100 lb. Club - I'm back and somewhat depressed.




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althepirate
12-22-2007, 05:09 PM
Although I can't say I didn't really see this coming, but I fell off the wagon. I had lost a total of about 15.5 lbs....and have gained it all back.

I stopped checking this forum...stopped working out....went back to my old eating habits....


So....I'm now starting over again from the beginning. The one thing that's different now is that I know it's possible.....

I'm ashamed of myself :(


Heather
12-22-2007, 05:31 PM
Oh honey, I know exactly how you feel. I've done that MANY times before.

You have to forgive yourself and move on. It often helps to try to figure out what started the slide and what continued it so that it doesn't happen again!! At least if you learn something from the experience you get something out of it.

This is a lifelong struggle, but I have to believe it's possible to make permanent changes!

You know one thing you need to do: keep coming back here!! :)

Trazey34
12-22-2007, 07:19 PM
pfffft to feeling ashamed!!! to heck with that! shame is no no no!!!!

15 pounds isn't the end of the world -- you're back, you're ready, you know you can do it, i say hold your head HIGH, pat yourself on the back for admitting a slip and not letting it completely overwhelm you!

Glad to see you back :)


rockinrobin
12-22-2007, 08:05 PM
Ashamed of yourself? Awww, come on. We've all been there - MANY, MANY times. Because we're all human. And losing weight is one of the hardest things in the world to do.

Take a deep breath. Formulate a plan. Set yourself up for success. And get back to it!!! You'll be on the losing end of it again before you know it. You'll forget all about your recent gain. You CAN reverse it.

And please stick around. If you feel yourself slipping, we're all here to help you up. :)

Cheree
12-22-2007, 08:47 PM
You're not alone!!! I have done the same thing (actually many times)... I'm going to start anew and not worry about the past. Tomorrow is a new day - don't beat yourself up for what happened in the past. The past you cannot change, the now and the future you can change! :hug:

KrisR
12-22-2007, 09:44 PM
Yeah, I'm guessing most of us can relate. Me? I can relate 10 fold or more. As others have said, the key is your back. Your ready. You know what works. And, you've got all of us to cheer you on!

althepirate
12-22-2007, 11:01 PM
Thanks guys....I've been under so much stress lately. One of the reasons I fell off the wagon was [a] I'm an insurance agent who specializes in Medicare and we're in the Annual Election right now, and [b] my boyfriend can't hold down a job. I'm paying for all the bills as well as his child support right now.

I love him, we've been together a long time, and it's just a rough spot [granted a long one - 4 months without a real job] but I feel like I shouldn't be stressing out over money when I make so much right now.

To top it all off....my apartment is a wreck and it's a trial to get him to help clean. He does dishes....and that's about it.

I'm just so tired and stressed and depressed since I gained the weight back that I worked so hard to lose.....I feel like I can't get out of bed some mornings, but I know I have to get up and go to work since I'm the only one actually making money right now.

I just don't know what to do....I have school coming up in the spring and I struggling to make ends meet to pay for my tuition come January 8. I'll do it, I don't know how, but I'll do it.

I feel like if I stop moving, if I look back, I won't start up again.




.....sorry. Long vent. It's been a rough month. :(

Sandi
12-23-2007, 12:07 AM
:hug: The one thing you CAN'T do is give up!!! You have to believe you can do it...Decide to do it...and then JUST DO IT!!!

We have all been there a THOUSAND times. Starting over is the 1st step!

JayEll
12-23-2007, 06:49 AM
Hang in there! Make sure your plan is number one priority!

Just one off topic comment... You do not have to pay his child support... it could be that he's getting a little complacent and really doesn't feel the need to look too hard for work... because after all, you're paying...

'Nuff said there! Let's focus on you--get back to your workouts as soon as you can! Set a date when you're back on the food plan! You can reverse this trend, you really can. Like you, I gained weight back a few times before I got the picture this time. :cheer2: Keep with it!

Jay

tkdkathy
12-23-2007, 11:58 AM
Hang in there, honey. You are dealing with a LOT. It is admirable that you came back. Try to be kind to you. I am kind of in the same boat, but quitting is just not an option. We are worth taking care of. Is there someone you can talk to about the pressures you feel? Best of luck. This is a great place to come for support. Take care.

ChrissyBean
12-23-2007, 03:25 PM
Your boyfriend needs a shake, sweetie. :(

Anyway, enough about him. Don't be so hard on yourself and welcome back! You'll be down that 15 pounds PLUS in no time. :hug:

Jen
12-23-2007, 05:14 PM
Don't be ashamed!!! Be proud of yourself that you lost that much weight to begin with...at least you know you can do it. I've never kept any significant amount of weight off ever and that leaves me more than somewhat depressed but you know I just soldier on, that's all I can do.

rakel
12-23-2007, 05:18 PM
I know exactly how you are feeling right now, my fiance has been looking for a job since October, and I actually have my own business doing freelance work, and it's been rather dry this month, so now I too am in the job hunting business (going on my second interview on the 26th, looks encouraging but I'm not counting my chickens before they are hatched) ... all I know is that is DEFINITELY very very frustrating and discouraging but life will move on. Trying to coax a fiance/boyfriend who is unemployed is frustrating too, you know I end up doing most of the housework and cooking as well. I hate to say it, but I think a lot of men needs LOTS of nudging to get things done, especially if they are down about jobs and stuff... because they tend to want to do nothing but play video games and watch TV, it's just a self-defeating circle. And despite all of these challenges, I'm still trying to eat reasonably healthy for the price, and get my exercise in when I can -- you CAN do it, I know, because since I've lost about 4lbs this past week after a few months of taking 2 steps forwards and 1.75 back.

Also, is there anything you can do about the child support issue? Maybe have your boyfriend talk to his divorce lawyer about his current situation, maybe he can get a break for a few months until he is on his feet again. I'm sure maybe something can be worked out, even if he has to make up for it for a few months by paying extra once he has his job. I'm not really sure about these things myself, I don't have much experience with it even though my parents were divorced, but it may be something worth looking into, or at least discussing with the mother if she is friendly enough.

althepirate
12-23-2007, 06:28 PM
He's doing better. I gave him a verbal "shake" as ChrissyBean put it, and he's been cleaning all day. He's also got a gig on Christmas Eve, so that'll cover us for money for a couple weeks.

I feel better today. I was very down yesterday....thanks to all you ladies who commented :) It's very much appreciated.

Rakel, the mother is bat sh*t insane and the cause of almost all the drama in my life. Talking to her isn't that big of an option. That would be too...rational for her tastes.

Thanks ladies :) I remember why I love this board.

rakel
12-23-2007, 09:07 PM
althepirate, unfortunately that is what happens a lot when it comes to broken relationships where children are involved. It's hard to imagine the two people ever in a relationship together or coexisting somewhat peacefully.

It's good that you got him to realize that you need some help, and that he was able to get a gig to help with some of the financial strain -- I think sometimes they just don't realize the stress they put on us women... and we do tend to stress out over everything.

I get so worried and upset that it makes it so hard to even stand it some days, but I'm still here, I'm still alive, I still have a roof over my head and a family that loves me. I still have a lot of things to be thankful for, and I'm sure the same goes for you! It's important to remind ourselves of these things because if we don't we can very easily become bitter and feel like the world owes us something.

I try to remain positive even though it's really a challenge to do so every day... besides, who likes to be around someone who complains all of the time?

althepirate
12-24-2007, 06:02 PM
Rakel, exactly! That is exactly how I feel! I try so hard to stay afloat and I'm constantly looking for that silver lining....it justs drags and pulls sometimes.

I don't ever want to lose sight of all the good things in life....

math puppy
12-28-2007, 03:56 AM
totally been there, acutally im there right now! lol
just remember, the more times you try, the more likely you are to sucessed!!
im feeling good about this time around! you?

althepirate
12-28-2007, 11:49 AM
Actually, I am too! I'm forcing myself to weigh myself every morning like I was before to keep my mind on track for the day as well as checking and posting on this forum.

Both of those help keep me in the mindset, so even if I'm not doing anything special that day, I'm still keeping myself in check.