General chatter - Walk a day in my shoes




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bethmart
06-21-2007, 12:58 AM
If you could pick someone to walk a day in your shoes who would it be any why?


I would like my bf and his mother to walk a day in my shoes. To see what its like to live life with depression and not have energy to take care of yourself.

I would like my bf to be me for one day during my worse depression so I could come home and complain that the house isnt clean and what did you did sit home all day......


I would like his mom to know how depression feels. That life isnt all sunshine and rainbows. I swear she poos that out. (sunshine and rainbows) Shes still a Mrs Cleaver type of person. Her husband doesnt know how to cook clean or anythiing because she does it ALL.

She always calls me and tells me things I should be doing with my daughter. I guess she thinks I dont do enough with her.

I take her to the pool atleast twice a week and we can have fun staying home. She thinks I should be taking her somewhere everyday.

Last week we went to the pool twice the beach once and I took her fishing another day. We do plenty of things.


harrypotterybarn
06-21-2007, 01:37 AM
Good question! I think I'd like everyone who ever said "you work out of your house? That is so cool!" to spend a day here...or maybe a few months...so they could see just how lonely you can get when you're on your own all day long. It's one thing to joke about having board meetings with the dogs, but it's another thing when you find yourself actually doing it!

lizziness
06-21-2007, 01:53 AM
My boss - she could see what this job is actually like and realize the many many ways she makes it harder.

My parents so they know what it's like to have nobody.

My husband so he knows what it's like to be treated like a maid.


Casandra
06-21-2007, 05:07 AM
I can completely sympathize! I am going through the same type of situation myself! Well, I have been going through this situation for over a year now.

My hubby has never applied for a job, he didnt even write his own resume/CV. His mother did. His mother packed his lunch everyday for work until he was 22 (and now I'm doing it!) And my hubby, just gets offered jobs. He doesnt have to go looking at all!

I have spent over a year applying for jobs, and I've worked a full month out of the last 12 months! Depressing x 1,000,000.

My Mother In Law is somewhat Mrs Cleaver as well. She's an Office Manager, a Bookkeeper, and she does all the cooking and cleaning! My hubby's father has been out of work for almost 30 years now. Claiming the instant he goes back to work, he'll have a seizure.

It makes me feel so inferior sometimes, which depresses me even more :( If my hubs and my mother in law could walk a day in my shoes, witness the amount of sheer rejection I see everyday...they might understand a bit better.

bargoo
06-21-2007, 11:55 AM
bethmart, why are you letting this woman get to you? She is not a relative, only an acquaintance who happens to be your boyfriends mother.
Looks to me like your are doing a lot with your daughter and it is your business what you and your daughter do. If it were me next time she calls
I would say "I am right in the middle of something, can't talk now, bye"



'

sfj
06-21-2007, 12:04 PM
My fiancÚ so he can see how stressing it really is to do all the final planning for our wedding in 2 weeks.

alinnell
06-21-2007, 12:17 PM
I can't think of anyone who needs to see things from my perspective (except perhaps my kids). There are a few people whose shoes I would like to walk in for a day--so I can experience some of what they go through. It would be an eye opener.

NightengaleShane
06-21-2007, 03:15 PM
You know what?

I'm at the point in my life where I don't need to make anyone walk in my shoes. I used to think I was perpetually misunderstood, but I no longer feel that way. My life is rather bleak right now, anyway - I've lived through much more exciting times. Despite saying that it gets boring (same stuff, new day), it's not particularily difficult - and if it is, I no longer find it to be, because I've learned to stand on my own two feet and put up a good fight with any obstacles I may encounter.

I'd love to walk in the shoes of someone rich, famous, and adored...
but if that happened, I might be perpetually depressed at the prospect of my ordinary life. ;)

WinterStarzz
06-21-2007, 08:35 PM
Any girl who is 110 lbs and says, while wearing her string bikini on the beach, "I feel so fat in this!" UGH!!! I'd like her to gain 200 pounds and realize what "fat" is like.

FrouFrou
06-22-2007, 12:46 PM
My in-laws...so they could see me for the person I am rather than the person they think I am.

My family (any or all)...so they could see that I have struggles just like they do.

Lafayette
06-22-2007, 03:12 PM
I just received pictures in the mail from a wedding I stood up in three years ago when I was a fit, healthy 135 pounds and, after thinking, "Gee, I need to get back to that place!" I just felt angry at about all the people I let make me feel bad about my accomplishment. The snotty "you're too thin" comments, the "I'd be skinny, too, if I had an eating disorder" comments, the dirty looks from overweight people when I'd have dessert... I actually found some of my relationships improved when I gained the weight back and quit going to the gym.

Right then, I decided to quit explaining myself and stop looking outside myself as my main source of validation. I'm carrying that picture with me everywhere as a reminder that I can lose the weight and I can limit, if not control, the people in my life. In fact, I'm just not talking to the people who belittled me anymore, especially since they're sabotaging my current weight loss efforts. Whether it's fat or skinny, they can kiss my...!!!

I hope you find a way to remember that you are important and worthwhile because YOU say so, not because your bf and his mommy feel so bad about themselves that they have to belittle you to feel better. Sweetie, send your daughter into another room and give 'em what for!

bethmart
06-22-2007, 03:54 PM
Any girl who is 110 lbs and says, while wearing her string bikini on the beach, "I feel so fat in this!" UGH!!! I'd like her to gain 200 pounds and realize what "fat" is like.

I love that one lol

TeresaR
06-22-2007, 04:19 PM
I think I'd have my dad walk in my shoes for about a week. Let him esperience my depression issues. Or have him have walked in my shoes when I was a teenager and my grndpa died and have him hear the comments he made to me about his hating to go to the hospital to support give my mom moral support and making me go in his place.

bethmart
06-23-2007, 12:51 AM
I wish my dad could walk a day in my shoes too. To understand how much he has and sill does hurt me.

Its a long story but basically he was never really ever in my life. Even when I lived with him for two years.

Alot of stuff happened in the past and we had a falling out. When my daughter was born he never called sent a card or nothing. When I call him he doesnt really sound like he wants to talk. My other sister is like the favorite child, He calls writes her and all that but for some reason the rest of us kids gets nothing.

I just wish we could have a normal relationship but I feel so weird around him like hes a stranger. Its weird..............