what are some of the things you are missing out on? - 3 Fat Chicks on a Diet Weight Loss Community

pinupdreams · 03-26-2007, 07:55 PM

what are some of the things that you feel that you are missing out on the most due to your size. things you feel you cant do right now because of your weight, like an activity or something? in my case, im young and i feel as if im missing out on life as i know it because of my weight. i dont go out as much as i would love to, i cant wear certain clothing that is in style for girls my age, ect basically.

Sheila53 · 03-26-2007, 08:27 PM

You know, thinking about this question is really pretty painful. I think the thing I missed out on most was doing stuff with my daughter when she was a teenager. Because I was the only fat mom, I felt uncomfortable around all her friends so I withdrew. And I didn't set a good example for her.

While I applaud (and envy) those people who can do anything they want at any size, I wasn't one of them. I'm so glad you're doing something about your weight while you're still young and can enjoy life to the fullest. While your basic personality won't change, and all your problems won't disappear when you reach your goal weight, there's a lot to be said about being comfortable in your own skin, which I certainly wasn't when I weighed 261.

LakeGirl · 03-26-2007, 09:31 PM

Being forty, I can very much appreciate pinup's wanting to be an active young person! I've been overweight since I was like six, so I was very much in the same boat!

At my age now, I would like to be more active with my kids; hiking, bike riding, swimming etc. On a more shallow note (at least compared to my first reason!) I have never been able to shop in a regular clothing store and I feel like I have missed out on that. Even walking through the mall, there are so many nice stores for women and I so want to go in there! Actually, there is a shop downtown that I have resolved that I WILL walk in one day and purchase a nice springy outfit (they always have the best window displays!).

HotDoc · 03-26-2007, 10:02 PM

pants......i cannot fit into ANY of my pants. i wear skirts all the time. i refuse to buy more pants. i also helped sabatoge my last relationship due to my poor self esteem. yeah.

kaepepper · 03-26-2007, 10:03 PM

I've missed out on care-free dancing! I'm always so extremely self-conscious of what I look like, and I'm never in clothing that I feel looks fashionable or whatever. You know, the "dance like no one is watching" - I've missed out on that. Also, just enjoying myself at a party and being interested about the people I meet and topics of conversation without the constant obsession with how I look so big and my clothes feel too snug. And - hiking! I tried hiking in the White Mountains in New Hampshire a couple of years ago, about 15 pounds lighter than I am now, and it was so difficult on my knees. Even though I loved the feeling of being in nature and the great sights from up high in the mountains, I am reluctant to do it again until I'm lighter.

Currydi · 03-26-2007, 10:09 PM

I understand where you are coming from. I grew up all during grade school and high school overweight....no dates, no parties, no nice clothes all the skinny girls were wearing, not to mention other kids making fun of me all the time....it's a hard fact but society frowns upon others who are overweight yet they don't understand the struggles we face.
Looking back on everything though, I realize that all of it finally lead up to me wanting and being able to make the necessary changes in my life that were required to lose weight, look good, but most importantly feel good and be comfortable with myself.
When I was young, I was over eating to compensate for being lonely....I sat at home and did nothing.....no walking, riding bikes, etc., cause people made fun of me. I wasn't one of those people who was comfortable as is and feel I missed out on a lot. But, if it hadn't been for all of that, I wouldn't be where I am today. I work out, religously, (even though I don't want to at times), try (key word here is try) to eat right, and tell myself that no matter what others thought of me or how they perceived me, I know I can lose weight, and I did.

Dawn2Dusk · 03-26-2007, 10:54 PM

The ability to be myself. I've always been a little on the introverted side by choice, but never shy or intimidated. Ever since I let myself get so big, I've had self esteem issues in the worst way. My self confidence has plummeted to an all-time low.

beautifulone · 03-26-2007, 11:09 PM

Pinupdreams, your summed it up very well actually. I feel like I have missed out on part of my adolescence and my university years. I feel like clothing and body comfort has so much to do with it, which is sad because as Sheila said, there are people who can do anything at any size. I truly admire them. I've been so quiet and timid, that combined with serious self-esteem issues... I just haven't been able to step outside of myself. I'm working on it which is great but that takes time and as that time ticks, I feel like I'm missing out on a period of my life that is coming to an end. It's sad. I'm determined that this is where it stops.

I also feel like I'm missing out on travel. I want to volunteer abroad but I feel like even as far as temperature goes in many tropical places, I'd have to wear shorts and well me in shorts.. not good. I want to be phsyically strong and fit for when I travel, I feel like I will be safer that way and much more physically comfortable.

SexyRevealed · 03-27-2007, 12:02 AM

I guess I'm one of those girls who almost always felt pretty comfortable. I've been overweight since a child as well, and I kind of came into my own in my 20's. I partied, I dated, I had a blast. Some things I'm looking forward to are things that my size absolutely won't let me do, like ride rollercoasters and water slides at the amusement park. And shopping in regular stores, which I've NEVER done. I can't wait!!!

mandalinn82 · 03-27-2007, 12:07 AM

For me, it was horseback riding...and other things with weight limits.

On our honeymoon, we're taking a jungle horseback ride in Mexico, followed by a walking tour of a local tequila factory.

In fact, I checked - I am officially under the weight limit for every excursion on the honeymoon.

Charbar · 03-27-2007, 12:12 AM

I think I've missed out on people taking me seriously. I really think people believe I'm not good enough. I'm also short (btw.. what's with all the 5 footers lately.. wow!) So I here I am fat and short.

I think I have gotten sloppy. No clothes look good on me. I've missed out on high heels! I've missed out on caring for myself. Treating myself. ie. makeup, hair cuts, etc.

I think my kids have missed out a bit too. Sorry, but for me.. fat = lazy. My 7 year still doesn't know how to ride a bike. And that's because I'm fat. That's the truth.

PERAXIES · 03-27-2007, 02:22 AM

Oh i can so relate to this thread... gee i feel like i miss out on a lot... Swimming for me mostly... i love to swim, and when i was thinner, i was so self conscience. and thought i was so fat. and looking back i really wasnt.. i was pretty trim. and i let that get in the way of a lot. . i wish i could swim now.. but i just wouldnt feel right at this weight. also a lot of things you all said too. . going out dancing, party's.. i went to a party a while back and i was the only person overweight... i was so ashamed i had left early.. i still hate leaving the house. . and i feel as if people wonder what my dear boyfriend is doing with such a 'fat chick' -- oh well.. were all changing soon!! and i will be back in shape and supremely happy again!!! we all will!!

03-27-2007, 02:33 AM

Currydi, beautifulone, and Kristen-- I am on the same page with you.

We'll make it!!

I'm also caught in the middle somehow... I think I "went for it" in high school and was very social, etc. but it's the *inside* feelings that kept me doing a lot of things such as dance lessons, drama club, etc. Looking back, I don't think anyone but me would have been so uncomfortable about my size...

Oh well, live and learn.

Lillibeth · 03-27-2007, 04:04 AM

I think the thing I'm missing out most on is feeling comfertable in my own skin. I always feel that I am taking up too much space and so should be the one to move out of the way when passing someone on a sidewalk, stand-up on a tram, apologise if someone bumps into me etc. I'm really looking forward to being able to hold my head up high and not feel inferior all the time.

RitzyFritz · 03-27-2007, 06:29 AM

Missed a TON of activities with my kids, lack of confidence in my private married live (this has been a HUGE issue for me), feeling inferior to my peers and turning down activities/invitations - all because of my weight! What a waste! No more....I'm coming out of my corner...and I'm going to enjoy every minute of the new me! I've missed too much already; it's time to make up for it all!!

Let's do it, Ladies (and gentlemen)!!