Support Groups - Brides to be

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03-15-2007, 11:18 AM
I was wondering if any other engaged ladies out there would be interested in starting a new thread? I know everyone wants to look fit and fabulous on her wedding day. Plus we could dish about wedding planning, dress shopping (ugh!) and other things like that.

I’ve been engaged for about a month and we’re planning to have our wedding in May 2008. My weight loss has been stalled since last summer due to lots of things (moving, lack of motivation, beer and pizza :o) but now I’m back on the wagon and hoping to lose about 30 lbs before the big day.

If you’re interested, please introduce yourself!

03-15-2007, 11:37 AM
I would definately be interested, I am getting married October 2007, so I have to get on it! I wanted to lose 50 pounds but I don't think I can do it in 7 month, however, I want to lose as much as I can before August (final time to get my dress altered).

03-15-2007, 12:25 PM
My boyfriend just proposed to me on Monday :D I have been engaged now for not even 3 whole days :dizzy: But of course, being a woman, I have already thought about us getting married, getting a ring, having a wedding, having kids, all that jazz, long before he proposed ;)

We're at a loss for wedding ideas. I hate dancing, so a typical reception is OUT for us, but I still want to have a gathering of friends and family. We'll figure it out in time--and we do have plenty of time. I don't want to even think about any real plans until after we move into our new home together in the fall (our apartment lease runs out in November, so we are planning to buy a townhouse together). Also, my parents are about to embark on a big move (from Connecticut to Virginia Beach), so as I explained it to my mother and sister, I don't want to start planning anything until my parents are moved and settled and Jeff and I are moved and settled--that way, everyone's focus can be on ME! :p

03-15-2007, 12:27 PM
Congrats jillybean!

03-15-2007, 12:29 PM
Jilly - OH MY GOODNESS - congrats.

Well, I'd love to be on the thread for the 5 weeks of wedding planning I have left...April 21st!

03-15-2007, 01:17 PM
Thanks, guys! I am soooo interested in what others are doing for their weddings--locations, colors, receptions, ceremonies, dresses--the whole shabang.

I do know that if I go with something formal/organized enough to pick colors, I want to use a deep royal blue and deep jewel-tone purple with bright turquoise accents. That's as far as I've gotten :p

03-15-2007, 01:36 PM
:congrat: Jill! Plus a new home, you must be super excited.

Madalinn – At 5 weeks left to go I do hope most of the planning is done! I know I will probably be a wreck by that point.

I like picking out colors too, picking the bridal party has been a little trickier. You never want to hurt anyone’s feelings or leave anyone out and there’s a pressure to meet everyone’s expectations. Plus we just have a lot more close friends and family that are girls than guys, and my fiancé is kind of set on having an even number of girls to guys. sigh Well, at least there’s plenty of time to work that out.

We did find a place last weekend that we’re interested in having the ceremony at. It was under snow of course, but it should be stunning in the spring, there are some nice pictures on their website. We’re hoping to have the reception at the UW Memorial Union, but it books up really fast so we need to get on that (yes, even more than a year in advance). It would be really cool if we could do the whole thing on campus since we met back in our school days there.

03-15-2007, 03:19 PM
Wow, that garden is gorgeous!

I'm going to cheat a bit on the wedding party because this should not be a tressful thing for me. I only have 1 sister, and I was maid of honor at both of her weddings (hopefully, she is done having weddings), so she will be my Natron o fHonor. The end. No bridesmaids required :p Then I won't have to worry about anyoone's dress not matching or not being hemmed to the same length or the dress I want not coming in someone's size (as was a concern when my sister was picking out a dres for the bridal party--would it come in plus sizes for ME??), and no one's feelings should be hurt since my sister is my only sister, and everyone understands that. I've already even told my best friend from college that I'm probably not having bridesmaids (which is fine by her since it's an added expense she doesn't have to worry about ;) ).

03-15-2007, 03:44 PM
Madalinn – At 5 weeks left to go I do hope most of the planning is done! I know I will probably be a wreck by that point.

Um - no. Sure, you have your overarching things set - invitations sent, caterers and sites and alcohol and DJ and all of that stuff set up. Dresses at the seamstress, bridesmaid dresses delivered. Honeymoon booked. A lot of the BIG stuff is taken care of. But then you have to track responses, plan rehearsal dinners, pick up all kinds of things from all kinds of places, set a song list, assemble favors, finalize the ceremony, finalize the timeline, arrange everyones schedule, make sure everyone has travel arrangements, start shopping and packing for honeymoon, pick a first dance song, make sure all of your guys have tuxes taken care of, order attendant gifts, wrap attendant gifts, assemble programs, make seating charts...

03-15-2007, 04:10 PM
OK, OCD Bride alert. If you ask for wedding will get them! Also, wedding-with-two-brides alert...if that isn't your thing, please skip.

First, for our overall vision check out Those are approximately our colors, you can get a vague idea of our plans from there. The colors are lavender and a sort of pale sage-green color, with a little bit of shimmer in them.

Sarah is a floral designer. I know nothing of the flowers except that I had to spend 3 months working on and off on a website for her company to pay for her vision. But at least they are free, now. So far, she has filled me in on some of the plans - bluebird roses, green cymbidium orchid on every napkin ring (!!), white orchid bouts/corsages for the parents, green orchid bouts for the gentleman attendants. The centerpieces involve hydrangeas. All of the tables are named after favorite flowers of ours, which fits with the floral-sort-of theme. We are putting a single, bright color gerbera daisy (my favorite flower) in each of the out of town baskets, along with some snack foods, water, and information about the festivities/things to do in Berkeley.

We are having our ceremony and reception here:

The ceremony is going to be simple, short, and facing out on this gorgeous green hillside under a small arch. Sarah's step-father, who is important in her life but still not a -father- figure to her, is going to officiate (we wanted him to have an important role in the ceremony, but not try to fit him into the "father" role - her bio dad will do that anyway). The reception is going to consist of a buffet meal, some dancing, and karaoke (which I could not be more thrilled about - already people are practicing, its madness!). Wine, beer, and champagne. Our biggest splurge (other than the bartered flowers) was hiring a bus to transport our guests up and down the hill to the site so everyone can drink as they wish, then get home safely...its worth the money to have everyone be safe.

Dresses - they coordinate but do not'd be surprised how hard it is to pick out dresses that mesh for two brides:
Me (ignore all the pins - the seamstress literally had to take it in from an 18W to a 10/12, and I finally get to see the finished product on Saturday:
That bridesmaid is my sister...also getting married on July 21st! Yeah, in a brilliant time-management move, I am throwing her a shower the weekend before my wedding.

Menu (is this too much detail? LOL. People should know better than to ask me these things):

Appetizers (passed during cocktail time):
-Caramelized Onions and Brie in Baked Phyllo
-Bruschetta with Tomato, Garlic, Olive Oil, and Fresh Basil

-Sonoma Chicken Breast with Meyer Lemon and Rosemary
-Lamb with Rosemary and Garlic

-Field Greens with Roasted Garlic Vinaigrette, Sweet-Spicy Pecans, and Feta
-Pencil thin asparagus with roasted garlic and sesame vinaigrette
-Tomatoes and Yellow/Green Zucchini baked with Parmesan Cheese and Fresh Herbs
-Caramelized Petaluma Brie with strawberries and crackers
-Petite Red Potatoes, served with sour cream
-Potato Rolls and Seeded Baguettes, served with sweet butter

Plus wine, beer, champagne, sodas, and this AMAZING meyer lemon and blueberry punch. For the champagne toast, we're floating blueberries in each glass. I am super excited about our catering because they use local, organic ingredients whenever possible and donate leftovers to homeless shelters in the area.

Cake - it is square, has three tiers. Each tier is frosted in white buttercream, then wrapped around the base with a lavender fondant ribbon colored based on the paper sample from our invitation. Then, piped onto the sides (in white - its more textural than truly visible piping) is our invitation motif...a little cartoon flower that is so cute. The bottom layer is princess...white cake with raspberry preserves, vanilla buttercream, and a little almond paste. The top two tiers are valencia - chocolate cake brushed with grand marnier, with dark chocolate mousse, a thin layer of orange marmalade, and a hint of candied orange peel. The top will be decorated with, what else, more flowers.

The worst details for me (in terms of being ashamed of my obvious OCD) - the bathroom baskets! I hand-molded soaps in our wedding colors and scents and bought little dishes for them to go in, then assembled baskets to put in the bathrooms of things like mints, hairspray, lotion, tylenol, antacids, lint rollers, extra things in the womens, like hygiene products and bobby pins...and THEN bought disposable guest towels (you know - the paper-towel-like things that are a little thicker and softer that are sometimes in bathrooms?) in our wedding colors to go next to them.

03-15-2007, 05:53 PM
Amanda – 1) You just made my head explode. 2) You and Sarah are adorable! 3) Will you come plan my wedding?

Seriously, hand molded soaps in your wedding colors and scents, you are some sort of super-bride!

That’s funny about your colors, I was thinking about that yesterday and decided I wanted the bridesmaids in either a purply-blue (like cornflower) or a dusty green (celadon). Isn’t it crazy how planning this stuff makes you learn the nuances of color names! I also want purple hydrangeas with some sort of green and maybe pink accents. Originally I wanted tulips, but tulip stems go south pretty fast, I don’t think they’d make it through a whole day. I might use potted tulips as centerpieces for the reception.

That’s cool that you can get Sarah’s step dad to officiate. We’re going to get a Justice of the Peace but aren’t sure how to go about finding one.

Where did you find your dresses? I’m not crazy about anything at David’s Bridal. Also, good to know that a seamstress can take a dress in from an 18 to a 10/12. I was wondering how that would work since I will (hopefully) be a smaller size on the wedding day than when I choose the dress. I had some issues getting my bridesmaid dress altered properly for my sisters wedding, the top ended up being about 2 sizes too big and it didn’t really lay they way it was supposed to even after the alterations.

So much to think about! I’m glad I have more than a year to get this together.

03-15-2007, 06:20 PM
WOW. Amanda, that is AWESOME! Everything you've picked and shown and described is fabulous. I especially love how well your gowns coordinate without being exactly the same. You will both look so amazing (you know, once all those pins are removed ;) ). And from the photos on your site, it's clear you've lost a ton of weight--you look so great!

Karaoke at the reception--I saw that as an idea on another site since I don't really want to have dancing at my reception, but I'm not sure our families would be very enthusiastic about it. I bet I'd be the only one singing all night :p Jeff and I don't drink (I'll have a drink once in a while, maybe 3 times a year; he won't drink at all), so we probably won't have much for alcohol, either, which would only add to the lack of enthusiasm for karaoke, I'm sure ;)

03-15-2007, 06:44 PM
1) You just made my head explode. 2) You and Sarah are adorable! 3) Will you come plan my wedding?

1) Not as much as mine is exploding
2) Thank you!
3) I think I might literally keel over if I tried to do this twice. This time at least, I have a big fat vacation at the end to relax on (10 day cruise to the Mexican Riviera in a SUITE with a private deck! SO EXCITED).

Where did you find your dresses? I’m not crazy about anything at David’s Bridal. Also, good to know that a seamstress can take a dress in from an 18 to a 10/12. I was wondering how that would work since I will (hopefully) be a smaller size on the wedding day than when I choose the dress. I had some issues getting my bridesmaid dress altered properly for my sisters wedding, the top ended up being about 2 sizes too big and it didn’t really lay they way it was supposed to even after the alterations.

Well, I actually did get my dress at David's, but am making some design changes to it (taking the back from a zip-up to a corset back). I think the reason it can be taken in so much is that my seamstress actually specializes in restoration of heirloom gowns and custom gown design, so she is used to resizing gowns for the next generation (for example, if you are wearing your mothers dress). This way, the dress itself was fairly cheap so I could spend some more on making it unique with the corset back, and to pay for the extensive sizing.

Originally I wanted tulips, but tulip stems go south pretty fast, I don’t think they’d make it through a whole day. I might use potted tulips as centerpieces for the reception.

Want me to ask the woman? She might be able to recommend ways to make them hold for a reception, or another flower with a similar look. She is good at stuff like that. My sister and cousin are getting married (July and June, respectively) and Sarah is doing the flowers for both.

Seriously, hand molded soaps in your wedding colors and scents, you are some sort of super-bride!

They are molded into little flower shapes. To match the theme. :-)

WOW. Amanda, that is AWESOME! Everything you've picked and shown and described is fabulous. I especially love how well your gowns coordinate without being exactly the same. You will both look so amazing (you know, once all those pins are removed ). And from the photos on your site, it's clear you've lost a ton of weight--you look so great!

Thank you! Dress fitting on Saturday, so I'll have pictures of the dress in my actual size...i can't wait! We were 18s when the engagement pics were taken, and I am a 12, she is a 14 now. The new avatar pic is actually at our joint bridal shower on March 4th.

03-16-2007, 04:06 PM
I am so happy I found you ladies... may I join? We're not officially engaged yet, but the boy and I have been looking at rings for 3 months now (holy cow, some day we will find the right one!) and we are sort of planning to get married this August. It is really exciting and I am super happy! We are thinking seriously about buying a house this May or June, having the summer to fix it up together, then getting married in August before he goes back to school.

Mandalinn- I hope you don't think I'm stalking you, but I was thinking about you and your wedding plans this week! I am so thrilled with your continued weight loss, and your wedding sounds GORGEOUS. I'm sure it is going to come off beautifully, and I hope you will be willing to share pictures with us.

Jilly- Hi! Congrats on your engagement! I am so happy for you... My boy and I are not big drinkers. And typical dj dancing is not exactly our cup of tea, either. One idea I had was to have an afternoon wedding so that people didn't expect a bunch of drink, then having DDR, Guitar Hero, and Wii at the reception. Haha, I don't know if the family would ever go for it, but it sounded FUN to me.

Jade- Hi! I look forward to getting to know you better.

shananigans- Cool, thanks for starting this thread. Hopefully we will be able to support one another. I do hope to lose a little more weight before August. I am trying to be easy on myself. I may make a goal of 10 pounds. I know what you mean about wedding party- I am struggling. Since I like the idea of having a more informal ceremony anyway, I am hoping I can get away with just doing my two closest friends from girlhood, and not have a huge bridal party. If I do more than 2, I may end up with 6, sigh....

As for my plans, we haven't decided anything yet, since we are still not that "official" engaged, but we love the idea of an outdoor wedding. We have talked about having the ceremony at a local park or woods, then the reception there, too. There is a local pioneer village we have considered. I love the idea of having it outdoors so that people can play and hike in the woods and do those sort of things.

And colors, I LOVE pink and gold. It is very girly and seems cute and vintagy.

03-16-2007, 04:12 PM
One idea I had was to have an afternoon wedding so that people didn't expect a bunch of drink, then having DDR, Guitar Hero, and Wii at the reception

Thats so great! You could do almost an arcade feeling - they even rent photo booths (like you find at arcades) that your guests could use as a guestbook - tape the little 4-snapshot printout into a book and write a little message beneath. I am all about non-traditional receptions...we tried to blend the traditional (because, er, the wedding itself is rather untraditional) with some funky fun things like the karaoke.

No, I'm not scared you're stalking me! The wedding is all I think about too! :)

03-16-2007, 04:25 PM
Can I just say its really nice to have a spot where I can spew forth wedding details and people care? LOL.

03-16-2007, 04:30 PM
Christine, I think you read my mind! We don't have a Wii yet (they're insanely hard to come by around here), but i'm sure we will by the time we actually are ready to get married. We have played Guitar Hero together before, and my sister has a few DDR game pads. I was actually thinking of maybe just having our recption in the party room of like a Jillian's or a Dave and Busters so it was actually IN an arcade. We shall see...

03-16-2007, 04:32 PM
Jill - Congrats!!!

I had my wedding at a restored traditional white chapel in MD. It accomodated the small wedding that I was going for and had a nice quaint white chapel feel. Then I had my reception at Buca di Beppo. Instead of wedding cake, we had their chocolate cake and cheesecake (to die for!) Best part is since we went for a simple small wedding, the gifts we received more than paid for the wedding.

Flowers - I bought 2 alter flowers, a bouquet of mix "fall colors" (gorgeous!) and flowers for the parents. Total cost was about $200.

Maid of honor? Bridesmaids? Best man? Groomsmen? we didn't have any. Was nice for our small wedding

Dress - bought one at David's bridal for $99. It was actually a light yellow bridesmaid dress.

Hair - Definitely got my hair and nails done before the wedding. I went to the Red Door spa and did it, very nice. I'm in love with that place now.

Photography - We splurged on this a little because we figured we wanted good pictures of our wedding. We got a few print photos but the photographer that we used offered us the entire DVD of all the pictures they took at the wedding. So I have hundreds of photos, which I am in the process of creating picture CDs for my family and if I find a website with enough free space, it will go on the web too.

Rings - we decided to splurge on rings a little too. Not the "2 months salary" thing but more than my initial thoughts. We figured we'd have the rings for life so that was more important than splurging on a wedding which lasts 1 day. I highly highly recommend the place we went to which is called Charleston Alexander. They have locations in MD but I think they have locations in VA as well. If nothing else, you can look at their website for ideas.

As for losing weight before the wedding, I was able to lose about 25 lbs or so. It helped a lot especially since the wedding dress was super tight when I bought it :)

Congrats to all the brides to be!

03-16-2007, 04:43 PM
ha, 2 months' salary on a ring--who ever came up with that "standard?" My sister called me during the week to see if we wanted them to take us to where her husband got her ring. As much as I like her ring, I told her that, no, multiple thousands of dollars is not within our price range (her ring cost about $5k).

For us, our number 1 financial goal right now is to purchase a townhouse in the fall (will run us about $300k--yes, for just a townhouse, squished between 2 others, no garage, and that's with us being flexible enough to move about 15 -20 miles further away from the city than we are now :dizzy: ), so any and all extravagant purchases will have to wait till after that.

While we will be going ring shopping soon, it is strictly to see what looks and feels appropriate. I 99% doubt that we will end up buying my ring from a jeweler, but rather that I will figure out what I want and then buy something that looks just like it online with an imitation diamond rather than a real one (if I even choose something with a diamond--blue sapphires and deep amethysts are also on my radar). As long as the setting is a good white gold or platinum, we can worry about purchasing a real diamond when we're more financially capable in the future.

03-16-2007, 04:53 PM
While we will be going ring shopping soon, it is strictly to see what looks and feels appropriate. I 99% doubt that we will end up buying my ring from a jeweler, but rather that I will figure out what I want and then buy something that looks just like it online with an imitation diamond rather than a real one (if I even choose something with a diamond--blue sapphires and deep amethysts are also on my radar). As long as the setting is a good white gold or platinum, we can worry about purchasing a real diamond when we're more financially capable in the future.

Definitely look at Ebay - there are a ton of both natural and created diamond rings in all kinds of styles, for fractions of the cost that you'll pay at a jewelery store. Sarah and I had two proposals - one from her to me, one from me to her - and both of us got the rings on Ebay - they were natural diamond, both white gold, and cost us approximately $400 each. We were very happy with them (though we recently did an upgrade like you plan, Jilly, because our financial circumstances had improved...we originally proposed on a college student budget).

Are you signed up for Wii alerts? You can get them text-messaged to your phone when a Wii comes into a store near you. This is how my sister (who lives in Arlington) got hers:

Or monitor this site:

03-16-2007, 04:57 PM
Are you signed up for Wii alerts? You can get them text-messaged to your phone when a Wii comes into a store near you. This is how my sister (who lives in Arlington) got hers:

Or monitor this site:
I don't do text messages on my phone, and I've checked a bunch of those Wii locator sites. A lot of them for some reason recently changed to only show Amazon, Ebay, Craigslist, and I think Walmart, whereas they also used to show Toys R Us and Target. I also found a link to find out when Target might have them, and it actually linked to a Target page that showed the availability of the Wii in loval stores. Most said "Out of Stock," but a few said they had them, so we called them all, and they all pretty much laughed at us and said no, they were out. We'd rather wait a few more months for one at a normal price than to pay for the bundles that have games we don't want or to pay some jerk on Ebay/Craigslist who got one and didn't want it for anything other than to make a profit. So we will just have to continue to be patient :^:

03-16-2007, 05:01 PM
I completely understand the townhome thing! DH and I plan to buy a townhome, most likely next year. The one good thing is prices are dropping here. Nearly 2 years ago, townhomes in the area we wanted were around $400k, now they are in the lower $300s. I'm hoping if I hold off until next year, they'll drop even further.

Also about gems/rings/etc, I did a lot of investigative research before we actually went ring shopping. We considered plain irish bands (dh is irish), we considered other gem stones, no gem stones, etc. I don't particularly care for created diamonds but I like natural gemstones so something like moissanite is also a good alternative. I like sapphires and rubies and emeralds($$$ but my birthstone) so I looked at all sorts of alternatives. And oh yeah, that "2 month" salary thing came from jewelers of course and I've known people that have actually tried to stick to it! Yikes!

I also told DH that he was to not buy me any more jewelry after this and there will be no upgrades in the future. We did go with platinum though mostly because I found out that I'm allergic to gold (although I also researched and found out the allergy is probably only american gold, other countries use silver in their gold, we use nickel).

03-16-2007, 05:05 PM
Hi Jill

I would definitely recommend looking on Ebay, as well. Especially if you are interested in a diamond ring, you can buy one for SO much less money than from a jeweler. I don't know if it's some sort of stigma about having someone else's ring or what. I have seen some beautiful rings on there. (I have found this true for second-hand wedding gowns, as well, if you are thinking about the cost of a gown)

Sapphires are gorgeous if you are considering that option, and they are much less expensive than diamonds, as I'm sure you are aware. One thing that jewelers have cautioned us about, though, is that sapphires are not as hard as diamonds, and can get scratched or chipped. We have looked at rubies as an alternative to diamonds, as they are very strong. BUT they can get just as expensive as diamonds.

PS- that is so crazy about your housing market! It makes me be glad to be in the midwest. We expect to get a 3 bed 2 bath house with a yard, and we can find a nice one for less than $110.

03-17-2007, 02:25 AM
hello everyone, my fiance and i got engaged Jan. 9th of this year. He proposed to me on top of a mountain in Colorado on our annual snowboarding trip. It was soo sweet and a total surprise! (though we have been dating for almost 7 years and no one else was surprised) He knows how picky i am about jewerly so he got me earrings instead and when we came home, we went to pick a ring together. He said he researched different school of thoughts on proposing...i'm so proud of him. Anyway, we're planning for an Aug. 08 wedding, hopefully i will be done with my Masters and if i get into a Doctoral program that won't start till Sept. But i have to say i am the worlds worst bride. I never even considered what i would want a wedding to be like until he i'm screwed, i have no clue what goes into a wedding, my mom asked me what colors i want and i kinda just stared at her. Colors???? Flowers?? Location???? DRESS??!?!?!?! totally clueless...I hope to pawn off most of the planning to someone else. However, i am using this as part of the reason i want to lose weight. Congrats to everyone here and good luck with all the wedding stuff!

03-17-2007, 02:33 AM
Nickname - welcome! August '08 gives you tons of time to plan, so don't worry! Also, once you pick a location, things fall into place a lot easier, so go scouting for spots and relax!

03-17-2007, 02:34 AM

after looking at all your plans for your wedding i have to ask....Do you take personal checks? siiiiiigh....the only thing i kinda have a clue about is where i want to get my cake .

03-17-2007, 02:42 AM
Nickname- Hi! Welcome and congrats! Mandalinn is awesome with all her plans, is she not? I would just like to echo her thoughts- relax and have fun with it! Just thought I would mention a few of the things that all the wedding books tell you to do first-

"Envision" your wedding. Think about what you want.
Talk with your fiance and family about budget. Knowing about how much you can spend helps you narrow down choices.
Come up with a preliminary guest list- knowing about how many people you would like to invite really helps.

Best of luck to you. Don't let yourself get overwhelmed, because, really, this is just a fun party to celebrate YOU!

03-17-2007, 02:55 AM
OMG you're going to have a charm city cake? I worship charm city cakes. Seriously. If only they were in California....

Trust me when I say that once you all hit the 5 week mark, you'll have this many details or more. Its so overwhelming at the beginning. Start with a vision and a general number of guests, and a rough budget. From there, pick a site, and pick a concept.

Once you have a concept, its a lot easier to pick the details. For example, we had the colors and the flower motif as our concept, it was easier to pick the invitations, the bridesmaid dresses, the table all falls into place a lot easier than it would seem. I promise.

I am good with concept, so if people have ideas that they need fleshed out, I am decent at matching details to the concept. I am doing that for my sister's wedding quite a bit (she is GREAT with details, and bad with overall vision) - and happy to help (especially once I get back from the honeymoon and have more time...

03-18-2007, 02:21 AM
Mandalinn82 i just love the things they can do at charm city cakes, though i don't know what kind i want. But, like you said once i get a concept, it will fall into place. i want my bouquet to be gerbera daisies, i LOVE them. Wishing all the best for your wedding!

03-18-2007, 07:22 AM
I love Gerberas. We are putting a single gerbera into each of our out of town baskets that are going in guest hotel rooms - such a bright punch of color to put into a room.

03-18-2007, 11:19 AM
Mandalinn- I'm still reading though your thread - but I'm curious about the dress and sizes - that's what I'm struggling with the most. My wedding is in late September and I'm working hard to get in shape, so I really hesitate to buy a dress in the 16W that fits me now. How long ago did you buy your dress? Should I just not worry about it, and have faith in the gal doing my alterations?

03-18-2007, 04:08 PM
Cindy - I bought my dress in an 18W, last October, which was about 7 months before the wedding. Because of that, I had to take it in quite a bit and find a specialty alterations lady. However, if you find someone good to do your alterations, you should be ok! If you have joined The Knot, there are "local" boards - you can post on one of the local boards for your area for alterations recommendations.

03-18-2007, 06:06 PM
I love tulips but I had my wedding in the fall so tulips were expensive. The flowers we went for were great, they are also known as peruvian tulips?

They are in season in the fall. I think they are my favorite flower now.

03-18-2007, 06:36 PM
Hi everyone - I'm glad to have this thread here as well!

DF and I started looking at rings last February, ordered one in May, and finally got engaged in August. He had the diamond from a previous engagement, but had bought it down in St.Thomas, so it was very reasonably priced. We looked into trading it in, but then they want you to trade up, and we didn't want to put more money into it. At first I was a bit weird about the fact that he'd given it to someone else, but it actually wasn't the one he proposed with - when they got that one appraised, it wasn't the quality he'd been promised, so it was returned and this one was sent as a replacement. So, once we knew it wasn't feasibly financially, I decided I could be ok with this one, especially since it's 1.04 ct! (I like to just pretend we got it from eBay!) My setting is from Somos Creations - I wanted something antique-looking and they had some nice choices. All the rings are made-to-order, which is why it took so long - that and I made some tweaks to the ring, so the standard version of it had to be hand-crafted for me. Now I need to find a wedding band to go with - this one didn't have one to match, so I am struggling with that. It sits higher on my finger, so a standard band, which I would be fine with, is just too low to be next to it. - this site shows my ring - it's the in the 6th row, the third one over. My band is 18k yellow gold, with platinum shoulders and head.

Can you tell I love my ring? :)

Ok, anyway, the wedding is September 29th of this year. I live in the Albany NY area, but the wedding will be in Michigan. Fun doing this all long-distance.

Wedding should be around 80 guests, if I can get DF to keep it that small. The fact that all his friends and family will have to travel from NY to MI should keep that list smaller than it would be.

I have a DJ, a photographer, the church and reception location. I've decided to do individual table cakes for centerpieces on each table, and my mom may be doing them (probably 12 tables), so we'll save $$ there.

Wedding party is small -just my sister and DF's niece for me, his brother and nehphew for him.

Flowers are still a big question mark. I LOVE tulips, so may splurge on them just for me, then something more seasonal for the gals. I may do potted mums in the church and around the reception, and then just something for the head table.

I went looking at dresses at David's Briday just this past Friday. I really don't want strapless or sleeveless, but there are few options. My arms are my biggest trouble area, even when I'm in better shape, so I'd rather not be showing them off. Has anyone seen anything with sleeves by anyone?

I've narrowed what David's has down to about 10 that I plan to try on soon, but will check some other bridal stores soon. I'm still thinking I may do something less formal- maybe a nice mother's dress, or even a bridesmaid dress - I just have to start looking and looking...

Not sure on colors yet - I want to go with fall colors - something like gold and red, or burnt orange, but it will really depend on the dress styles and color availability.

For favors I really like the "perfect pair" candles - getting those on eBay, and then am doing a clear favor box w/gold ribbon containing Juicy Pear jelly bellys in them to go with. That is all gold and green, so that's another possibility for the color scheme. We plan to do silk autumn-colored leaves on the tables.

Thats about all so far. I guess the dress is really my next big focus for now.

Oh, and for our honeymoon we are splurging on a European cruise on Royal Caribbean. Barcelona, Nice, Florence, Rome, Naples and Sicily. A rather hectic schedule, but we wanted to go to Europe, but wanted it to be easy. A floating hotel room helps!

03-18-2007, 07:31 PM
Cindy - wow, your plans sound amazing! We are also doing the cruise honeymoon, but we didn't want to fly, so we're going to Mexico. Europe was definitely on our short list, though - just couldn't work it with flights.

I have dress fitting pictures for you ladies!

Those give you a fairly good view of the back...

And finally of Sarah:

03-18-2007, 07:49 PM
I just lost a long response. Oh well...

Cindy- Your wedding plans sound lovely so far. I am running into the same problem that you are with sleeved dresses- I would like one with sleeves probably, but so many of the options are sleeveless, especially at david's. One dress shop lady told me to not rule out sleeveless, since a bolero is always an option. If I come across anything good I will let you know. :)

Mandalinn- Your dress is looking lovely! with the primary reason being how slim you are looking- congratulations, I hope you are really happy with your success.

Nelie- Those flowers are pretty, I like them. I may have to keep those in mind. :)

Well, I'm off. Everyone take care!

03-19-2007, 03:20 AM
Nelie, the flowers you want are sooo pretty! and i love your dress Mandalinn! You both look so great!

03-19-2007, 11:10 AM
Well, while you guys are all on to flowers and gowns and final countdowns, I think I may have found the engagement ring I want :dizzy: I originally was thinking of maybe not having a big center diamond because I really want something different, but I think I found it over the weekend. I can NOT, though, for the life of me, find a picture of it anywhere online, even though I saw the same setting in 3 different stores yesterday, which is really frustrating because I want a picture of it.

Anyway, my best to describe it: it's white gold (I don't really wear yellow gold jewelry, so I knew I wanted white gold), and it has a round diamond in the center with a deep blue sapphire on each side. What makes it really unique is that the sapphires on the sides are not round nor baguettes, but rather they are square stones tilted to be diamond shape. There are also small round channel-set diamonds on the band--I prefer not to have a plain band.

03-19-2007, 11:32 AM
madalinn – You look just stunning, the dress looks like it fits perfectly. I’d love it if you could get Sarah’s opinion on the tulips and if there’s a way to get them to last throughout the day.

Jason totally surprised me with the ring. He picked it out all by himself, I think he did a really nice job! These pictures don’t really do it justice but you get the idea.

I hadn’t even thought of looking on e-bay for the dress. I might look onto that, if I can save some money on the dress I can maybe splurge on getting it altered to be just the way I want it.

03-19-2007, 01:30 PM
shan- Your ring is pretty! That's great that he picked it out himself. It must have been an exciting suprise!

Jill- Sounds like you found a really nice one. I like that it has sapphires- that color will be lovely I'm sure.

The boy and I spent time discussing reception food last night. We both really like to have food from different cultures, so here is what we are talking about:

It will be a buffet-style meal, with three different areas to choose food from. One station will be indian- (which we both love! and a lot of our family has never even tried) Another station will be a local Italian shop which has cool sandwiches, and has sentimental value for us. The third we are thinking will be greek- so people can make their own gyros. It sounds sort of expensive, but we were getting quotes from people, and it sounds like it will be the same price or a little less than going out to some fancy restaurant and paying for a meal. Plus, this is so much more US. I'm really excited about it, I hope we can make it work.

BFL- we are thinking about doing the individual table cakes as well. I saw that in a magazine and got excited about the idea. I like the idea that people could choose a table based on what kind of cake they like, or that they could barter with other tables or something. :)

03-19-2007, 06:36 PM
So, I'm having a little bit of a struggle with the wedding planning/eating conundrum. It seems like I am eating out SO MUCH MORE as these final weeks are coming up. This weekend - Saturday we met with our friends to talk about flowers for their wedding, not ours, over dinner - one meal out. Tonight we're meeting with our hairstylist/friend over dinner to discuss our wedding hair - another meal out. Shower - tons of food. My sister's shower - again with tons of food. Rehearsal dinner - tons of food. Continuing onward up until the weddding.

90% of my weight loss success has been due to me cooking at home, grocery shopping, and planning. The other 10% of the equation has been exercising...and my regular gym time falls right during the standard "social" I've had to sneak in half-workouts wherever I can. So how are the other brides out there dealing with this? I know - make good choices at restaurants, watch portions, etc, and thats all well and good, but its starting to slow my losses down and make me unhappy with the scale in the morning.


03-19-2007, 08:45 PM
Hey neat, I just found this thread :) Always more than happy to chat wedding!

DF and I have been engaged for a year and 8ish months. We're getting married June 30th (which is almost exactly 100 days away--eek!).

I'm glad to see that for the most part you ladies like things pretty simple... The average cost of a wedding nowadays is apparently around $22k, which I can't even imagine! Sheesh! Anyway, it makes me feel like less of an oddball to be planning something pretty low-key.

We're having about 50 people, although if it were up to DF's mother, we'd have half of Brazil up here in no time. (He's from Brazil originally... read Catholic... read family-centric... read fond of giant weddings!)

Here's what I have so far:

My dress. It's actually a bridesmaid's dress! I didn't want a train anyway... It's a little dramatic for my taste... So this was the perfect compromise. It was very affordable and it is also very beautiful.
Here's a link to the dress:
Be sure to check out the back of it, too. That's my favorite part :) Have to find undergarments, though, that go low enough for that back... There's a problem to be solved. It's shown in white and claret, mine is in ivory and claret. Subtle difference, but I'm pale enough to begin with and don't need pure white against me!

My locale: We're having a lunch reception and the ceremony on the site of a bed and breakfast in northern VA:
It's surprisingly not incredibly expensive, and it's so beautiful! Also, the general manager is just about the nicest guy I've ever worked with, it makes the deal even better. I haven't figured out what to do with the evening yet. We don't want to dance, but we want to get everyone together once I'm out of the dress.... Maybe we'll take over my dad's farm and have a bbq :)

The cake is made by the b&b, and one of the owners of the b&b also owns a flower shop in Crystal City and therefore claims all the wedding flower business from weddings at the b&b. So those two things are set. We're getting one arrangement for the mantle in the dining room, then some kind of bouquets for me and my girls. Have no idea about colors or kinds of flowers!

I got a photographer off craigslist, actually.... A middle-aged married couple who want to get into wedding photography seriously. They've done a few, mostly family weddings, but they do very nice work. For two people they're only asking $500! :) I guess they see this as building up their portfolio... And when they're more established they can ask an arm and a leg like everyone else. They are very friendly and I'm incredibly happy to have found them.

I think the main thing I'm missing is someone to actually marry us!! We're having a civil ceremony. We might use the same guy my dad and stepmother married with.... It would be neat. But for some reason having a person actually perform the ceremony has taken a backseat to silly things like dresses!

Ooh, have to talk about rings too! In January I finally found my perfect wedding band. It's still with DF for fear that I will start wearing it right away :p The engagement ring he gave me is estate jewelry from the 1940's and was very difficult to match in style with a wedding band. There is one central diamond and six smaller flanking diamonds, three on each side. The trick is, they're bead-set. So of course I want the diamonds on the wedding band to match... Nowadays most diamonds are either claw-set or channel-set in the ring, both of which look silly sitting next to my engagement ring. But such are the modern tastes. After going to MANY different stores and being told over and over again I'd have to get my ring custom made (for more $$), I finally found this little tiny independent shop. The owner designs and creates his own jewelry... And there it was! He had made an engagement/wedding set which had a bead-set wedding band, and he let us just get the band. So that's that story. I can't wait to wear it :p

Somehow talking about my wedding makes me feel like I'm more prepared than I actually am! I keep thinking I ought to be worried/stressed out about it because people expect me to be... But I think I have a lot under control... Along with juggling a job and grad school and immigration applications for DF, I think I've done pretty well!!

03-19-2007, 08:59 PM
David's bridal has an undergarment with a low enough back - its the one I'm wearing with my dress (and I think the backs are similarly low). I just googled "low back bridal bustier" and found several. Just make sure whatever you buy is marked as "low back".

03-19-2007, 09:05 PM
Your plans sound GORGEOUS...and that dress is amazing! My cousin is wearing a very similar one for her wedding in June.

We did a very similar thing with our photographer - only he had just moved to San Francisco, and was looking for gay weddings for his portfolio. 20% discount off his standard rates to be his token gay couple...he is a sweetie.

Do you have someone very special in your lives who could officiate? They can become an ordained minister online at, giving them the legal permission to officiate your ceremony. Sometimes, the perfect person to officiate isn't an official at all - its someone more close to home.

I think our wedding is probably the most "formal/traditional" of what is being planned in this thread, and we did that on purpose. Our thinking is that having the traditional wedding format would make people more comfortable with the untraditional wedding...and this is indeed the feedback we are getting from our more traditional guests. Gives them an idea of what to expect since the ceremony itself is going to be a new sort of thing.

03-19-2007, 09:27 PM
Jaime, that location looks gorgeous! I know the area, too--my fiance's (wow, I think that's the first time I wrote "fiance") mother lives out in Madison, so we drive through Warrenton to get there. Definitely a nice scenic area.

03-20-2007, 01:04 AM
So, on the tulips, Sarah says a few things are important...

1. Season. Tulips that didn't have to be flown in from Holland because they are out of season here will be fresher, and therefore less likely to give out mid-reception. Spring is tulip season, as well as a brief period in the fall.

2. Freshness. She says if your florist got them in fresh, it shouldn't be much of an issue - make sure they aren't ordering the flowers for your wedding to arrive a week before, and make sure they stay in water as long as possible (they only start to go limp / open when they start to get dehydated).

3. Have your florist deliver your flowers only a little bit before the wedding - they can keep them in water/refrigeration a lot longer if they are delivering right before. If they delivered them the night before or you picked them up, they'd have a better chance of wilting.

4. If you're worried about the stems getting limp, you can explore wiring/taping of the stems - this will keep them in exactly the shape you want them, held with a wire, which reinforces the head of the flower so that when they do dehydrate and get limp, they'll still stay right where you wanted them. This won't help with the flowers opening, but will help with stem bending.

Hope that helps!

03-20-2007, 10:50 AM
Thanks for the info re: the undergarment thingie (is it really called a bustier? I don't need to be any bustier! :lol:), mandalinn. I was worried that I'd have trouble finding something low enough, but it sounds like it's common enough. I have to plan a trip up to DC sometime soon, not only to drop in on the flower people, but also because the nearest David's Bridal is all the way up there!

BTW, mandalinn, your dress is beautiful! I love the skirt of it. You look amazing!

I'm not sure who I would get to officiate if we did have someone get certified to do so... My stepmother has brought it up before but having her do it would upset the family political balance and remember, I'm trying to keep things low-stress! Ah well. It's a good idea, though. My aunt is a judge and we were going to have her do it, but turns out she can't even come. :(

Jill: yeah, I just love the area. Washington is about another 30-40 minutes west of Warrenton, and it only gets prettier the further out west you go! I really love Virginia... Oh, and congrats on getting engaged!! That's awesome :)

Christine: Your buffet is a neat idea! I've never heard of someone doing it like that, but I can't imagine it would be much more difficult or expensive than working with a caterer.

03-20-2007, 10:59 AM
madalinn - Thanks for the tulip info! Our wedding is in the spring so that should be perfect for tulips. I have a friend that has offered to do the arrangements, so I’m going to see if I can get the florist that’s doing my friends wedding this fall to let me just order stems from them. We’re having a Sunday ceremony, so I imagine we’d pick up the flowers and arrange them on Saturday and we could keep them in water in the refrigerator overnight. Wiring the stems is a really good idea.

Britomart – I love your dress! The setting of that B & B looks lovely too.

We’ll be putting our deposit down for the ceremony site next week. Very exciting!

03-20-2007, 11:37 AM
Britomart - your ring sounds great - any chance you could share a photo of this with us? I'm a jewelry-aholic, so I'd love to see it. Especially because it's an estate piece.

03-20-2007, 01:45 PM
My sister also has bead-set diamonds in her antique-style ring. I think she found her band on Ebay, but she had a seriously hard time matching as well.

03-20-2007, 01:58 PM
Alright, Jeff and I have searched through literally thousands of rings online, and we can't find a picture of the one I want! So frsutrating...

We went to 2 Jared locations last night (we originally saw the ring at a Jared in Va Beach over the weekend while visiting my sister), but neither of them had it in stock. They did have it at a nearby Kay, but they wouldn't let me take a picture of it (which I don't understand, since most of their rings are online, and the sales guy even grabbed a flyer because he thought there was a picture of it in there--I KNOW a picture in a flyer would be much better than any picture Icould take in a store, so I don't understand why they wouldn't let me take a picture, but anyway...).

Looking through so many rings online, I started to second guess myself--maybe I want one with more this or less that, etc. But as soon as I saw it again at the store, I knew I wanted it. Now it's just a matter of finding the best price and the best diamond for the setting...

03-20-2007, 05:33 PM
Here's a photo of my engagement ring. I have a pretty old digital camera which doesn't allow for good focus close-up... So this is the best I can do!

(Don't know why the image is not inserting itself instead of linking even with img tags around it... Oh well. It works either way.)

Jill, no one would let me take a photo of a ring I liked either. I understood why when we were at the little places, but at the big places like Zales that advertise their rings anyway? I don't understand! Ah well.

03-20-2007, 09:51 PM
oooh, pretty rings. So fun to look at. :) I am so in the dark about what the boy is going to do. We have gone shopping tons, but when it comes to actually getting the ring, he wants to do it without me. He has also said, "it will be better than any of the ones we have seen," which to me means that he will not buy me any of the ones we have seen together. Is he designing a ring? My other thought is that he may have a family ring up his sleeve. I am going crazy waiting, though...

Mandalinn- You brought up all the eating out that seems to surround weddings. I cannot really offer advice, but I can say that I can relate. I currently commute more than an hour each way about 4 times a week. Micah and I are narrowing down where he will be going to school next year, which means we are traveling to visit schools and communities. I feel like I'm constantly out, either with shopping or parties for his family or whatever. I definitely make excuses for myself. At this point, I am losing very very slowly, and I feel almost like I should just be grateful for anything I am getting, because my effort has been moderate at best as of late.

On the planning front- I am wondering what to do about reception table decorations. We have talked about only using individual cakes as centerpieces.

Here is the problem I am running into. I don't want all the tables to look the same, and I don't want them to look too formal. I want to coordinate without being matchy-matchy, make sense? My initial thought on how to do this was to scour garage sales for various pink tablecloths, then have each table have its own, different tablecloth. We have also talked about doing something similar, but instead looking for interesting glass and ceramic pink pieces. Then each table could have its own little grouping of pieces. Or both?

I like these ideas, but I really don't want it to look too strange and hodgepodge. Any ideas about how to strike a balance of these ideas? Are they all crazy? hehe, any feedback would be great.

03-20-2007, 10:06 PM
I love the idea of using different tablecloths for each table. You could also (we debated doing this) name each table (rather than numbering) and incorporate the name into the centerpieces. So for our wedding, we debated naming each table after a flower (again, sarah = florist = flower/spring theme wedding) and incorporating that flower into the centerpiece for that table. Ultimately it got too complicated. But you could name each table, for example, after a city you've lived in (incorporate maps in the centerpiece), a special person in your lives (decorating with photos makes tables look unique), etc.

Since you're doing individual cakes, could you find a really interesting topper per table? photos, maps, movie tickets, other items you've found at places that are important to you - this would make all of the cakes slightly unique, and reflect the two of you as a couple.

03-22-2007, 01:25 AM
I did not enjoy looking at rings at ALL. I think it was because i had no clue about anything about rings, except for what I didn't like. My fiance knows how picky i can be about stuff, so he proposed to me with earrings (he's so cute). We went to every jewerly store around the Maryland/Virginia area. From Costco to Tiffany's to Zales. After a while all the rings looked the same to me. Thank goodness my aunt knows an owner of a jewerly store in Chevy Chase, MD, or else I'll still be looking.
I don't know how to get a picture on here, but its round cut center, with two smaller stones on either side on a platinum band. i love it.

The only thing i know for sure about wedding dresses, is that i DO NOT want one with big poofy skirts. siiigh....i can go on about what i don't want at my wedding, but i don't know what i DO want.

I think we're going to have our reception at a Chinese restaurant, the menu's are usually set and there are 10 courses. The only think i'm really looking forward to planning is my cake. I want it to be INSANE, those folks at Charm City Cakes can do just about anything.

At times i think i want to elope...sooo much easier.

03-22-2007, 07:20 AM
nickname, you sound EXACTLY like me :dizzy: I don't know anything about rings or diamonds or whatever either. I really lucked out in that I just spotted something one day that jumped out at me and screamed my name, you know? We've been to a bunch of jewelry stores, and I would always walk out thinking they all just kinda looked the same--shiny metal band, big sparkly diamond. That's not what I wanted--I need something more me. In every store we went in, the first thing the salesperson would ask is what kinds of things I liked, and I had a list of the things I did NOT like (solitaires, anything pressure set, anything yellow gold...), but the list of things I DID like was practically non-existant :p

Same with wedding plans--I don't want to have dancing at my reception, I don't want to have a big church ceremony, I don't want it to be too formal, etc...but what DO I want?? :dizzy:

03-22-2007, 11:53 AM

Did you happen to go to Charleston Alexander? Their MD location is in Chevy Chase (or is it Bethesda? I get confused). One thing I was fascinated by was that they had a computer that could analyze a diamond for you, it was pretty cool. They also had all sorts of diamonds, even from Canada. They even said that they'd set a created diamond if we wanted. (and said many of their customers actually ask for that)

Picking out the ring is daunting, I was overwhelmed at first as well.

Since you are in the area, I'd also recommend Clyde's in Chevy Chase for any occassion but we went there for the pre wedding dinner. It was nice. Gotta love green plush seating!

03-22-2007, 12:56 PM
I love the idea of the different tablecloths as well! How many tables do you think you'll have?

One thing I toyed with, with the individual cake thing, was having a different cake plate on each table. But, since I"m doing a fall theme, I wasn't sure that I'd find plates different enough to incorporate into the theme. But, with just pink as a criteria, you could do white ones, clear ones, ... for each table.

Another cake/centerpiece idea for you all is cupcakes. WM has white 13-cupcake cupcake trees, which I was going to put onto a fabric-covered riser on each table. Cupcakes tend to run about $1.50-$2 apiece, so this can be a very cost effective way to go. The stands are about $7 each. I still like the idea, but DF wanted cakes instead, so we'll have cakes.

I'm going to try to insert a photo of my ring. Mine is yellow gold on the sides, and is hand-engraved with a scroll design. I really wanted something that looked antique, and this turned out to be a good compromise for me. The diamond is a round cut, but the prongs on the antique head makes it look like a princess. Still working on trying to find a band to go-with. It's my goal to have to have this resized 1/2 size down by the wedding - I hated buying it this size! The good news is that it was tight when I first got it, and now it's almost loose!

03-22-2007, 01:28 PM
I think cupcakes are so adorable. Seriously, you all have such great ideas! I can't wait to see pictures from everyone when the big day arrives!

We officially passed our "pity point" on responses. See, our site holds 100 people...we knew the space would feel sort of empty if we didn't hit at least 50 attendees (wouldn't have been a problem with a smaller space, but we loved the space soooo much...). So we were freaking out that with our 85 invitees, we wouldn't hit that 50 mark - we are at 55! So that was a big moment.

This weekend we have a TON of honeymoon shopping to do. Its a lot of money to drop, even on relatively inexpensive things (we are going to work the Target)...we literally have -no- summer clothes or evening casual clothes in our sizes. Its a 10 day cruise (with coin laundry, sure, but who wants to do laundry on their honeymoon??!?!), which will require soooo much clothing (for each of us: 2 formal dresses for the formal dinners, 8 evening casual outfits, at least 4 sets of gym wear, 10 day wear outfits (jeans, t-shirts, capri pants, tank tops, etc, swimsuit, sunglasses, etc, plus sweaters or sweatshirts if it gets cold). Being that we are starting from nothing, there is a LOT of shopping to do. I bought formal dresses on ebay (for like 10 dollars per, thank goodness, because $100 per dress would be too much for both of us to spend on 2 dresses each), swimsuits on clearance, but there is still soooo much to buy. The credit cards are getting a workout this weekend. Hopefully my size is close to stable now, though, so I can use these clothes through the entire summer.

03-22-2007, 02:14 PM
Can I join the party? I'm getting married July 28. Yesterday I finally got around to ordering my bridesmaid dresses (actually tops and then separate skirts) from and hopefully they will come in June. One top is white with a burgundy trim and a black skirt, and the other two are solid burgundy tops with black skirts because our colors are burgundy, black, and white. For the white/burgundy top, we're doing a burgundy colored shawl and for the burgundy top, it will be white shawls. This is because all my bridesmaids are self conscious about their arms and so I told them they could wear shawls if they want to. Our bridal shower is April 21. Is it appropriate to send out invitations with information about where we are registered with the bridal shower invites? Because most of the people I don't know and never talk to (his mom's inviting friends) and I want to make sure everyone knows where we're registered at. My dress is being handmade by my dad. It is the wedding dress from the movie The Princess Diaries 2. I found the pattern and now just need to get the material. The skirt is a sparkly burgundy color, the top is white and it will have black lace over that. My shoes are silver with rhinestones. Anyways, any advice is welcome!

03-22-2007, 02:23 PM
Your shower is on my wedding day! Welcome!

I would probably not send registry information out with the invites to the shower, but would instruct the people who are taking RSVPs for the shower to give out the registry information when people call to RSVP. Everyone is going to have to RSVP anyway, so the info should get to everyone.

Your colors and dresses sound so pretty!!

03-22-2007, 02:47 PM

You have less than a month to go! I wish you the best of luck. I know I was a bit stressed about a month before my wedding. Once you get to the day though it is smooth sailing. Actually our initial wedding dates are coming up. We had planned to get married at the end of April or early May but then DH wanted to accelerate the plans so we did. I'm actually pretty glad it was quick between engagement and the wedding, just because it was a lot less time to stress and think about the entire wedding. Especially now that I'm in the process of writing a 60 page paper for my last class in my Masters program.

I really enjoy reading your guys stories and such.

I also remembered something today. When I was looking for invitations to my wedding, I got frustrated because they were so expensive and I was having a small wedding and didn't want to spend tons of money on just invitations. I borrowed a laser printer from my inlaws and bought blank invitations at Walmart. It cost me $19.99. I had also thought of various things like using postcards for response cards and such.

It is amazing how little things can stress you sometimes too.

03-22-2007, 09:26 PM
How many calories does panicking about the seating plan burn? How about 5 hours assembling lucky bamboo plants for favors?

03-23-2007, 02:51 AM
Jilly Bean 720

hahahahaha...i said the exact same thing, when i was looking at the rings. Everytime someone asked me what I liked, i told them what i DIDN'T like, and your list sounds like mine, no yellow gold, no solitaire ( i thought the stone looked lonely, I'm insane I know), no marquis cut, no princess cut.... I'm with you with the not too formal wedding, if people want to come in jeans, fine whatever, if they want to wear a ball gown, fine whatever. AND i don't want a church wedding, but i feel that greatly limits my options...
I have no clue what I'm doing. However, there is a doughnut place (VooDoo Doughnuts) in Portland, Ore. that will marry you for $175, and they provide coffee and doughnuts for up to 10 people. It's sounding better and better everyday.


I went to Boone and Sons. Though that computer thing sounds like fun, but I'm so bad with technology I'm liable to break it.

Have fun shopping for the honeymoon Mandalinn!
I heard that the most expensive thing in a reception is an open bar. Is that true?

03-23-2007, 05:34 AM
Angel--do you guys have a wedding website? My sister's invitations and the ones for a wedding coming up in May (well, the shower invitations for their weddings) just included a link to their website on the invite, and their registry info was on their site. That way, it's more like you're just showing off your wedding site and those registries just happen to be there ;)

mandalin--ooh, bamboo plants..excellent favors! I love bamboo. If we do favors, I may have to steal that idea ;)

nickname--I don't think not having a big church wedding limits you at all. Quite the opposite--you have the freedom to have the ceremony ANYWHERE! Indoors, outdoors, gazebo, garden, pavillion, tent, zoo, arcade--where ever a JOP can stand with you, you can have the ceremony! I'm not having a church wedding, either. I won't get into my personal religious views here, but I will say that I've seen others go through the process of joining a church JUST to get married there, and then never go again, and I am absolutely against that.
As for reception costs, I don't think the open bar was the most expensive aspect for my sister's wedding last spring. I suppose it really depends on the number of guests, the types of alcohol you decide to serve, and how formal/expensive the other aspects of your reception are. My sister paid an arm and a leg for the photographer they wanted--definitely the single most expensive piece of their pie :dizzy:

nelie--I'm pretty sure we'll be printing our own invitations. We have a color printer, and we know how to get to Staples :p I do a little designing for work (designing graphics for documents, layouts, formatting, proposal covers, etc.), and Jeff does some creative drawing on the computer (his latest thing is to make "scary" looking creatures--I have an email folder at work of things he's sent me that includes goblins, evil clowns, sea creatures, etc.), so I'm sure we can come up with something that is completely unique and incorporates some true "us."

Still working on my ring...Jeff is going to call his friend's jeweler today to see if he is working at all over the weekend. The place he works is in Rockville, MD, so not exactly close enough for us to just stop by without knowing for sure if he will be there (we live in Alexandria, VA--in some areas, that wouldn't be a big distance, but as some of you know, with the traffic around here...:devil: ).

03-23-2007, 12:30 PM
Jilly - we found glass pots for them at Wal-Mart, as well as little river stones to fill the pots with. This lucky bamboo supplier is MEGA cheap -

We are doing one straight stalk inside a spiral stalk. I love these things, and they are coming out to about $3 per person, which is totally in the right range for a favor.

03-25-2007, 10:52 AM
Good morning gals. Now I'm really thinking about the table cloth idea - not necessarily different ones, but maybe something like a table topper to dress up the plain white that my reception place has. I'm thinking of maybe something I could make or buy dirt cheap - but it would be nice to do a sheer fabric with some sort of fall leaf motif on it. Yes, I know I'm dreaming.... LOL

Last night we went to a banquet so I got a chance to sit at an 8-seat round table - much bigger than I remembered. Each of these toppers would end up being pretty big - maybe a 70" square would work? I really need to find out the actual table dimensions before I really think about trying to do this.

03-25-2007, 11:49 AM
bfl cat, can you just call the reception site and ask them the table size? Maybe instead of trying to find the perfect sheer fabric, you could find fall-colored solid fabrics to overlay on the white and then just do cut-outs of fall leaves to scatter on the table tops? I used to work in a fabric store, so I know patterned sheers are much more expensive than solid fabrics, plus they tend to typically come in 60-inch lengths, so you would have to have a seam across the middle to make them big enough, whereas other types of material are easier to find in 60-inch widths. 60 may still not be as big as you want, but if you're using a square pieces, I think it might look neat to not have it cover the entire surface and allow some of the round white parts to be seen on the edges (if you can picture a white cirle with a colored square overlapping). Another suggestion I would have for really wide fabric is to find some cheap fabric shower curtains and just cut and hem the end with the shower ring holes. Just kind of thinking as I go here, so fel free to ignore me ;)

Well, Jeff and I went to see his friend's jeweler yesterday, and we described the ring I like. He said they would be able to custom make it for me, but it might not be 100% exactly the same, and it wouldn't be much less expensive, so we went ahead and ordered the band from Jared and will just get the center diamond from this jeweler. They explained (and showed us lots of examples) that even though we may get the same carat size diamond for the same price at both the jeweler and at Jared, the jeweler would be able to give us a higher quality stone for the same price. It did make us feel better to hear a jeweler tell us that the price of the band at Jared was actually a good price, so even if we're not getting it any cheaper, we have a little more peace of mind in spending the money. And so, we ordered the band from Jared yesterday, and they said it would be in in 9 days. Can't wait!!! :D Oh, and the service plan at Jared (which is only like 85 bucks) covers the band forever. They will tighten any loose stones, re-dip it whenever necessary (since white gold can become brassy over time), repair the prongs if needed, and do any resizing as long as I have the ring. I am LOVIN' that plan! They will also cover any damaged or fallen out stones for the life of the ring, which is a relief since I even tried the style on at Kay, and one of the small channel-set diamonds on the band was missing :dizzy: The only "catch" is that I have to bring the ring in to Jared (any location) every 6 months--that way, they can tighten settings to avoid losing stones rather than have me call up every few years about a lost stone. I can handle going in twice a year to protect our investment :)

03-25-2007, 09:06 PM
Jill -- that's an awesome service plan deal! It's kind of like car maintenance... gotta change the oil every 3000 miles ;) You've talked so much about this ring, you better post a photo when it's finished!!

I tried on my wedding dress really for the first time since I got it today. I've had it since the fall, as I ordered it in June of LAST year (we were originally having a fall wedding... long story)... when I weighed less! So what was big on me then fits perfectly right now. Not that that's a good thing. I was planning on having to have it taken in. Now that I have a clear image of what I look like in the dress, I'll have to make it help me get a few pounds off before the wedding. 10 would help me feel a LOT more comfortable in that thing (especially if those 10 come off my back!).

It is a beautiful dress, though! I couldn't be happier with my choice.

03-26-2007, 07:20 AM
Jill -- You've talked so much about this ring, you better post a photo when it's finished!!
ha, I talk about it because it's the ONLY wedding-ish thing I am actually certain about :p Other then my engagement ring, we don't know where, when, or how we want to get marries--we don't know how many guests, we don't know what type of ceremony, we don't know what season, we don't know indoor or outdoor, we don't know local or destination...and so, I can only talk about the ring :dizzy:

But speakig of posting photos, you'd better post some of your gown! Even if you may have gained a bit back since you last tried on the dress, at least it still fits so you don't have to stress yourself out about having to lose weight or not be able to fit into the dress at all! I have seen some crazy brides order their dresses a size or 2 smaller with the intent of losing weight and, of course, they never lose quite enough (and who could lose much weight right before a wedding with all the planning and running around and stress...?) :dizzy:

03-26-2007, 11:42 AM
Hey guys I stumbled across your site and I too am a bride to be looking to lose weight before the big day. I have a lot to lose but a lot of time so I guess that is good. Our date is July 5, 2008 and actually the wedding stuff is pretty much done we just have to come up with a way to pay for it! Hopefully I can convince my fiance to cut back on the guest list a bit! As all i do is worry about the cost. I look foward to sharing this journey with you guys. Stephanie

03-26-2007, 11:59 AM
looking4better--welcome! I see you're in NOVA--me too! Lord knows that in this area, you pretty much HAVE to be worried about the cost or it will very quickly and easily go out of control :dizzy: Can you share some of your big day details with us? I love hearing everyone else's plans (so I can steal some of them when we're ready to start making firm plans ;) )!

OH, and bfl cat, another suggestion for wide fabric that wouldn't require a seam down the middle--queen/king size bedsheets. We've frequently bought sheets to make window curtains because they can be much cheaper than buying the equivalent amount of yardage of bolt fabric.

03-26-2007, 12:57 PM
Looking4better....welcome! Not a ton of time at the moment, but wanted to say great that you have so much of your planning done.

Jilly - its ridiculous trying to lose weight with all of the planning. The parties...the many, many parties...are murder, and all of the days out running errands...not to mention the tastings and etc. Its insane.

Yes, sheets! You can often get them for cheap at places like Also, look for fabric wholesalers - lots of them sell big wide bolts.

Finally, it might add a bit of expense, but where we are you can rent "overlays" for your tables from a party rental company. Locally, they do have the autumn/leaf motif overlays, and I think renting them costs something along the lines of 8-10 dollars per table. Now, thats a lot when you consider that are only RENTING, and won't end up with them afterward...but honestly, do you have use for that many huge tablecloths post-wedding anyway?

03-26-2007, 01:02 PM
So the whole wedding thing has been kinda of funny as he is very traditional and I am not. But we have come to some agreements.
The first compromise was the ring. I didn't want a diamond ring per se. I do not wear a lot of jewelry so if I am going to wear a ring I wanted it to be different. So I got a pink sapphire ring that has diamonds down the sides of the band and then the wedding ban will also have diamonds.

As for the ceremony, we are going to have it in his church but no communion and shortened down on the bible readings. His friends will do 2 bible versus and mine will read 2 poems. And the whole thing has to be shorter than 45 mins- (I'm aiming for 30 mins)because I hate long weddings! They are soooo boring! I wanted a fall wedding so that I could have dark rich colors, but he coaches football so fall doesn't work so well. So we decided to go with an evening wedding. My colors are wine and silver.

As for the reception we decided on the newly remodeled VFW hall. We were going to have it at quantico marine base-but dates wouldn't work. but the vfw does the catering and prices are good so I can't complain. As for favors we ordered shot glasses that on one side read "take a shot we tied the knot" and on the other side have our names and wedding date- We are debating as to use these for the toast or just put candy in them and put them on the tables. We're still thinking about something else small to give as well.

Because our wedding is a holiday weekend we decided we are going to send out Save the Date cards, but instead of cards we ordered magnets that have our picture on them with the message- they are really cute!

Actually for as far away as the wedding is I have a lot lined up already. We have the place/catering, the DJ, the wedding singer/organist, and the photographer all arranged. As for my dress I sent a picture of one that I really liked with my measurements to this man in china- a little bit of a risk but if it turns out it will be a huge reward! and I guess if i hate it i will find something around here.

We still have to do all the fine tune planning- flowers, actual guest lists, cake but we are well on our way.

03-26-2007, 08:10 PM
I traveled to North Carolina this weekend with Micah to check out UNC's computer graphics grad program. The school looks great, so we may end up there. It's very exciting but also overwhelming! The area is really pretty, but more expensive than Indiana. (Not surprising- Indiana may be about as cheap as it gets.)

So, on top of wedding stuff, I'm thinking house stuff and trying to find a job. Ack! I'm going crazy!

I am really excited because the dress I want for my bridesmaids is on sale. I don't think I've posted it yet:

I also found a 30% off code, so I think they will ship for $35 each. I am THRILLED with this. I have put out so much money for bridesmaid dresses before, so that price is great. Plus, I can afford to buy the dress for any girls for whom money may be an issue.

The dress is a lot more casual than many of the dresses being advertised now, and that is fine by me. I want more of a casual feel anyway, and I think they're cute. Plus, I like the fact that they're not strapless. Oh- We will order them in pink.

All for now, take care gals.

03-28-2007, 12:04 PM
How many calories does panicking about the seating plan burn? How about 5 hours assembling lucky bamboo plants for favors?

boy I don't envy you-that's why i decided they can sit where ever they want!:D

03-28-2007, 12:47 PM
Woohoo! My ring setting came in early--we picked it up at Jared last night :D We'll go get a diamond from our jeweler on Saturday, and then it will finally be a complete piece :dizzy: I do have to take it back in to Jared today, though, because it looks like one of the prongs for the micro-set diamonds on the band is missing. They cover both the metal and the stones for life, so even if it is broken and a diamond falls out, they will repair/replace it, but I'd rather get it fixed before it gets to that point. It's not a noticable thing at all--you REALLY have to look hard to notice anything is missing--but I WAS looking hard because I'd tried on the same setting at Kay, and one of the side diamonds was missing, so I was super-checking everything over.

03-28-2007, 01:12 PM
Cute bridesmaid dresses! I'm sure your maids will love not only that they are affordable, but that they are infinitely wearable after the wedding.

Yes, you'd say that you'll just let everyone sit whereever...until you realize that you have both work friends and your friend who tends toward being very sexually suggestive in the crowd...not to mention all kinds of people who refuse to sit near all kinds of other people...not to mention lots of uncomfortable family who'll need someone familiar nearby. Basically we assigned tables to create "buffer zones" - buffer zones from the very catholic family with my boss who starts spouting off controversial religious viewpoints when he has been drinking, buffer zones from our friend who hit on Sarah's stepdad before he knew he was Sarah's step dad...buffer zones buffer zones buffer zones.

03-28-2007, 02:19 PM
lol I guess I am lucky..all my family is in Michigan and canada so only immediate family is invited to come down to the wedding. Then a seperate party will be held at my grandma's house for everyone that couldn't make it. So Ben would have to worry more about buffer zones and I don't think he cares

03-28-2007, 03:35 PM
Just zipping through ladies, back from my mini vacation in LA and lots of work to get done here! Our annual gathering (dubbed “nonukkah”) was especially joyous this year as three engaged couples were in attendance. Must be something in the water. ;)

Welcome new people, look forward to hearing about all your plans!

My df’s father hosted a lovely poolside engagement party for us and our friends on Sunday. Our close friends who are also engaged gave us a couple of books that are really interesting and useful, The Knot Complete Guide to Weddings in the Real World (from the same people at and the New Jewish Wedding Can’t wait till this work event is over on Sunday and I can start devoting a little time to seriously planning my own event!

03-30-2007, 01:43 PM
The wheels in my head have been turning...Jeff and I are beginning a list of possible wedding locations (well, more like I am beginning a list and am mentioning places to him as I go along ;) ). We both love penguins, and the New England Aquarium in Boston has 3 different penguin species, so that's at the top of my list right now. I love some of the venues available at the Sea World in San Antonio, but I think Boston would be better and less expensive travel-wise for us. Also, I have a TON of familly in Connecticut (where I grew up), so they would actually possibly be able to go if we did the deed in Boston. Sea World is still on my radar--it would just be a smaller group.

Then there's the idea of a hot air balloon. It seemed a little cheesy to me at first, but Jeff thought it sounded fun, and I agree. Plus, we really wouldn't have to worry much about what we're wearing since there wouldn't be much of an audience for the ceremony.

I was thinking about the National Zoo in DC, but I'm not sure I'd want to have an event at such a smelly place :p I love animals, and we live 10 minutes from DC, but being at a zoo, I don't think I'd want to wear much of a fancy dress :dizzy:

I'm also going to look into places like Jillian's and Dave and Busters (never been there, but I hear it's similar to Jillian's).

Oh, and I get to ge get the diamond for my engagement ring tomorrow, and I will pick up my perfectly sized setting today, so I should finally have a complete engagement ring by Sunday :D

03-30-2007, 02:47 PM
The wheels in my head have been turning...Jeff and I are beginning a list of possible wedding locations (well, more like I am beginning a list and am mentioning places to him as I go along ;) ). We both love penguins, and the New England Aquarium in Boston has 3 different penguin species, so that's at the top of my list right now. I love some of the venues available at the Sea World in San Antonio, but I think Boston would be better and less expensive travel-wise for us. Also, I have a TON of familly in Connecticut (where I grew up), so they would actually possibly be able to go if we did the deed in Boston. Sea World is still on my radar--it would just be a smaller group.


I love penguins too! I didn't know about the aquarium in boston. DH and I plan to go to NJ to visit their aquarium sometime soon because they have penguins.

I also want to see them in the wild, particularly in Patagonia (either Argentina or Chile) and New Zealand.

03-30-2007, 03:03 PM
DH and I plan to go to NJ to visit their aquarium sometime soon because they have penguins.
The one in Camden, right across the bridge from Philadelphia? Been there! They do have a good penguin exhibit--they have the cute little African penguins. That's actually where my avatar photo was taken--it's small and blurry, so you can't really tell, but I was standing in front of the penguin exhibit in that photo.

I want to see them in the wild, too--there's an island in southern Australia where the penguins apparently walk along the beach each evening. I don't remember what it's called--I'll have to see if I can find it again.

Edit to add: Found it! Phillip Island, Victoria.

03-30-2007, 03:05 PM
The one in Camden, right across the bridge from Philadelphia? Been there! They do have a good penguin exhibit--they have the cute little African penguins. That's actually where my avatar photo was taken--it's small and blurry, so you can't really tell, but I was standing in front of the penguin exhibit in that photo.

I want to see them in the wild, too--there's an island in southern Australia where the penguins apparently walk along the beach each evening. I don't remember what it's called--I'll have to see if I can find it again.

Edit to add: Found it! Phillip Island, Victoria.

There is a city in New Zealand that has a penguin crossing sign on the roads! That is a place I need to be. Here is their website:

03-30-2007, 03:18 PM
Such neat, unique location selections! Gosh, how much fun would a wedding at a zoo be? Our location is pretty, but not really unique - ah well. We loved it as soon as we stepped out of the car, which has to be a good sign, right?

People are signing up for the shuttle (affectionately named "The Booze Bus") like crazy - makes me feel better, because I want everyone to be safe and get home OK. Lots of people are even taking public transit from San fran or other nearby spots and catching the bus - makes the money we paid for it worthwhile. I am thinking of doing a little welcome video for them to play on the bus ride up - a slideshow of pictures of us with a little voiceover welcoming people, saying how glad we are that they could join us, etc. I think it'd be cute - I just have to decide if its too much work. It shouldn't be too bad - assemble pictures, put into an easy powerpoint template, write and record a script for the voiceover...I might be crazy, but it seems do-able at this point.

Our lucky bamboo is due to arrive today - my house is going to be -filled- with green plants for the next month. We also have to go buy the wine this weekend, as well as snackies and water for the folks who are staying in hotels.

Honeymoon shopping is going well...and boy, do I like the built in budget/excuse to buy new clothes! But I don't have -any- clothes that fit from last summer, when I was a sz we are literally starting from scratch. I did get some fabulous formal dresses on ebay - the "formal nights" on the cruise could have killed our budget, as formal dresses often run into the 100.00 range, but with ebay I got both dresses I needed for $50.00 including shipping. Still, we're lacking in "nice casual" clothes for the other dinners. They say to wear what you would wear to an "upscale restaurant" - and we don't have much of that, mainly because with me working at home and Sarah working at a floral shop, the clothes we've purchased as we shrunk sizes have been almost exclusively casual...jeans, sweaters, t-shirts, etc. And I -love- to shop, but buying an entire new wardrobe has been a little exhausting. We're almost all set now, but we still need to pick up some last minute stuff this weekend.

03-31-2007, 08:27 PM
mandalinn--we NEED a unique location since we don't want to have a traditional ceremony/reception at all. I don't want to have to dance at all--hoping to not even have a dance floor available--and I don't want to mess with the whole garter thing with the tossing of the bouquet and whatnot. We don't have a lot of friends our age, so 99% of the guests will just be family and older than us. Every wedding I've been to, it was like pulling teeth to get the "single ladies" onto the floor to catch the bouquet. I've even been witness to occasions where the bouquet landed on the floor and all us single ladies just stood there and stared at it like it was carrying some sort of infectious disease until one girl finally bit the bullet and picked it up :p If I still had all my friends from college and whatnot, it'd be a different story, but we all live so far apart now and have lost contact.

In other news...I got my ring! In its entirety--diamond and all! Here's a not-so-great picture, but hopefully you'll get the idea. It's white gold and has a round diamond in a 4-prong setting in the center with a square-cut (but tilted, so more like diamond-shaped) blue sapphire on each side, and 5 additional tiny round diamonds set in the band on each side beyond the sapphire. I LOVE it!

04-02-2007, 01:39 AM
Mandalinn- Glad to hear your "booze bus" is going well. I hope you don't drive yourself too hard with your introduction video, but it does sound awfully cute it you decide to do it. Sounds like it's all coming together, less than 4 weeks, wow!

Jilly- What a pretty ring! You must be thrilled to have it on your finger. You mentioned the garter and bouquet toss, and I thought I would mention what we are talking about doing. Neither of us likes those traditions, so we decided to toss them. The whole idea of me sitting on a chair and him going up my dress for a crowd just doesn't do it for me. Anyway. We are completely forgetting the garter toss. And, I read this idea somewhere, and once I heard it, knew I wanted to do it. With my bouquet (or a bouquet, the bouquet is a whole 'nother story) we are going to figure out which couple in attendance has been married the longest. Then Micah and I will present the bouquet to that couple to honor them. I thought that was so sweet.

For us- We went to a local jeweler on Friday, and talked with him about designing a ring. I'm excited! It does mean I probably won't have a ring on my finger till mid-May, though. I guess having a unique ring for the rest of my life is worth waiting a few weeks. ;)

04-02-2007, 09:01 AM
Christine, I have read about doing that with the bouquet online as well. I think it's a great idea if you've got a bit of a crowd, but I'm thinking we will end up with 50 people or less at our event. I don't think we're going to do anything with the garter/bouquet at all.
A unique ring is definitely worth the wait. That's why I picked the one I have now--sure they sell it at Kay and Jared, but we actually went to 4 different Jared stoes, and they only had it in 1 of them. I've never seen anyone else have the same one, and when we went to the jeweler where we got our diamond, he said he could custom make a ring for me, but I had fallen in love with this one. We flipped through literally over 500 pages of engagement ring settings in the books from which they order (figure at least 10 rings per page, so yeah, you do the math :dizzy: ), and we couldn't find ANY like mine. They offered to custom make it for me but said it wouldn't be much cheaper than just buying it at Jared, so that's what we did. Maybe I'd have a custom ring if I had any idea what I wanted, but I didn't, and then I fell in love with this one when I saw it. Of course, now I have no idea what to do for a wedding band, but we've got some time to ponder that :p

Alright, back to drinking lots of water and healthy eating--I've got at least a year till we tie the knot, and I want to have a much smaller figure than I do now when the time comes! I don't have a specific goal in mind--just to make some progress in the right direction ;)

04-02-2007, 12:51 PM
Your ring is beautiful :) With my bouquet, my first thought was I spent $75 on it and I'm supposed to throw it? I think not :) I think a nice brunch or dinner without dancing is really a nice way to do a smaller wedding.

04-02-2007, 02:44 PM
We have three engaged people coming to the wedding - we are debating just gifting our bouquets to the two with weddings coming up next (a cousin and a friend). They are going to be really gorgeous, but we're not going to be able to get them preserved, so we figure someone ought to enjoy them.

The intro video is done and actually pretty cute! It only took a few hours and it makes me feel a lot better...starting off people's experience with a personal touch. We are trying really hard to make the whole wedding unique and special with all of these little touches, so hopefully it all works out in the end.

We had a CRAZY wedding weekend - so much got done! This is a very good thing, because there was a LOT to do, but most of the items on the list got checked off and its looking like we are in pretty good shape. We also have the guest list finally nailed down - it looks like we have 68 guests attending. I think thats the perfect number - a big party, but not overwhelmingly huge.

The lucky bamboo got delayed, which is a bummer, but I'm sure it will get here in time. We finally nailed down the schedule for the big day, down to the last detail, and got the song list to our DJ. We also FINALLY wrote our ceremony, which we had been way behind on, so thats a major relief. Now we just have packing and some minor detail work to do (printing wedding programs, assembling the favors, packing for the honeymoon, and prepping for my sister's wedding shower, which is the weekend before our wedding). All in all we're in MUCH better shape - and better yet, we're actually right on target budget-wise, so thats good.

Jilly - what a GORGEOUS ring. Its so nice to have something unique!

04-02-2007, 02:50 PM
mandalinn, you are too funny. You from "I'm thinking of maybe doing this..." to "I finished it yesterday" in the blink of an eye :dizzy: I'm glad you're feeling good about where you stand with the big day coming up so soon and that everything is falling perfectly into place (despite the delayed bamboo, but it's lucky, right? so it will arrive on time ;) ).

04-02-2007, 04:43 PM
Once I get an idea in my head, I run with it.

I have the slideshow up on youtube if anyone wants to see it...of course, its like 10 minutes long and probably not all that interesting if you don't know us...but I thought i'd offer anyway.

I will post the link if anyone requests.

04-02-2007, 10:06 PM
Hi Mandalinn

I would love to see your video if you don't mind me watching and possibly stealing ideas. :)

So glad to hear it's all coming together.

04-02-2007, 10:11 PM
Sometimes I get a little bit over-the-top with showing people pics/videos/etc when it comes to the wedding, so wanted to make sure someone was actually interested before i posted the link - hehehe.

04-02-2007, 10:46 PM
Jill, your ring is just gorgeous - you must be thrilled to finally have it! I still catch myself looking at my diamond all the time! I really like the setting of the sapphires - very unique!

Nothing new to report here - been doing a lot of online catalog searches for bridesmaid dresses - found a couple I like at Newport News, and one at Chadwicks. If the quality is ok, these would be much more reasonably priced alternatives to something from a bridal shop. One challenge I have is that one bridesmaid, my sister, is 41, and the other, Pete's niece, is 16. It's hard to find a style and a color that will work for both.

04-03-2007, 04:41 AM
hi all,

i personally do not like the whole garter belt thing either, esp. in front of my grandparents!!!!! I think its kinda tacky, but that may be a cultural thing. Anyway, my fiance wants to have it, I told him he could wear the garter. As for throwing the bouquet, i was thinking about putting a gift certificate into some flowers and throwing that instead. Right now I'm trying to convience my fiance that having a wedding on a Friday is not illegal and that its okay have the ceremony and reception on two different days...siiigh...i have a loooong road ahead of me. Good luck to everyone else.

04-03-2007, 12:52 PM
Jill – What a gorgeous and unique ring! You must be thrilled to have it on your finger after all that searching.

madalinn – You sound like you’ve got things just about all set. That slideshow is such a fun idea, I bet your guests will love it.

That gift certificate in the bouquet is a great idea. I think I’m going to have a smaller “dummy” bouquet made for the toss. And then lob it directly at my cousin who has that whole rapidly-approaching-30-must-find-a-man-to-marry-now syndrome. I don’t get it myself, as I would have been prepared to go my whole life without getting married if I never found the right person, but I know it would make her happy to catch the bouquet.

I got myself measured for my bridesmaid dress for my friends’ (my maid of honor and my fiancée’s best man actually) wedding in the fall. Another chocolate brown dress I will probably never wear again, but oh well. It is quite cute but strapless so I really gotta start being more consistent with my lifting, must firm up my “flying squirrel” arms.

We put out deposit down on our ceremony site, so I feel like it’s really official now. Our date is May 25, 2008. I’m glad we’ve got more than a year because I think I’m going to need it!

Despite my crazy and stressed/busy state over the last couple weeks the scale is actually on the lower end of the range it’s been fluctuating in lately, so that’s good. I’ll feel better once I’m consistently weighing in the 160s again.

04-03-2007, 01:05 PM
Shan!! May 25th is my birthday :) I'll definitely be thinking of you :)

04-05-2007, 11:25 AM
Jill - Your ring is GORGEOUS. You must be so thrilled with it! I have never seen one like it, you're right. And you know, the unique shape of it would allow you to do some pretty fun things with a wedding band, if you don't mind getting it custom made..... I'm just looking at the shape and I think it would look really neat to have a wedding band that nestles up in the little triangle-shapes made by the rotated sapphires. Maybe rotated square-cut diamonds in the band so that it kind of "locks in" with your engagement ring and works as one unit? That would look really neat, I think :)

Mandalinn - wow, you are really almost there, aren't you? You've accomplished a lot! I felt like I had done well by just calling and making hair appointments for me and my bridesmaids the other day :lol: Of course, I still don't have an officiant, but eh, what does that matter? :p

re: garter toss: NOT doing it. Creepy. Don't want people watching my fiance travel up my leg under my dress like that!

re: bouquet toss: can't decide. I don't have a whole lot of single friends anymore anyway... The gift certificate idea is actually really good, though instead of hiding it inside I could toss my bouquet and then whoever catches it can give it back to me and I give them a gift certificate :) I don't really want to give away my bouquet!

I finished my gift registry yesterday.... Which was a bigger task than one might imagine. Seeing as how Leo's not here to help, and I'm generally an indecisive person, it was hard! I'm really happy with what I've selected, though. I was planning on not making a registry and just asking people to pick things out themselves, but we met with SO MUCH resistance to that idea that I broke down and registered. I guess people want to be sure that we'll like what they pick!

04-05-2007, 11:38 AM
Hey gals - britomart brings up a question I have: What are you doing for registering?

I ask because I am 43, and really don't need a lot of stuff. I've been living on my own forever, and have a fully stocked kitchen. I have a few neat items I want from William Sonoma, and I need silverware, but beyond that I'm stuck.

Do you gals have any suggestions for me? I wouldn't worry so much if it were just the wedding, but I am having a shower, and typically people don't give $$ for a shower.

04-05-2007, 01:24 PM
Cindy - you can register for just about anything these days. Major stores have like Target, which carry just about anything you want, have registries where you can add all kinds of things. Also, you can set up a honeymoon registry through several travel sites - pick your location and things you'd like to do, and guests can buy you each experience. You'd register for things like "sea kayaking and snorkel trip" and someone would pay the website the amount that thing cost - your vacation experience would then be pre-paid!

We also had much of our stuff, but we're still pretty young and a lot of it was hand-me-down or cheap college purchases, so we are mostly upgrading our equipment and then having a garage sale to sell the older items. We also registered for some furniture, including a new wine cabinet, to replace older items.

04-05-2007, 02:20 PM
Oy, drama.

Sarah's mom will be attending the wedding as a guest, but won't be in any of the family photos, because she doesn't agree with the gay thing. So on her wedding day, my beautiful, loving partner won't have her mom with her. She just spent about half an hour throwing up from a stress migraine, and I am basically ready to kill someone.

Oh, by the way, two years ago when her mother got married, we disagreed strongly with her choice (he's pretty much an alcoholic, and super-controlling, and the second time we met him he got so drunk he peed all over Sarah's dads floor). We both attended the shower, even though we had to fly on a just-out-of-college budget. Sarah drove down with a car-full of flowers and did all the flowers for her mom's wedding. We went to the wedding, and even though I was engaged to her daughter and had been with her for 4.5 years, I wasn't in a single picture, even the big one with all the sisters and cousins and whathaveyous. She put me as an "And Guest" on the invitation (and again, we'd been together 4.5 years). We were there early to set up the flowers, we were there to take the pictures, and we generally smiled and acted jolly and never gave a hint of the fact that we didn't think this was a good idea.

Fast forward to now - she doesn't come to the shower, she is coming essentially as a "guest" at the wedding and isn't going to be in the family pictures, and is acting like we should be grateful she is showing up at all.

Sorry to vent but I'm really upset at the moment.

At least the lucky bamboo arrived?

04-05-2007, 02:26 PM
Aww mandalinn :hug:

That is a shame. There was some drama at my wedding as well. DH's sister (her BF specifically) and his parents weren't getting along so they did the whole "I'm not coming if so and so is coming" thing. So DH's sister ended up not coming. It was a shame but there had been friction months before but they started the drama stuff about a week or 2 before the wedding.

Oh and about registering. We didn't register. We ended up getting some nice gifts as well as gift cards and money. We basically have everything.

04-05-2007, 03:39 PM
Jeff and I have everything we need right now (since we've been living in our apartment together for a year and a half, and we'll be moving into a townhouse *hopefully* in the fall), but I want new stuff. Like others have mentioned, practucally everything I own is second-hand (or third or fourth) from friends and family. My dishes are so old that the blue design pattern around the edges is rubbed off in most spots. My silverware is an, hmm, eclectic collection of pieces from many many different styles, my crock pot is probably about 20 years old (that nice dark gold colored pot with the fake wood grain brown on the outside), my microwave is one my parents were going to throw away but gave to me when I went to college (7 years ago...) get the idea. Everything is functional enough, which is why I haven't replaced them, but I want something NEW and all my very own for once, ya know? :D

I've got quite a while before I get to think about registering for anything, though--I think at the earliest, we'll be tying the knot late spring 2008.

04-05-2007, 03:58 PM
I’m sorry mandalinn, that really is a shame. I hope it doesn’t bring you down too much on your big day. Unfortunately we can’t control how family will react to our choice of partner.

Our wedding will be the first time my family will meet my fiancée’s dad with his partner, I’m really hoping it doesn’t get too awkward. His partner a wonderful and kind man, but being that he’s Iranian, Jewish, and let’s just say flamboyant, he’s kind of “out there” by families white, Catholic, midwestern sensibilities. I’m not sure how/if I should preface the situation before the wedding. What do you say? “By the way, df’s dad is gay, please don’t embarrass me by acting like small-minded bigots”?

Jill – I’m in the same boat with you regarding the registry. I can’t wait to have silverware and china that match! I’ll be making a few trips to Goodwill with donations after the wedding. :D

04-05-2007, 06:31 PM
Aww, Mandalinn, I'm sorry. I hope for the best in your situation.

About registering, we are really saving in order to buy a house. We would prefer money, but there are some things that we need. We have both lived on our own, so we are going to prioritize with some of the things we really want (nice knife set, kitchenaid, matching towels...) then hope when those run out people will give money.

Okay, opinions about a dress, anyone? I am trying to save money wherever I can, and I have been looking at dresses for what feels like a long time, 4 months. I have a pretty good idea of what looks good on my body, and I found one on Ebay that I really like, for only $100. Here comes the big question: It is about a size and a half too small. 4 months to go. Should I chance it? It would require me losing about 2 inches off my bust and 2 inches off my waist. To me that sounds doable, but I don't want to drive myself crazy. What would you do?

04-05-2007, 06:45 PM
Oh, don't chance it. There is enough stress without knowing you have a dress to fit into and you have to lose X amt of pounds. It may cost a little extra money, but the piece of mind is WORTH IT to know you have a dress that needs to be taken in or fits perfectly.

04-05-2007, 07:56 PM
I agree with mandalinn...I have witnessed firsthand women who order a dress in a smaller size assuming they will be able to lose the weight in time, and then, lo and behold, they aren't small enough for the big day, and there is an innevitable emotional meltdown. There's enough stress around planning a wedding and the excitement of becoming a wife--no need to add to the long list of things to worry about.

04-06-2007, 10:44 AM
Just agreeing with the ladies here, I wouldn't chance it! Buy a dress that fits and you know you'll feel fabulous in. :)

04-06-2007, 02:43 PM
Update on the mom situation - its all up in the air. She and Sarah talked yesterday and things appear to have calmed slightly, she may not come to the rehearsal dinner if she does the pictures, but Sar made it clear to her how important it was that she be there for the photos, so we're hoping that'll sink in. Everything calmed down a little bit, which is good.

On the negative side, this is how I spent my evening...

Jilly, you said you might steal the lucky bamboo idea, so here is a pic of how they turned out - we got the stalks (1 straight and 1 spiral per favor) from: Total cost for the whole shipment of 100 stalks of each was about $250.00, then the glassware and river rocks at Wal-mart (99 cents for a bag of rocks that is enough to do 3 favors, 99 cents per glassware piece). Total cost per favor was about $4, which we think is reasonable considering its just a touch more than "standard" favors of candy, etc. once you add in packaging, ribbons, monogramming, and what have you and we like it a lot better.

04-06-2007, 02:44 PM
Okay, thanks for all the input. I will probably listen to reason. :)

Mandalinn, are you done with your honeymoon shopping?

04-06-2007, 02:47 PM
Oops, we posted at the same time mandalinn-

Wow, I really like the bamboo a lot. They look great. I'm sure your guests will be thrilled. How many hours to assemble them?

04-06-2007, 02:53 PM
Hehe! I am posting a million times. I thought this was hilarious, and if anyone else has played a Wii, she might think so, too.

04-06-2007, 03:04 PM
mandalinn, those look awesome!! For my small wedding of maybe 50 people (probably less), I'm sure it would be a snap (especially when I recruit my mother and sister to help me put things together ;) ). Definitely worth a slightly higher per-piece cost than candy or something, IMO.

NewDay, I'm not going to torture myself by clicking on that link since we still can't find a Wii around here :p The wii-seeker website doesn't even get updated anymore (not that I can just go hang out in line in front of a store for opening time even if I knew they were getting some since I work at 7am). If I were impatient, I'd pay the $350 going rate on ebay, but I'd rather save my $100 and pay the normal retail price when they're actually more widely available. I keep hoping Jeff's mother will be able to get us one since she lives out in the middle of nowhere.

04-06-2007, 04:48 PM
Well, those little ballerina bows are taking a long time for Sarah to do, but a regular bow on them would work just fine...Sarah is just a perfectionist because its a flower-related item and she is OCD about the flowers. It took me about 3-4 hours total (just one person working) to assemble all 75 of them - which includes unpacking the bamboo, arranging it in the bunches of 2, putting them in the glassware and holding them there while pouring in the rocks to hold them in place, and adding water (plus boxing them up for transport). So not too bad - maybe 25 favors per hour per person, and they are easy to do with no floral arranging experience. Added bonus - apparently two stalks of lucky bamboo symbolizes luck in love, which we did totally on accident but is a nice touch. Sarah's bows, however, take considerably longer - she'll spend probably 6-8 hours or so tying them (although she says she is going to teach me how, which will reduce the time somewhat, but not much as I am -not- crafty. When we were tying ribbon around the invites she got so frustrated that she just did them all herself...heeheehee). Even easier than tying a ribbon bow would be using silver twist-ties to hold the two stalks together, which is how most people do it - you need two twist-ties per arrangement.

We also had them ship us some extra bunches of bamboo, and arranged those into one big arrangement in a $4 glass dish garden container for a nice big buffet table arrangement. I think it will look really nice, and the added cost was minimal because they were already shipping us the bamboo and the container/rocks for it only cost about 8 dollars. We just grouped the bamboo in bunches of 5-6 stalks, tied them together, and put those in the large round container. Not only will it look nice and contemporary on the table, but its a nice arrangement for someone to take home, or in your own home after the ceremony is done - lucky bamboo does really well in bathrooms and other dark spaces because it hates direct sunlight, and its a fairly hard plant to kill.

Honeymoon shopping is done, which is nice...we also have dresses picked for all of the pre-wedding events. We have a couple more items that are shipping and should get here next week, and then we'll be ready to pack everything up. I am a little worried about my rehearsal dinner dress because it is strapless and I've shrunk a bit since I bought it, but hopefully I'll be able to wear it without worrying about wardrobe malfunctions.

I'll have to try to get pictures of the arch my dad is building for us this weekend if he lets me see it - it is quite an endeavor!

Oh, and if any of you have handy dads or dads that build things, we found the cutest father of the bride gift for mine! Just to give you background on my dad, he suggested he wear a tool belt instead of a cummerbund with his tux, because he has to assemble this giant arch that he custom welded. So for his FOB-gift, we bought him...working level cufflinks! On the card we wrote something to the effect of "we would never ask you to wear a tux without at least giving you a new tool to play with".

They have them in all kinds of colors to match many wedding themes, so if any of you have the type of dad more comfortable in a toolbelt than a suit, you might want to check them out.

Hope everyone is doing well and the planning is moving along!

04-06-2007, 05:03 PM
Mandalinn – Those cufflinks are a hoot, I love them! If I had known about those I would have gotten a pair from my brother in law. He’s quite the craftsman, he built the bench that he proposed to my sister on in his woodshop (so sweet!).

I love your bamboo favors, those bows may take some time but they sure do look nice.

I’m going to see my family for the first time since the engagement this weekend. Can’t wait to show off my ring. ;)

04-09-2007, 03:53 PM
Hey all....haven't been able to read everything and I am joining the game a little late, but I am a groom to be in just a little more than 3 months. I've got quite a ways to go in terms of my goal weight for the wedding, but at the same time I am looking at the bigger picture of losing weight for life and not just for the big day.

Anyways, if any of you have some wedding advice or want a man's perspective, I am going to be popping into the discussion if you don't mind.

04-09-2007, 04:33 PM
Ballznpucks! Welcome! I'm trying to focus on the bigger picture too, which is why I'm OK with not being quite at goal for the wedding. I'm in this for life, not to look a certain way on that day (it is a nice bonus, but not what I'm here for).

Give us details on the big day! 3 months is SO SOON, it goes so incredibly quickly (says the girl who has under 2 weeks left).

04-09-2007, 04:34 PM
I realise you all are on page 8 (and now I am as well) but add me to the list :)

While I don't want to lose weight just because I want to look da*m fine on my wedding day, I also don't want to be a chunky bride (and I mean no offense by that, it's just I, *myself* am not comfortable at this weight and I don't want to get married this way either).

We're looking at October 2008. Destination wedding. Just me, my guy and his kids (*my* kids - love them!). Probably Croatia or Greece. No idea yet about anything else! I don't even have my bling yet! :D

04-09-2007, 04:51 PM
Welcome also to Velveteen! There are so many good ideas here being bounced about.

04-09-2007, 04:55 PM
mandalinn~ I just wanted to say I think it's an absolute shame that your partner's mother is acting the way she is. Obviously this is not just a "gay thing" - regardless of being gay or straight or WHATEVER you two LOVE each other... isn't that what it's supposed to be about????

Love your dresses too btw ;)

04-09-2007, 05:00 PM
woohoo! New additions to the group! Welcome :D

Velveteen, a destination wedding so far away sounds awesome! I was thinking of doing a destination wedding, but I decided I really wanted my parents and my sister's family and Jeff's cousins and so on, and it would just be too much of a hassle for everyone to have to travel.

ballznpucks, 3 months will fly by, I'm sure! How involved are you in all the planning? I can't get anything other than, "I don't care, whatever you want," out of my fiance. This is why we have not picked a date (or even month or season) or a location (not a facility, but even the STATE in which we will do the deed) :dizzy:

We went to Jeff's cousins' for Easter (his older cousin and her husband and 3 sons--she was basically a mother to him growing up). She mentioned that they expect to pay for our rehearsal dinner (she said she meant his mother, but I know his mother has like NO money, so the cousin will likely be footing the bill), which I guess is how it's done traditionally. But I was thinking--do we even HAVE a rehearsal dinner? I mean, I don't really plan on haveing a wedding party. If we have anything at all, it will just be my sister as a Matron of Honor and Jeff's cousin as a Best Man--no groomsmen or bridemaids or kids or anything. So who knows...we'll just figure it out as we go along :p

04-09-2007, 05:15 PM
Jill~ I've been married before and so has my FH. I would love for my family to actually give a crap and want to come to any wedding of mine, but unfortunately that's just not the case (When I married in 2002 I asked my mother to come and at first she said "no" because she hates flying this far and "what about terrorists?" ). The story is long and, well, I don't want to bore you or drive any of you away from me so I'll leave it at that :D

In any case, we live in the Netherlands, so Croatia and Greece are not that far away, but still bring romantic images to the mind :) We are going to Rhodos for summer holiday this year (with the kids) and in October we are going to Croatia (Dubrovnik) to see what we think of the place. After both trips we'll decide where to go...

Our date depends on when the kids have school vacation ~ on the one hand I hate having to plan around that, on the other hand it's REALLY important that they are there. I only worry that it's real close to their mum's birthday and I don't want to take anything away from their own mother's special day. We just have to cross that bridge when we get there. Luckily we have a great relationship with her and she'll most likely have no issue with the date.

Jill, your "rehearsal dinner" can actually be as many or little people as you want. I think the biggest thing brides come up against is fitting into a sort of traditional mold. You need to do what is best for you and Jeff. After all, it's the two of you getting married, not anyone else :)

04-09-2007, 05:36 PM
Jill, your "rehearsal dinner" can actually be as many or little people as you want. I think the biggest thing brides come up against is fitting into a sort of traditional mold. You need to do what is best for you and Jeff. After all, it's the two of you getting married, not anyone else :)
Oh, we're definitely not doing the traditional thing--that's about the only thing we have decided so far :dizzy: I just meant that I don't know if you need a rehearsal dinner AT ALL since there's really no need for a rehearsal for just the bride and groom, right?

04-09-2007, 05:41 PM
I had a pre wedding dinner at Clyde's in Chevy Chase. That place is awesome. It wasn't a rehearsal dinner but it was basically a get together dinner for my family members that flew in for the wedding and DH's parents. I really enjoyed it since even though my wedding was small, I didn't spend most of my time with my immediate family but rather the family/friends who came to the reception.

I really just thought of it as a pre wedding dinner to get together with those that I wanted to spend a little more time with. If that makes sense. I really appreciated having the chance to do it. So you can make it your own and call it what you like or you can omit it entirely.

04-09-2007, 05:55 PM
a "pre-wedding" dinner sounds great actually :) if you are not going the traditional route it's still nice to share your "last" dinner as a single person with the ones you love most. We are most likely going to go away for 5 days min and share this dinner with the 4 of us (me, R and the kids). I'm really looking forward to it and I know for sure my step-daughter is really going to love the whole ritual of all of it, as non-traditional as it will be (my step-son as well, but, you know, we girls will definitely do the "girly" thing for the wedding...)

04-09-2007, 06:18 PM
My "rehearsal dinner" is actually coming an hour after the actual rehearsal which will be quick, and like Nelie said, I'm using it to spend more time with the people who came in from out of town or who I won't be able to spend as much time with at the wedding. Well, specifically I'm using it to get a little baby time in with Julia, the 5 month old I haven't yet met who is part of my extended time! However, the invite list can get out of hand, as evidenced by our soiree, for which people were given "courtesy" invites when Sarah's dad thought they wouldn't make it, and now they are all the rehearsal dinner is consisting of just under half of our guests :-). Ah well, it'll be fun to get together with everyone.

04-09-2007, 06:19 PM
I'm getting married in November...and setting the date is about all I've gotten done. (Aside from choosing the groom, naturally.) The biggest thing that has me worried is the dress...I want to wait until I'm slimmer to really go shopping for one, but everyone says you need to order the dress six months ahead of time. I've been putting it off with the "Oh, I'm far too busy, I'm graduating in May and saved all my hard classes for the very end!" excuse, but I worry I'll still be dragging my heels after finals because I won't feel skinny enough. I wouldn't be so worried about the time, except that I'm very, very picky about clothing...I browse on the internet, and all I can do is point out everything that's wrong with every dress I see. *sigh*

Anyway, congrats, everyone!

04-09-2007, 06:31 PM
Newbie here! I got engaged about a month ago but I've been with the boy for 6 years now. We are planning to wed in May of 08 but are thinking of possibly moving it up to March of 08 instead. I can't decide! lol I'm on Medifast and intend on losing quite a bit before I even think of dress shopping, but I can't wait!!

Congrats to the rest of you! What an exciting thing to get to chat about!

04-09-2007, 06:46 PM
The biggest thing that has me worried is the dress...I want to wait until I'm slimmer to really go shopping for one, but everyone says you need to order the dress six months ahead of time.

I ordered my dress in a size 18, because I wanted to get it squared away. You can get the dress taken in a LOT if you find a specialist. My lady is fabulous, she specializes in refurbishment of vintage gowns for modern wearers, so she is well used to doing major size changes. My dress went from an 18W down to a 10/12 with absolutely no problems, so you may have to sink some extra money into your seamstressing, but don't put it off just because you have more weight to lose! You'll get a secret thrill every time your seamstress tells you she has to take it in more, and that alone is worth the extra money you'll spend on reconstructing the dress to match your new size.

Yay new brides! Ya'll will be able to keep the thread going long after I'm back from the honeymoon.

I just checked The Knot (by the way, people, The Knot is fabulous - message boards to get recommendations on vendors in your area, vendor search features, and interactive guest list / to-do list / budget planning tools. These were SO helpful to me. I found all of my best vendors by cruising the knot boards looking for recommendations...I even found a whole group of brides who had done their weddings at the same location that I am using, sharing ideas that are specific to the space. Its amazing and can help you find people to make your day special...most already-marrieds on there have profiles, too, with their vendor's work. So for example, if you have a bakery in mind, if you can find a Knottie who got married a few months ago and used the bakery, you can see their pictures of how the cake turned out, as well as their ratings of the vendors. And the checklist is oh so helpful.). My to-do list just reminded me that I have only 11 days to go!!!!!

Oh, and the arch my daddy is building for us makes me cry every time I think about it. He is welding it just for me on his days off, and its going to be so mom is sewing the fabric to cover it, and he is doing all of the welding to make it magical for us. I saw it for the first time this weekend and I am SO EXCITED.

04-10-2007, 01:27 AM
An interesting thing happened to me when I was having lunch with one of my dearest and oldest friends.

I was talking about how I still want to lose some more weight. (Some people are of the opinion that I should just stop where I am) She smiled, said I looked great, then asked if I wanted to lose more weight to look slim on my wedding day.

I instantly replied, "no." Then I had to think about why that was my gut reaction. It really comes down to wanting to be more slim and fit, just for life. Sure, I would be happy to feel like a perfect 10, thin lady on my wedding day. But I realize that my husband to be finds me gorgeous, and I like me.

That feels good.

04-10-2007, 02:30 AM
Christine - wow! What a great realization. I had to zen out over my weight loss as we approached - life happens, and I'm not just plowing toward a single goal for a single day - I am working toward my goals for the rest of my life, and wherever I am on my wedding day isn't the end-all be-all of my goals.

Way to go on being so positive!

04-10-2007, 11:17 AM
Hello to the new ladies (and gent)! :wave:

Lori – I think we might be living in parallel universes. My df and I will be celebrating our 6 year anniversary on April 27, we’ve been engaged for a bit over a month and we’re getting married May 25, 2008. :dizzy:

I’m also thinking of weight loss as a long-term/lifestyle project. After all, I lost the weight I did last year before I was engaged, and I'll be working on this long into married life. However the engagement has kick started my efforts again, I needed a kick in the pants!

We did some reception site searching yesterday, because my #1 choice is booked already! :cry: After looking around a bit I realized that I really wanted the Memorial Union for a number of reasons (on the lake, nostalgic factor, price) but alas, they actually kind of chuckled when we asked about our date. Apparently, for holiday weekends (It’ll be Memorial Day) if you don’t put your request in 18 months in advance you don’t stand a chance in ****. We like the Monona Terrace as well, but it will be a LOT more expensive. I’m just not sure what to do now. I hate to throw up my hands and just plan a traditional hotel reception, but I just don’t know what else to do? :?:

On an unrelated note, we are supposed to get 7 inches of snow by tomorrow. Where is this Spring I've been hearing so much about?

04-10-2007, 11:21 AM
She smiled, said I looked great, then asked if I wanted to lose more weight to look slim on my wedding day.

I instantly replied, "no." Then I had to think about why that was my gut reaction. It really comes down to wanting to be more slim and fit, just for life.

My doctor asked me the same thing. "Are you dieting just for the wedding?" I wanted to slap him and say "Yes, and I'm hoping to gain it all back the day after"... :dizzy: give me a break! Yes, the wedding is part of the reason I started a new diet but why is that a bad thing? I could see it being bad if it were the only reason I was trying to get fit.

04-10-2007, 12:59 PM
Shananigans - we actually picked out date, based on availability of the church and the reception site. I had originally wanted October, but figured September 29th was close enough.

Any chance you could change your date?

04-10-2007, 01:11 PM
We picked the date based on the availability of the ceremony site and the general timeframe we already had in mind. The site is only available every other weekend, so 2 weeks earlier and you risk it being too cold, and 2 weeks later lands you on June 8, and for some reason Jason has it in his head that he does not want the wedding in June. It is statistically the month with more rain, but trying to pick a day it will not rain over a year in advance is always a gamble anyway I say. Also, with the ceremony being on a Sunday, having the following Monday be a holiday will likely be more convenient for lots of folks since almost everyone is coming from out of town. I may check the availability of the Union for June 8 anyway, if it’s available I’ll see if df can’t be swayed. If that means a bit fewer out-of-towners I don’t really mind so much.

04-10-2007, 01:15 PM
Thanks for the warm welcome....yes 3 months is going to go very fast. We are actually approaching the day that we got engaged, April 14th, her birthday. We began wanting something as simple as possible, but we have very active social lives and pretty good sized famlies, so we are now inviting over 350...yes, a little more than what we originally thought. Oh well, it should be fun. We've worked very hard to save a lot of money and are very excited.

In terms of planning....I would say I am fairly involved. I am good at getting things done that don't involve the style of the wedding. For instance, she has been riding solo making the invites, but I've booked the photographer, arranged the meetings with our pastor, contacted the wedding coordinator at the church, the pastor and am doing some of the daily phone call things that she can't do as a teacher.

Last night we sat down and figured out our vows and our exchanging of the rings routine, and started to nail down some of the music for the ceremony. It's starting to come together....

But I can sense what your man is saying, but "Sure" and "sounds good" "I don't care.." because it reality for the guy, our biggest decision has already been made. We are usually the ones that determine if and when we become engaged and once that decision is made, the planning of the wedding can kind of be hard for those of us who really, truly don't care whether the colors are blue or green. ya know? I just rambled a lot. sorry.

04-10-2007, 01:39 PM
haha, feel free to ramble away! I don't mind that Jeff doesn't care about colors or flowers or whatever, but I asked him last night if he even had any ideas/preferences as far as time of year (yes, we have yet to pick a season, let alone set a date) or even where in the country (near our home in DC, near the majority of my family in CT, near my immediate family in VA Beach, a different place as a destination wedding, etc.) :dizzy:

04-10-2007, 01:45 PM
ballznpucks – No need to apologize for rambling, that’s what these here forums are for. ;)

Update: the Union is available on June 8, but that is also the weekend of Madison Jazz Fest. The festivities don’t start until 5 and we plan on having an early ceremony (1pm), so we could feasibly have most of the reception stuff wrapped up by then (dinner and toasts, cake cutting, etc.) If we want to go the traditional route with a DJ and dancing for the remainder of the night, that might be a problem as the live Jazz music on the terrace would likely compete with the DJ music, I am not looking for a cacophony of noise at my reception! Ah well, I’ve pitched the idea over to df, we’ll see what he says.

04-10-2007, 01:52 PM
Regarding men and weddings...
I basically did all the planning for our wedding. I would present ideas to DH and ask his opinion about it but it wasn't like he would say something "what about this?". He did end up picking the season as he said he said he wanted a short engagement. We didn't really have colors other than my dress was basically a light yellow so his tux had a yellow vest and the flowers were "bright fall colors".

The funny thing was that on the day before the wedding, DH was the one that had a bridezilla moment. I was the one stressing about everything working out and hoping that something wouldn't go wrong but he was the one with the bridezilla moment. It was kind of amusing :)

04-10-2007, 03:39 PM
My guy wanted a short engagement. He asked me on NYE and wanted to get married this summer! Yikes! Honestly, it's OK, but on the other hand, his first thought was Vegas and I thought to myself "I'm overweight, we'll be travelling to the States WITH the kids, it'll be hotter than the sun itself in Vegas in July... I don't think so" :lol:

Then we started throwing out ideas to each other, when I started researching more European destinations... then we decided that early fall would be best - off season AND still warm enough to do a beach ceremony in greece or croatia!

04-10-2007, 03:43 PM
Velveteen - Mine was shorter than that, he asked me in early summer and wanted to get married in the fall. In 4 months though we were able to do all the wedding planning and I was able to lose 30 lbs.

I went to Greece a few years ago in the fall and it was very nice. I want to go back but there are so many other places to visit.

04-10-2007, 05:09 PM
Jeez I miss out on a lot of chatter pretty quickly!

Leo and I decided to register for a honeymoon... both of us are coming from student financial situations (that is, we are both next to broke) and therefore have no money to spend on a honeymoon right now. We were going to settle for postponing it until our 1 year anniversary, but then I decided hey, we only get one shot at this. (In theory,) you only get one chance at a honeymoon! So we changed our priorities and set up a honeymoon registry, which I think is a really neat idea. (We used if anyone wants to see the site.) We've already been bought a night's stay and a dinner :) Now for that hot air balloon ride.... :p

I think I've found an officiant, finally. After exhausting the THREE options we had local to our wedding, we found someone here in Charlottesville who is willing to travel up to the wedding site. Thank goodness. Leo wasn't keen on having a friend ordained, he's very particular about things being "above board" and no amount of convincing could make him believe that ordaining a friend was 100% legit. Ah well. Don't know who we would have picked, anyway. But this woman is incredibly nice, friendly, flexible, and supportive. Which are all good qualities in an officiant! So hurray for that!

Flowers are being a HUGE pain in the butt. One of the co-owners of our wedding site owns a floral business in DC, and we were told we had to use them if we were going to use a florist. So I try calling them.... they say that perhaps they are not doing things like that anymore, that I ought to talk to the manager of the site... I call him, and I call him, and I email him, and no response. I can't seem to get an answer as to whether we have to go through these people in DC or not anymore. I'd rather not, as getting the flowers from 2+hours away is kind of a pain.... but I would if I had to. I just need to know, the clock is ticking!! Less than 3 months to go!!

twistedhoneydew: You DO have a little more wiggle-room before you have to order your dress. If you wait much longer you'll have to pay a bit more for a rush order, but do know that you don't have to have exactly six months before your wedding in order to make things work. I agree with mandalinn though, you should get your dress at your current size and then take the little thrills that come with having to get a garment taken in!!

mandalinn: I have been trying to navigate the Knot but am finding it difficult for some reason. My sister gave me a book by the Knot people (something something Guide to Weddings) that she used when she planned hers, which has been helpful on regular etiquette and things I'm expected to do that I didn't know I was expected to do!
I hope we get to see wedding photos. I'd love to see the arch your father is building, I can just imagine how beautiful it must be. What a special contribution to your wedding!

ballznpucks: wow, you are pretty darn involved! I nearly had a heart attack when my fiance decided to try to help me find an officiant the other day since I told him I had been having issues. Otherwise it's been all me. I haven't minded much, and he does have an excuse since he's in a different country right now :p I'm going to have to go back through the thread -- when is your wedding date? I'm feeling ya on the 3 months flying by... I'm three months away and I'm wondering where all the time I need is going to come from.

shananigans: a 1pm ceremony and you expect to be out before 5? That's pretty quick! Then again, my schedule's not that much different. it just sounds quick :lol: You can always have another venue that you move the party to for the evening/dancing bit if you care to include that without the cacophonous intrusion of a jazz festival. We are having a noon ceremony (hopefully about 20 mins) followed by 1hr photos/hors-douvres followed by a late lunch, then there is a three hour break when everyone (including me!) gets to change and we're going to meet at an irish restaurant/pub for snacks and drinks and whatever ends up happening for the rest of the night. :)

Loooong post.. but that's what i get for staying away from this thread!

04-10-2007, 05:50 PM
Trust me as involved as I am, she is doing much more. But I do try to take care of some things that I am able to.

July 14th is the date.

Ok, so a dilemma I came across last night was finding some good readings from the Bible for the ceremony. I don't mean to offend, but there is not a lot of good things said in the Bible about a man's relationship with a woman that translate in today's world. I want to find some verses that won't be read at all 10 weddings I am going to from now to October, but after spending a few hours last night, I am not sure there are a ton out there.

I actually could't believe some of the things I read last night as suggested readings. Let's just say, since those times, women's role in the church, family and in society have come a long way. I guess I just imagined more to choose from, since the number one thing in my faith is love and caring for other people.

I may have found one or two worth using, but I may mix in a poem that better fits our love and feelings for each other as well.

Bla bla.....your thoughts?

04-11-2007, 11:05 AM
Well, my df seems dead set on the May date, so I guess I will bend since I was the one who absolutely said no to one of the ceremony sites he was interested in and went with the one I preferred. I guess we are practicing for a lifetime of compromising. Now that I’m thinking about it the reception is really more about having fun with everyone, the location isn’t as important as a lot of other things. So we’ll keep looking into the Monona Terrace and maybe a hotel or two downtown.

ballznpucks – I think your idea of mixing in a poem or maybe some prose that better fits you is a great idea. I remember at my sister’s wedding they had a Biblical reading (don’t remember which one) that seemed a bit odd and out of place in the scope of modern notions of relationships and marriage, so I see where you might be having difficulty. We’re having a civil ceremony so we won’t have any readings that are specifically religious in nature, but I think we’ll try to incorporate some readings and traditions that reflect both of our family backgrounds.

Jason has been plenty involved since day one, in fact I was the one who suggested Vegas (only half joking :o). I know our wedding will be special and I’ll love it, but dang weddings are a lot of work!

04-11-2007, 01:40 PM
ok, so ladies, make someone else wash the dishes the weeks before your wedding!

I slashed my finger open on my chef's knife last night - an ER visit, 5 stitches, and one giant bandage later, here i am. Not only does it hurt, but hello, i have a giant freaking hole in my finger.

The stitches will supposedly be able to come out 4 days (yes, just 4 days) before the wedding.

Oh, and forecasts are now leaning toward rain :-)

04-11-2007, 02:31 PM
mandalinn, I'm so sorry about your finger! At least the stitches can come out before the wedding, and at least it wasn't worse! And I am sorry, but I did chuckle a bit reading your post--not a funny situation, but just how expressive you are ;)

Oh and as for the weather, our forecast for tomorrow will probably change by tonight--you really never know, so don't let it get you down. Nothing you can do about it anyway!

04-11-2007, 02:35 PM
I think lots of brides would have freaked out, but I am the world's biggest klutz, and we were actually taking bets on what i would do to injure myself beforehand. Sarah was saying it'd be crutches, so unless i manage to do something else, this is better. And we do have a rain plan in place...even if its not ideal, the day will go on and the ceremony will be on the dance floor, not on the patio...luckily, my dad is building the arch to go either place and I WILL set it up inside, no matter how silly it looks.

It was just so ridiculous that one has to freak out or laugh. I'm trying the laughing.

04-11-2007, 03:33 PM
I guess the bright side would be that it didn't happen while you were in your white dress.

04-13-2007, 10:54 AM
Mandalinn - sorry to hear about your injury, but Ballz is right - better now than then!

I'm pretty excited - we are going to look at wedding bands tomorrow. The jeweler that I worked with on my e-ring is in the process of moving, so instead of working with her, we get to go to the actual showroom of the ring designer to see what they have that might go with my e-ring. Of course, it's just a happy coincidence that they are located in NY and only 2 hours from me! Otherwise we'd be doing this by mail, which is what we did before. DF is hoping to find something in their mens collection as well. Wish us luck! I'm really going to try to stick with something they have ready made, and not go down the path of having something custom made - we really don't need to spend that extra money!

Finally did something about a dress - I found something I loved on eBay, and I won the auction! It should be here late next week as she needed to have it cleaned. The key thing was that it had sleeves! They are lace and see-through, but that's ok, it's still sleeves, and not those "tack-on" ones that David's has for their dresses - I just didn't like how that looked. This dress is from David's as well - I'm hoping it will fit, or be close, as I've not tried anything on yet. Don't know what my deal with that is, but just not something I've wanted to subject myself to. This dress should be my size or just a size small, so it should work out well. It's white, and I'd been looking at ivory, but I'm willing to make that compromise.

I'll send a photo once I get it.

I was thinking yesterday - I've done nothing about music at the church, and I've got just shy of 6 months left. Am I behind schedule on that?

04-13-2007, 01:41 PM
Cindy - we only hired our ceremony musicians a month before the wedding - now THAT was behind. You have plenty of time to work that out.

Can't wait to see photos of the dress!

We did our final fitting, the dresses were all pressed and pretty:

My sister is flying out today, our bachelorette is tomorrow night, and my sister's shower is on Sunday. Then I have just one more day of work (two if I get slammed, but I am officially on vacation starting Tuesday) and the true wedding madness begins!

or, in other words, Holy Smokes, I'm getting married in 8 days!

04-13-2007, 02:44 PM
WOW, mandalinn, that came up fast--and I'm not even involved! 8 days...aside from all the stress and worry and planning and fitting and verifying, you must be so excited!!

I'm going to a friend's bachelorette party in 2 weeks--does that count for anything? :p She's getting married on May 5th--Cinco de Mayo, baby! I thought that was a really fun and cool idea. Lots of margaritas at her reception!

04-14-2007, 03:16 PM
Ack, Mandalinn! a week! You must be thrilled and jittery and super-excited.

Well, I have a dress. These pictures are really awful, but I am very happy. It's so ME. It has a small sweep train. I'll post better pictures later when I am not taking them myself, hehe.

04-15-2007, 09:56 AM
Your dress is beautiful! Congrats on finding one you love! I can't wait to see the rest of it :)

04-15-2007, 10:05 PM


04-15-2007, 10:34 PM
hehe, looks like fun

04-16-2007, 11:13 AM
mandalinn – Your dress looks so lovely, and fits perfectly I see! Looks like you had a good time at your bachelorette, y’all are just adorable. You are just days away now, you must be exploding with excitement.

Christine – You must be so happy you found your dress, I love that neckline.

04-16-2007, 03:28 PM
Christine, your dress is lovely! So glad you found something you liked! Fingers crossed for me that I like mine when it gets here!

I picked out my wedding band this weekend - I only changed my mind a million times, but finally found something that I thought went well with my e-ring. It's a beaded-set yellow gold band, with milligrain edges and engraving on all other surfaces. 9 small diamonds across the finger. I saw it in white gold, which looks very different with diamonds than yellow does, so I hope it looks ok. Very old-fashioned looking though, which is what I wanted.

And, DF found an ArtCarved band which he liked, so we're making progress in that area as well! Just need to check a few things before finalizing for him.

Mandalinn - couldn't open your photo here on my work machine, but will look at it at home tonight. You must be so excited - it's just a few short days to go!

04-16-2007, 05:01 PM

I am so excited reading this thread I've just read all 11 pages in 20 minutes!! Your weddings all sound amazing and your dresses are beautiful! We're getting married in Warwick (the Uk one!) on November 9th and it's all booked up
We are marrying here (, with the reception here ( and I shall be wearing this ( which will look a lot better once I've dropped another 15lbs!!

I hope you don't mind me joining in, but to be able to talk about weight loss and weddings is fantastic. I'm so impressed with the little touches (favours/ hand rolled soaps etc..) which you don't seem to see as much emphasis on over this side of the pond

Velveteen- I've been to Lindos on Rhodes (which is where I think one of the major wedding destinations is, at St Paul's Bay, at the foot of where the Acropolis is meant to have stood- if my history is right) and it was so beautfiul.

04-16-2007, 05:24 PM
Clareh - Welcome! I -love- the detail work, its like crack for me, honestly...I thrive on details!

I absolutely LOVE Maggie Sottero dresses! They are so gorgeous and fit so beautifully. My sister is wearing one for her wedding in July. And what a gorgeous pair of sites! It is going to be gorgeous, I am sure.

Everyone keeps being amazed at how calm I am. And I am, really, quite calm. I don't know if I burned out on stress early or am just well prepared, but we are less than a week away and I'm just excited.

04-16-2007, 05:50 PM
Thanks for the welcome Mandalinn.

I love my Maggie dress. I tried on quite a few which 'hung' off me- I'm a very busty apple shape and clearly have a body made for corsets!! Every one I tried on was flattering and it was just finding the one which I liked the best (I thought it would be a real trial getting dresses when you don't have the best body image but I felt lovely).

I think that if you're calm now, that's likely to be the way forward- the big stuff is done (and the small stuff by the sounds of it) I'm sure that you are really, really well prepared- if the soaps are handrolled already then there's not a lot more to do!! How exciting- you two will be so gorgeous!!

04-16-2007, 11:55 PM
Hi! You guys sound awesome!

Amanda, I can completely relate to your OCD- and clumsiness! I have almost the total wedding planned a year in advance and I did not plan before the proposal- I was really superstitious about it, actually.

I'm getting married March 29, 2008 and have decided to start getting back to the size/weight I was when we started dating. Ah, love...

Ballz, our wedding ceremony will be pretty traditional- we are total fogeys. At the end of the day, we decided we want the same words said at our wedding that people have been staying married to for generations. It made it one less decision we had to make, too ;) You'll know the poem when you see it!

My favorite bridal magazine so far has been The Bride and Bloom. I think it's new and I got my ideas for color scheme and flowers there. Has anyone else found a great wedding info source?

04-20-2007, 03:30 AM
Mandalinn- is it one day to go now???? Have a woderful day!

I'm going to see a florist at lunchtime to try and eke out my tiny floral budgets. My Easter pounds have come off now so I am feeling good about getting into my dress next week at the trial.

04-20-2007, 12:14 PM
Mandalinn - Just popping in to wish you much luck and happiness on your big day, I'm sure it will be just beautiful. Enjoy that honeymoon ;)

04-21-2007, 08:09 PM
Well here it is 5 months and 20 days till my wedding, I am no where NEAR my weight loss goal, in fact I havent budged one single pound! I have been lazy and unmotivated, but the thought of everyone looking at my wide rear at the alter has made me decide I was going to do something. I started my weight watchers plan today and set a calendar day to day what activites I will do for excersice. I have 60 pounds I want to loose (pre-baby weight), but realize I probably cant reach that in 5 months. So my goal is 30 pounds by September 14th! (

04-21-2007, 10:40 PM
Mandalinn - hope your day was wonderful - enjoy the honeymoon!

We had our Pre-cana class today - for those who aren't catholic, this is a requirement of getting married in the church. The requirement is different in different parishes and with differen priests - ours was an 8-hour course about marriage. DF actually enjoyed the class, and told me after he was glad we'd gone. He'd initially agreed to go under much protest. Anyway, the older couple who taught the class read a great blessing at the beginning of the course, and I wanted to share it with you all - I think we may use it in our ceremony.

~ James Dillet Freeman ~

May your marriage bring you all the exquisite excitements a marriage should bring, and may life grant you also patience, tolerance, and understanding.

May you always need one another - not so much to fill your emptiness as to help you to know your fullness. A mountain needs a valley to be complete; the valley does not make the mountain less, but more; and the valley is more a valley because it has a mountain towering over it. So let it be with you and you.

May you need one another, but not out of weakness.
May you want one another, but not out of lack.
May you entice one another, but not compel one another.
May you embrace one another, but not out encircle one another.
May you succeed in all important ways with one another, and not fail in the little graces.
May you look for things to praise, often say, "I love you!" and take no notice of small faults.

If you have quarrels that push you apart, may both of you hope to have good sense enough to take the first step back.

May you enter into the mystery which is the awareness of one another's presence - no more physical than spiritual, warm and near when you are side by side, and warm and near when you are in separate rooms or even distant cities.
May you have happiness, and may you find it making one another happy.
May you have love, and may you find it loving one another.

04-22-2007, 03:05 PM
Cindy- I really like that poem a lot. I am going to share it with the fiance.

Kathie- Hello and welcome! I hope that you find all the support you need. Try to take it easy on yourself, though. No matter what, you will look gorgeous on your wedding day, marrying the man of your dreams!

Clareh- How did the florist go? I am considering ordering flowers bulk online, then hand-tying bouquets. Haven't made up my mind, since that is a lot of work.

Lafayette- I haven't heard of Bride and Bloom. I really enjoy Martha Stewart Weddings.

Mandalinn- I thought of you yesterday. I imagine it will be a while until you read this, but hope you are enjoying yourself.

As for me, Micah officially proposed Tuesday night! haha... everyone was happy, but we heard a lot of "about times." I have pictures of my ring, but it will still be a few weeks before I get the real one. I am so happy, and I really wish we could be out looking and booking a place, but I HAVE to finish this semester of school. So, instead of fun wedding stuff, I am writing a 6-page paper on image denoising and writing a presentation.

P.S. On the diet front, I need to start eating well again, rather than stress eating all the time. Sigh...

04-23-2007, 01:55 PM
Hello all,

Christine – Congrats on the “official” proposal!

Well, not too much happening on the wedding front. We have an appointment to look at our top contender for a receptions spot next weekend. There will be a reception going on there so we can check things out while they're begin set up, so that should be a good reference point.

Spent a lot of time looking at open houses yesterday. DF and I are looking into the possibility of buying a home, the research is a lot of leg work. In fact, I'm pretty exhausted today. :lol:

04-23-2007, 02:05 PM
Amanda--can't wait to hear stories and see pictures of the big day and honeymoon!!

Shananigans--Jeff and I are doing home reserch, too. We rent right now, but we really want to own a place. We don't want a condo that is basically the same as our apartment (in a high rise) because it doesn't feel very "homey" to us, so we're hoping to be able to afford a townhouse or even a small single family home, but things are SO expensive here! I've been doing research on possibl mortgage loan options and acceptable neighborhoods, and we're not even moving till the fall (our lease runs out October 31, so we want to close on a home by the end of September so we can take our time gradually moving/cleaning/fixing things in October).

Our wedding plans are actually on hold until after we move--no need to stress myself out with both at the same time :dizzy:

04-23-2007, 03:02 PM
DH and I are also looking at homes. We've seen most of the new developments in our area and all of them are trying to be huge and "luxury" townhomes. All we want is a simple townhome with a small yard. Out of all the townhomes we've seen, only 2 had any type of yard. All others had tiny balconies. We actually picked a general location where there are some townhomes built in the 70s and 80s. There is a dog park, which will be great because we want a dog and it is in a really good location. Only problem is we will be paying for the location :) We are also looking at buying at the end of the year or early next year. The plan is either in June or July to make contact with a realtor and then go on from there.

04-23-2007, 04:06 PM
nelie, I soooo wish Jeff and I had more flexibility with location. I know you're in Maryland, so maybe you can appreciate that Jeff works in Forestville, MD, and I work in Fairfax, VA--yup, VERY opposite directions, which is why we currently live in Alexandria, which is a perfect midpoint (if we lived in a less densely populated area, I'd be squeamish about putting all these city names online, but I think you'd still have to be three steps above a PI to find anyone around here :dizzy: ). However, we can't afford any townhouses in Alexandria, so we moved a little down the 95 corridor...nope, can't afford anything in Springfield; keep moving...nope, nothing in Lorton, either...lookes like we'll be setting up camp in Woodbridge. I hate to go so far south down the evil, evil 95 corridor in VA, but geographically and financially, it seems to be the only feasible solution.

04-23-2007, 05:20 PM
The possibility of owning property is one of the many reason we decided to relocate back to Madison. DF’s best friend from high school got married and bought a house in Silver Spring, MD last summer, they paid over $300,000 for a 750 sq ft townhouse! We looked at a few properties back when we were living in LA just for fun, and oh my goodness, what 4 mil can buy you! :eek: It’s fun to dream, but comparing the two markets it’s unbelievable how much more reasonable housing costs are here.

We saw a townhouse yesterday that we’re quite interested in, but for now the lady is remaining pretty firm about her asking price, which is just a bit too much of a stretch for us. DF did some research and found a comparable condo in the neighborhood with another bedroom (a 3 br vs 2) listed at the same price, and another 2 br listed for less. We're going to check those out as well. So hopefully she comes to her senses and will consider an offer in the price range we’d be more likely to put a bid in for. We’ll see, just the thought of being a homeowner is very exciting.

04-23-2007, 06:36 PM
nelie, I soooo wish Jeff and I had more flexibility with location. I know you're in Maryland, so maybe you can appreciate that Jeff works in Forestville, MD, and I work in Fairfax, VA--yup, VERY opposite directions, which is why we currently live in Alexandria, which is a perfect midpoint (if we lived in a less densely populated area, I'd be squeamish about putting all these city names online, but I think you'd still have to be three steps above a PI to find anyone around here :dizzy: ). However, we can't afford any townhouses in Alexandria, so we moved a little down the 95 corridor...nope, can't afford anything in Springfield; keep moving...nope, nothing in Lorton, either...lookes like we'll be setting up camp in Woodbridge. I hate to go so far south down the evil, evil 95 corridor in VA, but geographically and financially, it seems to be the only feasible solution.

Wow that is crazy. I had to look up where Forestville is at. That is on the other side of 495. I actually live and work off of 270 and we are lucky in that both of us work near eachother and can buy a home within a few miles of work.

Shan, prices have actually dropped a bit here. I think it'd be a bit cheaper if we actually did live in Silver Spring but it would also mean dealing with hellish traffic. I think we actually found a the one tiny spot in the DC metro area that doesn't seem as crazy, crowded and trafficky but we are also at the outer fringe of it.

04-26-2007, 12:10 AM
Christine- The Bride and Bloom is new. I think the issue currently on newstands is only the second issue. Their website is the same as the name. I found it at Target. BTW Best wishes!!!

Good luck to everyone with their house hunting! I'm sure your agents have already advised you but, just in case, it's worth your while to research the length of time a property has been on the market. As a general rule, the longer the sellers have had to pay the mortgage, the more eager they are to sell versus make another month's payment. (I'm guessing) I'm older so most of my friends are combining households and trying to sell a home. Many started out looking to land a huge profit and would now be thrilled with any offer, especially for the few who have been trying to sell for 8-10 months.

Back to weddings ;) I work for a nonprofit so I called on a few "non-traditional" vendors for our catering, invitations and photography. I could not be more pleased with the results! We're getting custom-designed invitations for almost the same price as the discount catalogs from a professional graphic designer who typically does advertising, great "event" photography and linens/settings/glassware/appetizers/salads/filet mignon/service with a full open bar for about $63/person, gratuity included, from a caterer that usually does events for the opera, symphony and other performing arts groups. They actually knocked down the price because- and I quote- "We don't have to make dessert." Wha?!? They have no problem serving and boxing cake, either.

Anyone want to get married in Milwaukee? :)

04-26-2007, 01:13 AM
Lafayette- I feel SO silly. I went to my stack of wedding magazines (yikes... I have a really compulsive personality) and saw I had a Bride and Bloom in there. I wholeheartedly agree, they have so many pretty arrangements in there. I am really trying to do a low-budget wedding, but I may have to incorporate some of those ideas. Take care. :)

04-26-2007, 10:57 AM

I enjoy looking at the pictures of real estate in my area. A lot of the picture have leaves on the ground (indication of the October/November time frame) or snow (which could've been a couple times in the past few months but not recent). So houses are definitely sitting.

DH and I are actually pushing off our home buying plans for a couple months longer. Last year, we had a short local honeymoon and we decided that on our first anniversary, we'd take a longer/international trip. Well, we just purchased a vacation package to Antartica for December. So we'll be looking to buy in January or so :)

04-26-2007, 02:53 PM
Hi everyone,

Christine- congratulations on making it official!! I was thinking of doing some of the flowers myself, but I've got some good discounts (and we're not having complicated arrangements at the venue) so I'm going to concentrate on kicking back and enjoying myself for the day. I'm actually going to see the florist tomorrow now, and booked my weddig cake today (chocolate, covered in chocolate curls) which we're cutting before the meal and having as a dessert with a Baileys sauce.

I hear you all on the house prices. Our 2 bed semi (I don't know what square footage it would be, but it's small) in the middle of a town (no land etc) comes in at $400,000 using the currency converter. Unfortunately we don't own it but will be getting back on the property ladder next year, which is going to hurt!

Lafayette- I've done exactly the same as you- we're having the wedding in a private club, which has never done this before (but is very happy to take our money!) and using small local suppliers, who will discuss different ways of doing things so that we get the effect we want and they get to keep their profit margins
I haven't managed to lose any weight either except my Easter weight. I have my last dress tryon before she orders my size on Saturday and really wanted to be down to 159 but am stuck at 161. I think it's a mental thing as it will be another decade of pounds closer to my goal. Willpower push I think.

Good luck with all of your planning!

04-26-2007, 03:05 PM
I enjoy looking at the pictures of real estate in my area. A lot of the picture have leaves on the ground (indication of the October/November time frame) or snow (which could've been a couple times in the past few months but not recent). So houses are definitely sitting.
haha, I have actually seen a home that has the date of their open house in the description, and it is from LAST JUNE :o As I've been looking at homes nearly every day online, I've watched one particular property actually fall from $299,900 to a current price of $249,000 in just a matter of a few months, and it's STILL not sold (which leads me to believe there's something wrong with it, but still)!

I am glad that the market has changed to become a buyers' market, but our mortgage (plus taxes and insurance--full PITI) is still going to be nearly double what we currently pay in rent :dizzy:

As for wedding-related news in my life, we're still trying to figure out if we even want to bother with a big thing or just get hitched and have a family dinner at a restaurant. I guess part of it will depend on how much $$ my parents are willing to help us with, which will depend on when they move and what new jobs they get when they move. They have put an offer in on a house in Va Beach, but their offer is contingent on them selling their house in CT, which hasn't had any offers yet (but has only been on the market for 3 weeks so far)--yes, my parents, my sister and her family, and Jeff and I are ALL moving by the end of this year :dizzy: .

04-26-2007, 08:24 PM
Jill- a price drop that small probably doesn't signal a problem. Even if it does, they would be required by law to disclose it if you ask. I looked at a place that had come down $120k in price ($100k lower than the city tax assessment) and it was just genuinely overvalued. Hang in there!

I started by wedding weight loss a week and a half ago and have lost 6 pounds. I refuse to try on dresses until I weigh less than 140 in shoes. I have never had this much weight to lose so I was astounded when I had lost 5 pounds in the first week but I'm still not back down to my previous highest weight. Last time, I had about 15-20 pounds to lose and was deeply motivated by a college reunion and a friend's wedding- I expected to see a particulary heinous ex at both events and was thrilled when I lost the weight and didn't have to deal with him.

Clareh, good or bad, this last stretch before the big day will probably push you toward your goal! Take care of yourself and it will happen!

Good luck everyone!

04-30-2007, 12:25 PM
We have a reception site picked out! Now that we have the ceremony and reception sites taken care of I feel like we can relax for a bit, everything else will fall together. We already have a florist and photographer we think we’ll likely work with, the reception site does all the catering, next on the agenda will be the dress I suppose.

This is where we’re having the reception:
At first I wasn’t too crazy about the terrace because I thought we’d have to use the ballroom, and I thought it was kind of silly to be at a lakeside facility and not be able to see the lake. Turns out our party is small enough to use the community terrace, which is basically a long room with one wall being glass overlooking the water. Very nice! If anyone is interested you can get a 3D “tour” of the space in flash or quicktime via this link just scroll down to “community terrace”. And the catering menu looks has some good looking vegetarian options. :D

Also, we are moving ahead with the house buying! Very exciting, we’ll be closing June 8. :faint:

04-30-2007, 01:19 PM
Shananigans--congrats on the house! And on picking out a (gorgeous) reception site! Glad to hear things are coming together.

I'm thinking more and more about a destination wedding for us. I know that means that a LOT fewer people will be able to attend, but I think it may be the only way we can have a honeymoon (since we can't afford a honeymoon ourselves, and Jeff's parents are both, hmm, financially unstable). It will be like the wedding and honeymoon wrapped up into one (assuming Jeff and I could stay a few days longer than our family and friends so we'd have a bit of alone time ;) ). My parents are going to have to foot the entire bill, and a destination wedding may actually be a better bargain in the end. But who knows--I'm sure I'll change my mind again in 5 minutes :p

04-30-2007, 03:26 PM
Shan- What exciting times for you! Your reception site looks gorgeous.

Jill- I bet a destination wedding would be really fun, and I'm sure everyone who attended would enjoy it.

We spent the weekend looking at reception/ceremony locations in my hometown. Next we'll look at our "destination" spot, which would be about an hour and a half drive for either family. Planning a wedding in a short time frame is fairly stressful- We need to get invitations out in a little over a month, and we don't even know where we're having it yet! We'll work it out, though. Well, we'd better. Wish us luck!

04-30-2007, 09:21 PM
Shan- Congrats on the reception site! I've attended events in that area of Monona Terrace and it has been gorgoeus every time- even bad weather looks beautiful through that wall of windows!

05-01-2007, 04:19 PM
Shananigans- I've just 'toured' your reception area and it looks amazing!!

Jill- excuse my transatlantic ignorance, but over here there is a trend for honeymoon lists (where rather than buying house things, people contribute to the cost of your honeymoon) We get married in November and can't go away until December so fingers crossed, after we've spent all of our pennies on the reception, we will be able to go for 2 weeks somewhere hot, and our guests will have paid for us to have the experience, which makes it doubly special. We looked at destination weddings but our relatives would kill us!

Christine- you'll be fine. If it wasn't for the fact we are paying for everything ourself and have to save, we could get married tomorrow. My dress would be a bit bigger, that's all!

The dress is now ordered (in a US 10) so there's no taking the eye off the ball for me now- I'm 160 so hope to see a 'new decade' of numbers by the end of the week. I think the last time I've seen 159 was about 10 years ago. I'm looking into BFL but it seems a bit more commitment that I think I can give at the moment, but we'll see.

I think I've decided on flowers (stephanotis and lisianthus for a 'country' feel) and we have a volunteer soprano friend to sing during the ceremony, so it's all coming together now.

05-01-2007, 07:24 PM
Jill- excuse my transatlantic ignorance, but over here there is a trend for honeymoon lists (where rather than buying house things, people contribute to the cost of your honeymoon) We get married in November and can't go away until December so fingers crossed, after we've spent all of our pennies on the reception, we will be able to go for 2 weeks somewhere hot, and our guests will have paid for us to have the experience, which makes it doubly special. We looked at destination weddings but our relatives would kill us!
A honeymoon list would be fine if we didn't really need other things more (like a new microwave, new dishes, new silverware, new small kitchen appliances, etc.), but being young and broke, we really need those things more than we need a brief trip. Especially with buying a home in the fall (our monthly mortgage will be roughly DOUBLE what we are currently paying in rent)--we won't have a penney to spare for anything other than our bills, let alone anything to actually put IN the home :dizzy:

Also, for us, because our family and friends are so spread out geographically, there is no location to which EVERYONE would actually be able to attend without travel arrangements, so a destination wedding wouldn't really be much different for most of our guests :^:

05-03-2007, 01:37 PM
Hi ladies! We're back! I don't have a ton of time (unpacking/gift unwrapping/work catchup has me going crazy) but I wanted to show you the one picture I've gotten back from the photographer. I was taking group pics at the Claremont hotel in Berkeley, and there was a birthday party next door with all of these little girls. They RAN over to me all wide eyed, and one of them said "are you the BRIDE?". Then they handed me a bunch of balloons. I love, love, love this picture.

Oh, and I'm not changing my ticker until I've had some time to push water/sodium out with lots of water for a few days, but the scale isn't good. I am sort of OK with it, though - I mean, I get to honeymoon once, and I didn't go crazy, but I did have some AMAZING food. Did lots of walking and exercise, so we'll see where I finally settle out scale-wise.

05-03-2007, 02:38 PM
Welcome back mandalinn! Hope your wedding and honeymoon was all you dreamed.

That picture is adorable. Can’t wait to hear all the details when you have time!

05-03-2007, 10:18 PM
Love the pic... so beautiful! Really great flowers. Happy catching up on everything, looking forward to hearing about it all!

05-04-2007, 04:59 AM
You look beautiful!! Can't wait to hear the story

05-04-2007, 09:46 AM
Aww, Mandalinn, that's so adorable!

05-08-2007, 11:05 PM
Awesome story, pictures and flowers! You look awesome!

I know you're probably "wedding-ed out" by this point, but what are the white flowers with the roses?

05-09-2007, 12:18 AM
The white flower is a sort of formed a "base" for the arrangement into which the other flowers were placed.

05-09-2007, 06:43 AM
Mandalinn, so glad the stress is over for you and you survived and had fun! All I could think of when looking at that picture with the little girls (besides how FABULOUS you looked ;) ) was, "My GOD, look at how those little girls are dressed...I never had a birthday party like THAT when I was little!" :dizzy: Heck, their little dresses probably cost more than my entire wardrobe combined when I Was that age :p

I'm moving ahead with the idea of a destination wedding. The trick now is to find the destination. I don't want it to get too expensive, so we're not hauling off to Australia (which would be my #1 choice--to be with the penguins on the beach :D ) or the Mediterranean or anything like that. I don't really want to go anyplace just for the beaches--I require about an SPF 500 to be in the sun for more than 5 minutes at a time :cool: Although we would LOVE a place with hammocks to relax in. I'm thinking of maybe someplace in the mountains or something on the coast of New England or something. We don't drink nor gamble, so Vegas is out (ha, we went to Atlantic City once, and all we did was shop and eat). Who knows...plenty of time to keep talking myself in circles :D

05-09-2007, 02:54 PM
Hello all!

Not sure if I mentioned that I got my dress a couple weeks ago, but couldn't really tell how well or if it fit as I couldn't really get myself totally into it.

Well, today my friend came home with me for lunch, and helped me put it on. The good news is that not only does it fit, it's a smidge big! I've got about 1/2" extra around my rib cage (most fitted part).

So, I don't need to worry about stressing myself out about the dress not fitting, and in fact, I'm hoping I will actually have to have it made a bit smaller for me before the big day!

How soon before a wedding do you usually do your final fitting?

05-09-2007, 03:03 PM
Jill, penguins would be awesome. When I go to Antarctica, I'm going to try to sneak one back with me.... I noticed there are some interesting "mountain" weddings in various places including NC and NY. I really want to visit the Adirondacks in NY, the pictures look pretty cool.

05-09-2007, 03:07 PM
Cindy, congrats on the dress!

Mandalinn, my florist suggested that and I just couldn't picture it. That looks great- I think I may have to go back and change my order!

I have officially gotten over the dieter's worst part of the wedding planning: I picked the hors d'oeuvres, salad, dinner and cake! Thank God, too, because I haven't lost any weight in almost three weeks! I felt like I was munching salads all day so I could go pig out at these tastings (which I did!). Now, I just have to get gorgeous so I can eat the meal guilt-free!

How's everyone else doing?

05-09-2007, 03:22 PM
Lafayette - my partner is a floral designer, and she did the designs (not the construction, but the designs) for all of our flowers, so we requested lots and lots of detail photos. I will try to get you some more bouquet pics as they become available so you can get a better idea what it looks like. For now, look at this (crappy quality) pic that shows what this concept looks like on a centerpiece:

For those of you who want to see photos (Warning - they messed up the photo CDs on the table cameras so I have to get them re-done, but you can get an idea of the pictures here. At least the prints are ok!)

Table Cameras from wedding:

Our digital cam pics from the wedding and honeymoon:

Sorry for the high photo time to sort through and post links to all the good ones individually. :-(

Warning: Extremely long wedding summary below!

OK, so the wedding was gorgeous. It was POURING, of course, but we had a plan for that and it all worked out ok. I think we actually managed to pull off a wedding where everyone had a good time, which is amazing…although we did have a couple of people get seriously out-of-control drunk, which was a bit of a bummer because they got inappropriate with some of my family. We have a ton of wine in the apartment now, all the leftover bottles, and we’re trying to share the wealth with friends as much as we can because we can’t store it all! The food and wine were really good and I think everyone had a blast. Sarah and I wrote our vows independently, but they basically said the same thing, which was funny…essentially, we said that things never go as planned, and that is ok because we are together…which is really true. It was absolutely gorgeous and the arch that my dad built for us was amazing…so special. It was great to see everyone, particularly Sarah’s best friend Alicia who lives in DC and Anthony, who came out from Taiwan.

((ok, so this is poached from a letter to a friend. Elena and Chris = my sister and her fiance, Dean = Sarah's dad))

We were just so amazed at how wonderful everyone was. Elena and Chris REALLY made magic happen for the whole thing…taking care of all kinds of details so I wouldn’t have to. We have a lot to live up to for her wedding in July! Since we had to move inside for the ceremony, Chris drove all the way down the hill to find us firewood in the pouring rain…they took care of packing up all the stuff, making sure everything was in place, making sure we didn’t have to worry about details, and etc…it was really, really amazing. Elena gave a toast that said how crappy it was to grow up so close in age, but how great it is now to have planned our weddings at the same time, it was really sweet. Dean and my dad also gave toasts that were great (Dean essentially talked about how he not only got me in the family, he also got my entire family, and went on for a bit about how great they are). We danced and had fun.

Afterward we took a limo over to the hotel where Sarah proposed…what was great was that we ended up in the exact same room, which was so special. Then we boarded the ship on Sunday, and it was AMAZING. We just relaxed and enjoyed…my sister got us a fabulous honeymoon package for the boat, so we had lots of special perks (champagne, really plush robes, chocolate covered strawberries, facials…). We also got a really relaxing couples massage. The ports were great…we took a Mexican cooking class in Acapulco that redeemed the city (the time we were on our own was really sort of sketchy…the people are really aggressive and it has aged from being a nice resort to a dirty, run down version of its previous self. The other cities, though, were amazing. Our favorite was probably Ixtapa/Zihuatenejo…the people were so friendly and it was very pretty, plus the food was amazing. We had the best fajitas of our lives...I am drooling just thinking about them. In Puerto Vallarta, we went horseback riding, which was really cool. After we had ridden out to a river, we got to swim on horseback. It was definitely a once in a lifetime experience. Then we just walked around in Cabo. It is a touristy town, but still nice, and we had another great meal. Then back on the boat for another couple of days at sea before we had to finally go back to real life. It was really a once-in-a-lifetime, great experience. I put on a few pounds, but I’m absolutely 100% convinced it was worth it…where else can you have room service bring you hot tea and chocolate chip cookies before bed every night?

05-09-2007, 03:28 PM
I am stressing out. The reason to plan a wedding a year in advance is to be able to book a place to be married, I suppose. Every place we want to get married seems to be booked already. I know we'll figure something out, but it has me down. We may have to opt for Friday or Sunday instead, in order to have a place to get married. There are advantages and disadvantages to either day. Opinions? If you had to pick a Friday or Sunday, which would you prefer?

05-09-2007, 03:37 PM

We posted at the same time- everything sounds like it was wonderful! I am so happy for you! And love the flowers, I may have to steal some ideas!

05-09-2007, 03:37 PM
I'd probably do a Sunday, and start it a bit earlier so it can end at a reasonable hour (10 or 11pm), or even do an afternoon. That way, people still have ample time both to get ready (the problem with a Friday evening is that people don't have getting ready time after work unless they get off early) and to get to work the next day.

Sorry you're having such trouble finding an available spot. I know how frustrating that can be...

05-09-2007, 03:50 PM
I had a Sunday wedding which I planned on purpose. It gave me an extra weekend day to get everything ready plus my guests and I didn't have to drive in commuter traffic to go to the pre wedding dinner. It also allowed travelling guests to arrive on Saturday if they wanted.

Cons of a Sunday wedding - The place I had my hair done had later Sunday hours than Saturday and some places were even closed on Sunday. My florist was officially closed on Sunday but I told them in advance and they had someone available to deliver my flowers and even gave me a cell phone number as a contact. I don't think it would be too different if you had a specific hairdresser you wanted in that they would be willing to accomodate a Sunday if you let them know in advance.

If you are having it at a church, you might have to work around their hours.

Rock Chalk Chick
05-09-2007, 04:14 PM
Hello girls!

I was pointed to this thread from a panic I posted in the general support - my guy finally made me pin down a date this weekend and I'm now having to progress to full-on wedding planning. I'm not much of a wedding "type" - if I had my way, I'd just have a nice casual barbecue or something after a very small ceremony, but my guy is really set on having a big fancy affair!

So, in trying to figure out just how much this ordeal is going to cost us, I stumbled across a wedding day "countdown" on theknot - 499 days from now to Sept 20 '08! That seems like both a heck of a long time and a very very short time to get things under way as far as weight goes!

I'm not really doing anything as far as planning just yet, since I'm in the middle of finishing up my masters thesis and just don't have enough time to do what needs to be done, let alone wedding stuff that I can't really handle yet. I'm moving down to Kansas City in July once I finish my degree, and we'll do the wedding down there, too - not a whole lot of chance to check out locations when I'm 300 miles away and too busy to visit!

Anyhow, looking forward to getting to know you all, and sharing support as we go through this all together!

05-10-2007, 01:59 PM
mandalinn - Your cake was gorgeous! Love the orchids. Your centerpieces and lucky bamboo look great too, your hard work putting those together paid off. Looks like your honeymoon was a blast! You both look so gorgeous and happy. Those pictures of hoarse swimming, hehe, I didn’t even know there was such a thing. Once in a lifetime experience for sure. BTW, I would re-dub “Sarah's skanky swimsuit”, more like “Sarah’s HOT Swimsuit” :flame:! Hope you don’t mind my saying so. I’ve always wanted to wear plunging necklines, too bad my body doesn’t agree with me! :lol:

Loved looking at all those pictures, sometimes I browse on for ideas for flowers and things, it really helps me see what options are out there and visualize. I just remembered that I had put together a slideshow from my sister’s wedding last October, if any of you are planning a fall wedding you might want to peek, I thought her choice in flowers/colors was lovely.

Christine – Sorry you are finding places are filled up so far in advance. My first choice reception site was taken, but I like what we ended up with just as much, even if it doesn’t have the sentimental/nostalgic value. nelie, good points about the Sunday stuff, didn’t even think about the issue of some vendors not being open, church schedules, etc. We are having our wedding on a Sunday early afternoon, partly because many of our guests would consider a Saturday (Shabbat) wedding improper. But the following day is Memorial Day, so that should help the traveling folks a bit.

RCC – Glad to see you ‘round these parts.

Cindy – WTG on the dress. I don’t know about when to get the final fitting, I would talk to your tailor/seamstress. They should know what the norm is.

05-14-2007, 05:16 PM
My fiance called our first choice place today, and it looks like we are going to make it work out for a late Sunday morning wedding. It sounds very good, and I will be so happy when we call and confirm it all in the next few days. It is a beautiful stone amphitheater nestled in the woods. Then our guests will walk back up the hill to a state park lodge with a dining room overlooking a lawn. We are going to have a lunch reception, which will be cheaper than dinner of course, and still really cute I think. I am really relieved that it is all coming together.

05-16-2007, 12:32 PM
Well I am new to this board and I am getting married on April 5, 2008. My goal is to lose 60 lbs. before my wedding. I believe we are going to be getting married in las vegas. I am just so happy that I can find a place to chat with other brides.

05-16-2007, 12:35 PM
All right, I had my first day of dress shopping yesterday! The general report:

1) I usually wear dark or muted colors, and white isn't exactly slimming, so I was afraid I'd put on a big white dress and see Moby Dick staring back out of the mirror at me. This didn't happen...not even in the clandestine camera phone picture I saw later. I'm happy. :)

2) I went to an outlet first, figuring they'd have a wide selection at reasonable why is it that every single dress they stocked seemed to be made of that same industrial-strength heavy polyester canvas? Sure, you can stick some chiffon on the outside to make it look light and airy, but I want a dress that actually *is* light and airy.

2.1) Outlets are supposed to be less expensive, right? So why were all the dresses in the five to seven hundred dollar range? It's not like they were made out of nice material, or that the quality was particularly good. (Yes, the dresses I tried on have surely been tried on many times, but I expect a dress that costs so much to be able to survive multiple tryings on without having giant dangling threads of beads and sequins.) I really wasn't very satisfied with my experience.

3) On the way home I tried stepping in to a tiny little shop I walk by often...I figured it's small, so I'll only have to try on five or six dresses before I decide they have nothing. ;) So I walked inside, and a tiny woman with an accent asked me my size and sleeve preference, then promptly pulled a dress off the rack (a size smaller than I'd told her, interestingly enough) and handed it to me to try on. It had everything I've been looking for, fit like a dream, and the price is only $356 ($306 if I pay up-front, which I'm sure I will) and includes free alterations. I'm going to try a couple more stores tomorrow, but I somehow doubt I'll find anything else so perfect.

So the moral of this story? Don't be afraid to search different places. That, and if you find the right shape, your dress doesn't have to add twenty pounds.

05-16-2007, 03:02 PM
Sunshine- a Vegas wedding! That's awesome! I'm speaking from the middle of planning the classic "register only for for china, crystal and silver" country club wedding, complete with valets. Vegas sounds perfect! Welcome!

I'm not so convinced I won't look like Moby Dick... I've decided to delay trying on dresses until the last possible moment- exactly six months before the wedding. That way, I can't convince myself it will look better when I've dropped the weight and purchase something that will make me look like I've tried to safety-pin my fat a$$ into the Michelin man costume! LOL How's that for "love yourself" motivation?

05-16-2007, 03:14 PM
Welcome Sunshine!

Congrats on the dress shopping honeydew - unfortunately my dress weighs a ton it seems, due to all the beading on the bodice - hopefully it doesn't look like it adds a ton!

Hey gals - my latest stress out is about tuxes (yes, I'm doing *everything*!)

We have 4 groomsmen in Albany, NY, and one in St.Louis, MO. Albany has NO chain tux stores. So, my question is whether or not local stores all carry the same stuff, like the bridesmaid stuff, or if I should try to find the nearest chain near Albany, since St.Louis has several.

05-16-2007, 03:28 PM
I know I am very excited about my wedding!! I wish we could plan something big, but my mom is putting a damper on everything and trying to control my wedding. It is such a long story!!

I bought my wedding dress two weeks after I got engaged because I thought that David's Bridal sale was only lasting two weeks. It ended up lasting 4 months, dumb me, but my dress is so beautiful!! I agree with you on pinning yourself in the dress. I weight 220 right now and my dress is a 20. I hope that I still fit into it when I lose the weight. I have already talked to David's Bridal and they said that I couldnt return it for any reason. I was kinda sad because if I lost weight I dont know what I would do with my dress if it didnt fit. I guess I should have waited. It probably would have been a better idea.

When is your wedding??

05-16-2007, 03:39 PM
BfL Cat - you're going to want to get them to a chain if you want them to match...especially if you are doing a colored vest or similar and want them all to be the same color. HOWEVER - we did have one male attendant (he lives in Taiwan) get measured according to the chain store's form (they will give you one if you ask), then submitted his measurements to the store and picked up for him. It worked out fine (but a word of caution...the pants seemed to run big for a few of our guys, so bring safety pins in case...this saved us from having too big tux pants).

05-16-2007, 08:38 PM
Thanks mandalinn - we may have to go the measurements route for some of the guys. I do want colored vests that coordinate somehow with my bridesmaid dresses. Ties as well. Speaking of which, I really like the look of a regular tie, as opposed to a bow tie - that's a change since back in my college days when the groomsmen all wore bow ties. DF likes it as well, amazingly enough, since he is such a traditionalist.

Anyone know where I can get Jelly Bellys cheap? $5/pound or less is what I'm looking for. They are part of my favors - I know this is going to sound corny, but I ordered some of those "perfect pear (pair)" candles and then I'm going to have clear boxes with juicy pear flavor Jelly Bellys to go with. I love anything fruit related - fabrics, prints, paintings, dish patterns,... so this was right up my alley when I saw them. I think I'll have different varieties of pear names for the tables, and I'm going to have the florist do a cornucopia-type centerpiece for the head table, incorporating pears, apples and small gourd/pumpkins.

Along those same lines, I may have pear martinis at the bar - haven't tried one yet, so may change my mind once I do - we'll have to see.

Bridesmaid dress shopping this weekend - both bridesmaids will be in town, along with my Mom, so wish us luck. I'm really hoping to find something in a yellow/gold tone that we like, or burnt orange/cinnamon. Red could work as well if the right shade - I really want to stay with Fall/harvest colors.

05-16-2007, 09:08 PM
We had regular ties. It looked really sharp.

Depending on your colors, you might also consider putting your groomsmen in black shirts. We did, and could NOT have been happier with how it looked. Of course, your fiance might not go for this if he is a traditionalist on the attire, but it did look really nice.

05-16-2007, 10:26 PM
David's Bridal is evil bridezilla fodder. That place encourages you to freak out so you spend tons of money on their solution. They should really just offer you their special kool-aid when you first walk in the door!

My wedding is March 29, 2008, and I plan to pick out the dress in October 2007, six months before the wedding and when I'll be at my goal! If it works for Martha Stewart, it'll work for me! And because I am, in fact, much more OCD than this post lets on, I do have a seamstress waiting in the wings who will make me a dress from scratch if I don't find what I want... ;)

Mandalinn had her dress altered quite a bit, I think, and her pictures look beautiful.

Mothers are in a league of their own when it comes to weddings, aren't they? I feel your pain and I am just no longer discussing the subject with my mother because I've had enough!!!

05-16-2007, 11:41 PM
Yes I totally agree with you. I bought my dress on the first visit to Davids Bridal. The dress that I really wanted was on the girl next to me and that was the only one that they had in that size. Man was I really sad and mad. I did find the most beautiful dress, but I am just worried that I wont find anything.

Forgive me if I am going off a little bit, I need some advice. I was talking to my FH about wedding stuff tonight and I was telling him that I have the wedding itch, baby itch and buying the house itch. I just wanted it all to happen now. I am tired of waiting. Do you think that I am going crazy?? I just want all of this to be over and all I want for us to start our life together. Granted my FH lives in California and wont be here until june 20th, he is moving his parents from California to Indiana. I moved here in Dec when I got my job. Just to give you some history on why I am asking this question!!! Sorry for going off just needing some advice!!

Yes MOM'S are MOMZILLA'S and it is a long story to get into mine, so I will just leave it at that!!! :)

05-17-2007, 06:45 AM
Sunshine--I lmpw what you mean about "itchin'" for everything all at once! I think a lot of goes through that at some point to some extent. I was itchin' for a baby before we even got engaged (stupid TLC and Discovery baby shows :p ), but then my sister had one, so I get to play with her all the time ;) All these urges happen, but you just have to remind yourself that doing EVERYTHING all at once is a whole lot of stress, and no one needs that! Anyone will tell you that moving + wedding planning is a tough combo--not that it can't be done, but that it's a LOT to deal with all at once--so adding trying/pregnancy/baby into the mix, man, I couldn't ven imagine when you'd have ANY time to do anything for yourself!

I guess my suggestion is just to realize that each of these things is a BIG thing and deserves its own time for you to focus and make sure it happens perfectly. Jeff and I are purposely waiting to start planning our wedding until after we move in the fall. We know that moving will take up a LOT of our time--researching, finding a good realtor, finding just the right financing, comparing lots of features, determining the order of our priorities, figuring out our budget/finances, going to look at homes, deciding which one we want, deciding how much to offer vs. asking price, finding a good home inspector...the list seems to go on forever. No need to add "planning a wedding" to that list :dizzy: Of course, I think about our wedding and what we want to do and whatnot, but actually planning will come later. We haven't even set a date yet (or picked a location within the country or picked a general season/time of year...).

05-17-2007, 08:51 AM
Jill, your point about waiting so that you can plan each stage was timely! I would love to have everything done and would have if my fiance hadn't become so involved in the planning. He has slowed me down but I know the whole event will truly be "ours" so it is worth it.

I wanted the wedding planned ASAP (still kinda do) but I do events professionally and knew that dinner for 180-200 would be much easier than my usual luncheons for 500-600, especially if I just paced it out and checked off the arangements. I guess in that respect, I am not the typical bride! I would love to have the whole house perfect, too, but I'm definitely pacing myself there!

As for the David's Bridal dress, I'm not sure what alterations cost but taking the dress to a consignment shop and buying the one you love in a smaller size may be worth considering both for finaces and just for you. Just keep momzilla at home... I felt guilty about excluding my mom but it makes things so much easier. Is this possible for you Sunshine?

05-17-2007, 09:11 AM
Thanks jillybean720 and Lafayette for the words of encouragement. See and I watch the damn discovery and baby story shows. Maybe that should be an answer to not put myself through that, so maybe I wont think about it. I live with my SIL and BIL and they have a 17 month old godson. We adore each other but it is still not the same as having one of your own. You know. I know that one day we will be able to have a family, but I know that I need to wait till all the other big moments have taken place and we have our wedding and our house, before our family.

As for the momzilla she lives in California. I put her to a test about a weekd ago and asked her if she would come to Indiana instead of all of us flying to Vegas. She said no and no one else from your family would come, you are so SELFISH. I am just glad that she is in another state right now because she would be driving me nuts. She hasnt even offered to help out either, but at this point I think it is safe to keep her out of the mix right now!! :)

05-17-2007, 09:25 AM
Oh, boy! My mother has given me the selfish lecture, and the self-centered lecture, and the spoiled little brat lecture... but I've been listening to that all my life so, in the interest of not increasing the cost of this wedding by adding therapy bills, I have stopped telling her anything about the wedding.

I've had family vehemently oppose my dream of a wedding in Ireland with only our closest friends and family, repeatedly insist that the country club was the ONLY venue worthy of consideration for the reception, insist that children MUST be included, insist that people I have never even met be included on the guest list... I consider each of them to have BLOWN THEIR WAD. They are no longer allowed any say in anything. Period. Amen. Each person gets one request. If they didn't realize it, then that is not my fault.

As a result of keeping them all happy (big surprise- several were bridezillas at their own weddings and would now like to play the same role in mine), some of my dearest friends, who live in Europe, will not be able to attend the wedding because travel to Milwaukee is a damn sight more expensive than Ireland. Instead, Bob and his wife whose name no one can ever remember will be attending. Yippee!

So much of the wedding stuff strikes me as doing whatever keeps the peace and managing to keep the things that are really important to you. For me, it's my fiance and the fact that, at the end of the day, we will be married. Anything else is just not that big a deal, I guess! Um, maybe we should disregard my previous rant then ;)

05-17-2007, 11:21 AM
No I wouldnt disregard anything. I just need that motivation to help with my mom.

On a better note I am just so excited to be getting married! I cant wait!!

05-17-2007, 03:17 PM
Welcome Sunshine!

I’ve had a bad experience almost every time I’ve stepped into David’s Bridal. I doubt I will go there for my own dress shopping. DF’s mother has offered to go dress shopping with me when she’s in town next month helping us close on our townhouse (she’s a lawyer and will serve as our legal representation, for free!). I think it’ll be too early to order anything, but it will be nice to start getting an idea of what I might like and what looks good.

DF came across a fun idea for table names that I think we’ll use. You name each table after a place in the city the wedding is in and put a picture of yourselves at that location on each table. We both love Madison and were able to easily come up with a list of places of significance to us so I think we’ll end up doing it.

Our contract is final with the Monona Terrace, so glad we have our ceremony and reception sites all taken care of.

Our friends that are getting married in Madison on Sept. 2 will be here Thurs and Fri next week to meet with their caterer and bakery for taste testing. Sadly I will be at work during those times. Ah well, guess I’ll just have to look on the bright side that I’m being spared the calories, right? ;) It will be nice to spend some time with them anyway.

05-18-2007, 09:06 AM
Shan- we are thinking of naming the tables after Irish pubs but I have some elderly guests who, while they're no strangers to the drink, would be very confused. I have this amusing image of a group of people turning their walkers and heading off to Paddy's for the reception... I think we'll do numbers and drinking establishments, just in case!

Does anyone have any David's Bridal survival tips? I have bridesmaids all over the place (like Europe) and would like to get the dresses there because it would simplify the measurements, purchasing, etc. Seriously, the bridal Barbie was TOO MUCH!

05-18-2007, 12:22 PM
Lafayette – When I ordered my bridesmaid separates for my sister’s wedding through David’s Bridal it wasn’t too bad since my sis sent me the item numbers and color of the items to order. All I did was go to the store to try on samples to find my size, paid, and then picked up a few months later. I remember it taking an awfully long time to get the items (4 months maybe?) so I would suggest getting in touch with them to get a time estimate if you’re going to go through DB. So, if you can find what you want online and go to the store knowing exactly what you want that will help. In my experience the trouble starts when the sales staff tries to “help” you make decisions or select things for you, if you can bypass that all together it really helps. Good luck!

05-18-2007, 12:51 PM
I did have my dress altered quite a bit...from a size 18 to a size 10 (regular sizes, not bridal sizes), as well as completely changing the dress back (from a zipper to a yummy corsetback), so it ended up being one-of-a-kind despite being originally purchased at David's. One word of advice - the David's alterations people not only do a shoddy job, but they won't do -any- design changes on the dresses other than adding the pre-fab "sleeves" on. If you find another alterations specialist, they are almost guaranteed to take better care of you, for very little extra money.

05-18-2007, 01:45 PM
I've got a stupid question that's been puzzling me for a while, so here goes...what's with all the open-toe bridal shoes? I always thought that stockings were part of the super-traditional bridal attire (hence the garter), but sandals are for bare feet. Do a lot of brides not wear hose? Do some manufacturers make toeless hose or something? Wouldn't they ride around on your feet, making the end of the stocking difficult to hide under strappier shoes? I can't belive I spent three years living in a girls' dorm and have no answer for this.

05-18-2007, 01:51 PM
I didn't wear hose. Your legs are buried under piles of dress, usually, so there is no need, and honestly, it gets kind of sweaty under there.

Oh, for the girls currently trying on dresses, coat yourself in baby powder from neck to feet next time. Rub it in nicely - it prevents that whole "I am sweaty and sticky under this giant freaking petticoat/slip thing" issue that really irritated me during the dress try-on process.

05-19-2007, 10:07 AM
I agree Mandalinn82. I was uncomfortable the whole time. I was sweating and uncomfortable the whole time. To make it worse I had a pimple on my back that everyone could see and it was so red. Might I add very embarrasing!! But my SIL was great, she helped me the whole time try on like 6 different dresses. There was a family of woman over the other side of where you come out and they were helping me also to pick the right dress. When I cam out in the one that I liked they all gasped, that really made me feel good!! I love my dress. Hopefully I can upload a picture soon and show you!! :)

05-19-2007, 10:33 AM
Thanks for the tips! I'll be the girl in the Shower to Shower...

It is now acceptable to wear hose with peep-toed shoes and many have decided that applies to open-toed shoes as well. (Living in the Midwest, I have become an expert on fashion don'ts and their rationales!)

I just think it looks tacky and, yes, they do sell pantyhose with openings for your toes. To keep them from just sliding up your legs, there are two openings- one for your big toe and one for the other four, which creates a little thong.

If you want the bare leg look but want the support of pantyhose, several places sell pantyhose styled like leggings. They even have varying lengths to accomodate a shorter skirt or the long walking shorts that are popular right now. I found a great brand at Target (called something like "Solutions").

Thanks to you guys, I am a little more excited about the dress... I'm sure I'll get more excited as I lose the weight!

05-19-2007, 01:50 PM
Sunshine - I had a serious back pimple issue as well! There is a really great over the counter treatment that cleared it up for me - fairly inexpensive, and SO worth it not to have a giant red splotch on the wedding day. It completely cleared my back up (and I get sports bra/sweat acne on my back constantly) in 3-4 weeks. Its called Natures Cure Body Acne Spray. Don't bother with the Nature's Cure pills...waste of money...but the spray is salicylic acid and it -really- works. I didn't bring it on the honeymoon, but my back stayed clear for the two weeks after the wedding anyway.

05-21-2007, 04:53 PM
Well for once my mother is not acting like a MOMZILLA. She has offered to pay for our honeymoon, which I am super duper excited about. We are planning on going Hawaii, and wanted to know if anyone has any recommendations. My mom was saying something around $1000.00. So I wasnt sure what to do? Any advice that would be great.

05-21-2007, 05:10 PM
That's awesome! They have their moments, don't they?

I'm not sure what a trip to Hawaii would cost. I would call a travel agent who can give you some pricing and then you can always try to get a better price on one of the online sites.

We haven't really gotten that far in our planning yet. All I know is I want to go to a non-English speaking country, preferably in Europe, where bikini tops are optional ;)

05-22-2007, 09:26 AM
LOL Lafayette you are so funny!! I wish I had the body for it to be optional. I am working on it so that is the good thing. I was just so surprised that she called me out of the blue to do it. I was really excited. I have been frantically looking like crazy for places, but I still need to plan my wedding also. FH will be here for good in 3 weeks from California I am so excited.

05-22-2007, 10:05 AM
Sunshine, did your mom mean $1000 total or per person? If memory serves, Hawaii can be quite expensive, although I suppose it depends on how long you stay. I'm sorry I don't recall where you live exactly, but I think the flight alone might run a few hundred dollars per person each way. But how awesome of her to offer up some honeymoon funding!!

I haven't talked to my aprents specifically about financial agendas yet. They are currently in a crunch because they are closing on a new home near my sister in Va Beach on June 30, but they haven't had any offers on their house in CT yet, so if they don't sell their house before closing on the new one, they're going to get hit with double mortgage payments :o So yeah, now is not the time for me to ask about wedding money :dizzy: They did pay for my sister's first wedding and even for the reception in CT after her second wedding, so I know they will do what they can. Thankfully, neither of us wants a big traditional wedding, so we'll hopefully be a bit cheaper than the typical wedding.

05-22-2007, 11:05 AM
The most stressful time of our wedding planning was before either set of parents had "disclosed" the amount they wanted to contribute. I knew my parents were struggling and considering early forced retirement because of my dad's health and I didn't want to make them feel they had to pay for a wedding, too.

It was hard to listen to my mother's suggestions/demands and not to scream because one was more expensive than the other but they hadn't committed any money. Starting the planning process with no cash made us look at what was really important to us and consider a guest list of who was really important to us.

In a way, I'm very grateful for that time, even though I was stressed to death! In the end, it all worked out because we found a way to pay for everything ourselves and the money they offered became the bonus fund that allowed us to upgrade the venue, bar, etc.

BTW I don't have the body yet and, unless they can reverse the Michael Jackson technology, I will never have the skin tone! It's little incentives like these that help to keep my fiance from encouraging me to exercise by walking to the custard stand and to have a huge dessert every time we sit down for a meal! Whatever works!!! Lingerie is also a wonderful encouraging option... I promised him something new for every five pounds and I'm sure it will make me feel better about myself, too!

05-22-2007, 12:04 PM
Sunshine – How exciting about the honeymoon. I haven’t really thought too extensively about the honeymoon, we may not take it immediately after the wedding depending on other things on our schedule. I would be happy with a tropical beach and frosty drinks with little umbrellas in them, anywhere I can find that I’m happy. I’d like to go somewhere where I could scuba dive as well, always wanted to try that.

Mandalinn – Thanks for the dress shopping advice! I’ll be sure to powder up before hand. I’d really like to find a lighter gown, but it seems like those are few and far between. If it were up to me I’d show up in a simple white sundress, unfortunately that doesn’t match the formality of the tux my df is set on. ;)

05-22-2007, 02:32 PM
I know I am really excited about the honey moon and my wedding. Well I am having my wedding in las vegas and we are going to be flying out the following Monday after the wedding which is April 7th 2008. We are getting married on Saturday April 5, 2008. Our goal right now is to buy a house and save money for our wedding which is hard but i know that i could do it.

05-22-2007, 03:56 PM
Shan- have you looked at some of the "destination" gowns? Sandals resort actually has a line of 5 wedding dresses that are advertised as being lightweight. There were designed by Vivian Dessy Diamond of The Dessy Group. They are very pretty and I'm sure you could find something that would look sharp with a tux- it might just be a matter of pairing it with more traditional accessories like pearls.

Good luck!

05-23-2007, 10:08 PM
Time to cut the guest list... Hard to decide who to cut! We want it smaller and more intimate, but there are people who have been important to me that I would like to invite. Sigh... I'm sure it will turn out ok :)

05-24-2007, 08:51 AM
Oh, boy! They recommend cutting work folks first, then guests of singles. No matter how you do it, it can get tricky.

You may want to start over with a fresh list and just put down the people you really want there. It made our decision to cut some of the obligation invites very easy- not as easy to sell to the parents, but very easy nonetheless!

Good luck!

05-24-2007, 12:45 PM
That is what was hard for us because we wanted all of our family and friends there, but we are getting married in Las Vegas and we had to cut down our list from 50 to 30 because of the price of food. We have a budget of $3500.00 and we can't go over. So I sympathize with you on who to cut out!!

05-24-2007, 12:48 PM
That was the one wedding-related hassle we didn't have to deal with. I don't know if it was the gay thing (because that eliminated most of my dad's side of the family for religious reasons) or the fact that both our sets of parents are VERY low key and didn't have a list of people they wanted invited, but we actually got to -add- people after our original list. It sounds like a nightmare! I can't imagine having to cut any of the people we invited...I sympathize!

05-24-2007, 01:07 PM
Yikes--chopping the list! We haven't even made a list yet since we still don't know what we're doing (I give it a good 6 months before we finally make ANY sort of decision :dizzy: ), but I know if we end up doing a destination wedding, the guest list will have to be VERY short :o

05-25-2007, 01:49 AM
We found that we added "obligation" invites based on what we thought our parents would request in addition to who we thought would "expect" an invite. I had a friend reassure me that an invitation to a wedding truly is and should be an honor.

I based my revised list on who I really wanted there- the people I simply could not envision getting married without- and then went back to the longer original and cut every person I would not want to have interrupt me while I was talking to the people on the revised list. For example, I would not want one of my fiance's co-workers, whom I have never met, to decide to introduce himself/herself to me while I am talking to our international guests or my 93-year-old grandmother.

Mandalinn- I'm sorry to hear about your dad's side of the family! I can't tell you how many times I've wanted to scream, "Why can't we all just get along?" Reading that was one of them!

05-25-2007, 02:14 AM
Mandalinn- I'm sorry to hear about your dad's side of the family! I can't tell you how many times I've wanted to scream, "Why can't we all just get along?" Reading that was one of them!

You know, I got myself to a point where I basically said "I only want people to be there who are there to celebrate my union" - I didn't want people to come because it was a novelty, or because they felt obligated. We ended up with a mix of people who all wanted to be there because they were happy for us, which was just where we wanted to be. And everyone has a right to their opinion...not inviting them let me keep that negativity away from my day. It doesn't make them bad people, it makes them people who don't understand and/or come from a different perspective, and thats fine...just not what I wanted on that particular day.

Now family functions, thats another matter. I had to practice my responses before last Thanksgiving..."my life is not a topic of debate". Oy.

05-25-2007, 12:48 PM
You all have the right idea about the guest list I think, ultimately it should be about who matters to you and who you want to share that day with.

My sister recently sent me her master list from her wedding to help me make my own. I’ll probably invite fewer relatives than she did. There are just a few that I don’t know too well that I would invite because I know my grandma will enjoy seeing them. Her health is not too good (she suffered a stroke about a year ago and has partial paralyzation) and I know she’d really enjoy getting a chance to see some of her cousins, brother-in-law, etc. so I’ll send invites to them. A lot of them are also older and have issues that would make travel difficult so I don’t know if many would actually be able to come, but I will send them an invite at least.

Thanks for the tip about the destination wedding gowns. I looked at the ones on the sandals website, I do like some of the styles but they are all rather slim-fitting and look like they’re made of clingy fabric, not exactly what I need to flatter my figure. I’m a shorter full hour-glass, even if I lose a substantial amount of weight that will be the case so I’m thinking I need something that accentuates the smallest part of my waist, fuller A-line skirt, and minimizes the boobs, and draws attention away from my upper arms. Mighty lot to ask of a dress I know! I think I just have to try lots on, I believe I will know when I find “the one”.

05-25-2007, 06:40 PM
Mandalinn- great attitude!

A rift has slowly developed on one side of my family that doesn't have any immediately identifiable source. I refer to our relationship as "estranged but the 'e' is silent" because I honestly don't think anyone can explain why we just don't talk to each other. It was hard to decide that the day would be about our wedding, not some attempt at fostering family unity, but I immediately felt better when I just decided to not invite them.

Shan- I found a dress style in a European catalog that is shirred at the waist and was surprised to see it at David's Bridal, of all places. It will be the style of my bridesmaids' dresses and the most likely style of my dress, too. It is incredible flattering on everyone who has tried it on. Even right now, while I have a belly (yuck!), it looks pretty good!

Most dresses in this style are sleeveless but I found one with a very pretty lace top that has a 3/4 length-sleeve that reveals while concealing the arms, if ya know what I mean!

I'll e-mail you some pictures sometime soon.

Enjoy some WI weather this weekend!

05-25-2007, 11:47 PM
Hey gals! Well, the bridesmaid dresses are ordered! It feels good to have that taken care of. They are from David's - not my first choice, but pretty close - I compromised style/details for color - I wanted the cinnamon since it's a fall wedding. Let's see if I can insert a photo.

My dress has the same roushing (I think that's what it's called) at the waist, so they match my dress quite well, although mine have lace sleeves and a beaded/sequined bodice.

We got dyed to match shoes and I think I'll look for chiffon wraps for them in brown.

Now it's time for tuxes!

05-29-2007, 09:34 AM
BfL CatI love that brides maids dress it is so cute.

05-29-2007, 02:53 PM
BfL Cat- You have great taste! I have the same bridesmaids' dresses picked out in clover for my March 29, 2008 wedding. My bridesmaids loved it because the additional layer of fabric in the front hides a multitude of sins, not to mention provides additional warmth! I'd love to see a picture of your dress as I am hoping to keep the style of my wedding dress similar to my bridesmaids' dresses, too.

Shan- sorry, I haven't sent the pictures of the dresses I plan to try on. I spent a relaxing, do-nothing weekend in Madsion, of all places! I thought of you as we drove past Monona Terrace- on our way to the Essen Haus, where my diet officially derailed. We also hit the Angelic, which has an awesome Asian salmon salad, and the Admiralty Restaurant in the Edgewater Hotel, where we stayed.

05-31-2007, 03:53 PM
Lafayette – Glad you enjoyed your weekend in Madison! My DF got in trouble last time we were at the Essen House when one of the servers overheard him refer to the wait staff as “beer wenches”. It was after a couple of boots had been passed, and really, in those costumes it’s really not too off the mark. I love brunch there, the French toast is dangerous! Angelic is another one of my haunts, but I prefer the Dane for the beer selection.

I got out for a lovely run at picnic point over the long weekend. Too much going on right now and I need to get back to work. Hope to get back to thinking about wedding stuff after we close on the townhouse, a visit from my FMIL, moving, organizing 2 work events (major changes just thrown my way on the one that is happening on June 9), I’ve got a 5k this Saturday…you know…stuff. :faint:

Look forward to seeing those dresses whenever you get a chance to send or post pictures!

06-01-2007, 08:48 AM
I just told my fiance the beer wench story... he said that's like walking into Hooters and getting scolded for saying, "Look! Hooters!"

We went there for lunch so we ate on the Essen House deck but were actually served by Come Back Inn. Sadly, I missed the outfits!