Weight Loss Support - Is this just awful - or not?




View Full Version : Is this just awful - or not?


rockinrobin
02-21-2007, 03:34 PM
I always clean my plate. I don't leave a crumb behind. Not because I think I have to, but because I like to, even if I'm no longer hungry. In the old days, all right let's not even go there. The only meal where it's really a semi-issue would be dinner. I never get stuffed anymore. Certainly not with my breakfast or my lunch or my snacks, so the thought of not finishing is not an option. I am satisfied and have no hunger pangs. I've learned to recognize the difference. But sometimes at dinner I fill up my plate and I AM full before my whole allotment for dinner is finished. I count calories and I am not going over my calorie limits. But it's still something I haven't mastered, leaving behind some food. It really has nothing to do with wasting, because believe me if there's some forbidden food in the house that's getting to me I will not hesitate to chuck it in the trash.

I almost feel as if I'm entitled to eat it all, even though no longer hungry because I've planned for it's within my calories for the day. Nevertheless should I still be eating even though I am full? I'd really like to hear your thoughts on this and see if there is anyone out there like me. Thanks ladies.


Angihas2
02-21-2007, 03:44 PM
I catch myself doing this. SImply out of habit, no desire for the food, I'm not hungary, but it's there, it's accounted for, may as well eat it. I also have a big problem with bringing dinner to the table and serving it like that. I find for me, it's better to leave the food on the stove and get my plate of food that way, it gives me a few seconds to decide if I'm really hungery, or if I'm just eating because it's there. Last night, when I realised what I was doing, I got up, walked to the trash, and dumped it in. I know it sounds extreme, but it's what I have to do, for me to be successful.

Glory87
02-21-2007, 03:45 PM
Learning to leave food on a plate was a big thing for me - my parents were big fans of the "clean plate" club when I was growing up. I have always been able to eat when I wasn't hungry (so I don't do well with the "just listen to your body" advice, my body wants mint milanos, all the time). I am getting better with it, I try to do it on purpose, hey, I'm already full, I don't need/want that - push away, take to the kitchen immediately, dump down the sink.

Still, if I'm within my calories for the day, and the portion sizes have been measured - I almost always finish all of my meal (maybe for the same reasons? I am entitled? I like to eat? I find eating extremely pleasurable?). I am trying much harder to stop when I am truly STUFFED, I used to eat the the point of discomfort all the time (to me, that was full) and now I don't really like that too-full feeling. I am especially trying to figure this out in restaurants, when portion sizes are typically enormous (even when halved into a to-go box first thing!!). Then, I have to wrestle with thoughts like "but I PAID so MUCH for it"


Mrs Quadcrew
02-21-2007, 03:57 PM
Interesting topic Robin. I think most of us that have a weight issue were all made to "clean" our plates as children. To be honest, that is something I have also been working on. YES - I did allot for this food in my eating, but it is OK to throw it out if I am full. VERY hard to do, but I want to think like a fit person now, not one that is on a "diet". That is one aspect that I am working on ~ and eventually I will be OK with. Given the years that I overfed myself and paid no attention whatsoever to whether I was full or not, I think I am making pretty good progress.;)

I think it is also cool to see others thinking/working on the same things I am too! This is gonna be a GREAT year for a lot of us here!!

Crescendo
02-21-2007, 04:00 PM
I know this might sound stupid but I buy smaller plates. I use salad plates instead of bigger dinner plates. Thus, I can "clean the plate" without feeling guilty. Plus, must people have the habit of filling up the plate regardless of how big the plate is -- thus, if you use a smalled plate you will eat less.

ItsAboutTime
02-21-2007, 04:03 PM
I try to take less so I can still clean my plate. Sometimes I don't. I use to think I needed seconds.....I don't remember the last time I got seconds though.

Angihas2
02-21-2007, 04:20 PM
I know this might sound stupid but I buy smaller plates. I use salad plates instead of bigger dinner plates. Thus, I can "clean the plate" without feeling guilty. Plus, must people have the habit of filling up the plate regardless of how big the plate is -- thus, if you use a smalled plate you will eat less.

Not stupid at all. I did this too. We have Williams And Sonoma everyday wear in white. I went to WalMart and bought bright primary colors in different, smaller shapes. It's a nice bright contrast with the white and its smaller.

shelby897
02-21-2007, 04:27 PM
Rockinrobin -- I know what you mean -- if I'm alotted a cup of pasta, I want my whole cup darn it!! I had to log the calories, I always feel like I'm entitled to them. But, I'm starting to just walk away and either put it in the fridge for later, if I get hungry for it or just dump it. We tend to chat after dinner while the kids are still eating -- god they are slow - I wish I could do that!! So I've been getting up and putting my plate in the kitchen and coming back, because I know I will pick at it if it's in front of me, even if I'm done. A question for everyone -- I was brought up you eat at 8:00 a.m., 12:00 p.m. and 6:00 p.m. for meals -- what do you do if you just aren't hungry then? Aside from eating dinner with the family at 6:00 p.m., can't I just eat when I'm hungry and not have "lunch/breakfast" times?

Wanna be a loser
02-21-2007, 04:47 PM
I am doing WW points. I eat what is on my plate even though I don't feel hungry. I may feel full but do not feel stuffed. I do this as I was eating too few points. It is an effort to get all my points in each day. At a restaurant I stop immediately once I feel full. I have never left the table with a stuffed feeling since I have started my journey. Robin you are doing awesome just look at your ticker. You are a wonderful inspiration for all of us. Thanks for sharing.

lilybelle
02-21-2007, 05:00 PM
Robin , we think so much alike. I was just talking to my SD about this today. I always clean my plate. I usually put all my food for the day in Fitday first thing of the morning. It doesn't bother me at all to not eat a snack that I had planned if I'm not hungry, but for some reason I clean my whole plate at dinner. I think that my brain is saying "but what if you get hungry later and have already thrown the rest of your dinner out?"

My son's XGF that was 5'9 and 118 lbs. used to eat burgers and fries all the time. The thing I did notice, that although her food choices were usually junk, she'd eat maybe half the meal and throw the rest away. I have never been able to do this.

I know that when I eat now, that I feel satisfied but never stuffed. I also very much agree that I sometimes think "well I'm allowed X amt. of calories, so I'm gonna eat them all". If the rest of my family cleaned their plates as good as I do, I wouldn't need to scrape out scraps every night. LOL.

alinnell
02-21-2007, 05:04 PM
I'm more apt to leave food on my plate at a restaurant because they usually serve bigger portions than I need or want. I don't, however, leave enough for me to take home for another meal. I should probably start doing that!!

If I take the time to make a nice meal, I don't want it to go to waste, so I do clean my plate. But there have been a few times that I've eaten my share and I'm no longer hungry and there is some of this or that leftover and I'll throw it out only so it won't tempt me. I have a problem with some leftovers--they sit in their cute little containers in the fridge and call to me and I have to open the fridge and stick my fork in! That is soooooo bad of me!

rockinrobin
02-21-2007, 05:08 PM
I very often use a small plate, especially if there is a large serving plater of food that I will be taking from. I usually also just take it from the stove, dole it out over there. I really don't do seconds anymore (or thirds or fouths)

I am never stuffed where I can't breathe (like in the old days), not even close. I get soooo much fuller these days on sooooo much less food, but I am never stuffed. The other thing I also worry about is, I usually don't snack after dinner. So if I were to leave some dinner over, well then maybe I would get hungry again and be looking for a snack and what good would that be? Kind of like don't fix what ain't broke. But I guess it kind of bothers me that I just can't leave a crumb behind, with as far as I've come I still have plenty, PLENTY to learn and conquer. I still really like to eat and my dinners taste darn good and I wanna finish them.

Angihas, I also use the trash to keep me from eating certain things. No kidding. It doesn't bother me one bit to throw away the food, better in the trash then on my a$$.

Shelby I try to keep to a schedule, it's what works for me.

B- Between 9 & 9:30, depending on when I get hungry
S- about 11:30
L - between 1:30 and 2:30, depending on when I get hungry
S -about 4:00
D - between 6 & 6:45. Kids usually dictate this.

And yes Shelby you can eat whenever you are hungry ;) . Whatever works for YOU.

Beach Patrol
02-21-2007, 05:12 PM
There's only TWO reasons why I would ever clean my plate.

#1 - I'm THAT hungry.

#2 - the food is THAT good!

Okay three....

#3 - my mother is standing behind me reminding me that she brought me into this world, & she can take me out! ;) :D

rockinrobin
02-21-2007, 05:15 PM
Lilybelle and alinnell, you both posted while I was.

I swear to you Lilybelle, whenever I read one of your posts I sit here and nod my head in agreement - always. I can also always pass on the snack if I'm not hungry, but the dinner plate - nope, gotta clean it.

Alinnel, a restaurant is another story. I can't finish a plate there. I am such a control freak, it freaks me out to not know EXACTLY how many calories are in there and whatever, I have a real hard time not eating at home. Another thing I need to work on. And leftovers are killer for me. Killer. I really like making just enough food for everyone which is real hard. I used to have the exact opposite mentallity, that I should make extra - just in case someone's real hungry tonight. If I do have leftovers, I actually have to portion them out, and think in my head who's getting what. Kinda earmark it for this or that.

rockinrobin
02-21-2007, 05:19 PM
There's only TWO reasons why I would ever clean my plate.

#1 - I'm THAT hungry.

#2 - the food is THAT good!

Okay three....

#3 - my mother is standing behind me reminding me that she brought me into this world, & she can take me out! ;) :D

Okay for me dinner usually falls into #2, that's the problem. Sheesh, I think I just figured it out. I have to make food that I don't like so much. Ummm, thought about it, that's not gonna happen. Making food that I really enjoy is what is keeping me on track for so long.

JayEll
02-21-2007, 05:39 PM
Beach Patrol, LOL!!! I'm with you.

It has occurred to me that I really can eat LESS than the daily alloted calories. Just because I'm "supposed" to have X, and I am "allowed" to have X, doesn't mean I "have" to eat all of the X! Especially if I'm already feeling full. Sometimes I clean my plate completely, but sometimes I don't because I've had enough.

Also, full happens sooner than it used to. I just don't have the capacity I did a few months ago. This is a good thing, and I hope to keep it this way!

It helps me to keep in mind that all the food kinda gets recycled--if I don't eat it, and no one else does, the little bacteria and molds will eat it. After all, I can't send it to starving kids... and it won't help them for me to store it on my body...

Jay

ennay
02-21-2007, 05:44 PM
I do the same, in fact often I think I do it MORE now because I already figured out how much I was having for fitday and dont want to figure out how much I left behind.

At restaurants I usually cut everything in half before I take the first bite and push half to the side to take home.

YP1
02-21-2007, 05:58 PM
I ALWAYS clean my plate. Growing up there used to be huge rows at the dinner table when my sister didn't, and my dad would smack her if he left food. I didn't want that sort of confrontation, so always finished everything. Guess which of us ended up fatter?

To be honest, now I do clean my plate but it's very rare that I'm doing it when I'm not hungry. If I cook something and it says it makes a certain number of portions I make sure I divide it up into the right number of portions before sitting down to eat. It usually leaves me satisfied but not stuffed, so I don't need to feel guilty about eating it all.

I almost never eat out, so on the rare occasions I do, I like to enjoy it. I don't think our portions are as quite as big over here as in the states, and it only tends to be when I order more than one course that i start to struggle and feel like i'm eating because it's there rather than because I want it.

Clareh
02-21-2007, 06:20 PM
I have come to terms with the fact I was brought up to clean my plate (at home anyway- restaurant size portions are larger and different) and I've stopped feeling guilty about it. I just make sure the plate is smaller and filled with salad or veggies with a normal size portions.

And then I remind myself it's not the normal portion size meals of healthy food that I've eaten that stop me losing weight... it's the snacks and the junk food that sometime slips in round them!! (For me anyway)

VegasBabe
02-21-2007, 07:20 PM
Ok, here is my dilema.

My daughter, 7yo, doesn't usually leave her plate clean. I want to promote healthy eating and fill up on veggies and good food. Not snacks. If I allow her to leave her plate with food on it, she is hungry for stuff that isnt good for you. If I encorage her to finish her plate, I dont want to create habits that I am trying to break. Where is the middle ground?

Beach Patrol
02-21-2007, 07:24 PM
Beach Patrol, LOL!!! I'm with you.



Also, full happens sooner than it used to. I just don't have the capacity I did a few months ago. This is a good thing, and I hope to keep it this way!

Jay

That's true for me as well. Proves that the stomach is shrinking just a bit. Plus, I like to use "little plates" when I'm at home. Helps keep things in prospective, ya know! When I go out to eat, I end up either taking half of the meal home, or just leaving it. Plus, I'm working really hard on recognizing when I'm truly hungry, & not just bored or whatever.

Every little bit helps, eh? :carrot:

shelby897
02-21-2007, 08:03 PM
Vegas babe -- I have a 7 year old son the same way. We very rarely have dessert for that reason, and when we do it's grapes or applesauce, etc. I have tried to teach him to listen to his body and I try to take his word for it. If he is hungry later and didn't completely finish his dinner, I offer him a boring snack -- a few crackers, fruit, etc., no junk. I was forced to clean my plate as a kid, food was tightly monitored, etc. which partially caused my eating disorder. I make sure he eats slowly, tries everything but if he doesn't clean his plate, I don't care too much.

Vamp
02-21-2007, 08:16 PM
I know this sounds strange but lately when I eat dinner I bring salt with me and set it next to my plate.. The very moment I feel I'm full I salt the **** out of the food so I'm not tempted to eat any more of it. :) Extreme, but it works for me. :P

mandalinn82
02-21-2007, 08:41 PM
I'm another that really does clean my plate, every time. Of course, I eat at home 99% of the time, and the food I cook is on-plan, delicious, and I don't have any guilt about it. When I do go out, I'm super-careful with my ordering so I can be likewise on plan, and usually take half or more home.

I never make enough that I am stuffed, though, just satisfied. The only times I don't clean my plate are when i'm sick.

If your plate is full of good, healthy, clean, accounted-for food, and you're not stuffing yourself to the point of being uncomfortable, I see no problem eating until the plate is empty.

almostheaven
02-21-2007, 08:46 PM
Not cleaning your plate doesn't equate to wasting food. Simply store it and have it if you get hungry later for a snack, or have it as part of tomorrow's lunch. But eating when we're not hungry is something we need to resist.

ennay
02-21-2007, 08:46 PM
Ok, here is my dilema.

My daughter, 7yo, doesn't usually leave her plate clean. I want to promote healthy eating and fill up on veggies and good food. Not snacks. If I allow her to leave her plate with food on it, she is hungry for stuff that isnt good for you. If I encorage her to finish her plate, I dont want to create habits that I am trying to break. Where is the middle ground?

snacks should be just as healthy as meals....the other stuff is occasional food that you only offer once in a while. I try to be as random as possible with treat food so there is no "reward" for eating or being good, just today happens to be a day when we have treats.

if my dd has eaten a reasonable amount (tried most of the stuff on her plate -not cleaned it) and later is hungry, I give her a choice of healthy snacks. - occasionally the conversation goes

"you may have an apple or grapes"

"i want something else" (something else is her code for treat)

"you may have apple, grapes or nothing"

"nothing"

At dinner, when she is most prone to refuse to eat what is offered, we don't dump her plate til she goes to bed, if she is hungry later the plate comes back out.

Also for the most part I try to offer her healthy food and let her control the portions.

On the rare occasions she DOES clean her plate, I usually try to offer healthy something elses if she says she is still hungry. fruit, hummus, crackers, cheese, nuts.

almostheaven
02-21-2007, 08:48 PM
That's true for me as well. Proves that the stomach is shrinking just a bit. Plus, I like to use "little plates" when I'm at home. Helps keep things in prospective, ya know! When I go out to eat, I end up either taking half of the meal home, or just leaving it. Plus, I'm working really hard on recognizing when I'm truly hungry, & not just bored or whatever.

Every little bit helps, eh? :carrot:
I used to get an appetizer, a large meal with a starter salad, AND a dessert...eat every drop plus tackle most of the rolls or bread that was brought out. Sometimes I'd unbutton my pants after eating just to feel comfortable. ICK! Haven't done that in years now.

ennay
02-21-2007, 08:51 PM
I've been looking for some really nice smaller plates to replace my dishes with. Most of the salad plates are too small. I have a few that are a great size from an old old set of dishes.

mandalinn82
02-21-2007, 09:04 PM
Then again, I don't think I've gotten to "stuffed" once on this journey except on my "planned off-plan" meal (once a month or so, something comes up and I just decide to not be as regimented that day. It works for me). I cook just enough to be satisfied, and fill in any differences in hunger level that day with snacks.

For example, Monday (the holiday) I wasn't that hungry. I ate my entire dinner and lunch, but none of my snacks. Today I have my personal trainer, which always means a hungry evening, so I've added in an extra snack this evening. So it may be that I'm not really eating past the "full" point because I plan my meals and snack sizes according to the level of hunger I have or predict I'll have.

But eating when we're not hungry is something we need to resist.

Actually, lots of plans that people on the board have had success with advocate eating every couple of hours, a smaller amount, so that you never really GET hungry. I don't know that "eating when not hungry" is a viable thing to resist in a blanket sort of way - there are so many unknowns and other factors. Eating to a point of uncomfortable fullness probably should be avoided as much as possible, but just not eating if you aren't hungry harms planning! Say you're not quite hungry yet, but you are about to get trapped in a meeting where you can't be eating for the next three hours (this happens SO often to me with the nature of my job) - way better to eat when you're not hungry than to be ravenous 3 hours later and not make good choices. Or if you're at HOME now and can have your healthy snack, but will be out in an hour when you're actually hungry and not able to bring it with you, better to make a healthy choice and eat when not hungry than to wait until you're hungry and make an unhealthy choice.

Sometimes I think that obese and formerly obese people are really disconnected with those feelings of fullness and hunger, and while an EVENTUAL goal should be to get back in contact with those feelings, it can help to have a more regimented plan (ie - I get x amount of food at y time and then a amount of food at b time) and just FOLLOW it until you get more of a sense of how your own body works. This is what I've done - started with just eating set amounts at set times, then moved toward adjusting those times/meal plans toward my day's activity and hunger level. It still works.

Angihas2
02-21-2007, 09:16 PM
snacks should be just as healthy as meals....the other stuff is occasional food that you only offer once in a while. I try to be as random as possible with treat food so there is no "reward" for eating or being good, just today happens to be a day when we have treats.

if my dd has eaten a reasonable amount (tried most of the stuff on her plate -not cleaned it) and later is hungry, I give her a choice of healthy snacks. - occasionally the conversation goes

"you may have an apple or grapes"

"i want something else" (something else is her code for treat)

"you may have apple, grapes or nothing"

"nothing"

At dinner, when she is most prone to refuse to eat what is offered, we don't dump her plate til she goes to bed, if she is hungry later the plate comes back out.

Also for the most part I try to offer her healthy food and let her control the portions.

On the rare occasions she DOES clean her plate, I usually try to offer healthy something elses if she says she is still hungry. fruit, hummus, crackers, cheese, nuts.

This is pretty much how it is in our house too. I fill my kids plate the way I do mine, 50% veggies, 25% meat or protien source and 25% pasta, brown rice or bread or whatever the side is. Dinner is followed by grapes, an orange or an apple. If they choose not to finish their food, which considering they're 18 mos and 3, thats fine, we still allow them the fruit dessert. I don't see any sense in withholding fruit simply because they didn't eat all their pasta or rice. My kids eat veggies like it's their job, doesn't matter how I make them, they eat them, and we really could move to Japan tomorrow, and they'd never know, considering their dad is half Japanese, we eat alot of fish, brown rice, steamed veggies, start meals with a broth style soup, usually I do low sodium broth and toss some egg whites and veggies in there, they eat that up too, so if they don't finish, no biggie.

Mel
02-21-2007, 09:27 PM
I eat every 3 hours and have for the last 5 years. The result is I'm ravenously hungry every 3 hours. But I do think it's a healthier way to lose and maintain weight.

I'm also a plate cleaner.

Robin, this really hit home in your initial post:
I almost feel as if I'm entitled to eat it all, even though no longer hungry because I've planned for it's within my calories for the day

Not only do I clean my plate at every one of my 5 meals, I practically wring out the blender to get every micron of shake :lol3: I was doing this today and realized it, but while part of me was saying "give it up, you aren't going to notice not having 1 more teaspoonful", another part was saying " It's MINE! I'm going to get every last drop of that into my cup! It's MINE! I'm allowed to have it!" Kind of weird considering I've been at this for almost 6 years now and been maintaining for over five. I really don't think that it's every going to change for me. I know that I'll be eating "mindfully" for the rest of my life. That's OK-- it works.

Mandalinn- FANTASTIC new picture!

Mel

ennay
02-21-2007, 09:32 PM
I was thinking along the same lines as Manda...Robin, you have made some amazing radical changes in a very short time. Is "cleaning your plate" a habit you may need/want to break in the future - sure it would be great to have the ability to eat to satisfaction and then stop.

But...it is only ONE step of many and you have to do what works. Perfectionism is more dangerous than almost any bad habit.

So lets say a few months from now when you are almost at goal you are finding that it is time to take another step in order to keep things working. Maybe then it will be time to explore the hunger/full/satisified spectrum and learn a new way of eating. But for NOW I wouldnt stress about it unless you are feeling the desire to take another step.

It is always a balance between what is working and what we think we should be doing. I considered giving up something for Lent, because at times it could be a good motivator etc...but I decided that right now at this moment, I am in a pretty delicate balance between feeling deprived and satisfied and I fear that if I mess with it right now by putting something off limits it could backfire on me. Maybe in June I'll be ready to observe "Lent". (Not being Christian, the timing is not that crucial for me :p)

Glory87
02-21-2007, 09:40 PM
Not cleaning your plate doesn't equate to wasting food. Simply store it and have it if you get hungry later for a snack, or have it as part of tomorrow's lunch. But eating when we're not hungry is something we need to resist.

I eat before I get hungry all the time - I hate being hungry. Sometimes I get flushed and jittery and I make really really bad food decisions. In my past, diets meant being hungry and going without and being miserable and just waiting for the diet to end. This time, I told myself I didn't have to be hungry and miserable. It works for me, I eat every 2 hours.

Mami
02-21-2007, 10:35 PM
Robin, you're doing awesome. Just keep doing EXACTLY what you've been doing all this time.

I also tend to make bad choices when I wait too long to eat. I hate being out when I'm starving because usually there's nothing good (healthy) out there at your finger tips. Today I got so hungry I actually lost my appetite. As we speak I have a big plate of food sitting here and I can't eat it. This is highly unusual as typically I love my food! And I eat all of it without guilt..life is too short and should be enjoyed..but just via substituted healthy low cal options.

shelby897
02-21-2007, 11:09 PM
Okay, so I've gone from ripping open the 1/2 gallon container of ice cream to make sure I get it all to -- "should I clean my plate" -- I can live with that!!

I agree with ennay -- if this is working for you -- clean your plate!! When you are ready, you'll know. Little changes (you've had to have about 1,000 "little changes" at this point, you've done so awesome!!) are what work, if it's ingrained to clean your plate and you've only put your anticipated portion on it, go ahead -- it was the "clean the kid's plates, empty the leftovers into my mouth, etc." that got us in trouble in the first place.

rockinrobin
02-21-2007, 11:16 PM
Thanks so much for all your responses.

I don't feel guilty about finishing up my dinner, believe me the whole entire meal isn't more then 400 calories, so maybe we're talking about 50 calories here and there. And of course it's only good and healthy food. But nevertheless I guess it's just one of those things that I've always heard - "to stop eating when satisfied" . And of course I don't usually listen to "they", I listen to me. I have formulated my own plan, yet am always tweaking it. I also figure that somewhere down the line, if and when I get to that dreaded plateau (G-d forbid) that might be a place I could cut back. The more I hear these responses, I guess I am not the only one who feels they can and should finish their entire meal. And that makes me feel better. I think if I were already at goal I wouldn't feel this way, I wouldn't question it at all - but I'm not at goal.

I've said this a few times recently. I really enjoy my food now. I am eating sooo much less then I used to I can't even begin to tell you. I am also enjoying everything I eat now so much more. I really appreciate every little crumb that goes down my throat. Before I ate without thinking, everything and anything, nothing was off limits, not quality or quantity. I was like the spoiled kid who has too many toys, he's got so much he appreciates NOTHING. And now that there's sooo much less of it, it has taken on a new meaning for me. So like Mel, I am scrapping up the blender, cup of yogurt and on and on and on. I really don't see that changing anytime soon. Who knows? I've got a long way to go still. But I doubt that it will change.

That's funny Shelby, I forgot all about that, I used to practically clean my kids plate as well. That was a big problem for me. But not any more. Thank goodness.

Ennay, your most recent post on this topic was very well put and hit home for me in several spots. Especially the perfectionism part. I'm not sure what's gotten into me lately.

Both of your posts too Mandalinn.

And I kinda 100% agree with Glory- I DO NOT wait til I am passing out from hunger in order to eat. I have a schedule for when I eat, I posted it earlier. I too hate, hate, hate that hungry, jittery, passing out feeling. I eat when I just am barely beginning to get hungry, every 2 -3 hours.

You guys really, really get what I'm saying and see where I'm coming from. Thank you again everyone. You've all given me some "food for thought". It least there's no calories involved. ;)

almostheaven
02-21-2007, 11:55 PM
I eat before I get hungry all the time - I hate being hungry. Sometimes I get flushed and jittery and I make really really bad food decisions. In my past, diets meant being hungry and going without and being miserable and just waiting for the diet to end. This time, I told myself I didn't have to be hungry and miserable. It works for me, I eat every 2 hours.
Then I'll reword it: Eating when we're "full" is something we need to resist. ;) If we're full, there's no good reason to overeat and stuff ourselves. There's absolutely no good reason to unsnap our pants after a meal. :D

baffled111
02-22-2007, 01:20 AM
Re: eating in restaurants and dealing with massive portions. I've heard that a great thing to do in this situation is to ask your server for a to-go box right after they bring you your meal. That way you can take half (or third, or whatever) the food off your plate and box it up right away and save yourself the unnecessary calories. I, for one, will eat every single french fry on my plate, no matter how full I am (or how much salt is on them). I can leave half a burger, but not the fries. The solution is to box the food before you become completely seduced by the fat.

I'm interested in the "clean plate club" (or in my family, the, "there are starving kids in China") problem with kids. I've often thought that the imperative to finish one's dinner as a child contributes to an unhealthy relationship with food among adults. I hadn't thought of it in terms of compensating later with unhealthy snacks (I don't have kids), but I still think it's important to teach children to 'listen' to their bodies in the way that we over-weight adults have difficulty doing.

mandalinn82
02-22-2007, 02:39 AM
There is "trying to improve because something is broken" and there is "trying to improve because someone tells you that its what you should do". The way I see it, you've done SO MUCH to improve your habits, I know you're eating good, healthy foods because I've seen you talk about your menus, and your losses are going at a good rate. So worrying about whether its "bad" (which is so arbitrary when you get down to this level...) to finish 50 extra calories of food beyond "full" just seems so stressful and pointless to me.

Lately I've been having an angry tirade in my head against the diet industry, and lots of people, who keep trying to tell me (and you!) that your efforts, (even though they are working and your body is thanking you, even though you are feeling better, even though you are fueling yourself on your way to a happier, healthier life) aren't enough because there is so much more you could do. Nobody is perfect, nobody has a perfect diet, and if we ate all the things we were "supposed" to eat and didn't eat all of the things we "shouldn't" and did all of the things we were supposed to do and resisted all temptation, we'd have to live in a hole and we'd probably end up dead anyway from the resulting stress and depression.

Gah, that turned into a rant. Point is, you're doing so well and if it isn't broken, don't fix it, and don't worry about whether you are doing the "right" things...worry about whether they are right for YOU and whether they are helping you to meet your goals.

rockinrobin
02-22-2007, 07:45 AM
Thanks Mandalinn, I needed that. Point well taken. :hug:


Then I'll reword it: Eating when we're "full" is something we need to resist. ;) If we're full, there's no good reason to overeat and stuff ourselves. There's absolutely no good reason to unsnap our pants after a meal. :D

Almostheaven, as you've read, I do kinda continue to eat when I'm full every now and then and I gotta tell you it HAS been working for me. I also think those few extra calories are sustaining me for the entire evening and keeping me from snacking all night long. So for me, I think that's a pretty good reason. To each his own. The more I do this, the more I see there is no ONE RIGHT WAY TO DO THINGS. There is no ONE formula. And that's perfectly okay.

lipidful
02-22-2007, 09:02 AM
Wow. I haven't read through all the responses. But this sounds just like me! I've figured out about how many calories I need each day to maintain my weight and I will continue to eat until I've completed my total LOL even if I'm not hungry any more. Sometimes I don't feel my best after (never disgustingly stuffed, just not the optimal "neutral" feeling I've come to appreciate) Why do I do this? WHY? I feel like while I've changed a lot of bad habits, this is maybe still some vestige of a bad habit left over that I still need to work on. I'm not going to beat myself up over it. I just need to work on it.
edited to add:
It's not even about the calories, because like I said, it's within the amount that I've figured out I can consume without putting on weight. It's more about a mindset, and how I want to change my mindset so I can live mindfully for the rest of my life.

Heather
02-22-2007, 09:17 AM
I do the same thing as many of you. Eat to my calorie allotment, even when I'm not hungry. To tag onto what lipidful said, the problem for me is that I feel the food still has control over me on some level. But I console myself with the thought that I have a lot more control than I used to, and that I'm living within the calorie allotment I set myself, which is so much more control than I used to have. I suppose it's a compromise of sorts.

I've built up bad habits over a life and have only been doing this a year and a half. I've made lots of changes and hope to keep making improvements. But just as the weight won't come off overnight, the mind won't change overnight...

Mandalinn -- I hadn't read your post before posting mine, but I feel very much in line with what you said!

Beach Patrol
02-22-2007, 01:58 PM
I have heard forever about how eating 5 or 6 "smaller" meals per day is better than 3 stuff-me meals. I always thought "that's gotta be some kind of crazy meal plan that a 105 pound skinny-minnie came up with..."

Well, it's exactly what I've been doing recently (& eating the SouthBeachDiet suggested foods). I have found that I don't eat nearly as much, because if I wait until I'm really hungry, I am sure to go overboard & end up feeling like a deer on a taxidermist wall. I literally HATE that "oh-so-stuffed" feeling.

So mostly, I have a decent brekkie, a 10am snackage, Noonish lunch, a 3pm snackage, & a 6:30ish dinner - sometimes I feel like having the 8pm snackage, but mostly I don't - so mostly I am eating 5 times a day.

I am not sure yet whether or not this is helping or hindering my weight loss, BUT I FEEL BETTER, & isn't that part of the program? ;) :D

marbleflys
02-22-2007, 02:19 PM
my mother was the top recruiter for "The Clean Plate Club"....(there are starving children in several countries yaknow)...I wised up around age 15 when hip-hugger bell bottoms became more attractive then whipped cream and I wanted to be a size 2. (never happened).

I constantly have to tell myself that it is OK to throw food away, better in the trash then on my buttisimo....but my mother's clean plate motto is still there, I had a very chubby dog (who ate the leftovers) and one of my cats methodically finishes the others food portions.

I have a skinny BF who finishes my restaurant dinners...we now order lightly and share plates, so there is no over-stuffed feeling and extras hiding in the fridge....(my one exception is lobster)

BlueToBlue
02-22-2007, 05:39 PM
I pretty much always eat my calorie allotment for the day because it's actually pretty low and my exercise level is pretty high, so I think it's important that I eat enough calories. If I don't eat what I planned for the day, I'm going to be low.

Like a lot of others here, I eat every few hours: 3 meals and 3 or 4 snacks. Most of the time, I'm hungry when meal/snack time rolls around and it's pretty rare that I'm full before I finish it. But if I'm not hungry or I'm full before I finish, I usually eat it anyway because I want to make sure I'm getting enough calories. If I were getting to the point of being overstuffed, I wouldn't eat any more, but otherwise I eat what I planned to eat for the day. It is important not to be low on calories, especially if you exercise a lot.

VegasBabe
02-23-2007, 12:48 PM
Do you remember the first time you DIDN'T clean your plate? I had to physically take my left over food and throw it in the garbage. Then take the garbage bag to the can outside. That was a very difficult hurtle. I kept repeating in my head, "I am full, I dont want anymore food"

My husband, g-d love him, is so hard to deal with. He will ask me, "Did you have enough?" THREE TIMES!! (in different versions. ie. Would you like more? Anyone want seconds?) I have to accept his repetition and wait for all three questions to know he is satisfied with the answer. Then he says, "Here, taste this." as he shoves it in my face. Of course it is not something I would choose for low calorie, high fiber food. I dont mean to hurt his feelings, but the "No" is reactive now-a-days. It comes out without even thinking. I have to say he is adjusting a bit. Sometimes he serves my plate like the children's plate. There is hope afterall.