Weight Loss Support - I dont want to go on another diet




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carolva77
04-17-2007, 09:49 AM
I hate the word, diet! It makes me feel so deprived, and leads me to binges!
I want to eat thealthy, not to feel deprived, sad, guilty after a binge, etc.
Does anyone understand what I mean? I have lost and regained the same 20-25 # a lot of times. I believe if I brain wash myself thinkinng that I am not on 'a diet' I can reach and mantain (the hardest thing) goal.
Any input will be appretiated:?:


Janie Canuck
04-17-2007, 10:09 AM
Been there... check the "what books have you read" thread - I posted a few books about losing weight while NOT dieting, you might find them helpful. I've sworn off diets too. The weight creeps down more slowly, but my goal now is to end the bingeing and yo-yo-ing first, lose weight second. Good luck!

carolva77
04-17-2007, 10:19 AM
Thanks!


Rock Chalk Chick
04-17-2007, 10:25 AM
Sounds like you're prime for a "non-dieting" approach - often called intuitive or mindful eating. The basic focus is to eat when you're hungry, eat what you're hungry for, and (most crucial) stop eating when you're satisfied/no longer hungry (i.e. NOT stuffed or full). It sometimes takes just as much thought and effort as a structured diet, but it takes away all the taboo foods and restrictions - you can eat anything you like, as long as you want it, enjoy it, and STOP when you no longer want it.

There are a dozen or more good books that outline this theory and offer ways to implement it. Some are more scientific, some are more "self-help"-like, some are very straightforward and simple. "The Overfed Head" is a quick read which gives a basic overview of the concepts, and I'd also recommend "The Rules of 'Normal' Eating" which is a more in-depth study of the reasons behind overeating and how to alter them. And, as I said, there are a number of others that are quite good - different voices speak better to each of us.

But, when it comes down to the basics, they all have the same message - Eat when hungry, stop when satisfied.

Bikini Dreader
04-17-2007, 10:33 AM
I know exactly how you feel. I've been on many diets - anorexia, bingeing, etc. I have recently spent time trying to get to the root of the issue - my mind. I have read a lot of books to figure this out, written many journal pages, etc. I realized that until I figured out why I was doing this, what I was getting out of it, I would never stop. I am no longer on a diet. I am trying to eat healthy because I have a goal of getting back to my normal weight (not an increased weight brought on by bingeing).

For me, I was getting a lot of things by my eating habits and it was not until I figured that out until I felt like I had a handle on the issue. Sure I slip up, but nobody is perfect and that is something I'm working on as well. Diets for me bring on the urge to binge so I have no restrictions, no cheat days, no forbidden foods. I have an overall goal of being healthy in body and mind so each food choice I make is weighed against that goal. I have found this generally works for me. This forum is a huge help as well. There are some great people on here who are supportive.

Good luck with your goals. Have you looked on the Chicks in Control forum? I didnt realize I was a compulsive/binge eater until I read through there.

Believe in yourself. You can do it and reach your goals.

nelie
04-17-2007, 10:33 AM
Honestly, I think there is a large majority here that don't view their eating habits as a diet but rather a lifestyle change. I've gone through a huge lifestyle change. I concentrate on eating whole foods and avoid too much added fat and added sugars. I don't count calories but once in a while I'll enter my foods into fitday to see how many calories I eat on an average day. I also try to get plenty of fiber.

I don't view my eating as a diet at all. A diet is temporary, this is for life.

rockinrobin
04-17-2007, 10:44 AM
It took me a looong time (umm 20 years) to realize that in order to take off the weight - permanently - that what ever plan I went on I would have to stick with - forever. A very long time indeed. Diets don't work because they have beginnings - and then of course - endings. We need something that we CONTINUE. No endings - just on and on and on. Once I finally got that through my head and ACCEPTED it fully and completely was when I was able to tackle weightloss. I switched from high quantity/low quality foods to healthy and highly nutritious foods in normal sized portions - yup, I'm in this forever. I have had great success so far eating low fat proteins and tons and tons of veggies and fiber. And I count calories. For me, I need to set limits, I can overeat even healthy foods.

nicolbw
04-17-2007, 11:11 AM
The word diet has two different meanings for me. On one hand it means an eating program like the word normally is used, and on the other hand it also means just the way I eat.

I've decided that "diets" aren't for me. I've never been able to stick to them.

I pick healthier foods when shopping. For example, low fat dairy, low fat or fat free salad dressing, etc. I've added in more vegetables. For my afternoon snack I've changed from eating crackers or something similar to eating cauliflower or carrots and dip. I don't pile on the dip. For dinners I limit my portion. I count calories and allow 500 calories for dinner.

I've found that counting calories is what helps keep me in control of my binges. I don't track my calories online. I keep a notepad with me and write down what I ate, how much, the calories, and have a column for the balance for the day. This works tons better for me than online tracking. I know how much I need to be around at certain times of the day. I also have a range that I like to stay in.

I've taken the dinners I used to make that my family likes and made them healthier and lower calorie. I make pancakes with the healthy bisquick instead of the regular. I make burgers out of ground turkey instead of beef. (Although a lean beef would work too.) If I bake I use Splenda instead of sugar. I use skim milk in my recipes instead of whole milk. I also take any snacks I buy and divide them up into 100 calorie portions and put them in individual snack bags. I then put them all in a box. This way I don't have to measure then each time I want to eat something and I limit myself on the things that are higher calorie.

Just do what you can towards eating healthier right now and make the changes you want to make. Later you can add more things. Take it slow. For me these changes are for the rest of my life and I only made them when I was ready to make that change. (I'm not willing to give up Diet Coke and probably won't be willing to for a long time, but that's ok.) Any changes you can make are well worth it if you make them for good.

LLV
04-17-2007, 11:19 AM
Diet is a 4-letter word, in my opinion.

Like nelie said, I'm not on a diet. I've simply changed my lifestyle. I will never go on a "diet" again.

And I agree with the above sentiments ;)

carolva77
04-17-2007, 11:22 AM
OMG thanks so much, I am so relieved there is people that actually understand where I am coming from... it is like a weight has been lifted from my shoulders.
i dont have any problem exercising, it is the binges that scare the **** out of me, and it is because I restrict "bad" foods.... I plan on not doing that anymore.

LLV
04-17-2007, 11:33 AM
OMG thanks so much, I am so relieved there is people that actually understand where I am coming from... it is like a weight has been lifted from my shoulders.

It's a HUGE one.

And you don't have to restrict everything. That's one thing I DO NOT believe in, deprivation. I'm in this for life. Do you think I'm going to go the rest of my life without pizza or chocolate chip cookies or the occasional piece or two of fried chicken?

No way!

I still eat those things. I just eat them in extreme moderation. I eat 90% healthy, 10% not so great. I still steer clear of loads of sugar and deep-fried foods. But yep, I grab the occasional egg roll or piece of fried fish from the Chinese buffet. That's my little "sinful" treat. I allow myself these things. I just eat healthy most of the time (veggies, whole grains, beans, lowfat and fat-free dairy, etc.) and then let myself have a little fun once in a while. As I said, we're in this for life and there's no reason why you should HAVE to give up the occasional treat. If I'm craving an ice cream cone, I have one. I just make sure it's counted in with my calories for the day :)

In fact, getting myself into this mentality - away from diets and away from depriving myself of the foods I love - is when I started to lose the weight.

And you're absolutely right, depriving yourself leads to binges. If you give yourself the occasional taste of a beloved food, you won't be so tempted to go eat the refrigerator, LOL.

And we all have the occasional meal where we think OMG I've totally blown it. No, you haven't. If you eat a little too much in one sitting, like if you go out with family or friends, then count it as an enjoyed experience and move on, getting back on track the next day. There's no point in beating yourself up or thinking of yourself as a failure. Because we're not failures. We're human.

carolva77
04-17-2007, 11:37 AM
Thanks so much for your kind words.
I have another question, why the lowfat, fatfree dairy.
Is fat really that bad?

Rock Chalk Chick
04-17-2007, 11:40 AM
I find it interesting and poignant that you've gotten so many helpful yet varied responses - it just drives home the point that you have to figure out what works for you. You know that a structured, restrictive "diet" isn't going to work for you - your frustration makes that clear. There are some people who thrive on being told exactly what to eat and do well under a "diet" (these are usually the "success" stories in any diet guide). There are a lot who chafe under such a strict restriction - you can lose for a time, but gain it back.

Everyone can give you ideas, but only you can find out if that will work for you.
Some find success with replacing unhealthy foods with lower-cal versions.
Some find they shift their eating to a whole-foods, unprocessed basis.
Some find an 80-20 method helps (80% "healthy" 20% "whatever).
Some find limiting portions to be the trick.
Some (including me) find that it works to "authorize" all foods as equal and eating only when hungry and ignoring any outside influence.

It's tricky - there is no "one size fits all" weight-loss method, which is the main drive that any given "diet" is never going to work for most people. It works for one, but that doesn't mean it works for anyone else.

Shop around, read some books/websites, find a way of eating that will work for you, longterm. Find an eating style that makes you feel good, is healthy, and helps you attain and maintain a healthy body and weight without a lot of struggle. It's hard. But it's worth it to know you can be off the "diet" yo-yo bandwagon for good.

carolva77
04-17-2007, 11:42 AM
Thank you so much, I have been beating myself for going "off" atkins, but ketosis gives me insomnia, not bashing anyone or anything, but I cant sleep, I dont have energy to run (which I luv to do)...and even though it works wonder I cant do it for life. I need apples and whole grains, and it takes so long to get there with atkins :( But LC works for a lot of people!

LisaMarie71
04-17-2007, 11:46 AM
The biggest revelation for me was that I don't have to cut ANY food out of my life. I can enjoy the foods I love -- I just can't eat enormous portions of them. And when you do it that way, it doesn't feel like a DIET -- it just feels like you're being reasonable. Normal, even. It's not normal to consume mass quantities of ANYthing, and that's why I ended up obese. I was addicted to it. Some people would say you need to quit cold-turkey, like with smoking, and eliminate those foods from your life, and that may be what works for some. But for me that feels like a DIET, and I wouldn't keep it up forever. Robin's right, it's the ending to the diet that will get you. If it's not something you can continue, it's just not going to work.

LLV
04-17-2007, 11:46 AM
Thanks so much for your kind words.
I have another question, why the lowfat, fatfree dairy.
Is fat really that bad?

Well, mostly because I'm a calorie snob. The lower in fat a food is, the fewer the calories, in most cases. That and I watch saturated fat VERY carefully.

Some people, however, prefer the fuller-fat versions of, say, milk and cheese because they think it tastes better. I'm so used to eating fat-free everything that it doesn't bother me. Although I drink 1% milk instead of skim. I just think it tastes better.

carolva77
04-17-2007, 11:48 AM
Thanks!! your words are gold to me, it is hard for my hubby to understand me... I have been on a diet forever!!! and I am tired, and heavier... I am going off my diet and into my healthy lifestyle (and running i love it) right now!

carolva77
04-17-2007, 11:49 AM
it looks for me is sugar...the evil, but the sugar from fruits and whole grains is what I miss the most... people cant leave in meat and vegetables alone

LLV
04-17-2007, 11:50 AM
Thanks!! your words are gold to me, it is hard for my hubby to understand me... I have been on a diet forever!!! and I am tired, and heavier... I am going off my diet and into my healthy lifestyle (and running i love it) right now!

I agree with Rock Chalk Chick, it's about finding your own balance. And yeah, it takes time. I went on 100,000 diets. I "dieted" my way to 220 pounds. Once I dropped the diets, started counting calories, got out of the "diet" mentality and started eating healthier, that's when the weight began to come off.

nelie
04-17-2007, 11:52 AM
I also believe on improvement and not perfection. I'm constantly trying to improve my eating habits.

When I first started, I cut down on the type of foods I ate but I didn't watch my portions. Then I found out as I progressed that I needed to watch my portions. Then I decided that I needed to incorporate more whole foods into my diet while cutting out certain high calorie dinners out.

My eating habits of today are different from my eating habits of a year ago and eating habits of the year before that and the year before yet. I'm really slowly trying to progress rather than to change everything at once. Most recently, I've decided to cut out most meat from my diet. It doesn't mean that I can't have meat if I want it but I'm not really wanting meat right now. The same thing with dairy, I decided to cut out most of it as well. If I craved a steak though, I'd get a steak although I'd make sure it was a small portion of one rather than a large one.

You will also find that your taste buds change when you improve your diet. I used to crave ice cream and chocolate all the time but now I only like an occassional ice cream and if I'm eating chocolate, it has to be good stuff and dark. I used to not eat a lot of veggies but now I eat lots and lots of veggies. I no longer want to eat gooey ooey sweets, I no longer want to eat fried foods, I no longer want to eat fatty foods. Of course there are certain things I like as special treats such as really good chocolate cake or really good cheesecake. Then again, it is about portion control when it comes to those occassional special treats.

One thing to remember is to not beat yourself up if you eat something you weren't planning to eat. Improvement not perfection :)

carolva77
04-17-2007, 11:56 AM
Thanks! I love to exercise, but the restrictions of Atkins (great woe btw) played in my head like a sentence

LLV
04-17-2007, 11:57 AM
I also believe on improvement and not perfection. I'm constantly trying to improve my eating habits.

When I first started, I cut down on the type of foods I ate but I didn't watch my portions. Then I found out as I progressed that I needed to watch my portions.

That's right. Because we can eat way more than we need without realizing it. I was doing the same thing. I was saying, "But I'm eating healthy, watching portions, cutting fat and sugar, blah blah blah, and I'm still not losing any weight!"

Well, healthy food has calories too and I was simply eating too much. Once I started logging my calories, I was shocked at how many I was eating per day when I ASSUMED I was eating healthy enough to lose weight. Yes, I was eating healthy. But I was still taking in more calories than my body needed.

LLV
04-17-2007, 11:58 AM
Thanks! I love to exercise, but the restrictions of Atkins (great woe btw) played in my head like a sentence

I'm not going to be an Atkins basher, but I don't believe in these diets. It's simply another means of restricting yourself and I don't believe in restricting certain food groups. I can't speak for everyone because I know some people, because of health reasons, need to watch their glycemic foods - but I've lost nearly 90 pounds and I still eat rice, pasta and potatoes.

~GASP~

Yes, it's true! Don't faint!

carolva77
04-17-2007, 12:04 PM
WOW LLV You are my hero.... My problem is as I said, I luv to run, but I was running on empty, carbs (the good ones) are for energy. I had none.
And it was getting really bad, because ketosis made me insomniac, so tired and I cant sleep. Atkins is great just not for me.

carolva77
04-17-2007, 12:06 PM
I'm not going to be an Atkins basher, but I don't believe in these diets. It's simply another means of restricting yourself and I don't believe in restricting certain food groups. I can't speak for everyone because I know some people, because of health reasons, need to watch their glycemic foods - but I've lost nearly 90 pounds and I still eat rice, pasta and potatoes.

~GASP~

Yes, it's true! Don't faint!

WHAT DO YOU DO FOR EXERCISE?

LisaMarie71
04-17-2007, 12:08 PM
I've lost nearly 90 pounds and I still eat rice, pasta and potatoes.

~GASP~

Yes, it's true! Don't faint!

:lol: Get this...I've lost 83 pounds and not only do I eat rice, pasta, and potatoes...I also eat bread! And I probably have high-fructose corn syrup every day and guess what? It doesn't trigger an enormous eating binge like everyone tells me it will!! I'm a miracle of science, my friends. A miracle. ;)

LLV
04-17-2007, 12:14 PM
WOW LLV You are my hero.... My problem is as I said, I luv to run, but I was running on empty, carbs (the good ones) are for energy. I had none.
And it was getting really bad, because ketosis made me insomniac, so tired and I cant sleep. Atkins is great just not for me.

I honestly don't believe it's good for ANYONE, but keep in mind that this is just my personal opinion. I just don't believe in restricting food groups. All that is is another form of deprivation.

WHAT DO YOU DO FOR EXERCISE?

I love Pilates. I don't work out hard. I don't lift weights or jog every day or bust my butt in a gym. I do Pilates exercises (I have a Pilates DVD) and housework.

LOL

:lol: Get this...I've lost 83 pounds and not only do I eat rice, pasta, and potatoes...I also eat bread! And I probably have high-fructose corn syrup every day and guess what? It doesn't trigger an enormous eating binge like everyone tells me it will!! I'm a miracle of science, my friends. A miracle. ;)

*FAINT*

LOL

This is terrible! We must be punished and thrown into the dungeon!

But yep, I eat bread too. Just about every day. Of course most of the bread I eat is whole grain, but I have the occasional plain white bun (another gasp moment) when I make a sandwich. Usually when I have my Boca burgers.

carolva77
04-17-2007, 12:17 PM
Ladies who are you and how did you do it? I have not had bread in months.... or years maybe.
Ketosis, I dont know. I know I cant sleep when I am in deep ketosis.
Besides that, people on atkins do eat a lot of veggies but fruits are very far away and bread, almost in maintenance and I cant keep going like that. I just want 2 -3 WASA crackers a day....

LLV
04-17-2007, 12:32 PM
Ladies who are you and how did you do it?

Well, for me, and many of us here, it was calorie-counting. If there's one thing I've learned in this little journey of mine, it's that carbs don't make you fat; excess calories make you fat.

Many of us here use fitday.com to log our food. You simply put in what you've eaten and how much and fitday keeps track of calories, fats, carbs, protein, nutrients, etc. You can also log your exercise to see how many calories you're burning.

Find an online calorie calculator. One that asks you to enter your weight, height, age, sex and activity level. It will tell you how many calories you need per day to MAINTAIN your current weight. To lose 1-2 pounds a week (you don't want to try and lose any faster than that) you simply subtract 500 calories from your total.

For example, say it tells you that you need 2200 calories a day to stay at the weight you are now. Subtract 500 from that. You get 1700 calories. That's the range you should stay at to lose. Then you use fitday to make sure you don't go over 1700. And you'll start losing weight.

It's not an exact science, these are only estimates. And it's not something that's going to happen overnight. It took me a little over 2 years to lose my weight. But then I had a lot to lose.

Calorie-counting doesn't work for everyone and everyone uses their own methods. But that's how you find what works for you, you try out different things. We didn't all come to these final conclusions overnight. It takes time. And like nelie said, it's forever changing :)

nelie
04-17-2007, 12:36 PM
I personally don't eat much bread or pasta mostly because it tends to have a lot of calories for small portions :) I also have insulin issues (hypoglycemia, PCOS) so I do tend to watch my carbs a bit but not too much. I found a nice bread yesterday from Trader Joe's that has 40 calories per slice, although it isn't too far off from my normal 50 calorie per slice bread.

I eat two pieces of fruit per day. I usually eat an apple during the day and an orange at night. I also recently bought a cereal so I could snack on during the day.

carolva77
04-17-2007, 12:45 PM
but then you choose your calories to be nutritios ones I guess.
I will try the calorie counting thing

browneyedgirl77
04-17-2007, 12:59 PM
Lisamarie71 that's the hardest I've laughed in awhile. Great post!!!

browneyedgirl77
04-17-2007, 01:00 PM
I wish I could eat whatever I wanted to I need to watch things carefully. SB definitely works best for me. I love veggies so it's not much of a stretch.

carolva77
04-17-2007, 01:04 PM
Well If you think about it, if you dont restrict anything, you dont want those things that much after all

JayEll
04-17-2007, 01:12 PM
Hey! Good thread!

When I started calorie counting, there were some foods I just couldn't let near me because my desire for them Knew No Bounds. But as you say, carolva77, after awhile you don't want them so much anymore and you can *occasionally* have them.

I sometimes use full-fat foods, but I watch the portions VERY carefully. It makes a big calorie difference whether you have 1 TBS of olive oil or 1.5 TBS. So I measure all those foods pretty precisely. I use full-fat cheddar cheese, for example, but 1% milk. I used to dislike 1% milk, but I got used to it and now it tastes "normal" to me.

Jay

carolva77
04-17-2007, 01:14 PM
I eat ff cheese, but I limit my intake, and it seems to fit my caloric needs. I am going to buy the low carb-fat free milk, which it is very good for me.
I dont have goals anymore . I just want to be healthier and 'legalize' all foods. If they are not forbidden and I know I can have them, in my mind I can have a little piece once on a while and I dont obsess over them

browneyedgirl77
04-17-2007, 01:22 PM
That's a good philosophy. I tried that and then I noticed that I had put on some weight bad habits kicked in and I stopped eating. Unfortunately, I think once you past 25 that doesn't work anymore and I put on a lot of weight. I gained back at least 45 lbs in 8 months. Some of it do to emotional eating and probably drinking. Something I usually don't do. In fact, a part of me is thinking that maybe I started losing weight again because I stopped drinking. I was thinking that I would eventually start adding more things back into my diet when I relearn self control.

Beach Patrol
04-17-2007, 02:38 PM
You know, the actual WORD..... "diet" ... doesn't mean "a way to eat so you can lose weight". The TRUE definition of "diet" is the food and drink habitually consumed by a person...

It's just that... people who have gone on "diets" always seem to associate the word "diet" with losing weight. So we look at the definition as a planned or prescribed selection of food and drink, especially one designed for weight loss


Ain't we all silly? :dizzy: :carrot: :hyper:

Personally, I don't care what we call it... I just know that I need to see LESS POUNDAGE on the scale, LESS INCHES on the measuring tape, and LESS worry about the whole thing! :D

carolva77
04-17-2007, 02:44 PM
for me is the fact to think something is forbidden,then I crave it... but if it is not... I would have a little piece and leave it alone.
That is why Atkins did not work for me, the restrictions were killing me, I never crave sweets but if I cant have them, I obsess over them

Beach Patrol
04-17-2007, 02:53 PM
I never crave sweets but if I cant have them, I obsess over them

Maybe you have a magnesium deficiency. I have a sweet tooth from ****, but once I got more magnesium in my diet, the sweet tooth hath been quelled! ;)

nicolbw
04-17-2007, 03:03 PM
I choose lower fat or fat free foods because of the calories. Some things I still eat full fat.

In my Nutrition class I've been learning alot. The book is called Personal Nutrition by Marie A Boyle and Sarah Long. It goes into depth about nutrients and what they do for us as well as how much we need of everything. I recommend it if you want to know more information about food and what it does for us. I only recommend it if you want to spend the money on a college textbook. :)

rockinrobin
04-17-2007, 03:05 PM
I find for me personally I have to stay away from bread, pasta and rice just as much as cake and ice cream. I am not satisfied with a measly 1/2 cup serving. I just don't have control over the stuff. So I don't make it. I have had a couple of times though. But as a rule (which can be broken - and will) I stay away. I really like VOLUME, hmmm perhaps that's why I got to be 287 lbs. Anyway, I am a calorie counter and I get the most food for my calorie allotment with veggies and lots of them. Which is what works for ME. I can eat 3 cups of cauliflower for 84 calories and am extremely satisfied.

carolva, I hear you loud and clear on the restriction bringing on cravings. It's the rebel in all of us. With calorie counting you are open to eating anything - once in a while. Which is how it should be, IMO.

MariaMaria
04-17-2007, 03:11 PM
Well If you think about it, if you dont restrict anything, you dont want those things that much after all

This is not what I found at all. Not restricting anything is why I got fat.

We all have to find our own way.

carolva77
04-17-2007, 03:14 PM
Oh I see... like me... let say I am "doing" Atkins. My set of mind is... I will never have X food again, so I start obsessiong and when I give up, I eat a lot of it...but If I can eat anything I have a piece and feel ok. Cause I know I can have another piece tomorrow. My mind works like that

LLV
04-17-2007, 04:06 PM
but then you choose your calories to be nutritios ones I guess.

For the most part, yes.

When I say I eat potatoes and rice, I just mean they're included in the things I eat, I don't eliminate anything. However, since potatoes and rice are fairly high in calories, I limit how much I eat. Basically what I try and do is balance everything. Like if I have a high-carb meal for lunch, I back off of them at dinner. Or if I know I'm having rice or potatoes or pasta for dinner, I have a big salad with some protein (usually shrimp or grilled chicken) for lunch, or I'll eat fish and vegetables. So that's pretty much what it's about for me is balancing everything. I don't avoid the rice and potatoes because they're high in carbs, I balance it all out that way to keep my calories down. Because, let's face it, if I ate nothing but pasta and potatoes all day, I wouldn't be able to squeeze a whole heck of a lot of food into the 1200 calories I eat. Although I've recently upped my calories to maintain. I've pretty much made my goal; I'm not focusing on the "130" number. My main goal was to stay within a range, between 130 and 135.

I only weigh myself about twice a month. As long as I stay under 135, I'm happy.

LLV
04-17-2007, 04:12 PM
Well If you think about it, if you dont restrict anything, you dont want those things that much after all

To a point, yes. But I guess it depends on the person. Some people (like Jay and Robin in this thread) know their "danger zones" (like they know if they bring a half gallon of ice cream into the house, they won't be happy with just 1/2 cup serving, they'll sit down and eat the whole thing) so it's important to know YOUR danger zones. If you don't trust yourself to not eat a whole bag of potato chips instead of being satisfied with a small handful, you're probably better off not buying them at all.

My danger food is donuts. I freaking LOVE donuts. And I know if I buy them and bring them into my house, I'll eat them until they're gone. So I just don't buy them.

But there are certain foods that if I DENY myself them completely, I'll crave them constantly. I always want what I know I'm not supposed to have. If it's not in my house, I'll go nuts thinking about it. But if I've got it available and I know it's there if and when I want it, the craving will sometimes go away.

For example, when I was pregnant, I had gestational diabetes. I wasn't "allowed" to eat candy or sweet treats. And because I wasn't allowed to eat them, I wanted them ALL THE TIME. But now that I no longer have gestational diabetes and I can eat those things again, I don't really want them anymore.

The human mind is a strange beast, LOL.

LLV
04-17-2007, 04:32 PM
You know, the actual WORD..... "diet" ... doesn't mean "a way to eat so you can lose weight". The TRUE definition of "diet" is the food and drink habitually consumed by a person...

Well, we're talking in terms of one of those 'faddy' type things, LOL.

Personally, I don't care what we call it... I just know that I need to see LESS POUNDAGE on the scale, LESS INCHES on the measuring tape, and LESS worry about the whole thing! :D

Amen!

It's so much easier on your emotional being not to obsess over the whole thing. And I'll admit, I used to be obsessive. Weighing myself every day (sometimes several times a day which is totally pointless) focusing only on the scale and not much else, focusing on those numbers. Those blasted numbers. This was more towards the beginning of my lifestyle change. Then I told myself, "honey, you gotta relax, you're going to drive yourself insane. This is a lifetime commitment and you don't want to be this way forever."

So I stopped weighing myself so much and started focusing on other things besides the stupid scale. Yes, I still weigh myself, about once or twice a month, just to make sure I'm not putting any weight back on. But that's all that scale is now, is an occasional tool to keep me accountable; not something I base my life on.

If we all go out to eat or get together for a holiday or end up at a BBQ, I eat and I enjoy myself without obsessing over the calories. But thankfully these things happen rarely. Then of course there's my Sunday dinner. Since the beginning of my weight loss journey, I have ONE MEAL a week where I eat what I want and as much as I want and then pick up the next day and move on. That one meal a week has kept me sane.

LisaMarie71
04-17-2007, 04:43 PM
I think maybe we need to distinguish between "restricting" and "eliminating." Obviously I "restrict" things like cheesecake, because if I didn't, there's no way I'd have lost all this weight no matter how many miles I ran. But I don't "eliminate" anything, because I don't find it realistic and I think there's nothing wrong with occasionally enjoying food that isn't the healthiest thing in the world. Don't get me wrong, I enjoy healthy food too -- I love most fruits and vegetables and much of my diet comes from them. We always seem to believe it has to be all or nothing, though -- like you have to go COMPLETELY to healthy foods and leave all the "bad" foods behind forever. Some of us are just saying that we've been able to find a different way. Clearly we have to restrict those foods, as we have to restrict ALL foods when counting calories. And when you count calories, you want more bang for your caloric buck so you go for the high-volume low-calorie stuff Robin was talking about in her post. If you find that you can't control yourself around the "bad" foods, then yes, elimination may be necessary. If you're committed, though, you may find that you can show more restraint than you ever thought you could.

But to answer your question, carol, that's how I've done it so far: counting calories (though I use Weight Watchers points because it's just what I'm used to and I like the fact that it takes fat and fiber into consideration for me). I also did it through exercise -- tons of cardio, starting with walking, progressing to MORE walking and cardio machines, and now mostly running.

carolva77
04-17-2007, 04:50 PM
I love to exercise!!! If it were for me I would do it 2 hours every day but my hormons got crazy when I did that.
But as I said before ... doing Atkins I had no stamina to do it, because ketosis kept me from sleeping and no sleeping made me tired.
Now, I feel like adding GOOD carbs, such as whole grains and fruit, even nuts, would be better for me....

nelie
04-17-2007, 05:08 PM
You know, the actual WORD..... "diet" ... doesn't mean "a way to eat so you can lose weight". The TRUE definition of "diet" is the food and drink habitually consumed by a person...

It's just that... people who have gone on "diets" always seem to associate the word "diet" with losing weight. So we look at the definition as a planned or prescribed selection of food and drink, especially one designed for weight loss


I think we all would agree that "Diet" has become an english idiom. I will refer to my diet meaning basically what I eat and drink but it does confuse people sometimes. Of course, to "go on a diet" does mean something entirely different as if there is a point in which you will revert back to eating whatever you ate before.

I also agree to the point about the difference between eliminating foods and restricting them. The only foods I've really eliminated from my diet are fried foods. I have gall bladder issues and I rather not endure the pain :) There are foods I restrict (eat once a week) and then there are foods that I heavily restrict (eat once a month). Mostly because there are foods that are hard to fit into my daily lives and also may induce cravings. So I may buy an ice cream cup once in a while but I'm certainly not buying ice cream to have at home whenever I feel like it.

LLV
04-17-2007, 06:22 PM
I think maybe we need to distinguish between "restricting" and "eliminating." Obviously I "restrict" things like cheesecake, because if I didn't, there's no way I'd have lost all this weight no matter how many miles I ran. But I don't "eliminate" anything, because I don't find it realistic and I think there's nothing wrong with occasionally enjoying food that isn't the healthiest thing in the world.

Ahh, yes, very good point and observation :)

Because, like most of you, I "restrict" certain foods but I don't "eliminate" anything.

carolva77
04-17-2007, 08:29 PM
I restrict a lot of foods, but I dont think I can do that forever, but it is unrealistic to believe that eating junk food every day will make you fit and healthy

misty dawn
04-17-2007, 08:36 PM
hi i am new at this i just need a friend to give me a hand every now and then

LLV
04-17-2007, 08:37 PM
I restrict a lot of foods, but I dont think I can do that forever, but it is unrealistic to believe that eating junk food every day will make you fit and healthy

Well, no, none of us believe that. Or at least I don't. I don't eat junk every day. I'll reiterate, I eat it OCCASIONALLY. I'm not giving up the foods I love and I haven't. Again, I just eat them in extreme moderation.

As I've always said, moderation is the key. And YOU are the moderator.

LLV
04-17-2007, 08:38 PM
hi i am new at this i just need a friend to give me a hand every now and then

Welcome to 3FC :)

Lots of good people here and lots of good information.

rockinrobin
04-17-2007, 08:53 PM
In the very, very beginning of my journey I simply had to say hands off of ALL junk. Or should I say teeth off. Not only junk but pasta, rice, bread and all the carby stuff as well. I was not good at setting limits. I felt to start off I needed to set some STRICT rules. I had in my head that EVENTUALLY I would go by the way of everything in moderation. And like LLV said - EXTREME moderation at that. This is what worked for me. BUT, I didn't look at it as DEPRIVING myself. I was EXCITED that for the first time I was on my way to a healthier, fitter and more active life. I didn't (and still don't) look at it as what I am losing out on. I look at is as what I am GAINING - that fitter, healthier and happier ME, with much more joy and waaay less worries. Every bite of that stuff that doesn't go down my throat is a victory for me. And I DON'T feel deprived - not even a little bit. The rewards outweigh the sacrifices - by a WHOLE LOT in fact.

I simply want to add that I love, just love the fact how well LLV and Lisamarie know me. That's all.

redlight
04-17-2007, 09:25 PM
I think maybe we need to distinguish between "restricting" and "eliminating." Obviously I "restrict" things like cheesecake, because if I didn't, there's no way I'd have lost all this weight no matter how many miles I ran. But I don't "eliminate" anything, because I don't find it realistic and I think there's nothing wrong with occasionally enjoying food that isn't the healthiest thing in the world. Don't get me wrong, I enjoy healthy food too -- I love most fruits and vegetables and much of my diet comes from them. We always seem to believe it has to be all or nothing, though -- like you have to go COMPLETELY to healthy foods and leave all the "bad" foods behind forever. Some of us are just saying that we've been able to find a different way. Clearly we have to restrict those foods, as we have to restrict ALL foods when counting calories. And when you count calories, you want more bang for your caloric buck so you go for the high-volume low-calorie stuff Robin was talking about in her post. If you find that you can't control yourself around the "bad" foods, then yes, elimination may be necessary. If you're committed, though, you may find that you can show more restraint than you ever thought you could.



Good point Lisa!

nelie
04-17-2007, 09:53 PM
I restrict a lot of foods, but I dont think I can do that forever, but it is unrealistic to believe that eating junk food every day will make you fit and healthy

It does really depend on how much your tastes change. Things that I thought used to taste good, now taste too sweet, taste too greasy or taste too chemically so I don't eat them. They aren't what I want to eat though. If there is something that you really want to eat, then if you plan for it, I see no reason for it not to be part of your eating plan.

For me, there are certain things that I used to eat that I have no problem if I never eat again. It is mostly because my tastes have changed and so have my interests.

carolva77
04-17-2007, 10:32 PM
honestly is like this : if I know I can have a little piede let say chocolate (even the sf one) I can live with a piece every now and and then, if i think i cant i crave it

JayEll
04-17-2007, 11:34 PM
Hey misty dawn, :welcome:

We'll be glad to give you a hand!

I know what you mean, carolva77. Nothing like "no" to make one want to go for it. The hard part is learning how to say no to yourself, not because it is punishment but because it is a choice and it is the best choice at the time.

And I try to phrase it to myself as "not today" because "never" is too long and too impossible. But "not today" or "not right now" works.

Jay

Kery
04-18-2007, 02:54 AM
It does really depend on how much your tastes change. Things that I thought used to taste good, now taste too sweet, taste too greasy or taste too chemically so I don't eat them. They aren't what I want to eat though. If there is something that you really want to eat, then if you plan for it, I see no reason for it not to be part of your eating plan.
True that. Some habits change overtime, replaced by healthier ones. I can barely touch half-fat milk now: at first, skim milk sounded like something awful, then I tried it, got used to it, and now the rest 'feels too fatty for me', something like this. Some for other types of food. I also used to work in a McDonald's a few years ago, I was used to eating there, like, twice a DAY *shudders*, and now I have one about 50m from home, yet I must go there once every two months, when friends really want me to come with them, not otherwise.

Of course, there are some things we also can't let go for good. I can't let go of dark chocolate, even though I don't feel like eating some every day. Or coffee. Thanks God I like my coffee/tea without sugar or milk, or it'd be awful. :dizzy:

"Not today" seems like a good strategy, now that I think of it. I'll need to try that for my 'weakness foods'. It's true that thinking we're FORBIDDEN to have it toys with human nature in general, a.k.a what's forbidden becomes suddenly a must-have, even if it's not that desirable in itself to start with. So it's best not to wake up that sleeping animal. ^^