A post by Rhonda on another thread got me thinking about what food actually is to me. Now, of course, I'm working on making it fuel. But what WAS it to me that made me so fat?
For me, entertainment. I LOVE to cook. I'm an excellent cook. I love trying new things and feeding people. I spend HOURS reading cookbooks, magazines, websites, or watching the Food channel on television. I love for people to appreciate how good something I made is. One of my favorite things is to create a fabulous meal and then sit and enjoy it with others.
I've now had to switch that. It's become a REAL challenge. I'm making healthy foods, now, and you have to get really creative to make some of it appeal to a child. Sometimes, my feelings get hurt because they don't like the grilled salmon, couscous, and salad that I made for dinner. They want the stuff they used to get. Who can blame them? It was great!
So, I'm curious, what was it about food that kept YOU going back for more? Entertainment, taste, comfort, habit, or something else that hasn't even occurred to me yet???
This made me think a little. I think that entertainment is a part of mine. I also found it difficult to resist sweets because I craved them all of the time, so maybe biological necessity because I wasn't feeding my body properly? I don't know if that's a good way to describe it, but I hope you know what I mean.
Mostly, though, bad food choices were about convenience. I ate at McDonald's when we were on the road because it was fast and cheap. I always ordered off the dollar menu for everyone, and that's not where the healthier choices are located. And the sad thing is that I never enjoyed those meals at all, as the taste was unpleasant and I felt really bloated after. But I had dealt with the hunger and could move on. At home, as an example, I ate a lot of scrambled eggs because it's a quick and cheap meal. It's sad to think how little enjoyment I got from the foods that I chose over my health.
I'm with you to a point with entertainment. I'm the girl who cooks. We have people over all the time and we go out to eat with friends. But I don't think that social eating is my problem. I'm still the girl who cooks, we still go out.
I think the problem was I didn't pay any attention to what my body was telling me. And it has been trying to tell me! Too much greasy food? Better be near a bathroom. Too much fast food? Upset stomach. Too much pizza & pasta? So thirsty I thought I would die.
And now - I listen. I haven't had a "stomach" problem for six months. And it wasn't the grease or the fast food or the pasta. It was the quantity. I didn't eat a reasonable portion of anything. Actually, I used to laugh at the package that said two cookies was a serving. Who eats two cookies? Heck, I do now. Or even (my apologies to Nabisco) ONE COOKIE!
I have become a big eater of half. I split meals with my husband all the time. I throw half of a sandwich away before I take a bite of the half I'm going to eat. It took me a while to see that, for me, throwing food away was better than eating it, but I do it all the time.
For me it was all about taste. Looking back I can't see where I'm an emotional or stress eater; I wish I was, it would give me something finite that I could work on. I just really love food. I could literally eat pizza and a bag of hershey's kisses everyday.
Unfortunately, there are going to be foods that I simply cannot have because I cannot control the portion size. It's just a matter of convincing myself that it's a good trade for better health and appearance.
Using food for comfort has always been a problem for me. But I also think that being raised to "clean your plate" didn't help either. It didn't matter how much you took, you better eat it all.
That's where I had the problem. Portion control? Nonexistent to me. If I liked the taste (which is most of the time), then fill up your plate!! Seconds were never a no-no to me either.
Yeah, that "clean your plate" thing is awful, isn't it? And the whole idea that if one is good, ten is better? But it's a hard thing to change. I've said it before somewhere on this forum, but one of the best things someone told me is that the first two bites of anything is the best. After that it's just more of the same. I'm trying really hard to keep that at the front of my mind. Two bites of anything never made anyone fat. It's all that repetition that gets ya.
Emotional anyone? That was definitely me although for a long time I wouldn't admit it to myself. When the idea came up I totally dismissed it. But I've been using food when I was lonely since I was fairly young (I used to go for a "walk" every night after supper when we first moved across the country & buy junk at the corner store, eat it & dispose of the evidence before I got home).
Now - I don't have those issues so much as the habit. I find I need to really focus on not doing those behaviours just be default.
Agh, so food has been so many things to me... As my mom always said, it's terrible when food is both your consolation and your reward.
I ate for comfort, to celebrate, to check out for awhile, to not miss out, because everyone else was, out of boredom, because I was lonely, because the clock said it was time, for social interaction, because I was already fat so I might as well enjoy something...
Food has been one of my best friends. Sometimes it wasn't the food I was craving so much as the feeling of fullness-- and I rarely felt full. I am a recovering food junkie. I've thought about it all the time since I was about 7.
I have a whole mess of holes to fill with something other than food! But I am working on it and I know I can change.
Humm I would have to say comfort for one. My mom passed away when I was 4, and my sister got married 1 year after she died. So I was left with my dad and 3 brothers. I think I ate a lot of the time to comfort the loneliness. Also, my family's get togethers are always centered around food. And when we would celebrate it was food.
I am trying to use food now, as a way to help my body. Its not always easy, but I'm trying! Good post! It makes you really think about why you eat! Thanks!
For me, food has always been about love, friends, family, entertaining, showing off.
But, as this journey continues, this has not changed at all. Nor, do I want it to. In fact, it's become MORE about the food. Where does it come from? What is it made from? How is it made?
In addition to all the things food was to me at the beginning of this journey, it's become about nutrition, wholesomeness, local, fresh and taking the time to really, really taste it, savor it and admire it.
I've become a slow food foodie. I'd rather develop my relationship with food into something more than try to change it into something I don't think it ever could be.
Food is my comfort, my entertainment, my drug of choice. I can't stop it when I know I should, when I am so sick and fed up with it, I can't stop it. It was my mother and my friend when I didn't have one/any. It is the worst relationship I've ever been in. If I give it up completely, I would die, literally.
How sad?
As for eating everything on your plate...my son was eating his hamburger today. Said he wanted to put it in the fridge for later (I know it will go out with the other leftovers on trash day). I alsmost told him no, that he needed to finish it ALL. Then I stopped myself and told him if he is full then that is ok. I don't want him to lost the power of feeling full and stoping.
For me it was more about boredem, I eat when I am angry sad ect.. Plus being a SAHM I began cooking lots of things, cakes, reeses pieces bars, ect.. so the calories just came on. Healthy eating is easy for me, for the most part, as long as I don't have the junk in the house.
cheryl