Weight Loss Support - What are we really hungry for? Jan 19th, 2002

01-19-2002, 10:20 AM
Lose weight without dieting? HOW?!?!

By getting to the root of why you overeat in the first place! "Why Weight," written by Geneen Roth, is a non-diet book that contains exercises designed to help compulsive eaters learn how to stop using food as a substitute for handling difficult emotions or situations. You'll also learn how to enjoy eating and still lose weight naturally. This program offers reassuring guidelines on:

-- kicking the scale-watching habit forever
-- learning to say no
-- discovering other pleasures besides food
-- learning the difference between physical and emotional hunger
-- listening to and trusting your body's hunger and fullness signals

Each week at least one exercise will be posted and you are encouraged to share your answers, thoughts, etc..

Please share any insight, ideas, articles or other information that you may have.

Join us in Breaking Free from Compulsive Eating!

01-19-2002, 10:22 AM
Exercise 25: Plunges into Oblivion

Binges are ways in which we allow ourselves to go unconscious, to get away from the concerns of day-to-day life and plunge into oblivion for a few minutes. If we developed other ways to meet that need, our desire to binge would lessen.

I believe that we all need to tune out, to retreat or disappear from view at least once a day, and that we ought to make a commitment to ourselves to do this – or else we will become too busy with the should and have-tos to remember the want –tos.

Commit yourself to fifteen-minute plunge every day. Here are some examples:
Monday Watch “All My Children”
Tuesday Read the first two chapters of a novel
Wednesday Take an African dance class
Thursday See a Katharine Hepburn movie
Friday Write in my journal for an hour
Saturday Get a facial
Sunday Hug and kiss the cat

It’s your turn:


01-19-2002, 12:58 PM
This exercise makes an interesting point about binges as a route to oblivion. I believe this is entirely true. Food can act as a drug to distract us from responsibilities and problems or to change mood. I personally don't think this is a bad thing in moderation. I believe it is one of the legitimate uses of food and that nature designed it that way. It becomes a bad thing (like alcohol or drugs) when abused.

This exercise also, to me, is related to Sprite's post in the last thread that she believes sometimes a binge is the only way to gain satiety because it fulfills a physical need. I agree with this and have always worked what I call "controlled splurges" into my plan. I think they serve a purpose that is both emotional and physical. Many popular "diet" plans such as Body For Life advocate a cheat day and these are useful in allowing release and ensuring adherence the rest of the time.

But my "splurges" become a problem when they continue past the stage where they are supposed to stop, and that is where I think I may be seeking oblivion. I know for the past two weeks I've been trying to escape the completion of an assignment I'm having problems with (writer's block!). In fact, here I am typing away on 3FC when I need to finish said assignment in an hour or so! :devil: I'm also eating donuts! So ...

The 15-Minute Plunge Into Oblivion: The easy answer is I can take an extra 15-minute jog/walk each day. Exercise always takes me to a place far, far away from wherever I am and literally makes me a new person for awhile. So I think that's my answer for the whole seven days.

Other ideas are 15 extra minutes of reading my current novel; an extra 15 minutes of sitting on the floor hugging my animals and telling them how great they are; 15 extra minutes of sitting in the car just thinking before I come into the house (I do this a lot already); 15 extra minutes of internet surfing; 15 extra minutes of looking through my extensive tatting book collection for ideas on what I might like to tat; 15 extra minutes working on increasing my fiction writing output as opposed to the joyless and endless magazine articles that I don't really relate to.

Lots more! I could fill two lifetimes with non-food oblivion behaviors, but in the end, I think, I'd binge anyway.

01-20-2002, 12:16 PM
Things I will do for a 15 minute plunge into oblivion:

1. Drink a case of beer (just kidding, I don't even drink I am allergic to alcohol)

2. Have a nice hot, bubble bath complete with candles and sound machine.

3. Exercise

4. Read my novel

5. Deep breathing exercises

6. Talk on the phone

7. Surf the net

8. Go to a movie

9. Go shopping

10. Have coffee with a friend

11. Work

12. Listen to music

01-20-2002, 12:21 PM
Crone I agree that like anything "everything in moderation" should be the way. Food in and of itself is not the problem it is how much I shovel into my mouth.

From the book “The Solution”

Please pause for a moment and use the checklist to face, feel and let fade the essential pain of losing weight. Read each statement slowly. Notice the feelings that arise in you and watch them fade. This is a time to face the essential pain of weight loss and to let those feelings fade away.

In order to solve my weight problem, I am willing to accept the essential pain that I must:
Put limits on my eating.
Exercise daily, even at times when I don’t feel like it.
Journey inside myself throughout the day.
Nurture myself in ways other than overeating
Set more reasonable expectations for myself.
Feel compassionate and accepting toward my body and myself.
Take good care of my health.
Engage in activities that are meaningful to me.
Take time to restore my mind, body, and soul.

Now your expectations are more reasonable – neither too high nor too low – and you can go forward expecting neither too much nor too little of yourself and life. In essence you know your limits and have the skill to set them. It is the perfect time to conduct lifestyle surgery, to make basic, enduring changes in your life.

Where you move your scalpel, and how deep or wide the cut, is completely individual. You are an adult. You know what you can and can’t take anymore. You recognize what does and doesn’t’ work for you.

By making a conceptual decision to change something, you give your decision staying power. You can better protect yourself day to day and will no longer be burdened with situations that do not foster your health and happiness.

Stand back from your life for a few minutes and ask youself, “What limits must I set so that I will be happier and healthier?”

This really resonated with me. I don’t think I have ever looked at these things as “decisions” I make to lose weight and keep it off but as something forced on me. So, no wonder I fight each and every one of them. Just by reading this I feel much differently towards each item on the checklist. Aren’t we funny and complicated creatures!

01-20-2002, 01:22 PM
Yup, that shoveling is my main problem, too, LLB! :)

However, my plan for the week is to reduce the excess sugary stuff I eat. I've been noticing that it does trigger binges lately, more so than it used to. To that end, I've kicked my beloved slimfast off the menu. Since I love canned meal replacements, though, I bought some low glycemic ones formulated for diabetics (of which I am not one). I also bought some glucose tablets to chew when I get that weird sinking feeling. They beat a candy bar in effectiveness and are only 15 calories.

I'm printing your last post to paste in my journal. I especially like the phrase: "Stand back from your life ..." I really need to do that.

But I think I'm weird because I don't find losing weight to be a pain. I LOVE dieting and think it is a game. This is a possible source for my inability to lose the LAST 10 POUNDS after easily dropping 100-plus! I may be bingeing in order to continue my focus on losing versus a focus on living healthfully and maintaining a sane weight.

I bought a new journal today and like the Chinese Proverb on the first page I opened: "If we keep a green bough in our heart, the singing bird will come."

I sure hope it gets here soon.

01-20-2002, 01:41 PM
Thank you so much Ladybug for posting the excerpt from The Solution. I guess I was in the right frame of mind when I read it because it really hit home with me. A feeling of peace came over me when I read it. I am in control. I know what does and doesn't work for me and what will make me happy. I am an individual. This is a choice I am making. I can trust myself to honor my self promises.

Thanks again!

Crone Try and think of maintaining your weight as the ultimate challenge in the game. You seem to like to challenge yourself so tell yourself you are ready for the hardest level of the game now.

01-20-2002, 02:47 PM
Sprite GREAT suggestion for Crone. That is the ultimate, isn't it, to maintain once at the weight you want to be at.

I felt like you did - I have always fought the idea that I had to accept "diet" changes. Looking at it this way clicked...

Crone I too liked the Stand back from your life for a few minutes and ask youself, “What limits must I set so that I will be happier and healthier?”

I was just thinking how, for example, people would say "I can't drink coffee late in the day or night because I won't be able to sleep." I would say, "Oh I can drink it right up to when I go to bed. It doesn't bother me." Other people set limits in their lives all the time but because I didn't have to I didn't set limits on anything. This helped point out to me that other people (slim people even) set limits in their lives, it is just on
different things than what I need to. This is rather embarrassing :o because I should know this!!!

I am much smarter in other areas of my life - with this eating issue it is like I feel brain dead.:mad:

01-21-2002, 01:06 PM
It’s your turn:

Monday – exercise – look through gardening books and the internet for planting ideas for Spring

Tuesday– exercise – read (I read during my lunch hour but never when I get home from work but is so relaxing for me that I will read more of the book I am currently reading this evening)

Wednesday– exercise – Watch a movie

Thursday– exercise – write a letter

Friday– exercise - Stamp

Saturday– exercise – Check out the cars at the dealership ( I need to get a newer one)

Sunday– exercise - Needlework

Off to accomplish Monday!!!!

01-22-2002, 09:46 PM
Bringing to the top so we don't get pushed off the first page!! lol

01-23-2002, 08:47 AM
Quote:Each time we act on our habits we reinforce the impulse.

Really, scary when I think that everytime I eat unhealthily I really am encouraging myself to do it again.

01-23-2002, 01:46 PM
LLB: You've lost 11 pounds since Jan. 1! :) WTG!

"Quote: Each time we act on our habits we reinforce the impulse."

This can't be repeated too many times. The concept has a positive as well as negative effect: Each time we resist overeating by so much as one cookie, we strengthen our willpower. Each and every time.

I feel the modern approach to "willpower" is to say the word is negative; that it doesn't exist or doesn't help or leads to compulsion or CRE (Chronic Restrained Eating ... which some 'experts' think is a bad thing and some think is a good thing). To me, though, willpower just means discretion and self-discipline, without which my life is chaos and in relation to food, without which my weight goes up.

So whenever the urge hits to just say yes to a binge, there's always a good reason to just say no! :lol:

If I say no today, it strengthens my belief that I can say no tomorrow.

01-24-2002, 08:39 AM
Crone I liked willpower just means discretion and self-discipline because it says I have the power.

Have a happy Thursday!

01-25-2002, 11:53 PM
Hi! My name is Lorraine and I'm working towards changing my life. The past few weeks I've been looking inside to decide what keeps this weight on me and what makes it so hard to let go. I stumbled onto this support forum (I post regularly on the general board) and decided to focus on some of the exercises here. I've gone back through the threads and tried to collect all of them and I will work on them on my own in addition to keeping up with the new ones posted. I'm also working through the Louise Hay book "You Can Heal Your Life" as I reshape my mindset in regards to food and weight. If you've got room for one more, I'd love to join you and work through these exercises!

I manage to take a plunge everyday, but only if my son and husband cooperate. Often I'm willing to put myself on the back burner in order to see to their needs. It fulfills a need in myself to be seen as worthwhile (by taking care of others) but it neglects the most important project...me.

Saturday - Nice bubble bath (I read that from someone else's and thought it sounded delicious!)
Sunday - Yoga practice
Monday - Read my new magazine
Tuesday - Yoga, nap with my son, WW meeting
Wednesday - Stop for a coffee after the Market
Thursday - Yoga, journalling
Friday - Yoga, rent a movie that I want to see

I've started with Saturday as that is tomorrow...and let me tell ya, I am looking forward to that bubble bath!

And I'm looking forward to getting to know all of you...thanks for the exercises...I know they will help me on this journey.

01-26-2002, 12:18 AM
Lorraine: Hello! :) I like your sig from Aristotle. Sometimes I think that everything in life is just habit. As mentioned above, every single time we resist departing from our program or bingeing or doing anything self-destructive, we reinforce that good habit and maximize our chances to succeed, I think.

A bubble bath sounds nice. I wish I had hot water (don't ask) so I could take one, too! As it is, I'm taking a cold shower and settling on the couch with Old Dog and my silly cat and a mystery novel and hot chocolate (ugar free swiss miss).

I'm having trouble typing on here again. Don't know why.

01-26-2002, 09:47 AM
Lorraine Happy to have you....if you missed any of the exercies I have them and could PM them to you. Let me know.

01-26-2002, 12:25 PM
I'm sure you will enjoy this thread and get alot out of it.

Lucky Ladybug I just noticed your numbers . Are you already below your Feb. 14th goal? Way to go ! That is just excellent. When you are ahead of your goal you know you really have a handle on things. You give me hope.

Crone: I know you said not to ask but Why no hot water. That would be so hard. Hopefully that is not going to last long.

I am down 1 pound this week! I had to work my butt off but I did it! I was getting a little discouraged but persevered.

I strongly agree with Lorraine and Crone that alot of this is a habit thing and reinforcing good behaviour. The more we say no the stronger we get and the easier it gets. If you constantly cheat on your diet you will not trust yourself and it will be harder and harder to believe that you can do it.

01-26-2002, 03:36 PM
Please do not post here but go to What are we really hungry for? Jan 26th, 2002