting things. Would Beck say, Oh well?

BillBlueEyes
01-09-2008, 06:20 AM
:welcome: to the Beck discussion group, Lori (nighthawk), :welcome:

Are you from that part of Canada where you Canadians keep all the neat stuff like the Athabasca Glacier, Jasper National Park, and the Canadian Rockies?


__________________
XXXXXXX 7 XXXXXXX 14 XXXXXXX 21 XXXXXXX 28 XXXXXXX 35 XXXXXXX 42
Completed Beck Program-day 42. You’ve met your goal. Congratulations!

BillBlueEyes
01-09-2008, 06:59 AM
Enjoyed 70 degree weather yesterday; went walking dressed like it was Spring. Had to bring my oldest car for its emissions inspection, having failed its first attempt two months ago. IT PASSED. Feels as good as an NSV.

Originally I dismissed Sit Down to Eat since I couldn't imagine that I didn't. Then I began to notice. I ate a sample of each item I put on my plate. I popped one in my mouth of whatever (edible) I took out of a bag. I snacked from my plate on the way to the table, even though I was walking only a few feet to the kitchen table. Stopping all these helped me to focus on eating mindfully, seemed to reduce the trivialization of food. Sure caught me by surprise.


Sue (CoastalSue) - Congratulations on being able to get rid of "unused but useful stuff." After I perfectly resolve my relationship with food, LOL, attacking my clutter is next. Do you have any suggestions?

SuchAtwin - Interesting that you connect "wasting things" and "let stuff go." I need to grow in both places; hadn't thought of them as connected.

Ann (Newlifestyle) - Your comment about shoveling in the food reminds me of the notion from the Omnivore's Delima that only the first bite of a McDonald's hamburger has any taste; after that, it's just comfort food mush.

avvocata - Loved you insight, "Being food obsessed isn't the same as being aware." I so hate admitting that I am obsessed with food. Oh Well.

Lori (nighthawk) - Yeah, diet alone isn't enough for me; beginning to believe that the Beck strategies might provide the difference.

Readers - "No matter what your mindset is like today, you can learn how to change it, not only to lose weight, but also to make sure that you keep it off - permanently." Beck, pg 43. 

__________________
XXXXXXX 7 XXXXXXX 14 XXXXXXX 21 XXXXXXX 28 XXXXXXX 35 XXXXXXX 42
Completed Beck Program-day 42. You’ve met your goal. Congratulations!

hbuchwald
01-09-2008, 10:36 AM
Hi there friends,
I didn't check in yesterday since I went to bed early. I found out yesterday that my dog, who I thought was "off a bit" is experiencing liver failure! I am devastated. I don't know the prognosis yet but I was running him to vet appts. yesterday and quite emotional all day long. I ate according to my plan and chose to skip exercising to go to bed. I kept waking up wondering if he was still with us... don't know how long this will last but it will put my healthy living skills to the test for sure. This is even more reason for me to take care of myself-keep my energy up to take extra care of him and to be able to keep up with my other responsibilities and life activities. I am so sad. The lifespan of our pets don't match up to humans' and that BITES!

Anyway, I read everybody's current comments and always enjoy taking them all in. Thanks for listening/reading and keep on hanging in there!

eusebius
01-09-2008, 11:53 AM
Hi everyone!
Welcome Lori, where are you at? I have a brother in the South Surrey/White Rock area.
SuchATwin - ITA, depression recovery is about letting go of so many layers of things. I find that yoga is incredibly helpful for this.
Bill - decluttering is a big goal of mine as well. I find that living healthier physically naturally leads to a desire to let go of clutter. I've been using the "Change Your Life Challenge" for this (www.changeyourlifechallenge.com) but Flylady or Peter Walsh's book "It's all too much!" have worked really well for many people.
Tuesdays are so crazy for me - drop off the kid at 7:30 at daycare, 45 min commute, 9 to 4:30 without a break, come home, pick up kid, go shopping ... aagh! But I got up at 5:30 to do yoga ... and again today at 6:30 ... so that is helping.
Heidi - big hugs to you and prayers for your beloved pup. I know how important pets can become in our lives and this must just be so difficult to go through.
Have a great day everyone,
Erika

Newlifestyle
01-09-2008, 11:55 AM
Hello everyone,
I hope you are all doing well. I just lost my post.....I will send out a condensed version.

Heidi, I am so sorry to hear about your dog. I hope you are able to take care of your dog and yourself through this difficult time.

Welcome Lori, which part of BC do you live in?

Sue, I find as I start to be more aware of me eating, I want to get rid of clutter in my garage and basement. It is almost as if I had a need to keep this clutter and a need for certain food. I think of you swimming and think I should start swimming. I love swimming, I find it so relaxing.

Maryblu, how are you doing?

Cammie, where are you?

SuchATwin, I think forgiving ones self is so difficult for me. I can forgive others for things they do, and I encourage them to forgive themselves. I am just much harder on myself. I need help with this one.

Bill congrats on your vehicle passing the emissions test....it probably is a relief. You don't want to add more pollutants into our environment. We try to walk every where and people always ask why we don't have our car. It is not only healthy for us but for others too.

Erika, hi there, how are you doing?

Waving hello to everyone.
Have a great day.
Ann

SuchAtwin
01-09-2008, 04:32 PM
Avvocata: Welcome. Are you a lawyer? Just wondering about your tag. In Texas, we would just think you were referring to our favorite fruit (avocado) using a phonetic spelling. Good for you for sitting down to eat.
Welcome also to Lori. Sounds like we are about in the same place in the book.
I would make some helpful comments to this post, but my perimenopause has me crazy today with heart palps, cravings, etc. I will credit myself for driving away from a Sonic after parking to look at the ice cream pictures on the menu. I decided a beer and a nap would be better for coping. I'll let you all know how that worked for me later.
Heidi, so sorry about your pup. Obviously you are a loving master and friend.
Hello and hugs to all my friends here. For typing ease, ya'll can call me...
Kitt

nighthawk
01-09-2008, 06:56 PM
Hi Everyone,
Thanks for the warm welcome! I'm looking forward to getting to know you all.
I'm am living in Kelowna BC which is east of all that Rocky mountain splendor you mentioned Bill and West of White Rock/ Surrey where your brother is Erika. We do have a huge big lake for the summer and a ski hill for the winter now to get fit enough to do all those lovely sporty things. On my Advantages Response Card is Be comfortable trying new physical activities.
Sue I am also doing a "stuff" purge mostly because I am moving but it always feels good. My Dad is a major pack rat so it's in my DNA and I am always doing battle ..lol
Bill I so do the pick at my meal while walking to the table it's nuts that I can't wait that whole four seconds it takes to get there. I'm always struggling to eat sitting down.
Cheeers
Lori

hbuchwald
01-10-2008, 01:02 AM
Hi there everyone,
Thanks for your well wishes. Pup is being such a trouper-he is really keeping his head up for one who feels so awful!

Today was a bit better than yesterday-except that I am so tired from the emotional energy expenditure and then life.... you all know!

Eating fine...trying to make my housecleaning aerobic for exercise tonight. I must go to bed after that.

I love the declutter movement. I really try to get rid of anything that I realize I don't love or need as soon as I make that realization. I use freecycle and craigslist for getting rid of higher ticket items but mostly send it to Goodwill.

Have a wonderful night-sounds like we have lots of people from up north! I live in WA state.

Til' tomorrow (I feel better at least checking with SOMETHING each day!)... Heidi

coastalsue
01-10-2008, 02:19 AM
Hello All,

Just a short note as our local server will down for maintanence after 10:30.

I honestly still not really stricking to a true 1600 cals a day-just added enough more quick treats to hamper weight loss. I am wondering if I am waiting until day 14 or so stick to diet?

My sabatoging thought is that I have the foundation and eating basically on plan but I'll just add some tastes of caloric foods because soon (but not today) I'll be very strict again. I have been doing this for over 3 weeks now. I know that we have increase our wine and martini drinking-given wine and gin for gifts. I bet the evening cocktails are leading me astray. Luckly we should run out soon.

What is Boston doing warmer that California? There was a bit of sun today, but raining again tonight. Tomarrow we drive 4 hrs to help one of our kids with a plumbing problem. Dh and I still are getting purging badges-this little place is looking spacious.

Heidi-glad to hear you pup is doing better. Animals can become such members of the family. Pets' uncomplicated and complete acceptance of us is is such a gift.

Kitt-oh those sensuous pics of food on menus. I flip at chili's hugh multi page menu of glistening calorie ladden foods. talk about calorie porn-my eyes glaze over, mouth waters-not good. But good for you for resisting it.

Big wave to everyone-
sue

BillBlueEyes
01-10-2008, 07:21 AM
Rereading Program-day 3, Eat Sitting Down, confronts me about samples at Whole Foods. Beck writes, "When you sit down to eat, especially at your dining table, you've made a conscious decision to eat." So, Beck's word for the opposite of mindless is conscious. When I'm grazing mindlessly, I'm not eating consciously. It is hard for me to sort my conflicting goals here. For example, the other day at Whole Foods I ate a grapefruit wedge - arguably I learned where grapefruits are developing in their season, and certainly had few enough calories. And then had a very tiny sample of $40.99/lb. cheese - the only way a $40.99/lb. cheese is likely to pass my lips. The cheese was good, but I learned that it is not, for me, 3x as good as the most expensive I'm likely to buy. Work to do here.


Sue (CoastalSue) - Congratulations for "still are getting purging badges." You're an inspiration for me. Also sounds like you've identified a cause for weight loss plateau and have a plan to get back on track. I'm rooting for you.

Kitt (SuchAtwin) - Kudos for driving away from the Sonic.

Ann (Newlifestyle) - I'm encouraged that you relate the need for certain food with the need to keep clutter; perhaps I can use that thought to try to leverage my gains in food control to a gain in clutter control.

Cammie (CammieCam) - Perhaps just a little vignette?

Heidi (hbuchwald) - Sending my best wishes for your pup. Kudos to you for keeping to your food plan during an emotionally difficult time.

Erika (eusebius) – Thanks for the clutter references; I'll look into those.

Lori (nighthawk) - Good luck in you struggles to get to the table before snacking. Do you have any insights about sampling at the store that might help me?

Readers - "Since you'll be eating less food, it's important for you to see all of it spread in front of you at meal or snack time so you can be more visually satisfied." Beck, pg 71. 

__________________
XXXXXXX 7 XXXXXXX 14 XXXXXXX 21 XXXXXXX 28 XXXXXXX 35 XXXXXXX 42
Completed Beck Program-day 42. You’ve met your goal. Congratulations!

coastalsue
01-10-2008, 01:17 PM
Hello to all,

Bill I just read your posting and really understand that sense of conflicting goals. While the core foundation of Beck is excellent, there is a rigidity which is very difficult for me. The difficulty may rest with my attitude of needing to be perfect or if not perfect then I become mindless (numb to my errors). I have used so many of Beck's ideas and exercises to work through hurdles to losing weight. The biggie for me was coping with being hungry, really learning if I wait the 20 minutes after a small meal, I truly was not hungry. I cope with more tough emotions with out eating-learned lots of good stuff. What I don't know how to do- is to spontaneously enjoy food in moderation.

There is an aspect of eating which is social, experimentive, fun and spontaneous. Right now I am having difficulty following the check lists because of missing that "fun" of food. I am either trying to be a "perfect" rule follower and or a guilty food indulger with a sense of failure. Both positions are rather hard . I want to learn and trust that I can have some flexibilty with food and the Beck rules and here is the biggie- still be moderate.

Any ideas on how to make this stuff work better for me? I am working on a sabotaging idea? So Bill I don't have much help just my 2 cents on why I understand you sense of conflicting goals.

Big wave to everyone is this changing of our eating habits and relationship to food.

sue

kattharris
01-10-2008, 01:50 PM
I am also new the Becks Solution and so far I have to say that I really like it.
I do not do it as much as I should, but I have managed to complement myself for resisting cookies and other no-cost but not free goodies at work.
I was shocked at how much eating I did on my feet. I have not completely mastered sitting down to eat yet, but at least I realize when I don't do it. The other night I had jst gotten my daughter settled down to eat, but I was going to wait for my husband who was going to be late, so I grabbed a cheese stick and started to eat it before I realized what I was doing. My poor child must have thought that I was crazy, the way that I scrambled to the table! Good luck to everyone, the part that helps me the most so far is recognizing my own sabotaging thoughts, and counteracting them.

BillBlueEyes
01-10-2008, 08:46 PM
:welcome: kattharris, to the Beck discussion group, support group, diet coach group :welcome:

and :wel3fc: in case you haven't been properly welcomed to 3FC already.

At the latitude of Texas, you will help to balance the group; as mentioned above, the geographic center of the current posters is a bit north at the moment.

__________________
XXXXXXX 7 XXXXXXX 14 XXXXXXX 21 XXXXXXX 28 XXXXXXX 35 XXXXXXX 42
Completed Beck Program-day 42. You’ve met your goal. Congratulations!

hbuchwald
01-10-2008, 11:54 PM
Hello there friends,
Welcome kattharris! This is a great support place for people following Beck! Counteracting sabotaging thoughts is one of the biggest ideas in this program that I have found helpful.

Coastalsue: I wonder what Beck woudl say about what you are talking about? Would she say that we are to never enjoy food spontaneously? She talks about adding a predetermined number of calories for eating out or for traveling.... what about general daily life? I really don't feel terribly deprived of food right now for some reason. I do plan one treat each day (for myself and my daughter). That stemmed from me growing up with "NO sugar allowed" type upbringing. My brothers and I would spoon granulated sugar into our mouths when our parents left the house or overate dessert at friends' houses, etc... I think that "dieting" can feel like that. I came into reading Beck from a place where I decided never to diet again..but then didn't have a better alternative. Now, I don't feel like I am "dieting" but really trying to choose the best food from the party to try and then eat really healthfully when on homebase. I dont' know how to overcome feeling the rigidity versus the spontanaeity of food but there must be a balance in there somewhere-we eat have to find our own probably.

I am going to get on that treadmill tonight when my daugther goes to bed! It will feel good to workout again!

Doggie is hanging in there-we dont' have answers yet about why his liver is not functioning. He is scheduled to get an ultrasound and liver biopsy on Tuesday. I am trying to find somewhere to take him before that-he is VERY punky and not eating, etc... We are loving him up and keeping him comfy and trying to stay positive and hopeful.

Til tomorrow, Heidi

BillBlueEyes
01-11-2008, 06:31 AM
Took a walk at lunch yesterday to buy a book - had a 25% off coupon from Boarders. FREE money off gives me the same sort of thrill as FREE food, but without the feeling of loss of control.

Beck hints at the slippery slope when she writes, "Even if you're only eating raw carrots while you're standing up today, you might be eating chocolate while you're standing up tomorrow."


Sue (CoastalSue) - As usual, you nail the dilemma, "There is an aspect of eating which is social, experimentive, fun and spontaneous." I accept and appreciate that I have to give up some MAJOR emotional uses of food like every day comfort and entertainment. Are we being honest with ourselves by trying to continue with occasional uses of food as you describe? I think yes, provided that I can find a way to be accountable to myself that it really is occasional, not just the entrance way to the slippery slope. I would think no if I saw myself as addicted to food and had to avoid the first bite, just like the first snort, or first shot, or first lottery ticket if one had those addictions. Can the Buddhists help lead us to clear thinking here?

Heidi (hbuchwald) - Continue to send best thoughts for your doggie. How is your daughter handling this? Is she attached to the dog?

kattharris - Kudos for resisting cookies and double kudos for giving yourself credit. Like your thought, "no-cost but not free goodies."

Readers - "Cognitive Therapy is a psychological treatment that will help you successfully lose excess weight and keep it off." Beck, pg 25. 

__________________
XXXXXXX 7 XXXXXXX 14 XXXXXXX 21 XXXXXXX 28 XXXXXXX 35 XXXXXXX 42
Completed Beck Program-day 42. You’ve met your goal. Congratulations!

maryblu
01-11-2008, 09:07 PM
Hi, fellow Beckies!

Is that the name that has "stuck"?

I have enjoyed catching up on posts and am so glad we are still gaining more Beckies.

Even though this week has been hectic, and even though I have been violating day 3......and let's not even talk about day 4.......lol.....no, I do want to address that, but another time.

I am trying to figure out if I am really violating the eating sitting down rule more than usual, or if I am just more aware of it since it is our focus this week. The good news is, even though I am doing it, I am keenly aware of it...and I have been able to catch myself at times and decide not to do it. Credit moi....now, I think I had better not credit myself for eating sitting down while sitting in the car...lol

I was thinking about Sue's question on helpful responses for the self-sabotaging about perfection. I am trying to remember who said so wisely, "Progress, not perfection", but it is a helpful response.

That perfection mentality is one of the biggest traps, one of the biggest mistake we make....

Let's brainstorm some helpful responses...OK, we didn't stick to our 1600 cal. plan. We have eaten some mouthfuls of "treats"....rather than thinking, "Oh, well, I will be perfect tomorrow".....

How about, "I ate more than I planned today, but not *that* much...certainly not enough to significantly gain. I can get right back on plan and over time, I can achieve my goal."...not a perfect response, but I do believe over time, these kinds of behaviors become more of a habit.

BillBE is pretty much living proof........not intended to put undue pressure on, friend, but it does seem that you are finding it easier, and more automatic; wouldn't you agree?

I share your passion, CoastalSue, for celebratory eating, eating with friends, etc. Planning ahead to control my eating when going to a party where there are tons and tons of great treats feels like "too much pain"...I think at this point if we could just do as Beck outlines, because "she said so"..that would be wise......just trust it for now.....it doesn't *have* to be forever.....and maybe it will get easier.

I do know that I have finally gotten under enough control to be getting hungry again, and it feels good! It really does...and food, even Kale, tastes really good. (well, if you put enough garlic on it....I can choke most anything down):D

coastalsue
01-12-2008, 12:14 AM
HI guys,

Thanks for the input Maryblu about perfection. I do put alot of internal pressure to meet everyone's expectations, project deadlines, social commitments-ect. I feel like I was raised to be very aware and tuned into and supportive to those around me-made for a good teacher and social worker, but isn't a great background for meeting my own needs. Food was one thing I could do and still stay turned in to others, continue working, even meet need of others by serving foods-starting making the family meal at about 12-13 yrs old. Maybe as I learn to accept not striving to be perfect, I'll meet my own needs better without so much food.

I actually had a good food day as I woke up thinking of my advantage list to lose weight and could think that some of the reason were actually more important today than the "fun" of food. Had no real answers just that it was good for me to post and even think about how much I loved food "fun" inspite of the natural consequences of too many calories.

Heidi-I have been working on adding some planned treats-I think I have done enough Beck and preplanning and recording not to have things become a trigger. In fact after this posting I have a small square of very rich chocolate. How is your Pup doing?

BillBlueEyes-maybe it is that buddhist concept of looking at your attitude and learning that it is just construction of you own mind and not an abstract reality. For me I have give food the power of "fun" and my struggle is learn how to have fun without food. I have done the check list of puzzles-ect not yet motivating enough.

Maybe just acknowledging the role of food as fun-helped me respect the work to change my eating habits. Anyway thanks for everyone for letting carry on about this behavior. I love the act of eating food, but sure tire of the consequences of eating too much. Got to make some more changes to insure weight loss.

Best wishs to you all

sue

eusebius
01-12-2008, 06:00 AM
Hi everyone, just a fly by post. I haven't been posting too much but I am enjoying all your posts and thinking of you all.
Tomorrow is the dreaded day 12 and I want to get the hunger experiment over with, LOL!! as long as I manage without too much caffeine making my stomach go crazy, I should be Ok.
Sue - I totally hear you on the food as fun thing. Well, I love delicious food. i think it IS fun. I find it sometimes tough to remember that i don't need to be getting all my kicks from food. Again it's a thought/mindset shift. this is why Beck is so illuminating for me!
have a great day all,
Erika

BillBlueEyes
01-12-2008, 06:46 AM
Missed my walking due to cold rain yesterday. In the past I've just bundled up and gone out. Yesterday I climbed into my favorite reading chair with a hot cup of tea and read one of my Christmas gift books. Oh Well.

Give Yourself Credit,[/B] I, for one, will be happy to stop thinking about my eating standing up.]


MaryBlu - This perfection thing is one BIG barrier to remaining responsible. Perhaps Beck's Just DO it can be invoked here. If I can recognize that I'm blocked because of a perfectionist Sabotaging Thought, then there's the opportunity for me to think of a Helpful Response. For me, the challenge is to recognize my irresponsible behavior, so that I can consider alternative behaviors rather than to just continue to wallow in it.

And thanks for the kind words. Some things are easier, but in some areas I can see that I'm just over the boarder from the irresponsible behaviors that put on all the weight. It does remain a Sabotaging Thought for me that it SHOULD be easy now. I take comfort in Beck's observation that thin people continue to think about what they eat.


Sue (CoastalSue) - Congratulations on your good food day. And thanks for your thoughts about mindset. I'll have to ponder that my attitude is not an abstract reality. Might help me to step back and see that it's my attitude that need adjusting.


Erika (eusebius) – Good luck on your hunger experiment - can't wait to hear how it worked for you. Perhaps you're onto the path I'm looking for with [I]"i don't need to be getting all my kicks from food." Perhaps if I acknowledge that I had evolved into the mindset of constantly getting my kicks from food, then there's room now to accept that I can get some kicks from food without it being the entrance to the slippery slope.

Heidi (hbuchwald) - Sending best thoughts for your puppy.

Readers - "The way you think about food, eating, and dieting affects your behavior and how you feel emotionally." Beck, pg 25.

__________________
XXXXXXX 7 XXXXXXX 14 XXXXXXX 21 XXXXXXX 28 XXXXXXX 35 XXXXXXX 42
Completed Beck Program-day 42. You’ve met your goal. Congratulations!

maryblu
01-12-2008, 01:16 PM
BillBE, you always get up WAY ahead of me, but, lol....I was thinking this morning before I got out of bed, and for me, often,

If I stay up all night, it'll dawn on me..........:D

I have still been thinking about CoastalSue (and others as well) struggling so hard with the issues of food as fun, food as filling the emotional void, all of that, and I am glad, CoastalSue, you never give up trying to figure it all out.....we have all witnessed alot of tough work on your part; you have been doing alot of heaving lifting emotionally. I feel for you, because that is exhausting, and even though not physical, it takes its toll.

One of the biggest appeals for me with Beck is that it really does just sorta "automate" the process. "Do A, and X will happen. Plan ahead so you can do A; know that you got heavy because you do not regularly do A, so figure out how to overcome those sabotaging thoughts that derail you from doing A."

If we act "as if"..."just do it"....day after day after day.....we will lose weight........If we have to do it one day at a time, so be it...I guess that is always the conventional wisdom anyway, "one day at a time"...

If we think about anything else we decide/make a commitment to do.....we are always advised to start first thing in the morning and focus on our commitment (read our response cards, sort "recommit" every morning)..just for today.....I know that is why BillBE posts first thing every morning....yeah, lol....I figured it out.......lol......it dawned on me..;);)

Erika, glad you are checking in...it is as we discussed before, sometimes we give, sometimes we take what we need because it is freely given.

Heidi, I haven't even been able to bring myself to think about you and your dear pup. We lost one of our two dear dawgs at Thanksgiving, and he was the coolest dawg ever. We still have his daddy, though..12 and 1/2 and still such a happy guy..trotting around, tail up and wagging. He loves the snow! I swear I see him smiling.

Kattharris, hello; I am looking forward to "hearing" your thoughts.

Have a good Beck day, all.

eusebius
01-12-2008, 09:32 PM
WOOHOO I did it, Day 12 hunger experiment :woohoo: Never got worse than about a 2 actually. Then I had cookies AND ice cream for dessert, coming in at my minimum points for the day :) no, I won't be doing that everyday!!
Bill - Curling up with a Christmas gift book sounds pretty darn good right about now. I bought myself the Beck book and "Eat Pray Love" by Elizabeth Gilbert. My yoga teacher quoted it this morning, so I should get busy. Problem is, my friend and flutist/collaborator Patricia lent me "Outlander" which is a good 600 or so pages, so it may take me a while to get to it ...

Maryblu, your words are wise. One day at a time, one thing at a time; with depression, sometimes one second, one movement at a time, all the better if it keeps you mindful of the present moment, which seems so Beck-ish anyway!!

Heidi, still thinking of you and your pup; prayers for you both.

Sue, kattharris and all, hope you are all having a great weekend.

cheers
Erika

hbuchwald
01-13-2008, 02:02 AM
Hello there friends,
I plan to at least do a quick check in each day-I need to keep my head into being a Beckie!

Bottom line, they think that Henry has hepatitis. They wanted to hospitalize him but I chose to bring him home after being pumped with antibiotics and vitamins intravenously at the hospital. He gets LOTS of meds here but can be with us and in his comfort place. He is keeping the meds down which is GREAT but the true test will be when he gets a blood test tomorrow or the next day to see if there is any progress being made. Yesterday was the ultrasound and that was a long day (emotionally and physically...for me too!).

As far as how I am doing...for several days, I was not eating enough calories but I didn't feel like eating much. Tonight, I got ahold of some chips and am now forgiving myself for indulging. They tasted good but it was so weird to be in that feeding frenzy place in my mind (and mouth and stomach, etc..). In a strange way, it felt good to be reminded about how bad it feels to overeat so much. I was NOT paying attention to hunger or my reasons for losing weight, etc.. it was rebellious and felt out of control but then I stopped and am now drinking water and trying to be gentle with myself.

Credit moi for: cooking some healthy and delicious soup (from Cooking Light-Chickpea, tomato and spelt-it is tasty!), and keeping some of that pasta/veggie number that I make in the fridge. I have also planned out dinner for the week including cooking 2 new dishes with plans for leftovers for lunch. I am also scheduling exercise in for the week. I have been slacking on reading my ARCs and am getting back to it. I like how I feel being lighter/healthier than I was...I would like to continue on my path.

Bill BE asked about my daughter's bond with Henry...she thinks of him as her brother. I have presented it as him being very sick and we are doing everything that we can for him. We are going to appreciate him, love him, keep him comfortable and hope that he can heal. He might die soon. She is so wise for her 5 years and tells me that crying won't make him feel better, etc.. She hugs him and talks to him but is not freaking out or anything. She did yell at him the other day, "Henry!" and then brought her voice to a sweet and soft voice, "Henry, I love you and I don't want you to die..but your head is tickling my leg and I don't like that...".

Sorry about all the dog talk on the Beck list... it is what I am dealing with and what is on my mind.

Onward and forward! Til tomorrow, Heidi

BillBlueEyes
01-13-2008, 08:08 AM
Walked big time (24k steps) in our California-like, sunny day yesterday. What a joy! CREDIT moi. Acknowledging that I just gave myself credit. CREDIT moi [recursively, LOL].

The Give Yourself Credit strategy helps me to feel the little, daily gains, which helps me to feel being responsible for my actions. It remains a struggle for me against the Sabotaging Thought that it's demeaning. Thanks Heidi for getting us started on Program-day 4. Do others find this difficult?


MaryBlu - You are so good at reducing Beck to its basics; "Do A, and X will happen. Plan ahead so you can do A." Hope you continue to keep us all grounded.

Heidi (hbuchwald) - Hepatitis, Ouch :( Am so touched by your daughter's sweet words to Henry; that's a lot of wisdom for a 5 year old. Keeping all of you in my thoughts as you administer the medications and await the blood tests.

Double kudos for keeping your head clear about eating during such difficult emotional times. You seem to be spot on with your response to get back on track after the chips. Thanks for the demo of great Beck form there.

And I'll be by for a bowl of that Chickpea, tomato, spelt soup. WOW.


Erika (eusebius) – Kudos for completing your hunger experiment. Isn't it mind boggling that you only felt discomfort up to level 2 (out of 0-10)!!! What a lesson to learn about hunger. Kudos to Beck for designing that exercise.

Sue (CoastalSue) - Waving. Hope you continue to remain on plan.

Readers - "Certain ways of thinking make it difficult to follow a diet and to maintain weight loss." Beck, pg 25.

__________________
XXXXXXX 7 XXXXXXX 14 XXXXXXX 21 XXXXXXX 28 XXXXXXX 35 XXXXXXX 42
Completed Beck Program-day 42. You’ve met your goal. Congratulations!

coastalsue
01-13-2008, 01:26 PM
Hello All,

Heidi, You are raising a very wise and compassionate daughter-Hope the that Henry will soon recover.

Ok Bill you keep having better weather than our "sunny" calif. Actually we have been very cold, rainy or foggy. On a rather dreary day, I told a tourist it was sunny because I could see a hint of shadows on the ground. She laughed but since it has been so cloudy even a hint of shadows is sunny to me. So glad you can keep walking outdoors.

I am finally worked out my current my food plan. I plan to reserve a "fun" calorie count 3-4 day a week. I'll preplan the majority of the food for each day, record each bite but now have an allowance of calories for fun, spontaneous treats on some days. I am trusting that my desire to lose will ensure that I maintain an honest evaluation of my spontaneous bites. It is bit unbeck-But since I have been losing over a year, I am trusting my skills to limits overindulgence but will be including some portions of the calories for mindful, spontaneous, enjoyed and most importantly a modest amount of treats. I have taken off 3 lbs of regained weight from the holidays, so I am hopeful this will work for me.

This is my current experiment-can only do it and see if I am successful but I am happier having this small of stash of "unplanned calories yet accountable calories" and am starting to lose weight again. I thank Heidi for the story of the kids eating straight sugar once it became forbidden.

Like the line from a song from Kiss my Kate- But I am always true to you (Ms Beck) in my fashion.

Thanks to everyone is responding to my struggles-especially you MaryBlu-I have had to work hard-as many of us do- to release the traumas/pains of of the past for which food as served as a misguided attempt to self comfort.

many thanks to all and good food thoughts
sue

maryblu
01-13-2008, 01:35 PM
Greetings, Beckies.

I think we are all seeing progress with Beck..some within ourselves, and thanks to the forthright postings, we are witnessing it in our fellow Beckies as well.

Heidi: "it was so weird to be in that feeding frenzy place in my mind (and mouth and stomach, etc..). In a strange way, it felt good to be reminded about how bad it feels to overeat so much. I was NOT paying attention to hunger or my reasons for losing weight, etc.. it was rebellious and felt out of control but then I stopped and am now drinking water and trying to be gentle with myself."


Credit, you! That awareness is progress.

Erika, waaaaaaaaaaaaaayyyyy credit you! I had an opportunity to skip lunch because I was way past lunch time, and I was so hungry, I caved...I thought about doing it for a minute, but maybe it is because I hadn't planned it as my "assignment"........dunno, but I could have had that one checked off the list...oh, well, day 12 approaches.

Heidi, I am glad you are keeping dear Henry at home. It seems to me even more important to keep your pets with you for healing than your family, 'cuz you can at least explain to a person that he/she is better off in the hospital (Perhaps). So sorry your daughter has to learn this life lesson so young; wow, she sounds wise (and patient) beyond her years. Credit, you.

I was really loathe to discuss day 4, choosing a diet and back-up, because it seems that we (the collective we on this site, but dieters in general, too) focus so much on food, diets, limits..can I "have" this, am I "allowed" this. ..that mentality and that perfection mentality is such a trap...I am thinking of a slogan....

It's not the diet.......

"It's the behavior, stupid"

How is that?? :)

hbuchwald
01-13-2008, 08:24 PM
24k???WOWWWW! That is a lot of walking BillBE! Kudos to you!

My dad came over today and took us to lunch and then we went to the park and he, my daughter and I played basketball, walked around the school (daughter rode bike) and played tag. Nothing like playing tag with a little kid to get us all moving and laughing.... it felt great. I am in WA and WE are even having the sunny weather today (sorry Sue!). Usually we are the ones saying that it is bikini weather when it is 60 degrees out. The sun affects me physically so it felt so good to get out into it!

I ate a bit unplanned since we went to lunch. BUT be went to Applebees and they have the new WW menu going on and I chose the tilapia since I don't get much fish into our diets and it sounded good. I feel good about it and am now replanning dinner based on what I ate at lunch. I still feel good about my plan and the tilapia was mediocre. :( Oh Well!

Sue-I love how you are sounding about planning the fun/spontaneous food. Yes, for me, it is so important to balance food out and not make anything forbidden but everything in moderation. I like the food pyramid way to look at it...driven by our bodies' needs and good, balanced and healthy being most important.

Maryblu-thanks for the slogan! I also have such a hard time with "diet" and "good food/bad food" and "allowed food", etc... we are in the driver's seat! I can appreciate looking at a diet plan that has a structure that fits with what I want for myself and my eating. I am not giving the power to the diet-I am choosing the "eating plan" for myself and choosing what I put into my body every single time. It is hard to get away from the other kind of thinking since it is everywhere! I am even more keenly aware of it having a young daughter. I want her to love her body, care enough about herself to feed it good food and enjoy a good treat periodically. I don't want her taking in all of the ideas around "thinner is better". I am attempting to tell her and, most importantly, model to her, that "healthy is better" and "balanced is better".... it is really tough though in this culture!

Quick dog report: Henry seems to be acting more perky! He was so excited to see my dad which is more his typical behavior. No clue if that means anything until we get blood test tomorrow. I find myself even telling him that he is healing his liver.... visualize the cells regenerating Henry.. :) It is to help me feel better of course but it can't hurt!

Til tomorrow, Heidi

eusebius
01-13-2008, 09:04 PM
Heidi - such good thoughts about your daughter and modeling for her. How old is she? Mine is 4, I figure it's never too early, since it's sadly pretty common for 8-year-olds to go on diets these days :( Glad to hear Henry is doing better and i will continue to pray for him!!!

maryblu - thanks!! I am sure you will do the experiment when the time comes. Love your slogan!!!

Sue - great idea to have some calories reserved for spontaneity ... you are doing so well, i am sure this will fit into your plan just fine!

Bill - major credit à toi (c'est correct de tutoyer??) for your great walk. how long is 24K steps? Long enough i'm sure LOL!!

Well, I had a bit of a rough day -- not diet wise thanks to ms. beck -- but depression wise. I have been looking into applying the cBT techniques to the rest of my life. I knew about them before but they just seemed a bit shallow ... you know, pat answers for everything ... but I think they can really complement the yoga and meditation techniques I already use.

Wishing everyone a great week (and weighin!)
Erika

BillBlueEyes
01-14-2008, 05:54 AM
Off on a four day business trip. Before I began my journey on a healthy lifestyle some 28 months ago, I would have looked forward to the eating, i.e. over-eating. Now, I'm spending time emotionally formulating my meal plan for long evenings with guys from work starting with FREE appetizers at the hotel's happy hour, followed by robust dinners at chain restaurants (like Red Lobster) that always include drinks, appetizers, coffee, and desserts. Mornings will start at the hotel's FREE breakfast buffet. Lunches will be at a cafeteria of many choices. Some 10 restaurant meals, some 12 snacks away from my stash of soy nuts and apples. (It's telling that even though all of my meal expenses are reimbursed, it's the FREE food that draws my attention.)

If you will kindly keep your support for my eating plan in your thoughts this week, I'll feel that and report my eating back here to my online diet coaches (over the hotel's FREE web connection, LOL).


Sue (CoastalSue) - Kudos for your thoughtful food plan that includes planned treats. I'm so grateful that you're attacking the issue of retaining some of the fun of food while remaining on plan. Looking forward to hearing how it works.


MaryBlu - Love the slogan, "It's the behavior, stupid." Will add that to my Response Cards. And good news for you; talking about choosing diets is back on Program-day 2. That's over, all done. We're now on "Give Yourself Credit." Would you care to publicly give yourself credit for your focus on staying on plan and your thoughtful contributions to the group in your postings?


Heidi (hbuchwald) - Kudos for ordering tilapia at Applebee's. It does call for extra lemon juice or something since it's a bit bland on its own - it ain't salmon, LOL. Good news about Henry, will continue to send positive thoughts awaiting the blood tests.


Erika (eusebius) – Kudos for dealing with rough days without using food. It's encouraging to hear that your success with Beck makes using CBT in other areas more acceptable, since I'm hoping to use CBT on my clutter. And thank you for "major credit ŕ toi (c'est correct de tutoyer??)" (Oui!!). 24k steps is 12+ miles; it was four different walks, just basking in the unusual California-like January day.


Readers - "The Beck Diet Solution takes you through a six week process to change sabotaging thoughts (that cause you to stray from your diet) to helpful thinking (that will lead to success)." Beck, pg 25.

__________________
XXXXXXX 7 XXXXXXX 14 XXXXXXX 21 XXXXXXX 28 XXXXXXX 35 XXXXXXX 42
Completed Beck Program-day 42. You’ve met your goal. Congratulations!

SuchAtwin
01-14-2008, 11:02 AM
Maryblu: LOVE the slogan.
BillBE: You continue to be a walking inspiration.
Heidi, Sue: You both inspire me.
Waving at Ann and Cammie. I miss your posts.
It is a beautiful day here in Houston. I plan to make the most of it with yard piddling, bird watching, sun soaking.
Beck's suggestions are finally working for me. I lost 1.5 lbs for the week and feel determined to continue working on the behavior. Happy Monday everyone.

SPIRITANGEL
01-14-2008, 03:08 PM
Hello Fellow Beckers from Nashville TN!

I'm a newie but I really believe the Beck diet is the best thing for me.

I'm a bad binger. Does anyone suffer from binge eating?????
I hope the Beck principles will work for me.
Thank you all for being here.
Yeeeeeha Spiritangel

maryblu
01-14-2008, 09:57 PM
Beckies!

Yay..we have another new member. Welcome SPIRITANGEL. I think you will find as you read Beck, there are many, many applications of CBT to binging. You will do the Advantages Response Cards to constantly remind yourself of what is in it for you personally losing the weight. And you will craft your own responses to counteract the urges. On pg. 26 of her book, you will see:

"The Thought Comes First

You may not be conscious of it, but you always have a thought before you eat..."

The idea, then is to find the helpful responses to talk yourself out of it. I don't mean to make light of this; if it were easy, none of us would need to be "studying" Beck.

Erika, CBT can help with depression! In fact, it was first used for treating depression. If you have the book, read Dr. Aaron Beck's forward; he addresses this on page 10. I understand what you are saying about it seeming pat, and you all know that is the part I love..the just do it part...I am not making light of this at all, but I keep going back to finding that people who get the botox injections to get rid of frown lines get happier! They stop frowning, cuz they can't and they get happier......it may be they look happier and people respond to them accordingly, but it is apparently true!

BillBE...well, yeah, OK.....creidt moi for whatever it is you said ...lol....actually, I am pretty proud of myself to have found 2 helpful passages from Beck tonight.:D:D

Regards to all; I echo the sentiment that we miss Ann and Cammie..and Nighthawk, are you circling around out there? You must be nocturnal; we can't see you!:?:

hbuchwald
01-15-2008, 12:59 AM
Hi there friends,
Erika-my daughter is 5. Yes, it is scary how young some girls now are concerned with their weight. I teach 5th and 6th grade and I see it in some of those kids. :( I have experienced CBT helping depression! In a therapy session, in my experience anyway, it wasn't as structured as this book/program for eating. The therapist would respond certain ways to what I was sharing about and, over time, I began to think differently. Brainwashing? No-but it sort of sounds like it the way I explained it! :)

BillBlueeyes: Good luck on your "free trip". That is a huge challenge! Restaurants, FREE food, away from the routine, possible peer pressure??? Bring those cards! :) We will be thinking about you and hoping that there is some yummy and free food that is something you want to eat on your plan. My mom lives in Boston...she LOVES the cold weather -good to know that there will be lots of snow there. We just got a dusting here...

SuchaTwin: thanks for the compliments. Keep up your hard work! I love it when the scale shows some evidence of my body changing.. same feeling with a loose waistband or shirt that bags over that didn't use to, etc... NICE!

Welcome Spiritangel: yes, the strategies here will work for most any behavior that a person wants to change.

Maryblu: Thanks for your thoughts-you always give great insight. I definitely appreciate the quotes from the book that you and Bill provide..

Doggie seems like he is improving!!! I am THRILLED about it (and exhausted still from it all). Test results will be back in a few days but overall, he is feeling better and the vet thinks that he is looking better as well.

Credit moi: read my cards today (aloud and with feeling! :) ), drank plenty of water, ate on plan, gave SOME credit to self. I need to exercise... what do I say to myself? "I am really tired.... I deserve to go to bed early and get some sleep." Response: I have decided that I want to take good care of myself and my body needs to move. No Choice. Sounds cheesy but whatever works huh? Tomorrow is Tuesday.. I will do a video or the treadmill for 20 minutes. It is now in my calendar scheduled in.

Til tomorrow, Heidi

coastalsue
01-15-2008, 02:58 AM
Helllo everyone,

Just a short note-we have had some roving power outages plus our local server has had a lot of trouble today, -bottom line just could not post anything today until now. I had written on day 4 and lost it, so will try again tomarrow.

BillBlueEyes-hope the free food extravaganza is not too temping. I know you have some excellent skills which you have master so well during the last 6 months-plus while free- chain restaurant and hotel breakfast food just are not up to your dinning standards! Hang in there!! You are the guy who likes $45.00 a lb cheese.

Maryblu-Love how you are really getting into and sharing the messages in the Beck Book. Just got my copy back and will soon join you. Here is one hard point for me-While I agree that a thought does come first, I have become a master of hiding them from my consciousness. My friend asked me what my sabotaging thoughts about eating slowly-I honestly don't feel I have any because I am so delighted when I remember to eat much more slowly. I actually like to eat more demure versus like a lumberjack who been starving for days.

Erika-depression is a difficult feeling which can make everyday tasks even harder. I agree in the power of meditation, along with exercising you-yoga, me -swimming. I have occassionally used meds along with therapy at really tough times. A book which I have found helpful is "the Mindful Way through Depression" by Williams, Teasdale,Segal and Kabat-Zinn. It kind of a cross of meditation and cognitive therapy. Good luck in find the right tools for you.

SuchATwin-great success using Beck to lose some weight. Ain't easy after all the holiday to return to eating moderation.

Welcome SpiritAngel This is a good spot to work io the skills to not binge and eating more like the thins.

Heidi- great news about the pup. Much Kuddos for doing the exercising. I have taught and raised a family know that feeling of being so mind tired yet not have moved and exercised. Tomarrow I am meeting a friend at 8 o'clock at the outdoor pool to swim. Burrr is my main concern. It is in the 50's that time of day.

Right now my food plan with a bit of calories for impluse food is working well for me. Little impluse food in the house, but have gone to coffee and had a treat, had a bit of stuff at work, ect. While I do plan each day menu and record every bite, I just don't feel so restricted. So far so good about not triggering a binge or mindless eating pattern. Quite a learning process to figure out what is going to be the right long term food plan for myself.

a wave to everyone
sue

BillBlueEyes
01-15-2008, 05:39 AM
:welcome: SPIRITANGEL :welcome:

And, in case you haven't received a proper one: :wel3fc:

Welcome to the Beck Diet Solution discussion group, support group, diet coach group.

Feel free to jump right in, say to post a few top items on your Advantages Response Card - or all of it - to let us get to know you.

Waving all the way to Tennessee. :wave:

__________________
XXXXXXX 7 XXXXXXX 14 XXXXXXX 21 XXXXXXX 28 XXXXXXX 35 XXXXXXX 42
Completed Beck Program-day 42. You’ve met your goal. Congratulations!

BillBlueEyes
01-15-2008, 07:03 AM
Diet Coaches: - Boston area snow caused my flight to be canceled, so my trip is postponed two days until Thursday; kindly shift your good thoughts accordingly, LOL.

The snow was beautiful - wet snow that covered branches and made post card like scenes. And then broke limbs of trees from the weight. I saw bad damage to a neighbor's Dogwood tree, sad. However, I took a vacation day so that I could shovel wet snow all day rather than frantically shovel in the evening as it was freezing - a good strategy. I had a pleasant day; the sun was out. I worked my arms better than a gym session. CREDIT moi. With a straight face DW insisted that there wasn't a single gram of edible food in the house since I wasn't expected for dinner, so we walked to a Bangladesh Restaurant. Split Goat Korma, Bangladesh vegetables, basmati rice, and a Mango Lassi (mango, yogurt, milk shake). Good walk; great meal; on plan; good practice for my upcoming traveling. CREDIT moi.

Sue (CoastalSue) - Sounds like the planned calories for "impulse food" is working so far - great, congratulations. Smart plan that you're keeping the impulse food out of the house.

MaryBlu - Kudos to you for accepting my kudos and for acknowledging that you're pretty good at helping us on this board. Is giving yourself credit somewhat difficult for you?

Kitt (SuchAtwin) - Congratulations for your weight loss and for making Beck work for you. Are you backyard bird watching or heading out to a special place?

Heidi (hbuchwald) - Thanks for introducing the word "brainwashing." That's one of my more powerful Sabotaging Thoughts to bag the whole Beck approach; it motivates me to construct a Helpful Response: CBT is a recognized approach to be respected. Negative thoughts are a common attempt to denigrate ALL personal achievements; ignore them.

Great news about Henry. Hope he continues to improve. Of course you're exhausted, so kudos for you for keeping your focus during emotional and physically trying times.


SPIRITANGEL - I share your hope that the Beck strategies work for you - they're working for a bunch of us.

Readers - "Any reasonable diet will work for you if you have the right mindset." Beck, pg 19.
__________________
XXXXXXX 7 XXXXXXX 14 XXXXXXX 21 XXXXXXX 28 XXXXXXX 35 XXXXXXX 42
Completed Beck Program-day 42. You’ve met your goal. Congratulations!

SPIRITANGEL
01-15-2008, 05:20 PM
Wow! Thanks so much for my welcome. I never got that on the OA board.
You Sheilas are mighty inspiring. I've been listening to the Beck Diet Solution audio cd. I got it off itunes and I really love it. I listen to it while I go for a walk around the block.

I really believe in CBT! I'm setting my goal of 5 pounds and am going to reward myself with a new haircut. I really hope this works for me. I got married four months ago and have been binge eating badly.
Once I start- I tell myself that I can't stop until I'm stuffed.

I'm so tired of the thought that 'I've blown it now I may aswell just blow the whole day and stuff myself'-----------This type of thinking has got me fat, made me depressed etc......

Thanks so much for the welcome again.
I look forward to getting to know you all.
Blessings
Spiritangel x

coastalsue
01-15-2008, 05:29 PM
Morning to all,

It is behavior s.t.u.p.i.d. I like this motto Maryblu. I changed it to s.t.u.p.i.d. to Sticking to useful program is daily.

Just got my book back so I am attempting to review day 4. To learn to give oneself credit. Why-build your confidence . For me it is undo years of feeling helpless after regaining weight after getting off many strict but “miracle” diet.

Remember every time you are self critical- you undermine your confidence

How to give your self credit
While the act of giving myself credit is very hard for me, if I reframe it to the act of giving credit to building my confidence to be healthy then it is much easier for me.

Beck has some of the following ways to increase giving yourself credit.

Acknowledge your good choices with phrase-great!, I did it ( I am more likely to say great healthy choice!!, your joints will like that choice, Here’s to shrinking fat cells!!. I like visualize healing versus just being a "good" girl.
Reading a response card-stating give yourself credit for the what you did during the day.
Checking off to-do lists
Putting pennies in a container for each positive behavior you acknowledge
Treat yourself like you would your best friend talking about his/her successes and failures.-aknowledgement and support. Words to increase confidence and not to undermine their abilities.

Why is this hard- what are your reasons?

My two biggies are
1. This feels childish
Helpful -This is working on the permanent weight loss by acknowledging my changes.

2. I don’t deserve credit- If I make any food “mistakes” during the day.
Helpful- I read that we make an average of 200 food choices each day. I made a heck of lot of good ones. Beating myself up only increase my sense of helplessness. My goal is build my confidence- heck I have done many healthy things today. Change the mistake into a learning prompt on how not to do that again.-

Thanks-doing and posting a chapter really helped me get it. I'll do day5 in a couple of days. I really encourage folks to review a chapter on the forum
it helps focus the thinking.

Met friends and swam today. they are both very active thin folks and I they commented on strong and fast I was in the pool. It felt to good to get any compliments for being physical as I am very slow walker using a cane. I alway feel like I am 20 yrs and 135 lbs in the pool-plus no pain on my joints.


BillBlueEyes-what a great meal-You just can't get such exotic foods at a chain or hotel.( or within 150 miles of where I live) Relish you chances for such a treat. Remember that you so enjoyed it and remained on plan-got alot of excellent behaviors going there. Your trip will be a food success. The Calif weather has left Boston and today we have had a cool but finally a sunny day. I love to look at snow but no longer know how drive nor walk in it.

Big wave to everyone
sue

eusebius
01-16-2008, 12:09 AM
Hi everyone,

Not too bad of a day today. Got up early and did yoga; stuck to plan. credit moi! i am on day 15 right now - monitor your eating - which I was doing anyway, but it's quite powerful combined with day 14 - plan your food in advance. So I just enter the choices in my online WW tracker the night before and then - NO CHOICE! simple yet brilliant.

SuchATwin - Congrats and major credit to you for your 1.5-pound loss!!! I am so happy that the suggestions are working for you!! :woohoo:

Welcome SPIRITANGEL! I have done the binge thing and I know that for me it is not really about the food. I think these guidelines are just the thing ... but then of course for me it's also addressing the underlying issues ... am hoping CBT will work for that as well.

MaryBlu - So true, just do it!! fake it till you make it, as it were. Overthinking is certainly what got me into this mess in the first place.

Heidi - Kudos for a great day and great to hear that Henry is doing better!! V. interesting approach by your therapist re: 'brainwashing' ... I like it <g> sneaky yet effective!!

sue - I have just bought that book you suggested ... thank you!! I have been a big Kabat-Zinn fan for years and I recognize some of his techniques on the meditation CD. One thing I am concerned about though. An hour a day!!!!! I do realize that I have to make my mental health a priority ... but I am already getting up super early to do yoga, etc., practising 2+ extra hours a day for this concerto, taking time to record my food, plan meals, eat slowly, post here ... and I already don't watch TV at all!! I can see that it is important but I am concerned that I will overwhelm myself with daily must-dos and end up in the pit again ... any suggestions???

I really admire how you take this process so seriously and thoughtfully ... your posts are much appreciated!

Bill - Kudos to you for keeping up healthy eating and exercise on yr trip!! Way to go!

Anyway, sleep is priority #1 now so off i go. have a great wednesday all,
Erika
p.s. shout out to Ann and Lori , my fellow canucks ... hope you are doing well!

maryblu
01-16-2008, 12:51 AM
Can you feel it? I can. It's partly picking up new Beckie friends, and partly we seem to be really getting serious. A little success goes along way, and shared success is the best!

BillBE, wherever did you get the idea that I have trouble giving myself credit??Moi? Little ol' moi? CoastalSue said it all for me! Everything she said. And speaking of CoastalSue, friend, even though the thought does come first, boy, I couldn't have said it any better:

"While I agree that a thought does come first, I have become a master of hiding them from my consciousness."

You nailed it exactly. Just exactly. We do have the thought, though, and more awareness now, and many of us have said, if we can just stop for a moment, anything that can buy us a little time to think through a helpful response, it does get easier.

Thanks to all for the great thoughts and support.

BillBlueEyes
01-16-2008, 06:52 AM
Diet Coaches - This afternoon starts the rescheduled trip. DW "found" some lentils last night so we had her really wonderful dal with nan (curried lentils with Indian flat bread). Some on-plan eating is soooooo much better than some of my previous meat-centric eating. "Here's to starving my fat cells." Did my reduced gym sets, pushing myself by extending the reps to get a little muscle burn. Rewarded myself with a protein shake because those of us building muscle (LOL) need the extra protein. CREDIT moi.

Sue (CoastalSue) - Thanks for the review of Give Yourself Credit. I was struck by the thought of taking credit for the majority of 200 food decisions in the day, rather than beating myself up for the "mistakes". I just love the image of your proficiency in the water and receiving the compliments for it. Kudos to you.

MaryBlu - The idea is more visible after you write it, "anything that can buy us a little time to think through a helpful response." It's like the old count to ten before yelling at your kids kind of thing. Perhaps it's a similar ponder for ten before putting anything in my mouth to give my brain time to ask if I'm about to eat to solve a hunger problem. At the sight of food my brain tends to go Homer Simpson, do-nuts, LOL.

Heidi (hbuchwald) - Thinking about you, your wise 5 year old, and Henry.

Erika (eusebius) – Kudos to you; kudos are due for every day on plan. The issue you raise about adding too many "daily must-dos" events in the day reminds me how drummers can quiet a chanting crowd at concerts - they drive the crowd to chant faster and faster until they all stop from exhaustion. Must remember that making choices is part of my life, even when I'm choosing between multiple good for me and should be high priority activities. I am capable of beating myself up for not going to the gym even though it was a day that I spent many hours shoveling snow - a high priority responsibility as well as a terrific arm exercise. I'm also aware that if I spend too much time on Beck and food thinking that I'm capable of dropping out rather than just decreasing the time. Last thought: working this might help me with my clutter issue. I was struck once when I read that the difficulty of downsizing possessions isn't just getting rid of the useless clutter that never should have been saved, but in choosing between two cherished, valuable items when you only have room for one.

SPIRITANGEL - You're the first person who has reported listening to Beck on an iPod while walking; what a neat way to do it. Good insight to see the need to counter the Sabotaging Thought that a "mistake" justifies ditching the whole day. What Helpful Responses might work for you in that situation?

Readers - "Whether you’re depressed or content, a stay-at-home or working parent, a binge eater or social eater, a dieting novice or dieting pro, the Beck Diet Solution can help you." Beck, pg 22.

__________________
XXXXXXX 7 XXXXXXX 14 XXXXXXX 21 XXXXXXX 28 XXXXXXX 35 XXXXXXX 42
Completed Beck Program-day 42. You’ve met your goal. Congratulations!

SuchAtwin
01-16-2008, 10:18 AM
Fell out of plan, off the wagon, ran off in a ditch…how do you say en Francais… stupido. I mention the negative here for the sake of analysis. Here is what happened. After a long day at work, I met my husband at a local restaurant for dinner where we proceeded to order and consume big hamburgers and French fries. If I could rewind the event and listen to myself my thoughts were something like this, “ I deserve this. I worked hard today, chose wisely earlier, I am starving and I don’t care.” Plus, Bill, get this, it was free thanks to a gift card. Beckies, watch out for those freebies. There must be a bad seed element in getting something for free. Anybody remember “The Bad Seed” movie? In a conversation with myself I could have said: “ You have done well and you should feel good. Will you feel good 10 mins. after you leave your plan?” (Credit that thought to Beck—Chapter 16.) “You can enjoy a beer, hamburger patty with cheese and mushrooms and a salad. Your satisfaction with yourself will feel better than less than satisfactory French fries tastes.” I am grateful for the sunset and sunrise, for a new day and another chance.
Did I welcome you, Spirit Angel? Hello. You deserve big credit for setting a goal and a reward. Think of that as gas in your tank.
Sue: LOVE the anagram--especially the last initial which you made stand for "daily". Life and choices are daily and we all will do well to remember that.
Maryblu: yeah, if we could just "stop for a moment". I am thinking I need to visualize one of Erika's yoga poses where I can breath and release long enough to gather a positive thought when in those tempting free public food situations. Bill: thanks for sharing your exotic food choices as they sound interesting enough to challenge me to look for new happy and healthy eating opportunities. Erika: I admire your disciplined approach to planning your day. By the way, I read your blog site and really enjoyed it. Knitting is a great way to keep the mind and the hands away from food.
Waving to the non-posting for the moment Beckies!

hbuchwald
01-17-2008, 12:28 AM
Sue: I am going to check out the book you recommended about depression. VERY good that you are finding a plan that is working. It is so smart to plan a bit of the spontaneous stuff to avoid the feeling of deprivation. Brrrr is right –double credit to you for swimming in the COLD!

BillBlueEyes: I am making the card for the “brainwashing” idea too…wise response to it! Thanks for the support about my dog!

Spiritangel: great idea to listen to the book while walking! Yes, “blowing the whole day” is a thought that most of us have come to act on in the past. There is a part of the book where she spells out eating one high calorie item…then adds on the next high calorie item, etc.. and then she adds up all the calories and it is obviously not pretty and seems so illogical to binge after eating one unplanned thing after reading that part (at least for me). Easier to read when we are not sitting there with the munchies or with tempting food in front of us!

Sue (again since I am now responding as I read...): Thanks for going over Day 4! It is a great reminder-200 food choices each day? Yes, we are all doing really well! I am truly impressed that you swam but mostly enjoyed reading how good you feel in the pool. :)

Maryblu: Yes, the momentum we all are experiencing is GREAT. This group has such wonderful energy.

NOthing really to speak of here... just doing my thing and coming down from being in some serious anxiety about my dog. Now I am giving him 15 pills per day and enjoying all the little things he is doing that is "back to what he normally would do". Hoping that momentum continues! I did some step aerobics last night and will hop on the treadmill tonight. LOVE that feeling of post exercise. Shoveling snow sounds like a bear of a job but what a workout! I am still enjoying some of the yummy food I cooked this weekend-credit moi.

Til tomorrow, Heidi

Karina
01-17-2008, 12:29 AM
Hi All,
Less than 2 months to go on my pregnancy and then I'll be back to join you! Unlike my last pregnancy where I gained nearly 70 lbs :o, this time I hope to keep it around 40 (already up 30, so we'll see). I think the Beck plan really helped me with not losing total control this time around, although I certainly have eaten wayyyy too many cookies to consider it a total success! I am totally confident that I can get back on track right away and look forward to getting to know those of you who have joined since July.

Sue--I'm so happy to see you've had such success over the past 7 months! You are such an inspiration to me, and I can't wait to chat with you more in just a few months!

Take care, and I'll be back soon! :D

BillBlueEyes
01-17-2008, 07:57 AM
Diet Coaches - Good news: dinner at Ranch 1 at the airport was tasty grilled chicken over greens - on plan. GREAT NEWS: snack on both flights was baby carrots and a small Gala apple from my briefcase. I refused the airline's little baggies of FREE nibbles for the first time in my life. TWICE. A major motivation was just thinking that I could report that to my diet coaches. So, thanks to you all for being here. And, ta da, CREDIT moi.Sabotaging Thought: You are Wimp One for making a big deal of a 100 calorie snack pack.
Helpful Response: Who cares. Refusing FREE food from an airline is a step in my journey toward responsible eating.


Sue (CoastalSue) - Duh. I didn't catch the cleverness of your "s.t.u.p.i.d." until Kitt (SuchAtwin) pointed it out. Nice.

MaryBlu - Kudos to you again. (Someone has to do it, LOL)

Kitt (SuchAtwin) - Ouch!! Sorry that FREE food gets under your radar also. Thanks for sharing such clarity about your thinking in a hypothetical conversation with yourself.

Heidi (hbuchwald) - Glad that Henry remains alert; will continue to send positive thoughts.

SPIRITANGEL - Just thinking about how exciting it is to get started on Beck. Have you worked up an initial Advantages Response Card?

Karina - Hi Karina. It's great to see another contributer to the first Beck thread, The Beck Diet Solution - support group? (http://www.3fatchicks.com/forum/showthread.php?t=112274), from months before I even discovered 3FC. You guys on that thread inspired me to take Beck seriously. Congrats on your pregnancy - wishing you continued success.

Readers - "You’ll get to the point where you react differently when you see food you know you shouldn’t eat." Beck, pg 24.

__________________
XXXXXXX 7 XXXXXXX 14 XXXXXXX 21 XXXXXXX 28 XXXXXXX 35 XXXXXXX 42
Completed Beck Program-day 42. You’ve met your goal. Congratulations!

eusebius
01-17-2008, 10:49 AM
Hi everyone. Just taking time out from my practising to check in.

So far so good. Today is day 17, "end overeating" day. I will be putting extra in my pasta plate at dinner tonight and stopping when I'm full. Nice! Amazingly, I am getting results with this plan even though I'm not doing cardio or strength right now ... "just" yoga - but every day, religiously, with a 90-min class on Saturdays.

Maryblu - So true, I am loving the momentum of this group! Credit to all!!

Bill - Credit to you for keeping up the healthy eating and exercise - both planned and spontaneous! I *love* Indian food. Dal with nan sounds just scrumptious to me.

You have great thoughts about choosing between important activities. I studied for a weekend at Kripalu with the Buddhist teacher Tara Brach. One night she was lecturing, but there was also a concert/presentation about the effect of yoga on classical music performance ... a major, major interest for me. I presented her with my dilemma, and she said: "Abandon yourself to your choice." Wiser words were never spoken!! I went to the concert and have never regretted it.

SuchAtwin - Thanks for visiting my blog :) I really have to update it!! I'm just about to finish a pair of socks so that will probably be the next entry. Ah, burgers and fries. Even worse: FREE burgers and fries. You are wise in your response to the event - a new sunrise and a new day gives us all a new chance!

Heidi - Continued good thoughts to you and Henry. Kudos to you for your advance-cooked yummy food and your dedication to exercise!!!

Karina - Hi there ;) I gained 65 with my pregnancy so I understand completely the desire to keep it lower this time. Best wishes for a wonderful third trimester & birth experience!

OK, back to the second movement. I wish this headache would go AWAY!!!! Gee, could all this time on the computer (Australian Open, Canadian figure skating nationals ....) have anything to do with it? Nahhhhh ....

cheers
Erika

coastalsue
01-17-2008, 08:55 PM
Hello eveyone,

This is day 2 of glorious sun-flat calm pacific ocean-stunning. The entire little burg is in such a good mood-sitting out side, walking -nice break from the winter storms. Stores even stocking ice cream again.

This Beck stuff is working for me- I had a horrible last 2 day-was very angry with some close friends along- with fight with DH-came home and announced tonight I was having a cocktail (or else) Got my diet drink, did some computer work and completely forgot to have drink, even felt the bad mood pass, -Big Hurray for me for changing an ingrained habit-not just white knuckling it, but just plain forgot to have a drink or to overeat- another favorite tension reducer. Plus I managed to lose .8 of lb even while upset for 2 days. credit-saved much needed brain cells-reduced fat cells.

Erika, read you concerns of how to balance all the time needed in order do time consuming but helpful practices. Loved the idea of abandon your self to your choice. I tend be to a slow intergrated of new actions into my live- I keep the successful-and add bits of some new stuff. I did not add more meditate, yet the book gave me some great concept which I bring up when upset. My life is like a silent motion picture and I add all the dialogue-got to watch what I put in the script. Also to understand rummination (a common late night practice) was very helpful. It seemed to deal with depression without so much value judgements. Anything which helps me stop focusing on my "mistakes" or "failures" is a big help for me. Hope you like the book Heidi. Erika, I also don't have any TV-cancelled it 2 yrs ago and thought I have all this time for crafts and reading-so don't know where the time goes-few books or projects done in the last 2 years.

Heidi, to have a some calories each day for spontaneous eating has been a hugh help for me. Thanks!! It actually add a bit adventure for me to the day. So far it has not been a trigger but actually I put more thought into how I am going to spend the calories. So i am less impulsive. Kind like the kid in the candy store who only has $0.75 to spend and make a slow thought out purchase.

BillBlueEyes-not eating the airline snack-great choice. I found your sabataging thought interesting calling your self a wimp for making a big deal of the snack- I think your appreciation of great food just doesn't include some pathetic snack food made to the specification of free airline food and then stored in hot warehouses for many months. Now, if was some gourmet chocolate-ummm tough choice. Congradulation for sticking to such yummy and healthy foods. I agree posting here adds a sense (in a good way) of being accountable for food choices.

SucATwin-what a great description of going off the food plan. We have all done it! Then being free removed last part of resistance. Yep maybe there is a "bad Seed" to the free food. I do remember that movie-I think that Gregory Peck was the dad. I am going to use the phrase- Is this free the planting of the bad seed? to slow down the haste to consume.

Karina-what a delight to hear from you. Keep us update on your baby. Pretty exciting-all my babies are now close to 40 but we have delightful grandbabies to keep us young.

MaryBlu-what are your techniques to remain conscious around food? In my Buddhist study group we did a great exercise to use our senses-including taste-to be mindful and then I came home and inhaled lunch. Honestly, what does take me to learn this!

How are you doing SpritiAngel?

HI to all the readers.

Remember all of us are smarter together than one of us alone.

sue

maryblu
01-17-2008, 11:27 PM
Hello Dear Beckies,

Quick answer to my dear CoastalSue: "what are your techniques to remain conscious around food?"

It takes Beck; it really does. Before Beck, when I lost my 80#s, I swear it was a gift. I just got full. I just ate less and lost weight. Who knew? Since my relapse, and getting all focused on food again, it takes Beck. It takes those mechanical, black and white, no choice, tried and true behaviors...it is so helpful to know that the BDS works. If you do it, all of it, you will succeed. Wow.

Today I did my day 12.....skip lunch. Didn't plan it, but by 2:00 and no lunch yet and still much running and work to do, I thought what the hay? Even if I didn't plan it, it still counts, right? Hard for me to gauge on a 1-10 scale, but it certainly wasn't a big deal. What am I supposed to do now? hmmmm..
credit moi? hmmmm. More than giving myself credit; I am laughing. I did it!

Will be thinking of Sue and anyone else with weather that is not below zero. We are not forecast to get about zero even in the daytime for at least the next 4 days...20 below at night is one thing, but not above 0 during the daytime is rough. Windchill is worse -40 or so! We are a hardy lot....also Norwegian.....;);)

Great to hear from all..keep in touch! :D

hbuchwald
01-18-2008, 12:58 AM
Hello there friends,
Love the idea of "abandoning yourself for your choice". Sometimes I have so many choices that I end up not doing anything for a short spell (sometimes long spell). Applies to many areas of life.

Great work on that plane Bill!

You guys REALLY inspire me! I really feel like Beck is working for me as well. It is so encouraging to hear others feel the same way-reinforces that these habits we are developing are forever.

Gotta hit the hay-I am exhausted... residual of the emotional energy expenditure that seems to be behind me (I am cautiously optimistic...he SEEMS to be doing a bit better everyday..nothing medical confirms or negates that...). Happy Friday to everyone tomorrow... appreciating all of you and what you share/contribute about yourselves and of course your support of what others are dealing with.

Til tomorrow, Heidi

BillBlueEyes
01-18-2008, 07:15 AM
Diet Coaches - Thanks for all the support. I aced three meals that offered abundant opportunities for mindless eating. At breakfast I ignored the FREE bacon, sausages, pastries galore. At lunch I accepted the large cornbread muffin and left 2/3 of it on the plate - an UNUSUAL behavior for me. At dinner I skipped the offered pot stickers and mounds of Korean BBQ meats and had a "spicy trout" hot pot because I'd never had that (it reached the upper range of my hot tolerance) but I was delighted with my adventurous choice rather than a belly stuffing choice. CREDIT moi.

Plan for today's flight home:
Reject: All "pathetic snack food made to the specification of free airline food and then stored in hot warehouses for many months."
Accept: All "gourmet chocolate" offered by the airline. Ask for seconds.

Another plan is to log off 3FC and write my power point slides for today's presentation.


Sue (CoastalSue) - Kudos for dealing with anger, tension, and upset without using food or drink. Double kudos for doing it with equanimity rather than white knuckling it. You deserve that glorious sun.

MaryBlu - Kudos for the skipping lunch exercise, double kudos for doing it with laughter, triple kudos for doing it below 0 degrees F, LOL.

Heidi (hbuchwald) - Good to hear that Henry isn't exhibiting the previous symptoms. Kudos to you for being aware that you've taken an emotional hit and need to take care of yourself. Continuing to send best thoughts your way.

Erika (eusebius) – What a beautiful piece of wisdom from Tara Brach, "Abandon yourself to your choice," from right here in the Berkshires, no less. Kudos for persistence with your yoga and moving forward with the Beck exercises. Good luck with leaving food on your plate - despite my reported success yesterday, that's still a hurdle for me. I'm a plate cleaner - grrrrrrr.

Readers - "I can control my eating if I plan in advance what I need to do and if I practice what I need to say over and over to myself." Beck, pg 13.

__________________
XXXXXXX 7 XXXXXXX 14 XXXXXXX 21 XXXXXXX 28 XXXXXXX 35 XXXXXXX 42
Completed Beck Program-day 42. You’ve met your goal. Congratulations!

SPIRITANGEL
01-18-2008, 02:39 PM
Hi Everyone,
Beck is really working for me! I'm so excited. Yesterday I avoided a binge!!!!! I can't believe it because I am a terrible binge eater and have been that way for years. I'm now on day 6 of Beck.
I had left my joggers at the lake house and didn't have them on me last night. I was thinking it was time to use my treadmill that was collecting dust. So I did a slow walk in my work heels for 20 mins on an incline of 5. My husband was laughing at me. I was proud of my commitment.

Bill- Great news about the plane flight. I find it very hard to pass up FREE food.
Heidi- Hope you got a good nights sleep
Maryblu- Wow that is cold! You poor things up there. I hate the wind.I've been whining about the weather in Nashville being 16 tomorrow.
Sue- Thanks for asking how I am. I'm doing better then ever.A big wave to you.
Erika- I hope to get into yoga. I'm so glad you're getting results with Beck
SuchAtwin- Your post made me laugh. A free dinner he he. I have trouble eating Mexican because I get the free corn chips. I remember the 'bad seed' movie. That little girl was scary. I think you did well. At least you didn't keep eating. That's what I usually do. I think 'I've blown it, may aswell make it a party and start new tomorrow.......bring on dessert.''

A big wave to everyone!
Love SpiritAngel (SUE #2)

maryblu
01-18-2008, 06:40 PM
I've been thinking about the success stories on 3fc....all the inspirational stories. The one that moves me most, and there are several, but the one I always come back to is Robin. She did all the things that Beck outlines, without the help we have available through the BDS.

I think about how "they" always say that before an alcoholic can finally stop drinking he/she first has to hit rock bottom. I don't know if that is true or not, but in every success story I read on here, each of these women and men, said "something had to change. I knew I had to do it." One even said, "if one way hadn't worked, I would have found another, because I knew I had to succeed."

When I read Robin's story, listen to what she outlines as the joys of living life thin, it strikes me she is living the Advantage Cards everyday. She is positively over-joyed. She revels in that everyday. What Beck is arming us to do with the Advantage cards is to create that same drive, same incentives, keeping our eye on the prize. As Covey says, "begin with the end in mind." If we haven't hit rock bottom, if that snap of determination hasn't happened, we can cling to the cards, read, read, read, just do the steps, everything is there, turn-key ready for us. If we do the program, it is not possible to fail...it takes alot of effort, but we just have to do it.

I am just doing what I did the first time, just eating less. Eating exactly what I want, just less. I decided to dance with the one who brought me, and I definitely feel the fat cells shrinking. Incidious little ulgy blobs that they are. Since it did not get above 10 below today, I am thinking I might want to hang onto a few for now! :D:D brrrrrrr.

coastalsue
01-19-2008, 02:18 AM
Evening to all,

A long hectic day. I am beat. Kind Dh did make a low cal dinner. Had a great snack of prawns and low cal cocktail sauce first then a hugh salad. Followed by a small portion of basil pasta. We were nicely full, yet i craved more food-not due to hunger but an old pattern of overeating when tired. I kept thinking oh I'll have a bit of ..., no wait I am not hunger but tired. I bet I went over that idea about 20 times -never did eat, but boy it sure was a reoccurring thought.

Maryblu I think my MN Olsen grandparents would be ashamed about what a califorinian I have become-wind chill of -40, burrrrr. One of the reason I like where we live is all the green trees, lots of water (ocean not lakes tho), lots of wildlife and few people-kind of like Northern MN-but almost no time below freezing. Admire your hardiness.
I agree eating a wide selection of food but small portions is a good way, There becomes for me a natural selection to have tasty and often lower cal foods. I am picky- not wanting to waste my daily calorie allotment on oh hum foods nor too much high caloric foods at the expense of staying hungry.
Really been working a eating slowly-finish every bit a food in my mouth before adding more food. It take a long time to really chew every bit of the membrane in an orange.-still all kind of weird to me

HI sue#2-some great things to accomplish-No Binging plus treadmill work. such a "good" excuse to say don't have the my joggers and not do the work-Nice work plus feeling the gain in confidence not to binge-This non-hunger "must have something to eat" really does pass. It is kind of like a 2 year old throwing a temper tanturm, if it does not work they just stop the tantrum. Same truth for us, if we don't reward the impluse to eat (for non hunger reasons) with food, it goes away.

BillBlueEyes-You are best in keeping your food focus. I have been working on have some and then leaving alot of high caloric foods on the plate like you did with the corn muffin. I see my thin friends do that a lot. Get some treat, love it, and then walk away leaving half of it there just because they have had enough. You are becoming a true thin sir.

Heidi-glad Beck is working for you and of course good thought about Henry.

Erika-SuchATwin waving-hope things are going well in your busy lives.

BillBlueEyes
01-19-2008, 07:00 AM
Diet Coaches - Again, Thank You for your support and kind words; the trip is behind me. I aced the last three meals: breakfast buffet (again without the meats, pancakes, or pastries), incredibly good Indian buffet for lunch (only ONE plate when everyone else had seconds), airport purchased banana and sandwich for dinner. This time I easily skipped the airplane snacks because they didn't fit my plan to only accept "gourmet chocolate." CREDIT moi.

Today I try to shift my focus away from angst about eating. Begin with meeting an old friend for breakfast - a refreshing, spiritual type of discussion. Then catch up on gym and walking. Then some RL stuff.


Sue (CoastalSue) - Kudos for working through the tired evening - such clarity about what you were facing and what you were doing. And thanks for your neat ideas that became my airplane snack plan, LOL. This changing the mindset thing does seem to work.

MaryBlu - Stellar perspective there to read Robin's story as reveling in her advantages of being thin; great reinforcement of our own Advantages Response Cards. I'm going to try that. Kudos for success in serious cold weather. I have this image of you and Dr. Zhivago walking through your house looking for a bite to eat. Seems to me you've succinctly captured a plan for success with "I decided to dance with the one who brought me."

Heidi (hbuchwald) - Continued good thoughts for you, DD, and Henry.

SUE #2 (SPIRITANGEL) - Big kudos for avoiding the binge. And big kudos for your treadmill workout despite having a laughing DH instead of joggers. So, you've reached the dreaded Choose a Diet Coach day. Have you already selected a RL coach? Do you intend to ask this group to be your coach?

Readers - "When I’m tempted to eat something I shouldn’t, I need to pull out my list that contains all the reasons I want to lose weight." Beck, pg 13.
__________________
XXXXXXX 7 XXXXXXX 14 XXXXXXX 21 XXXXXXX 28 XXXXXXX 35 XXXXXXX 42
Completed Beck Program-day 42. You’ve met your goal. Congratulations!

maryblu
01-19-2008, 06:12 PM
Greetings from the frozen northlands. It was a balmy 24 below this morning; it is now a toasty 10 below for a high. It is even freezing my stupid 'puter. I just drafted a long, thoughtful, serious Beck post, and the stupid wireless kicked off and then I am not even sure where my post went, but oh, well, another time.

I just had to say hi to all, credit, all...wow, I LOVE hearing your successes; I see progress!

CoastalSue: now I *get* our connection. ..Olsen grandparents....lol....the Danish spelling......I am not a good Dane; I am a GREAT DANE!!! :D

BillBE, you are in a great spot, so to speak, to be able to let up on the "constant vigilance" and have a non-food focused day. I think I can't take my eye off the ball quite yet!

Time to stoke the furnace. :carrot::carrot:

coastalsue
01-19-2008, 09:26 PM
HI folks,

Maryblu-brrr-love your humorous description of the weather. I was born in Ely MN-boundary water plance near Canada I remember snow in June. Inspite of the spelling- my family was Norwegian -probable spelled wrong by some immigration officer in the early 1800's-but the 1st names were Anna, Carl, Ole-But the Danes are great folks!! -let stay connected.

BillBlueEyes-your day sounds like fun-Hope you and your friend have a great conversation. Your resolve with the trip is quite an achievement to be with all that free but caloric food and not indulge. -plus conferences (to me)can be rather boring, stifling, and often I get feeling of being trapped and stiff due to underexercising. So not giving into free, abundant food while being bored, caged up and watching other over eat- much much credit for the stead fastness.

I have closely following many of Beck concepts and I have taken all but 0.4 lb of the holiday wt gain. I do remain focus but this is a real "eatty" day-just want treats. I know I am not hunger and therefore not having any thing-but lusting thoughts of ice cream, ect keep coming into my head. I had a delicious and hardy lunch-I need nothing until dinner. Like Jimmy Carter I have lust in my heart, but remiaining loyal to Beck.

Day 5-
Eat slow and mindfully.

another hard to do yet useful practice. Even my Dh has learned to wait 20 minutes after food and alway finds out then that he is full. This has all help me learn that hunger rarely the reason for me to want to eat.

My portions may be small, but I am going to enjoy them by slowly eating.- let chocolate completely melt in my mouth, chew eact bit of an apple or orange before adding more fruit.

Beck mentions a possible sabatoging thought of it being unnatural-honestly I have been embrassed about how quickly I can finish a meal with company and then worry about how long to waiting when can I have seconds while they're just starting on their plate. I think my speed unnatural.

I do try drink water during to meal to slow down and will sometime put my fork down while I chew. My biggest mantra is to tell myself to have an empty mouth before adding any thing else into it. This does take focus for me-if stimulated-others eating fast, passionate conversation, exciting entertainment. I forget for some bites and in it quickly goes. I am starting to catch myself more and more. I truly believe that key to my weight loss and maintainance is small portions-I better learn to savor each bite because that is all there is baby for this meal.

Hope all is well for everyone.

sue

wendylan
01-19-2008, 09:34 PM
Hello everyone,I would like to join the group if you have room for one more.I have been reading the Beck program for awhile now and am reviewing days 23-26 focused on sabotaging thoughts and changing my thinking. This is the most difficult part for me.I am following the Weight Watchers flex plan and have just started a 8 week Weight Watchers at work program. We are in week 3,I need alot more than just the Weight Watchers meetings to lose this weight.I lost 3.4 the first week but stayed the same the second.I get so frustrated and I just want to give up,what makes it worse is my coworkers are doing better and losing faster than me.I know why this is though,I eat more than I have allotted points and I love sweets,I get very cranky when I can't have them.Some of my sabotaging thoughts are:I want to quit,This is too hard,It's not worth it,It's not fair,I can't stop myself and This sucks!!! I am working on responses to these thoughts and the workbook is helpful also.I want to join this group to be accountable.Beck really is the only way.I believe CT works and can work for me,I am a psychiatric nurse and I was looking for a plan like this.I know people can change and I see these kind of therapies help others.I especially like "do it anyway Even if I don't feel like using a diet skill,I have to do it anyway.If I do only what I feel like doing,I won't be able to lose weight and keep it off" quote from the workbook advantage cards.Also "NO CHOICE". Sometimes you just have to be strong and just say no.Well my name is Wendy,I am fast approaching 40 and have 80 pounds to lose.I am married with two boys and two mini poodles,I work as a psychiatric nurse with chronic adults.thank you wendy

maryblu
01-19-2008, 10:23 PM
Welcome, Wendy!

It sounds as if you are well on your way to sorting through the sabotaging thoughts and replacing with helpful ones. 80#s is what I lost initially (pre-Beck) and I was older than 40 at the time, so I know you can do it! I just hope I can get this da@$^%@%^ regained 14 off, because it feels like about 45!

CoastalSue...Norwegian is OK with me, too! I am 1/2 Swede, 3/8 Norwegian, and 1/8 Dane. How Minne-sodan is that?? I do speak Minne-sodan, too!

Now, for a roll-up-my-sleeves thoughtful posting on the BDS. As you all know by now, it takes me a while to ponder previous posts....and then, allofasudden, I spout forth! :-)

I have been thinking about the binging challenge identified by SPIRITANGEL. Here is what stopped me COLD, Sue#2. This was pre-Beck, but after I had my relapse and had gained wt. back, and was back so $%@^@^%@ pre-occupied with food. However you define a binge, to me it means eating when not hungry, eating way past full, and being more focused on food than anything else.

This is the hardest of the Beck strategies for me to do, but the single most effective one. It is only hard because you have to do it. You have to do day 15, you have to write down every single mouthful of food that you eat. It was impossible for me to binge when I did that faithfully. If you have to stop to write it down, stop to think about how much did I have....for me, it bought me the time to realize it was just nuts.....it wasn't any fun any more (not that it is *fun to binge)...I just find it impossible to eat beyond waaaayyy full, to eat stuff that I am not thoroughly enjoying (or even identifying, to some extent) to eat mindlessly when I am writing it down.

Beck lists a lot of reasons for monitoring and writing in the day 15 chapter, but she doesn't address this binge-stopper phenomenon much. It can't be only I who reacts this way, can it? For me, anything that buys me that moment, that pause to stop-the-madness......works.

I jumped us ahead a bit, but I really wanted to put that out there in the hope that it helps.

Stayin' warm.........NOT.:D:D

BillBlueEyes
01-20-2008, 07:13 AM
:welcome: wendylan :welcome:

And, in case you didn't received a proper one (5 years ago !!!): :wel3fc:

Welcome to the Beck Diet Solution discussion group, support group, diet coach group - certainly there's room for one more!!

You've moved pretty far along in the Beck 42 day program! Feel free to jump right in with discussion on any part, or, to get in sync with our current discussion starting from the beginning, perhaps to post a few top items on your Advantages Response Card - or all of it - to let us get to know you. We're on Program-day 5 which Sue (CoastalSue) started. She committed to start the discussion about Program-days 5 and 6, then we'll need someone to start Program-days 7 and 8 in the week after that.

__________________
XXXXXXX 7 XXXXXXX 14 XXXXXXX 21 XXXXXXX 28 XXXXXXX 35 XXXXXXX 42
Completed Beck Program-day 42. You’ve met your goal. Congratulations!

BillBlueEyes
01-20-2008, 08:05 AM
Diet Coaches - Dropped my pedometer yesterday, then stepped on it. RIP. The bummer is that I'm not that honest when estimating my own steps for the day. But, it'll only take me a couple days to get a replacement. Oh Well. Did OK at breakfast at Au Bon Pain yesterday. It's been years since I've had their croissants. I lightened up on my snacks during the day to cover all the hidden butter, LOL. Those French certainly know how to put butter in food.

I do like the Program-day 5, Eat Slowly and Mindfully, notion of savoring each bite. So much pleasure to be had from food when eating with awareness.


Sue (CoastalSue) - Congrats on your progress in losing the holidays' gains. I've caught myself shoveling in a new fork of food while still chewing the last. Working on that helps to slow me down.

MaryBlu - Good grief ! "it is now a toasty 10 below for a high." Hearty folk you Minni-sodans. I feel a tension between my focus on food which, presumably, led to my successful weight loss and maintenance, and my desire to reduce food to a smaller place in my daily existence. I want to think like a thin person, but not all the time.

Heidi (hbuchwald) - Good thoughts for you, DD, and Henry.

SUE #2 (SPIRITANGEL) - Hope your weekend is going well.

wendy (wendylan) - Congratulations for the loss in your first two weeks of WW. I know that it's frustrating when the scale doesn't show consistent losses from week to week. Oh Well. The body tends to meet it's own needs. It's great to have the affirmation from someone in the business that Cognitive Therapy (CT) works; it's new for me and I carry this Sabotaging Thought that it's just smoke and mirrors because it isn't complicated, LOL. I hear you on the Sabotaging Thought: "I can't stop myself." I like that Beck is convincing me that each time I stop I'm further developing the skill to stop, even if phrased as strengthening my resistance muscle.

Readers - "Just because I’m hungry doesn’t necessarily mean I should eat." Beck, pg 13.

__________________
XXXXXXX 7 XXXXXXX 14 XXXXXXX 21 XXXXXXX 28 XXXXXXX 35 XXXXXXX 42
Completed Beck Program-day 42. You’ve met your goal. Congratulations!

hbuchwald
01-20-2008, 11:09 AM
Hi there everyone..
Still laughing at the visual of Spiritangel in high heels on that treadmill! HA!!

I will have to find the success stories Mary-Robin sounds so inspirational. And what you say about her solidifies what we all know about BDS...it may also be an example for us that the steps we are doing don't have to feel "canned" or artificial like they do sometimes (crediting onesself, etc..). I am going to read the success stories.

Really bad news about my doggie-he took a turn and spent last night in the hospital on iv...we will visit him this morning and I have to decide if I need to euthanize. My heart is broken.

BIG sabotaging thought: "This is a very hard and emotional time...I would rather put my energy here and not worry about what I eat right now. I deserve to eat to comfort my aching heart." Response: "During emotionally difficult times, more than ever, it is important for me to take care of my body. I cannot be strong for my daughter if I dont' take good care of myself first. I have chosen to be on a plan to lose weight. My body needs to be on my plan under all circumstances."

Off to plan what I will eat today and read my ARC's. I really need strength today...I can do it though.. til tomorrow, Heidi

coastalsue
01-20-2008, 11:16 AM
Dear Heidi,

This is a heart breaking day-So sorry to hear how ill your pup now is. You. your pup and your daughter will be in my thoughts today- sending healing thoughts.

sue

maryblu
01-20-2008, 11:57 AM
Oh, Heidi,

I am so sorry about the situation. I wish I had some wisdom to share, but I don't; I can only say that I am thinking of you.

:hug: to you and your DD and to Henry.

BillBlueEyes
01-20-2008, 02:04 PM
Heidi - Ouch! Sending my best healing thoughts for all of you.

__________________
XXXXXXX 7 XXXXXXX 14 XXXXXXX 21 XXXXXXX 28 XXXXXXX 35 XXXXXXX 42
Completed Beck Program-day 42. You’ve met your goal. Congratulations!

wendylan
01-20-2008, 05:54 PM
Heidi,this is just awful news about your doggie,thay are members of our family.I hope things will work out for the best for you and your family.Stresses like this can derail a diet quickly but it sounds like you have it under control.It will not make it better to overeat and you would probably feel worse after but that is hard to see when you are going through it.I have sat many nights with a big bag of sour candy or peanutbutter cups eating them till I felt numb but this is no help.
Today I have managed to stay on program and got to the ymca to swim,36 laps=1/2 mile.I have been working on building up to that number over the last month.I take my boys with me and they swim in rec swim while I am in the lap lane.I try for 3 times a week.I went Sat and Sunday because of my weekend off.Swimming is my favorite exercise so we signed up for the indoor pool.
I was thinking about the binge topic,I do sometimes binge at night.I love to start with pizza and chicken wings and then eat candy[sweet tarts,sprees,taffy] the rest of the evening.I don't feel uncomfortable from eating that much,perhaps because it is over a period of time or my stomach is streched real big.But it is definetly a binge and I am doing it to feel emotionally better.This is something I stuggle with at times,especially when I start thinking"I deserve this,I worked all day or week I'm tired and I am not cooking!" Response I do deserve a reward but it does not have to be food,I can stop and get a movie to watch or a new book to read.I can pick up rotissiere chicken and salad or even pizza with lite cheese and vegetable toppings.I try to have things on hand so I can eat soup,salad,sanwiches and some quick things for the rest of the family.Also I binge more when I have been depriving myself,I have to leave room for small treats.
I hope everyone is having a good day,wendy

wendylan
01-20-2008, 06:04 PM
just wanted to try my tracker

SPIRITANGEL
01-20-2008, 06:55 PM
Fellow Beckers I have had a horrible eating day. I have binged and made myself very SAD!!!!!!!!:(
It was okay calorie wise yesterday but my eating was chaotic. I didn't eat proper meals, just grazed and impulsively ate. This morning I woke up and ate when I felt like it........eventually became a binge.
I have eaten many many bad foods. My calorie limit must be about 4000!

PLEASE TAKE IT FROM ME- I HAVE EATEN ICE CREAM, CHOCOLATE, DESSERTS ETC AND NONE OF THEM EVEN TASTED THAT GOOD. BEING HEALTHY AND KEEPING TO PLAN FEELS WAY BETTER!

Well I had 8 days of binge free eating and that is very good for me.
Time to get back on track and LEARN from this.
I need to eat 3 proper meals a day like a normal person and snacks when hungry. I'm going to listen to my beck audio disk now.

Hope everyone has had a nice weekend. Thinking of you all!
Wendy- Welcome aboard! Nice to have you on here.

Love Sue #2-

hbuchwald
01-21-2008, 12:33 AM
HI there everyone,
Spiritangel: try not to be too hard on yourself. It is HUGE to have not binged for eight days! Sometimes I try to remember what I was doing before any of this and need to remember that really, I am doing really well. Cut yourself some slack and hop back in the saddle (as it sounds like you already have!). I got up early this morning and made turkey meatloaf for the week-yum!

Maryblu: I have also benefitted from being diligent about writing my food down. I consider recording it online "writing it down". FOr awhile I was using the forms in the workbook to also have a visual to hang in my kitchen. It has a separate place to record "unplanned food"...that may help some people with more accountability as well???

Sue: I am the queen of shoveling food in too quickly! I have to be so mindful while eating to remember to slow down teh whole time. I am good for a few bites and then get distracted. You had mentioned the book 'Mindless Eating" and they have that "Mindless Eating Challenge" (you may have pointed that out as well) and one of the strategies it gave me was to put my fork down after every single bite and pick it up again after the food from bite 1 is down. Why is this so hard for me? Habit probably and also I am sometimes in more of a hurry than I should be in the morning. I also don't have/make much time in my life to read and I love to read while eating my cereal in the morning. I get a bit bored really only focusing on my Special K and applesauce! (You can read that last sentence in a whiney voice if you like! :) )

Doggie is here with me. He was very anxious when I was going to leave him at the animal hospital again (I visited and talked to the vet) so they called and I went back to get him. He is not doing great but I am keeping him comfy and painfree and hope that he is healing. What an emotional roller coaster.

My plan for eating worked out so well today. I didn't even have to worry about what I was going to eat, brought my lunch with me to the hospital and ate lunch in the car. Will do the same for tomorrow and also get a workout in tomorrow.

Goodnight.... til tomorrow, Heidi

eusebius
01-21-2008, 01:24 AM
Hi team,

BRRRR! It is bitterly cold here today. -14C is not too bad in itself, but the wind chill was astoundingly bad and has been for the past several days. luckily, I like to exercise inside :) No doubt MaryBlu will be laughing at my wimpiness ;) Things were indeed a lot worse when i lived further north and east (Montreal, also New Brunswick) and my in-laws in Newfoundland get this stuff well into May.

So far so good this week and hoping for a good weigh-in tomorrow morning. Thanks to all of you for your support and great ideas!

Sue - wonderful thoughts on slow mindful eating. I heartily agree with all you said! Today DH was asking me what i gained from all the crazy exercises I did this week ... skipping lunch, putting extra food on my plate, etc. and I preached a sermon on the value of mindful eating and awareness of comfortable fullness. I had to suppress a giggle as he suddenly stopped shoveling food into his mouth LOL!!!!

Congrats on your consistent weight loss and your loyalty to Beck despite cravings and food thoughts!!!!!!!

Wendy - Welcome! You are doing a terrific job with responding to sabotaging thoughts. I think you will be able to do exactly what it takes to succeed! i am almost 40 as well :) let's make this year our best ever!

Bill - Congrats on continued good eating on your trip! Sorry to hear about your pedometer. I totally hear you: "I want to think like a thin person, but not all the time." I am suspecting that once we ingrain these habits, we will not need to *think* like a thin person quite so much as *behaving* like one ... but until then, constant vigilance!!

Heidi - So sorry to hear that your puppy is not feeling well, but I'm glad he is home with you. Continued prayers for you both and virtual hugs!!! I know what you mean about eating and reading. I LOVE doing that and it's tough to stop. Even tougher for me is getting off the *#^@ computer and reading a book instead!! So I am struggling along with you.


Sue #2 - I know you will get right back on track. Good for you for thinking Beck right away, listening to the audiobook, etc. and not letting this derail you! You can do this!!

ok everyone, must get to sleep - Mondays and Tuesdays are killer busy for me this term. Thank goodness for preplanning meals and the blessing in disguise of not having a whole lot of time to sit and eat!!

cheers
Erika

BillBlueEyes
01-21-2008, 05:42 AM
Diet Coaches - Instead of going to the gym, I watched the NE Patriots win the AFC and head to the Superbowl. But I didn't consume football-watching foods. Strange that I feel less guilty because the Pats won. Did my walking; thanks to the magic of a thermal first layer, walking in frigid cold is refreshing, not bitter. [Spell checker recommends that I correct that to "superb owl," LOL.] DW and I shared the beginning of a Jane Austin movie last night; I lasted until the ladies went shopping so they'd have something to wear to a party, somewhere in the first five minutes of the film, then fell asleep. I hope they continued to talk to each other and shop successfully for the rest of the flick - I wasn't there.


Heidi (hbuchwald) - Kudos for keeping to your healthy lifestyle during emotionally stressful times. Continue to send my best healing thoughts for you, DD, and Henry.

Erika (eusebius) – Keeping my fingers crossed for your weigh in this morning. Right on: I want to act like a thin person, but think like an active person.

Sue #2 (SPIRITANGEL) - Kudos for getting right back on track and right back to listening to your Beck. And kudos for figuring out the importance of your eating to prevent a binge. Keep the faith, you're doing good stuff.

wendy (wendylan) - Great swimming there. It's such a Beck-like strategy to sign up for the rec swim for the boys so you can do your laps. Kudos to you.

Readers - "Cravings always go away, and there are things I can do to make them go away faster. I don’t have to give in to them." Beck, pg 13.

__________________
XXXXXXX 7 XXXXXXX 14 XXXXXXX 21 XXXXXXX 28 XXXXXXX 35 XXXXXXX 42
Completed Beck Program-day 42. You’ve met your goal. Congratulations!

coastalsue
01-21-2008, 08:25 PM
Hello fellow Beckers,

The plan was to post Day 6 but I am taking a vacation day from "ought to do my tasks". So tomarrow I'll get that posting done.

Yesterday we played by going to Napa Ca and visiting Copia-entire museum which focuses on wine and gourmet food. Took a cooking class and was also able to eat the result. A very pleasant meal which was paired with 3 wines-about 1 1/2 ozs in each glass. The portions were very small I was ok by DH really need more. The small but yummy portions really help me eat slowly-I better savor this as soon it will be gone. The whole thing was glamorous and (bit pompous) reality game back when we stopped at Walmart- where all the vineyards workers shopped.

Many thoughts about enjoying foods, making multi stepped gourmet meals, learning to live with small but rich portions. There are so many attitudes and emotions attached to food, and what are those so buried within me that causes overindulgence? Why are we one of the fatter countries? Why am I one of the fatter folks around? No answers but just food for thought while I learn my Beck behaviors.:D

Had a 3 lb gain in one day, I know that is water-so it will soon be gone. But cheeze body was that really necessary?!!. I know I did not eat 3x3500 cal for a 3 lb gain.

Wendylan- much good stuff by you. I love swimming-It has really helped me get fitter. I also have to work on replacements for binges-something that gives my emotions that "Now I feel Better feeling." I am kind of stiff upper lip doing this-no binging but feel "whiney" while fighting the desires. I have not found a truly mind satisfing replacement yet. Let me know your successes.

Sue#-While frustrated with yourself, glad to hear you get back to planning for the day. Over one of week of no binger-one blip and now back to the plan-Great for you. Like on working on preventing the repeat of the mistake than beating myself for the mistake. Took me a long time to learn that trick.

Heidi- I have to agree that Speical K can be a bit boring-just kidding would a few craisin for texture help? Exotic food are easier for me to remain mindful- especially my treats. It is just a habit-no deep psychological meaning like some craving- but still a darn hard habit to change.
It is clear all of us are rooting for a better Henry!
I have learned so much by the daily recording of food/ the calorie count. I have not charted the unplanned foods seperately. Like that idea of getting ideas of what/when/feelings during some unplanned eats. Much credit for your strength of remaining on your eating and exercising program!!!

Erika-Hey you hardy North Country Woman-All that weather has to add more character to you unlike the whiney Californians that complain when the temperature dips to 44 degrees. Mindless eating- my DH can do land speed records in eating a meal-and I have even beat him in the past. Now he is trying to slow down also. Sound like you are doing well on the program and doing the meal preplanning. Hope you have a great weigh-in!!!

BillBE-much credit in that you always seem to figure out a way to do some exercising. You belong to a small select group of folks who can watch football on TV with no standard all American foodball treats. :carrot: Thin folks. You are doing great.

Hey Marblu-how are you?

sue

wendylan
01-21-2008, 09:50 PM
Thank you everyone for alll the great feedback,I am having a good day today.Followed the points and walked on my treadmill 45 min.Much too cold here to go to the Y for a swim.Although I think perhaps my treadmill is going to give out.I kept inching the speed faster and it wasn't going faster.My DH looked at it and we found that when we raised the incline it would hold the speed but not at level,hard to walk on that incline.It is old.
I found it helpful to keep my advantage cards next to my bed and before I get out of bed I read them to start the day off right.I have an alarm that gradually brightens the room that I wake up to,it is great for these dark cold days and it is also effective for seasonal affective disorder.
Some of the top advantages on my cards are,relieving the pain in my ankles and feet,have more energy,look good in my bathing suit especially for the beach and water parks we love to go to,be able to wear regular size clothes,and to feel in control and at peace with my body.thanks for listening wendy

BillBlueEyes
01-22-2008, 07:09 AM
Diet Coaches - Looking for points. Here's the story. Went for a walk in the frigid temps, decided to stop at Whole Foods and take no samples of FREE food, just to make a list of what I turned down and report that to my diet coaches. Sort of like Beck's skip lunch on hunger day exercise. I was psyched about collecting my good-Becker points. Well, I skipped the ice cold apple cider right at the front door with no difficulty since I'd have to take off my gloves and I wasn't yet thawed out enough for that. Then walked the entire store - there was no FREE food. None. No cheese, no olives, no grapefruit, no special crackers, no Cape Cod potato chips, no couscous at the deli counter, no smoked salmon. Nothing. Nada. Arrrrrrrrgh :( [ Can I at least get partial credit for showing up?]

So, I bought a small jicama since I didn't even know what they looked like; had to ask. DW put thin slices on our salad for dinner. They're sweet and crisp, somewhat like apple.

Bought a new pedometer at list price at CVS so I'd have my security blanket to clip to my belt when walking. CREDIT moi.


Sue (CoastalSue) - Happy vacation day from "ought to do my tasks," LOL. Your cooking class sounds like a kick; congratulations for doing it so well. I do enjoy your "food for thought."

MaryBlu - Sending warm thoughts to thaw you out.

Heidi (hbuchwald) - Sending best thoughts for you, DD, and Henry.

wendy (wendylan) - Kudos for your treadmill workout. Your Advantages, "to feel in control and at peace with my body" resonate with me also.

Sue #2 (SPIRITANGEL) - Sending encouragement for your determination to stay on plan.

Readers - "Eating a reasonable breakfast and lunch is important so I won’t overeat at night.” Beck, pg 13.

__________________
XXXXXXX 7 XXXXXXX 14 XXXXXXX 21 XXXXXXX 28 XXXXXXX 35 XXXXXXX 42
Completed Beck Program-day 42. You’ve met your goal. Congratulations!

maryblu
01-22-2008, 10:06 PM
Well, fellow Beckies, this may be a stretch, but you know what high regard I have for the BDS. My blood must be as thick as Vaseline, 'cuz yesterday I was outside shoveling, chipping with just a quilted vest on...and gloves, of course, but no hat..and thinking it was balmy.....no wind, and 6 above Positively balmy....and yeah, my brain is frozen, and I am batty! (must be those advantage cards...thinking how many calories burned staying warm......told ya it was a stretch!)

BillBE, you get points with me, pal! Good intentions count!

Sending warm thoughts to all; I am so enjoying not feeling stuffed and feeling lighter......I feel lighter, not necessarily thinner...wierd, but I am clear that is how I feel.

coastalsue
01-22-2008, 10:37 PM
Hi folks,

had a good day again sorting and re-doing stuff around the house-got 2lbs off the the 3 gain. Big, Big credit for swimming today-1st it was raining and that always lower the poor temp ( it is outdoors) then it stopped and the wind picked up to further lower the temp of the air and water- only in the high 40's when I swam-I really moved in order to get warm and keep all parts of my body in the water at all times.
Don't know if I'll be able to post tomarrow as gone until after 10PM Going to hear The Burbeck Bros after working.

Here is Day 6. Meet with your diet coach.

why:1. Keeps you motivated. 2. Builds your confidence. 3. Helps you solve problems. 4. Keeps you Accountable. 5. Helps you take a more useful prespective.

How to find a coach
1. family or friend. 2.Form a Beck group. 3.Join an ongoing group. 4. A diet professional 5, Internet support:carrot:

What to Discuss
Changes in Weight
Successes
failures
When you are going into high-risk situations
When you have strayed from plan or a struggling with it
Struggling with doing all the daily tasks.

Well folks I feel this is the spot for me. Already tried a friend-great person but uncomfortable doing it. Some dear friends are a bit too judgmental-like "have you been bad today? Dh has patiently been thur sooo many diets plus some of struggle he has never experienced. He is supportive but mistfied by my diffculty. Nearest ongoing group is 2 1/2 hr round trip, tried to form a group-everyone flaked out.

sabatoging thoughts
I can do this alone. Reality- If I could have I would have already been thin.

Will I be critized for overeating Reality-everyone is supportive, been there and praises what you did do right and gives suggestons to help change overeating behaviors.

For me I like have the freedom of when I read and write the postings. Plus I just enjoy input from so many of us across the US and Canada. Thanks to all for being so responsive, supportive and informative-and fun to read.

sue

wendylan
01-23-2008, 12:05 AM
I would like to have the group as my coach,I do go to the ww meetings and have friends at work for superficial support but I need Beck support.I started my day with a flat tire and got to work with my packed breakfast and lunch.A coworker asked if I wanted breakfast from the cafe.I ordered dry toast and eggbeater omlet with mushrooms,peppers and onions.What I got was a large omlet stuffed with cheese and topped with cheese.What did I do? Ate the whole thing!!First mistake not eating what I had planned and packed,second mistake not taking it back or throwing it away.Thought crossed my mind from Beck,better to waste food in the garbage instead of on your body,but I didn't listen.
Day got better,ate my appropriate lunch and dinner and used my break at work to read my cards.After work found out I found my bank account was overdrawn.The kids dragged me over to the Y and I did water fitness class,I never would have gone otherwise.
Coastal Sue I don't know how you do it swimming in cold like that,that is dedication.Probably burn alot more calories.I like the 85 degree water.Do you swim laps?How many do you do?
Maryblu your description is si different from Sues,she is swimming outdoors and you are shoveling and chippig ice.That burns alot of calories also.
Billiblueyes you deserve alot of credit for walking outside in the freezing cold and for your experiment at the store even if they didn't have food out.These are the kind of tests that proves Beck works.
Spirit Angel 8 days without a binge is really great,sometimes 1 hour without a binge is tremendous.I like the list in the workbook that gives lots of activities to distract your self.
Eusebius good luck at your weigh in,how did it turn out?
hbuchwald how are things going with your doggie?
I am preparing for the weight watchers weigh in on Thursday and I am packing my breakfast and lunch for work Wed. and I am going to eat it and not be swayed.goodnight wendy

hbuchwald
01-23-2008, 01:49 AM
Hello friends,
I need to tighten the reigns... I haven't been exercising (did go rollerskating tonight but it wasn't a 'deep tissue workout' since I was skating with my daughter most of the time)... I read my arcs but too quickly lately. I have been eating within my range of calories and nutrient ranges but haven't planned what I was going to eat in two days. Sabotaging thought: I am exhausted emotionally and physically and this is lower on the priorities list than the stuff I have been doing for my 4 legged dependent to help him beat this illness. Response: I have chosen to continue the skills in Beck in order to take care of myself in the name of optimum health. It is like on the airplane, I must put the oxygen mask on myself first and then on the dependents.

I am cutting myself a small bit of slack since it is a difficult time but at the same time worry that if I get into the habit of NOT doing any portion of my plan that that will become normal life and I gain weight again. This time really does feel different but history would say that I need to worry about falling back into bad habits. What is reasonable right now?
Read ARC's (I had my card by my bed and that worked well...it isn't there now but I will move it back), eat within calorie range, exercise for 20 min. tomorrow night, record food, eat slowly and mindfully. Okay, I wasn't going to but I am going to plan what I eat for tomorrow after I am done here. I am so tired and just want to go to bed but it will just take a minute or two... I will feel great doing that.

Diet Coaches: I also tried to have a friend be my coach...too hard to get her up to speed on Beck's day by day strategies... having you all as my coaches suits me much better! I also have lots of people who provide support in other capacities but yes, it is great to have a "Beck coach". THANKS all!

Doggie report: I thought that I was going to lose him for sure this weekend (so did the vet)..bottom line, he is home now and I am giving him subcutaneous injections of fluids that is doing wonders for his energy. He isn't eating a thing so that is horrible but his liver seems to be functioning again.. a miracle! This is going to go on I am sure so I don't want to bog the list down with the doggie details...at the same time, it is what is happening in my life right now and adds another huge challenge for me to stay with the program. I am a single mom as well which I LOVE...I am just spread a little thin right now (sorry about the pun...).

About the weather-we are whining about it being cold here in WA and it was 26 degrees when I went to work this morning... my bro in MN said that it got UP to 0 degrees yesterday-wow! Shoveling snow in frigid weather is a GREAT workout!

Goodnight coaches-you are the best!

BillBlueEyes
01-23-2008, 07:30 AM
Diet Coaches - At a neat lecture last night, I passed on a table of home baked snacks, except for one bite from DW's pumpkin spice cake. CREDIT moi. It's getting easier, but I still had thoughts about the food running through my head before I arrived, even though I had rushed away from the dinner table to get there. Looking forward to the day that my brain entertains something besides food. Lunch packed for work was wonderful: N.O. style red beans over brown rice and curried okra. I had cooked a big pot of both on Monday just for packed lunches. CREDIT moi. It does seem to be the case that healthy eating requires some preparation.


Sue (CoastalSue) - Big kudos for swimming in the chilly weather. And congrats for nibbling away another 2 pounds. Do you have some thoughts about guidelines for being online diet coaches? Have you ever read any suggestions from Beck? Just thinking here that we all could benefit from coming up with some ideas. Perhaps it starts with attentive listening and feedback. Includes suggestions on how the Beck strategies might be used. But I get unclear, for example, about how far to chase after people who aren't posting. If I was a RL diet coach, I'd call; that might be just what they needed to get back into making contact, and even if it weren't, it would be a private call. Here on 3FC, I don't choose to post their names because it's public even though I wish to send them the warm gentle reminder that I'm thinking about them. What do you think?

MaryBlu - What an image - MaryBlu chipping ice without a hat in 6 degree F cold. LOL, does the blu in your name refers to the skin while outside during MN winter?

Heidi (hbuchwald) - Super kudos for keeping your priorities straight under duress. What a great way to say it, "I must put the oxygen mask on myself first and then on the dependents." Healthy eating and exercise will contribute to your mental health to help you handle your major stress load. I wish you well on making choices to stay on your plans while making some concession to your current time bind. Continued good thoughts your way for you, DD, and Henry. I hope the uncertainty about puppy is not taking a toll on DD.

wendy (wendylan) - OK, I accept my role as being one of your online diet coaches and I ask you to be one of mine. Kudos for your clarity in seeing your actions on the breakfast. For me it's just amazing how easily I can be distracted from my plan and head down an old path with no major benefits except being familiar. And more kudos for the water fitness class; most of us mere mortals are quite happy with 85 degree water.

Readers - "If I don’t follow a nutritious diet, I’m more likely to cheat." Beck, pg 13.

__________________
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Completed Beck Program-day 42. You’ve met your goal. Congratulations!

hbuchwald
01-24-2008, 12:32 AM
Hi there coaches,
I ate 5 cookies today! One was a big peanut butter one (my favorite kind...) that a student gave me since it was his birthday treat. Why couldn't he bring those icky storebought cupcakes that most kids bring that I say a nice thanks and then quietly put into the garbage without a second thought afterschool? You can see how it is my student's fault right? hahahaa. Then, because I am a teacher and attended the skate party, the PTA prez gave me 4 homemade choc chip cookies. I was alone with them in my classroom and was this close to giving them to the four kids in my room who stayed afterschool for tutoring. But no.... I ate them all. That was it and it is over and I went right back on my eating plan, recorded the cookies and feel better telling you all about it. Heidi vs cookies round 1 goes to cookies... :( The peanut butter one was so worth it and I savored every single bite of it. The others were not as good as I thought that they would be (didnt' stop me from eating them though)... they tasted so heavy and sugary. That used to be a plus in a food for me!

The advantage on my cards that is really speaking to me lately is: "I want my actions to be in line with my vision of my ideal self." I love that one and that is the one that pops up during the day in my mind.

Hard to think about any guidelines that would fit for everyone's needs. Do others have ideas about any? I feel like I get what I need in a coach from you all. What would you want from the group if you were on hiatus from posting?

Off to do my little workout before hitting the hay.

Have a wonderful Thursday everyone, Heidi

hbuchwald
01-24-2008, 12:36 AM
Hey! I just noticed that I have "junior member" by my name... I don't think that was there before. Did I earn a promotion in the group? Hahahaa.. seriously, is there some system that measures how many posts you have made to the group? Sue and Mary have "senior member" and Bill has no label at all... is that because you are in maintenance Bill? Just curiuos.

Goodnight, Heidi

BillBlueEyes
01-24-2008, 06:27 AM
Diet Coaches - Or 337 shopping day till Christmas, if you'd rather, LOL. Yesterday was warm enough for a walk at lunch even without wearing a thermal first layer. I walk past two small stores that display whole fish on ice in the front window. Whole fish always look fresh and healthy to me like they just arrived from the fisherman's boat. A goal for today is to collect tax info from my dentist's office and from my pharmacy; only 80 angsting days till April 15th for those who file US tax returns. Oh Well.


Heidi (hbuchwald) - BIG BIG Kudos for cutting yourself some slack for the cookies and getting right back on track. That is Beck through and through. Glad that the peanut butter cookie was worth the detour.

If I "were on hiatus from posting" I'd want to feel that I could just post without having to explain my hiatus - just welcomed as me here now. That's the feeling I'd like to send out to anyone who hasn't posted in a while and might find reentry difficult. So perhaps we can recognize that as a guideline:You don't have to explain a hiatus; just post starting with today.

I don't know the rules for automatically generated labels under our names. I do know that you can go to your profile and change it to anything you want, as I obviously did. I had wondered at what age I'd get labeled "senior member", LOL, but I looked at the profile of one "senior member" and they were in their twenties. Maybe a passing monitor will enlighten us.


Readers – “I have to make time for dieting and exercise.” Beck, pg 13.


__________________
XXXXXXX 7 XXXXXXX 14 XXXXXXX 21 XXXXXXX 28 XXXXXXX 35 XXXXXXX 42
Completed Beck Program-day 42. You’ve met your goal. Congratulations!

coastalsue
01-24-2008, 05:09 PM
Hello everyone,

missed posting but had an excellent full day. I have started a tutoring group at our local library-as a retired teacher really wanted to do that-We are large but lightly populated county in Calif and the funding for school is poor-that is true for Calif in general. Plus then got to hear the Brubeck Bros play increditable jazz-such professional skills and creativity.

surprise, suprise even lost 2 more lbs so now I am now 314 so soon I get to move my tricker-I am so yoyo I tend to wait until the loss stays off for 3-4 days. I am very eager to get under 300's. My goal for this year is to get under 250.

Heidi-cookies and the end of a teaching day. I was so suprised how tired I was even after the tutoring session. I remember utter exhaustion some days after school. Almost to tired to walk to the car- and still needing more planning for the next day to be done. Your response after eating the cookies was soo commemendable!! acknowledge, record, forgive, and get back on the food plan. I have these occasional wierd moments which I am kind of like outside looking at myself eating food which I really don't like that much just because it is there and -this is usually when alone and when it is in front of my nose. For me being tired or really angry are the two biggest factors in such moments. Got any ideas about what you were feeling? I also was wondering you were a "junior". It is a mystery. Your advantage card is beautiful written- to have actions in line with my vision of my ideal self. A concept which can apply to our food, conversations, attitudes and actions. Very thought provoking. Thanks for sharing.


BillBlueEyes-Have really pondered you questions for guidelines about our roles of being diet coaches here. We are more like a self help group without professional experience and as such each poster and/or reader may be a different place in these changes to permantely accomplish weight loss. Each of us has our timing about coping with the stumbling blocks to making changes. For me the first step was full acknowledge to myself I needed to change- then to succesfullly work on the Beck steps requires that I need to do acknowledgment and self analysis when not able to complete them. Some time I am up to it and sometimes I am not. But I do know that more I put into the postings, the more I get out of it. The hugh wonderful constant has been how positive all responses have been and the sharing of ideas and solutions.
Your daily postings have been a increditable help to me-I read them even when I was not following my food plan but felt a connection and pull to return to the Beck program just reading them- Plus your work has kept this forum alive-hugh hugh credit to you !!
About contacting others and encouraging them-I think it is a fine idea if that is something you like to do. Every posting I have read from you has been positive and unjudgemental-you contact will be likewise-how they respond is based up their needs of the time. Your continual postings and work at keeping this forum current and easy to locate also help everyone to join in when ready. Plus you keeps us going on for those who(me) don't have clue to start a new thread at the end of the month.

Wendy-what a day to start with a flat tire-then inspite of your best intentions, cook changed your order. And you still swam and followed your plan for the rest of day. Plus you focus was to solve the unexpected eating than letting them sabatoge you. That is a big one for me not to "blow" the whole day. Much credit!! Our pool runs in the low 80-I would like 85 for my joints but it is never that warm- more like 81-83 degrees. Today I was in the water for an hours-back to old time before Christmas. Felt Great. One of my best antidepressants. Hope all is well .

To everyone, YOU all are great and so much fun to read the posting-kind like the OA slogan at the end of meeting-keep coming back and posting it works!

sue

maryblu
01-24-2008, 08:39 PM
I think we have pretty much all agreed, a good Beck coach is hard to find, and we have discussed the reasons that is so.

We also know that if Beck says to do it, we shortchange ourselves if we don't. I think we have agreed the BDS works; we have seen success here in a variety of ways; and I think most of us have found the coaching and accountability we need here. Credit, all!

Credit, all and thanks, all..and I second CoastalSue's sentiments of thanks to BillBE for his steadfast work. I appreciate every single one of BillBE's posts; they are always so thoughtful and I have come to appreciate that consistent voice and daily post. It is no small feat, and we appreciate it. I also appreciate the way CoastalSue can say what I am thinking/ feeling so much better than I can say it myself. That is way cool.

I must admit, I have come to look for posts from all; that is not to pressure anyone, but I appreciate the wisdom of our collective voices.

Heidi, credit you..."I want my actions to be in line with my vision of my ideal self." What a great, well-thought out advantage.

I am wondering about BillBE's musings about will we ever be able to let down our guard with food issues? From what I have been reading on Maintainers, it is beginning to look like perhaps not. It fascinates me how many of them talk about doing things that Beck is teaching us. They aren't Beckies, but they came to that wisdom somehow......Now, tell me Beck doesn't make sense! We are learning what they had to the hard way!

I can live with always having to "watch what I eat" so to speak, but I wish I could get over the preoccupation with food (described so well by BillBE and CoastalSue)..it is just so stupid! What a waste of time to keep thinking about the muffins at the meeting.......well, some of my meetings ARE pretty boring.....bad example...lol.....to be looking at everyone's plates at the restaurant as the waiter brings them by....sic. *sigh

eusebius
01-24-2008, 11:56 PM
Hi all - it's been an exhausting week AND I just lost my previously planned post.

In short:
I lost 2# this week!! woohoo! thanks for all your help & support!
I am so tired that I feel vulnerable to cravings; however I know that this would lead to a terrible downward spiral in physical and mental health and the momentary pleasure is NOT worth it! Beck works!!
Sue - WTG on 2lbs gone and thanks for your great thoughts on days 5 and 6!
Bill - thanks for your compassionate thoughts about hiatus, much appreciated.
maryblu - credit you for recognizing the value of this group as coach(es). i am starting to think that the food obsession is, for us, what pema chodron calls "shenpa" - an urge that is "both the itch and the scratch". It can, in fact, become our teacher ... when we recognize it, credit us for seeing it for what it is and for resisting it and flexing our resistance muscles!!
here's an article about it:
http://store.soundstrue.com/article-w886d.html
I think i really need to listen to her entire audiobook on the subject ... once i've finished beck and "the mindful way through depression" ... one thing at a time!!
have a great night all,
erika

BillBlueEyes
01-25-2008, 06:51 AM
Diet Coaches - I did it!! I did it!! I repeated my trip to Whole Foods to exercise my resistance muscle when faced with FREE food. They delivered a nice spread of seven different succulent offerings; I resisted. CREDIT moi. With immediate benefit: as I continued my planned one hour brisk walk, I felt a tad tired and thought about taking the short cut home. No way, anybody who can resist Whole Foods FREE food can finish a planned walk, so I did. CREDIT moi. I do love this stuff when it's working.

Sue (CoastalSue) - Congrats on 2 more lbs. I'm cheering for your breakthrough to under the 300's. Thank you for your kind words and for your insights on hiatus, coaching, and staying on plan. This mutual listening, giving feedback, and sharing of idea about Beck strategies could be called co-coaching, similar to co-counseling in Harvey Jackins' Re-evaluation Counseling. Gotta go read up on that for ideas for us here. Methinks that Beck's book is much more centered around having a professional coach rather than a peer coach. We might have to contribute to expanding her book a bit; there are FAR more overweight people than there are CBT therapists.

MaryBlu - Thanks for the kind words, and thanks for so eloquently expressing why I also like CostalSue's musings - she so succinctly states what I'm thinking. Erika's insight that our food fixation is our shenpa might help me get out from under feeling embarrassed and annoyed so I can accept it and then work on it. You soooooo capture food obsession with "looking at everyone's plates at the restaurant as the waiter brings them by," LOL.

Heidi (hbuchwald) - Gotta join the chorus here and acknowledge how much I admire the Advantage, ""I want my actions to be in line with my vision of my ideal self." Really nice.

Erika (eusebius) – Congrats on the 2#'s and kudos for the demo of working Beck strategies even when exhausted. And thanks for the thoughtful post about Pema Chodron. That shenpa idea is really powerful. LOL at busy, busy Erika adding books to her reading stack. Perhaps the 12 step guys could modify their slogan to One book at a time. (Thought of you yesterday when I say a picture of the Kripalu Center in the Berkshires covered in peaceful snow.)

Readers - "I have to prepare in advance for sabotaging thinking.” Beck, pg 13.

__________________
XXXXXXX 7 XXXXXXX 14 XXXXXXX 21 XXXXXXX 28 XXXXXXX 35 XXXXXXX 42
Completed Beck Program-day 42. You’ve met your goal. Congratulations!

wendylan
01-25-2008, 01:25 PM
Hello everyone,I am just checking in,I had my weigh in on Thur. at the WW meeting and lost 1.2 pounds. Total of 5 for me but others in the class have lost 10 or more in the 3 weeks.Have to say I was a little disappointed after all the extra exercise and work I put in,but I am a bit hormonal and I have a big retaining problem from salt.I don't eat alot of salt but I love Franks Red Hot pepper sauce and put it on alot of things.I noticed too that trying to reduce fat and calories leaves food tasting bland and I use more things with salt in,I don't add salt.Especially soups lowfat frozen meals and 94% fat free popcorn.Anyway I wrote some advantage cards for weigh in from the book:
1 Use the number on the scale as a guide to decide whether you should keep doing what you are doing or make changes.
2 Celebrate every1/2 pound loss,expect no more than 1/2-2 pounds a week.
3 At worst gaining weight means I might have made mistakes that I can correct during the coming week.
4 All dieters have weeks where the weight stays the same or increases slightly.
So I am just continuing on.Had a very good lunch at home today. A weight watchers pita split in half with tomato sauce onions,fresh jalapenos,garlic,crushed red pepper and 1/4 cup lowfat mozzarella to top and baked in the oven.Also a Jonny Gold apple which was very crisp and 10 oz.I find I shop more and I try to treat myself with healthy foods I especially like,fresh fruit,baby greens salads,good strawberries ect...Also bought skinny cow chocolate peanutbutter icecream sandwiches,3ww points.Have to hide these from the kids,I bought them some regular ones.
Everyone seems so good at posting just the right thing for everyone,please bear with me as I am just learning.I have two questions. How often shall we check in? How do I update my ticker without making a new one?

BillBlueEyes Congratulations on your trip to Whole Foods,you did a great job.Also you followed through with completing a step in the book.It is easy to read through some of the steps and just think"I don't really need to try that"and just skip a step or exercise.You are following through and you are at goal.

CoastalSue Great Job 2 more pounds and you have set a reasonable goal for the year.I also like the fredom or reading and posting any time.The swimming is such a great exercise and very soothing and stress relieving,it must be wonderful living by the shore.I lived in Florida 4 years when my husband was in school and we were constantly in water at the beach or pool.We live in PA after moving back so the kids can be near the extended family,I miss the weather and beaches every day.

Eusebius Wonderful to be down 2 pounds this week! Good insight into the connection between feeling tired and being vulnerable to cravings.Sometimes I turn off all the lights downstairs and get in bed real early just to avoid the unplanned eating.Once downstairs is closed thats it,no food.

Maryblu I also believe Beck works and is the answer to my weight problems.Preoccupation with food is difficult and you are definitely not alone. You are doing a great job.I have been thinking to myself that I want some sweet/sour candy.I have also been thinking a few pieces is not what I want,I want to lay on the couch and eat candy all evening to soothe my stress.I have on one of my advantage cards from the book."As you follow your diet plan and tolerate craving after craving,you will find the cravings definitely diminish and you won't have to battle every time you see your favorite foods."This is what we are working for[I wish for this some day]

hbuchwald You are doing a great job with all the stress you are under and you are still fitting in your meal planning and exercise!You are not giving up and you will suceed.

I was also wondering what step everyone is currently on?Do you try for one a day,one for a few days?I am still stuck on the sabatoging thoughts and have been reading these over for about a week now.I do see on here that we go over one step a week and we are on the find a coach now. have a great day wendy

CherryAutumn
01-25-2008, 01:29 PM
Hi everyone,
I have read almost all of your previous posts and have found much encouragement from them. I have ordered the Beck Diet Solution book in the mail but still have not recieved it. I struggle with depression and emotional eating and so i have found it very hard to lose weight. In fact due to negative thinking i have been gaining fairly rapidly.

BillBlueEyes
01-25-2008, 07:24 PM
:welcome: CherryAutumn :welcome:

And, in case you never got your proper one of these: :wel3fc:

Welcome to the Beck Diet Solution Discussion Group, Support Group, Diet Coach Group.

Feel free to jump right in. We've started reading the book from the beginning and are now up to Program-day 6. Since we only do about two Program-days per week, you'll catch up in no time.


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Completed Beck Program-day 42. You’ve met your goal. Congratulations!

maryblu
01-25-2008, 10:24 PM
Yay, Yay!!

Welcome Cherry Autumn, and

Great job, Wendylan!! You are getting it fast and doing the steps.

I think you will see we are very loosely organized. There is no reading assignment or set plan to stay on track day by day. Life happens. We have volunteers to lead discussions in sequence, but we don't do a step a day.....we had originally said two days per week, but I don't think it matters......we all work it as we can, and get support and give it when we can.

I tend to post about the tool/day/step I find most helpful for the moment. BillBE took us through the whole plan initially, but now we are just here to be coaches, remind/ encourage/share wisdom. Would you all agree?

BillBE, I was really surprised by your comment "Methinks that Beck's book is much more centered around having a professional coach rather than a peer coach." I had never thought of it that way; I am such a loyal follower...just do it......it's a good thing she never says do something illegal!

I just think a real and effective coach is hard to find. Even my attempt to organize a study group failed...a person has to be at the right stage and ready, and just 'cuz I say it works, that doesn't mean any of my friends are ready. The good news is we are all ready and committed here.

For those of you feeling my pain in the frozen northland, we are above zero for a minor reprieve, but back into below zero highs for the day next week. *sigh......and we are all still being cheerful, saying we can tell the days are getting longer....we aren't hardy, we are stoopid, stoopid, stoopid! :-)

coastalsue
01-26-2008, 01:36 AM
Hello Everyone,

Welcome to CherryAutumn hope you find the support you need here. THis is a good group.-both very thoughtful and supportive. Even some of concepts for dealing with depression are similiar to Beck's idea- This use of the mind to change behaviors. Maryblu is right in that this group is not very structured, but everyone goes through the book and write about their difficulties and success and we'll chime in our thoughts.
Erika-love the article which you included in your posting-some great ideas by Pema-the use of poisons which we think can sooth us. Hurray that you are down 2 lbs!!!!.
Maryblu- the food preoccupation-It think is is Heidi who wrote about about if we control something or if it control us. I guess by giving food such "magical power-cure unhappy emotions, fatigue,and boredum plus provide happiness," then when it does not work we just eat more versus learn that food has no magical powers other than to remove hunger and give our bodies fuel.- While I always have to alert around food, I have found some days I am more relaxed living with my food plan, but other days are really tough. I know some ex-smokers want a cig all the time inspite of quiting years ago. When trying to meditate some people call the difficulty in keep a calm mind as the mind being like a monkey-monkey mind -thought and ideas hopping everwhere. It is embarassing to hear a friend's sad troubles and be thinking about the cookies behind her. Oh well that is just our crazy monkey mind.

BillBlueEyes-great actions today at Whole Foods.-you did it!!plus continued walking inspite of being tired. Feel that success you have earned -every once of credit. You continously meet the challenges you set for yourself WOW. Great determination.
I think that Beck actually overestimate the skills and confortablilty of people to be a diet coach. My husband loves wood working, I love my husband but I can only listen and understand a limited amount of his detailed steps to finish a project. I feel that about the diet coach who is a friend -how many times can I go on about my food problems which they don't share or really see as a problem-Here in this forum we share the passion about the complexity to loosing and keeping weight off. We can go on and on about it and folks listen and understand.

Wendy-So glad you lost and could work throught the disappointment about not losing more.I am a slow loser also( of course I am in my 60's and Everything is done slower now) But still I have made some great health gains-lower blood sugars and blood pressure. Alot of good is happening even if the scales move slowly. Thanks for posting the advantage cards-all good reminders when we want more weight off quicker. Just today I though that I had only lost about 45lb last year-if only i had lost more.....not eat.. then realize once I was close to 400 lb and will soon be under 300. 299 sounds so much better than 400-heck I am a winner even tho a slow loser.
I like those skinny cow ice creams also-we dont have the peanut butter ones up here. I also love the ocean what a magnificente sight!! Our coast is very dramatic and rugged. At times it kind of reminds of the shore of Lake Superior
without the snow(Oh Maryblu in the 0 temps)
best wishes to all
the winds and rains have arrive with some minor flooding of roadway. Our Kids were to come up, but not going to risk it. NOt the storm of couple of weeks ago but power may go.
sue

hbuchwald
01-26-2008, 02:06 AM
Hello there friends/coaches,
I ate unplanned food tonight at Chuck E Cheese-yuck! I ate pizza and a piece of storebought cake that always LOOKS good but never is worth it when I eat it. Oh well...water for me tonight. I realy feel sick. I am trying to remember that I used to eat that kind of stuff ALL the time. That my whole diet was unplanned. Seems like a lifetime ago. I am in a minor panic though since I am so scared of losing control. How timely of Sue to bring up the "power of food"...it is so silly for me to think that because I ate too much tonight that my whole plan is DONE. I really don't like how I feel right now physically and am trying to let this be a lesson for me to learn from. What else can a person do?

Bill-I love the guideline of not having to explain a hiatus and that a person can start wherever they are in the program. Big kudos to you for doing your Whole Foods Challenge! And to keep on walking when a shortcut was calling your name... impressive!

I will do something with Day 7 and 8 within the next few days for us. I am hoping that can get my head back into this fully and hopefully pull my weight (pardon the pun) around here!

Sue: I really hope that the weather doesn't get too crazy down there and that your power STAYS ON! We are supposed to get some snow up here in WA state this weekend. I will believe it when I see it. We are whining since it is in the upper 20's in the mornings...I would never survive in Minn.!

Off to bed for me. Doggie looks better everyday and brings us so much joy... what a sweetie he is!

Bringing my cookbooks to bed to find a few recipes to make this weekend to feed off of during the week. And of course Beck so I can ponder deep thoughts about Day 7!

You all are really the best...yes, Beck should read these threads and see another way that diet coaching can look.

Heidi

BillBlueEyes
01-26-2008, 07:29 AM
Diet Coaches – I plan to drink more water today, since I regularly drink much less than is generally recommended around here because of the extra trips to the john. I admire all of you who regularly report drinking 8 glasses a day, always wondering how you manage the constant pee breaks. Had some pomegranate arils with my Clementine for evening snack yesterday. When savoring the sweet, juicy, joy of Clementine or pomegranate I find it hard to remember that eating is about satisfying hunger. I accept it to be positive to delight in food when eating on plan.

Thanks to Sue (CoastalSue) for starting off the discussions on Program-days 5 and 6, and to Heidi (hbuchwald) for volunteering to start off Program-days 7 and 8.

Sue (CoastalSue) – Thanks for the analogy to your DH's woodworking details. I can't imagine telling my DW the angst of my Cuban Missile Crisis Cookie. She'd think I was crazy, LOL. I do like your story of listening to a friend while thinking of the cookies behind her. Monkey mind to say the least. I cringe at the thought that a mind reading device would ever be invented - ouch.

MaryBlu – Sending my warmest best wishes to the frozen northland. LOL, you make it so inappropriate to complain that our highs don’t break freezing when your highs don’t break zero. "… we are just here to be coaches, remind/ encourage/share wisdom. Would you all agree?" That sums it up for me.

Heidi (hbuchwald) - LOL at the memory that being a parent brings one to eat at the likes of Yuck E Cheese. I do want to send the gentle reminder that getting back on plan after a minor diversion of a slice of pizza and cake can include some light eating, but it's best to avoid skipping dinner and only drinking water. I'm pretty sure you're on top of that idea, just want to make sure that any readers don't get misled to the notion of deprivation - since deprivation is an invitation to big-time falling off plan. I'm also just delighted by the image of you curled up in your warm bed reading a good cook book.

Glad to hear the Henry continues to bounce about. Continuing to send my best healing thoughts for the three of you.


Erika (eusebius) – DW also liked the article on shenpa. She's a Pema Chodron fan and already has a couple of her books.

wendy (wendylan) – Congrats on the 5# loss; that’s right on track for three weeks. I know it’s difficult not to compare yourself against everyone else, but comparing is a Sabotaging Thought that can distract from working our own path. Can you make yourself a response something like this Helpful Response: my body, my path.

Your pita pizza sounds yummy. You're really into some healthy foods there. Even with healthy foods, it’s really smart to avoid bland – or any food that you don’t like. Long term success is most likely when healthy eating is about making smart choices, not about deprivation. There are a bunch of really flavorful seasonings that don’t contain salt; Mrs. Dash is one of the easiest to find (some 4 or 5 different combinations). There are others. Also, the free catalog from Penzeys.com is full of ideas for use of seasonings.

"How often shall we check in?" When starting out, daily is really great because that helps to stay on track and to avoid the Sabotaging Thought to just drop out. It’s worth making a commitment to yourself to post daily, or at least every other day because then you can pull out your Just DO it card and either make a status post or, at least, a Just waving post. If you find yourself in a hiatus of multiple days remember that we don’t require an explanation – just pop back in with today’s status.

"How do I update my ticker without making a new one?" Can one of the ticker updating people help here?


CherryAutumn – Kudos for recognizing emotional eating; boy, that’s a great first step. The Beck Diet Solution is really on to strategies for addressing depression, emotional eating, and negative thinking. Start slowly, work diligently. You’re at the right place here.

Readers – “I need to sit down and eat slowly and notice every bite – every time I eat.” Beck, pg 13.

__________________
XXXXXXX 7 XXXXXXX 14 XXXXXXX 21 XXXXXXX 28 XXXXXXX 35 XXXXXXX 42
Completed Beck Program-day 42. You’ve met your goal. Congratulations!

CatR
01-26-2008, 03:41 PM
I am happy to find this group. I got The Beck Diet Solution from the library last Fall and read it. It all made sense, but I figured I could get by without doing the exercises. I did OK with my diet for a few days, but then had a bout of emotional eating. Between emotional eating and the holidays, I am now 4 pounds heavier.

I am 62 and have been struggling with weight--up, down, up, down--all of my life. I am usually on a "diet", but can't manage food outside the context of a "diet". When I get upset and binge, I don't give any thought at all to what I am doing at the time. It is just automatic.

Well, I am fed up with this misery and just ordered the book. I will follow the posts until I can participate more fully.:)

coastalsue
01-26-2008, 06:44 PM
Hi guys,

Just finished reading an article called Change the Way You Think About Food in Feb 08 EatingWell mag. This article describes how the different parts of the brain react to foods, the way we can get "addicted" or get a sense of reward with eating inappropriate amounts of foods. For me science so help removes negative attitudes about my eating-all that moralizing or really the demoralizing state I can get into when eating unhealthly. The solutions for changing all this brain pattern-yup Behavioral Cognitve therapy. We are so on the right track-All the suggestions for changes were things we are all doing when following Beck's book.

CatR- Welcome. The book has a nice pace for getting started-there is two weeks just to get prepared to go on a food plan-join us and give your self time to make the adjustments.

BillBlueEyes- You always make me ponder and I love it. I think to throughly enjoy food for it's inherent qualities is excellent.-flavors. textures, pairing with other flavors. Then it is like watching a beautiful sunset-one of life's treat. But when I make the food a "solution" for other of life's problem then I have give it too much power. P.S. I am going on a blood orange jag as a treat-yummy. tis the critus season. I find it harder to drink all the water when it winter-just drink more when it is summer and warmer-So I have water containers in a couple of places. I admire how you can set a challenge for yourself and so consistantly meet it. I have a real sense of fear of failure that I can not be perfect. There is almost a tension build up so that I am screw up that I just blow it (just hurry and eat something unplanned) to get the tension over with. Thinking about your skill in meeting your challenges. Much credit. Anyway thinking of ways of dealing with my odd tension pattern about fearing I will fail at being "perfect" in highly challenging food situations-parties, friends.

lights are flicking so have posted quickly in case of lack of power.

sue

coastalsue
01-26-2008, 07:20 PM
Hi again

Power stayed on -but has been off at least 2 times for about 4 hrs today-others are still without power.

Heidi thanks for doing the next couple of sections of the book-Best wishes for a ever healthier Harry. Oh that darn Yuck E Cheese-So popular if one is under 10 yrs. Were you tired on Friday after teaching all week? You have done so well, forgive, figure out how not repeat it and go on. That is a powerful response. The quicker you return to the plan the quicker you can unlearn the mystical allure of tastless but high carb foods. I am still working on that myself. Learned the concept of giving up power from you.-so thank you for that idea.
-Sometimes after eating too many but non nutrious cals during the day I focus on lowfat high protein stuff. a protein shake, defrosted cook shrimp for dinner.

big wave to everyone-hope all is going well.

sue again

wendylan
01-26-2008, 08:24 PM
I am just checking in,I work this weekend so I am busy with that.I have stayed within my points,swam Fri eve and today I am taking a break to get some ironing done.This book helps so much,I have never stayed on program and track for so many days in a row and without feeling deprived.Also 2 months ago I can remember so many days after work just picking up pizza,chickenwings,hoagies or whatever just to get through dinner and then laying on the couch exhausted.Now I am getting more done and at the pool about 4-5 times a week.Where did all that energy come from?Welcome cherry autumn and cat! This message board is great and really gives that extra push to continue on and to see others are struggling just like me AND SUCCEEDING!I am using both the book and the workbook. have a good evening

hbuchwald
01-27-2008, 02:02 AM
Hi friends,
Thanks Sue and Bill for the encouragement and perspective. Yes, I was tired on Friday! I am back on track now... feeling good and now have a house full of healthy groceries and plans to make a few things for the week. Credit moi!

Bill-those clemantimes sound so good. Yes, it is so good to enjoy food! I think that my body is actually getting used to having so much hydration..I don't pee as often as I did when I first upped my water intake. I still do take more trips than before but just try not to be irritated by it. It could be a drag to have to go all the time but the benifits outweigh...

Welcome CatR! I have gone up and down a few times as well. The skills/strategies presented in this book are helpful in so many areas of life. Checking in with this group is so great too. This is a good bunch of peeps!

Sue: the article is so validating.. I have never read that mag-will look for it next time I am at the store. I relate to the perfection thing too. I was thinking about that after my post about the pizza/cake episode and Bill's comments put it in perspective. It was one of those times and I can move on and eat lighter the next day and make any other accomodations.... it is not so black and white like my mind likes to assume sometimes. I really don't need perfection..just "good enough"..good enough to take care of myself and live in this world that has some yummy food in it (or crappy yet oddly desireable food)...

My big dog is lying right here next to me. He is more himself all the time-a miracle!!! I am giving him fluids subcutaneously and giving him lots of meds.... it is so worth it to see him comfortable and back into his routine of life (mostly). I feel my blood pressure drop even thinking about his sweet nature. Pets are so wonderful!

Til tomorrow my friends, Heidi

BillBlueEyes
01-27-2008, 05:57 AM
:welcome: CatR :welcome:

Welcome to the Beck Diet Solution Discussion Group, Support Group, Diet Coach Group.

And, in case you never got your proper one of these, :wel3fc:

What's the story behind your 3FC moniker, CatR?

Great idea to jump in while waiting for your own copy to arrive. LOL, I ordered a copy from Amazon, then decided I couldn't wait so got one from the library until mine came.


__________________
XXXXXXX 7 XXXXXXX 14 XXXXXXX 21 XXXXXXX 28 XXXXXXX 35 XXXXXXX 42
Completed Beck Program-day 42. You’ve met your goal. Congratulations!

BillBlueEyes
01-27-2008, 07:59 AM
Diet Coaches - I did it. Drank all that d*mn water; worked my pedometer making trips to the loo. Wasn't as bad as I had expected, maybe I can try to increase my water a bit anyway. My thing yesterday was to make a big pot of dal from two pounds of dry lentils. Remember, I'm not a cook, so I kinda got caught by surprise how much 2#'s of lentils expands. Had to move some from our largest pot into a second pot. But, it came out really good and I have enough for a potluck today, my lunches next week, and a batch frozen for lunches for a future week. AND, DW and I had them for dinner last night.

I did get a good lesson on Beck's Common Thinking Errors:Thinking Mistake #9: Exaggerated Thinking
You make a situation seem greater or worse than it really is.So, I started out with 10 cups of water - WAY more than enough. Then had to add 2 cups. Then another cup. Then 2 more cups. At 15 cups of water had to offload into a second pot. The Sorcerer's Apprentice kept getting louder and louder; my heart was beating. I pictured a kitchen engulfed in boiling lentils. Needless to say, the lentils drank their fill and stopped swelling without magical intervention. I assume you experienced cooks wouldn't have been on the verge of calling 911. Oh Well.


Sue (CoastalSue) - Thanks for the pointer to the Feb 08 Eating Well magazine. I'll check that out. Appreciate your thoughts that "to throughly enjoy food for it's inherent qualities is excellent." I lost my focus there for a moment and wondered if I was headed off path by reveling in good food. Now, however, you have me drooling at your blood orange jag. Enjoy.

MaryBlu - Was thinking of sending Saint Bernards with casks of brandy your way, but the SPCA might frown on sending them into below zero degrees Fahrenheit - too cold for good dogs, LOL.

Heidi (hbuchwald) - Yeah for back on track and a house full of healthy groceries. I know that I feel more on track when my fridge is bursting with fresh veggies. Cheers for Henry; continued best thoughts.

wendy (wendylan) - Amazing energy there, "... at the pool about 4-5 times a week." What a gift to mind and body both.

CatR - You make such a good point with, "but I figured I could get by without doing the exercises." I find that I'm easily seduced into the comfort of self help stuff by reading alone, without ever getting the benefit. It's been very important to me to actually do the Beck exercises. The hunger day exercise, for example, just blew my mind to find out that I had such a strong aversion to hunger when, in reality, it only lasted about half an hour and only reached about level 2 on my discomfort scale. Who would have known?

Readers – “I now know … If I eat something I shouldn’t, it’s just a mistake. It doesn’t mean I’m hopeless or bad. I don’t have to make it a bigger mistake by continuing to eat whatever I want for the rest of the day.” Beck, pg 13.

__________________
XXXXXXX 7 XXXXXXX 14 XXXXXXX 21 XXXXXXX 28 XXXXXXX 35 XXXXXXX 42
Completed Beck Program-day 42. You’ve met your goal. Congratulations!

maryblu
01-27-2008, 11:24 AM
More Beckies! Yay. Welcome, CatR

Kind regards to all.

BillBE, thanks for feeling my (weather) pain, but it is postively Spring-like today. 10 above already! More light, some bird sounds, and I haven't had to spend any money on snow-plowing this entire month. Life is good. Just heard nasty news about more big weather in CA. I am not sure how anyone can deny that the weather is becoming more extreme.....*sigh

There has been discussion of the Beck exercise to skip a meal and analyze the hunger feeling. I have found that since that one simple exercise, I am now much more comfortable being hungry. There are times I break down and have to have something, but I went to bed hungry (about a 2, not bad) last night and just didn't feel compelled to eat at all......granted I ran the risk of not sleeping, but that wasn't a problem.

I remember Bob Greene on Oprah one time coaching a woman with her last 10#s to lose, and he said, in order to do that, you are going to have to accept that feeling of hunger, embrace it, because that is the only time you are burning into fat reserves in your body. Keep in mind, he was speaking about the last 10#s...but I do believe that is true for me at this point.

Looking forward to your posts and Beck Wisdom

BillBE, so not into the Stoopid Bowl...now Super Tuesday, there is a countdown going on in my house...DS in keeping better track than I am!

coastalsue
01-27-2008, 06:31 PM
hello all,

One of perks of no TV is so little hype enters our lives-kind nice but some would find it dull.

Short posting as the power has gone off 4X during the last 2 days. We hope to go to movies if it stays on. If not- a good read by portable lights.

The last couple of days have been calm (inspite of weather)-It is then so easy for me to do all the Beck concepts-plus losing some more weight. The EatingWell article talks about the role of stress in overeating and how some form the pattern to eat inorder to cope with stress. Has the same ideas as Beck to how re-program in other responses to cope with stress. My goal is to post the next time I expect a get into a social eating marrathon-especially with old drinking buddies and have you all help me form a game plan to be stay on my food plan. I need a Beck Brain Change here-a major new groove. This is my last major problem to consistantly lose weight. Over the holiday I gained and lost over 14 lbs. It wasn't a straight 14 lbs but yoyoing the same range over and over agiain. I am ready to lose 14lb and actually be 14 lighter not at the same place.

I have done alot to tolerate being hunger and not eating- But here is my hardest time being hunger-going to bed hungry. Like you posted MaryBlu- The hunger makes me rather alert and really have a hard time to fall asleep. Hear every noise, feel every little pain, every lump in the bedding. Does this happen to others? What to you do? Nighttime was often the time of my binge eating so it feel so good to stopped eating then-I rather not eat anything at that time and these over alert times happen about 8 times a month. Is this just an Oh Well moment?

BillBlueEyes-loved the image of the every expanding pots of cooking peas. If you get your hands on article in EatingWell-they have an spread on foods and recipes from India.

Heidi-Great posting about getting prospective on returning to a food plan-instead of numbing over and maintaining mindless eating. This need of perfection has made me very self critical which has very unnecessarily hampered my enjoyment of life. Plus fueled depression. Studying Buddhism and learning the inherent good in humans helped me learn how my judgements and prespectives are just my making-not a concrete reality. In other words on calming that monkey mind which thinks so highly of its own misconceptions and focus on quiet mind. Go Pup-getting better! Pets exchange love with us which is so uncomplicated-I do feel so good just petting our cat (Lula) and watching her enjoyment of being petted.

Wendy-How great to get yourself to pool with such dedication this week. Wonderful to read your sense of success!! Your have done the work and you have earned alot of credit!!!!

A HI to everyone
sue

hbuchwald
01-27-2008, 07:36 PM
"Out of sight, out of mind". Beck says to put all trigger foods behind closed cupboards or in the car or not around at all and just buy in single servings to avoid major tempation.

I am all about putting healthy foods that I am excited about readily available for myself and my daughter. Most of the time I am fine with a few sweet things in the house but when I am in the mood, I may overindulge. I mentioned before that my childhood was in a home with NO sweets or anything "unhealthy". This is a great idea in theory so that the kids won't eat bad food. BUT it was so forbidden that we would eat the granulated sugar out of the sugar bowl when my parents weren't there. I am attempting to have my own food plan which entails living in the world with real food and real temptations, etc... AND model for my daughter "normal eating". HA! With balance in mind, we have a "little something" each night. It could be a piece of candy or a skinny cow ice cream sandwich, or something. For the most part, this works for my eating plan but my daughter still knows that there are limits on the items on the top of the food pyramid and they are "highly desired". That is a whole separate conversation for people without kids at home but something that is on my mind. I don't want food to be forbidden yet I want to feed her healthy stuff.

The other part of keeping the environment free of trigger foods includes communicating with people at work about not putting treats out in plain view. Beck refers to the sabotaging thoughts regarding not inconveniencing others, that people will ask about the eating plan, etc.. What do people think about that? I don't think that it is reasonable for me, one person among about 100 people on a school staff, to ask everyone to change what has been standard operating procedure about this. I am a big girl (pardon the pun) and choose not to look at that table in the staff lounge when I walk by. I also have lots of other routes to take to get to the office or my box or whatever. I do eat my lunch in there but haven't succombed to the treats in there. Sometimes it is a potluck and there is food EVERYWHERE too. Maybe I am indulging a sabotaging thought but it really isn't all about me at work. Beck says to counter that thought with "who is really that inconvenienced anyway? We deserve to stand up for ourselves, etc..".

A strategy that Beck brings up is, when faced with something unplanned and tempting, to take a single serving of it, wrap it up and put it on the plan for the next day. I am thinking about my "cake episode" from Friday and that could have worked for the cake. I was in sort of a frenzy though after the pizza. That is where "catching the thought behind the behavior" is difficult for me. Always good to slow down and wait even 5 minutes before indulging, drink some water, etc.. I could see wrapping it up and it looking really nasty later on when I have my wits about me and throwing it out! I must remember this strategy!

"Once I make changes at home and at work to remove whatever temptations I can, dieting will be easier." p. 95 Beck

She does also say that getting all that tempting stuff out is most important in the beginning of weight loss and then it may be easier to keep some things around and not be tempted.

Now I am in the mood to clean out my fridge. I am making split pea soup, chicken alphabet soup and we will have a whole wheat bobali pizza tonight with turkey ham and mozzerella ... yum! I am not a gourmet cook but am dabbling a lot lately with some simple cooking and am very excited about it. I have the book that Jessica Seinfeld wrote, "Deceptively Delicious"... the chicken abc soup recipe is from that and it has cauliflower and sweet potato puree in it. That is the deception but my daughter knows it is going in.. then she can say that she likes cauliflower and sweet potatoes (if she likes the soup...). :)

Have a great rest of the weekend everyone! Heidi

eusebius
01-27-2008, 11:33 PM
Hi everyone, I had an interesting weekend. My DH wanted to get an important research task done, or mostly done, so DD and I cleared out of the house and went to stay with my parents for the weekend. So ... no food planning for me. I was a bit stressed out and went off plan Friday night, but i had enough flex points to cover it and also stayed within my points allowance all weekend. We shall see how the weigh in goes in the morning. Between Beck and yoga ... and mindfulness techniques ... I do believe some of this non-distorted thinking (and dropping below thinking!) is working for me.

Just a couple of personals:
Sue - I hope very much that we can help coach you through stress eating. Re being hungry at night: You seem to be a very aware and mindful person. Can you be with the hunger sensations and observe them at bedtime? Is it truly hunger or is it stress? Could it be that your balance of protein/carbs/fats is off? Just some possible questions ...

Heidi - Excellent, excellent post on Day 7. Do you think the "Deceptively Delicious" book might be WW friendly? It sure sounds great for feeding my somewhat picky DD ... though she is better than some. Thank you for your insights on all this!!

Bill and MaryBlu - My continued gratitude for your wisdom and support!

Welcome to CatR and other newbies! Looking forward to hearing more from you!

Have a great night all,
Erika

BillBlueEyes
01-28-2008, 06:04 AM
Diet Coaches - Made it through three potluck buffets yesterday - a convergence of infrequent events that landed on the same day. Stayed on plan including a planned slice of mincemeat pie that I knew DW was baking for the dinner, primarily to get rid of the jar of mincemeat before it expired. Besides my dal (which, to my delight, was all gobbled when other food was passed over) I brought some baked pita chips that I really wanted to try. Potlucks work for me to get a single portion, or even just a taste, of something that would be a calorie burden if I brought a whole container home.

Re: Day 7 - Arrange your Environment. Have made good progress on the food cleanup. The fridge is clear of junk and full of fruits and veggies. The freezer does contain DW's single serving dark chocolate that I don't see and don't go after. At work I've stocked some emergency foil tuna and crackers that can serve as lunch if I don't bring one. The nuts in the pantry haven't been trigger foods for the several years of my journey, so they've stayed - I bake them in my granola and eat six (count them 6) when I have anything else for breakfast. But I'm ready to let them go if I find myself going back to the old habit of eating them by the handful. Sigh ... many of the pounds that I had to lose came from cashews and almonds.


Sue (CoastalSue) - No TV !!! How do you keep track of the awful weather they're having in California, LOL. hummmmm... evenings, stress, and hunger. Do you have a planned snack after dinner? (It works for me to have a planned fruit snack about 8pm; I look forward to the sweet taste and it prevents hunger until I go to bed.) Do you do your meditation in the evening (or some other calming exercise)? I have, on occasion when the stress was really high, just gone to bed. That works for me because I'm a morning person and I'm not stressed in the morning.

MaryBlu - Kudos for going to bed hungry. Don't know that I've ever done that. I didn't lose my last pounds by being hungry. I lost them VERY slowly - so slowly in fact that I was surprised as each came off because I assumed that I was plateaued.

Heidi (hbuchwald) - What a neat idea to use the Deceptively Delicious concepts to get healthy foods past your DD's taste bud barriers so that she thinks herself as LIKING the veggies, not just getting them into her stomach for her health. Your break room sound like a challenge. Beck makes good points about inconveniencing others, but changing the break room environment for 100 people will take time. Have you considered bringing in some raw veggies? Perhaps you could begin to identify a like minded group of people who kept one end of the traditional food table supplied with healthy nibbles. You've got a challenge there.

Erika (eusebius) – Kudos for your rapid recover Friday night. LOL at the thought of refugees caused by a research project.

Readers - "I now know … I have to put my needs first sometimes." Beck, pg 13.

__________________
XXXXXXX 7 XXXXXXX 14 XXXXXXX 21 XXXXXXX 28 XXXXXXX 35 XXXXXXX 42
Completed Beck Program-day 42. You’ve met your goal. Congratulations!

CherryAutumn
01-28-2008, 10:48 AM
Still don't have my Beck book and hoping it will come in today. I am so anxious to get it cause i really need the boost to get started. I am struggling with my depression and that is a bad thing when you are an EMOTIONAL EATER. I think i read that there is some pages in the book for emotional eating? I definately think many of my problems with dieting stem from behavioral problems and negative thinking. Do you think that Beck can help me? Love reading everyone elses posts but sometimes i tend to lurk more than post but i am here.

CatR
01-28-2008, 02:05 PM
Thank you everyone for the welcome.

BillBlueEyes: My moniker is a take on my name. I usually just lurk on forums, but 3FC is the first one where I have started actively posting. It would probably be better if I had one that was less personal.

I can relate to what you said about self-help books. I feel so happy when reading them because now I have found the "answer" and everything will be different from now on because what is being said makes so much sense. I want it to be easy, but changing long-ingrained thought patterns is work.

Sue: I like your phrase "social eating marathon" when you get together with a group of your friends. Those type of occasions can easily undo a week or two of hard work. I am looking forward to hearing how others manage social situations like that.

CherryAutumn: I am an emotional eater too. It is a very common maladaptive response to stress. The Beck Solution will be a big help if we do the work. I got a copy from the library last Fall and didn't do the exercises, so I ended up with the same thought patterns and 4 more pounds four months later. I have since lost 3 of those pounds, but this is no way to live.

I also have a copy in the mail and am going to make some changes with the support of this group. We can do this!:)

wendylan
01-28-2008, 04:59 PM
I see we are working on step#7 Organize Your Enviroment.I have been working on this today.Shopper at 4 different stores stocking up on good foods to last the next two weeks.I got tomato basil chicken breasts{precooked and just pop them in the microwave},baby green bags of salads,1% milk,weight watcher breads,1 point tortillas,light icecream,juicy apples,fresh lemons and light mozzarella sticks just to name a few items.When dieting it is important to get items you really enjoy.I am very happy with my purchases but the rest of the family will not be very interested.I buy for them snacks they like and I don't care for such as chips,doritos and nutterbutter cookies.I am more likely to binge on sweet and sour candies or taffy.Didn't buy any of those.Also I know if I did buy a bag of these candies I would not be happy with just a few.
At work since we have a group of weight watchers we asked the others to stop bringing donuts,muffins ect.. to our nurses station.It is working with only occasional trials,one day a girl brought in donuts and another nurse took them and hid them in the closet from us.Makes it easier when you are not alone and others know a bit about what you are trying to accomplish.We also have some food police that watch what we are eating and keep us honest.It is so much easier for me to just pack my breakfast and lunch the night before and eat what I bring.Then make dinner at home and a snack before bed.
I am a little worried about eating out though.I have not eaten out in 3 weeks and I turned down going for Mexican food with coworkers because I was afraid I would get extra calories with hidden fats.Especially since my episode with the cafe at work stuffing my healthy omlet with cheese.
Another thing probably harder than going out to eat is getting together with family for a meal.My mother is a wonderful cook and makes the best desserts.In our family food is love!!!!!!!!!!We are all getting together on Wed. for a turkey dinner at my mothers house.It will be just like thanksgiving with all the desserts and everyone will be having at least 2 plates and desserts.I am working in the day Wed. and will not be able to come home and prepare a healthy dish to bring.
BiiiBlue Eyes-You give me inspiration,if you can get through 3 potluck buffets in the same day maybe there is hope for Wed night.I am going to try to follow your lead,plan ahead what I will have and schedule one dessert.How long have you been at this Beck thing?I appreciated the "My body My path" and have added it to my cards.
CatR- You are so right about Beck working "if we do the work".It is not easy and takes time and alot of thought and preparation.
Cherry Autumn-I am an emotional eater also and Beck is right on target.I am still reviewing steps23-27 that are exactly about changing the negative thinking.Last night I reviewed 23-Countering the unfairness syndrome-such as "its not fair I have to struggle with food when eveyone else is eating cake"-respone being-Everyone has things in their life that are unfair,this eating thing is mine.I will not give up,I would be treating myself unfairly if I don,t take this chance to improve my health.Sometimes if I stop and just think "What am I thinking right now" when faced with temptation I suprise myself with the answer not being about food at all.This takes time and peseverence.
eusebius-Great job staying on program for the weekend,I do the flex plan also.It is a great accomplishment to stay within points on the weekend.I tend to plan my meals exactly on work days and on my days off I don't plan everything and this works out.Although sometimes I feel a little guilty for not planning those days[like Beck says] but it works for me.

hbuchwald-Thanks for all the great information on our step.You gave me another good idea for my Wed. dinner,I can always wrap a dessert to take home,I don't have to think it is the last supper and gobble everything up that night.
CoastalSue-I can understand about going to bed hungry,I do not sleep well and wake up more.I have a snack built into my food plan before I go to bed,100-150 calories especially if I was swimming that day.Great job losing the 14 pounds you had gained,you didn't just give up like alot of others would.
Maryblu-Great job completing the work for this step,I found this to be a harder one I would have rather skipped.
"I didn't feel compelled at all" to eat WOW!! That is a great feeling, to be at peace with yourself.Something we are striving for.
Thank you everyone for all the great feedback and support.Today is my day off,I shopped and dinner is rotissere chicken[no skin],salad,italian bread with lie butter and probably1/2 cup lite icecream with fresh strawberries after swimming.I am setting a goal this week to get to Y 4 times and to not overeat Wed. dinner. thanks wendy

CherryAutumn
01-28-2008, 05:11 PM
Yay! My book finally came in the mail.:carrot: I can't wait to get started.:broc: LOL Sorry i just love the dancing Vegetables. I will try to post a little more once i get started

CatR
01-28-2008, 05:47 PM
WendyLan: Eating out is a minefield. Some of the major chains now post nutritional information on their web sites. A lot of the lunch offerings pack 1000-2000 calories and can be ridiculously high in fat. I eat out with a friend occasionally and try to steer us to places where I know there are one or two offerings that fit with my eating plan. When we try new places, I make the best choice I can and take half home for the next day's lunch. I have 2 snacks a day and can usually forgo one to try to compensate for whatever excess I may have had. But I still usually feel that I "have been off my diet" for the day.

It is very hard just to say "no thank you" to family and friends when they have worked hard to prepare a rich dish. Usually I give in, eat too much, and then spend a few days getting back on track because "I've blown it anyway and another day or two won't matter".

I googled "food pushers" since this is a big issue with me. A Washington Post article came up at the top of the search results with some suggestions. I can't post a link yet, but it would be worth checking out.

hbuchwald
01-29-2008, 12:39 AM
Hi there friends,
We have snow up here in WA state! It isn’t much but we treat it like an emergency..we just aren’t as prepared as people are in MN and other places that get it all the time. We are supposed to get more tonight with a possibility of no school tomorrow (I teach and look forward to a sleep in day as much as the kids periodically!).

I am really having a hard time making myself exercise. I am trying to figure out the sabotaging thoughts behind it… mostly I just feel tired I think and use that as an excuse. I have MORE energy to do all that I need to do when I move my body. I will put my pedometer on tomorrow and see if I can get more steps in….

Erika: So glad to hear that you think that Beck is helping (along with yoga and being mindful while eating). About the cookbook being WW friendly… I guess it depends… the nutrient info is not on the recipes but you could keep track of the ingredients if you wanted to use the recipes. We had the soup tonight for dinner and it was SO good! I love soup in the winter time and this one is a winner. We added chopped up celery and carrots-other than that, the veggies were from the puree and you seriously could not even tell that they were there. WW friendly-not by itself but if you factor in feeding kiddos healthy stuff, it may be worth the extra time/effort it takes to record the ingredients.

Bill: THREE potluck buffets? Credit to you!! Great idea to bring healthy stuff to the potlucks at my work. I am so into cooking lately that maybe I would bring something even more complicated than chopped veggies. I am sure that some others would appreciate some healthier options at these things.

Cherry Autumn: Yes, Beck concepts can help with emotional eating. I am glad that the book came! I love how each day’s worth of reading is really doable for even really busy people. A lot of helpful stuff packed into a few pages per day. NICE!

CatR: Welcome to the group! Yes, this stuff is a lot of work but really worth it!

Wendylan: You loaded up the yummy and healthy food-great work! What a challenge to go to your family dinner knowing what tempting fare there will be. So good to have a plan ahead of time. You can even plan your breakfast and lunch to be on the lighter side that day and drink lots of water throughout the feast. I took a “mindless eating challenge” –got the info from CoastalSue and one of the strategies that it mentioned was setting my fork down between every single bite. That is REALLY hard to do. But, if you know that the dinner will have such a high focus on food, maybe that would help you slow down and not get lost in the eating part? So impressive that you are getting all that exercise in too!

Til tomorrow, Heidi

coastalsue
01-29-2008, 04:20 AM
HI to all,

Heidi, enjoyed your posting on day 7. I started doing Beck with no trigger foods in the house, after 5-6 months later I could re-introduce again and remain OK. You sound very aware of modeling for your daughter. We do learn so many food attitude when young and you learned living with extreme rules for children does not work. I hope a compromise could be worked out for the staff room-I bet many folks would like less temptations in the room. There are studies about office candy dishes and people eat a lot more if it in a clear easy to reach container and less if in opaque one. Could the treat be at least stored in a container-keep the cookies box closed versus put them on a plate? Check with some other folks and I bet many would like less food out in the open. Then you may feel more comfortable if other supported your request in the staff room. Or continue on as you have been of using these as OH Well situations and being able to see and ignore the "goodies" which is tough but very commendable.
I think wanting to eat more healthy actually forces one to become good cook. Only cooking it at home can reduce the fat, salt and sugar and increase the veggies. Then one start getting used to taste of fresher foods. P. S. may you get a nice sleepy snow day- Does any other exercising sound more fun? A new tape? one your daugher may even dance to? Other time is is just do it? I love to swim but really helps to have a buddy to push me at times.

BillBlueeyes-3 potlucks and you stayed on the plan. You really aced the day. again much credit.

Wendy-You are working so many points in the program. Getting food for the family and for yourself. The challenges are many and you are meeting them. Glad co-workers are helping you.-hope the food police don't get too judgemental. I dislike it when my friend asks if I have been bad. Heck i am not perfect nor bad- I just am blessed with many "learning" how to do better situations. Dinner at Mom sounds like a hugh feast. Plan, Plan-what are your favorites?-what portions size can you have? enjoy each bite of that portion. no seconds, but take stuff home for a meal the following day. We will be rooting for you on Wed night. Good Luck

CherryAutmn-Good to hear the book has arrived. I have gained so much weight due to being an emotional eater. I use Beck as a very pratical way to go step by step to change my behaviors. I also throw in some self help books about overeating, meditation and such. I have stopped with the diet books as they so often promise the moon and give me such strict rules that I eventually give up. I preplan, record and count cals -for awhile I tried to eat "perfectly"-absolutely no process food with sugar, white flour, butter but would feel too restricted at times-now I am doing fine including some small treats made of such things. The chapters of dealing with cravings and how to reward yourself are good-this stuff helps fights the response to soothe with food. Also a big help for me was the hunger exercise-hunger really does pass without eating. Do post about how things are going for you.

CatR- enjoyed your suggestions-alway thought places were so cal loaded in their dishes. a 2000 cal lunch-wow. I think I am finally tired of that behavior of if I blow it for a meal then go for a couple mindless days. I was doing that during this 6 months of studying Beck. Now having gained and lost the same 4 lb over 3 times during the past holidays has finally taught me to stop with the one blowout and get right back on plan.

Erika-Hope weight in went well. It took planning to remain within the flex points. Thanks for your suggestions and question regarding my nighttime hunger alert moments-I think I fight the aggitation verus looking at it and releasing it. Sometimes it feel emotional and other times it feel like it is an internal driven physical thing.

I had an annoying but nothing seriously wrong day. I give my self credit-late afternoon I really wanted a drink of wine or eat some thing caloric-I sputtered to Dh but consummed nothing but ice water. Then in the middle of a chore I felt the entire mood lift away. imagine I felt better without any food/alcohol-plus I was hunger and tired. Think I am making some changes inspite of 60+yrs of stess response eating. I stayed on the plan.
good wishes to all
sue

BillBlueEyes
01-29-2008, 06:20 AM
Diet Coaches - Tried an experiment yesterday. Although I already had roasted brussel sprouts (leftovers) for lunch with my lentils yesterday, when I warmed them in the microwave I included one Florette of raw broccoli. It came out cooked!!! (Duh) Although obvious, I now have another source of veggies for lunch, especially nice since this is the peak season for good broccoli.

And an unexpected opportunity to say NO CHOICE: after a whole day of good planned meals without having to make buffet-like choices, and no offered or encountered off-plan foods, ending with a Minneola Orange for evening snack (first ever for me), a ghost from yesterday unexpectedly appears. DW offers me half a slice of mincemeat pie that followed her home from yesterday's potluck. "No thanks" says I, - piece of cake, didn't even work at it. Thinking about that this morning, I feel that that's a sign of something working. Yeah Beck.


Sue (CoastalSue) - Kudos for moving through a terrific opportunity to use food for emotional support. Nice work.

MaryBlu - OK, I acknowledge the countdown to Super Tuesday. Is it being hyped? Well, today's news contains the pairings of who shook who's hand at the State of the Union, and who looked on. Junior High School memories came crashing down on me, LOL.

Heidi (hbuchwald) - Keeping my fingers crossed for your snow day. Don't have a wise thought on keeping to the exercise since I have that problem also. I am rather hard on myself for my excuses, even when legit, but that doesn't seem to help. Remains a place for me to work. Continued good thoughts for Henry.

Erika (eusebius) – Waving to the displaced person, LOL.

wendy (wendylan) - Your shopping reads like a checklist for wholesome eating; I'd feel right at home eating from your fridge. "How long have you been at this Beck thing?" I've been working Beck for about five months. (Sue (CoastalSue) and MaryBlu were part of the original Beck thread stating five months before that, when the book was first published.) Good luck with your family dinner. That's a bunch of challenges, but each challenge has a Beck strategy that you can use. Sounds smart that you're carefully planning your responses. That seems to me to be the biggest Beck strategy of them all: if I plan a response, it's pretty easy. Good luck - I too will be sending supportive thoughts on Wednesday night.

CherryAutumn - Yeah for the arrival of Beck's book. "Do you think that Beck can help me?" Yes, I think it can. You've got the enthusiasm and know from reading here that the Beck program works when one actually DOES the exercises. I'm betting that you'll find what you need with it.

CatR - Neat insight: "changing long-ingrained thought patterns is work." I always thought that the work of losing weight was about suffering while feeling hungry. Now I believe that the hard work is about changing long-ingrained thought patterns. It's work alright, just different than I had expected.

Readers - "I now know … It’s OK to say no to people who offer me food." Beck, pg 13.

__________________
XXXXXXX 7 XXXXXXX 14 XXXXXXX 21 XXXXXXX 28 XXXXXXX 35 XXXXXXX 42
Completed Beck Program-day 42. You’ve met your goal. Congratulations!

coastalsue
01-29-2008, 09:43 PM
Hello everyone,

Well it is Burrr here. Was going to swim but since it was in the low 30's with a slushy rain just could not get in that outdoor pool for an hr swim. An uneventful day, but I did stay on the Beck program. Thus it was a good day.

BillBlueeyes-glad all the diligence paid off in mindless non-eating. You have worked hard and have earned all your successes. Some days are so much easier for me and am counting on more ease with foods with time. PS I loved oven baked Brussles Spouts. We do lot of oven baked root veggies also-those small dices piece can almost taste like raisin in salad. How sweet veggies become with there is less sugar in my diet.

Hope all is well with the all of the fellow Beckers-

Sue

CatR
01-29-2008, 10:08 PM
I realized today that some stomach sensations that I have associated with hunger are probably due to air. I checked it out online and it is possible that I swallow air because I eat too fast. So I will work on eating slowly and mindfully.

I will have my first food challenge in the morning if I can get to a wood carving meeting (it is snowing). The host's wife makes really good cookies. I am not going to have any coffee because there is nothing better than cookies with coffee. I am going to take a thermos of a herbal tea that is really heavy in cinnamon because it is satisfying like having a dessert and I wouldn't like it with cookies.

I have done OK with my eating plan and exercise since starting with 3FC last and have lost 1 1/2 pounds so far. I just have to remember that everything I eat matters.

eusebius
01-29-2008, 11:45 PM
Hello all!
Another 2# gone this week! Thank you all for your support and insights!!
Heidi= did you get your snow day? Re exercise - how did it go with the pedometer? Walking can't be beat IMO ... I have been known to run but it makes me ravenously hungry. I think this time I'll wait until I'm at or close to goal to start again ...

Sue - Great job avoiding the caloric food and wine. You're inspiring!

Bill - LOL, "piece of cake" - or no piece of pie - great job either way! Beck has infiltrated your bloodstream!

A great big Hi to MaryBlu, wendylan, CatR, CherryAutumn and all I've missed. Looking forward to a great day tomorrow -
Erika

maryblu
01-30-2008, 12:42 AM
Yanno what is so great about us?

I had a totally self-indulgent, eat- what- I -want- because -I -want- it -day(fell short of binging by my definition, far short of that, but still, plenty too much food) and you all did great! You had lots of wisdom and learning to share, and it is so cool to see it working for all of us.

BillBE...you set a high bar...no pressure there, lol

I am not going to list my indulgences, but I can say I just felt like it..no real rationale, just wanted to .........life is hard when it is this @%^@^%%@ cold. I was out tonight at a night class 35 miles away..with other hardy, foolish folk.......a balmy -45 with the wind chill. It will be -24 tomorrow actual. CoastalSue...BURR??? BURR?? Excuse me? 30 degrees ABOVE! We'd be out naked, taking a warm shower!;);)

DS, the poor college student is having car trouble with his 96 Buick all 270,000 miles of it. How many dog years is that? How do we expect anything to run in this? I did have the pleasure of saying to him, "In my day, there was no such thing as wind chill. We just saw 30 below, and thought it was 30 below!"

BillBE, thanks for taking the bait on SuperTues. The observation about Jr. High is right on in mho. I have long said we choose a President as if we are voting for Homecoming King.

Well, thanks for feeling my pain. Back on track tomorrow.

hbuchwald
01-30-2008, 01:25 AM
HI there friends,
No snow day for me today... oh well! It was a fine day despite students' and some staff members' expectations not being met... that is the trouble..it was "expected". :)

So..the pedometer was on this morning and I bent down to pick something up off the floor and it fell off.. it wouldn't stay on the waistband of my skirt. I am ready to go to it on the treadmill after this post though. I am responding to my sabotaging thoughts... "my body feels so much better when it has moved". "I deserve to take the time to take care of myself". "This is what I have chosen to do for myself". And lastly, "I want to get stronger, not weaker (physically too... )".

I cannot imagine anything below zero weather on any kind of regular basis Mary-I was saying "brr" while reading Sue's bit about the outdoor pool today. I love swimming and go to family swims with dd periodically. She is a good enough swimmer now that she could bring a friend to open swim and I could swim laps-nice to have that option! I have never been a lap swimmer but got some goggles a few months ago and that makes all the difference to me as far as swimming for any length of time... I like just playing around and treading water, etc... but want to try the lapswim thing. Yes, sometimes we do dance around and she even likes to exercise with me. I feel like I am in a better frame of mind right now... Yes, those Beck strategies really do show up at the darndest times. Love the "piece of cake/no piece of pie" situation! You are so inspriational Bill!

Maryblu: you had one of those days but you still sound like you are "on your plan".... sometimes I feel like I am "falling off the wagon" when I do that but it doesn't have to be that way..Life goes on. Do you feel like you are back on the horse? Yeah, nice that some members of the group are feeling stronger when any of the others of us are having weak moments or hard times or whatever...that is support!

I will write up a little something about Day 8 tomorrow night. That is the beginning of Week 2-Get Ready for Dieting.

Til tomorrow, Heidi

BillBlueEyes
01-30-2008, 06:21 AM
Diet Coaches - Arrrrrrrrrgh: I now know ... that Tom Brady was wearing a pin-striped blazer, blue v-necked sweater, and open collar white shirt. Sports writers have always described what women wore, but I've always said it'd be a cold day in **** before they wrote what a man was wearing. Now I've seen it. (Perhaps Maryblu would tell us that the cold day in **** has arrived also, LOL.)

With perhaps a touch of hubris, I shopped at Whole Foods expecting to repeat my triumphant turning down of FREE food, proudly carrying my Beck Response Card: NO CHOICE, UNLESS I REALLY WANT IT. Gotta rethink that card. First thing offered was swordfish grilled in herbs - clearly fit my exception due to unusual offering; gobbled it. Next was a series of three aged balsamic vinegars, culminating in one aged 12 years in 4 different types of wood barrels ($37.99 for 250 ml). I've been dying to taste real balsamic vinegars. Gobbled those. Then a taste of fat free soft cheese, Fromage Blanc, blended with frozen berries eaten like ice cream. Never heard of that before. Gobbled it. (I did turn down some cheddar.) My only problem is that I don't have a real problem with my choices, except that I went in with this image of demonstrating one principal, but demonstrated another: that I've given myself permission to sample rare or expensive items if I acknowledge them and account for the calories. So, combo of Oh, Well and CREDIT moi. Maybe CoastalSue can tell me why I feel conflicted, but not bad.


Sue (CoastalSue) - Kudos for another day on plan. I too have experienced that, as I decrease my sugar, the sweet taste of other foods becomes evident. I send you my condolences for your loss of swimming due to cold weather, since clearly you aren't going to get any sympathy from MaryBlu.

MaryBlu - Kudos for taking a bad day in stride and getting back on track. Sending warm hugs your way; your cold spell continues to boggle my mind.

Heidi (hbuchwald) - Thanks for the demo of using Response Cards to ward off Sabotaging Thoughts. When I'm debating doing exercises, I forget about my Response Cards - gotta remember those. Continued good thoughts for Henry et. al.

Erika (eusebius) – Congrats on the 2#'s - nice ratcheting down.

CatR - Congrats on the 1 1/2 pound loss. Wonderful demo of Beck style strategy of bringing hot cinnamon'd tea to help avoid cookies at your wood working class. I really like that one. Kudos, Kudos.

Readers - "I now know … I have to watch out for fooling myself. Every single time I put food in my mouth, it matters." Beck, pg 13.

__________________
XXXXXXX 7 XXXXXXX 14 XXXXXXX 21 XXXXXXX 28 XXXXXXX 35 XXXXXXX 42
Completed Beck Program-day 42. You’ve met your goal. Congratulations!

CatR
01-30-2008, 08:10 PM
I passed over the cookies at the woodcarving meeting with a little help from my herbal tea.:carrot:

I usually eat a snack at 10, so took my food and ate that. Nobody noticed. So much for my concern about appearing different.

I like the rare and expensive sample option. That eliminates a lot of the samples that stores offer. Whole Foods just took over Wild Oats here and will be moving to a larger store. Hopefully rare and expensive samples will be offered there. This is probably an option for maintainers.

I finally came up with an item to put at the top of my Advantage Card: Get in shape for a great backpacking trip we are planning for the end of August. I will be 63 and it is getting harder! Losing another 12 pounds should be a great help.

coastalsue
01-30-2008, 10:44 PM
Evening everyone,

CatR your planning for the woodcravers meeting was so successful-much credit. Planning to hike the Sierras in August?

BillBlueEyes-Hey, who is Tom Brady any way? Maybe the card should read NO Choice with a 2-3 monthly passes for when at Whole Foods and the samples very unique, expensive, never tasted, free and to be eaten mindfully and calories/amounted recorded for the day and deducted from snacks. Heck you are working at becoming a gourmet cook and this stuff is your materials for new dishes-this is a learning experence and you a good student. What fun, It has never been the 1 oz of expensive wine sample that has put on the pounds it is half a bottle of cheap wine with my buddies at night. I have always love when food and wine have an elegance-No conflict as this is a fun,luxious, learning, planned and mindful treat-just don't get that from Cosco processed foods samples.

Heidi, you keeping working on increasing your exercising- I have been fighting feeling rather crabby latey and ran my tutoring group today. Reading the image of your DD dancing made me thing about how much I enjoyed the young girls I worked with today.-such happiness, energy and enthusiam. Crabbiness gone.

MaryBlu-How can anyone fault you for over indulging one day in the middle of NM winter?. Yes I have become an Calif weakling-I remember the saunas of my MN youth- then rolling in the snow for that heart stopping briskness. I went to Alaska once and met so many people from MN-they joke that they left MN for Alaska in order to warm up. Hope you get a break in the weather soon!!! Glad Beck keeps beconning you back.

Erika-Hurray for a 2 lb loss. You handled the surprise weekend away with mom's cooking and lost weight!!

When at the volunteering at the library-folks noticed I have lost alot of weight-new pants. Normal I just keep wearing the old but rather baggy outfits.-nice to get the aknowledgement. Really feeling like I have made some growth in not eating to soothe-very big for me, I have not dealt (yet in 2008) with next big challenge of being around friends (at a party) and not over eating/drinking. We have had so much rain most folks aren't traveling much.

best to all

sue

hbuchwald
01-30-2008, 11:19 PM
Quick review of the skills from last week:
1. It is crucially important for us to review at least a couple of times per day the reasons we have for losing weight.
2. We have chosen an eating plan and backup in case that one ends up not being right
3. We sit down to eat and eat slowing and mindfully EVERY TIME
4. We give ourselves credit continually for using helpful eating behaviors
5. We catch and respond to sabotaging thoughts that interfere with doing these essential tasks.


“ It is the difference in your thinking that’s going to allow you to make permanent changes in your eating habits. “ Beck p. 96

I think that we have all seen many of these strategies working for us. I know that I truly FEEL like I am making lifestyle changes this time versus “being on a diet” (then I go off the diet… ). Thanks Beck!!!

Day 8: Create Time and Energy

All of the behaviors and thinking behind losing weight require extra energy and time from us. If we don’t plan for that and make the time, it becomes easy to give in to big sabotaging thoughts about not having the time to do what needs to be done. We need to figure out how much time we need to allot for meal planning, food shopping, meal prep, sitting down and eating mindfully, exercising and journaling or doing any other tasks related to our weight loss plans and then to do those things!

Beck suggests writing out a typical workday’s schedule and a typical weekend day schedule. Then we plug in the new tasks that need to be done or delegate/cancel/or cut back on other things to make the new tasks fit in. Our priority is to take care of ourselves. If we have trouble figuring out which activities to cut back on or eliminate, making a priorities chart can help.

This is one of those exercises that I breezed through too quickly. What is my biggest challenge right now? Getting in exercise! I am going to spend some time and prioritize some things to make sure and get that into my schedule. I recently changed the amount of time I was spending on that other web site I mentioned at an earlier time and found a way to prioritize my tasks there to spend my computer time on the things that really matter. I figured out that recording my food and exercise are the most important things on that site. Checking in with this group is another computer use priority. The other site has a points system that I was getting sucked into.. it is ridiculous that I bought into it so much-you get “points” for reading articles, taking polls, drinking 8 glasses of h2o, etc… and the points earn you little tropies that mean NOTHING (this REALLY sounds ridiculous now that I am spelling it out to you). I enjoy reading the articles and some other things on that site but I am now choosing to find articles when I need motivation or ideas for something instead of reading random articles just to get points. I NEED community support (thanks to you all, my coaches) and to have a place to record my food/exercise and I need other resources periodically but that will now be driven by my specific need for information and not on getting a lot of points.

“Losing weight is so important to me that I’m willing to fit my life around the necessary activities (instead of vice versa).” Beck Workbook p. 53

hbuchwald
01-30-2008, 11:33 PM
Bill: Sorry, I don’t know who Tom Brady is either… I like what Sue’s suggestion for allotting yourself the indulgence of a few “somethings” at Whole Foods periodically. What do you think?

Erika and CatR: congrats on the weight loss. Besides all the other ways that it feels good to take off some pounds, to have the scale show a decline can be motivating! Cinnamon tea for your workshop to avoid the goodies-BRILLIANT! Way to think ahead and find something to substitute and help you feel like you are fully participating with the other people.

Sue: What a nice way to change your own perspective and help yourself feel better. It is so hard to teach/tutor when tired or in a “mood”. I will also think of my dd dancing the next time I am crabby at school! Also, I am glad that you got some new pants. Nice that those people noticed your weight loss too- the new pants probably help you feel good/different everytime you wear them. I am feeling sort of “sassy” with my 37 lb weight loss so far-do you feel a big difference after 66? I am trying to enjoy every little benefit that I notice after losing different amounts. It could be having looser clothing or noticing that my face looks a bit younger or that I can reach my feet with less effort than before, etc.. I could go on and on.

Until tomorrow, Heidi

BillBlueEyes
01-31-2008, 07:45 AM
Diet Coaches - I now know … that Super Bowl hype hasn't engulfed absolutely everyone. Tom Brady is the quarterback of the New England Patriots football team that is playing in the Super Bowl on Sunday, 3Feb08, who is continuously hyped in the sports media for many passes completed and for dating a super model.

Thanks Sue, Heidi, and CatR for your inputs on eating at Whole Foods. My correct Response Card remains simply: NO CHOICE, for stuff that is off-plan. My plan already includes occasional samples at Whole Foods when they meet the unusual or pricey criteria, so no changes are needed; the samples on Tuesday met the criteria, so drop the angst, eat, enjoy, and move on.

About Day 8: Create Time and Energy: It's so easy for me to add activities without removing something else to make time. I only recently accepted that I had to drop weekday morning Sudoku to accommodate the time I spend recording my food journal, Beck checklists, and 3FC. It continues to surprise me that making lunches 5 days a week requires time to plan, shop, cook, and prepare.


Sue (CoastalSue) - I love the way you describe the joy of eating; you help me resolve all my puritanical resistance. Kudos for wearing your new pants and gathering the compliments. And kudos for your growth in not eating to soothe. Nice to see the Beck seeping into all of us around here.

MaryBlu - Sending some warm thoughts to you and to your DS's 84 year old Buick, LOL.

Heidi (hbuchwald) - Kudos for your keen awareness of your prioritizing needs. Your review of making time and your own prioritizing also helped me. I am slow to let go of an activity that has some merit when I choose something else of higher priority. I push shopping and food prep to the weekend without taking into account that I use weekends for other activities, including catchup on walking and going to the gym. Gotta remember that prioritizing is the key word. Sending my best support for the type of hard prioritizing required while the parent of a young daughter.

Erika (eusebius) – Waving (quietly, so as not to disturb your practicing).

CatR - KUDOS KUDOS KUDOS for your cinnamon tea success over cookies. LOL at your observation that no one noticed you eating your snack because I've had that same concern. One of my recent Response Cards is: My eating is not the focus of other’s concern; I AM NOT THE CENTER OF EVERYONE’S UNIVERSE. You make a good point; when I was in my major losing phase, I ate ABSOLUTELY NOTHING between meals. It was an important step to add 3 planned snacks, and only after reaching maintenance did I change my food plan to include unusual and expensive samples.

Readers - "I now know … I need to give myself credit every time I do what I’m supposed to do." Beck, pg 13.

__________________
XXXXXXX 7 XXXXXXX 14 XXXXXXX 21 XXXXXXX 28 XXXXXXX 35 XXXXXXX 42
Completed Beck Program-day 42. You’ve met your goal. Congratulations!

CherryAutumn
01-31-2008, 10:31 AM
Well I did days 1-3 together. I made my Response cards and selected my primary diet: Weight Watchers and Secondary: Calorie Counting. Then Day 3 was the eat sitting down. I do fairly well with that except for snacking which i guess is the point. So i will work on that. Yesterday was Day 4 - Give yourself Credit. *Credit* I ate sitting down yesterday everytime but once.

So for today (Day 5) I am going to eat slowly and mindfully

kuhljeanie
01-31-2008, 03:10 PM
Hi everyone,

Been lurking for a day or so (ever since I realized there was a Beck group on 3FC. Don't know why I'm surprised. :)) I'm going one day a day and am on day 13, deliberately skip a meal. I usually eat 6 times a day and haven't had anything since breakfast (that was six hours ago.) I'm starting to get a little lightheaded. Do you think I'm cheating myself if I go ahead and have my afternoon snack? I didn't eat a bigger breakfast than normal, and I'm nursing, and training for a 1/2 marathon. I'm starting to feel a little panicked at this point but I'm also starting to get a little dizzy. Can someone who's done Beck before let me know if her intent is to have us understand what skipping a meal feels like (I've now skipped two) or what it feels like to go all day without eating (she mentions eating breakfast and dinner.) I've been working so hard to do everything she says to the letter, since historically I've thought of myself as someone who can "adjust" here and there, and it hasn't worked for me.

MUCH APPRECIATED!

BillBlueEyes
01-31-2008, 03:26 PM
:welcome: kuhljeanie :welcome:

Welcome to the Beck Diet Solution Discussion Group, Support Group, Diet Coach Group.

And, in case you never got your proper one of these, :wel3fc:

Quick response on the fly here. My take is that the purpose of the skip a meal exercise is to experience 1) that the hunger is really not that overwhelming, and 2) that the hunger goes away. I don't read any value placed by Beck on going all day without food. I do admire your concern about tweaking directions so that you might miss the intent. But here, you've done the exercise, all that remains is to give yourself credit.

In addition to success and being done, all four other things you mention are good reason to go eat, RIGHT NOW: nursing, training for a marathon, feeling light headed, and feeling dizzy. Get yourself some food ASAP and celebrate your success.

Look forward to getting to know you.

__________________
XXXXXXX 7 XXXXXXX 14 XXXXXXX 21 XXXXXXX 28 XXXXXXX 35 XXXXXXX 42
Completed Beck Program-day 42. You’ve met your goal. Congratulations!

CatR
01-31-2008, 07:06 PM
:wave: Kuhljeanie, I found the site last week. I read BDS last Fall, then didn't follow through with it. I gained 4 pounds and got fed up. I had a good eating plan, I had a good exercise plan, but I didn't have the mental skills to deal with my sabotaging thoughts. I am in week two of my eating plan and have really benefited by checking in this forum regularly.

Sue: We have a high Sierra trip planned for August to Lake Ediza. The shortest access is from Mammoth Lake. We will take a couple of lower elevation trips earlier in the summer.:)

I remember why I backed away from the Beck Solution last Fall. She seemed to be maintaining her weight by saying "no" to all desserts and was very controlled in what she did choose to eat. In the Never-Never Land of the chronic dieter, you want to be able to eat without having to constantly make those kind of choices once you have attained the goal. You want to be able to eat like everyone else, overlooking the fact that those individuals tend to be fairly large.

I have also resented taking the time it takes to prepare food and work out. Well, it is time to get over all this nonsense.

wendylan
01-31-2008, 08:33 PM
Hello everyone,just checking in.I have done my Beck and Weight Watchers for everyday except today.I was at the YMCA Mon.,Tues.,Wed and I did well Wed. eve at my family get together with just having one plate of dinner heavy on veggies and one dessert.Weigh in day for me lost 4.8 pounds this week at WW weigh in.All that is great BUT I must confess today was a dismal failure.I was starving by the time I got back from the WW meeting because I hadn't eaten before the meeting.Ate my breakfast and lunch together and never felt full.I think I have been eating almost no fat perhaps that was the problem.
Had pizza and chickenwings for dinner and feel exhausted and in a mood.Total weight loss for the month 9.4 pounds. thanks wendy

kuhljeanie
01-31-2008, 10:31 PM
Thank you Bill and Kat! I'm glad to be here! I've been posting on the Nursing Mommies and YOAD (Dr. Oz) threads for about two weeks, but haven't actually started YOAD since I received my Beck CDs and am going through the first two weeks.

I did eat almost immediately after you gave me "permission", which was a good thing, because I was starting to feel nauseated. At the end of the day I'm still feeling like my execution was lacking. I had such a visceral reaction to the mere idea of skipping a meal, I was determined to really do it right. So I overdid it. The more time passed, the more hungry I felt, and even though I ate at 3:00 pm I ended up with a headache for hours afterwards. I got sick and shakey, and I can't honestly say I feel more secure or less panicked about letting myself be hungry. What do I do with this? I keep coming back to this sabotaging thought that if I'd done it "right", I'd have the same confidence y'all have about being hungry. Instead I'm thinking that when I start to get hungry I REALLY NEED to get food into my body. This does not appear to be Beck's intent.

Sorry about bursting on the scene earlier - I should have introduced myself. :) Name is Jean, I live in Ohio, recently married and I have a baby boy who is quickly approaching his first birthday. I work full time and am also going to graduate school at night. I'm training for my second half marathon in May (I'm a walker) as a way of proving to myself that I have fully recovered from pregnancy and childbirth. Criminy did that do a number on the bod! We're planning a second in the next little while, and I want my new starting weight to be healthy. I'm also borderline hypertensive, which was exacerbated by pregnancy, and didn't serve me in the least.

It might seem insane to be starting a new eating plan with so much going on, but to be perfectly honest with myself, I've always had a lot going on, and if not now, when? I'm also beginning to suspect that having "a lot" going on is another avoidance mechanism. Chronic hyperbusiness is a fabulous excuse for any number of things, and it lets me play superwoman.

So, that's me. My ACR list is on my other laptop - I'm happy to share and will throw it on the thread tomorrow.

One last question - towards the beginning of week 2, I started feeling sad about changing. I find myself eating cake every night not because I want it, I'm not even particularly craving it, but I've got this feeling that if I don't eat this stuff before I'm officially on a diet, it's a kind of betrayal of who I've been for most of my life, and in a sort of twisted way feels like a proper sendoff to someone that I've gotten very attached to. Does that make any sense?

hbuchwald
02-01-2008, 01:22 AM
Good evening everyone,
I have to check in quickly tonight. Ironic since I wrote all about making time for activities for my weight loss plan and I am out of time for checking in tonight! HA!

Went to Costco tonight and ate no samples and ate no dinner food either (dd did and I visited with her while she ate).


A colleague noticed that I had lost weight and we got chatting about healthy living. She asked me if I would want to do the danskin triathlon. Scary thought since I am not a big runner but all legs are short distances (relatively speaking that is..) and it may be a good challenge for me. I will look it up and consider it. I am also looking into ballroom dance classes. I need a fun exercise and something for just me (versus making fun out of something that is really for dd). Fun to think about the possibilities!

Til tomorrow, Heidi

coastalsue
02-01-2008, 03:34 AM
Hello everyone,

Welcome Kuhljeanie- glad to have your imput here on the Beck Forum. BillblueEyes said it perfectly-about the stopping the skipping food exercise. With your reactions so glad you stopped. All diet plans are suggestions and the key to figure out how to modify them for to fit our individual needs. I followed my eating plan trying not to eat treats-only healthy non sugar stuff-results when I was good, I was sooo good, but when I overindugled it was sooo bad. Based on advice others gave me here, I now include 10% of my daily cals for treats-you know the fun stuff with no nutrious value. This is working for me. You response to giving up the cake is so familiar to me-yes food has been a soothing friend to me, it hard to give it and I needed to learn other ways-that is the good thing about Beck-you do learn them and posting here as helped to me to reflex and learn. Give yourself time and changes will happen. I remember I felt dieting was losing a good friend ( the comfort of over eating)-this feeling is being replaced with the greater satisifaction of losing weight and have much great mobilty. I have many set backs, but I am 66 lbs thinner and it feel good.

Heidi, so glad your hard work to lose weight is being noticed-Combining fun, exercise and adult time all sound great-success on finding something. Why no dinner? Thanks for the review of Beck Chapter. All this planning has resulted in my liking food better-needing the much less volumn but really enjoy the best flavors for the smaller amount I do eat. I finally have the beginning of a picky eater. I am too good for cruddy food.

BillBlueeyes-hope your favorite time wins the Superbowl -(unless there is some Calif or MN team playing) I think not. so on Patriots. Sorry your Sudoku time needs to be shorten-one of my favored time passers-but I also make a effort to limit the amount. The time for meal prep is a hugh amount-everything fresh, from scratch ect-I miss the convience of pre-made or drive thur the window foods-don't miss the taste tho. Just noticed that a food processor(chop thoses veggies) was on sale in Santa Rosa .-don't think I can get down any time soon-much rain, lots of flooding and road closures. Again thank you so much for continuing to include this forum as part of your daily schedule. You are such an important part of this place!

CatR-Yup agree the prep times gets old, but now notice some other foods taste oily, salty, and thicken with flour. At least for all the work we do get good taste. I have some evening with some lower cal frozen meals. Love Calif kitchen Pizza-check the box some much lower cal.
As a family we camp every summer for two weeks up at Wright's lake in the Sierras-off 50 around Kyberz-then took day trips into Desolation Valley. Have a great tme on your trip.

CherryAutmn-After much practice I love eating slowly and mindfully. things can taste so good if I take the time to slowly chew them. In the beginning this stuff was annoying-it took many months to automatically do this, along with a set place to eat. I could be a speed eater and drive down the road. One of the side benefits for me, is that I have much fewer food stains on my clothing-none in the car. Let us know how it goes.

WendyLan-good plan for the family meal-NIce weight loss for the month. Tonight meal was just one meal-not a dismal failure-you went to the y 3x, lost over 9lb -much credit for alot of successes. An occassional overindulgence is just Oh Well-Good time for questions-do I need more fat? Short time between meals?, Is there lower cal pizza-I love it also?, fewer wings?, rest?ect. With time you will figure out ways to do it and keep the cals down.

Erika and MaryBlu-big hi to you folks-may the weather get better soon.

I also been fight "the Mood" There has been no sun for days-much much rain and alot of minor road flooding-nothing too serious just have no business leaving our area. Naturally the more we should not travel the more I want to go. Hoping this crabby attitude soon passes. I am working tomarrow and already some of co-workers are not coming in due to road flooding or the serious likelhood of it. There is literally only one road to use-when a creek covers it you are not getting home for a couple of days. Yesterday late last night I ate about 250 cals of unnecessary nuts-good new I got ucky heart burn from them. It was a no win situation-I really didn't want the stuff, I knew I trying to feel "better" as this is what I always did in the past to feel better-knew it would not work and yes it did not make me feel better. I still did it any way. Weird Weird credit went back to and stayed on plan today.

sue

BillBlueEyes
02-01-2008, 06:56 AM
This discussion continues on The Beck Diet Solution – February 2008 – Group for Support, Discussion, Diet Coach ( http://www.3fatchicks.com/forum/showthread.php?t=133223)

__________________
XXXXXXX 7 XXXXXXX 14 XXXXXXX 21 XXXXXXX 28 XXXXXXX 35 XXXXXXX 42
Completed Beck Program-day 42. You’ve Met your goal. Congratulations!