Well I have been on my diet about a month now. The first 2 weeks went great.
But then I started slipping up..eating fast food or at a restaraunt for a meal just because I thought I could if I had done well the whole day with my calories. I love beef and steak especially, an have probably eaten it 4 times the past 2 weeks. And I always can't resist french fries. I just crave steak and potatoes.
I am so determined to make this work, but I don't really have alot of support on the home front. Fiancee thinks I am absolutely gorgeous and just doesn't understand why I want to do this for MYSELF. Even though I keep asking him to pleeeeease not take me to eat out, he keeps offering because he knows I won't say no to a good meal. I try to bargain with myself that I will only eat half of the portion of food, but I always end up ravenously eating it all like a woman possessed, and feeling bloated and fat afterwards. And then, once I think i have screwed up entirely, I will just keep eating and grazing on chocolate (will go out and BUY it since I know I can't keep it in the house). Evenings are usually ALWAYS My downfall. I will do great ALLL day..then at night..the binging will start.
How can I get this under control? I keep giving into myself and these insane cravings for BAD foods. Even though I have healthy things at home I can eat, once Fiancee asks me to go out and eat I can't say no..
I don't want to be fat. I hate the fact that I KNOW fast food and steak and french fries and chocolate, etc are BAD FOR ME, BUT I EAT THEM ANYWAY. Why can't I get it through my stupid head???
Anyway, I come here and read so many of your stories and can totally relate so I thought I would comeout of the closet and admit I have a huge problem with binging and overeating. Thanks for listening.
It's wonderful that your Fiancee loves you exactly the way you are (I'm jealous, my husband doesn't feel the same way!!) -- but keep plugging along and try to let him know that you know he loves you and you appreciate that, but you are not comfortable the weight you are currently. Point out you want to be healthier, happier and comfortable in your body. Eventually you will get your point across, he will probably never understand how you feel, but he should respect your wishes. If you "must" go out to eat, ask him to share his fries, etc. so you aren't tempted to overeat them. I also do horrible at night, after everyone is in bed, but I'm working on it, staying busy, out of the kitchen. Good luck to you.
Thank you so much I do keep trying to talk to him and let him know that it's great he thinks I am fine the way I am, but I just want to be healthier. Maybe he'll get it sooner or later LOL.
There are lots of "fast food" better choices you could make, and it sounds to me it's more about you learning to make good choices in the face of temptation. Going out to eat alot is a special treat, in that you don't have to cook / clean, and it's good quality time with your fiancee. I don't know which plan you are following, but with counting calories there are ALOT of restaurants that have nutrition info online. I think it's a matter of trying to make good choices, and maybe even getting a list of certain restaurants you frequent, because you know you can make good choices there.
We eat out quite a bit, and I've found that if I eat good all day, I can fit into my calorie goals a quarter pounder with cheese from McDonalds (no fries, though), and a fruit & yogurt parfait. Of course, their Asian grilled chicken salad is really good, too. I also will eat the egg mcmuffins for breakfast sometimes.
At Taco Bueno, you can get the chicken tortilla soup without the chips & cheese, and a taco, and diet lemonade.
Chicken fajitas aren't terrible if you eat just two of them.
If you're a drinker, switch to wine.
Chili's has their nutrition info on their site. And they have a lite menu, too. The salmon is delicious.
I think it's just a matter of maybe taking a Sunday afternoon, making a list of the restaurants near you & the things you can eat there & still stay on track.
This is definitely hard, because sometimes if you remove the taboo on these "bad" foods you won't want them as much. I know when I decide things are off limits then it's all I'm going to think about, like if I decide I won't eat fried food anymore than the first time I "cheat" and have it I will just go crazy and devour it because I feel like it's my last chance to eat it. If I know it is a special treat and I will have it again sometime, it's easier to eat a reasonable amount. It's hard though, because sometimes if there are specific foods that you know will lead you to binge it's better just not to get started on them!
Definitely forgive yourself and move on. If you stray from your plan, know that everyone makes mistakes and it's okay, and once you adopt healthy habits they will stick and you will even enjoy foods you might not have liked so much in the past. My biggest problem used to be if I binged then I would feel so horrible about myself and get in the I blew it might as well keep going mindset and then I would binge for days. Now I just put it behind me and get back on plan.
Keep posting here it's such a great group, and you'll find lots of support and motivatoin. Good luck
Thank you guys! My problem is making healthy choices when I eat out. It would be so easy just to get a salad or grilled chicken or something..but if I am eating out it seems I am determined to eat whatever I want, no sacrifices. And though some days eating out doesn't push me over my calories, I still know there are things that would be so much better for me. I feel like I will never lose weight if I keep slipping in a double cheeseburger and fries here and there.
I talked to my fiancee about this AGAIN and I think he's starting to get it a little. He has agreed to only take me out to eat once a month for a treat. That way I can have something to look forward too, but not be allowed to go overboard eating out ALL the time like we do.
Hello sockmonkey70!
I know what you mean... its so hard to stay on track sometimes, especially when dating...
My bf and I have been together for 4 years, and he loves me just the way I am, and it took him a while to realize that *I* dont love me the way I am and now he is super supportive of my efforts...
He likes to take me out every now and then, but what he has been doing lately is he has been cooking me lean meals, and then setting up our dining room or the backyard like a romantic little restaurant so we dont lose any of the "magic"...
Awwwww what a sweet idea. Now I just have to teach him to cook LOL.
We have been together 4 years now too, and sometimes it seems like eating out is the only thing we go out and do together. I think maybe we could incorporate some of the money we used for eating out to go bowling or something that doesn't involve eating. We just get so busy we don't find time to plan out special activities so eating out is an easy option.
Well good job on "coming out of the closet" about binging. It really is a freeing experience.
I know what you mean about the internal struggle that can go on when you are asked out to eat. I would (and still sometimes do) have panic attacks about it because I didn't want to "binge" or eat something I was uncomfortable with and then perhaps purge.
And it can be soooo difficult to "just say no." But maybe upfront you can tell your financee that this is really important to you and that eating out can sometimes sabotage your good efforts for something that means so much to you. He really sounds like he loves you so I think that he will understand and perhaps let up on the invites out to eat so often.
You are off to a good start by admitting your weakness! Like it has been previously stated, there are lite menus @ some places, and one thing that has really helped me stay on the diet that I am on is that when I want something I have it or have a substitute, IN MODERATION. nothing in america is given in the proportions that where intended, and I have found that if I leave a quarter to a half of whatever I am eating on my plate, I still lose weight! And exersize has been my other saving grace for my "slip ups" I guess. Good Luck!
sockmonkey - When your fiance and you hang out, think of it this way. You want to enjoy being with him and having his company. That is #1 on your list. What you eat doesn't make you enjoy him more or less does it? So try to focus on that. If you go out to eat, enjoy being out of the house, not having to clean up, and spending time with him. Those are the things to focus on! Good luck
Formally admitting I have a problem.
I do keep trying to talk to him and let him know that it's great he thinks I am fine the way I am, but I just want to be healthier. Maybe he'll get it sooner or later LOL.
