I have a gym membership since last year September and I've been... twice.
I just don't know WHAT my problem is, but every time I say I'm going to go I just absolutely panic about it! I have this pretty much with everything I do really, not just the gym, but some things are easier to overcome (like going to work, going to the grocery store, going to meet a friend). I'm sitting here now, on 3FC, rather than locating my shoes and going to the gym like I told my boyfriend I was doing a couple of hours ago.
I want to go. I know if I just show up it will be OK. But I'm sitting here in a puddle of tears just thinking about going! What the heck is wrong with me and HOW can I just DO THIS???
I do exercise at home and I do bicycle to the train station (and back) most days, but it's not enough. I'm maintaining at 95KG and I want the number to go DOWN. So it's a catch 22. I don't want to weigh this much, yet I can't get my patootie to do extra exercise at the gym! My boyfriend says "don't go if it upsets you", but I'm upset that I weigh 95KG!!!
I like I just can't win here
any help, words of advise? if you had this problem, HOW did you get over it???
Hey there...well, I don't have this problem as far as going to the gym, but my anxiety definitely rules my world in other situations. Of course, in the beginning I would never go alone, but once I realized how much money I was wasting I just got up and went. Once I realized nobody was looking at me funny or cared even the slightest bit about who I was, everything was easier. I even find myself talking to strangers now and then about workouts while I'm there. Even if you could to take someone with you a few times at first to get used to it (most gyms offer guest passes for a day or a week, you just have to pay a fee). I have severe anxiety issues over work and a lot of social situations. It keeps me unemployed and staying at home a lot more than I'd like, so I understand. Feel free to PM me if you'd like to talk more about it. Hope this helps a little.
My boyfriend told me he would go with me, because a couple of weeks ago I had the same exact breakdown and he said "what can I do to help you?" I said "please, go with me!" He said he would, he said he even needs to work on his body a bit... but... we still haven't gone.
We've got the kids here now, so today is impossible for him to go with me. Maybe I should just forget about the gym right now and go out on my bike.
Otherwise, I don't have anyone at all near me that could go with me. I always do better when there is someone else there with me.
I understand what you are saying - I actually was unemployed for much longer than I wanted to be after I lost a job because I just couldn't leave the house
Also, you might want to look up some websites where you can find workout buddies in your area. I'm on one called exercisefriends.com I don't know if there are any people in your neck of the woods on there, but it's worth a try. I've located a few people who are near me and would like a workout partner. There are probably others out there, you just have to google it I guess. It's worth a shot.
Thanks, Once ~ I will look into it, but I'm not sure that exists in this country. It's worth looking into though
as it happens, I'm NOT going to the gym. I can't find my gym shoes. they are the only ones that haven't been worn outdoors. I will go on my elliptical tonight after the kids go back to their mom's.
Renee, if you hate the gym, you don't have to go to the gym--there are plenty of other ways for you to exercise. Why torture yourself?
Are you being treated for the generalized anxiety/agoraphobia? It sounds to me as though you should be seeing a psychologist or psychiatrist. I hope you're getting some help!
I joined the YMCA which is more for families and I see all shapes and sizes there, it's less intimidating for me. Is there one in your area? Or do you have exercise dvd's? On those days when you don't feel like going to the gym you can pop one of those in and exercise at home, I'm a privacy hound and I've prefered working out at home and I still don't go to the gym that often. If you like weights it's Kathy Smith or Cathe, or a lot of people like the Firm dvd's. Just get a pair of hand weights. The book Body Sculpting for Women also has a good program where you don't need the gym, in fact the authors say working out is best with dumbells. It's when you get in really good shape that the gym comes in handy for exercises you can't do at home. But if you are starting out you don't need a gym membership anyways. I agree if you don't like the gym, don't go. Find things you enjoy for cardio - hiking, biking, walking, etc and throw in some weight training at home.
Baffled - I do see a therapist and we are working on this I don't hate the gym at all, it's more that I hate leaving the house and going to the gym. Once I'm there, I'm fine (I think, I've only been twice and it was fine). That's why I don't understand why I get so upset.
Horsey, my biggest problem with working out at home is pure laziness. I have an elliptical and I have started using it more, but it's inconsistent. I do cycle almost every (work)day, but I just feel like it's not enough. There is no YMCA here in the Netherlands. The gym I have a membership at is a pretty mixed gym, the people there are intimidating, nor is it a meat market. The feelings I have are just purely getting from point a to point b.
I felt the same way about my gym when I first joined. In fact, it took me something like two years to work up the nerve to join, much less start going a regular basis. I got over it by signing up for personal training. As a general rule, I'm very conscientious about keeping appointments (especially if I lose money if I blow them off), so having an appointment with a trainer worked miracles in terms of getting me into the gym. For a long time, all I did were the training appointments but eventually I got comfortable enough to start going in on my own. If this is at all an option for you, I highly recommend it. Some gyms offer personal training in small groups to make it more affordable. Or, if you can't do the personal training, maybe explore some of the classes your gym offers. Having a specific time and reason to be there might help you get to the gym.
I also have to say, though, that my own experience has been that losing weight is all diet. The exercise has been great in terms of making me healthier and toned, but whether or not I lose weight depends entirely on my diet. In fact, I'm trying to lose just five more pounds and to do so, I recently had to cut back on exercise so that I could reduce the calories I eat further. So I'm not sure going to the gym is really going to be enough to move you off your plateau if you aren't also focusing pretty closely on your diet. When I was exercising without limiting my calories, I did not lose any weight.
Last edited by BlueToBlue; 06-25-2007 at 03:14 AM.
Renee, Aren't you the one with the crazy-long commute? Riding your bike to the station, taking a long train ride, etc? Perhaps you could stop at the gym on the way home from work (or in the morning before work) since you'll already NOT be in your house.
Or you could try really committing to using your elliptical at home. Make an appointment for yourself and your elliptical before or after work and just force yourself to do it.
Unlike Barbara, I tend to think that exercise is really crucial to weight loss. It just burns so many darn calories Of course, you have to NOT increase your eating to compensate for the exercise and you need to be strict with your food plan, but as long as you're good about food, I don't see why adding more cardio wouldn't help you to budge from your plateau. Perhaps you could try adding some strength training as well--some lunges, squats and some stuff with a few dumbbells.
How about the dvd's that are QUICK, like the 10 minunte dvd's? Just do 10 minutes here and there and it'll add up... Then walk or do something you enjoy. Heck if you are in the Netherlands you can do plenty of walking just around your beautiful town I'm guessing. Read the book French Women Don't Get Fat, those girls just walk on a daily basisi doing what they do. But they pick up dumbells too as they get older. There's a few books Smart Women do Dumbells and another I can't t hink of the name where you just do 10-20 minutes a day of lifting. Perhaps you are making this too complicated thinking you need a gym. It seems like the best motivator is a food/exercise journal for me. I'm lazy too. I "say" I'll work out, go to the gym etc. but I find that writing notes of exercises every day keeps me accountable. Our US fitness guru Denise A. says the same thing, if you are off course, start a journal. I've read articles about some famous skinny women in the US like Faith Hill and she says she hates exercise, just forces herself to get on the treadmill or whatever. It does seem like about half way through, as she says, it's not that bad. I think you have to exercise to lose too, otherwise you lose and if you were quite heavy your shape won't be "right." You need some muscle. I did the diet to death thing and wound up skinny fat before. I've found some "exercises" to do with my little boy too, if you have kids, exercise is a great bonding time. My boy is three, so we head out with the stroller or go to parks. While he's playing I just walk circles around him and do some sprints. I've done this at the mall too and I get in 1/2 hour of walking this way here and there. How old are your kids?
I didn't mention the mini stair steppers, you can buy one and just step in the evenings while watching tv. They take up little space. I'm sure there are better cardio machines but for over a decade I've always gone back to a mini stair stepper in the evenings because it's so easy. All the latest articles suggest that exercising is better without tv but heck it's something and it's cardio, thus it counts.
I'm glad I stumbled on this thread. I had the same issues about getting to the gym. It is still my biggest hurdle. Like you, once I'm there I'm fine, but it takes a bit to get my butt out the door.
In my case, I have been battling quite a bit. I had heart surgery (replaced 2 valves) and then I was put on a course of steroids which ballooned me up 55lbs. Needless to say I was and at times, continue to be very depressed. I am taking meds for the depression, but it seems like I'm in a vicious circle at times. I am depressed due to the weight gain. I have anxiety over going to the gym because I am overweight now.
I did exactly what BluetoBlue said-I joined a gym and signed up for the personal training sessions. When I know I have to show up for my workout, I manage to get out (still a struggle). The alternative is losing my $ and a very disappointed trainer-and even at 41, I still hate feeling like I am disappointing someone (or worse yet, wasting their time and efforts).
Try and get your boyfriend to go with you. Go buy a new pair of sneakers, grab your man and get to the gym. There is nothing like starting NOW. I know its tough...my husband has to be my cheerleader most days. Just know that you are not alone.
How about if you are overweight then you are "tired?" I gained over 80 lbs with my boy when I was pregnant. Lost most and then regained a lot. After I had my boy I sat around just exhausted all the time, I didn't want to move. As my mom said, just think about carrying around a 40 lb dumbell in each hand? Of course I was tired that overweight. So the good news is as you lose weight you'll have more energy, you'll feel better about yourself, you'll like yourself more, the depression will go away... it seems that it's the inital part of weight loss that's hard and I'm quite certain a lot of it's due to a lack of energy. So get a journal, plot out your exercise - even if it's at home the days you don't want to go to the gym, even if it's running around your kids, be creative but make yourself do it.
Severe Gym Phobia
