General chatter - My friend said the sweetest but saddest thing to me




cbmare
12-22-2006, 12:31 PM
My friend, Linda (the one with the hearing dog), sent me a message recently. I'd sent her one telling her that I enjoyed our lunch and that my aunt had died. She sent back a messages saying that she enjoyed lunch, condolences for my aunt and then this.

"Mare, you are the only one who doesn't treat me like I'm stupid because I'm deaf. You are the only one right now who loves me for just being who I am."

I thought that was sweet but so sad. I'm the only one? Linda is a terrific person. She's successful in her job. She used to sing in a band - yes she's deaf and wears 2 hearing aids. She has a beautiful voice and stays on key when she's singing. She can sing harmony as well when someone around her is singing.

She's in a really crappy relationship and has made big strides at dumping this guy.


Jen415
12-22-2006, 12:49 PM
As a singer/musician, I am AMAZED to hear that she can sing and stay on pitch! It's hard enough when your hearing is fine! Kudos to her!

But you're right--I hate hearing how physically challenged folks are treated like they are mentally challenged as well. Most hearing people are totally uneducated when it comes to the hearing impaired.

collegebride
12-22-2006, 01:09 PM
:( That is sad. People just need to stop being so judgemental, but ah...we Americans love telling people how we feel and how it is.. (I say with annoyance) But Mare, atleast your friend has you. Maybe you could introduce her to some of your other friends who are supportive and not downers ;)


cbmare
12-22-2006, 02:17 PM
:( Maybe you could introduce her to some of your other friends who are supportive and not downers ;)

I have thought about telling her about this board. She lost quite a bit of weight a few years ago, but put it all back on when she went back to work. She and Tola, her hearing dog, quit walking 5+ miles per day.

cbmare
12-22-2006, 02:23 PM
As a singer/musician, I am AMAZED to hear that she can sing and stay on pitch! It's hard enough when your hearing is fine! Kudos to her!

I introduced her to camping this summer. Our friend, who is also a musician, always brings his guitar. He was playing and singing while boobalah and I were fixing dinner. She walked up to him and started singing with him. We just stood back and watched the 2 of them. Then he started playing one of my least favorite songs, Summertime. She started singing and the look on his face at how wonderful she sounded was a Kodak moment. I wish I'd taken a picture.

She started losing her hearing in her teens. Both her parents and 1 sibling all had hearing aids before the age of 20.

She also plays the flute, piano, organ and just about any keyboard you can throw at her.

She's a med tech. Start throwing chemical (used in medicine) names at her and she can tell you what they are, when and why they are used and what not to do with them. She went to school and has tons of training in that area. Somehow, I just don't feel you can be mentally impaired and have that ability.

FrouFrou
12-22-2006, 03:55 PM
It is sad but people are just ummm, ______ not sure what I want to put there.

I've seen it one too many times. A childhood friends (we are still friends today) parents are deaf and people for some reason associate being deaf with being dumb. I never got it because they are/were (her mother passed away a few years ago) intelligent.

KUDOS to your friend though, she sounds like a GREAT friend!

4myloves
12-22-2006, 05:11 PM
It is sad but people are just ummm, ______ not sure what I want to put there.

I think "ignorant" is the word you're looking for.