100 lb. Club - Interesting day....




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sockmonkey70
09-01-2007, 09:40 PM
I think something is wrong with me...I went shopping today..Had some extra money and all my clothes are falling off..I had NO nice clothes to wear, and several things coming up that I need some dressy clothes for. Go to my favorite store...Old Navy, cheap enough to not feel bad lol...Pick up some 16 shorts/petites in various styles of pant...All too big...So I have graduated down to a 14 in Old Navy land (which probably is like an 18 at a normal store LOL, but the vanity sizing and affordablility keeps me coming back)...

The thing is, I look in the mirror, and I see myself fatter than ever. My boobs look smaller, my belly is still poking out..I just feel like I LOOK like crap. I thought I was supposed to look smaller as my pant sized dropped, but I honestly feel like I look fatter than I did at a tight size Old Navy 20. I KNOW that is not possible..There HAS to be a difference between a 20 and a 14. I just WISH I could see it.

OK I vented. Go away tears..


WinterStarzz
09-01-2007, 09:44 PM
It is hardest for us to see it, because we are living it. The small changes don't feel big, the lost weight doesn't go quickly. It's tough, but you know you are losing weight, you know your body is changing. You can buy a smaller pant size! That is awesome! Sometimes our brain sucks and plays tricks on us, sometimes mirrors are not our friend, but close your eyes and FEEL how different you are. Feel the smaller pants, the smaller waist. You are doing an excellent job, and your hard work is paying off...keep it up!

xFLUFFYx
09-01-2007, 09:55 PM
hiya sockmonkey...omg...a size 14...wow..that is awesome!!

Unfortunatly..the person losing the weight is usually the last one to see how much progress they have made...but I am sure that everyone else around you see's it...

Wipe those tears away! You are doing absolutly wonderful...I am very proud of you. Believe me, you do NOT look like crap...quite the opposite..your a very beautiful gal :hug:


bargoo
09-01-2007, 10:07 PM
35 pounds lost!!!!!!!That is a great achievment,

WinterStarzz
09-01-2007, 10:40 PM
I second Fluffy, you are truly beautiful.

CLCSC145
09-01-2007, 10:47 PM
Crazy eyes and brains! I had a similar feeling yesterday. Area #1 shrinks and I get excited, then area #2 next to area #1 that I was comparing #1 against shrinks too and it feels like I'm back to my original shape. What is hard to see is that OVERALL my body is getting smaller. We just can't get frustrated by the tiny tricks our brains and eyes play on us. You are shrinking, plain and simple!

sockmonkey70
09-01-2007, 10:47 PM
Thank you guys for the support :hug:

It's just so frustrating to know I am making progress, but I am blind to it. I still see the same person in the mirror I saw back in March. Stupid Crazy Brain.

Gale02
09-01-2007, 11:07 PM
You're doing a great job, Mary! I know it's hard to see sometimes since our shape really doesn't change much. Keep up the good work and trust those of us that tell you you're looking fabulous!!

NickiB68
09-01-2007, 11:47 PM
Hang in there Mary! You are doing so good! To go from a 20 to a 14 is an affirmation of your hard work. You will see it! I think this is where 'before' pictures come in handy. You would be able to see the difference then. The people around you see it, so when a friend/co-worker/family member recognizes it....please believe them and smile. Be proud of your progress! :hug:

shelby897
09-01-2007, 11:50 PM
It's like watching an ice cube melt!! If you see it the whole time, you swear it's the same size when it is getting smaller, but someone who goes away from it and comes back in 10 minutes will notice the difference!!

You see yourself everyday, so it's all gradual to you -- if only we could have a life size poster of our "old selves" like they have at the movie theater to stand behind, we could definiately see the difference!!!

Cassie501107
09-02-2007, 12:32 PM
Hang in there, your eyes will catch up with your body eventually. :hug:

You're doing fantastic.

Bouncing
09-02-2007, 01:55 PM
Mary, I haven't worn a 14 in thirty years. I'd be crying too, but for a different reason. Oh, if only we could summon our old self to stand next to our new self in the mirrir. As often as needed. Got any before pics? Take a new one in the same pose, wearing clothes that fit well, and compare. That should bring enuf objectivity to make you feel good.

MandiK
09-02-2007, 07:30 PM
Go find a picture of yourself when you wore that size 20... I'll bet you see some differences after looking at that!

lalique
09-02-2007, 07:51 PM
Hang in there! You'll probably look in the mirror someday (very soon), and be like "wow, what happened?!?" You'll see it all at once!! It will be great!

Just keep up the good job, and don't give up! :hug:

LeedaRenee
09-02-2007, 08:35 PM
I saw your progress pics, you are definitely smaller!! In my case, I know I get a lot more critical of myself. I start feeling good when the scale goes down and then wonder why I still have fatty areas and the seem to be twice the size they were. You are doing great, try not to be discouraged and keep up the great work!

hellokitty81668
09-02-2007, 08:37 PM
:hug:
When you are heavy and start getting the weight off, I think it is hard to accept it. You have gone from a 20 to a 14!! that is a great thing. You should be so proud.
cheryl

sockmonkey70
09-02-2007, 09:30 PM
I think I am just wallowing in self pity LOL. I feel like I am failing because even though I have lost weight, I am only LESS fat...I am STILL so big.
But the thing is, I know that I am not a failure at this. I have been consistantly losing weight for 5 months now. I guess I am just screwed up in the head. Thank you girls so much for lsitening to me whine all the time :)

traci in training
09-02-2007, 10:34 PM
It's hard, isn't it? I've been feeling really good about my appearance until today. Took daughter and friend shopping for homecoming dresses and sat on a chair in the mirror area. Noticed my legs are still huge. HUGE! I may have collar bones and shoulder bones and be down to a size large shirt and size 16 jeans, but I'm still fat. Almost 60 pounds down but I'm still obese on the BMI and I'm still FAT! Just sucks. But at least I'm going in the right direction and I am less fat. I'll get to not fat eventually.

Oh - and I wear 14's at old navy, too. I sure like that number even if i know it's not real!

Sheila53
09-02-2007, 11:06 PM
Body image is an interesting thing, isn't it? Denial when we are fat, and denial when we're less fat. I can really relate, Mary. Sad to say, but even after almost a year at a healthy BMI, when I look at photos of myself, what I see is fat in places I don't want fat. So you're definitely not alone. While I'm sure that doesn't really help, perhaps a :hug: and a good, old-fashioned pity party will. :)

LaurieDawn
09-03-2007, 04:21 AM
I was nodding when I read these posts because that's exactly how I've been feeling lately. I have felt so good about my progress. I'm now finally shaped like a woman again! For the last twenty pounds or so, I've felt better and better with each pound that left. Then - a few days ago - I started going through the angst of "How did I let myself get so big?", etc., and like you, I can't get the fact out of mind that though I am thinner, I am still not thin. Thank you for sharing your frustration. I feel so much less alone.

Although - Sheila - I believe I'm going to block your post out of my mind for the next fifty pounds or so. I want to believe that I will feel skinny AND gorgeous every day when I hit my goal weight, and I am not ready to be disillusioned on that quite yet. I just know Victoria's Secret will be looking for new models at about the time that I will feel like being photographed in my underwear!!!

Sheila53
09-03-2007, 12:04 PM
Although - Sheila - I believe I'm going to block your post out of my mind for the next fifty pounds or so.

Please do!! :D I probably shouldn't have said anything, AND I speak only for myself. Body image has always been an issue for me, and as everyone always says, your problems (of the mental and emotional kind) really don't disappear when you lose weight. Oh, dang--that's another downer, too! I'm banning myself from this thread.

CLCSC145
09-03-2007, 04:26 PM
Please do!! :D I probably shouldn't have said anything, AND I speak only for myself. Body image has always been an issue for me, and as everyone always says, your problems (of the mental and emotional kind) really don't disappear when you lose weight. Oh, dang--that's another downer, too! I'm banning myself from this thread.

I think it's important to acknowledge that fact now, though, Sheila! When I got down into the normal range the last time I lost all of this, I also still had body image issues, which was disappointing to me, and made it somewhat easier to gain it back. To do all the work and still not feel good about my body was a let down.

What I've learned since then is that losing weight doesn't change your thinking, you have to do that work in conjunction with the weight loss. You have to learn to love yourself and appreciate your "packaging" lumps and sags and all. It's something I've started to work on and I'm not there yet. It's important for people to know that losing weight doesn't magically render our lives perfect. Our lives are still imperfect, but in a healthier package. And that's still a good thing.

LaurieDawn
09-03-2007, 05:21 PM
You guys are right, CC and Sheila. I was just playing. And I certainly don't want to discourage ANYONE from posting, particularly those who have mastered skills that I'm trying to obtain. But, if it's all right with y'all, I'm going to hold on to my Victoria's Secret fantasy for the next forty or fifty pounds, THEN I'll worry about learning to realistically accept myself. **SIGH**

CLCSC145
09-03-2007, 05:35 PM
Oh Laurie!!! Don't get me wrong, I have fantasies of being a supermodel myself at the end of all this!! haa haa. Can you blame me? I'm human and a girl. :D If it gets us through these loooong months, then it's fun and worth it, so long as we figure out how to not be disappointed when the contracts don't come in the mail when we reach goal, right? :D

LaurieDawn
09-03-2007, 05:44 PM
You just can't do it, can you, CC? Your post would have been GREAT if you hadn't added the "so long as we figure out..." part. :nono: We'll get through these loooong months together, then we'll briefly console each other before figuring out new and exciting career goals IF we don't see the contracts... ;)

sockmonkey70
09-03-2007, 07:40 PM
Hey I wanna join the supermodel club!!!

We can do this girls! I think I am over my rough patch for the month (hopefully) so I can get back to kicking butt now :p

CLCSC145
09-03-2007, 08:08 PM
You just can't do it, can you, CC? Your post would have been GREAT if you hadn't added the "so long as we figure out..." part. :nono: We'll get through these loooong months together, then we'll briefly console each other before figuring out new and exciting career goals IF we don't see the contracts... ;)

Alright, alright. I give in! But if we're going to do this, we need to think BIG. You and Mary and I will all become famous supermodels and inspire the rest of the country to put down their Krispy Kremes, hit the treadmill, and make the obesity crisis a thing of the past. :D We'll be immortalized in bronze statues in Washington D.C.! :D Streets will be renamed in our honor! :D Children will be named after us! :D History books will praise our efforts! :D Oprah will ditch Bob Greene and beg us to be her diet and fitness gurus! :D Ah, that'll keep me going for at LEAST a week. :joker:

tingirl
09-03-2007, 08:15 PM
You guys crack me up! I've been so busy at work lately that I'm using Labor Day to catch up with everyone.

Mary - You are so beautiful inside and out and your mind will catch up with the weighloss, but it does take a while. I'm still waiting for mind to catch up, but I'm a lot older and slower so no worries for you :)

LaurieDawn
09-03-2007, 09:57 PM
Alright, alright. I give in! But if we're going to do this, we need to think BIG. You and Mary and I will all become famous supermodels and inspire the rest of the country to put down their Krispy Kremes, hit the treadmill, and make the obesity crisis a thing of the past. :D We'll be immortalized in bronze statues in Washington D.C.! :D Streets will be renamed in our honor! :D Children will be named after us! :D History books will praise our efforts! :D Oprah will ditch Bob Greene and beg us to be her diet and fitness gurus! :D Ah, that'll keep me going for at LEAST a week. :joker:

I take it all back, CC. You are WAY good at this! Although, I worry about your deification of Oprah. You seem to be building and building - step by step from being supermodels to leaving an historical legacy - and end with Oprah replacing Bob Greene with us. Interesting insight into your value system. ;)

And, actually, all kidding aside, I fully intend on having a real and long-lasting impact on the obesity epidemic after I've concluded the weight loss part of my journey. After reading this article (link below), I was just thinking about the nonprofit organization I am going to establish. http://health.msn.com/reports/obesity/articlepage.aspx?cp-documentid=100168553&ocid=B005MSN03A03002

CLCSC145
09-03-2007, 10:46 PM
Argh, Laurie! Sobering article... Getting to 100% of the population being overweight seems crazy (especially considering I live in the land of real, live Barbie dolls), but it has exploded so quickly that 80+% doesn't seem out of the realm of possibility. Scary.

On a lighter note, the Oprah thing was just the last thing popped into my head. :D In fact, it drives me a little crazy that so many people seem to worship in the church of Oprah! Like it or not, though, I guess she is a cultural phenomenon...