Weight Loss Support - Ok, I'm Fat not Pregnant
01-06-2007, 09:39 PM
isn't this like in the code of being a women. If one is not completely showing a large protruding belly with no chance of it being just fat, we are not to assume that she is just fat or pregnant. What is wrong with these other women, do they not know the code of conduct?:nono: It makes me crazy.
And the kicker is the women usually asking when my baby is due is heavier then me...... GO figure!Had to vent
01-06-2007, 09:46 PM
I had a cashier in the grocery store ask me when my baby was due once. I wasnt even all that heavy then, just had a baggy sweatshirt. The kicker...for THREE years after that she kept asking me how my baby was doing.
in contrast my podiatrist read my chart very carefully and then very carefully asked questions so he could verify I was pregnant without assuming. And I was 8 1/2 months at the time....I looked PREGNANT
01-06-2007, 11:14 PM
People can be so insensitive!!! I'm sorry one of these block headed women said something to you!
01-06-2007, 11:54 PM
This one male humorist--I can't remember his name--I think it's Dave something--had as one of his rules of life, as I remember it, "Never say anything about a woman that indicates you think she is pregnant unless you actually see a baby coming out of her body."
Edit: Dave Barry, that's his name.
I had a baby 6 months ago and I still get asked that. Last week this woman who had a 9 month old and also wasn't exactly thin. I've never had that much belly fat, but since having the baby, I have so much on my stomach. But still, I'm really getting tired of this!
01-07-2007, 07:38 AM
You guys have met some real clods...and these comments coming from WOMEN?
Actually come to think of it, I have my own story. There was this heavyset woman (easily twice my size) who was a cashier at my college's dining hall. My freshman year I had lost quite a bit of weight (around 145) so I was slim. Then I gained all that weight back and was up to 160. This cashier was like "did you change since last year?" and I said (trying to let her get out of it) "you mean taller?" and she's like no "like ... smaller???" I was SO angry. Honestly. Why do people think they have a voice regarding my or anyone's weight for that matter? Grrr... anyway, just ignore it is what I would say.
Jay - I LOVE Dave Barry. :D
01-07-2007, 10:17 AM
Well, I've been asked that by an OB, in passing, at the hospital where I work. It is terrible. It was also what kicked my behind into getting out of denial and being thoughtful about my weight, nutrition, exercise, etc. (although to see the scale this am you wouldn't know it. 11 pounds away from my all-time *nonpregnant* high).
I do feel for you. It really sucks. I usually answer "Not unless you know something I don't know."
01-07-2007, 02:02 PM
I was in a book store recently when a sales clerk asked me when "the baby" was due. I wanted to crawl in a hole because my baby is 6 yrs old!! I haven't lost the baby weight gain from my pregnancy and have actually added about 20 lbs. I didn't know what to say. It felt better to go along with it rather than say, "I'm fat, not pregnant, b****!" (sorry) So I said that the baby was due in 3 months. How embarrassing. I am unlucky in the fact that I carry most of my weight in my tummy, but still don't think I look pregnant. I do wear loose fitting tops though because I've got that funny double tummy thing (one chubby roll over another!).
It really is a wake up call though when someone bumps into your denial. You have to admit to yourself that you aren't average size if someone make a comment like that. I like to pretend that I'm not that fat!
My rule of thumb is that I will never mention anyone's pregnancy unless they specifically tell me themselves that they are having a baby.
01-07-2007, 02:34 PM
I was that incensitive clod once, I felt sooooo bad after she said with a sad sigh: "No, I just got fat..." I felt awful and never EVER asked that question again... but I saw her a while later nice and trim, so that comment is maybe what got her going on her weightloss...
01-07-2007, 02:37 PM
I haven't had anyone thing I was pregnant, but I did work in one store as a cashier for about five years - I was pretty slim when I started there, and gained the weight over the time I was there. I had 2 regular customers comment on it - one woman reached over the till, pinched my cheek, and told me I'd gotten chubby since I started working there. Then, during the initial low-carb craze, another customer, with nothing to prompt him, told me it looked as if I'd been on the high-carb diet. What an a-hole! I'm SO glad I don't work in customer service anymore!
01-07-2007, 05:52 PM
Some people shoot thier mouths and think later. I currently work with a very very tiny girl who actually happens to be quite pregnant. Yesterday she said I am so tiered of feeling like a house...how do you do it all of the time?
The crazy thing she didn't mean it cruelly. Maybe pregnancy kills brain cells.......
Maybe pregnancy kills brain cells.......
No...it's the kids themselves.
Many years ago I went sofa shopping a few days after endoscopic surgery to try and figure out why i wasn't getting pregnant. I complained to the sales woman that one of the sofas was really hard to get up from. Her response was that after I had my baby, I'd find it much easier. Talk about pouring salt on an open wound!
01-08-2007, 04:02 PM
I had one child while I was in the Army, and got out when I got pregnant with the second 6 months after I had the first. I went to my first "Officer's Wives Club" meeting in maternity clothes, and was appalled when they didn't realize I was pregnant again. (They knew *of* me, but not personally. I'd never attended a meeting before because I was too busy with my own career.) I really blushed when I had to explain. I thought it was obvious. Some of them said they just assumed that I was overweight from the first baby still.
So, with me it was embarrassing to be the other way around. I was highly embarrassed to be thought fat when I was pregnant.
01-08-2007, 05:11 PM
I've dealt with that too. (Why is it seemingly always cashiers, LOL?) Cashier asked me "When are you due?" And I said "I'm not due. I'm just fat." And she said "Oh gosh, I'm sorry." And I said, "yeah, me too!"
I have found that I feel better ABOUT ME when I can laugh about it. Of course, fat is nothing to laugh about... but still, I use my sense of humor as often as possible.