General chatter - another "funny" to make you smile




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freeqeegrl
10-11-2007, 02:35 AM
http://i169.photobucket.com/albums/u238/freeqeegrl/elephantintheway.jpg


veggielover
10-11-2007, 09:09 AM
Has anyone seen the one when the chemistry student was asked a bonus question on whether or not **** was endothermic or exothermic and then he proposed several standard conditions and scenarios?

Here is is from Colby College:

Fun Wth Entropy: Thermodynamics of ****
A thermodynamics professor had written a take home exam for his graduate students. It had one question: Is **** exothermic (giving off heat) or endothermic (taking in or absorbing heat)? Support your answer with a proof.
Most of the students wrote proofs of their beliefs using Boyle's Law or some variant. One student, however, wrote the following:

First, we postulate that if souls exist, then they must have some mass. If they do, then a mole of souls can also have a mass. So, at what rate are souls moving into **** and at what rate are souls leaving? I think that we can safely assume that once a soul gets to ****, it will not leave. Therefore, no souls are leaving. As for souls entering ****, let's look at the different religions that exist in the world today. Some of these religions state that if you are not a member of their religion, you will go to ****. Since there are more than one of these religions and people do not belong to more than one religion, we can project that all people and all souls go to ****. With birth and death rates as they are, we can expect the number of souls in **** to increase exponentially. Now, we look at the rate of change in volume in ****. Boyle's Law states that in order for the temperature and pressure in **** to stay the same, the ratio of the mass of souls and volume needs to stay constant.

A1: So, if **** is expanding at a slower rate than the rate at which souls enter ****, then the temperature and pressure in **** will increase until all **** breaks loose.
A2: Of course, if **** is expanding at a rate faster than the increase of souls in ****, then the temperature and pressure will drop until **** freezes over.

So which is it? If we accept the postulate given to me by Therese Banyan during Freshman year, that "it will be a cold night in **** before I sleep with you" and take into account the fact that I still have not succeeded in having sexual relations with her, then A2 cannot be true, and **** is exothermic.


The student got the only A.

Goldia
10-11-2007, 10:40 AM
These are great! It's good to start the day with a laugh. Thank's Ladies:rofl:


Goldia
10-11-2007, 04:45 PM
Okay, I have another for you.

Wife or Mistress
A doctor, a lawyer and a mathematician were discussing the relative merits of having a wife or a mistress.

The lawyer says: "For sure a mistress is better. If you have a wife and want a divorce, it causes all sorts of legal problems.

The doctor says: "It's better to have a wife because the sense of security lowers your stress and is good for your health.

The mathematician says: "You're both wrong. It's best to have both so that when the wife thinks you're with the mistress and the mistress thinks you're with your wife --- you can do some mathematics.:dizzy:

freeqeegrl
05-14-2009, 06:04 PM
ha ha