Weight Loss Support - I have the desire but lack the motivation...

01-30-2007, 11:40 PM
Hey everyone, I'm fairly new here. I am having a really hard time for some reason getting going this time around. I just had my 2nd child and was so excited when I decided it was time to start losing this weight, but for some reason today is day 4 I can't seem to stay on track. It's like my motivation and determination went out the window somehow. to make things worse I have to lose this weight before the first of June cause I'm the matron of honor in my sisters wedding on July 7th! I did great up until today. I just wanted to eat everything in the house. I've done really well refraining from consuming the kitchen but still. What is going on? I have set what I thought were reasonable goals to achieve along the way so I don't know what to do now. My first mini goal is to weigh between 190-185 by February 26th. My sons 3rd birthday. Last year at his birthday I weighted about 152. I felt great and looked good. I came across a pic of us then and it just makes me want to cry I'm so huge now. Sorry to ramble thanks for listening anyway!

01-30-2007, 11:50 PM
Congratulations on the birth of your 2nd child!!!

You mentioned that you want to eat everything in the house. When I first started this, that was a key issue for me. I had to empty the house of all forbidden foods. I stocked it with only fresh veggies and other healthy stuff. This way if I "wanted to go through the kitchen" the damage would be minimal. It really helped me to get started. I could not have done it any other way. I found the first 2 - 3 weeks very hard. Then it got much easier. If you can make it those first few weeks then you will start to see results, you'll feel better and the cravings and hunger will practically cease, propelling you to go further.

01-31-2007, 08:10 AM
I am totally there with RRobin. You got to build trust with yourself, you can start doing that by getting rid of the bad food in the house, and nabbing a few tasty treats and portioning them out. Not many, mine is one box of Hot Tamales. I portion them into 10 pieces, wrap them, and keep them in an out of the way drawer. Allow yourself a portion a day, or when you go out as a safety net against temptation.

Another really important idea is to keep colorful fruit and vegetables in convenient places to grab: on counters, tables, a piece or two on your desk. Be strong, and confident, and pick up a hands hobby like knitting and a piece of sugar free gum. ^-^ First few weeks are hard, but the more you focus on living life and less living through eating- the better you'll be. If your desire is waning, your goal may not be that important to you- not really. Find satisfaction in your children, and if you can't do it for you at first- do it for them. I know you will want to raise them with a powerful positive role model- one who isn't a slave to a bag of dorritos or a box of mac-and-cheese. Lastly… focus on a goal that isn’t superficial, like long health- long life… so that instead of looking on in a dress in six months… in 20 years you will be just as lively and active and as much apart of your children’s and grandchildren’s live as you will want

Here is an interesting article about over-eating and triggers, this may help you see things that may seem obvious but many people overlook: http://www.prevention.com/article/0,5778,s1-4-88-103-7671-1,00.html

Good Luck! ^-^

01-31-2007, 08:22 AM
Hi, You can do it everyone is here for you. I do this the same way as I deal with my alcoholism. One day at a time, one step at a time. As long as I don't have that first drink I won't have more. As long as I don't have that first bite of something bad I won't have more. I keep 3/4 full at all times on whole good for you foods.

01-31-2007, 09:11 AM
Hi Reddalice!

I checked out the article and MANY more! They are FABULOUS! Thanks so much!:)


01-31-2007, 09:27 AM
Hi Hillarie!

You are right where so many of us have been MANY, MANY times! I think things get going and we get scared with all the changes that we KNOW we must make. Remember: we humans don't deal easily with change!

The good news is that you are here and posting your thoughts, and you are here among friends who understand!:hug:

Sharon, Reddalice, and Robin have given you great tips and advice already. What I'd like to add is give yourself time FOR YOU! You just had your second child. Congratulations!:congrat: THAT'S a HUGE change right there-not to mention all the recuperation and rest that needs to happen to get that body back to its pre-pregnant state! Your body has been VERY, VERY busy these last nine months! Your hormones may still be all over the place, too. Be patient, and give a hug to your new little one for all of us! :hug:

Eat nutritious foods but less of them. Watch the portions, and also TRY to get as much sleep as possible. Don't worry about the housework for now. Curl up and enjoy that new little one and marvel at the miracle that just happened!:)

When you are calm and rested the world will look like a much better place and you will find it easier to sort out how to reach you NEXT goal- weight loss!


01-31-2007, 11:31 AM
You've lost 22 pounds already -- congrats!!

You said you wanted to lose weight because of a wedding and have set date goals. That can work, but it seems that lots of people get frustrated if they don't meet those goals and give up! Also, losing for an event may lead to regaining after you get there.

Would it help to think of the other reasons to lose weight for you??? Like, you want to be able to play with your kids, show them good habits? Maybe that would be better motivation than the wedding? Just a thought...

01-31-2007, 12:10 PM
I ditto everything that has been said so far. But you say you are on day 4. Day 4 of what? How many calories are you consuming? I find that if I'm too restrictive on my calories (you should eat a minimum of 1200 per day), then the following day I just go crazy. I'm hungry all day and nothing will satisfy the hunger. You might try using fitday and checking your calorie level to make sure you are getting enough. Also, if you're breastfeeding, you need to be even more careful to get enough nutrients.

Good luck. This will pass and you will lose the weight.

01-31-2007, 12:29 PM
I was reading in the Maintainers forums last night, I use it as a way to show me WHAT I'll be doing for the REST OF MY LIFE. I think alot of us start down the road to weight loss with one specific desitnation in mind. Usually, its a vanity reason. Mine was, I wanted to be that hot chick I used to be, now, I just want to be a healthy mom for my kids. I want to SEE them graduate high school, college, get married have their own kids, and MORE I don't ever ever want to see my kids struggle with my weight issues. It took some serious thinking for me to realise that yes, looking good is a great benefit, the better benefit is never hearing the words "I'm fat, I need to diet", coming out of my daughters mouth. Never seeing them or me worry over their weight, their health with regards to weight issues etc. I read something on here last night, and I thought about it all night, and all morning and it rings true. "Motivation is an EMOTION, emotions come and go. Dedication is what is needed to see this through." Like any other emotion, be it anger, frustration, sadness, joy, etc they ALL come and they all go. What you're left with is what will see you to the loss you want. Instead of focusing on that dress for the wedding, focus instead on longer term goals, such as, a happy and healthy heart, especially if you have heart disease in your family, lowered risks of diabetes, lowered risks of some female cancers, higher rates of long life, the ability to run around the park with your kids, having a lap for your kids to sit in, thats a HUGE one for me, I now have a place for my kids to sit. They can snuggle up to me in the middle of the night and be ON MY LAP, instead of over my shoulder and draping over my fat belly. Everytime one of them managed to cuddle in my lap it just confirms, what I'm doing is the best, for us ALL. Good luck and keep using 3FC as a support board. Thats what we're al here for.